ninja lamp
fable II
Sparrow, Theresa, Dog
Sparrow blinked, mind and eyes scrambling to come together on a consensus of what the fuck was going on.
"Theresa?"
"Yes, Sparrow?"
"I'm confused. I thought caves where, y'know, dark. Like, fall on your face down a ravine into the jaws of a waiting monster dark."
The disembodied voice chuckled. "That is generally the case, Hero. Why do you ask?"
Sparrow slowly spun about, trying to catch the new conundrum off guard. "Well, this one was, and now it's not. And I'm bloody glowing. Is this another weird Hero thing you 'forgot' to mention? Like I turn into a fairy or, collect the rays of the sun and then release them when it gets dark? I'm not going to catch fire or grow wings or something, am I?"
"Ah, I believe I understand. You see young Hero, wherever you go your path will always be illuminated so long as you have the Guild Seal in possession."
He stopped his twisting about, staring blankly at a stalactite. "So what you're basically saying is the seal thing's a lamp. An invisible lamp."
"No, Sparrow, the Seal is not invisible-"
"No, but the lamp is. Like a, a, a ninja. Yes, the Guild Seal has a ninja lamp." He nodded his head in affirmation. Problem solved.
"I believe you misunderstand-"
"Nope, think not. Think I get it quite well, thanks. Now shush, I have cave monsters to sneak up on. Which may pose a problem, thanks to this ninja lamp that I haven't the foggiest on how to turn off…"
Shrugging, Sparrow marched off into the cave, mind creating fantastical reasons as to the reason for him being at the center of a halo of light. He chuckled mischievously. "I wonder, if I can convince people I'm some sort of sun god, will they worship me and give me free things? " He glanced down at fluffnugget. "Maybe then we could eat something other than shoes! And I'm sure you'd like something other than that belt as a collar. And then I could use that to keep my pants up." He tugged at his trousers subconsciously, making sure they were still sitting properly. That was the last time he accepted clothes from someone who had just had a kid.