When we met
Happy New Year!
As you have noticed, this is not a chapter, well it is. Here's the explanation, this chapter happens right after last when she goes home, I was reminded by ReadingManiac that she didn't open the letter Maxon gave her, this chapter is about that.
I have to say that this is an extremely short chapter as it isn't really one, but enjoy.
And before I forget, please tell me any ideas you have for what they could be for the sequel. And don't I published this on wattpad too.
Love y'all
We came home at one-two in the morning, I'm not sure what time it was. I stumbled to my room. On the background I could vaguely hear mom yell something at me but I ignored her. I closed my door behind me and leaned against it. I looked down at my hand to see it was shaking, I sighed as a tear escaped my eyes. I slid down the door until I was sitting on the floor, I pulled my knees to my chest and dropped my forehead on them and sobbed as quietly as I could.
"No, no. NO!" I said into my knees and hit the floor with my fists a couple of times before standing up, that was difficult. I looked around the room and spun to see everything, I wanted to throw something but instead, my eyes landed on a piece of paper sticking out of my bag, I walked over to it and took it out, then I sat on my bed as I opened the letter with shaky hands.
Dear America
I know I promised to act as though we didn't know each other, and it was quite easy, but I know I can't do it forever.
So I wrote this, so that I can lay down my feelings and you know how I feel about you. And maybe it'll be harder to act when I see you again, but maybe it's easier, maybe you recover your memory and I can stop pretending.
I wrote this letter for multiple reasons besides telling you my feelings. I wrote this because I don't think I ever gave you a proper apology for what I did and how I acted. I know you think I didn't care, but that's far from the truth. I never came to visit you because I lacked care, my mind just got stuck in the fact that you didn't remember me, all of the things we did together were being forgotten. But that's also not true, I remember them. And I could tell them all to you if you want, like our first date that I took you to the movies, or our first kiss that happened on the beach, or when I took you for ice-cream and I made you mad and you smashed the ice-cream all over my face, you stopped being mad after you saw my face, and I think the best one would be the first time we made love, the night we conceived the little one, we had gone on a camping trip on a school break.
I could tell you each and every moment we have spent together and I would still feel like I haven't told you enough.
So I'm sorry, I forgot you needed, I was thinking about how I was feeling that I forgot that you were hurting too. I want to apologize a thousand times so I can feel like I somehow have made it up to you, though I know I haven't. I am also sorry for the other thing I did, you know, knocking you up.
This is the last thing I wanted to say, and I wanted to wait until you recovered your memory or I was sure you felt the same way, but I can't keep this in any longer without feeling like I'm going to blurt it out at the worst moment and embarrass myself. Here it is. I love you. Ok? I love you so fucking much, I wanted to tell you while you were in a coma, I wanted to tell you when I saw you, but I couldn't. You don't have to feel the same way and you might not believe me, for we have spent so little time with each other in your eyes, but remember I've known you for far longer. I'll make you believe me and now that you know, I'm going to tell you the same words every damn day, and some day, if you allow me to, I'll make love to you again and I don't care if you think you look like a whale or are too fat, I'll just remind you I love you.
Yours forever
~ Maxon
I was crying when I finished reading the letter. I brought it to my chest and hugged it as hard as I would hug Maxon if he was here. I shake my head to shake thoughts of my dad away from my head and concentrate in thoughts of Maxon instead. I think of his honey blonde hair, silky at touch, on his soft brown eyes that look like chocolate on the dark and hazel under the sunlight, on his perfectly chiseled face, his strong jaw that sometimes has the hint of a stubble but never a beard as I have told him I don't like how it would feel when we kiss, on his perfectly sculpted chest and arms and the V that hints to other things, on how it felt to be naked against him and on the feel of him being inside me.
With a start I realize that the last things I have never seen or experienced, not that I remembered, but I realize that I do remember, I remember each and everything he just said, and that also makes me realize something too.
"I love you too" I whisper into the darkness with tears still streaming down my face, but also, with a smile on my face.