Chapter 25: Eureka

Cambria

I almost felt as if I was losing my place in Brian's family. I couldn't ask it of him to leave them, even for me. A dog is desperately loyal to their family, no matter how good or bad they are. So, I was left with one last option to redeem myself: give Brian a family of his own.

I had been barren for… well, I'm not sure how long I was barren for except for the fact I never got pregnant. Through testing, it was concluded I was incapable of having children. I had put the subject away and counted it as a blessing, a freedom to be with whoever and not have to worry about the commitment involved with having a child or two. Now that I had a relationship to work toward though, I was back on the case. It did not help my confidence when I learned young Stewie had given Brian children… that made me more determined than ever to do it. (One of the children had managed to escape being put down, but the pet store could not tell me the whereabouts of the escaped pup.)

A few days after the spat between Stewie, Brian, and I, I finally smelled intervention entering the basement. "I am sorry for my rash actions; now, please, go," I said quickly.

"Look, Cambria, you two are my greatest friends. Couldn't you at least try to get along?" asked Brian.

I rolled my eyes while looking in my microscope. I turned around and said, "Fine. What do you want? Do you want us to shake hands?"

"What's the rush for? Can't you admit that you were wrong?" asked Stewie.

"I did, several times." I sighed. "Look, I'm busy on a project and I'd like to get back to it. I swear I'm on the verge of a breakthrough here," I said.

"Oh, well, maybe Stewie could help you on that," said Brian, pushing the tyke forward.

I stepped in the way. "Respectfully, I'd like to do this project by myself. If I want a second opinion, I'll ask. Furthermore, I'd sooner go to Stewie to gossip about you," I said with a wink.

"Oh, yeah," Stewie said with some laughter.

"What? What have you two been talking about?" asked Brian.

"Nothing important, Brian," I said slyly.

Stewie came to my side and whispered in my ear. I laughed and Brian looked torn up about it. "This is nice. We ought to do this more often," said Stewie.

"Yes, over a bottle of wine," I said with a small laugh. Stewie began heading upstairs and I knew the problems of the past were behind us.

"So… what do you two talk about?" asked Brian.

"Wouldn't you like to be a fly on the wall for our conversations?" I said with a smile. "Well, enough of that. I have work to do."

It was well into the evening before finally I had my eureka moment. I had been in the basement when I had said 'Eureka,' and I had said it loud enough to attract the attention of the whole family upstairs. They came downstairs wondering what the commotion was about.

"Brian, congratulate me, for I have done it," I said excitedly.

"Done what?" asked Brian.

"This formula will cause me to become fertile enough to have children," I said.

Most of the family was excited, except for Brian. "But… what about your deal with Death's Dog? He'll just take them away after their first year," he said.

"I have a way out of everything I get into, Brian, trust me," I said.

"Cambria… I do trust you. I just don't want to commit myself to something I'm gonna lose."

"Come here." I waved him over to my microscope. I explained to him my plan and he smiled a little. Though I couldn't provide much, I could provide, at least, a small comfort.

So, for a few nights, we tried to make the formula work. After I was sore from all the trials, we went back to our normal routine. Honestly, I wasn't entirely sure if it would work. The math was solid and the formula seemed correct, but I couldn't know until it happened.

A few weeks later, I took a pregnancy test. I was on pins and needles waiting for Brian to come home to tell him the news. I had made dinner that evening and when Brian came home, I could tell he was suspicious immediately.

"Are we gonna be put down?" he asked.

"No, Brian, of course not," I said. "Right?"

"No, yeah, right," said Peter. I could tell he was hiding something from me. Right…

"Come on, sit down. We made your favorite, steak," I said enticingly.

"No, seriously, what happened?" he asked.

"Guess," I said while slipping the pregnancy test to him under one of my hands.

"Did someone die?"

"No."

"I don't-" he saw my hand over something, so he removed my hand. His eyes widened at the positive result. "Are you- are we?"

"Yes." He laughed with joy and picked me up and spun me around. "This is so great, Cambria!" He kissed me and I could tell he was as excited about this as I was. "How long?"

"We'll have to wait the same amount of time a human does, unfortunately. If my theories are correct, I'll begin to get irritable shortly after the first two months since dogs aren't supposed to bear for longer than nine weeks."

"Well, this is great news." Brian was all-smiles. He led me to my seat and helped me sit down. From that evening onward, he was babying me. He must have felt the slightest difficulty could shatter our children and/or I. It made me a little concerned about how he would treat the children once they came into the world. Perhaps I could use someone who knew how he treated children to better understand this. I decided to have a talk with his son, Dylan.

Brian

I was so excited to find out that Cambria was pregnant. It gave me a whole new faith on her abilities in science. It almost made me think she was smarter than Stewie… but then again, she hadn't exactly done everything Stewie had done (to my knowledge). I would finally have children of my own that I had actually planned for. Dylan and the kids between Stewie and I were not planned by both mother and father, but Cambria and I had tried and gotten a chance. I was not gonna let it go to waste.

It surprised me when I came home to find the family gathered, along with Dylan and his mother (who was slowly beginning to look better). "What did I do now?" I asked. It was a natural question.

"We were just talking about you, Brian. Come, sit," said Cambria.

I sat next to her on the couch; she was on my left, Dylan at my right. "Look, if this has anything to do with the children, I-" I began.

"Have everything under control," Cambria finished. "I understand. I just wanted to know a bit more about your history is all."

"Oh." I was relieved, but I felt like there was more to this. "But?"

"You have a tendency to, um…" Cambria snapped her fingers, trying to find the right word.

"Overcompensate?" asked Dylan.

"That was the word I was looking for, but now that it's been said out loud, it sounds almost exaggerative," said Cambria.

"Exaggerative? You should have seen Brian when he took care of Dylan. He became the overprotective, perfect father. It was sickening," said Lois.

"Yeah, and you should have seen Brian when he became a Republican. He takes suggestion way too far," said Meg.

"Oh, this was a bashing Brian party? I was not made aware of this," said Stewie, who had been wearing a t-shirt with a picture of me on it.

"What are you saying? I may have gone overboard in the past, but I'm gonna control myself this time," I said.

"I don't doubt that, Brian. I just wanted to know," said Cambria.

"It's like you don't trust me," I said.

"I do trust you, Brian. I'm just weighing out all the variables," said Cambria. "Okay, we need to slow down a little bit, because if this escalates any further, I might throw up."

I took a deep breath. "All right, Cambria. I understand. I'll try to tone it down a little."

We spent a few months trying to find the perfect balance between being too much and ignoring each other. She wound up, during another headache-giving fight, telling me to be as I was. In other words, she didn't want me to be anything less than who I was.

It was an enjoyable experience to be a father to-be. It's amazing to watch the mother of your children carry them and to watch the children grow. It was much less awkward to go out with Cambria and take pictures with her than it had been with Stewie.

In the last month of Cambria's pregnancy, we all went on vacation together. We were down in Florida, enjoying the rays of the sun and the beach. We couldn't really afford anything other than the beach and we certainly didn't want to offer any suggestions (seeing as how compulsive Peter and Chris were). Despite that, it was nice.

Then, as often happens in our lives, disaster struck. Cambria wasn't due for several days yet, but she looked ready to go any instant. She sat under an umbrella and occasionally came out with us into the water, but with the heat, she wasn't feeling that well. While under her umbrella, someone came up to her. I was further away, so I couldn't tell what they were saying, so I decided to walk up and introduce myself.

It was an African-American woman who was obviously in the middle of a sex change process since she was wearing shorts and a tight sports bra. Her (or his) voice was part man- part woman. Cambria and she were talking about something and it was getting pretty heated.

I finally got close enough to hear the woman say: "Why would you even come here?"

"I'm on vacation with my family, not like that's any of your business, Shawna," said Cambria.

"Oh, really? Not here to lose a few pounds?"

"I would think even someone of your base intelligence can tell the difference between a pregnant woman and a fat one."

"I could, but it's not like I would care either way."

"If you so much as touch me, you're in for a world of pain." It happened so quickly. Shawna punched Cambria's stomach, Cambria flinched in pain, but was quick enough to ignore it to get a good bite in before Shawna ran off.

I ran to Cambria's side. She was lying on her towel, gripping her stomach in pain. "Cambria! Are you all right?!" I asked.

"Brian… it's happening. They're coming now," she said.

"Are you sure?"

"Brian!" She let out a cry and I quickly lifted her into my arms. The family quickly followed me to the car. I put Cambria in the passenger side with Lois while I took the wheel. I'm sure I broke plenty of street laws on my way to a veterinary clinic, but we were able to get Cambria on a stretcher in time. By the time we got there though, she already looked drained… and she hadn't even started yet.

They refused to let me in until after the children were born for fear I would try to eat my kids, but I swallowed my rebuttal for Cambria's sake. So, we waited. It took so long, I had thought that, when the doctor finally did come out, he was gonna deliver to me the worst news possible: that my wife and children had died. The news I received was quite the opposite.

"Mr. Brian Griffin?" asked the doctor.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Congratulations, your wife is fine, as well as the nine puppies she gave birth to," said the doctor.

"N- nine puppies?" I asked, not sure I heard him correctly.

"That's correct," he replied. From there, I remember nothing until I woke up in a chair beside Cambria's side. I assumed I had fainted.

"Hello, Brian," Cambria said weakly.

"Cambria," I said, concerned.

"I'm fine," she answered for my unspoken question.

"The puppies…?"

"They're all perfectly healthy. The only problem is…"

"Is what?"

"One of them is blind."

This is where I leave you. Deal with it. Anyway, I don't think there'll be many more chapters after this. The story is coming to its conclusion soon. So, please keep reading and reviewing, thanks :)