I once had a girl

Or should I say

She once had me…

And when I woke

I was alone

The bird had flown

Demelza had the cab drop her off a few stores away from the bar. Not just because she wanted to surprise her friends with her return but because she needed a few extra minutes to calm down. The entire trip back to the states was a rollercoaster of emotions. They ran the gamut from hate for Ross Poldark and all the people she trusted, to hurt towards those same people, to sadness that the happiness she'd experienced since meeting the Brit could end so abruptly. All he had to do was tell her the truth. Just like her other friends should have done. She came to terms with why they lied to her but not why Ross would. He knew that next to him, her father was the most important person in her life. For him to decide that she didn't need to know something as important as the fact that he was ill was what she couldn't accept. She would never lie to him about a member of his family. And to top it off the fact that Elizabeth knew about it and shared the info with a person who she knew had a vendetta was the straw that broke her back and resolve.

On the plane, between crying and raging, she knew she should have stayed and hashed it out with him, but after reading Dwight's email and dealing with the smug Ruth Teague, she wasn't thinking clearly; if she had seen Ross at that point she probably would have clocked him possibly giving him a scar to match the one already on his face. When she landed she was tempted to call the idiot but decided against it because if anyone needed to make the first move towards an explanation, it was Ross. Now as she walked slowly up the block, taking in the surroundings that she grew up with, Demelza steeled herself for whatever was going to greet her at home.

There was a smell of winter in the air even though it was still only fall adding to the chill that Demelza felt in her bones. She was nearing the door to the bar, fearing what she was going to walk in on. First in her mind was that her father was sicker than Dwight told Ross in his email and that he was on the brink of death. If that were the case, she'd hate Ross even more. The second was that, if things were running smoothly, did she just leave the man she loved and a marriage for nothing? Reaching the bar she was about to push in the door when it opened from the other side.

"Demelza? What the hell are you doing here?"

She was greeted by the smiling but surprised face of Verity. Verity didn't wait for an answer but pulled Demelza into the bar and into a hug that was not immediately returned. Unable to resist the warmth of her friend, Demelza dropped her bags and clung to Verity, a low sob escaping from her. That slowly turned into a steady cry and Verity held on to her friend as she released all that had been pent up inside her.

"Ssh, Dem, it's okay. Let it out. It's okay," Verity said.

Demelza didn't answer but let the tears flow.

"Let's sit down, Dem."

Verity steered her to a table away from the door. Demelza sat down while Verity went to the bar and got a bottle and couple of shot glasses. She put the bottle on the table and took a seat opposite Demelza who has stopped crying and was now wiping her face with a napkin. Verity opened the bottle and poured two shots of Bushmill's. Verity handed one glass to Demelza, lifting the other in what seemed to be a toast.

"Drink it Demelza. You look like you could use it," Verity said.

Looking at the glass in her hand Demelza did what Verity said and knocked back the liquid, letting it burn as it went down. Without a word, she poured another one, taking it down just as swiftly as the first.

"I'm such an idiot, Vee," Demelza said when she went to pour another, not caring that she had no food in her stomach which made the liquor hit her system quicker.

"Yes, you are, Demelza if you're here and not in the UK with James Bond. What exactly did he say when you told him you were leaving?"

Swallowing the third shot without flinching, Demelza put the glass down and lifted her gaze to meet Verity's.

"You did tell him you were leaving, didn't you?" Verity asked

"Yes. Except, I didn't 'tell' him exactly. I left him a note," Demelza admitted.

"Jesus Christ, Dem! This isn't some soap opera in need of dramatics. This is your life. And Ross's life. Even I have to admit that was a coward's way to handle things. I'm surprised at you."

"I know but I couldn't face him, Vee. I was so angry that I if I saw him then I'd do or say something that would make us hate each other," Demelza confessed.

"You're an idiot. That boy could never hate you. He loves you too much," Verity said.

Demelza looked at her friend knowing that she was right. She knew Ross loved her but in the heat of the moment including dealing with Ruth Teague, she wasn't thinking of his love; just his deception.

"Demelza, do you have any idea exactly why Dwight and Ross did what they did? They both knew that if you found out about your dad before your trip you wouldn't go," Verity said.

"That right. What does that tell you? Ross obviously wanted this trip to happen no matter what else was going on," Demelza retorted.

"Yes, he did. Dwight agreed that you couldn't do anything for your dad anyway at this point so why not go and be with the man you love. It was only a trip Demelza. You weren't moving. Yet."

Sipping her drink, Verity gave Demelza a look which relayed that she knew what was in her friend's future. Demelza sighed unable to deny what Verity was saying.

"What if something had happened?" Demelza asked.

"But it didn't. Ross and Dwight have been talking during your whole trip. Do you really think if your dad took a turn for the worst, James Bond wouldn't tell you? We thought you deserved this trip Dem. Do you really regret going?"

Verity knew her friend as well as she knew herself. There was no thought that the trip was anything but the best decision Demelza made.

"No Vee. It was amazing. Ross was amazing. I never thought I could love someone like this. Why did he have to go and ruin it?' she cried.

Shaking her head Verity spoke up.

"He didn't Dem. You did. By running away. You need to call him," she said.

"I can't. I don't know what to say."

"Bull. You know exactly what to say. It's not in your usual vocabulary but try and spit it out. I believe the words are 'I'm sorry Ross'." Verity did not soft soap it but let Demelza hear the truth.

"I need time. He's probably so pissed off at me he won't take my call. Or my apology. Let me clear my head and then I'll figure it out. Oh and I need to take care of Lizzie too," she said.

Verity was confused how their mutual friend figured into this situation.

"What did she do?"

"Oh, you know. Her standard meddling to make people miserable routine. But first I need to check on the house and go see my dad. Will you come with me?" Demelza asked.

"Sure. You head on home and I'll get things settling with Jinny," Verity said, standing up from the table.

Demelza also rose and stretched; her body was tight from the flight and she was feeling weary.

"Ok. I'll go and see what's going on there. Hopefully, Dwight is around so I can give him a smack to."

Verity rolled her eyes at her friend.

"Whatever you say, Dem."

Giving her a hug, Demelza rolled her suitcase towards the door to head on home. She paused just as she reached the sidewalk to check her phone. There were no messages.

"What in the world is that boy thinking of?"

Prudie was making a pot of coffee when she saw the paper on the kitchen table. Staring back at her was a picture of her boss and surrogate son with that viper in Versace, Ruth Teague. It was just the latest in a string of nights out with his old circle of friends that had Ross making the gossip rags. What surprised Prudie was that he was back to this old ways so quickly. Demelza had been gone almost two weeks. During this time the sweet, happy young man who returned from America was replaced by the obnoxious and seemingly reckless boy of a year ago. She knew why he was like this as did Ross but he wouldn't admit what was needed to fix it.

She was sitting at the table, sipping her tea, reading the story when the man of the hour came in. Prudie looked up and saw that Ross looked terrible. His skin was sallow, what could be seen of it under the beard that he let grow without tending. The curls that normally were boyish in their wildness now appeared unkempt. But what was most noticeable was the dullness in his eyes. Gone was the sparkle that she'd seen when Demelza was around. She was tempted to say something but realized she didn't have to once Ross sat down opposite her and kept his head down. He grabbed a mug and poured a cup of the coffee Prudie had made and gulped it down black and harsh.

"So you've been gallivanting with that slag in designer clothes while the girl you love is home dealing with her dying father, alone. I never thought I'd see the day you'd turn into your father," Prudie said.

There was not only disappointment in her voice but also a tinge of disgust. Ross looked at her, the pain clear in his face knowing what Prudie said was true.

"I am not like my father, Prudie. There you are very much mistaken. As for Demelza, she left me, remember? And I haven't heard from her since. It's been weeks. She could call or text if she wanted me. It seems clear that she doesn't," Ross replied.

"And you could stop being stubborn and do the same. I swear you are both cut from the same cloth. You're perfect for each other," she said as she rose to start clearing the kitchen.

"Apparently she doesn't think so," he answered.

Without turning around to face him, Prudie continued. She was slamming drawers and cabinets, making cutlery and dishes rattle.

"You're being foolish and childish. Call her!"

Ross sat at the table, swirling the last of the coffee in his cup, then stated simply, "Not yet."

She whipped around, hands on hips and stared at him.

"Why? Is your head, either the one on your neck or in your pants so taken with Ruth Teague that you'll throw this relationship away?"

Prudie was practically screaming at him but Ross let her go. He held his tongue not only because that comment didn't warrant an answer. Let her think the worst of him. He knew the truth. He knew that Ruth Teague was nothing more than a pawn. Someone was out to hurt both he and Demelza and ruin the life they were building. His mission was to find out who that was and how she knew so much about Demelza's family situation. Ross had a fairly good idea of who it was but needed solid confirmation before he went to Demelza.

"If you must know Prudie, although it's really none of your business, Ruth Teague means nothing to me. Except to find out who is determined to hurt Demelza," Ross explained.

Prudie was confused and walked back to the table to face Ross more closely.

"How could going out with that woman help you get back the person you love?"

"By leading me to the real villain in this. Ruth isn't smart enough to do things on her own. I know that someone else would do anything to injure Demelza and me. It's she who I'm after. I just need Ruth to give her to me."

Now it was Ross who stood to put his cup in the sink. He leaned on the stainless steel edge, gripping it until his knuckles turned white. Prudie began to understand that everything her boss and friend did since Demelza's departure was to rectify things.

"Why would someone go to those lengths? Who did you make mad now Ross?"

The concerned surrogate mother reappeared to which Ross was grateful.

"An American viper, Prudie. Someone who hates Demelza enough to hurt her through me."

He rejoined Prudie at the table and gave her the condensed version of his time in Rockaway, his encounter with Lizzie, her history with Demelza and why he thinks she latched on to Ruth. From what he could gather during his "dates" with Ruth, someone wants to push Demelza to the limits so that she feels the loss of Ross and perhaps even her business. Then they could swoop in and take them both. Whoever is steering Ruth wants Demelza to feel humiliated by losing things she loves. Every instinct told him that it was Lizzie.

"Lizzie finds it unacceptable that I didn't fall for her 'charms' and she is working whatever angle she can to split Demelza and myself up. What Lizzie doesn't know is that no matter how tough things are between Demelza and me, she will never come between us," Ross said.

It was not lost on Prudie that whenever Ross said Demelza's name his voice softened and his eyes lit up just a bit.

"So you are saying that this woman is trying to destroy Demelza just because you didn't sleep with her?" Prudie asked.

"Yes."

Prudie contemplates all this.

"Is there something in the air in Rockaway that makes people batty?"

Ross shrugged his shoulders and smiled. It was the first time Prudie saw him smile in days.

"So how do you plan on fixing this?" she asked.

Sitting back in the chair, Ross picked up a scone and picked at it, making crumbs on the table. Normally Prudie would scold him for making a mess but she let him go.

"Well, Ruth believes that she and I are back to where we were before I left for the states thanks to Liz's manipulations. Tonight I am going to tell her that whatever Liz said or promised her is a lie. That the plan didn't work and be done with her," he said.

"And then? What about Demelza?"

Ross looked up at Prudie, the scone now disintegrated, and gave Prudie his best Ross Poldark smirk.

"Don't worry about Demelza. I will get her back. All these meetings I've been working on are for her."

"You think she'll just fall back in your arms when you haven't even checked to see how she is doing or what is going on with her father?"

"I may not have spoken to her directly but Dwight and Verity have been filling me in on what is happening. I will call her soon. She needed to hate me," he explained.

Prudie just shook her head.

"That logic is asinine," she quipped.

"To most people that would be true. But I know Demelza. She needed to work through that hate in her head to see the logic."

"You're both mad," Prudie said.

"Yes, we are."

Getting up from the table, Ross worked around the table and gives Prudie a kiss on the cheek. She, in turn, reached up and gave him a hug when they heard the doorbell ring. Separating, both of them more than a little emotional, Ross motioned for Prudie to stay put. He started to walk out but stopped at the door to make one final point.

"I love her Prudie. I miss her more than you know. And I will get her back."

Ross went to the door and opened it expecting one of his assistants, not the person who stood there.

"Ross, love."

It was Ruth. Ross did his best to plaster on a smile and not let her sense that she was the last person he wanted to see.

"Ruth? What are you doing here? Isn't this a little early for you?"

He opened the door wide as she breezed past him, stopped briefly to give him a perfunctory kiss on the lips, and walked through the house as if she belonged there.

"I know. I'd still be having a lie in if I didn't have something important to do," she said as she sat down on the sofa, patting the spot next to her.

Ross took a moment and then realized that she was giving him a signal to join her. He went over to where she was and sat down but made sure to leave enough of a gap between them so that he wouldn't have to touch her.

"I know you promised me a quiet romantic dinner because you wanted to discuss something, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to disappoint you."

Again, hiding his relief, Ross nodded to acknowledge what she said.

"That's too bad. Is it work?" he asked even though he knew she didn't really have a job. Running her family's trust was not a career. It just kept Ruth occupied but in the midst of the social circle, she loved so much.

"In a way. I have to go to some stupid reception because my mother has a migraine. I'd take you love, but I know how much you hate these things."

She reached over to grasp his hand and Ross tried to not show how uncomfortable he was. If it wasn't for Demelza and the need to get to the bottom of Ruth's game playing, he'd have been done with her already.

"You're right. Besides this will give me time to finish up some work I've let go since we've been seeing each other," he said.

"Oh, how sweet. You put off work for me," Ruth said as she leaned towards him anticipating a kiss.

When her eyes closed Ross stood up and walked to the small desk in the corner on the pretense of checking the mail. He was ready to be done with this charade so he could go to Demelza and get their lives back on track. Taking a breath he knew that he had to end this with Ruth sooner rather than later. He glanced over at Ruth who finally realized he wasn't going to kiss her when she felt a shift in the seat and no lips on her face. Not quite understanding what Ross was doing she sat staring at him, waiting for an explanation.

"Ross is something wrong?" she asked.

Before he could answer, she pulled out her compact and freshened up her lip gloss, not really paying attention to him. This was typical Ruth behavior; if something didn't pertain directly to her, she lost interest quickly. Ross was done. He was going to touch on this subject gently but now he was ready to rip the bandage off.

"Yes, Ruth there is. I want to know who you've been talking to in the states about Demelza and me."

Leaning against the desk, he put his hands in his pockets to keep them steady. He was afraid that her answer would set him off and that was the last thing he wanted. What he wanted was her to confess so he could confirm his suspicions and move on.

"What? Who would I be talking to about your runaway fiancée?"

Her tone was casual but it was clear that she was getting defensive which to Ross meant she was guilty of something.

"I would appreciate it if you didn't speak about Demelza like that. In fact, don't mention her at all."

Ruth was stunned at his attitude and moved to remind him of what was right in front of him and what they had. Leaving her purse on the sofa, she went to where he stood and put her body flush against his. Ross wanted to push her away but let her continue with this poor attempt at seduction. Surely she must realize that he wasn't interested in her that way. Or any way for that matter. For the time they'd been socializing since Demelza left, he made sure to keep the physical contact as minimalistic as possible. Not only because he was committed to Demelza but because he found Ruth unattractive in the most basic sense: her heart was ugly. Outwardly she was pretty. In the past, Ross found that was enough to motivate him towards a physical relationship with a woman. But now that he'd found real and true love, he knew what seemed to be the most important thing to him just a year ago was the least important thing to him.

"Ross, what's come over you? I thought you were finally over that little beach bum and were ready to settle back into the life you were born to," Ruth said.

He knew she was grasping to keep his attention and he was amused by it.

"Clearly you don't know me at all Ruth. This life that I was born to has brought me nothing but loneliness and sadness. And that 'beach bum' as you call her has more life and love in her than you can understand. So now back to my original question. How long have you and Elizabeth Chenoweth been conspiring to make Demelza's life miserable?"

This time he did move her aside so he could walk across the room. He came to stand by the bay window that looked out towards the sea and his heart ached as he was reminded of Demelza.

"Who?"

"Give it up, Ruth. I already knew what was going on from the day Demelza left as well as what I've heard from my friends in New York. What I don't know is why? Why would you do this?"

"Are you serious? You left me Ross after years of our being together! Left me to go to the states where you take up with some gold digging little slut who has nothing to offer you! Liz told me that you even turned her down when she could offer you so much more! What does that girl have over you Ross? I thought you proposed because she might have been pregnant and that was why she left but Liz tells me she doubts that's true because she's been closing her father's bar every night."

Ross spun around to see Ruth smiling at him.

"See Ross I'm saving you from a humiliating situation. That girl isn't the wife for you," she added.

"And I suppose you think you are?" he spits out.

"Frankly yes, I do," she replied.

"And where does John Treneglos fit in this situation, Ruth? Are you planning on juggling both of us? Last time I checked the law, bigamy was illegal."

That did it. Ruth turned beet red at the mention of the other man's name.

"What has John to do with anything? We're friends."

"Is that so? Well, he told me that you were more than friends. In fact isn't that the person you're seeing tonight? And why you had no problem with our not sleeping together all these weeks? Because you were already sleeping with him?"

Ruth's mouth dropped open as if she was going to refute what Ross just said, but she stayed silent. Ross walked towards her and he saw her shrink away. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel threatened because that could send her into another tailspin of stories.

"Tell me, Ruth."

Ross was insistent but remained calm. It was during this discussion that Prudie came to stand by door once again witnessing Ruth Teague in all her glory. As she saw with Demelza, Ross also didn't back down but was going to hold this woman accountable for her actions.

"Fine. John and I have been seeing each other. Why shouldn't we? This thing with you was really for Liz. I knew that nothing would come of it, but she paid me a lot of money to keep you out in the public eye with me. She made sure that paparazzi were around to take pictures so that she could show Demelza you weren't home pining for her. I didn't really care about any of you. I just wanted a little revenge for having put up with you and your father for so long and never getting what I was promised," she said.

Her voice rose as she went on becoming shrill which was beyond unpleasant. Ross stood in shock looking at her seeing a woman that he didn't recognize. He now wondered how he could ever have thought of her as a possible partner in life.

"What were you promised Ruth?"

Ross was curious as to what the catalyst was to her actions besides money.

"I was promised that you would marry me, making me the lady of Nampara."

She had calmed down, her voice sounding embarrassed as she confessed.

"Who promised you that because it surely wasn't me?" Ross asked.

When she didn't answer he knew the answer to that question.

"My father. Of course. You would be the wife he would pick out for me. Well, I'm sorry you were led down that path because I never had any intention of marrying you, Ruth. I never loved you the way a man should love a woman and I know you never loved me. If you did, you wouldn't be working so hard to hurt me now."

Ruth suddenly felt like the wind was knocked out of her and she made her way back to the sofa to sit down. Never in all her years had anyone spoken to her like this especially not a man. She straightened her back and looked at Ross putting on her best-wounded face for his benefit. He went to sit next to her so that his words were not misconstrued.

"Nice try Ruth but that won't work. It never did. So here's what you are going to do. First, you're going to call your partner in crime and tell her that you've finished working for her. Tell her you've dumped me. Tell her anything you want as to why; she won't care. All she'll care about is that her plan worked," Ross said.

"But it hasn't worked. You're still in love with that little red head, aren't you? And you never had any intention of giving us a second chance," Ruth said.

"Now you're getting it. I do want to thank you though. These past few weeks of being back in Cornwall and seeing what my life is supposed to have been like proved to me that leaving was the best decision I ever made. I didn't go to the states looking for a relationship; it just happened. But I'm glad it did because I have never known such contentment. That is until you and Liz decided that Demelza and I shouldn't be happy because you both weren't."

She couldn't say anything because everything he said was right.

"Well, you seem to have this all figured out. So there is nothing left for me to say is there?"

Grabbing her purse Ruth stood and walked to the door coming face to face with Prudie, who stepped aside and pointed to the door.

"Goodbye Ross. I hope you know what you're doing. That girl will never fit in here. She will never be one of us," Ruth said smugly.

"I hope not. The last thing I want is a carbon copy of you," Ross responded.

Huffing at his cutting remark, Ruth stomped down the hall to the door, leaving it open as she left.

Prudie gave her boss a pleased looked then went back to the kitchen. Ross pulled out his phone and quickly typed a text. Hitting the send button he didn't look at the screen again but hoped the message reached its destination and was understood.

The weeks passed quickly since Demelza got that one and only message from Ross. It said simply, I miss you, I love you XOXO R. She knows she should have deleted it. Instead, she kept it and read it every night before she went to sleep as her fingers hovered over the keypad of her phone, tempted to return the sentiment. Something held her back. Her heart ached, not just because of Ross but because she knew the time was fast approaching when she'd have to lose another person in her life. Demelza was not sure how she was going to handle that goodbye. She really needed Ross but refused to call him to rescue her. She was used to dealing with things on her own. She did it before she met Ross Poldark and she'd do it now.

It was the day before Thanksgiving and Demelza was preoccupied with organizing things for the open house dinner she and Verity were going to serve at the bar for those who had no place to go. She was also preparing a basic dinner to take her dad at the hospice because Demelza knew he wouldn't eat whatever they were serving. It has been a trying time since she returned from Cornwall. After dealing with the reprimands from Verity for leaving Ross the way she did, Demelza tried to focus on getting her life organized for when the inevitable happened. She worked with Verity as well as Dwight and Andrew to get the books in order to make sure that there were enough resources to get through the winter months. They decided to open for Christmas day for the same reason they are opening for Thanksgiving: to give people who were alone a place to go. How ironic Demelza thought since this year she felt more alone than ever. She felt empty. Working and spending time with her dad were automatic actions; it was as if she was walking in her sleep.

She was feeling like that at the moment when Dwight walked into the apartment with Garrick at his heels. As has been the dog's habit, he trotted around the apartment seemingly on the hunt for Ross. When he couldn't find him, he'd take up residence on the couch, his head hanging over the arm forlornly.

"Hey there, Dem. Answered Ross yet?" he asked as he put bags of groceries on the counter.

Giving him a death glare, Demelza answered, "No. And even if I did I wouldn't tell you."

"Why?"

"You have a big mouth, Enys. And if you must know, I don't know what to say," Demelza answered.

Her voice was low and sounded wounded. Dwight came to where she sat at the table, put his hands on her shoulders and leaned down, putting his mouth next to her ear.

"You love him Demelza."

Dwight moved around to take the seat next to her and grabbed her hand.

"Says who? He lied to me Dwight," she said.

"Get over it. It's been weeks. You can't hate him forever," Dwight said.

"I can if I want," Demelza said defiantly.

Dwight sat back and took stock of her appearance, a grin coming to his face.

"And that's why you're wearing his clothes, right?"

He waited for her to come up with an answer to that as she looked down at her outfit and realized he was right. She was wearing his Coldplay t-shirt and favorite gray sweats.

"They're comfortable," she stated.

"Bullshit. You miss him, Dem. That's why you're living here instead of upstairs, isn't it?"

"No smarty pants. There's too much space upstairs. Besides, Garrick seems to have gotten used to this place," she said trying to justify her actions.

"Uh huh, if you say so. Just call him already Dem. I know he misses you," Dwight said regretting the confession as soon as it slipped out of his mouth.

"How do you know? If he missed me so much he'd be here. With me. While I watch my father die."

She barely got the words out as she broke down again. Dwight immediately went to hug her, standing up and pulling her up with him. He guided her to the couch, forcing Garrick to the floor.

"Demelza, you have to believe me that if Ross could be here he would," Dwight said.

"How do you know so much about what my ex-fiancé is doing, huh?"

The tears had stopped and now she was curious as to just what part her supposed best friend had in this whole mess.

"You know that Ross and I became friends despite our initial lack of trust. But once I saw how he felt about you I couldn't help but fall for his charms too," he teased.

Demelza appreciated his attempt at humor.

"Well then maybe you should marry him, Dwight," she replied.

"At least I would tell him how I feel even if it was that I hated him," Dwight said to her.

Demelza moved away from him so that she could see his face. She was about to snap at him when the door opened again and Verity came in, carrying a six-pack and a pizza.

"Hey kids, what's up?" she asked without really looking at the scene in front of her.

The occupants on the couch just stared at her waiting for her to realize that something was going on. She was oblivious as she headed to the kitchen chattering away.

"So the bar is all set for tomorrow. Jim and Jinny are prepping the food, and I've got Andrew on table set ups. I told him he could come here later if everything got done. Then I had a craving for a sausage and mushroom pizza because it's the only thing I could think of that was a total opposite to turkey and stuffing. Well maybe except for Chinese food but I really wanted a beer and we all know fried rice doesn't always go with Stella."

During her monologue, Verity had managed to put three slices of pie on plates and cracked open three bottles of the beer. With the skill that came from waiting tables for so long, she carried all items to where Dwight and Demelza sat, placed them on the table and then dropped to the floor. It was only then when no one had said anything that she looked up and saw that something was going on with her friends.

"Ok, something's wrong. Oh God, Dem, it's not Tom is it?" she said between bites and gulps.

Demelza burst into laughter, finally feeling a bit of the weight she'd been carrying lift. Picking up one of the bottles she tipped it to her lips and took a long drink. As the cool liquid slid down her throat her mind went back to the last time she drank a Stella; on a beach in Cornwall the day Ross proposed. Closing her eyes, she felt tears gathering but pressed her fingers to her lids, forcing them to stay put.

"No Vee, dad is still hanging on. But it seems our friend here thinks I should call James Bond and apologize for running out on him," Demelza said, her words dripping with her usual sarcasm.

"Oh good. Then it's not that you saw the internet or something," Verity said between bites.

Dwight and Demelza exchanged a look wondering what their mutual friend was talking about. Verity realized that the conversation stopped causing her to look up at the two of them.

"What are you talking about Verity?" Dwight asked.

Putting down her food, Verity got up and went to her bag to retrieve her phone. Swiping the screen, she glanced down and walked back to the pair where she handed it to Demelza. Dwight leaned over her shoulder to see a photo of Ross and some woman coming out of a club. The picture was blurry but it didn't take a rocket scientist to see that Ross looked terrible. Paler and thinner. He took it from Demelza whose hand was shaking.

"Well, that could explain why I only got one message from him. He's been too busy partying to think of me. Guess that little witch got her claws into him anyway."

Demelza's voice was tight but she didn't fool either of her friends; they knew she was hurt but was trying to cover it and failing. They also knew that what she was looking at shouldn't be taken seriously.

"Demelza, don't believe everything you see. It's just a picture," Dwight said trying to be the voice of reason.

"Yes, Dwight it is a picture. Of my fiancé, excuse me, ex-fiance, with some tiny little brunette on his arm. He doesn't look like he's thinking about anything but another drink and getting laid."

She swilled her beer as Dwight and Verity looked at each other knowing that they needed to tell her they'd heard from Ross. Dwight was glad that Verity was there as back up. He knew that Demelza couldn't fight both of them when she knew they were right. Demelza looked back over her shoulder and saw the smug look on her friend's face and didn't appreciate it.

"What are you two up to? You're hiding something, I can tell. So spill," she insisted, taking another gulp.

"Dem, Ross hasn't been just out partying. He's been checking in regularly with us. Wondering how you were doing," Dwight confessed.

She looked between her friends but said nothing. Was this another instance of them keeping secrets from her? She wanted to be mad but she couldn't. She knew that Ross wouldn't call her first; he'd let her make the decision as to when they would reconnect. She leaned over the table took a bite of the pizza, not realizing how hungry she was. No one spoke as Demelza ate, letting the tension in the room ease. After a few moments, Verity couldn't take the quiet anymore and was about to speak up when Demelza spoke first.

"You two are just so clever, aren't you? Tag teaming me to break down and call Poldark?"

"So when are you going to call him?"

Dropping the crust on her plate, Demelza swallowed the last of her beer and leaned back against the couch.

"I don't know Vee," she said honestly.

Seeing her friend's dilemma, Verity got up, moved to the couch and pushed Dwight out of the way. She took a seat next to Demelza and put her arm around her shoulder.

"Demelza, you have to know in your heart what the right thing to do is. You know that this is the time to swallow your pride and call him. I wouldn't say this if I didn't know that the boy is miserable without you," Verity said softly.

Demelza turned her head to look at her friends, the tears she held back now falling down her cheeks.

"And I'm miserable without him," Demelza admitted.

"Then just do it. You need him Demelza. As great a friend as Dwight and I are, you need Ross."

Verity got up, grabbed Demelza's phone and held it out to her.

"Call him, Dem"

Exchanging glances with Dwight and Verity, she took the phone with a shaky hand, stood and walked down the hall to the bedroom. Closing the door behind her, she dialed and waited for the phone to ring on the other end. She paced around the room and after a minute Ross's voicemail picked up. She was going to hang up, about to chicken out but took a breath and left a message.

"Hey there," she started. Her voice was small, not her usual boisterous self. "Dwight and Verity said I should stop being stubborn and call you so here goes. So um, how are you? Things here are pretty shitty in case you're interested. The whole dad dying thing is not what it's cracked up to be. I don't even know why I'm calling you. You must hate me and I wouldn't blame you. Anyway, I just want you to know that I got your text. And for what it's worth, ditto Poldark."

Demelza ended the call, dropped the phone on the bed and crossed her arms, catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror.

"Well, that's that."

Thanksgiving morning came with bright sunshine and a sense of dread. Demelza fell asleep in Ross's clothes with the phone by her hand. Unfortunately, neither brought her comfort. She tossed and turned, dreams of her life with Ross intermingled with visions of both Lizzie and Ruth laughing at her as they hung on his arms. She woke with a start when her dreams showed her Ross walking away leaving her on the beach alone. Garrick came barreling into the room and jumped on the bed, practically knocking Demelza out.

"Happy Thanksgiving. At least I have you, you mangy mongrel," Demelza said.

She pushed the dog off her and got out of bed. Walking around the bedroom she tried to find clothes to wear and realized that most were still upstairs. Letting Garrick out she ran upstairs to her apartment, found jeans and a button down that were not exactly holiday wear but were practical for what she would be doing today. Grabbing the clothes, she headed back downstairs, pausing briefly at her dad's room. Nothing was disturbed since he went into hospice but she knew that she'd have to handle things soon. Not wanting to linger on that thought, she continued downstairs and went outside to call Garrick. The mutt followed her into the house where she quickly fed him seeing that time was fleeting. She needed to get ready and get to the bar in order to start cooking or no one would be having anything to eat this Thanksgiving except pretzels and bar peanuts.

Reluctantly stripping out of Ross's clothes Demelza headed to the shower hoping that the hot water would shake the melancholy that ran through her. She squeezed body wash onto the scrubby that was hanging on the shower tower and began to lather up. The softness of the soap against her skin was comforting. The events of last night, including the news that Ross was acting like a single man, wore on her both physically and emotionally. She was not prepared for that but shouldn't have been surprised. She knew when she left Cornwall that someone from Ross's past would worm their way back into his life. Stepping under the spray, the water rinsed the suds off as she reached for the shampoo. Pouring a decent amount into her hand she scrubbed her head until it tingled, trying to force the sight of that picture out of her mind along with her memories of Ross.

Today she wanted to focus on her friends, the people they were going to feed and her dad. Shaking and wringing the last of the water out of hair, she turned off the faucets, stepped out of the shower and loosely wrapped her head in a towel. She was bent over, trying to get her mane dry when she heard Garrick barking up a storm. Not having a clue as to what set him off but hoped that he hadn't brought in anything of the critter variety. She slipped on Ross's robe feeling engulfed in his presence and cinched the belt as tight as possible. She opened the door to the bathroom letting the steam out as she called to her wayward pet.

"Garrick! What the hell are you barking at?"

She was walking with a purpose down the hall, pulling the towel off her head at the same time, letting her hair fall down and around her face. Sweeping it up and throwing it back over her shoulder Demelza's eyes looked up to see the one person she didn't expect.

"Ross!"