Chapter 22

I'm a stitch away from making it

And a scar away from falling apart, apart

Blood cells pixelate

And eyes dilate

And the full moon pills got me out on the street at night

05/17/2014 4:35pm

Finally, they'd been able to return to their apartment. The repairs were finished and Mitsuru didn't mind them living there as long as they didn't stay during the Midnight Hour. It was too obvious a place for Shadows to attack, since they now knew where Aila lived. Nonetheless, through all of the insanity of the past few months, the girl had never felt more at home.

So, as the boys had other matters to attend to, Aila remained in the apartment alone. She knew that Mitsuru had bugged most of her clothing, so she didn't ponder going outside too much…even if she desired to speak with Shouta again.

Aila was reminded of his words about Minako, that she was trying to take her over and steal her cousin's body. It was something that Aila didn't want to believe. However, considering how violent her mood/memory swings had been as of late, she wasn't able to find any reasons to argue in Minako's favor.

The trouble was, though, why were the memories trying to take her over? Minako was the Great Seal, and therefore couldn't have any influence over the events in the real world. Was there something else at work? Something that no one was seeing?

A Shadow before had said He would stop her. That He would be the one to slay her before a great destiny could be realized. If Mina wasn't the cause of this memory overload, then who was? Maybe Shouta had some more answers…..

Aila had been forced to give back Minako's trinkets, as Mitsuru had without words declared them to be dangerous weapons in the girl's hands. Aila didn't disagree, but there had been one item that she'd managed to keep; it was Ryoji's silver ring. It was the only object that made her feel calm and comforted. She knew that she was closer to the boy when she wore it on her finger or on a chain around her neck. She hoped that it'd help to keep her safe…if there was such a thing anymore.

Aila went to the mirror in her bathroom. She'd stopped trying to dye her hair over and over again; the roots would start growing back full-force when she tried to bury them. It was futile to fight back. As she stared into the glass, she felt her mind grow heavier. It was harder trying to remember what she herself looked like, anymore. She'd had distinct differences from her cousin before, especially in her facial features, but now she could only seem to focus on all of the things that made her similar to Minako.

The front entrance opened. "I'm back," Akihiko called. Aila cast her eyes to the sink.

"I'm in the bathroom," she returned, closing the door softly.

"Oh, okay." She heard footsteps move past the bathroom. "I'm going to take a nap."

"'K." Since the night they'd kissed, things had been awkward and quiet between the two roommates. The silverette had in addition become more and more concerned about her well-being, which hadn't helping with their shaken bond. In truth, Aila hadn't remembered much of the night she'd found Minako's treasures. She'd probably seemed insane when she'd returned to Akihiko calm and collected, as though nothing had happened. After the events of the last full moon, she'd at last recalled the steamy details, but didn't bring them up. It was enough that she'd rejected him once; it was best now to try to forget the second stab to his heart.

When she grew tired of looking at herself, she exited the bathroom. To her surprise, Akihiko was waiting for her outside. She jumped upon seeing him.

"Sorry," he said quickly. His cheeks turned pink; no doubt he was thinking of their embrace. It was obvious in his face that he that the memory troubled him. "I just…wanted to see if you're alright."

Aila looked to the bandages over his ears. "I think I should be asking you that." She had to repeat the statement for the boy to hear, but he just shrugged.

"It's fine," he said. "Nothing too serious. I'm more concerned about your health." Aila felt the weight inside her mind expand. He was being too nice; she'd nearly demolished her friends' hearing that night. They were lucky enough to come out with minor injuries.

"I'll live." Her default answer. It hadn't failed her before, but she felt that its winning-streak was straining to keep up to her close-calls.

"Alright." Akihiko tried to hold her gaze, but she couldn't take his concern. She waved him off quickly, stating that she was going to take a shower. He retired to her bedroom after much hesitation; despite the awkwardness between them, it seemed that they couldn't sleep without the other's body or scent or breathing noises on the same mattress. When she was busy with other things, Akihiko would always nap with Aila's favorite jacket over his shoulders. The smell she left on the fabric was enough to lull him into slumber. Aila found herself doing the same when she was alone.

When she was in the bathroom again, Aila turned on the water, but didn't get in. It was just background noise as she sat fully clothed on the ground. No matter what happened between them, Aila did not want to hurt Akihiko. He was precious to her, yet she only seemed to cause him pain and confusion. This cursed fate-wherever it was leading her-meant that she'd never stop making him suffer...not as long as Minako's memories intruded.

Slowly, she stood from the ground and approached the toilet. Hidden behind it was the prescription bottle Shouta had given her. She took them to the mirror and rubbed off the steam that gathered on the glass. Aila took one last clear look at what she was seeing; a girl without reason or strength or choice in her destiny. She was nothing, simply because she wasn't allowed to be anything but a house for the memories to gather. A house for something that wanted her body for itself. Yep, she was just a shell for such things….

Aila gripped the bottle in her fingers. No. She still had the ability to make choices. Not just because she'd been told so by Igor so long ago, but because she was here now, holding an item that could easily mean her chance at retribution. She could choose to struggle through the takeover without help…or she could take the easier path and begin her battle anew from there.

Without a resolved sigh or much thought, she twisted off the cap and poured two capsules into her mouth. The funny part was that only moments after they entered her system, she felt a hundred times better than she had in months. A memory had tried to intrude...it had something to do with the pills and one of the other team members...but it was gone before she could really examine it.

…. …. ….

05/23/2014 7:35pm

Shinjiro wondered why he ever agreed to this. He watched Aila fumble with her naginata as she tried to adjust her hold on the staff.

"Just stop," he told the girl at last. Aila did so and Shinjiro sighed. "What the hell happened to your form?"

Aila gave a childish pout. "I usually have Fate help me fight." The boy before her pinched the bridge of his nose. He was suddenly starting to feel exhausted.

"Maybe it's best to just use your Persona when you're in trouble."

Aila's head hung low. "But…I can't rely on that. I want to be able to fight without her..." Aila gripped her naginata, her knuckles bleaching. "I want to be strong enough to protect myself and everyone else…without my powers."

Shinjiro gave a small "hmm" with a smile. Aila flushed.

"What?"

"Nothin'." He shoved his hands into his pockets. "We don't have much time. Mitsuru's only lettin' us in here for a few more hours. So start swingin'."

This girl had asked him to train her only a few days before and he found it difficult to argue with her motivation. As Aila practiced her strikes, he shook his head and told her what she was doing wrong…which was with every swing she made. As he tried to instruct her, he wondered often if he was being too harsh. However, the girl took each and every word to heart, and did (finally) show signs of improvement after an hour or so.

…. …. ….

9:01pm

"Sorry," Aila mumbled again. She'd been dragging her feet on the way home and feared that she was upsetting her friend with how slow she walked. However, Shinjiro didn't mind her exhaustion. It allowed them some time to relax before getting back to the apartment…and the obsessively protective Akihiko. Honestly, Shinjiro didn't know what to do with that boy. He felt just as concerned for Aila's safety as the silverette…but at least he didn't smother her with it.

"Tch," Shinjiro said at last, uncertain if it was meant to be towards her or Aki. Luckily, Aila knew him well enough to discern his "happy" noises from his upset ones. She gave a relieved smile.

"Well, if you're okay with it, can we take a quick break?"

Shinjiro turned to see that she was about to collapse. "Sure," he mumbled. They were in the Paulownia area and found an empty bench to rest at. Several of them surrounded the fountain, which glittered gently as it reflected the starlight. The two companions sat close together at the long seat, but not too close. Aila seemed to be staring hard into the ground. Shinjiro considered asking her about it, but didn't want to start a bad habit of snooping (like a best friend who's name he wouldn't mention).

Aila noticed him staring and he quickly looked away before their eyes could meet. He could sense her curiosity.

"If you want to talk, then talk," he said to relieve her wonder. "Otherwise, it ain't any of my business what you've been worrying about for the past few weeks."

"Okay." Aila was quiet for a moment more. Her red eyes shot lasers into his cheek bone, to which he tried to deflect by scratching at his eyebrow. Then, at last, the small voice materialized: "What…was it like, when you had a Persona before this?"

He met her eyes; there was something deeper to the question. "Before the Shadow Operatives?"

"Well…." He knew what she was really asking now; he could see it in her pale face.

"When Ken's mom…." He didn't know how to start this story. Minako's memories probably gave her the gist of things already. "I was never able to get that night out of my head. It started killin' me to know that I was still alive when she…wasn't."

"Oh." Aila shifted uncomfortably. "What did you do?"

"Somethin' really stupid."

"What?" He met her gaze. He wanted to be honest with her, but….

"….You already know."

"….Yeah." His near-death experience hung over them like a dark cloud, but Shinjiro wondered just how much she really knew about it. To clear the ambience, Aila adjusted herself to kneel backwards on the bench. Her fingers traced the fountain water behind them. "This thing is really pretty. I can see why everyone likes to hang out over here." She looked like a child-albeit a really tired one, but a child nonetheless. It made Shinjiro chuckle. Something inside of him was surfacing: an oddly-place confession.

"I owe Her my life, ya know." He stared up into the sky. Aila's burning gaze speared him again. "Can't tell you how many times she probably saved me in other ways, but it was the damn pocket watch that took the bullet….literally." He sighed. "If She hadn't found it…." He sometimes wondered whether he would've been happier in death. Maybe then, he'd get to spend an eternity with her…..

Then again, considering where Minako really was, he probably wouldn't have gotten that luxury.

"Oh, that reminds me!" Aila crossed her legs over the bench, facing towards her friend. She pulled a small white box out of her jacket pocket, then put it on Shinjiro's lap. He picked the square up, his eyebrow raising beneath his slumping hat. "Open it! Open it!" As Aila clapped her hands in hope and excitement, Shinjiro gave a laugh; it was nice that she was trying to lighten the mood for them. Slowly, he peeled the lid off of the box.

Before him sat a bronze pocket watch, shining brightly in the fountain's reflective gleam. He picked the thing up, weighed it in his hand, then swung the chain that it was attached to.

"What…" He didn't know what to say to her. In truth, the watch was beautiful. It's craftsmanship was perfect down to the interlocking notches along the edges. He gave Aila a strange look. "How much did it cost?"

"Shut up and take it," she hummed, sounding more adorable than threatening. "Does it really matter? When I saw it, I knew it was perfect for you."

Shinjiro felt something on the back and went to turn it. However, Aila's hands overtook his.

"There's an engraving," she admitted, "but I don't want you to look at it yet. You can read it when no one's around."

"Okay…." He was confused, but felt his heart start to…warm? Was that warmth creeping into his already sweating body? That reminded him that he needed to stop wearing turtlenecks under his damn coat….

"Do you like it?" Aila tried to read his expression, but it was clear that she wasn't getting anything. Shinjiro stared at their joined hands, his fingers clenching over the cold but welcoming metal.

"Thank you." He said it softly-so softly that he didn't think she'd hear him. However, she started to beam.

"It's actually my way of saying thanks to you," she told him. "You've been really supportive and understanding since we met. For a while, I thought it was because I look like Mina, but in all honesty…." She blushed at their hands, but didn't move them right away. "I feel like you're one of the only people that sees me."

Shinjiro wanted to consider that for a moment, but she'd already pulled back and stood up.

"Well, I'm rested enough. Let's head home." She tried to smile, but it was obvious to Aila's friend that she wasn't feeling any better than before. He put the pocket watch back in its box, then shoved it into his pocket. As the girl started faltering forward, Shinjiro grabbed her arm. She felt very warm in his grip.

"You worked out too hard today," he muttered. She gave him an absent hum. Before she could pass out, Shinjiro helped her onto his back. She wasn't light, but she wasn't heavy either. He was certain that he'd be able to carry her back home without any accidents. As she pressed into the piggyback, Shinjiro felt her breath against his neck. It made the hairs stand up, but he kept his stride slow and calm. He didn't even care that others among the nightlife were staring at him; having her on his back was…strangely calming.

She kept muttering something as he carried her home. He couldn't catch all of it, but the noises still made him chuckle. She was like a child, sometimes reminding him so much of Aki that it was startling. They were perfect for each other….

The thought made his chest churn in agony. He was doing it again. His heart was starting to wish for something that he felt wasn't his to desire. He hadn't deserved Minako and certainly didn't deserve this…saint.

Nonetheless, having Aila close and feeling her touch had saved his life-both literally and metaphorically. He had felt something similar to this before, but this was somehow different. He wished that he could understand what it meant. She wasn't Minako, and therefore didn't give him the same feeling of comfort as She once had, but there was definitely something in Aila that made his soul feel at peace.

All too soon, they were back at home. Aki was still up, waiting near the door like a puppy would for its master. Upon seeing the unconscious Aila, he started making panicked faces. Shinjiro swiftly brushed him off and took the girl to her room. He didn't bother changing her out of her jeans, shirt and jacket; he may have been a thug, but he had some manners. Instead, he pulled the covers up to her shoulders. She gave a happy sigh and burrowed into the soft sheets. This roused another chuckle to Shinjiro's throat, but he buried it. Now was not the time to feel…whatever it was that tried to breach the wall around his heart. As he watched her snooze peacefully in the bed, he felt an urge swell over his head. He tried to bury that, too, but it persisted mercilessly and threatened not to let him leave until the act was committed. Glancing back for any signs of Aki, he let his fingers run through the girl's half-pink hair. It was enjoyable for a moment.

"Dammit, you're burnin' up," he stated, throwing another blanket over her. She must've caught a fever when she overexerted herself. She gave another moan, this one a bit more stressed than the last. Shinjiro was freed from his spell and swiftly left the room, refusing all vicious desires to glance back before closing her door.

"She okay?" Akihiko asked. He sounded casual enough, but the mutt couldn't completely disguise his worry.

"She has a fever," Shinjiro muttered, all kindness and serenity from before leaving his voice. "She probably got it from too much exercise. She just needs some rest." He walked past the boy, heading to his bed-couch. He sat back into the cushions as he waited for Aki's to retire to his own quarters. A creak and click did sound, but it was coming from Aila's room instead. Damn that silver-haired maniac.

When all was quiet, Shinjiro pulled out the new watch, as well as his old one. Looking at both-one disfigured and long past its prime while the other shining promises of something great and new-he let out a long, slow breath. He'd keep the silver one, he decided, if for no other reason than he owed it his life. He tucked the piece inside of the box and started arranging a spot for the bronze beauty. He'd almost completely forgotten about the secret engraving when he caught sight of it against the dim moonlight outside. It read this:

"However long the moon disappears, someday it must shine again."

... ... ...

The song is "The After(Life) of the Party" by Fall Out Boy. If only Aila had waited a few moments more, she may have realized something very important about the pills' side effects... What will become of her next?