SO sorry about the massive wait! I've been crazy busy - exams, end of term etc. but anyway I hope you like it! As always would love to know what you think! x
Chapter 25:
"Oh my goodness! Santana, you were so cute!" Rachel squealed in that annoyingly high-pitched voice of hers. Santana glared at her friend who had somehow managed to grab the photo album Brittany had given her as soon as she'd walked through the door of the apartment. It's like she had a talent for knowing exactly how to piss her off.
"Berry, give that back right now or I swear I'm gonna-"
"Kurt, you have to see this! How adorable does she look in this little tutu?" Rachel continued, ignoring the extremely pissed off expression on the Latina's face, as she waved the little book in front of Kurt. He had to cover his mouth with his hand to stifle a laugh as he eyed the picture of a five-year-old Santana in her ballet outfit.
"Wow I must say, Santana, pink really is your colour." He remarked with a smirk, receiving a glare from his roommate.
"Berry, I'm serious!" Santana warned, making another failed attempt to grab the book from Rachel's hands. "Jesus, I really don't have the blood-alcohol level to deal with this right now."
"Oh calm down." Rachel told her, rolling her eyes as she finally handed the album back to her friend. "I don't know why you're embarrassed, you were an adorable child." Santana simply glared back at her as she snapped shut the little book.
"Why thank you, Berry. And I wish I could say the same for you, but I've seen your baby photos - they're terrifying." She retorted, earning herself a mock glare and a stuck-out tongue from her roommate.
"But seriously, Brittany made this?" Kurt asked Santana, who nodded a little bashfully as she eyed the book in her hands. "That's adorable."
"Really adorable." Rachel agreed as she plopped herself down on the couch. "So everything with her parents went well?" Santana smiled and nodded, sitting herself down next to Rachel and leaning her head back against the sofa.
"Yeah everything was great. Her family's pretty awesome." She smiled as she thought back over the past couple of days. "There's definitely something up with her mum though." She added, her smile fading slightly as she remembered the tiniest hint of coldness behind Mrs. Pierce's blue eyes.
"What do you mean?" Kurt asked from the other sofa, sitting forward in his seat. "Did you guys tell her?" His eyes suddenly widened with surprise.
"No no, not yet."
"Not yet?" Rachel questioned, turning to face her roommate properly.
"Britt said she might do it tonight."
"Gosh, that's huge!" Rachel shrieked excitedly, making Santana jump a little next to her. God, inside voice, Berry.
"But you don't think her mum's going to take it so well?" Kurt asked tentatively, looking at Santana questioningly and seeing the worry clouding her face.
"No. I mean… I don't know." She sighed heavily. "I just… I got a weird vibe from her, you know?" Santana leaned forward in her seat, glancing between her two friends as if hoping to find some answers, but unsurprisingly finding nothing. "Mrs. Pierce is really nice and everything, she's just always been a little… I don't know, judgemental I guess." Her roommates both nodded in understanding, but neither seemed to know what to say. What could they say though? Santana sighed again and fell back heavily against the cushions. "I'm just worried about Britt. She's just so trusting, and that's something I love about her but… She thinks they're going to be totally cool with it and I mean they might be but… It'll kill her if they're not, and I just don't want to see her go through that, you know?"
"We know, honey." Rachel told her comfortingly, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "But we're all here for Brittany if that does happen. And we're here for you as well, okay?" Santana nodded and smiled gratefully.
"And, who knows? Maybe Mrs. Pierce will surprise you and be really happy for you two." Kurt added, trying his best to sound optimistic, but Santana could tell he didn't fully believe that. She managed to force a smile as she stood up from the sofa.
"Thanks guys, really, but I think I'm just gonna go to bed. I'm fucking exhausted." She told them, suddenly feeling the weight of the past few days heavy on her shoulders, and needing to be alone for a bit. It had been a great couple of days; she'd loved spending time with Brittany and her family, learning more about the girl that had changed her world so much, and feeling like she was really a part of hers. But it had also been draining; trying to make a good impression, constantly having to be careful about how she was touching or even looking at Brittany. She needed some rest, or at least some time to digest everything.
They both nodded and watched as she solemnly made her way out of the living room and down the corridor. Closing her bedroom door behind her, Santana flopped down onto her bed and let out a heavy sigh. She couldn't help but worry about Brittany. How would her parents take it? How upset would Brittany be if they couldn't accept it? Couldn't accept them? Santana knew her heart would break seeing the look on her girlfriend's face if things didn't go well; those usually bright blue eyes clouded with sadness, those perfect pink lips pulled between her teeth with worry, that adorable forehead crinkled in confusion. She couldn't bare even the thought of it.
Santana opened the little book still in her hands and immediately felt herself smile. Brittany's young face looked back at her, beaming brightly and lifting her spirits as it always had. She delicately turned over the pages, carefully taking in each photograph; each cheeky little grin, each perfect little moment captured on camera all those years ago, and shook her head, a stupid smile on her face as she wondered how in the hell she'd gotten so lucky.
Santana wasn't sure how long she lay there, leafing through page after page of old photographs and memories, allowing herself to step back in time and relive every single one in ridiculously perfect detail, as if it had been only the other day rather than over ten years ago, but she soon felt her eyelids getting heavy and her body beginning to ache from tiredness. She closed the album and rolled over to place it on her bedside table, only to completely miss and watch it tumble to the floor. Fucking hell, she needed some sleep. Santana huffed and sat up, leaning down to retrieve the book, but she froze when something caught her eye. It had fallen open on the back page and how had she not noticed this before? Stuck onto the page with sellotape, was a little hand-made envelope – you know those ones you thought you were seriously cool by making when you were younger? – with a pink heart sticker sealing it closed. Santana grinned at this little detail which was just so Brittany, and lifted the book back up from the floor. Carefully so as not to tear it, she opened the little envelope and pulled out three folded up pieces of paper. Intrigued, she opened up the first one, only to catch her breath when she saw the first two words written on there.
Dear Santana…
Her heart melted a little as she took in the adorably messy handwriting of a young Brittany S. Pierce, and she opened up the others, only to see that each one took the same form; a letter addressed to her. Settling back against her pillows, she couldn't help but feel a little overwhelmed as she began to read the first of the letters, written to her god knows how many years ago.
Dear Santana,
I've just got to New York and it's super scary. Everyone smells funny and no one smiles back at me when I say Hi to them on the street. That's weird right? Anyways I just wanted to tell you that I miss you so so so so much! I wish you were here and I'm super sad that I had to leave. This house is really big and pretty but I miss my house in Lima. And I miss your house too. I miss the back porch and the tire swing and the smell of your mum's cooking. I miss you. I don't like it when you're not around because when you're not here all the fun goes away and I like fun, it's one of my favourite things ever.
But anyway I'm not sure what else I'm supposed to say because I've never really written a proper letter before, but I really miss you and I hope I see you really soon.
Love from Brittany S. Pierce xxx
Ps. Lord Tubbington says Hi. He's still mad at me for moving and he misses you too.
Santana must have read the letter through at least a hundred times. She wanted to memorize each and every word, hear Brittany's adorable voice in her head, picture the way she probably had her eyebrows pinched together and her tongue poking out in concentration like she always did when she wrote. She smiled and laid the letter back down before picking up the next one.
Dear Santana,
We haven't spoken in a while, so I wanted to write to you because then I can feel like I'm talking to you, even if I'm not. I don't know if I did something wrong… probably, but I'm really sorry for whatever I did. I miss you. I miss talking to you and laughing with you and holding your hand. I don't know if that's, like, weird but I do. I don't want to do that stuff with anyone here, you know? I wonder sometimes if you do that stuff with other people… Like Quinn maybe. But anyway I wanted to tell you that I always want to be the person holding your hand. You're my best friend and I love you. I hope I'm still yours too.
Brittany x
Santana hadn't noticed how much the words had affected her until she felt a single tear run down her cheek. She lifted her hand to wipe it away as she read over the words again.
I always want to be the person holding your hand.
It amazed her. Everything did; the incredible way in which Brittany's mind worked even back then, the fact that even though she must have been only twelve or thirteen, Brittany recognised their special connection long before Santana had, and the intensity with which even the simplest of words cut through her, breaking down her walls like no one else had or ever could. Those words scribbled down in Brittany's adorable hand-writing, in her favourite pink gel pen, made her feel sad; sad at how upset Brittany sounded, how much she missed Santana, and how she had thought it was her fault that they had stopped speaking. But they also made her incredibly happy at the same time, because she remembered feeling exactly the same way; feeling like nothing really made sense without Brittany by her side, linking their pinkies or holding her hand, feeling like no one else really understood her or saw her, like really saw her, and thinking that she would always be her best friend, even if they never saw each other again. But somehow, Santana always knew they would see each other again. And so when she began reading the final letter, she couldn't help but smile like a fucking idiot.
Hey Santana,
I know it's been ages – like, what three years? But I just felt like I wanted to talk to you. Actually, I kinda feel like I want to talk to you all the time. Is that weird? I don't know, but what I do know is that I miss you. And I know that's kinda crazy because we haven't even spoken in so long, and I can't explain it. But I don't care. I miss you. I miss us. You're my best friend and no one understands me like you do. So I just wanted you to know that I'm still here. I still love you and you're still my best friend.
I talked to my dad – he say's Hi by the way! – and he told me something. He told me that fate has a way of working these kinds of things out. That if two people love each other, they'll always find their way back to each other. Or something like that anyway… But I think he's right. I know I'm going to see you again and that everything will be okay.
Your best friend always,
Britt-Britt x
Santana had no idea when she had turned into such a fucking sap, with this stupid grin plastered across her face and tears filling her eyes, but here she was. She might have felt embarrassed if she wasn't so goddamn happy right now. Those words written out across the baby blue piece of paper in front of her were perfect. It was almost spooky how right Brittany had been – how she just knew that they would find each other again and that it would all end up okay – but then again, Brittany had always known things that most other people didn't.
Santana found herself blushing. Like, fucking full-on flushed cheeks and butterflies, and from just reading a few words on a piece of paper. How was that even possible? Even all those years ago, Brittany had just done things to her, had this effect on her; a hold on her so tight that looking back now, it was impossible for her to think that she could have ever let it go.
Santana took one more look over the letters laid out in her lap before folding them up carefully and placing them back into the little hand-made envelope, still grinning stupidly. She felt a new kind of strength from reading those words, a sort of realisation that even if things didn't go well with Brittany's parents, she knew everything would be okay, just like Brittany had been so sure of it all that time ago. She wondered why Brittany had never sent them to her, but more so, she wondered how she would have reacted back then, back when she was so angry and lost. But maybe right now, right in this exact moment, was actually when she needed to read them the most.
Having placed the book in the top drawer of her nightstand, Santana sunk back down against her pillows and smiled to herself. She didn't care that they had lost all those years in between then and now, because right now, just as things were, everything was perfect.
Lost in her thoughts of the girl that had changed everything for her, the girl that couldn't be more perfect if she tried, and the girl that she loved so much, Santana barely heard the front door open. She barely registered the sound of confused voices in the living room or the sound of someone crying. She only snapped properly out of her little daydream when she heard footsteps hurrying down the corridor followed by the sound of Rachel's concerned voice.
"I'll go and get Santana." Hearing these words, Santana shot upright and stared at the door, her heart racing as she waited for it to open, which it did in a matter of seconds to reveal a flustered looking Rachel. "It's Brittany." Rachel announced before Santana even had a chance to ask.
"What the fuck happened?" Santana jumped up, feeling panic rush through her.
"Santana, calm d-"
"Is she okay? Tell me she's okay." Santana interrupted her, not caring about anything else right now apart from Brittany. What the fuck was going on?
"She's okay." Thank god. "She's just… a little upset. She said something about her parents…" Fuck.
"Shit." Santana muttered as she rushed quickly passed Rachel and practically sprinted towards the living room, trying desperately to stay calm. Brittany needed her to be calm right now.
When she entered the room, her heart broke. Kurt and Quinn were sitting on the couch either side of Brittany, who had her head in her hands, sobbing as the others tried to comfort her. "Baby, what happened?" Santana gasped, trying to fight back her own threatening tears as she hurried over and knelt down in front of her girlfriend, placing her hands on her knees. Brittany didn't answer, but simply looked up, red and puffy eyes locking with brown ones for a second before she threw her arms around Santana's neck. Santana held onto her as tight as she could, ignoring the slightly awkward angle, and let her bury her face into the crook of her neck, hearing her sobbing violently. Soothingly rubbing her hands up and down her back, Santana glanced questioningly at Quinn.
"She came home and she was like this." Quinn explained in her signature soft and measured voice. "All she said was that she wanted to see you. I didn't think she should drive so I drove her here." Santana nodded, stroking her fingers softly through blonde hair as Brittany continued to grip onto her tightly.
"Thanks Q." Santana said sincerely. Quinn smiled back at her. "Baby, let's go to my room okay? Here, let me help you up." She heard Brittany sniffle and felt her nod against her shoulder as she managed to stand them both up, Brittany never loosening her vice grip around her. She smiled gratefully at the others before sliding her arm around Brittany's waist and taking her down the corridor and into her room. Sitting down on the bed, Brittany pulled Santana into another tight hug and continued to sob against her. Santana had to fight hard not to cry herself because seeing her girlfriend like this was awful. Exactly what she had been afraid of happening had happened, and now Brittany, this wonderful, sweet, beautiful girl was hurt and she couldn't bear it. "Shh…" Santana cooed, continuing to rub her hands up and down Brittany's back and comb her fingers through her hair. "It's okay, I'm here. Just let it all out, sweetie." She wanted to know what had happened, what her parents had said to make her like this, but she wasn't going to push Brittany to talk yet. She was just going to be here for her, comforting her and ready to listen when she was ready to speak.
Santana wasn't sure how much time passed like that, sitting on the bed, holding Brittany as she cried, but eventually she heard the sobs gradually slowing, her breathing getting steadier and felt the tight grip loosen slightly around her shoulders.
"I-I'm sorry." Brittany mumbled, still sniffling as she pulled away and looked down at her lap. Santana furrowed her brow and took Brittany's hand in hers.
"Baby, why are you sorry?" Santana asked, studying Brittany's features and trying to work out why on earth she felt of all things that she had to apologise. Her eyes were screwed tightly shut, her cheeks still wet with tears and her teeth were biting down hard on her lip in worry.
"I-I told them." Brittany said shakily, lifting her free hand to her cheek to wipe away some of the wetness. "And y-you warned me a-and… I shouldn't have- I shouldn't have b-because now-" Another quiet sob left Brittany's lips and Santana tightened her grip on her hand. She lifted it to her lips, placing a delicate kiss there, and smiled slightly when Brittany let out a little content sigh.
"Britt, listen. You have nothing to be sorry about okay?" Brittany nodded, her eyes still closed as took in a shaky breath. "Hey, look at me." Santana said softly, stroking her hand over Brittany's damp cheek and gently turning her face towards her. She couldn't help but smile when Brittany eventually opened her eyes to look at her because god she'd missed those eyes. Without even thinking twice about it, Santana leaned in and kissed those pouting lips softly. She just held her lips against hers, tasting the saltiness of her tears and willing away all the sadness and the worry. She felt Brittany smile slightly against the kiss before eventually pulling away just far enough to rest their foreheads together. "Tell me what happened. I'm here to talk about it if you want to." Santana told her quietly. She smiled as Brittany nodded and leaned in to kiss her once more.
"Sorry, I just wanted one more kiss first." Brittany said in an adorable little voice, making Santana giggle as they pulled apart. She took her hands again, squeezing them softly and encouraging her to explain when she felt ready. Brittany took another deep breath. "So I told them." She began quietly, watching as Santana nodded in understanding before continuing. "About us… I-I said that you're my best friend but that you're also… you're also so much more than that. And that I'm in love with you and I think I always have been." Santana couldn't help but smile at Brittany's words. Just every time she said something like that it was like she couldn't quite believe how perfect she was. "A-And I thought it was going to be fine because my dad just smiled. It was like he already knew or something." Santana nodded and smiled again because she'd had a feeling Mr. Pierce had known, but her smile immediately fell when she saw Brittany's forehead crinkle up with worry again. "But then my- my mum… She said that I was lying. That I was confused and… and that I couldn't possibly be in love with you." Santana didn't know what to say. She was angry, but more than anything she just felt so sad for Brittany. How could her own mother say that? It was one thing not to understand, but to accuse her of lying? Santana simply nodded, wanting to remain calm for Brittany's sake. She rubbed her thumbs gently over Brittany's knuckles, letting her know that it was okay to continue. "I-I tried to explain but she- she told me to leave… And my dad he just- he just sat there and so I just left and drove home and all I wanted to do was see you and now- now everything's ruined and my mum hates me!" Brittany choked out, the words tumbling from her lips and another sob escaping her. Her bottom lip trembled and Santana watched as a few little tears ran over her cheeks. She wrapped her arms around the fragile girl in front of her and pulled her into another tight hug. Brittany gripped onto Santana hard, tears wetting her t-shirt as she continued to cry.
"I'm so sorry baby." Santana whispered, hugging her girlfriend tight, never wanting to let her go. "I'm sorry your mum said those things. But she… she was just a little taken off guard. She just needs time, okay? She'll come around I promise." Another choked sob escaped Brittany's lips as she nodded against Santana's shoulder. She just hoped so much that the words she was saying were true. "She's your mum. She loves you, alright? And I love you too. I'm not going anywhere." Another little sob and a sniffle and Brittany sat back to look at Santana.
"I love you too, so much." Brittany whispered, teary blue eyes looking at Santana, like really looking at her, and she wondered how in the hell she still got butterflies when Brittany looked at her like that. "I'm so glad I have you." she added, pulling all the air from Santana's lungs as she leaned forward and crashed their lips together. Their tongues met immediately and this kiss wasn't like the last. It was hard and passionate and almost desperate. Brittany's hand immediately found the back of Santana's neck, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss, her lips attacking hers hungrily. Santana could feel how much Brittany wanted her, how much she needed her right now, and it made her heart pound in her chest like it was trying desperately to keep up with everything. She needed her just as much, she needed to show her just how much she loved her and how she would always be there for her, and she kissed her back with just as much passion. When Brittany sucked on her bottom lip her head was spinning; all she could think and feel was Brittany. Brittany, who did things to her nobody else did and who drove her crazy like no one ever had, and Brittany, who was so upset right now and needed her more than ever. Shit.
"Britt-" Santana breathed as Brittany's kisses left her lips and began peppering all over her face – her cheeks, her nose, her forehead. "Brittany." Santana managed to get out a little louder as she felt those perfect lips attach to her neck. Desperately fighting to ignore the burning sensation in the pit of her stomach because god Brittany drove her crazy, she took Brittany's hands and squeezed them. Brittany paused her movements and lifted her head to look at Santana questioningly, darkened blue eyes flicking between her own. "We- we should… you should get some rest, baby." Santana told her in between heavy breaths, watching as Brittany's features softened.
"Santana-" Brittany replied, her lips curving up into a little smile as she leaned in to reattach their lips once again.
"Britt, I wanna take care of you." Santana said, still breathing heavily as she placed her hand softly on Brittany's shoulder to stop her movements, even though it was killing her right now. "And this would be-"
"Exactly what I need." Brittany interrupted her, still smiling. "Santana, you… you've already helped so much and… and I need you right now." She told her and the low tone to her voice was doing nothing to ease the heat burning through every inch of Santana's body.
"I need you too, Britt, but-"
"Please, Santana." Brittany said, her voice so sexy right now and the Latina knew she'd lost this battle. "I just… I need you." She husked again, leaning in slowly and finding Santana's neck with her lips once more. She sucked on the skin just below her jaw, eliciting a low moan from Santana's lips as her head tilted backwards. "I really… fucking… need you." Brittany told her again in between kisses and Santana lost it; she wanted give Brittany everything. She needed to. She tugged at Brittany's shirt, pulling her towards her and crashing their lips together again. She kissed her furiously, hearing her inhale sharply which only turned her on even more.
"I fucking… need you too." She panted breathlessly, hearing a little moan escape Brittany's lips as she slid her hands underneath her shirt. Santana felt that familiar heat gathering between her legs as her hands brushed up over Brittany's stomach, before cupping those perfect breasts over her bra. Santana heard Brittany take in another sharp breath as she brushed her fingers over her nipples, pinching them over the thin fabric and eliciting a little whimper in response that drove Santana wild. "Lie down." Santana told her in a low whisper, hearing the desire lacing her own voice and watching as Brittany nodded before lowering herself down onto the bed. Santana followed, climbing on top of her and kissing her hungrily again. "I love you… so fucking much." Santana husked into Brittany's ear as she left her lips and began trailing kisses down her neck. She couldn't get enough the soft moans that left Brittany's throat each time she sucked or bit down gently. She moved her kisses down, pushing up Brittany's shirt a little to place feather-light pecks across her toned stomach, loving the way her abs tightened and quivered under her touch.
Soon both girls were just in their underwear and Santana couldn't remember the last time she'd needed someone so much. Straddling her waist, Santana felt like she had to touch Brittany everywhere; her hands explored the bare skin of her stomach, brushed lightly over her arms, her lips drew a path down her neck, her collarbone, as Brittany breathed heavily underneath her. Lifting herself up a little, Brittany undid the clasp of her bra and tossed the garment somewhere onto the floor. Santana wasted no time in sliding her hands up to cup her breasts, brushing her thumbs over her hard nipples and pinching gently. The sharp gasp she received in response sent another rush of heat through her body and she was so fucking turned on right now. She couldn't get enough of Brittany. She just needed her so much. Santana leant down, replacing her fingers with her lips and pressing a feather light kiss to Brittany's nipple, hearing her gasp again.
"Oh god-" She heard Brittany moan helplessly as she wrapped her lips around her nipple and sucked hard. She flicked her tongue out hard over the stiff peak and Brittany was now squirming underneath her. "Santana I- fuck I just need you so much... Please-" Brittany whimpered and Santana could already feel herself pooling in her underwear. She wasn't going to deny Brittany anything right now, not that she even could if she wanted to, and she didn't hesitate to move her kisses lower. She heard Brittany's breathing getting even faster as she travelled lower down her stomach, and the gasp she heard when she pressed her lips against Brittany's damp underwear did nothing to help the wetness pooling between her own legs. After a few more carefully placed kisses and soft nips, Brittany was almost shaking, and Santana loved that she had this effect on her. She tugged at the material with her teeth, before pulling it the rest of the way down Brittany's legs with her hands, and threw it to the floor. She couldn't help but let out a moan when Brittany's legs parted immediately, letting her see just how wet and ready for her she was. Santana was sure she was soaked herself because god she loved Brittany's body.
She leaned down and began dusting soft kisses up the insides of Brittany's thighs, hearing delicious little whimpers in response. Her heart was pounding in her chest and she could hardly breathe, but it was a good feeling. It was a fucking great feeling, and so without warning she pushed Brittany's legs further apart and placed a delicate kiss to her most sensitive spot, fighting back another moan when she heard Brittany gasp loudly. She pushed her tongue against her, running it flat through her wet folds before flicking it hard over her clit.
"Oh god Santana-" Brittany gasped out as Santana began drawing slow circles around that spot. She placed her hands on Brittany's hips to hold her still because she was now squirming in the hottest way possible, Santana's tongue alternating between soft circles and hard, determined strokes. Hearing the short, sharp breaths escaping Brittany's lips and feeling her getting wetter and wetter beneath her touch was sending arousal shooting through Santana's body. She glanced up to see Brittany staring back at her with hooded eyes, her bare chest heaving and her cheeks flushed pink. God so fucking hot.
She placed another kiss to her clit before moving her tongue down and pushing it inside. Brittany let out a loud, strangled moan, and god Santana was fucking wet now.
"Fuck, so good." Brittany breathed out shakily as Santana curled her tongue, brushing it against Brittany's walls and feeling her thighs tremble around her as little whimpers left the blonde's mouth. "Santana I'm- I'm so close already- fuck-" Brittany gasped out as Santana continued thrusting her tongue in and out slowly. Her words just sent another wave of arousal rushing through Santana and she withdrew her tongue, only to replace it with two fingers, and heard Brittany let out a beautiful, high-pitched moan. Pushing her fingers in and out, she returned her lips to Brittany's clit, running the tip of her tongue over it and drawing breathless gasps from her. Curling her fingers inside her like she had done with her tongue, she stroked that spot over and over again, making Brittany writhe and shake under her touch. "I'm gonna- shit I'm-" Brittany panted out, her words cut off by a loud gasp when Santana's lips wrapped around her clit and sucked hard. The only sounds leaving Brittany's mouth now were breathless whimpers of her name, over and over again, as Santana continued to suck at her sensitive spot, while fluttering her fingers inside of her.
Santana knew she was almost there when she felt Brittany's legs begin to tremble either side of her head. She thrust her fingers in as deep as they would go, curling them again as she sucked harder on her clit. Brittany's hands shot up to her hair when Santana flicked her tongue out and suddenly she felt her whole body tense. Looking up, Santana's breath caught in her throat when she saw Brittany with her head tilted back against the pillows, eyes pinched shut, and mouth open slightly as increasingly breathless moans filled the silence. Santana sped up her movements as Brittany's back arched, her hips lifting into her, and with one last high-pitched moan Brittany came hard on her fingers. She kept a steady rhythm, thrusting her fingers slowly and drawing lazy circles with her tongue, watching in awe as waves of pleasure shuddered through Brittany's perfect body.
After what seemed like ages, Brittany finally relaxed again and she fell back against the sheets, her bare chest rising and falling as she took in deep, shaky breaths.
"Oh my god." Brittany breathed out, a lopsided smile stretched across her lips as Santana crawled her way back up her body and collapsed next to her, an equally stupid grin plastered across her own face.
"You're so beautiful." Santana told her, placing a delicate kiss to her shoulder and grinning as Brittany smiled bashfully.
"I love you so much." Brittany said, still panting a little as she turned on her side to face Santana.
"I love you too, Britt-Britt." Santana said softly, smiling back at her and kissing her again just because she had to. "And everything's going to be okay, I promise. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere." Brittany smiled too, sliding one arm around Santana's bare waist and pulling her closer.
"Thank you." Brittany whispered, that beautiful little smile still playing at her lips as her fingers drew lazy patterns over Santana's stomach. "What?" She asked around her smile as she noticed the stupid grin still stretched across Santana's face.
"Can I tell you something?" Brittany nodded and propped herself up on her elbow, looking at Santana intently. "I found your letters…" Santana announced quietly, smiling as she saw the hint of pink appear on Brittany's cheeks.
"I actually kinda hoped you would…" Brittany admitted shyly, blushing fiercely now and looking down bashfully. "Did you… did you like them?"
"Britt, I loved them. I mean… Everything you wrote, all those things you said, I was feeling it all too, you know… I felt it every day and I missed you every day." She watched as Brittany's lips curved up into a larger smile. "And… you know I always want to be the person holding your hand as well." Santana told her, reaching down and lacing her fingers with Brittany's. Brittany beamed back at her, her lightly freckled cheeks still blushing pink as she squeezed Santana's fingers. "Just… how come you never sent them?" Brittany looked down for a second, chewing on her bottom lip in thought before lifting her gaze back to Santana.
"I don't really know. I guess I was just scared." She admitted quietly.
"Of what baby?" Brittany shrugged.
"I don't know… That you wouldn't feel the same I guess? Or maybe that I shouldn't be feeling all those things and that you wouldn't want me telling you them? Or that you're just so awesome and pretty and none of my words written down could ever explain that properly and okay, I'm rambling now I'll shut up." She mumbled, blushing even harder and making Santana laugh.
"You're amazing." Santana simply replied, so in awe of the girl lying next to her, and the effect she'd always had on her. "What?" Santana asked, giggling affectionately at Brittany who was now hiding her face in her hands. "Seriously, what?" She asked again around her grin as she pried Brittany's hands away.
"I just… I don't even know how to explain it. Like, when you say things to me it's like so many butterflies having a celebration party in my stomach." Brittany told her before rolling onto her back and covering her face with her hands again. Santana couldn't help but smile stupidly back at her because she was just so helplessly in love with this girl.
"Come here." Santana told her, taking her hand and pulling her back towards her, before kissing her deeply, feeling Brittany smile against her lips. "Everything's going to be okay, because I am so in love with you." Santana said when they finally broke apart. "You really have no idea."
"Actually I think I do."
…