Title: The Wise Man
Genre: Humor/ Drama
Rating: T (M-ish. This is what I get for not writing lemons for an entire year.)
Word Count: 432
Summary: As a child, he was taught to choose his battles wisely, but faced with an angry Sakura or public humiliation, which was the lesser evil?

A/N: Inspired by my friend RyanRendan's piece that he wrote a while back. This is my expanded (less fluffy) take on it. And since it was birthday-related, now seemed as good a time as any to post. Happy birthday, Kakashi! And if you ever come to life, call me!

When he was a child, one of the first things his father ever taught him was to never choose a battle he couldn't win. Granted, one rarely ever picked battles in the shinobi world (he'd rather avoid it if he could), but he understood what his father meant: don't go overboard and do something stupid you're going to regret. It was an invaluable lesson, one that would be repeated through his career time and time again. Even when he resented his father, he still knew this was a true edict to live by.

However, as Kakashi has said before, one rarely ever picked battles in the shinobi world, and it certainly wasn't like he asked to get a year older. However, he did, and now he was facing the consequences in the form of a birthday party. Though it didn't sound too bad (free booze rarely ever sounded bad), it wasn't the party itself that had Kakashi worried. It was the presents.

Though presents were usually reason to celebrate—who was he to argue with free stuff?—the gift he was currently staring down was making his eye twitch ever-so-uncomfortably. What was it? Why, it was a pink mask from his similarly pink-haired girlfriend.

Though he loved Sakura to bits—and he did love her to bits, and all her bits—part of him wanted to ask why in God's name she got him a pink mask.

'Does it look like pink is my color?'

As if sensing his hesitation, Sakura looked at him and asked, "Don't you like it?"

Kakashi gulped in his seat as more people circled to gaze in on the developing situation. Despite the pout in her voice and her glistening eyes, he could already hear her cracking her knuckles on the tabletop. He was walking on very thin ice here; everything hinged on his answer. On the one hand, he could say that while it was a very nice thought—and it was!—he didn't like it, and subsequently get beaten half to death on his birthday and be forced to sleep on the couch for the rest of the week (Of all the days for his birthday to fall on a Sunday). On the other hand, he could lie and say he loved it. Sakura would undoubtedly be happy (and he might get lucky), but then, there would be the copious amount of public humiliation to deal with, seeing how every person he knew was at this party.

"Well?" Sakura prompted.

Kakashi sank ever so slightly in his seat. Hopefully his answer wouldn't get him killed.