32- The Public

I break the kiss, not wanting to push her too far, and I take her hands in mine, pulling her over to my bed.

I lay down and she curls up against my side, her arm around my waist.

"Are you okay with this?" I ask gently. "Do you want me to go get my shirt?"

I feel her face burn against my chest as she blushes. It's a wonder I can feel the difference at all, seeing as I'm already burning up.

"I'm all right," She murmurs. "Are you? Your heart is racing."

"Yeah, well, that has nothing to do with fear," I replied, repeating words similar to the one's she'd said to me in my fear landscape.

Which reminds me.

"Tris, when I was watching during your fear landscape, you were ... being thrown all around the room. . . What was that fear?"

"I was drowning and being beaten against rocks."

I frown. "You're afraid of drowning?"

"No. I'm afraid of being out of control."

I pause and then speak carefully. "Do you think ... do you think that's why you're afraid of me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Almost everything ... intimate that we've done, I've initiated. When you were the one who grabbed my hand that day, were you afraid?"

"No."

"When you sat on my lap yesterday and kissed me, were you afraid?"

She pauses. "Maybe a little," she says.

"It's because you decided to do those things. And with my lap, well, you were in my arms, I had more control than you. I think that you need to be in control of our physical relationship for a little while," I say slowly.

"I ... don't know. I've never actually ..." She seems afraid I brush the back of my hand along her cheek soothingly.

"It's only me," I tell her. "I'm not judging you. Just relax. Do what feels natural."

She closes her eyes and leans forward, pressing her lips to mine. I respond to the kiss, of course, but I make no move to touch her. She needs to be in control.

She guides my hand to her waist, so I curl my hand, holding her hipbone. She tips her head, deepening the kiss, and I return the enthusiasm. She runs her fingers across my cheeks, into my hair. I am burning, and it is taking all my strength not to touch her more than she wants me to.

She shifts and puts one knee on either side of my hips, bending down to me. I can't think and I can't breathe.

Then she breaks the kiss, her legs moving out from under her as she rests her head on my shoulder, lying on top of me.

"I'm sorry," She breathes. "That was..."

"Don't apologize," I gasp, breathless. She sighs, breathing a gush of hot air over my neck.

She closes her eyes. "I don't like that Eric injected me with that tracking thing today."

"I know." I press my lips into a hard line. "It bothered me. Actually, watching you go through your entire fear landscape bothered me. I might develop a fifth fear, Tris, and it might just be you."

She laughed. "Have you gone in again?"

"Not since we went in together. I don't think I can go in without you."

"You used to do it all the time."

"It's different now, now that I know what it's like to have you with me." I shrug.

She smiles and presses her face into my neck. I hold her closer. I feel her eyes flutter closed, and a minute later her breathing is even. I sigh and carefully rearrange her so that her head is on my chest instead. I kiss her forehead.

"I love you," I murmur before resting my cheek against her hair and falling asleep myself.

...

Soft fingers trace my cheekbones, painting them with delicious fire.

"Tobias," the most beautiful voice in the world breathes. "Wake up."

The flames press to my forehead—her lips. "Mm," I breathe.

"We have to go to the banquet."

"No."

She laughs and the bed shakes as she gets up. Goosebumps cover my arms immediately. It's too cold to be shirtless without touching her. I get to my feet and go to find my shirt.

"I like your tattoos," she informs me casually as she slides her feet into her shoes. Her cheeks are pink.

"I like yours too," I replied, leaning down and kissing her forehead before putting on my sweatshirt and shoes.

"Thanks," She said as I held the door for her. I wasn't sure if it was for the tattoo compliment or the door.

She watches me carefully as we walk. Can she tell that I'm lighter than air? I have never been happier than I am right now.

When we get to the doors, I smile and gesture for her to go first. I want to kiss her goodbye, but that's impossible now.

I walk in a moment later and go to Lauren immediately.

"What happened to you? Your mood is the entire opposite of the way it was this morning..."

I smile. "Well, I just spent the last two hours snuggling with Tris, so..."

She grins. "You two are so cute. When are you going to go public?"

"Whenever she wants to," I shrug.

Eric obnoxiously taps on the microphone then, and I turn to glare hatefully at him.

"We aren't big on speeches here. Eloquence is for the Erudite." I roll my eyes. Is he forgetting he was Erudite? "So I'm going to keep this short. It's a new year and we have a new pack of initiates. And a slightly smaller pack of new members. We offer them our congratulations."

Noise erupts and I use the distraction to glance at Tris. She has a small smile on her face. She likes the roaring, the clapping. She belongs here.

My gut tugs as I remember the backup plan I'd formulated—be factionless, find Evelyn for shelter, take care of Tris.

"We believe in bravery. We believe in taking action. We believe in freedom from fear and acquiring the skills to force the bad out of our world so that the good can prosper and thrive. If you also believe in those things, we welcome you."

Tris smiles, and so do I. Eric's a liar and a fake, but I like to believe what he just said.

"Tomorrow, in their first act as members, our top ten initiates will choose their professions, in the order of how they are ranked. The rankings, I know, are what everyone is really waiting for. They are determined by a combination of three scores—the first, from the combat stage of training; the second, from the simulation stage; and the third, from the final evaluation, the fear landscape. The rankings will appear on the screen behind me."

They appeared then, and I grinned hugely.

Tris was first.

My Tris was first.

I looked at her immediately. She's smiling just like me. A weight in her eyes is gone.

"Go to her, you idiot!"

I don't need any more encouraging. I throw Lauren and thankful grin and then I'm fighting my way through the crowd to her.

By the time I make it to her side, her friends are making out. I tap her shoulder and she jumps up and spins around to grin at me.

"You think giving you a hug would give away to much?" I ask.

"You know. I really don't care."

And then her arms are locked around my neck and her lips are on mine and I am a burning man.

For half a second I am frozen in shock. Then my eyes close and my hands go to her waist, pulling her tightly against me. Her lips gently push mine apart and she breathes into my mouth. The entire room is on fire and I don't care. I'm never leaving. My hands slide up her sides to her shoulders. I accidentally brush over the bandage from the bandage from where Eric injected her, and she pulls away from me. I wonder what I did wrong. I couldn't have hurt her that much.

Her eyes are bulging and she stares at me in horror.

"Tris?"

"Not now," She whispers. "Later, okay?"

I nod. Then I notice that the majority of the room had gone silent. Almost all eyes are on us. I reach out and take her hand in mine.

We'd gone public.

A/N: This is probably the last chapter I'll upload today, but here it is. Should I write the reactions to their publicity or should I go straight to when he wakes up and everyone else is being controlled? Review and let me know! Tell me how I did with the pre-banquet scene. I feel like it may have been a little out of character, but ...