The Ruler of the Underworld plays. .. candyland?
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"What did you just say?" asked Dean as he stared at Gabe in horror.
"I said my water just broke." said Gabe as he stepped away from the pool of fluid on the floor.
"Why did you break water?" asked Cas in confusion as he stared at Gabe.
"Come on, let's get you somewhere you can lie down." said Lily.
"Bobby!" yelled Dean as he looked around the room for somewhere Gabe could have his kid.
"What is it? Did the girls get off alr. .Oooof." grunted Bobby as he strode into the room and slid in the puddle of fluid on the floor, landing flat on his back.
"What the hell am I sitting in?" asked Bobby as Dean held out a hand and pulled him to his feet.
"That'd be my water." said Gabe as Lily hurridly explained to Cas what that meant.
"You mean. ..OH BALLS!" yelled Bobby as he quickly took off towards the bathroom as fast as possible. Lily patted Cas' back as he stared at his brother, looking a little green after Lily's explanation.
"Bobby, we need. .." called out Dean, but he was cut off by a loud groan from Gabe as he clutched his stomach.
"Use the couch, burn it when you're done." called back Bobby as he slammed the bathroom door.
"Should we call a doctor?" asked Dean.
"Right and how exactly will we explain the eight - legged horse that's about to come out of him?" asked Lily.
"Genetics?" offered Loki as he appeared in the room while Dean was guiding Gabe to the couch.
"Loki, what are you doing here?" asked Gabe from the couch as he lay back.
"I sensed him going into labor, I wasn't about to miss this." said Loki as he walked over to Gabe and stood at the foot of the couch.
"What do we need to do?" asked Cas as he watched his brother adjust the wig on his head.
"What?" asked Gabe with a shrug. 'I wanna look pretty for when Queenie sees me."
"We don't need to do anything, that little nipper is just gonna pop out of there on her own." said Loki.
"Ooooh Father it hurts!" groaned Gabe as he clutched his stomach and leaned forward.
"How's it going in here?" asked Bobby as he walked into the room, buttonning up a clean shirt.
"Oh, lookie there, I can see a hoof." said Loki as he bent down in front of Gabe and peered under the skirt of his dress.
"Hey, no peeking at the merchandise!" squealed Gabe as he turned slightly on the couch so Loki couldn't see.
"Have you been walking around all day commando under that dress?" asked Loki in suprise, ignoring the disgusted look Dean shot him.
"I like having a nice healthy draft blowing around, keeps me fresh." said Gabe as he flapped the skirt of his dress. "Oh damn that hurt." he groaned as he clutched his stomach again.
"What the. .. ok, that's it, I am not coming back in this room until that thing is out of him." said Bobby as a large, bright, orange, gooey blob of fluid shot out from under Gabe's skirt and spattered the front of his shirt.
"Hey, my baby is not a thing." protested Gabe as Bobby made his way back to the bathroom muttering about idjit angels shooting gross fluids and running out of clean clothes.
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"Whoa, head rush." said Abby as she gripped Willow's arm to steady herself as they landed.
"It'll pass after a couple seconds." said WIllow as she looked around at the forest they'd just appeared in.
"What do we do once we find Sam?" asked Abby.
"Well, we . .. " Willow began but she was cut off as a female voice called out to them.
"Yooo hooo, girlies, what are you doing way out here? You'll miss all the fun!" called out the newcomer. Abby and Willow turned to face the direction the voice was coming from and Abby felt Willow stiffen in suprise next to her.
"What's wrong?" asked Abby as Willow stared at the newcomer in undisguised shock.
"That's Artemis." whispered Willow.
"Hold up, goddess Artemis?" whispered Abby in suprise.
"The one and only, is she drunk?" asked Willow as the goddess sauntered over to them, stumbling a little on the smooth ground.
"She doesn't look too sober." said Willow.
"Come on guys, we're gonna miss all the fun." said Artemis as she came to a stop in front of them, holding onto a tree to keep her balance.
"Goddess, what are you doing here?" asked Willow.
"Shhhhh, keep it down, how do you know about that?" asked Artemis, fanning her hands at Willow to shush her.
"Know what? That you're the goddess Artemis?" asked Willow in suprise.
"Shhhhh, as far as the other girls know I'm Arteria, a lost amazon who just found her way back to the domain." said Artemis as she looked around to make sure no one else was listening.
"I'm one of your dryads, what happened to you? The last thing we heard you were going following Orion into the underworld to retrieve his soul." said Willow.
"What about you, are you a dryad too?" asked Artemis as she looked Abby up and down, her intoxicated brain still processing Willow's question.
"Uh, no, hi, my names Abby, I'm uh . . human. " said Abby as she gave the goddess a short wave.
"So how are things going back in the forest?" asked Artemis as she pulled a flask out of her pocket and took a sip from it.
"Terrible, the king is selling us off to minotaurs, bunnies are taking over and the mermaids are basically the ones in charge." said Willow as she folded her arms, a little mad at the goddess for abandoning them.
"What the. .. bunnies!" exclaimed Artemis almost dropping the flask. "I hate bunnies, I specifically told that idiot, no freaking bunnies."
"Well they're running all over your forest, acting like they own it." said Willow. "So what happened with Orion?"
"Grrrr, don't even mention that son of a bitch's name to me. After I went all the way down into the underworld to find him. I had to talk to Charnel, that stuck up ferryman gave me hell to cross the river styx, literally hell. It was horrible, and then he tried to give me flack about being alive and how it's against the rules and crap." said Artemis, pausing to take another sip from her flask. "And then, after I finally pass fluffy, I. ."
"Who's fluffy?" asked Abby.
"Hades' three headed guard dog." said Willow.
"Anyway I get past fluffy and I find Orion and Hades sitting there playing candyland. Can you believe it, I'm fighting my way into the underworld to find him and he's sitting there eating gingersnaps and playing freaking candyland. When I told him it was time to go he asked if he could stay a little while longer, he was just about to pass jungle cinamon forest or the gummibear caves or some such nonsence. I was so pissed I shot him full of arrows and left his dumb ass down there." said Artemis as she patted her bow.
"You shot him?" asked Willow in suprise.
"Yeah, but unfortunately when you're in the underworld, you can't die, something about laws of nature and redundancy." grumbled Artemis as she turned the flask upside down trying to get a few more drops of whatever she had in it, which smelt suspiciously like peppermint shnapps.
"Wow." said Abby as she stared at the drunken goddess.
"So anyway, when I got out, I found myself here and since I'm already dressed like them, what with the bows and the leather and what not, they just assumed I was one of them." said Artemis with a shrug.
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"Why is there orange goop coming out of him?" asked Cas as he watched the pile of orange goop on the floor growing wider next to Gabe as he lay back, clutching his stomach.
"Supernatural amniotic fluid." said Loki as he tried to peek under Gabe's skirt again.
"What did I say about peeking, no one gets to see my downstairs." yelled Gabe as he crossed his legs.
"Dude, you can't be crossing your legs when the baby's trying to come out, you'll confuse the poor little thing, it'll be looking for the light at the end of the tunnel." yelled Loki as he tried to separate Gabe's legs.
"I'll spread em when you close em." said Gabe, pointing first to his legs then to Loki's eyes.
"Oh come on, it's half mine you know." grumbled Loki as he moved away from the end of the couch.
"Dean-o could you clean me off?" asked Gabe as he gestured to his feet. The second he did, a large blob of orange fluid shot out of Gabe and splattered the wall.
"Whoa, I uh, I gotta go check if Bobby's alright." said Dean as he all but ran out of the room.
"Cassie boy, would you.. ." began Gabe.
"I do not think that I . .. " said Cas, backing away from Gabe looking horrified.
"Oh for crying out loud, Gabe, you are an angel, you can just mojo yourself clean and Loki quit trying to peek at the man's unmentionables and Cas. .. well, I don't blame you, carry on." said Damien as he strode into the room, ducking a blob of orange fluid.
"A few days ago, if someone had told me this was going to happen, I'd have asked them what they'd been smoking." laughed Lily as she watched Damien pat Gabe's stomach before telling him to push.
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"Do you see it?" asked Abby as she looked around at the neat circle of huts and the 5 women who were sparring a few yards away.
"There." said WIllow as she pointed. "Artemis said the one with the orange feathers on the door." Artemis had decided to go check on her forest and put everything straight again. She'd told Abby and Willow where Sam was before disappearing.
"So what do we do? Just walk up to it and sneak Sam out?" asked Abby.
"Well, I hadn't really thought that far ahead." said Willow.
"So we basically have no plan." said Abby.
"Since when do we make plans aside from dinner ones?" asked Willow with a grin.
"True." laughed Abby. The two of them stood up straight and made their way over to the hut. Abby pushed the door open and felt Willow grab her arm.
"What is. .. whoa." said Abby as she saw the five women who'd been sparring outside standing behind them each weilding a long wooden spear with sharp tips. A large metal tip waving in front of her face was the last thing she saw before everything when dark.
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"Willow, Abby." called Sam softly as he stood in his cage trying to wake up the girls in the other cage.
"Mmmm, 5 more minutes." mumbled Abby as she rolled over.
"What happened?" asked WIllow as she sat up.
"Are you guys ok?" asked Sam.
"Jolls! Hey, we're here to save you." said Willow as she stood up, rubbing the back of her head.
"Where are the others?" asked Sam.
"There are no others, we're the whole calvary." said Willow as she gently shook Abby to wake her up. "Oh don't look so glum, we'll get you out." she said as she caught Sam's worried frown.
"You should worry about staying alive first." said a tall amazon woman with a cool voice as she walked over to the cage. "My name is Sharima, I am queen of the amazons, why have you intruded on our territory?"
"Your majesty, there has been a mistake, you've kidnapped a friend of ours." said Willow as she pointed at Sam.
"He is special, we have chosen him to replenish our numbers." said the queen.
"You can't use him because. .. um. .. well because he belongs to me." said Willow as she moved closer to the bars so she could look the queen in the eyes. She knew the amazons were ruthless warriors but they followed a strict honor code and would never steal a guy if he was already with someone else.
"Prove it." said the queen as she signalled to one of the guards to open the cage.
"Will, what's going on?" asked Abby as she watched the guard close the cage again. Willow winked at her before walking over to Sam's cage. She took a deep breath hoping Sam would catch on and they could convince the queen that he was hers. She grabbed his shoulders as she pulled him towards her and kissed him through the bars. Sam's eyes went wide in suprise before he closed them and kissed her back, slipping his arms around her waist through the bars.
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Just so you guys know, I'm nowhere near done with the kiss yet, a little more explanation in the next one :)
Thanks to all the wonderful people who reviewed, made me and my muse super happy. I've been running a 102.5 degree fever for the past couple days and if it doesn't go away soon, I'm gonna have to go the hospital and get a needle stuck in me to check if I have dengue fever (there's been an outbreak) anyways, if the next one is a bit late, you can probably guess why lol. My muse is being terribly mean, I don't like needles and she's making big with the teasing.