Ch. 25 Knowing this is it
(FITZ)
"If we go to the hospital they'll call my dad," Clare says trying to argue but she sounds very weak.
"We're going to a clinic down the street, they're used to us kids coming in and they never call our parents. And if I see your father I'm going to kill him myself." I tell her.
Jason parks at the clinic and opens the back door; he picks Clare up and hands her to me when I'm out of the car.
"Dr. McQuaid," Jason calls holding the door open for me.
"Fitz, Jason who's this and what happened?" Dr. McQuiad asks coming over.
"Clare, my girlfriend she got thrown into a wall and hit her head." I tell him.
"Yes I can see that, Doug get a wheelchair and take Clare down to x-ray." Dr. McQuaid says and a guy comes over with a wheelchair. I put Clare in the wheelchair and that Doug guy starts wheeling her down the hall; I try and follow but Doc stops me. "When she's done we'll take her into room three you two can wait there."
I sigh and go down the hall to room three with Jason following me. We sit down in the room and wait while I watch the clock and hope Clare's okay. The doc comes in wheeling Clare with him and she gets out of the wheelchair sitting on the exam table. Dr. McQuaid takes out a little flashlight and looks at Clare's eyes, moving the light so she follows it with her eyes.
"Can you tell me what day it is Clare?" He asks her.
"Monday," she says.
"Very good and your full name?" He asks her.
"Clare Diana Edwards," she answers, the doc looks at me and I nod.
He turns off the little flashlight and takes the bandages off of her head to have look, then there's a knock on the door. The doc opens it and someone hands him a big yellow envelope. He closes the door and turns on the light box putting up Clare's x-rays.
"There is no bleeding or swelling on the brain and no blood clots. Your responses are a little slow though and given your other symptoms I think you have a low grade concussion. We're going to keep you here for a couple of hours for observation and then we'll send you home. You'll have to wake her up every hour tonight and come see us in the morning. In the meantime these will help with your pain. If you guys need anything let us know and I'll be back in a couple of hours." Dr. McQuaid says giving her two pills, a little cup of water and then leaves the room.
"You guys want anything? I'll go get us some sodas and magazines or something." Jason offers.
"Yeah that would be good we need something to do, you want anything?" I ask Clare.
"No I just don't feel good and I'm tired," she says.
"No no can't fall asleep, stay with me." I tell her sitting on the exam table with her.
"I'll be back in a bit," Jason says and leaves the room.
"I know you don't feel well but you can't fall asleep, stay awake, talk to me about something." I prod her.
"I don't have anything to talk about, you talk. Tell me about your mom," she responds.
I really don't want to talk about my mom or my family so I get a better idea. "I know how to keep you awake," I grin.
I cup her chin and take her lips, my tongue slips out probing her bottom lip. Her lips part granting me access as her hand grips at my hair. My hand slides up her curves and her shirt; she hitches a breath and deepens the kiss. I know we can't go too far, not only can someone walk in any minute but she has a concussion and I may not be too bright but I'm sure sex is bad for a concussion. I do manage to keep her awake until Jason gets back with sodas and magazines. He got ginger ale for her and a girl magazine; she perks up when she sees that whiny guy that plays a vampire in those stupid movies, I don't know his name but he's on the cover of her magazine. Jason got us cokes, comics and Sports Illustrated. When the doc finally comes back in she's still awake.
"How do you feel Clare?" He asks her.
"A little better since the pain pills kicked in," she replies.
"Good, I'm going to have another look at you and then we'll send you home." Doc says.
He checks her eyes and head again then reminds me to wake her up every hour, that she needs to take it easy today and to bring her back tomorrow. She signs some discharge papers and the nurse tells us we can go home.
"If I have to stay awake all night maybe we shouldn't go back to the hotel," she says when we're in the car.
"Can you drop us at the ravine?" I ask Jason.
"Yeah sure," he shrugs.
He drives us out to the Dot and we get out, he says he'll come get us in the morning. Clare and I go into the woods and start walking to the ravine.
"My head feels big and these bandages are itchy," she complains scratching at the gauze around her head.
"Your head is fine and you need the bandages because your head was bleeding. We can probably take them off in a little bit." I tell her releasing her hand I was holding and putting my arm around her waist.
"Everyone's going to ask what happened, I don't want them to know about my father." She tells me.
"So I'll tell them some big guy was hitting on you, I kicked his ass and you got caught in the crossfire." I respond.
It's late afternoon and I can hear the kids at the ravine most of them are already drunk. Very few people pay any attention to the fact that Clare has a bandage around her head. All the people that hang out here are used to seeing other kids with bandages, bruises, black eyes and other wounds. Usually picked up in battle with parents or other kids, sometimes self inflicted but on one says anything if you show up hurt. I kick a couple of people off the ripped out car seat and we sit down. I make Morris get her a bottle of water and me a beer. When he returns with our drinks I start talking to Morris and Clare just sort of stares at the fire. Typically she does that when she's got something on her mind, today I think it's just the concussion. Then I hear a voice I haven't heard in over a year, he's talking to kids coming in and I can't see him yet.
"What's Valieri doing here?" I question and Clare spits out the sip of water she just took and I look at her.
"Lucas is here? I don't want him to see me here!" She insists panicking and starting to stand up.
"Hey we're not here," I tell Morris and take Clare into the van before Lucas gets to us. "Why are you so worried about Valieri seeing you?" I ask Clare.
"He's Jane's brother and I don't want him to tell anyone I was here." She says.
"I didn't think you knew Lucas that well." I remark.
"I don't, not really but I know Jane pretty well and Mia. If Lucas sees me here like this he might tell someone and I'll be sent back to my dad." She replies.
I open my mouth to talk but Lucas yells before I can say anything.
"ANYONE SEEN CLARE EDWARDS?!"
She curls up wrapping her knees to her chest and her arms around her legs. I guide her to lie down and put the blanket over her just in case Lucas opens the van door. I hear the others say they haven't seen Clare and then Lucas asks if they've seen me.
"Yeah," one of the girls speaks up; I think her name is Marie, "he's in the van waiting for me." She says.
I hear footsteps coming to the van; I bunch up the blanket, take off my shirt and lie in front of Clare. The door opens a few second later and Marie climbs in.
"Hey Lucas long time buddy," I remark when he appears behind Marie.
"Fitz you seen Clare around she's missing?" He asks me.
"No haven't seen her in a while, why do you care if she's missing?" I ask him putting my arm around Marie so it looks like we're together.
"Because she's missing and people are looking for her, you guys see her you call me or Adam Torres." He tells us and I feel Clare tense up.
"Yeah sure, can you close the door now I'm trying to get busy here?" I assert and slam the van door closed.
Lucas tells anyone that's seen Clare to call him or Adam and he finally walks off. I pull the blanket off of Clare; she's biting her lip and looks like she might cry.
"Hey thanks Marie," I say and she smiles.
"Yeah sure we'll spread the word to keep it hushed about Clare. Owen and Bianca have been around too asking lots of questions and if we've seen you. Hey she okay? That bandage on her head is bleeding again." Marie points out and I look at Clare.
"Yeah she got her head knocked earlier, doc said she's got a small concussion and I gotta wake her up every hour." I explain.
"I'm okay, my head hurts again though," Clare says sitting up.
"I'll get you something," I tell Clare.
She nods and the three of us get out of the van, she walks back to the empty car seat and I look around the group. Mick is here and he's usually got a whole medicine cabinet of drugs on him.
"Hey Mick you got something for a bad headache?" I ask him.
He pulls out a little bag filled with a rainbow of pills and looks at it. "How 'bout some vicodin?" He offers and I nod.
He gives me the pill and I walk back to the seat where Clare should be but she's not.
"Where's Clare?" I question.
"She borrowed my phone and went that way," Morris shrugs to me.
I growl at him and go through the trees in the direction he was pointing, I hear her talking and my chest gets tight.
(CLARE)
"Hey Morris can I borrow your phone?" I ask him as soon as Fitz is on the other side of the fire.
"Yeah I guess," he replies and takes his phone from his pocket.
I walk over into the woods a little bit, it's dark now but there's enough light form the fire and the moon. After Lucas said Adam's name I felt horribly guilty, I never meant to worry Adam and I don't want him looking for me. It takes me a second to remember his cell number and then I dial it. His phone is off or he's on the other line because it goes straight to voicemail.
"It's me, listen I'm fine and you have to stop looking for me. Just tell everyone I'm okay, tell them to stop looking and that I'm okay p…"
I can't say anything else because the phone gets ripped from my hand and turned off.
"What are you doing?" Fitz demands.
"Calling Adam so he knows I'm okay, I didn't tell him I was with you. I just didn't want him to worry." I tell Fitz.
"But you talked to him?! Did you talk to Drew?" He growls a little.
"I didn't talk to anyone I got Adam's voicemail and I called Adam not Drew." I respond.
"But you called; you want to be back there with him? You want to go back to Drew?" He says in an accusatory tone as he gets angrier with every word.
"Mark that's not fair all I did was call Adam so he would stop worrying, so he would stop looking for me. He's my best friend, he's worried or he wouldn't be looking for me. He might be the only friend I have left and I don't want him spending all his time looking for me. I called Adam not Drew, Drew hates me." I remind him.
"So if Drew showed up right now to rescue you from this life you wouldn't go with him?" Fitz questions trying to sound hard but he can't hide the pain in his voice.
"That isn't fair Fitz you're asking me if I would leave this life, I'm not used to this life and I'm terrified. I remember having a normal life with a normal family, having parents that cared about me and an older sister to look up to. Now my mother's left me, my sister is dead and my father hates me so much he told me I should have died instead of my sister and thinks of me as nothing more than an object to make money off of. I can't go back to that life because if my dad gets his hands on me he'll lock me in my room and charge men money to come do whatever they want to me. That's terrifying to me and it hurts, it hurts to know that my father hates me so much he sees me as less than human. But this life I've been thrown into, I'm not used to it and it scares me that I'm in this life now. I used to have promise and now what? I'll die at 25 on the streets or worse! I don't want to be in this life! I don't want to admit that I'll never go back to school, that I'll never go to University or have that promising life everybody told me I would have when they called me gifted. I don't like this life; I don't like sleeping in a dilapidated hotel where we have to lock our room with a padlock! I don't like being so afraid to go to the washroom in the middle of the night that I have to wake you up to go with me. I don't like being afraid of most of the people we live with. I don't like eating cold pop tarts for breakfast and chips for lunch and sneaking over to your parent's house every few days to shower! I don't want to be in this life, I…"
"IF YOU WANT TO GO BACK TO DREW AND GO BACK TO YOUR PERFECT LIFE THAN GO!" Fitz yells and walks past me.
"MARK FITZGERALD STOP!" I yell at him and he stops. I walk over to him and get in front of him, he doesn't walk past me. "I didn't say that! I'm scared Fitz, I'm not used to this life but I can't go back to my old one. Would I leave this life for even a semblance of my old one if I could? Yes I would but I wouldn't leave you." I tell him and he relaxes a little.
"You wouldn't go back to Drew? Even though he's better than me?" Fitz asks me.
"What makes you think he's better than you?" I question.
"He's a jock, he has rich parents, a nice house and you best friend is his brother." Fitz lists off.
"I hate sports, Drew hates me and he was always trying to fix everything. The only thing that makes this life bearable is you Mark. In spite of the mean exterior you portray you're not mean. When you care about people you're really sweet and protective of them. Like Lola and Sammy at the hotel." I point out.
"Yeah well they're nice girls, they got sad stories and mean families I kinda think of them like sisters." He shrugs kicking his shoe in the dirt and looking sheepish.
"Yeah and you care about them and I know you care about me. You wouldn't have come to my house those nights and stayed over if you didn't. You wouldn't have beat up my father or rushed me to the clinic, or gotten so worried I'd return to Drew if you didn't. I don't like this life and it scares me but I couldn't survive it at all if not for you. I called Adam only so he wouldn't worry, he's my friend still but that doesn't mean I'm going back to Drew. I…" I'm making my third or fourth extended speech and stop when I get dizzy and start to feel queasy.
I turn falling to my knees and hands, vomiting for the second time that day as I'd done the same just before my x-ray. There wasn't much in my stomach so there wasn't much to come up again.
"You okay?" Fitz asks kneeling down and putting his hand at my lower back.
"I don't feel so good too much talking I think," I reply turning over to sit and leaning on my hands.
Fitz picks me up and I put my hands around his neck. "Doc did say you should take it easy today and I've been arguing with you." He says in an apologetic tone. He takes me to the van again putting me on the bed; he leaves the van and comes back with a couple things of water. "Here have some water and I got you this for your head." He tells me handing me a small pill.
"What is it?" I question.
"It's just vicodin," he smiles.
I swallow the pill with some water and lay down; Fitz kept the door open so we can see the fire and hear the other kids. He takes out his phone and presses a bunch of buttons. Then he sets it on the bed at his other side and lays down pulling me into his arms. The vicodin does help my head but not my stomach; I don't throw up the rest of the night. After a few hours in the van we go back out to the fire. Fitz set alarms on his phone in case we fell asleep so he could wake me up every hour but we never fall asleep. We stay up with a couple of other guys and when the sun starts to come on Tuesday morning up we walk to the Dot. I wait in the back alley while he goes in the front and gets us some breakfast. He called Jason and we wait in the back alley because DeGrassi kids could walk by any minute to get to school, especially if there were any early morning practices. The clinic was open so we went in and the reception nurse recognized us. She took us back to an exam room and Dr. McQuaid came in a few minutes later.
"How are you feeling today Clare, any problems last night?" Dr. McQuaid asks.
"I threw up again and got a little dizzy while we were arguing," I reply as he looks at my eyes and then takes off the bandages to check the bump.
"Arguing doesn't sound like taking it easy, any problems while she was sleeping?" He asks Fitz.
"We never went to bed so no," he responds.
"Okay well everything looks fine but you do need to get some sleep. I think we'll keep you here in one of the beds in the back for a few hours so you can sleep." Dr. McQuaid says.
"I'm staying with her," Fitz speaks up in a firm voice.
"Of course Fitz," the doctor nods.
"You might as well go Jason, if we need a ride back I'll call you," Fitz tells Jason.
"Alright cool see you guys later," Jason says and leaves the room.
Dr. McQuiad takes us down a hall to the very back of the clinic and a room marked quarantine. The room is empty and we don't need to be quarantined but it's private and there are a couple of beds. I do find it a little ironic though as I feel like I've been quarantined from the rest of my life and friends.
"You two get some sleep; I'll have a nurse come wake up Clare a couple of times just to be safe but otherwise get some rest." He tells us in an authoritative voice.
Fitz closes the curtain around one of the beds to make it even more private, of course he's going to sleep in the same bed as me. I sit on the bed and slip off my shoes, getting under the sheet and thin blanket. Fitz gets in with me after taking off his shoes, pulls the blanket up, his arms go tightly around me and it doesn't take long for either of us to fall asleep.
(OWEN)
"Jenna hasn't heard from her either, as far as I can tell no one has. It's not like Clare to just disappear." K.C. says as we warm up for football practice Monday after school.
"Yeah but she's been through a lot these last couple of months and she was starting to crack, the death of her sister and the way her dad handled it just pushed her over the edge." I remark.
"And me yelling at her," Drew laments.
"Yeah that didn't help but I've been thinking about that too, I think you played right into Fitz's hands. He got in your head and probably hers, he's done it before by getting her to go to Vegas Night with him. It seems a little too convenient that his buddy would just happen to mention that Fitz has been with her. He probably was in her room, he probably did sleep with her in the van at the ravine. But I'm certain all they did was sleep, at least at that point, not too sure about now. We had no idea what was going on with her and we know how her dad is. Like it or not Fitz does care about her, he probably went to her house to keep her dad from killing her. She may have gone to the ravine because she was locked in her room again and had to go out the window. Or she was hurt and afraid to go to my house or yours because she knew we'd flip out and try and get her out of her father's house again. Whatever the reason I'm sure she wasn't cheating on you, I'm also sure Fitz got in her head and got confused when she was already vulnerable." I tell them.
"I don't care what happened, let's just find her and get her away from Fitz." Drew says.
Before anyone else can say anything Armstrong blows the whistle and makes us line up. We have two hours of grueling football practice and then he sends us to the showers. As we're leaving the school for the parking lot we see Lucas walking out from the ravine. Clare isn't with him so I would assume she isn't in the ravine.
"Hey Lucas!" I call to him and he walks over.
"She wasn't in the ravine but Fitz was he was with some other chick in the van. I told them to call me or Adam if anyone sees her." He tells us.
"Thanks, we're heading back to my place. Adam, Peter and Sav are there if you want to follow us back." Drew offer to Lucas.
"Yeah sure," Lucas shrugs.
Drew and I go to my car, Lucas is parked a few spaces down. He follows us to Drew's place and walks into the basement with us.
"Anything?" Adam asks.
"Saw Fitz at the ravine but Clare wasn't with him. He was in the van with some other girl." Lucas tells them.
"We haven't heard anything either, Bianca's still out she should be here soon." Adam says.
"Great so no one's heard from her, the girl just vanished." Drew gripes collapsing on the sofa.
"Mom ordered us pizza," Adam says pushing the box toward his brother.
"I'm not hungry," Drew shakes his head pushing the box back.
My phone rings and I pull it from my pocket, Bianca's picture flashes on the screen and I hit accept.
"Hey B," I say and everyone looks over at me.
"Hey I haven't seen Clare but I showed her picture around near Crossing's Diner and a few people said they saw her around one. They said they saw Clare get in a fight with an older guy that sounds like her father. Another guy that I'm pretty sure was Fitz beat her father but Clare got hurt. I haven't been able to track her down after that. Look I gotta get home, tell Drew and Adam would you." Bianca requests.
"Yeah no problem, Lucas said he saw Fitz at the ravine but Clare wasn't there." I inform her.
"So if she did get hurt it must have been pretty bad. I'll try and call some of the hospitals when I get home, call you later." Bianca replies and hangs up.
"Bianca showed Clare's picture around and a few people said they saw Clare get into a confrontation with an older guy. B is pretty sure the older guy was Clare's father. They also saw some other guy B is pretty sure was Fitz beat on her father and Clare got hurt. Sh…" I'm interrupted by the Torres brothers and Peter yelling at the same time.
"SHE'S HURT!"
"We don't know that's what Bianca heard that's it, that's all she knows. But this was around one and if Fitz was in the ravine this evening without Clare then she was probably hurt pretty bad. Bianca's going to call around to some hospitals if she can. She's on her way home now," I enlighten them.
"She's hurt?! Did her dad hurt her or Fitz? How bad is she hurt?" Drew rambles as his expression and voice fluctuate between angry, worried and guilt.
"Drew I don't know we'll call some hospitals too," I tell him trying to comfort him.
Drew just sinks back into the sofa and looks like he might be sick. Peter and I get out our phones and start calling hospitals within a ten mile radius of the school. Adam and Lucas begin calling too but Drew is just blank. After calling ten hospitals that have no record of a Clare Edwards or Mark Fitzgereald or anyone fitting Clare's description I set down my phone with a heavy sigh. No one else has any luck either, if she's hurt she's not at a hospital.
"What if she's dead?" Drew questions quietly.
"She's not dead Drew, we'll find her man. Look I'm gonna go home and grab some clothes and I'll be back. I'll stay the night; we'll call all night if we have to. I'll swing by her house on my way home. I'll be back in about half an hour." I assert and leave.
The drive to Clare's house only takes a few minutes I park out front and her dad's car is in the driveway. I ring the doorbell and he answers, he looks worse than before, one side of his face looks like hamburger meat.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" Her father slurs at me.
"Move," I respond pushing her father out of the way.
I run up to Clare's room and open the door, the rooms been cleaned up from the last time I saw it but it's different too. Most of the stuff is gone, there are black and red sheets on the bed, a bowl of condoms next to the bed and handcuffs are connected to eye bolts in Clare's headboard.
"What the fuck is all this?!" I demand as her father stumbles up the stairs.
"Clare's room, when she comes back she has to go to work and earn her keep. I almost had her today but thank punk kid stopped me. I'm gonna make her pay for that one too." He slurs leaning against the wall as he waves his can of beer around.
"Work?! Wait are you trying to turn your own daughter into a prostitute in your own house?!" I exclaim.
"She was already a whore…fucking slut like her mother! Only thing she's good for is getting fucked for money! I got a list of men waiting to fu…"
He doesn't finish because I belt his already broken face! He falls back and goes unconscious, his can of beer falling and spilling around him. I would like to think he was drunk and he's not serious but given the new décor in Clare's room I'd say he was dead serious. I stare at him for a second then leave that house, I hate to admit it but Clare is safer with Fitz than her dad. One thing is for certain she is never setting foot in this house if I can help it. I rush home grab a bag and stuff my clothes into it before going back out to the living room.
"Sleeping at Drew's be home tomorrow night," I tell my parents then disappear out of the house.
I drive to Drew's house in record time and by pure luck don't pass any cops. I'm still pissed when I get there, more than pissed! I can't believe Clare's father would do that to her! I knew he was an asshole but human trafficking of your own daughter! I go through the basement door and slam it shut! Adam's the only one down here now and he's doing his homework but looks up at me when I slam the door.
"What's with you?" Adam asks.
"Where's your brother?" I question.
"Upstairs in the shower why did you find Clare?" Adam questions.
"No but I went by her house, Fitz or whoever it was beat her dad good. I went up to her room Adam, her dad's changed it. He's got red and black sheets on her bed, condoms by the bed and handcuffs in her headboard. He told me…" I have to stop talking because I'm so angry and my fists clench at the thought. "He told me that if she comes back to that house she's going to be made to be a hooker for his friends. He said that was the only thing she was good for anymore and he had clients lined up!"
"He…but she's his daughter…" Adam breathes.
"I know but I don't think he cares, I think she's not even a person to him anymore! I punched him out and just left! All I know is she can't ever go back to that house!" I affirm to Adam and he nods.
"Our parents are out late I'll call Mom and tell her you're sleeping over." Adam says pulling out his phone. "I have a voicemail; I don't remember having a voicemail." He remarks and listens to the voicemail then goes a little white.
"What is it?" I ask him.
"The message is from Clare," he tells me and replays the message putting it on speaker.
"It's me," Clare's voice says, she sounds sad but determined, "listen I'm fine and you have to stop looking for me. Just tell everyone I'm okay, tell them to stop looking and that I'm okay p…"
The phone call ends abruptly, it sounds like the phone is grabbed away and then there's dial tone.
"She didn't sound scared but she didn't exactly say she was okay." Adam comments but he doesn't sound very comforted by the phone call.
"The phone was grabbed from her hand and hung up by someone else but she wasn't asking for help she was telling us to stop looking. She so…" I stop talking when I hear Drew coming back down the stairs.
His hair is wet and he's in clean clothes. He stops at the bottom of the stairs when we both look at him with the same expression.
"What? What is it? Do we know something about Clare?" He questions rapidly.
Update next Friday picking up from about here and an appearance by Eli