SNOW-GLOBETROTTERS

DECEMBER 25 TUESDAY

The roads of Bubblegum Valley were paved with bubblegum, the trees carried bubblegum fruit and the people smoked bubblegum pipes. Cannons fired bubblegum and bubblegum machine tanks drove through the city. This was a valley in some kind of war!
"What's happening?" Remus asked, horrified.

A tank stopped. The driver hopped out, removed the bubblegum helmet and began to explain it all:

"It's the Bubblegum War."
"What's the Bubblegum War?"

"In the Snow Globe, bubblegum is money. It is the world currency. All the great bubblegum mines are located here. Therefor war."

"Who are you at war with?"

"Right now it's that dastardly Brawn!"

Having outlived her use, the bubblegum soldier hopped back inside the tank and drove off.

"You were right and I was wrong," said Sirius. "I'm not too proud to admit that. It's not at all rubbish."
"This place is in utter chaos," said Remus.

"You've checked it out. Let's go back and tear down the plum pudding factory! That is my advise, to you. I just give advise like that, like an advisor."

"Suddenly I don't want this place."

"So give it to me, then. I want this."

"I would really rather not knock down that factory. I wouldn't know how to, anyway. It's made up off powerful sugar plum fairy magic apparently."

"It's made up off brick. Can't you just blow it down?"

"No I can't just 'blow it down'!"

"Oh right, that's the one thing you can't blow down."

"Actually, I could, if I could, but I can't, so, whatever."

"It would be a shame to do so anyway, because their plum pudding is great," said James, mouth full. He had been eating on the same pudding since yesterday. "Plum pudding anyone? Plenty to go around!"

"I think I can see Trifle Mountain over there, let's head that way!" said Sirius, pointing.

"I really want to go home now," said Remus.

"Go home? What's the rush?"

"It's Christmas day. My mum is waiting for me."

"So what? My mum is waiting for me. Why don't you do what I did and just send her a cabbage with a hat?"

"Why would I want to send your mum a cabbage with a hat when you've already done it?"

"If I had known you would get so home sick I would have let you do it instead."

"I actually want to go home as well," said James. "Any ideas which way home might be?"

None of them had any clue whatsoever.

There was a crack. The Kitsune Queen, she had found them! She looked very fetching in her white fur coat.

"I have gingerbread men monitoring all the corners of the Snow Globe," she said. "And beyond. Why have you not knocked down the Plum Pudding Factory yet?"

"I changed my mind," said Remus. "Being a king, it's a fulltime job."

"Not really."

"The place is a mess I don't have time for it."

"In The Snow Globe you won't have time for anything else! You will knock down the factory, or Bluebell gets it!"

The Kitsune Queen pulled the long-eared white angora with the fowl temper from her fur hat. She licked her mouth, looking at the rabbit, and almost fell in a trance.

"Mmmmm...looks sooo tasty... I could just eat him up. But I'd hate to mess up my coat."

The Kitsune Queen kept gazing upon the delicions rabbit and licking her lips, not noticing The Brawn wobbling towards her from behind.

"Watch out!" said James.

Miss Nine Tails woke up from her fantasy and looked behind her, but because The Brawn was quite small, she didn't see it.

"Oh. Fool me one time, shame on you."
"Thought I saw a brawn."

The Kitsune Queen eyed him, suspicious. She looked back once more. Indeed, there was a piece of brawn on the ground, as if dropped there by a caterer in a rush.

"I'm more of a raw food gal myself."

Then the Brawn jumped on her throat. She tried to fight it off.

"Quick, the camera!" said Sirius.

Remus gaved it to him. "What do you need a camera for?"

"It's for my Beast Versus Beast photo collection!" He took several photos.

"Noooo!" cried the Kitsune Queen, the last thing she ever cried before she was fully consumed by the Brawn. It let out a healthy burp. But it was hungry for more.

"Eat soggy bottoms!" said James and began to stuff it well with pies.

The Brawn really was insatiable. The boys stuffed it with soggy bottoms, bubblegum and mammoths for a good 20 minutes until finally it exploded.

The Bubblegum Mayor stepped forth, brushing bits of cold cut meat in a terrine off herself.

"You have rid us off the Brawn and the Wicked Kitsune Queen," she said. "Please accept all of The Snow Globe as a token of gratitude."

"Gosh, it's a tempting offer..," said James, longing for his mums Christmas trifle. "So we'll take it!"

"Excellent!"

"Just one question," said Sirius. "Can we come and go as we please?"

"Certainly. Just click your shoes together three times and say 'There's no taste like gum.'"

"Awesome! And how to we get away from here?"

"Do the same thing, except say it backwards!"

"Thanks!"
And so the lads clicked their shoes together three times, said 'Mug ekil etsat on sereht' and next thing they knew, they found themselves on Hogsmead station. It had been snowing a whole lot and trains were experiencing technical difficulties, so it was uncertain they'd get home today at all.

But that was alright, because this year they were having a trifle for pudding! And as if by a Christmas miracle, it wasn't going to contain any jelly!