Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. I am in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise, I just use their creations to have my wicked way with them. No copyright infringement is intended.
This story wouldn't be what it is without my wonderful beta, The Real Teacher, holding my hand, correcting my many errors and talking me down from the ledge when I'm this close to deleting a chapter. Thank you so much!
- 24 -
"Bella, wait!" I could hear the clicking of Alice's heels behind me on the road as I jogged, desperately trying to catch up on Edward who'd disappeared into the undergrowth covering the track that led from his house to mine.
"I have to talk to him," I answered, more to myself than to her.
"And you will, Bella," she was quick to reply, her hand fastening around mine and yanking be backwards before I could set a foot on the forest path. "But not tonight."
"Why the hell not?" I challenged her, my heart beating frantically with regret, guilt, horror and a desperate need to make this right again.
"Because he's angry right now," she stated calmly, "and you're way too upset to think straight and act rationally."
I spun around, my eyes unwillingly leaving the forest edge to scowl at her. "He just stormed out of here like a fucking maniac without giving me a chance to explain and…."
"Don't you see, Bella?" she pleaded. "If you go after him right now, the only thing that will happen is history repeating itself…."
"He told you?" I gasped, not quite sure how I felt about that.
"Of course he did," Alice shrugged, before searching my eyes with her own. "We kind of have this thing where we talk and stuff…."
I frowned. "So what are you? His therapist?"
She shrugged. "How about his friend?"
I sighed, finally giving in and abandoning my quest to follow Edward into the woods as I let Alice tug me back towards the house. "He's a good man, Bella," she spoke softly. "A better man that he gives himself credit for."
"I know," I muttered.
"And he loves you," Alice went on, acting as if she hadn't heard me, "enough even to want to change himself into a better person just so that it might earn him the chance of ever gaining your high opinion of him again."
"I know," I repeated, shrinking further into myself with embarrassment.
"Then why do you still fight it?" she challenged me.
I shrugged, not exactly feeling up to bearing my soul to a total stranger. "I dunno."
"Then figure your shit out!" she commanded, before sighing like she was gearing up to explain a difficult math problem to a bunch of mathematically challenged freshmen. "Look: I know you're scared and shell-shocked about the speed and ferocity in which this romance kind of thingy has developed between the two of you but, for the love of Dolly Parton, snap out of it!"
"W-What?" The look on my face probably didn't scream 'intelligence' or even 'brain-activity' but I was beyond caring at that point.
"You have this guy willing to jump through burning hoops just to get you to notice him but instead of cutting the poor sod some slack you just go and line up the next round."
I arched my brow. "You're still not making any sense."
Alice rolled her eyed in a 'oh my God, you're sooooo stupid' kind of way. "If you ever want to get somewhere with Edward, you're going to have to let him in, Bella," she said, emphasizing the last three words before my name.
"Don't you think I've been trying to do that?" I yelled.
"Have you really?" she challenged. "Because it sure doesn't look like it to me."
"What the hell do you know about me?" I spat, wondering why I was even listening to the annoying little sprite in the first place. "For the last two weeks it seems like all I've been doing is cutting him slack and giving him chance after chance without even stopping to think how that made me feel."
She grabbed my arm before I could get the hell away from her. "I can only begin to imagine how hard it is for you to trust him and let him back in, but can't you see that by raising all these roadblocks you're creating a very one sided friendship?"
I felt like yelling back at her, tearing free of her hold and – hell- maybe even spitting the dammed little nuisance in the face.
But I didn't.
Because part of me was really intrigued by what she had to say.
"Edward's really trying here," she continued. "but if you don't match his honesty and fess up to your own fears and doubts, the two of you are never going to be real friends."
She sighed. "I don't condone his storming out of the house like his ass is on fire any more than you should be doing, and when we get back I am going to sort his ass out and get him to take some anger management classes even if it will be the death of me…but in this case, I can see why he did it."
I looked up, wanting her to continue more than I wanted to refute her words. "Walking into your house, knowing what kind of reception he was going to get, couldn't have been easy for him and then to be blindsided like that….I can see why he wanted to get the hell away from it all before he did something really stupid."
There was something in her words that made me deflate like a hot air balloon hitting a cactus. She was right.
I had let Edward walk into my dad's house that day, unknowing of the minefield he was stepping into.
"So what do I do now?" I asked, kicking a few pebbles that lay by the side of the road. "How do I make this right again?"
"Talk to him, Bella," Alice, whose uncanny ability to read my mood had softened up a bit. "Tell him what went on in your brain. Tell him what made you decide to hide behind a boyfriend that wasn't instead of coming clean to him. I promise you: it will help."
I sighed. "I'll try." It seemed so easy when she put it like that, but I knew it wasn't. Edward and I…..we had a long road ahead of us.
"And don't you dare toy with him," she finally warned me. "If you want him, go for it. If you don't, let him know instead of stringing him along. Because as much as I like you, if I ever find you messing with that guy's head then, by God, I will kick that skinny little ass of yours so hard you'll be farting from your mouth."
Somehow there wasn't a doubt in my mind that she could do that. "Noted."
"Just give him tonight to calm down and get some perspective and maybe talk to him tomorrow?" Alice offered, her demeanor shifting from Bellatrix Lestrange back to a more socially acceptable (as well as sane) level.
"Fine," I sighed, giving in – though be it reluctantly – to Alice's plea.
"I'll talk to him when we get back and see if I can get him to look at things from your perspective," Alice went on, a lot more hopeful than I ever could be. "And who knows? Maybe by morning things will have worked out on their own?"
I rolled my eyes. "Yeah and maybe tomorrow morning little birds will help me get dressed when I get up."
"I'd like to see that!" Alice chuckled, offering her arm. "Come on! Let get back to the house. That is….if it's still standing."
"I do hope so!" I groaned, though knowing my mom's somewhat tempestuous nature I wasn't holding out much hope. "Because it way too cold to sleep outside right now and as things stand between us, I don't think Edward would offer me his spare room!"
"You'll be welcome to sleep in my car," Alice snickered. "It has more than enough leg room for you to be comfortable."
Before I followed Alice back to my dad's house, I let my eyes glide along the forest's edge one last time, hoping against hope that Edward would emerge from the dense tree line and allow me to make this right again.
God, I'd been so fucking stupid!
Why did I wait for the 'perfect moment' to tell him, knowing full well that no such thing as that had ever existed? Why couldn't I have just told him in the car on our way here? Why did I have to make such a big production out of it?
The answer was simple: because I was scared to death of how he was going to react…..
Well, now I'd done it. By not telling him I'd effectively made sure that Edward would never do the thing I was so scared off. Congratulations, Bella Swan! Are you happy now?
No.
I wasn't happy. In fact, I was as far from happy as a person could get and with my attempt to run after him and force him to hear me out and offer my apologies frustrated, I had no idea of how I was ever going to make this right again.
Had Alice been right? Was it better to let him stew for a night before talking to him?
And if it was…what would I say?
"What on earth is he doing over there?" Alice's voice sounded, her brow pulling into a frown as she noticed her husband sitting outside on the front porch.
I snorted, seeing his long limbs straining to find purpose on the small steps leading up to the front door. "Did my dad kick you out?"
"Nah," he chuckled, his worn jeans and casual shirt making him look like he'd just wandered out of Brokeback. "I volunteered."
I smirked. "That bad, huh?"
"I kinda drew the line when your stepmom – who, by the way is an otherwise charming woman – started throwing dishes at people's heads. I figure I'll be needing to stay on top of my game for tomorrow and a concussion isn't going to do me any good," he answered, humoring his wife by allowing her to think she could actually pull him up as she reached out her hand to help him to his feet again. "I hope the china wasn't some kind of family heirloom or something,"
"I think they destroyed all of the good stuff during their first year of marriage," I snorted. "And, by the way, don't worry: Sue might be scary when she gets pissed, she's got about as lousy an aim as they get. She'll only hit you if she wasn't aiming at you."
"Which was kinda what I was afraid off," Jasper grinned, linking his arm with his wife's. "Come on. Honey. I think we've got one pissed off lawyer to pick up somewhere between here and home. Better we'd snap to it before he makes some lucky wolf a lovely meal."
Alice pouted as she allowed her husband to guide her back towards their insanely big car. "Aw. You're making me feel sorry for the wolf about denying him his food!"
"Thanks for having us over, Bella," Jasper smiled as they reached the end of the drive where his car was parked. "It was very….."
"Entertaining?" I offered before he could come up with anything else.
Jasper chuckled. "I guess that's one way of putting it. I guess I'll see you tomorrow at Billy's house."
"I guess you will," I nodded as Alice started waving at me from the passenger's side as if she was on a damn carnival float. Psychologist or not, that woman was in-fucking-sane. "Do you know how to find it?"
"Gas station at the other end of the town, right?" he asked, continuing only when I nodded. "Yeah, we passed it on your way in."
After promising them to thank my dad and Sue for having them over (they'd have done it themselves if the risk of ending up in Forks General Hospital wasn't so great) I waved them goodbye.
Turning back to the house with a sigh, I wished I could have Alice's confidence that all of this would turn out right in the end.
But I didn't.
I knew I'd make a big mistake when I let Edward walk into the house without knowing about the situation with Jake. Alice was right: it wasn't fair on him to expect him to be completely open and honest with me while I was withholding stuff from him all along.
But I'd never meant for this to happen.
I still couldn't believe my dad, though. I knew my problem was mostly of my own creation but never in a million years had I ever expected my dad to be so…cruel. Especially after he'd promised me to do his best to remain civil.
The house was eerily silent when I walked in which meant that either Sue had either stormed off after successfully breaking all of the china or she and my dad had reconciled and where now in the midst of a round of hot and steamy make-up sex.
Ugh!
As much trouble I had, making a mental picture of my dad doing anything hot and steamy (and thank God for that!), I had no desire to amend that fact by actually witnessing my dad 'doing the deed'.
"Dad?" I called out cautiously as I lingered in the foyer.
"In here, baby girl!" Dad's voice answered almost immediately from the general direction of the dining room.
I figured it was safe to come in. My dad's voice hadn't sounded like he was in the midst's of anything strenuous and even if he was, I somehow doubted he'd invited me in to observe. I took after my dad in that respect.
"Dad?" I asked when, upon entering the dining room all I could see was a great big mess.
"Under the table," his voice sounded, the clinging of china against china indicating that he was already underway to right said mess. "You wanna get your two cents in as well? I think there might be a few plates left in the kitchen you can throw at me."
"Nah," I shrugged, feeling more guilty and disappointed than angry at the moment. "What would be the fun in targeting an unarmed victim? It would be like shooting fish in a barrel."
"That's my girl." Dad chuckled, finally ducking out from underneath the table. He was looking a little bit worse for wear and, by the look of it, Sue had actually managed to land a few shots on target this time.
I snorted bitterly as I crashed down onto one of the empty chairs. "Looks like she got you good. Not that I feel sorry for you."
"I know." Dad sighed, flinging what used to be the handle on one of the serving dishes to the side. "But that doesn't mean that I don't think what I did was right."
"Dad-," I groaned, only to be stopped by him before I could say something else.
"No, let me get this out, Bella," he pressed. "I've made no secrets in the past that I'm very fond of the idea of having Jacob Black for a son in law…."
He paused as if he had to take a minute to get back in command over himself. "I know you're pretty determined to break things off with the boy and I guess I'll have to respect that but for the love of God, don't go mixing your lot in with the Cullen kid, Bells. He's bad news and you know it."
I sighed long and deep, closing my eyes as I geared up for battle. "He's changed."
My dad snorted, just like I'd expected him to. "Sure. And am I supposed to believe that?"
I looked up at him, hoping he would at least see the truth in my eyes. "You're supposed to believe me, dad. Trust me. At first I was as unwilling as you were to believe him but somewhere along the way I realized that he was for real." It wasn't until I spoke the words out loud that I realized how true they were. I trusted Edward.
Dad shook his head at me as he let out a bitter laugh. "The only thing that's 'for real' about that kid is the way he's been successfully manipulating everyone around him."
"Did you know that he told me everything about what happened that day in the woods?" I challenged him, acting as if I hadn't heart his final remark.
"Oh yeah?" Dad snickered darkly. "Did he also tell you that I expressly forbade him to ever contact you again? That doesn't make him very trustworthy now, does it?"
"He told me that too, dad," I scowled, "but don't you think I'm old enough to decide who I hang out with?"
"Apparently not if you're still hanging around that Cullen kid," dad sneered back. "I'm not the bad guy, here. I'm just trying to look out for my little girl."
"I know dad," I sighed, getting more desperate by the minute now that talking to my dad seemed to get me nowhere. "I would have gone into the kitchen to fetch those plates you were talking about just now a long time ago. But as much as I like the fact that you're looking out for me, you'll have to trust me on this one."
I let out another deep breath. "You spend five minutes in his presence but I got to see a whole lot more of him over the last couple of weeks. At first I didn't want him near me any more than you do, but in time I started to see the changes in him. Sure, he's not there yet, but he's trying, dad and I feel that with him I can be myself and….."
I blushed, admitting the truth to myself only seconds before I admitted it to my dad. "….and I'm completely safe."
"No you're not," dad snarled, his voice raising as his desperation too, increased. "Don't think I don't know what's going on in the big city just because I live in a backwards little town. I know they found this kid murdered in some park the other day, which so happens to be the same park where you had a meeting after dark with a guy you called – what was it again? – Mr. Anonymous in your latest contribution to The Daily."
My hand shot up to my throat as my heart started to speed up to hummingbird levels. "You….you know?"
He arched one brow. "I'm a cop, Bells. A cop and a father. What the hell am I supposed to do?"
"I don't know." I shrugged, sending a shard of flower covered china crashing into the corner of the room as I kicked at it. "I'm just kinda surprised you read my stuff and…you know."
This somehow seemed to offend him. "Of course I do!" he growled. "Hell, I'd post it all over the town's bulletin board if only Sue let me cut through other people's articles. I'm proud of ya, Bells. That is, when you're not off getting yourself mixed up in things that are way bigger than you can handle."
"I know, daddy," I answered him in a soft voice. "That's why I asked to be taken off the case."
The way he looked at me told me that he wasn't quite sure to believe me. "Because of the danger?"
I chuckled. He knew me too well. "That and because of a stark conflict of interest."
"The Cullen boy," he growled, bringing us right back to square one. "Well, at least I have to hand it to him that his annoying presence in your life is keeping you out of harm's way."
"Yes," I answered calmly. "I know you don't like him and probably never will, but I do. And nothing you can say is going to change my mind."
He started to laugh, much to my surprise. "Do you have any idea of how much you remind me of your mother right now?"
"No?" I replied, my answer coming out more like a question than a statement of fact.
"She stood up to those snooty parents of hers too, you know," he chuckled, his eyes far away. "Told them she'd have me no matter what, come hell or high water. Well, you know how that ended."
"That doesn't mean…." I started.
"I know that, sweetheart," he interrupted me, his eyes looking tired yet resigned. "What I'm trying to say is that I don't want to see this thing drive a wedge between us just like it did to your mom and her folks."
He sighed, rubbing his mustache. "So I guess I'll just have to resign myself to the facts and accept that you and the Cullen boy are a done deal."
I mouthed dropped open with surprise, making him chuckle. "Thanks dad!" I managed to gasp, throwing my arms around him and pulling him into a one-sided hug that was extremely awkward until finally he responded to it.
"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, uncomfortably patting me on the back. "This still doesn't mean I like it one bit, though. You tell that boy to always sleep with one eye open and that if he – or anyone else for that matter – ever so much as harms a single hair on that pretty little head of yours, his ass is mine no matter what his fancy lawyer friends might do to defend him. I'm holding him responsible for your wellbeing."
"I will, dad," I chuckled, not exactly caring for anything else but the fact that this thing between me and my dad had been resolved – no matter how reluctant Charlie had been. "That is….if I can ever get him to talk to me again after what just happened."
My dad had the god grace to at least look guilty, though his words didn't speak of it. "He'd be an ass if he gave up on you that easily."
Before long I could feel that my dad had had enough of the touchy-feely shit for one day. "I'd better go to bed," I said with a shrug, untangling myself from his hold. "Long day tomorrow and all."
"Yeah, you should," dad nodded, scratching the back of his head.
I leaned in to kiss his cheek, inwardly relishing in the way he froze up because of my actions. "Good night dad."
"Good night, Bells," he chuckled as he ducked down to retrieve his dustpan and brush. "Oh and Bella?"
I turned around at the sound of his voice. "Yeah?"
"You're supposed to sleep in my bed with Sue tonight. She left very clear instructions about that." And, as I laughed at him, he added. "Plus, over the years I've learned that crawling into bed with your stepmother after we've just had an argument isn't a very smart move."
"Got it, dad!" I snickered, before grabbing my bag from Sue's artist studio and making my way upstairs glad that I would get to sleep on my dad's side of the huge, comfy bed while my dad would have to make do with a lumpy, tiny fold out.
I guess as a cop he should have known that there would be no rest for the wicked!
- x -
The next morning found me standing on the doorstep of Billy's house bright and early in the morning, still rubbing the sleep out of my eyes with one hand as I brought my steaming travel cup up to my lips with the other and drowned the last of the strong black coffee inside of it.
I was going to need a whole lot more of those before I'd be able to call myself awake. Spending the night tossing around in bed while trying to come up with a way to solve a clusterfuck of humongous proportions would do that to a person…..
Alice had texted me late last night to tell me that all three of them had made it back to the Cullen's house in one piece but also warned me that Edward was still in a terrible mood.
Not that I could blame him.
It would make getting through to him a lot harder, though, which was why I'd made sure to be at Billy's bright and early to at least make sure that Jake was out of the way before Edward and Jasper would arrive.
The last thing I needed right now was for someone to have to call in my dad to break up a fight between Jake and Edward. I'd never hear the end of it.
"Morning, Bella," Billy greeted me as he opened the door, chuckling at my state of half-sleep and the nearly empty cup in my hand. "This place may not look like much but I do happen to have a coffee maker. You didn't have to bring your own!"
"This one was just for the road." I could feel my cheeks pinking up. I knew he was only joking but still….
He shook his head, twisting the wheels of his wheelchair so that I could move past him into the house. "Right. I should have known that. Your dad always claims you can't even get as far as the mailbox without breaking your neck in the morning before you've had your coffee."
I shuffled past him. "So, you and Charlie talk about me around my back? What else have the two of you been cooking up lately?"
He snickered conspiratorially as he shoved the door closed. "Believe me, you don't want to know."
And somehow I didn't think he was horsing around with me this time.
We were silent for a couple of moments, me deep in thought and Billy hard at work getting his antique coffee pot to brew another batch of the strong black coffee he knew I liked.
"Bella?" I looked up from my thoughts, a little started to find him right in front of me and studying me as if he didn't quite know what to make of this whole situation.
I frowned. "Yeah?"
"Not that I don't enjoy your company and all that…" he started hesitantly, "but aren't you a bit, I don't know, early? I thought you guys weren't supposed to show up until eleven and it's only ten right now."
I blushed. "I should start explaining that, shouldn't I?"
When he nodded I went on, folding my hand around the chipped mug containing another dose of the heavenly brew. "I was hoping to have a chat with Jake before our meeting but I couldn't find him anywhere so…..."
Charlie chuckled. "He went out earlier to make sure Eileen had her truck back in time to drive her youngest to his game. He should be back by now, though, if you want to talk to him."
I nodded. "Do you mind?"
He chuckled as if I'd said something funny. "Not at all. It's about time you give that boy the closure he needs to move on with his life, instead of moping around all day."
His words send a jolt of pain through my heart. Though he may not have been very high up on my list of favorite people lately, Jake was a good man and I'd never set out to hurt him. Billy and Jake had been there for me through good times and bad over the last couple of years and – and wrong as Jake and I were as lovers – I would hate to lose either of them as friends over this. "I'm so sorry, Billy. I wish…."
His hand folded around mine, his eyes shining up at me with a sad kind of honesty that tore through my open wound like a razorblade. "Don't be. The two of you simply weren't meant to be and no amount of wishing or wanting could ever have changed that. Go set that boy straight, Bella. You owe it to him and to yourself."
I managed to pull the corners of my lips into a smile. "Wise words. Did you tell him that as well?"
"Nope," Billy replied, grinning wickedly. "I think I'm going to leave that to you."
"And to think I liked you!" I scowled in jest as I grabbed my mug for comfort – God knew I was going to need all the liquid comfort I could get – and made my way back across the yard to the repair shop.
Jake was in. If the sight of his car sitting in its usual spot didn't clue me in, the sound of good old country music blaring from the speakers and tools clanging around were a dead giveaway.
"Hey, Jake!" I called out as I entered the shop, my voice not quite managing to sound as upbeat as I intended it to be.
My first reply was another loud clang, followed by a string of profanities. "Hi Bells," he voice called out. He sounded pained and I wasn't quite sure of all of that could be explained by whatever he just banged into. "What's up?"
I took a deep, steadying breath. "I think it's about time we had that talk. Are you free?"
It remained silent for so long that I was almost starting to doubt whether or not he'd heard me. "I guess," he finally sighed, sounding more resigned than enthusiastic.
But I guess I couldn't blame him.
I started looking for words to say the moment I could see his body sliding out from underneath the dilapidated old Ford Explorer he was working on but came up with nothing. Not even after he walked up to me and grabbed a filthy looking piece of cloth to clean his hands ( though I did wonder how he was ever going to get clean from using a rag that looked like it hadn't seen a washing machine in years).
Nothing at all.
Which, for someone who was planning to make her trade out of linguistic virtuosity, was rather disappointing.
But not even my disappointment could get me to open my mouth and speak.
And, unfortunately, Jake noticed it too. "I thought you wanted to talk?" he scowled, throwing his wrench on the workbench with a loud thud.
'I did…I do…I mean…." I was ready to pull out my hair at that point. "This is hard for me, okay? Cut me some slack!"
"This is hard for you?" he seethed. "Try having to stand there and try and be reasonable knowing you're seconds away from getting dumped!"
"Y-you know?" I gasped.
He rolled his eyes. "Of course I do. I may be persistent but I'm not stupid!"
"But then why did you…"
"Persist?" he offered, continuing only after I nodded. "Because I love you, Bella. And I didn't want to just walk away from this knowing there might have been a chance at us getting back together."
I sighed. "Jake….." I was halfway reaching out to him when he stopped me.
"Don't," he pleaded, moving backwards. "Just…don't. It will make this only harder on both of us."
I guessed he was right. "So, this is it, huh?"
He nodded, looking at his feet. "I guess so."
"For what it's worth: I'm sorry," I spoke. "I never set out to hurt you or string you along. I wanted this as much as you did…as much as anyone did."
"I know," he muttered, his hand twitching by his side as if he wasn't sure whether to reach out to touch me or hit something. "But I guess you can't force the heart, huh?"
"I guess not," I admitted, knowing the truth in his words. My heart had already been given away long before I even met Jake. And, though my feelings about the one I gave it to had changed more often than Rhianna's hairstyle, it hadn't ever been returned.
"So, was that all?" he repeated my words from before, picking up some kind of greasy tool as he looked like he couldn't wait for me to bugger off so that he could get back to his car.
The miserable grease-covered son of a bitch!
After all my tossing and turning and trying to prepare for Jakes rage or sadness and coming up with a million and one retorts to every possible thing he may have had to say to me, his
"Yeah, I guess it was," I fumed, storming out of the shop before my mouth ran off and said something that was only going to make this worse.
Little did I know that I was simply running from one bad situation straight into another.
Alice's ridiculously humongous black Escalade pulled up right as I crossed the yard back to Billy's house. In fact, it swerved so close as it moved past me that I almost landed face first into the uneven surface of cobble-stones and mud that lined the gas-station area of the Black's business enterprise.
If you could call a gas station consisting of two pumps and a little shop where people could pay and buy some candy bars and a slightly larger barn that was used as the repair shop an enterprise.
Their business was pretty much a metaphor for the town: it had seen better days but you couldn't imagine a world without it. It had been there longer than I had been alive and, if Jake had any say in it, it would be there for the foreseeable future as well.
"Are you okay, Bella?" Jasper asked, jumping out of the passenger side of the truck/tank.
I guess I should have known from the attempt at my life that it had been Edward behind the wheel.
"I'm fine," I shrugged, brushing a few non-existent specks of dust from my sweater. "You might want to think again about letting Sullen Cullen drive your car, though. He's a lawsuit waiting to happen."
"Nah, I think he's just not that much of a morning person." Jasper snorted as Edward made his way down from the driver's side with a look on his face that didn't bode well for a quick reconciliation.
"Not much of a morning person?" I chuckled, paying no attention to Edward's death glares. "You can say that again! The guy tried to run me over with his little tank!"
"Whatever," Edward growled, pushing past me so closely that, for the second time that day, he made me wobble on my feet. "Let's just get this over with."
I sighed, staring after him. "Charming."
"What did you expect?" Jasper chuckled. "It's Edward Cullen we're talking about here. If there's anyone in the world who can make a mountain out of a molehill it's him. And you have to admit it: gave him quite an incline to work with."
"I know," I muttered. "But I never meant…."
"Hold it right there, missy," Jasper interrupted me. "Contrary to my wife, I've made it my life's mission to stay as much out of other people's business as I can and even if I didn't Edward's my friend – well, sort of – and we're here because we have a job to do."
I sighed. "I see."
"So let's just get into that house and listen to what your friend has to say about the case," he offered. "You can worry about getting back into Eddie's good books when we're done."
When we went inside we found Billy and Edward already huddled around the kitchen table discussing the case. "You may want to see this," Edward spoke to Jasper the minute we came in. "Billy took his own photographs of the crime scene."
"Don't expect too much of them," Billy spoke before handing Jasper a small stack of pictures. "I only took these so that I could use them at home, you know, when a thought hit me and I wanted to cross check it against the crime scene."
Jasper whistled, letting his eyes glide over the Polaroid frames. "The placing of the body…" He shook his head, looking up at Edward.
"I know," Edward nodded, his eyes shining with a fire I'd rarely seen in him, giving his already handsome features a glow that set my ovaries alight. "It's almost identical to Jane's."
"She was stabbed to death as well, wasn't she?" Billy remarked.
Edward nodded, rifling through what looked like a copy of the post mortem report and tapping his finger against a paragraph that seemed to hold his attention. "The angle the police are using is that the killer used whatever weapon was handy. Still, I think it's too much of a coincidence that both these girls were stabbed with the same kind of blade."
"You're thinking it's the same killer," Billy stated, nodding slightly as I could almost see the wheels in his head spinning like mad.
Edward shrugged. "We'd be fools not to."
"Do you know if the Medical Examiner handling the case ran a rape kit on Bree?" Jasper wanted to know.
Billy frowned. "I think it's somewhere in there…" He pointed at the dossier Edward was still perusing, "but I seem to remember that there were traces of recent vaginal intercourse…"
"I've got it right here," Edward interrupted. "The resident M.E. concluded that Bree had vaginal intercourse quite soon before she was killed but he or she didn't find any traces of semen, pubic hair or any other kind of DNA on the victim's body. He did find traces of rubber and spermicide, indicating that whoever she had sex with used a condom."
"Just like in the Jane Foster-case," Jasper nodded, tapping his fingers against his lips.
"There's something else, though," Billy started, his voice slightly hesitant. "I don't know if it has any relevance on your investigations but…."
"Please." Edward smiled encouragingly. "If it's something that got your attention, we'd like to know."
"It's just a feeling I had," Billy shrugged, "and it's probably nothing….but when Bree's body was handed back to the family for burial we were kind of surprised that the girl's folks opted to have her cremated. You see, the Tanners were staunch Catholics which was why we would have thought they'd want their girl to be buried."
Jasper frowned, nodding as he listened intently. "Do you know why they opted for cremation?"
"We never asked," Billy shrugged. "We had other, more pressing, matters to deal with at that time and even if we would have asked….I somehow doubt we would have been given a straight answer."
"Why?" I wondered out loud, my interference earning me a glare from Edward.
"I got the feeling that the Tanners weren't too fond of us poking around in their private lives," Billy explained. "I do know that it was the hospital that picked up the tab for Bree's funeral, since the Tanners didn't have the means to give their kid a proper send off. Maybe that had something to do with it….."
I frowned, the whole matter striking me as somewhat odd. Why would the hospital strong-arm a pair of grieving parents into cremating their child when their personal beliefs – beliefs in which they'd raised their kid – told them that was wrong?
Jasper and Edward continued to question Billy like that for the next hour, rarely ever needing any input from me apart from when I made myself useful filling up their coffee cups or rifling through Billy's kitchen cabinets looking for something to eat.
You'd think I'd feel like a fool, being left out of the loop like that.
But I didn't.
In a way it was almost liberating to be off the case and look at it like an outsider would. It was only now that I was beginning to see how good both Edward and Jasper were at what they did. Jasper had that whole captivating Southern gentleman thing down to a 't' and I could see from the things he said that he was both intelligent and gifted.
But still, he had nothing on Edward.
Edward was on fire throughout the meeting, his questions straight and to the point, his attention never wavering and the flexibility of his mind and accurateness of his statement winning Billy over even more so than Jasper's Southern flare ever could. I could see how he was going to be a deadly weapon if they'd ever let him loose on an unsuspecting jury.
I would have been very impressed, had he not been such a complete asshole.
All through the meeting he made it his priority to ignore me as best as he could and, if acknowledging me was absolutely necessary, glare at me or belittle me with some derogatory remark about journalists which hit home extra hard because my usual weapon against them – my snark – was failing me.
"Just one more thing," Jasper wrapped up after all questions about the Bree Tanner case had been answered and a pretty damn tasty – if I may say so since I'd been the one to cook it – vegetable stew had been polished off. "I think I remember that you told Bella at some point how you thought your old colleagues from the force reacted a bit strangely to your information?"
Billy shifted uncomfortably in his wheelchair. "How about you try 'not at all'?" he smirked.
"Who did you speak to?" Edward asked.
"Initially to one of my old buddies. He's got a desk job now, but he still remembers the old times when he and I used to chase the bad guys," Billy chuckled. "He connected me to one of the detectives handling the case as soon as he learned what I had to say for myself, though. Turns out I knew the guy, though not very well. He was only a rookie in uniform around the time I left but I remembered him because even then he was one of the most ambitious sons of bitches I'd ever seen in my life. I always knew the boy would make it far."
"Do you remember his name?" Jasper sounded as eager as a puppy encountering a ball.
"Sure I do," Billy snickered. "My legs may be a bit wonky but the old brain still works like a charm. The name was Santiago. Detective Santiago."
I gasped, all three men looking up at me as I scrambled to explain myself. "He told me he never heard about your discoveries. He thought your information must have gotten lost somewhere…."
Jasper nodded. "So it seems the Volturi have infiltrated the Seattle Police Department."
Our meeting ended soon after that. I could tell Billy was hesitant to condemn his old buddies from the force and, seeing as Edward and Jasper had everything they needed, the conversation soon ran dry.
Edward was the first one to leave, claiming something about starting the car while Jasper was still talking to Billy about some of the pictures. I saw that as my golden opportunity to finally speak to Edward, though I had to admit that the 'open mind' I'd had when I drove up to Billy's place this morning had been replaced by a bit more sullen mood.
Edward and his attempt at vehicular manslaughter earlier this morning, had seen to that.
"Edward!" I called out, running after him after saying a quick goodbye and thank you to Billy.
I should have known better than to think I'd get a reply from him, not that I let that stop me, though.
"Dammit Edward! Stop being an ass and at least give me a minute or so to explain myself!" I called after him, letting some of my anger seep into my voice. "We need to talk about this."
He didn't even have the common decency to turn and face me as he answered me, his hand already folding around the door handle of the Escalade. "I don't think so."
"Well I do!" I growled, slamming the door shut before he could get in. "You ran away yesterday before I could defend myself and just now you tried to run me over with your car? I think that warrants a conversation!"
He finally turned to me, his lips turned up in a rather sinister looking smile as he leaned against the car. 'Then please enlighten me, Miss High and Mighty. What is it that I've done to vex you this time?"
"Please, don't be like that," I pleaded, his cruelty making it very hard for me to open up to him about my fears. "I know I did the wrong thing by not telling you about me and Jake but I never meant to hurt you, Edward. Please! You have to believe me."
"Sure I do," he shrugged, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "But while you're at it, could you please explain to me why you had to go through all of that trouble to invent a boyfriend…"
"I didn't invent him," I interrupted him, only realizing what a colossal mistake that was until the words had left my mouth. "Jake and I did use to be together. We only broke up around the beginning of the trial and….."
"While you had to go and invent a boyfriend," Edward repeated himself in a louder, angrier tone, "just to keep me at arm's length. If you didn't trust me, then at least you could have had the balls to tell me so."
"I-I d-didn't," I stammered. I didn't expect this to happen. I would have expected his disappointment or even his frustration but never his anger.
"You know what? Forget it!" He sneered, not giving me a chance to come up with an explanation. "I don't think you really know what you want and I'm done fighting for this when you can't even be bothered to reward my efforts with honesty."
I paled, swallowing hard as I had to admit the truth in his words. "Edward…I…."
"No, Bella," he interrupted me, his voice sounding cold and hard. "I think we're done talking now. I would have fought for you if it had been actual people I had been pitched against, but I can't fight ghosts and figments of your imagination."
As his words stripped me of whatever hope I had left that we would be able to get over this, he jumped inside the car and revved up the engine, Jasper only making it to the passengers' side just in time to duck into the car before it sped off, leaving only dust and devastation in its wake.
But it was only too soon that those feelings were replaced by rage; a big, seething and boiling rage that stirred the flames inside of me even when thick drops of rain started to drip on my skin.
He was doing it again.
That rat bastard was up to his same old tricks, using his anger to mask his true feelings and lashing out before his victim could come up with an explanation or any other logical defense.
He'd pushed me away, just like he'd done ten years ago.
And, what was even worse: I'd let him do that.
Just like ten years ago.
I didn't know it was anger at him or at myself that made me jump into Sue's car and speed of in the direction of the Cullens' home. All I knew was that not even the rain pouring down on the windshield, making it all but invisible to see anything else but my own, haggard reflection could deter me.
I was going to have this out with him, even if I had to hunt him down and tie him to a chair. Which wasn't even such a strange scenario, considering I was up against one of the most pig-headed, stubborn human beings on the planet.
I would have thought that driving through the streaming rain would have become easier once I was on the quiet private lane leading up to the house. The denseness of the trees would keep most of the rain out, making it possible for me to actually see what was going on outside my window as opposed to driving on knowledge and prayer alone.
You'd think that. But you'd be wrong.
With the drops of rain, dripping through the foliage, also came a downpour of leaves and other tree-crap which was almost impossible to get rid of with the inadequate little rubber bands the people who fabricated the tiny little car I was in called windshield wipers. And if that wasn't bad enough, the car got stuck in the mud halfway down the road.
"Come on, come on, come on," I cried, my foot stepping on the gas as I alternated between putting the car in reverse and going full speed ahead – or at least trying to. The only thing that got me was further into trouble.
"Fine then!" I growled, yanking the keys out of the ignition with one hand and flinging the door open with the other. "Be like that!" And with a gracious swirl I launched my body out of the car…..and straight into at least a foot and a half of mud, leaves and other crap mother nature barfed up when she got soaked with rain.
"Fuck!" I gasped as the freezing cold water (and God only knew what else) seeped into my shoes as they sunk further into the dough like mud.
Lovely.
As I tried to extricate my feet from nature's chokehold I felt the compelling need to hit something. The tires of the car looked tempting as hell, but I knew that if I wanted to get to them, I'd have to wade through two feet of cold and sticky mud and there would be a fair chance that by the time I finally made it my feet would be too heavy to lift. Let alone kick.
I'd just have to wait until Edward's face came within striking distance.
My feet made this awful sloshing sound as I waded my way towards the beautiful white mansion at the end of the driveway on foot, the plans I had for Edward when I finally came face to face with the guy become more violent and extravagant with each loud step I took.
That was, until I rounded the corner and found myself standing at a place I must have inhabited over a hundred times in my childhood, gazing out at the familiar fairytale-like architecture of the Cullens' home in Forks.
It truly was an amazing place and, even though it had stood empty for the best part of the last ten years, it still looked every bit as beautiful as I remembered it.
I closed my eyes, letting the memories of the place flood through my mind undisturbed for a moment before I opened them again, my eyes, ironically enough, landing straight on the semicircular bay window behind which Carlisle's study was located. I smiled wryly, noticing the red geraniums planted in the flowerbed underneath it. They were the same flowers Edward and I had found ourselves standing amidst when we overheard the conversation that would change our lives and shape our futures. In a way, it was that conversation that had brought me here today…
I hadn't realized I'd moved until I stood in front of the door, the echo of my hand letting the huge brass knocker come down on the thick oak of the door snapping me out of my reverie.
I must have looked like some kind of soaked through vagabond who'd hid out in the forest for weeks as I stood in front of her but, much to her credit, Alice never as much as pulled a muscle as she saw me standing in front of her. "You're here! Finally," she squealed, almost pulling me into a hug but thinking better of it at the last moment when she noticed my waterlogged appearance.
"My car got stuck in the mud so I had to walk all the way down here," I blurted out. "Do you think Jasper will be able to pull it free again?"
"I think so," she answered, grinning wickedly. "I bet you're glad we brought that big ass car of mine now, aren't ya?"
I couldn't do anything but nod in agreement. "Is Edward home?" I asked, wrapping my arms around my body against the cold.
Alice nodded. "He's in his dad's study. I'll go tell him you're here."
And just like that she disappeared, leaving me out on the doorstep debating on whether to go in or stay outside where it was safe. Safe and cold.
I could faintly hear a door opening and shutting, muffled voices drifting into the room from a room further into the house. The voices got louder as the door opened again shortly afterwards, the sound of Jasper complaining to his wife about having to go out into a torrential downpour to dig my car out of six feet of mud soon becoming clear enough to cause me further embarrassment.
"….but it's raining, Alice!" Jasper groaned as he and Alice appeared from the door I knew lead to the study, Alice dragging her husband behind her like a dog on a leash.
"I know that, honey," Alice answered, rolling her eyes in my direction as if to excuse her husband for his stupidity, "but wouldn't it be fun to explore the woods in the rain? A little rain never hurt anyone!"
I smiled apologetically as he came into my line of vision, a little relieved when he just shrugged and rolled his eyes in reply while his wife rambled on. "And I thought you'd like getting to use the car for anything else but driving. You're always nagging at me about how I don't need a big, powerful car like that when I'm cruising around town."
"Not particularly," Jasper groaned, though he was already halfway in changing his expensive looking fine leather brogues for a pair of more weather-friendly Wellington boots.
"You're not going to be difficult throughout our walk, are you?" Alice scowled, slipping her feet into a pair of stylish pink and white polka dot rubber boots, as she almost poked my eye out with a matching umbrella. "I hate it when you keep moping around on me."
"Then don't make me go out in the fucking rain," Jasper moped, but his wife had already shifted her attention to me by that time.
"You know your way around this place, right?" she asked, continuing only after I nodded. "We'll leave you to it then. Just…..try to be patient with him, Bella."
"I'll try." I smiled bitterly. My patience had worn thin after what had happened this morning but I guess I could give the bastard a minute to explain himself before I laid into him.
I still stood there long after I'd heard Jasper and Alice pull out of the driveway, trying to gather enough courage to move but – for the moment – failing miserably.
"Oh, come on, Bella! You didn't drag your way through the mud just to chicken out at the last hurdle." I hissed at myself, the sound echoing back at me alarmingly loud through all the marble in the foyer. "Move your damn but!"
My little pep talk must have helped because, little by little, I found myself shuffling in the general direction of the study, the door still slightly ajar when I got there.
"Edward?" I called out, pushing it all of the way open to reveal a room bathing in what light the overcast skies would let in.
His back was turned to me, half his body shielded by the huge desk sitting in the middle of the room as he stared out of the window.
"Edward?" I repeated after God knew how much time had gone by in absolute and heavy silken.
"What the hell are you doing here, Bella?" he growled, his body slowly turning towards me to reveal that same cruel smile I'd seen on him before. "I thought I made it pretty clear that I don't want anything more to do with you."
"I said we needed to talk, but you ran away from me before I could actually get a word in so I'm here to try again," I stated, trying to remain as reasonable and patient as I could.
"Don't bother," he sneered. "It's not like you could come up with something new."
And that was when my patience ran out, my hand clawing at the nearest object I could throw at him.
"Fuck you, Edward!" I yelled, the book I threw at him barely missing its target and careening against the wall in a loud smack. "Why do you always have to be such a damn jerk!"
"Oh, I don't know…Maybe because you turn me into one?" He chuckled darkly, making me want to slap him…kill him….kiss him.
"I was scared, okay?"
"Yeah, sure you were." His voice was dripping with sarcasm as his eyes shot stinging darts of anger into me. "The great Bella Swan, who's afraid of no-one."
"I am afraid," I stated, my voice unsteady with emotion. "In fact, I'm fucking terrified of getting my heart broken again. So much so that I used Jake as a way to keep you at arm's length so that you couldn't come close enough to hurt me again."
I could see the exact moment when the dots connected in his head, because all of a sudden his anger deflated, making him seem wary and…. vulnerable. "Bella…." He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in a way that could have either signaled unease or frustration. "God, you can be so fucking dense sometimes."
I guess I had my answer.
"What?" I yelled, my anger flashing hot through my blood again. "Then, if you're so smart all of a sudden, you probably won't mind enlightening me on why it is that I'm so fucking stupid?"
Edward's hands lodged into his hair as he seethed at me, making my treacherous body react to him instantly and violently. "Because – dammit Bella," he groaned, the sexy, husky sound of his voice shooting arrows of lust through my anger. "Can't you see? Even the thought of hurting you makes me want to run as far and fast as I fucking can, just to keep you safe. And I know we both would be better off if I did….but I can't. "
The intensity of his gaze kept me spellbound; my heart pounding and my blood singing a tune it hadn't sang in almost ten years. A tune I thought it had forgotten long ago. "Y-you c-cant?" I finally managed to stammer. "W-why?"
He seemed to be hesitant, his eyes showing a flash of uncertainty while his chest expanded and constricted with his heavy breaths before they settled back upon me with a desperate kind of certainty. "Because I fucking love you!"
There you have it. ;-)
A lot of things happened in this chapter. Did they come as a surprise to you? And what do you think Bella's reaction to Edward's declaration is going to be?
I want to wish everyone a very happy Christmas filled with lots of love, warmth and wonderful food.
I will be posting a visual teaser for the next chapter on the twilighted thread in a few hours so drop by if you're eager to find out what's going to happen next or just of you want to share in the theories, look at the creepy Aro-picture or just hang out.
The link to the thread is: (dot)net/forum/viewtopic(dot)php?f=44&t=13706
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