Finding Him

by Living in a fantasy

You can be the straightest person in the world until you find that special someone. It is the feelings for that person that matter, and the challenges you are willing to face to be with them. A high school story of discovery, trust, and above all, love.

25. Time of Your Life

AN: So sorry for the wait everyone, but between NaNo (Which I won! Yay!) and finals, I have been buried. But enjoy the final Chapter of Finding Him.

/…/…/…/

Chapter 25: Time of Your Life

The next two weeks sped by. I was surprised by how easy it was to fall into the routine of Mello's home. I mean sure, I had spent a lot of time over there, tons of time actually, but staying there was different. Or, it was supposed to be. The only real difference was that I saw Mello all the time. If possible, I came to love his parents even more, who were sweet to me ad wouldn't let me pay for my own groceries. I slid money on the table sometimes, or in pockets, and sometimes they took it, but I usually found it folded up in my coat pocket or in my DS or something.

Living with Mello was just, amazing. His parents tried to convince me that they could convert their study into a bedroom for me, but I would much rather stay in Mello's room, plus I felt guilty about making them give up the room. Mello's dad did his work in there every night; I didn't want to drive him away because I needed a bedroom. I'd just end up hanging out in Mello's anyway.

We woke up around six on weekdays. Though I preferred to sleep longer, Mello set his alarm for six, and kept it across the room so one of us had to get up and turn it off. And once you're out of bed, you might as well stay up. Plus Mello was loud while he was getting ready. But we got up, had a simple breakfast (except on weekends, when his mom cooked for us), went to school, came back, hung out, and slept. Not much had changed.

Though I can't say our habits didn't…annoy each other. Don't get me wrong, living with Mello was great, but he definitely had a bit more of a temper when you were with him all the time.

"For the last time, would you turn that fucking game off?" he snapped, glare firmly on his face.

I glanced at him nonchalantly and went back to my game. "Nope." He threw his pencil against the wall and stood, marching towards me. "Quiet, you'll wake your parents and they'll think we're having sex on a school night," I said, not looking up.

He launched towards me, ripping the DS from my hands and tossing it on the bed behind him. "I said to stop it!"

"Hey!" I jumped up. "You're such an ass. You're lucky it's Pokémon and I can't die standing there."

He threw his hands up in the air in frustration. "Why don't you ever listen to me? I'm trying to study and all I hear is that stupid battle music, and it's turning my brain to mush! There's no way there's that many Pokémon hiding in the grass! It's so unrealistic!"

"Yes, Mello, the sheer amount of them is the unrealistic part of the game," I deadpanned.

He pushed passed me and collapsed at his desk, staring at his textbook, eyes flickering across the page quickly. I slowly moved around him and towards my game, but his foot shot out and I tripped over it, falling flat on my face with a small 'oof.' "Oops," he said innocently. "Did I do that?" I just glared at him. "Just turn it off."

I sat up and kicked at the leg of his chair. "I'll turn off the game when you turn off the fucking light so I can get some sleep. It's almost two in the morning, Mello! I'm tired!" I complained.

"I have a big test tomorrow, this is what I do on test nights."

"You act like you don't already know the material," I growled, climbing into my bed and pulling the covers over my head, trying to block out the light. I clambered upwards and towards his bed, finding my DS and slipping back into my own. Moments later the familiar battle music started and I grinned at his groan of annoyance.

"Matt!"

"Mello, two minutes, I need to catch this Haunter."

"Matt!"

"Rapidash I choose you!"

"…You have a Rapidash?"

"You know what a Rapidash is?"

"…"

I continued playing, Mello staying silent for several minutes. "Why are you playing Fire Red anyway? That one is old."

I shrugged even though he couldn't see it. "I'm getting in the mood for Black and White. I should have it by next week."

"Doesn't that not come out for another two months?" he questioned.

"I have my sources," I muttered vaguely, grinning in victory as I captured Haunter. I saved and turned off my DS, curling up in bed and closing my eyes. "I turned it off, now can we please sleep?" I whined. He said nothing so I huffed loudly, burying my head under the pillow and closing my eyes, willing the light to stop invading m sleeping space. I was so tired, and sleeping sounded wonderful.

I blinked groggily what felt like minutes later with a weight settling over my chest. I groaned and threw the covers off me, staring up at my very annoying boyfriend. "What?" I grumbled, glancing at the clock. An hour had passed, and the room was finally dark. Mello was smirking gleefully at me, and he leaned down, pressing his lips slowly to mine.

I pushed him away (rather weakly, since I was half asleep). "Mels, I'm tired."

"Did I say I wanted sex?" he asked, trying (and failing) to sound offended. Really, he just seemed amused, way too amused for someone who was up at three in the morning. "I thought you were a night owl?" he teased.

"I got like, three hours of sleep last night. I am trying to fix that yet here you are, sitting on me."

Mello chuckled and slipped under the blankets with me. I sighed dramatically but he simply pecked my lips and settled down, arm resting lightly on my chest. I couldn't fight the smile that slipped across my face. I couldn't imagine being happier than I was with him.

/…/…/…/

School was quickly coming to a close, something I was endlessly excited about. I was so done with assignments, tests, papers, and all that other crap. It was boring and there was too much of it. It was May at last, and finals were in two weeks. Somehow I expected Mello was going to be impossible to live with as they approached.

"I need to write that paper tonight," Mello was saying as we left the school and began to tread towards his car. "It's due on Thursday, so I have just under a week to do it, but I have a big test next week too, so I better work on it now."

"You're way too dedicated. Only you would go home on a Friday night to study in an empty house."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "Why? Did you have something else in mind?"

I shoved him, chuckling. "Pervert. I just meant that you were totally lame. Besides, I have work."

"You get off at eight, and my parents are going to that fancy dinner for my dad's work. Those things last until like, ten," he said, nudging me suggestively.

"How disgusting."

I closed my eyes, the burning desire to slam my head repeatedly into one of the nearby cars flaring up. "Leave us alone, Nick."

"Why, so you can keep gushing over your sex life? No thanks," he sneered.

"How about you get a life?" Mello asked. "It's pretty pathetic, the way you follow us around, especially now that you're one of the only people doing it."

He laughed. "You're calling me pathetic? What about your boy? I heard he's living with you because his family doesn't want him."

"Old news," I said flippantly, forcing back the sting from the comments. "That happened weeks ago, so I don't know why you're trying to bother me with it now."

"Does it not bother you?" he asked mockingly. "To know that your own family hates you?"

"Back off!" Mello yelled.

"Don't you feel like the pathetic one, being taken in by some guy who is only using you for sex? Where else would he get any in this town? But if you're willing to take it, why not, right Mello?" Nick smirked.

Mello launched himself at Nick and I grabbed his arms, forcing him back. We did not need to be suspended for fighting this close to the end of our high school years. "He's just trying to get to us, ignore him."

"You just don't want to believe it's true!" Nick hollered.

"I know it's not true," I stated calmly.

"How would you know?" Nick taunted.

"I just do. You wouldn't understand."

"And why not?" he asked.

I smirked at him. "Because the only possible sex you'd ever get would be from paying a prostitute, then the sex really only would be for the sake of having sex." Nick looked like he desperately wanted to say something, but couldn't find the words. "See you around." I pulled Mello with me and led him towards the car.

"Fuck you!" was Nick's intelligent reply.

"No thanks, I've got Mello for that!" I replied cheerfully.

"You're such a fag!"

"I am well aware," I said seriously, pushing Mello towards the driver's side door and moving around to the passenger seat. "Let's go."

Mello pulled on his seatbelt, setting a hand on my leg the moment I sat down. "You're so sexy when you act like that," he purred, thumb stroking back and forth across my leg.

"Am I?" I asked. "I'll have to do it more often." I scooted towards him, kissing him deeply on the lips before sliding to my seat and bucking up. "Let's go."

"So controlling today, Matty," he teased, but he sped away, flipping Nick off as he drove.

Work was long and dull; it was a slow day, and we had four people working so there was nothing to do but sit behind the counter and ring the occasional customer up. I watched the clock tick slowly. I'd never had a shift go by so slowly before.

The second the clock turned eight I punched out, said bye to my coworkers, and stepped outside. Mello's car was in the parking lot and I smiled, making a beeline for the vehicle and slipping in. "Hey," I said.

"Hey." We drove home in silence, Mello keeping careful watch on the road while I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. I was still tired since Mello kept me up studying every night.

We pulled up to the dark house and went in. "Want something to eat?" Mello asked, moving towards the kitchen.

I followed, leaning against the wall. "Sure wife, what are you cooking?"

He glared at me. "You better watch it or I'll toss the sandwich in the garbage."

I blinked at him. "You made me a sandwich?" I asked. He tossed it on the table and I smiled, gliding towards him to deliver a quick kiss. "Thanks."

He pushed me away. "Whatever."

I ate quickly and we retired to the living room, curling up on the couch. We both stared at the dark TV screen, saying nothing for a while. Eventually Mello's lips were pressed against my neck. I closed my eyes, relaxing my head against the back of the couch as he nibbled at my skin. Slowly his lips drifted across my jaw. I turned my head instinctively to meet him halfway. Our lips press together, unhurriedly at first, then slowly with more desire. His hands moved then, one brushing teasingly against my hip, the other finding its way to my hair, tugging softly. I pressed my tongue past his parted lips as he leaned back against the arm of the couch, giving me room to crawl on top of him. He used the new position to pull me closer.

It didn't take long after that for the make out session to escalate. Soon our hips began grinding together. My mouth moved to find his neck, a soft moan escaping his lips. "Bedroom," he muttered, pushing me off. I stood, pulling him up beside me.

We made it halfway to the stairs before he slammed me into the wall, lips moving frantically against mine. I arched into his touch and shoved him backwards and towards the stairs, stealing another quick kiss as we raced upstairs.

His bedroom door was closed, so I returned the favor, slamming him into it and tasting every inch of his mouth that I could. I heard his hand fumble for the doorknob and we nearly tumbled to the ground when he finally found it. The room was dark, and we didn't bother turning the light on. Soon my back was pressed against the wood of the door, our lips connected as he quickly locked it. I tugged at the hem of his shirt and he pulled it off quickly, hair sticking up humorously from the static. I chuckled and brushed it back down, pulling off my own striped shirt and letting it fall softly to the floor. My back is soon against the wood of the door again. One of his hands is pressing into the wood beside me, as if trying to prevent me from escaping, though I can't imagine why I would try to. The other is holding my chin in place. I used one of my hands to drag him as close as I could, the other tangling in his hair. Our hips moved in harmony, grinding together. I could feel his hard on through his pants, but that wasn't enough. I wanted all of him.

I pushed him back, my hands fumbling with his zipper as I led him towards the bed. It came loose and he kicked them off, allowing me to shove him back on the bed. I let my own jeans fall to the floor before joining him, crawling across his body and letting our hips meet desperately.

His hand slid into my boxers and I couldn't hold back the groan as he slowly began to pump me. "Like that?" he asked. I growled in frustration, yanking the boxers off and tossing them somewhere behind me. "So forceful," he teased. I glared and practically ripped the boxers from his hips, lowering my head to take his cock in my mouth. A broken moan fell from his mouth and I smirked. "U-unfair advantage," he gasped.

"Hmmm," I agreed, and he moaned again at the vibrations. I didn't linger particularly long there, moving up to kiss him deeply. "You were saying something?"

We kissed again, Mello breaking away after a minute to slither downwards and return the favor, though it lasted much longer than his had. In the back of my mind I worried about choking him since he was under me, but he slipped up the bed before it happened. "Had to get you lubed up," he stated pleasantly.

I blinked, staring at him blankly. "Wait, what?"

He gave me a small smile. "I want you to take me."

I sat up slowly. "Mello, if this is about what Nick was saying…"

He followed me quickly. "It has nothing to do with him," he insisted. "I just, I want this."

"You never bottom, Mello. You never have," I said dubiously.

He was blushing slightly. "Well, I want to with you. I trust you."

A new kind of warmth filled me at that statement. "Are you sure?" I asked hesitantly.

He rolled his eyes. "Matt, I take you all the time and you're fine. I think I can handle it."

I leaned in, pressing my lips to his. "Okay." I lowered him to the bed, slight nerves filling me. I had never done this before. Sure, I'd been there when Mello did it and I understood the general idea behind it, but I didn't want to hurt him. I tried to let myself relax and let my body do whatever it wanted. We continued kissing, hands drifting to every crevice of each other's bodies, and by the time I grabbed the lube I was ready to burst. I needed to be inside him. These touches were killing me.

Seeing as how until now I had always bottomed, I knew how painful it could be and vowed to be very careful with Mello. I prepared him gently, stretching him as much as he needed before positioning myself at his entrance. He looked nervous, but nodded, and I slowly entered, wincing at his gasp of pain. "I'm sorry Mello. It will get better, I promise."

Guilt swept through me when I saw tears gathering at the corner of his eyes. "It better," was the breathless reply, "because if this is all you've felt every time we've had sex I'm going to feel really fucking guilty."

I leaned down, kissing his lips carefully. "Just relax. It will be better once you relax," I promised him. It was hard to think, feeling him around me, and he was so tight I almost couldn't bear it, but slowly his muscles began to loosen, and finally he was relaxed. "You okay?" I asked. "You ready?"

He simply nodded and I started moving, slowly at first, until I saw the pain melt away to pleasure on Mello's face. Then I began to pick up the pace, hands gripping his hips. I was urged on by his moans, searching for that one bundle of nerves that would send him flying. I knew instantly I had found it when Mello practically screamed. "Matt," he managed, "there, right there," he said, as if I hadn't noticed. Either way I complied, doing my best to hit that bundle of nerves every time.

Our bodies were growing slick with sweat, the sound of skin slapping skin the only noise in the room. Mello was gasping with every thrust, and seeing him underneath me made me want him more. I was totally swept away by the sensations, and I knew I wouldn't last much longer. I was close, and a final thrust was all that was needed to bring Mello to completion. Feeling his muscles tighten around me was too much, and I moaned his name as I came before sinking down on top of him.

Our breathing sounded loud and harsh in the silent room, and I pulled out, rolling to the side just enough to curl up with him. We're silent for several moments, both catching our breaths, before he speaks. "Wow."

I chuckled weakly, still out of breath. "That's all you can say?"

He laughed too. "I see why you seem to like bottoming, feels good."

I hummed in agreement, eyes closing of their own accord. I forced them open only to see Mello's closed too. "Hey, your parents are going to be home soon."

"Don't care," he mumbled.

"Mello!"

"Can't move," he whined.

My heart clenched in my chest. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you?" I asked anxiously.

"Calm down you freak," he said, wrapping an arm around me to stop me from getting up. "You just exhausted me is all. I'm fine."

"You sure?" I asked.

"Yes, now, let me sleep."

"Mello," I whined. "They're gonna know we were having sex."

"Ugh!" he sat up. "I hate you."

"You're such a liar."

"Yeah, yeah." He rolled out of bed, redressing. We managed to stumble our way downstairs and put on a movie, curling up on the couch. I found my eyes fluttering closed not long into the movie, and vaguely registered the sound of a door closing not long later.

"Sleeping already?"

"Crappy day at work," Mello told them. "He had a bad headache."

"Poor guy," his mom said. "Did he eat anything?"

"He had a sandwich. I think he just needs to sleep it off." And I did nod off, for a while. Eventually I felt Mello nudging me. "Get up, we're going to bed." I grumbled something at him and rolled towards him, burying my face against his chest. "No way am I carrying you anywhere after what you did to me. You should be carrying me." I groaned and forced myself up, staring blearily into Mello's half closed eyes. We slipped upstairs and into bed quickly.

"Love you," I slurred.

"Love you too," he said, voice sleepy. I drifted off, thinking about how lucky I was to have him. I didn't know how I had managed it.

Before I knew it, graduation had arrived. It was a busy week, full of finals and preparations for the big day. All of a sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, we were in the school halls, wearing our caps and gowns. As we lined up I leaned in to adjust his cap. He nudged me, knocking my cap off. I pouted at him and picked it up, hitting him with it. We both laughed. "Can you believe it's really almost over?" I asked.

"Seems like the year just started," he admitted. "But things have changed a lot since then." I nodded, thinking about high school, and how much things had changed, all because I had found Mello. Sure, everything hadn't been perfect, and there had been bumps along the way, but we had got through it. I had lost things over the past year, but Mello, finding out who my true friends are, and ultimately who I was, was definitely worth it.

And maybe Mello and I wouldn't be together forever. Maybe we'd break up in college and go our separate ways, meet new people and build lives without each other. Even if that happened, Mello had given me something I'd take with me all my life. I was no longer afraid of being bi, and I wasn't going to hide who I was from myself or anybody else. I wasn't going to worry about the future. It wouldn't be easy, and it certainly wouldn't be perfect, but it would be worth it. That's what mattered.

But thinking of living without Mello felt legitimately painful, and I didn't want to worry about it. We'd met just this year, and he already was such an important part of my life. Us breaking up for real was just…not an option. Not after all the crap we went through over the year.

I felt someone tackle me from behind and I fell over to the kid in front of me. "Sorry," I gasped out. He shrugged, laughing as Michelle's arms tightened around my throat. "Michelle!" I growled.

She laughed. "Hey, wanna go out to IHOP after the ceremony with Joe and me?" she asked.

"I'm going out with Mello's parents," I told her, turning to give her a quick hug. "Could we go later instead?"

"Yeah," she said excitedly, Joe finally arriving through the throngs of people. "That's okay right?"

"Sure," he said, even though he had missed out on the entire conversation. "Man, I can't believe we're about to graduate."

"I can't decide if I'm happy or sad," Michelle said, eyes bright.

Mello's arm crept around my waist and he grinned. "I'd go with happy."

We chatted spiritedly for several minutes, waiting for the ceremony to start. Since teachers were still wandering around with students not in cap and gown, we still had some time. "Oh, Matt!" Joe said suddenly. "I saw your dad."

I froze. "You what?" Mello's arm tightened around me.

Joe nodded. "Yeah, he's sitting in the stands by the door. I thought you guys weren't talking…you know?"

"Yeah…we're not…" I trailed off, slowly pulling myself from Mello's grasp. "I need to…"

"Go on, we'll be here," Mello reassured. I smiled gratefully and slipped through the crowd quickly, ducking into the gym where the ceremony was taking place. A couple other graduates were mulling around, helping to set up with the teachers. My eyes scanned the stands and after quite a bit of searching, I saw him. I just stared at him and he met my eyes from across the room. I didn't experience a huge catharsis; there were no tears or hugs or even mutual nodding, just our eyes connected for several endless seconds before he looked away. But, it was enough. I doubted I'd ever go home again, and I doubted I'd ever talk to David again. Maybe someday I'd get a call from my dad, or something, but our family was too broken to fix. It always had been.

A teacher told me it was almost time to start so I rushed back to Mello, and not long after, the ceremony began. I walked across the stage and got my diploma, briefly considering how after dealing with school for twelve years, I got about ten seconds on stage and a piece of paper to acknowledge it. It seemed a bit unfair.

As I sat down, listening to the principal give his speech to the graduates, I began thinking about the absolute mess the year had been. So much had grown wrong, and there were so many bad moments. But everything I had gone through, everything I had to endure over my life was worth it.

Because I had found him. Mello had taught me so much. He showed me so many things. He was to blame for the best parts of my life. With him I found out more about myself. I found out not only about love, but that I deserved it. I found out I should not have to be just tolerated, but cared for and appreciated. I had found out that love was love, no matter the race, age, or gender of the person. Love was love, and love was Mello.

Finding Mello is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

"Students, please stand," the senior officer Joey said, prompting all of us to rise from our seats. "Please turn you tassel now." We all did so. "We have now officially become graduates. Thank you." Before he had finished, everyone removed their caps and threw them into the air, laughing and cheering. Still smiling, I turned towards Mello. As the caps fell down around us, I pulled him towards me. Our lips met, and I knew this was our moment. This was the start of an amazing new life. We'd be free of the school, of my family, and of the restrictions of his. We had a glorious summer in front of us, and then college.

Always together, me and him. Me and Mello.

"Thanks for finding me," I said quietly when we pulled apart.

"No…thank you for finding me," he whispered.

We kissed again, and really it did not matter who found who. We had found each other. Our love was something that was meant to be. I knew then, that things were going to be okay. As long as I had Mello, things would be okay.

No…they would be perfect.

/…/…/…/

AN: Oh wow, it's actually done. I can't believe I've finished this. Thank you all so much for reading! And if you'll indulge my ridiculously lengthy AN I would appreciate it XD

This story has meant a lot to me. I've had the idea for a while, and when I started writing it, I was just coming to accept that I was bisexual, so this story is very personal. A lot of Matt's emotions came from my own. I used this story as a kind of outlet, to get out my feelings about homophobia and family and society. I am lucky because overall, everyone I've told is very accepting, but it is not that easy for some people. I think, even us shippers tend to forget how hard it really is to not be straight in this world. People are victims of hate crime and fired for being gay and all these horrible things. This story was intended to be 12 chapters, but a lot of plot developed. Your reactions to this story have moved me. I am so glad that it has touched so many people. I didn't just want some sexy M/M fic, I wanted a story that meant something. You've all been so supportive so thanks to all my reviewers and readers.

I need to give a few special shoutouts to people. First to parasitic, a friend of mine who beta'd the first couple chapters and encouraged me to post, since I was leery of HS AU stories. Second to 0-Kelly-0, my wonderful motivator who would go on MSN and yell at me to write. She kept me going, and she gave me some advice whenever I got stuck. Also to Dlvvanzor, who helped me work through the plot, gave me ideas and dialogue when I got stuck, and read parts of the story I worried over. She is epic. Also to ShinigamiMailJeevas and Miharu is Haruka's Love Child, for giving me plot ideas and helping me out. And lastly to Foxmore and Chaosattractor for being supportive and encouraging. I love you all.

As for UPCOMING PROJECTS, do not expect a new series from me anytime soon. Right now my plan is to write some fun oneshots and just relax. I do have collab plans with 0-Kelly-0 and ShinigamiMailJeevas though. We have plots chosen and I plan to start work with Kelly's collab this month. Plan on seeing it (hopefully) soon! As for Gami, she doesn't upload until a fic is done, so don't hold your breath waiting for that one yet haha. Also, a lot of you have asked about a sequel. I won't rule it out, but I do not have one planned as of now. We'll see if I get any ideas for one.

Alright, I think I am finally done haha. Thank you all so much for reading, and I hoped you all liked the chapter. Have a wonderful holiday and see you when I update a new oneshot!