Disclaimer: I do not own One Tree Hill or any of its characters.
Author's Note: This chapter is kind of a whirlwind of emotions, going from really happy to really sad to out of left field. I hope you guys like this chapter because even though it's kind of all over the place, I like it a lot and not just for the cliffhanger at the end that hopefully you guys like but weren't expecting.
Read and review please! After all, reviews make the world go round!
Broken Hearts and Healing Minds
Chapter 23
Lucas opened his eyes a few hours later, alone. He sat up, wincing as his injured ribs protested the movement, looking for Peyton. He spotted her a few feet away, talking to Dr. Richards. She looked relaxed and not nervous, which Lucas took as a good sign. That meant whoever they were talking about was going to be okay.
They finished up their conversation and Dr. Richards headed to the back again and Peyton walked over to him, a content look on her face.
"You're awake!" she said in surprise. "How're you feeling?"
"Like I've just been run over by an elephant," Lucas said with a slight chuckle. "Who was Dr. Richards talking about?"
"Stephen," Peyton said. "He woke up a couple of minutes ago. He has a huge headache, but he's going to be fine. Thanks to you—I've heard. Dr. Richards told me about how you saved Stephen's life. Nice going; guess you couldn't live without him after all."
Lucas rolled his eyes, glad to find that movement didn't hurt.
"I knew you'd probably do away with me if I let him get squashed by that beam, so I pushed him out from underneath it," he said. He wasn't about to try shrugging—his shoulders were extremely stiff and he didn't want to know what type of pain that'd cause to his ribs.
"No, him I'm pretty sure I'd be just fine living without," Peyton said brightly. "Anyway, Dr. Richards said that he and Haley would be released in a couple of hours. Still no word on Nathan, Brooke, or Tyler though. What happened to Tyler anyway?"
"He got his hand sliced open on a rusted nail. It was swelling pretty badly when we got out of the apartments," Lucas said. "And I think a rat might have bit him at one point. There certainly were a lot of them."
"Yuck," Peyton said wrinkling her nose. "That's disgusting."
"Yeah, it was," Lucas said. He sighed grunting when it made his chest hurt. "How are you doing?"
"Me?" Peyton asked shocked. "Why are you asking about me? I'm not the one that had a run in with a collapsing apartment building yesterday."
"You're the one that had to fly six hours out here at two in the morning," Lucas pointed out. "And haven't slept since."
"I slept a little bit, actually," Peyton admitted. "I was tired and didn't feel like leaving you to go get coffee, so I fell asleep. Sue me."
Lucas smirked, grimacing when it made his face twinge. Peyton gave him a sympathetic smile.
"I'm sorry that you had to be beaten up by those lunatics to get out of there," she said quietly. "Maybe next time you'll learn not to meddle in things that you don't need to be meddling in. Especially after you've had recent heart surgery and your doctor tells you to stay off your knee or you risk not walking for the rest of your life."
Behind that pretty smile, Lucas realized that Peyton was extremely pissed off at him for the nearly suicidal rescue on Nathan. Lucas was pretty upset with himself for getting so many people involved and injured. He should have planned it better or gone with Stephen's suggestion of getting police help. He was being stubborn, he knew, trying to save his brother by himself.
"I never meant to get everyone hurt," he said softly. "I just felt like that if I couldn't save Nathan myself then no one would. He's my brother, you know? I just—I didn't think about what would happen if things went wrong. I've learned my lesson."
"I understand," Peyton said. "Believe me, I understand. You were just trying to help and I love you for being that guy. I just want to kill you myself some times because you were so stupid. Like tackling Ryan and getting pulled into the river—you could have gotten yourself killed! I'm not mad at you; I just want you to think before you act. I can't live without you, Luke. I've tried and failed."
"I know," Lucas whispered as she sat down next to him. He carefully slid an arm around her shoulders. "You don't have to worry about me doing any more near suicidal rescue attempts; I think Nathan learned his lesson the hard way about using drugs to deal with his problems and I don't see you, Brooke, Haley, Stephen, or Tyler doing anything stupid."
"You'd seriously help Stephen or Tyler if they were in trouble?" Peyton asked looking surprised.
"The only reason why I hated Stephen so much to begin with was because he was everything I wanted to be," Lucas said. "And I hated Tyler because of Haley and what she had done to Nathan. But now, after you go through something like yesterday, it's kind of hard not to have a grudging friendship with them."
"Who are you and what have you done with my real boyfriend?" Peyton teased.
"He's sitting right here, he's just different," Lucas said seriously.
Peyton leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. Lucas was pleasantly surprised that this action did not cause his bruises to hurt.
"Brooke Davis?"
An unfamiliar doctor was standing in the doorway. Peyton instantly detached herself from Lucas and stood up.
"I'll be right back," she told him.
"I want to come with you," Lucas protested.
"Stay," she commanded. "You look like Hell. You're going to stay here."
Lucas sighed, knowing that it was for the best. He highly doubted that he could stand up right now, much less walk. He still hated feeling so helpless though.
"I'll be right back," she promised kissing his forehead before walking away. Lucas watched as she walked toward the doctor before sighing.
"Nathan Scott?"
Peyton was busy talking to Brooke's doctor when Doctor Lane came out. The doctor was a young woman with blonde hair and dark blue eyes. Lucas recognized her instantly from back when he had had heart surgery—she had been assisting his cardiologist incase anything went wrong.
Doctor Lane spotted him instantly and walked over to him. She looked exhausted, but not too worried. Apparently whatever news she had was going to be good.
"Hey, Lucas," she greeted him. "How are you holding up?"
"I'll be doing better if I know my brother is okay," Lucas said though not unkindly. He couldn't stand small talk—it made him nervous.
"Nathan's going to need a lot of help and support through the next couple of months," Dr. Lane said. "But he ought to be just fine, so long as he stays off the drugs and doesn't overdo it with his shoulder. I managed to avoid doing surgery on it, but he'll be slower to heal without it. No basketball for at least six weeks, and even then, take it slow. You Scott brothers are known for your idiocy when it comes to basketball, so know that if Nathan overdoes it he can lose full use of that shoulder for good, which means no basketball ever again."
"No offense, doc, but every time someone tells us that, they turn out to be wrong," Lucas pointed out. "I mean, look at me."
"Yeah, and you look like serious hell right now too," Dr. Lane shot back. "Have Nathan take it easy or I swear I'm going to make him go through with that surgery and it'll be twice as painful."
"All right, all right!" Lucas said. "I will. But just so you know, Nathan's more stubborn than I am."
"I doubt that," Dr. Lane scoffed. "I don't think anyone is as stubborn as you are. Anyway, I've got to get back to work. I'll send a nurse out to take you up to Nathan's room in a little while if you feel up to it. He should be okay to be released in tomorrow. Just remember, no drugs, okay? You can always take him to Briarwood if you don't think you can handle him by yourself."
"Okay," Lucas said. "Thanks, Dr. Lane."
The doctor nodded before standing up again and walking away. Peyton came back a few minutes later, looking extremely upset.
"Brooke had a miscarriage," she said sadly. "She lost the baby. The stress became too much for her and the baby was still in the most important stages of growth."
Lucas felt tears sting the back of his eyes as Peyton took a seat next to him sighing heavily.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. "This is my fault. All of it. She shouldn't have been there in the first place. She wouldn't have been if I hadn't dragged Haley and Stephen over there. God, I'm such a selfish jackass!"
"Lucas, it is not your fault Brooke had a miscarriage," Peyton said firmly but gently. "You are not to blame for this, okay? You couldn't have known that she was coming. Like you told me earlier, you didn't know that she and Tyler were coming. It was a freak accident, Luke. There was nothing you could have done."
"I should have done something," Lucas said self-deprecatingly. "Anything!"
"This isn't about Brooke losing her baby, is it?" Peyton asked unhappily. "You're blaming yourself for Nathan taking drugs, aren't you?"
"I should have noticed that he was acting differently," Lucas said wretchedly. "I should have been a better brother. I should have been able to help him. But I couldn't. And now, Brooke lost her baby, Nathan lost his scholarship to play basketball at Duke, his dream school, and I'm to blame for all of this."
"How many times must I go through this conversation with you idiotic Scott brothers?" Peyton demanded. "You two are so ready to blame yourselves that you don't even realize that it might not have been your fault after all, that sometimes the other person just doesn't want help and that you could have done nothing about it! Sometimes, people have miscarriages, especially if they're eighteen years old and aren't ready for a baby! Sometimes it's not your fault! Shit happens, okay? And you can't blame yourself for everything that happens or otherwise, you're going to start affecting the people around you and making them miserable too. So please, just accept for once that none of this was your fault. Please."
Lucas could hardly bring himself to look in those tearful green eyes, because he knew that she was right. But he still felt that he should have been able to do something. And nothing she could say would take that feeling away. He had messed up as a brother for not noticing the signs sooner and he would never forgive himself for that.
"I know, Peyton, that there was probably nothing I could do," he said softly. "But I still feel as though there was something I should have done."
"What could you have done, Luke?" Peyton asked her voice softer now as well. She didn't wait for a reply. "You have a choice to make right now. You can either grieve for what you could have done, or you can accept the fact that some things are beyond even the famous Lucas Scott's control and work on fixing what's happening now. Don't live in the past, Luke. Live in the present and work for the future. Dwelling in the past only brings about heartache."
"Who are you and have you done with my real girlfriend?" Lucas asked smiling weakly. "You sound just like my mother, you know that? She was always saying things like that."
"Your mother was right, Lucas," she said quietly. "Both Nathan and Brooke are going to need you if they're going to get through these next few months before graduation. We're all going to need you. And you're going to need all of us."
"What would I do without you?" Lucas asked with another smile. This one had some real feeling behind it.
"I don't know. Crash and burn maybe," Peyton said with a grin. "No matter what happens next, I will always be here for you. Remember that."
"I love you," he whispered.
"And I love you too," she whispered back.
Nathan felt as though someone was attempting to drive a jackhammer through his shoulder as he slowly came to. The feeling was only made worse when a blinding pain in his head made itself known, threatening to send him back into unconsciousness.
"Hey, Nathan," he heard someone murmur.
It sounded a lot like Lucas, someone Nathan thought he'd never talk to again. He distantly remembered the hallway collapsing after he, Brooke, Tyler, and Haley had made it through the opening. Lucas had been trapped along with Stephen, he remembered. Tyler had gone back to try to save them. Nathan didn't remember whether or not they had made it out okay—he guessed he had blacked out or something. But he did remember Brooke telling him that she was going into labor. He wondered if she was okay and hoped that she was.
"Come on, Nate," Lucas's voice begged. "Open your eyes."
Nathan felt as though his brother was asking the impossible. His eyelids felt as though they had been super glued shut. And if he thought his headache was bad with his eyes closed, he didn't want to know what it was like with the lights on and his eyes open.
"Luke, Dr. Roberts wants to check your knee again," another person said. The voice sounded like Peyton's, which made even less sense than Lucas's. As far as Nathan knew, Peyton was no friend of his, especially after he had run her over and didn't apologize. Why were both of them in his room? What was going on?
"Dr. Roberts can wait," Lucas said hoarsely. He sounded as though he had been crying, which shocked Nathan more than anything else. His brother rarely cried. Something must have been wrong. But what?
"Lucas, you need to take care of yourself," a third person spoke up. Nathan felt his breath catch in his throat when he heard it. Haley, he thought with a mental sigh of relief. She had made it. Nathan felt as though he could sing, if only he could make his voice cooperate. Haley was alive and she was there!
"I'm fine," Lucas snapped angrily. He sounded as though he had had this conversation with them before.
"Haley's right," Peyton said gently. "You need to look after yourself before you look after Nathan and Brooke."
Brooke. The name struck a feeling of discord throughout the room. Nathan didn't have to have his eyes open to know that Lucas was feeling guilty about something involving the brunette girl.
"I'll have Dr. Roberts look at it in a little while," Lucas conceded. "After I know that Nathan is okay."
That's an ultimatum if I've ever heard one, Nathan thought dryly. It was so Lucas though.
"You don't know when that could be," Haley protested.
Good old Haley, always trying to be logical, he thought.
"Hales," Peyton cautioned.
There was something going on here, Nathan realized again. Something that had upset Lucas greatly and that's why the conversation the three of them were having was like walking on eggshells. Nathan wanted desperately to open his eyes and demand what the hell was going on.
"It's fine, Peyton," Lucas said resignedly. "Haley's right. But he's my brother and after everything that's happened between us, I think I owe it to him to be there for him when he wakes up, don't you?"
"No," Peyton said rather bluntly. "I've told you before, Lucas, you don't owe anyone anything. Nathan especially."
"Gee, thanks."
Nathan surprised everyone, himself included, when he forced his eyes open and managed to get his voice to work. He saw Lucas sitting in the hospital chair to his left, looking as though he had gone ten rounds with a block of cement and lost. Haley was sitting in a wheelchair beside him, looking slightly better, though Nathan couldn't help but notice the long gash that stretched from her temple to her chin and the brilliantly white cast on her wrist. Peyton stood behind both of them, arms crossed over her chest, looking as though she had been the one that beat up everyone in the room and was ready to do it again. Nathan couldn't help but smirk at the Peyton Sawyer bitch-face, even though it was directed at him.
Lucas's face brightened considerably when he realized that Nathan was awake and that it wasn't just a dream. He looked relieved, but at the same time, his eyes were guarded and suspicious. Nathan didn't blame him; if roles had been reversed, he would have acted the same way. In fact, he had acted the same when Lucas had been the one with the drug problem.
Peyton's scowl lessened and there was something resembling a smile on her face. Nathan knew his friend well enough to know that she was still pretty upset, but Nathan's awakening definitely helped cheer her up.
Haley broke into a full blown grin as she let out a squeak of excitement.
"Nathan!" she exclaimed looking as though she were about ready to jump out of the wheelchair and give him a hug. "How are you feeling? Are you okay? Of course you're not okay, you have a chunk of wood pulled out of your shoulder after a building fell on top of you. But you look okay, well for a person that has been through hell. You look better than Lucas, that's for sure."
"Thanks, Hales," Lucas said with an eye roll.
"Hey, it's just fact," Haley retorted. "Anyway, I'm so glad you're awake. We thought you weren't going to because you had a pretty massive concussion and though Dr. Lane said that you'd be fine, none of us really believed it because you have the Scott family curse of getting a simple injury and then having it blown out of proportion because you overdo it. Of course, it's kind of hard to overdo it when you're in a hospital bed, but you never know. You and Lucas are crazy prone to accidents. I mean it's seriously a Ripley's Believe It or Not thing that you two are still alive."
Nathan wondered if she had always talked this much or she was just doing it because she was anxious and relieved at the same time. He didn't care—it was good to hear her voice again after months of silence. It made him feel whole again.
He had a sneaking suspicion that she would have gone on for a while longer, but Peyton let out a huge cough and she immediately fell silent, looking slightly abashed.
"Sorry," she mumbled. "I'm just really glad that you're awake and are going to be okay."
"Me too," Nathan said. "I mean, I'm glad you're awake and okay."
Haley looked away, but not before Nathan could see the soft smile on her face and the tears in her beautiful brown eyes.
"Lucas, you should probably get that knee looked at now," Peyton said. "Nathan's awake and he's obviously okay, so you need to take care of yourself."
Nathan wondered why Peyton was mothering Lucas so much. Yes, his brother looked like he had been through Hell and back complete with dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep, bruises covering most of his face, and oversized clothing, but he had looked worse before and managed to survive without that much attention.
"You're probably right," Lucas murmured.
That surprised Nathan more than Peyton's mothering. The fact that Lucas was letting her do it made Nathan sense that something was wrong, something none of them were telling him.
"I'm always right," Peyton teased. "Now come on, let's go before Dr. Roberts has a conniption looking for you. The poor doc might think you have another idiot of a brother that's addicted to drugs and you had to go rescue him from a collapsed building as well."
Nathan winced as her words hit him. She was really pissed at him, though she was attempting to put on a good face for Lucas. She really loves him, he noted. And he must really love her if he's allowing her to get away with all of this.
"On that note, I better get you out of here before you try to kill my idiot of a brother," Lucas joked. He turned to Nathan. "Seriously, if you do anything like that ever again, I'll let the building finish the job. Okay?"
Nathan nodded. Although the words were threatening, he heard the concern and brotherly love behind them.
Lucas stood slowly, like an old man with arthritis. Peyton stood by, ready to be of help if he needed it. Nathan was about to ask what was going on when he saw the knee brace on Lucas's knee and instantly understood. The idiot, he thought. Always putting others before himself. How could I have not remembered that Lucas will stop at nothing to save someone he cares about? Oh right. Drugs. I have got to stop doing those.
"You're going to be okay, right Luke?" Nathan asked unable to keep the tremor of fear and worry out of his voice. He knew that he wouldn't be able to get through this without his brother. He needed his brother to be there if he wanted to kick this drug addiction.
"I'll be fine," Lucas promised. He took a couple of steps away from the bed. Peyton put a comforting hand on his shoulder.
"You'll come back later?" Nathan questioned. He didn't know why he was being so clingy, but he really wanted his brother back.
"Yeah, I will," Lucas assured him with a soft smile. He touched Haley's shoulder as he limped by. Haley looked up and nodded about something Lucas had whispered. Then, he and Peyton had left the room, leaving Haley and Nathan alone for the first time in months.
"I've got a confession," Haley said quietly, turning back to face him. Nathan looked at her imploringly. "I've been denying this for a very long time so I wouldn't hurt Tyler, but after what happened yesterday at Oak Ridge and what happened to Brooke with the miscarriage and all made me realize that life is really short."
"Brooke had a miscarriage?" Nathan questioned shocked beyond belief.
Haley looked guilty.
"I guess we kind of forgot to mention that," she said. "Yes, she had a miscarriage. She lost the baby and she's been in a dark place ever since she found out about it. In case you didn't notice, Lucas has been taking it really hard. He's been blaming himself for what happened."
Nathan nodded, understanding instantly. It explained why Peyton had been overprotective of him.
"Anyway, that's not what I was going to tell you," Haley said looking nervous again. "As I said, life is really short. Too short to deny the sorts of things that people spend all their lives looking for when you have it right in front of you."
"Haley, would you stop beating around the bush and tell me what's on your mind?" Nathan asked with a soft smile. He couldn't help but find her adorable when she got nervous and started babbling like the way she was now.
"This is going to be a really big shock to you, Nathan," she cautioned. "Or maybe not. I mean, everyone else has been saying that we still are, even though we've been denying it."
"Hales?"
"Sorry. What I'm trying so hard to say is that I love you. I'm in love with you. I don't think I ever stopped. Turning down your proposal was the worst mistake of my life, Nathan, and I understand if you don't feel the same about me. But I want you to know, I love you."