Author's Note: Et voila! Another chapter. Let me know what you think about this one! I definitely have at least one more chapter coming out. I only have one more written, but the way my writing/editing generally goes, that could easily turn into two or three. Thank you all for your support, it's really amazing to me.
Within five minutes Warner has acquired a tank. Collapsed on a seat beside him, I direct Warner back through the streets I tore through last night, struggling to recall the twists and turns I made in my haste. All the soldiers cleared out quickly, but they left their mark. Boot prints preserved in mud, any remaining windows shattered, and any remnants of civilization dragged out and trampled in the streets. When I passed through this community the first time, with Kenji, I thought the scene was as heartbreaking as it could get. I was wrong.
The morning is finally light, the sunrise spreading across the horizon. I realize I've come to live sunrise to sunrise. Each one promises new things, and a new chance to make a change. This one gives me the most hope of all. The sun has finally risen above the buildings. It is casting its strong light on the ruined Earth. Steam rises gently from the ground, as if the sun has had enough of the rain and the carnage. The dirt at the edge of the road is returning to a light brown, but the yards are still puddled with water. The leaves are perking back up, no longer being pelted and held down by water. The sun is reflecting off of everything, leaving spots in my vision.
"It's going to be a lovely day," Warner says conversationally.
"It better be," I reply. "It rained enough last night to last me a lifetime." I emphasize this last point by squeezing the water out of my shirt. We are both sitting in puddles, the rain water streaming off of us, though Warner is significantly drier than I.
"I would offer again, but-"
"I would say no. Tempting as your offer is, the last thing I need is to hear Kenji's smartass comments first thing this morning."
Warner keeps offering me his suit coat, which somehow managed to stay dry underneath his jacket. My heart aches to take it. I am sick of being cold, and I feel swept up in his kindness. It is unlike anything I have ever known. Adam was sweet, but it was hard for him to make grand gestures like this. Kenji always told me to suck it up when I was cold. Or made other, more suggestive, suggestions.
And Aaron….
Aaron was always about his duty, and I was always pushing him away. I still have my doubts sometimes, but only now do I realize just how strongly I longed for him while on the run. Maybe out here...we can be different. Maybe he will open up and I will relax and we can both be free. We can both find our birds.
But, I interrupt myself, Kenji is already unbearable. No need to fuel that fire.
I smile to myself when I think of my best friend. I miss him already. The night had been a long one without his ever-excited presence.
Warner fails to understand the attraction. His knuckles turn white on the steering wheel and his right hand reaches for my clammy left. God, I missed this.
"He'll learn to watch his mouth now that I am around."
"He's not that bad," I say, trying to diffuse the situation. "I need someone to pick on me every now and then."
Warner nods his head and lets the moment pass, his knuckles returning to a normal skin color. To my satisfaction, his hand remains in mine. His fingers are so warm around mine. I'm so glad he left his gloves behind. And mine.
Then, without any warning, my mouth makes a decision my brain did not approve.
"I missed you, Aaron."
I keep my eyes locked on the road, hardly believing that these words just escaped my lips. For a moment I want to bow my head in shame, my old self-deprecating habits coming back to me. I want to count. 10 fingers, 20 including the ones laced in mine, seven colors in the rainbows that are appearing everywhere- Then I remember how much I've changed, how much I've gone through in these last few days. It's time to be honest with myself. In order to want better things for the world, I need to first want better things for myself. And I do.
This one sentence is a small step, but one that somehow reconciles our past. I am able, for the first time, to compartmentalize our time together. I can smile at Warner's closet full of dresses just for me. I can bury myself in the memory of him doing my hair. I think back to my fear when I realized that I could touch him without consequence. Even our awkward, rushed, sleep-deprived kiss makes me smile. Pride in how far I've come is like a warm blanket. It engulfs me, puts me at peace with myself, shields me from the storm to come.
My eyes find Aaron sitting completely still, trying to tame a dopey smile. His eyes blaze in the morning light and I wish I could trap their color. I wish I could use it to paint over everything that is wrong with the world. My eyes flash to a ring on his finger, detailed in the same color. I touch it playfully, moving it in circles around his finger, passing the seconds before he responds.
He squeezes my hand, " I missed you, too, love."
The smile on my face matches his for a split second before I realize where we are.
"Turn here, then stop in front of this house." I blurt out as we nearly pass the turn off.
Warner follows my directions. I hazard a glance at the face of the house, second guessing my memory. Everything looks so different in the day. I know it is the right one, though, and we both jump out. I lead him through the weeds. I do my best to hold the branches out of his way, but he's so tall most of them hit him anyway. We each end up with our share of scratches by the time we get through the foliage.
In a sudden, playful mood, Aaron dives forward just as I am about to make my way through the ankle-deep mud. He scoops me up into his arms and carries me over the puddles and toward the car. He spins us around, causing bubbles of laughter to emerge from my stomach. My hair whirls out around us, glimmering in the sunlight. He finally sets me down next to the vehicle, my dizziness causing me to lean heavily on his chest. The laughter continues. Warner even releases a few laughs of his own. It's so nice to see him off base, where he can finally be himself…
"Juliette? Is that you?" A small voice causes me to spin around rapidly. My head whirls and Warner has to put his hands on my waist to steady me. James' face is sticking out of a window in the back seat of the beat up car. Through the front window, I can see Adam, still sleeping, in the passenger seat. I greet James with a small smile, wondering if he got any sleep last night. The circles under his eyes are concerning.
"It's about damn time-" comes Kenji's familiar drawl. His eyes nearly pop out of his skull when he registers our closeness. A blush springs to my cheeks.
"Well, well, well," he says, "What do we have here?" His eyes venture downward to my suspiciously tattered clothing. I consider explaining just how I tore them, but I know it's futile.
My heart fills with joy at the sight of them all, safe. I step away from Warner, moving to rouse Adam. Aaron reluctantly releases my waist. He crosses his arms over his chest in a move that I know too well. He isn't amused by my choice in friends. Maneuvering my way around the car, I pull on the handle, but Kenji leans across and holds the door shut. "What's the rush, princess? He can sleep for just a second longer…"
That cocky smile in full view now, my mind races to come up with a smart response. I even consider slapping him, just a little, but, upholding his promise from earlier, Warner beats me to it.
"Kishimoto!"
Kenji's head snaps to Warner, his body tries to come to attention before he realizes he's been betrayed by his own reflexes. Warner quirks his mouth into a smile of his own and says, "Let the girl be."
Kenji climbs almost drunkenly out of the car, hopefully the result of some much-needed sleep.
"Well, I see you haven't changed, Warner." He turns to me, "Princess, are you certain we need this guy?"
"Considering 'this guy' is saving our collective ass, I would say yes, we do."
I shake Adam awake while Kenji stretches his limbs, finally out of comments. James hops out of the car and into the sticky mud. It sucks at his shoes and he crumples his nose at it. Then, just as Adam clears his eyes, the world moves in slow motion before mine. James tries to unstick his shoes, an act that throws him off balance. He lurches forward into a splintery fence at the edge of the yard. Before I can command Warner to catch him, James brings his hand down. Directly onto a nail. I can practically hear the skin tearing, hear his heart pumping his blood out. James' breath catches. Quickly, Warner helps him regain his balance. Blood drips off his hand and into the grass. The gash is an inch and a half long and dizzyingly deep. I want to cry.
In an instant, Warner's authoritative voice takes over, "We have to take him back to the truck. There are medical supplies there."
I can see him working through every scenario already. He is accounting for a potential infection, deciding if the boy will need stitches, and has almost scooped him off his feet.
"No! Don't worry about it." James smiles, eager to reassure us. The four of us just stare with horrified faces. The smile flickers out and his eyebrows crease. James' brain is moving a million miles an hour to understand our concern, and we are doing just the opposite. Unsure of how to proceed, he locks eyes with Warner.
"Hi!" He says jovially. "My name is James." He thrusts out a hand covered in dried blood, completely forgetting the injury marring it.
Warner gasps at the sight before him. Lightning fast, his hands reach out and grasp James' tiny one. James grunts a little.
"Hey!"
From somewhere over my shoulder Adam is surging forward, demanding that Warner unhand his little brother. Kenji is remaking that he knew Warner hadn't changed, despite his complete trust in him last night. My mind is already trying to mediate the situation. Unfortunately, one tiny girl is no match for three soldiers.
Before any of us can get to him, Warner angles James' hand toward us, saying, "Look!"
We all rush forward, expecting the worst. Adam has pushed Aaron out of the way, Kenji is standing over his shoulder, and I am forgotten entirely. The mud sucks me down, but Aaron pulls me back out. Shoving Kenji out of my way, I find myself face to face with a very confused 10-year-old, and a flabbergaster Adam. Finally, my eyes lock on the astonishing sight. James has a tiny, pink, slightly scabbed scar lining the center of his palm. It looks like he cut it months ago. I grasp his clothed arm as gently as I can in my panic and flip it over, searching desperately for the injury. There is blood everywhere, some dried, some still dripping from his fingertips, but all flowing from the scar on his palm. He was bleeding profusely just seconds ago. And now he is entirely healed.
"Jesus Christ!" Kenji exclaims. Adam shoves him in response.
"What? I told you not to worry about it." James looks from his palm up to our faces. His lips tremble a little, trying to figure out why we look like he just invented fire.
"This doesn't happen to you guys?"
"Hell, no!" Kenji exclaims, earning him another dirty glance from Adam. "Sonya and Sara and going to adore you, kid."
"Who?"
"James," Adam butts in, "Have you always healed like this?"
"Not always. I've been getting better at it. What's going on?"
My mind whirls. Pieces of information fly by my head all at once. Some are memories, some are things I discovered for myself throughout the years. I remember the first time I caused someone pain. It was my mother. It was just a little shock, but it got me locked in my room. By the time I was forgiven, I had gained enough strength to kill a small child. And then I did. It developed over time, always present, but not always strong. Never within my control, but always there for me to use. This is it. I'm not nearly as alone in this world as I thought.
"James has a power."
The astonishment returns again, this time centering on me. "This is how it started with me. I had a few incidents here and there, never quite sure what was happening. Then, after the day at the supermarket, it was always there, right under my skin."
"Will someone tell me what's going on?" James' voice is childlike again. He must be terrified. I know I was. All those doctors, all those police officers, all of them talking about me as if I were an animal and not a human being. Poor James. I lean down to comfort him, I intend to explain what is happening and to tell him it is a good thing, but I loose the words before my mouth can form them. Adam and Warner are at a similar loss for words. Adam looks dumbfounded, amazed that he has known his brother all his life and never realized he has a gift.
He makes eye contact with me, his thoughts racing. "I had no idea."
"There was no way you could have. Don't worry," I say, my hand on his shoulder, "it seems his ability is the exact opposite of mine. He'll be just fine."
Adam nods, but his jaw remains set.
Kenji springs into action. He pats James on the shoulder, "Don't worry, James. It's a good thing." Then, under his breath, "It's a freaking awesome thing."
"We'd better get going," Warner says, holding out his hand to help me across the mud.
Adam slings James across his shoulders, eyes his bloodied hand suspiciously. Kenji, Adam, and James lead the way out of the yard. We return to the tank, squeezing ourselves into the small space. Kenji, refusing to tell us where we are going, takes the wheel. I can see the apprehension in Warner's eyes, but I lean against him inside the tank and I can feel his heart slow.
My eyes begin to fall closed. Of all of us, Warner and I have been awake the longest, and Warner tends to go days without sleep anyway. My body finally relaxes, my weight falling into Warner's side. His arm wraps around my waist, his head falling onto mine.
"So we haven't been introduced yet," James' voice warbles through the silence. I can only imagine he's talking to Warner. I try my best to stay awake for the conversation.
"No, I don't believe we have." Warner's chest vibrates ever so slightly under my ear. I wish he would say more. The timbre of his voice is putting me to sleep better than any medicine in the world.
"My name is James."
"Most people call me Warner. It's nice to meet you, James."
I can feel them shake hands, careful not to disturb me.
"So you can touch her?"
All the eyes in the tank find us. Too exhausted to provide an explanation, I let Aaron field the question. My eyes remain closed, my head against his chest. Adam shifts on the floor, trying not to seem interested. This information should be news to Kenji, but, for once, he remains quiet.
Warner runs a finger along my arm as if to prove James' observation, "Yes, I can."
"How did you find out?"
Now Aaron chuckles.
"I asked her to touch me," he says simply. I can hear Adam stiffen, clench his jaw. I feel for him, but cannot find the strength in me to change the conversation.
James, on the other hand, seems utterly fascinated, "You just asked her to? Weren't you scared?"
"Terrified," Aaron says, adding more fingers to the one on my bicep. I can hear the smile in his voice. I so desperately want to give him one in return. "You'd have to be in my position to understand. It was rather a….tense moment."
Kenji snorts from the front seat, making me jump a little. Warner's arms soothe me, and soon enough I can barely understand the words being said around me. James misses Kenji's insinuation entirely.
"Are you two dating? I thought she was dating Adam..." He asks, careful with his wording.
"James." Adam's voice suddenly makes its way into the conversation.
James' question is so abrupt I almost open my eyes. Surely they would know I'm awake by my blush anyway. I can feel Warner stiffen next to me. God knows I wouldn't want to answer this question were I in his shoes, but… something in me is begging him not to ignore it.
"Sorry," James says, that childish whine sneaking into his voice. I forget, sometimes, just how young he is. He's growing up before my eyes. I feel so proud of him, just having known him for this short time. Adam must be amazed with his transformation.
"That's alright," Warner says before falling silent again. For a moment I worry that he won't answer. I am just about to pack away in my mind so I can remember it for later, when he begins again.
"I don't suppose either of us know," he says, much quieter now. "I'm rather taken with her, but she is so...unpredictable. I couldn't begin to guess how she feels," Warner's fingers begin to play absently with my hair. The movement makes my entire scalp tingle. It takes every part of my being to keep my face indifferent. "As for her and your brother, you'll have to ask him about that."
Adam grunts, irritated that he's been dragged into this.
"Wow, James. It seems you've caught blondie in a good mood. Don't expect him to be this nice all the time." Kenji wriggles, his seat making a horrible noise against his soaked pants.
Warner's laughter rumbles through him. "He can, actually. You, Kishimoto? You cannot."
They all share a laugh before the silence takes over. The sound of the tank over gravel and Aaron's heartbeat put me to sleep immediately.