If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. - Abraham Maslow

Everyone and his grandma was at Tony Stark's party, which is to say, there was a lot of people crammed into one room.

At that point, Fury was ready to go back to Maui, get mind-numbingly drunk, and make a fool out of himself in some way that the alcohol would never let him remember. Not even a hangover would be able to match the headache he had, and nothing the nurses on the Helicarrier gave him could help.

When he said he still believed in heroes, he would have liked to recruit heroes who came to meetings on time, were model citizens, or at least didn't come to work drunk. He did not mean oh hey lets shoot all these arrows at the small things on Fury's desk or let me punch you in the throat brother or the ever-popular someone get behind Fury, I'll make a run for the eyepatch.

This is why the coffee had to be decaf.

Getting all of these heroes together, plus a couple of agents, was the easy part of the mission. The hard part was getting them all to shut the fuck up so he could discuss the plan.

First of all, he explained to his captives, uh, heroes, that the party was no longer a surprise for Stella, nor was it an actual party. In fact, it was two assassination missions in one.

At the mention of the failed party, Tony Stark made an unhappy noise at the back of his throat, a noise that Fury ignored with professional-grade practice.

Second of all, Fury devised the main attraction, the role of which was to be played by Clint. Due to Chandra's grossly overactive sexual appetite (which was, surprisingly, a medical abnormality according to at least thirteen psychiatrists and Dr. Phil), conning her into getting a room with Clint would be exceedingly easy.

To discern which room would be most prudent to the cause, blueprints of Stark Tower were of a vital nature. Tony was unexpectedly compliant in handing over the blueprints for that particular floor (but to SHIELD's unending guile, the rest of the tower was still locked up tight) so that a room could be designated for Clint to do the deed. Fury was ninety percent sure that Tony would knock down the walls and rearrange the entire floor after the mention.

Third, he called in Agent Ranger from the field. Someone –coughFurycough- had a most brilliant idea to invite Ranger's target to the party and bring the little lady to New York so that she could be reunited with her mentor.

At this stage in the plan, Stella had to be informed as to the original goings-on devised by Tony and Bruce. She hadn't been very enthusiastic about the party, but neither did she seem very surprised.

Stella and Ranger had the job of luring the target –Mathis- into a room apart from the ballroom. A number of different methods had been devised, but they had all agreed on the most plausible: the threesome.

Civilians always found it hard to believe just how often the threesome tangent worked.

To Fury's vast amusement, the civilians stared in shock with their mouths hanging open. Tony had stars in his eyes, Ranger looked a little bewildered herself, and Bruce was blushing like a bandit. Stella's face was as straight as a board – she'd done this too many times.

Though, secretly, Bruce's blushing was pretty cute.

Lastly, Thor was going as the insurance man. The name spoke for itself – in the event of an accident, he would be there to take care of business. Namely, he was there to insure that, if the need arose for Stella to utilize her abilities, the entire building wouldn't explode. Thor was being awfully nice about the mission, seeing as he really didn't have to participate.

The mission, now that everything had been divulged and planned, was underway.

Tony was doing his duty as host, drinking and flitting about in his gorgeous white suit. A champagne flute rested comfortably in his hand, familiar and cool between his fingers. Clint was doing much the same, drinking and gallivanting and flirting with the partygoers. Together, they made the life of the party, and together they attracted most of the attention.

Tony had Pepper on his arm, and she was monitoring his alcohol intake for the most part. She was having a spectacular time herself, being that she was the one who planned the party.

Ranger was hanging close to the target Mathis, drawing him in with careful whispers in his ear and glasses of champagne. She was acting as the bait while Stella waited in the wings for her signal. Together, they made an intimidating pair – strategy and malicious intent rolled into one package.

Stella had strategically planned Ranger's dress out, making sure that the perfect amount of cleavage was showing and that her hemline left more than enough to the imagination, but little enough to be intriguing. Being the bait, that was Ranger's role; to look perfect, to talk smooth, to be charming. Stella was the spider, and her job was to be a force, a separate entity unto herself, the embodiment of enticing danger. Ranger represented the appearance while Stella was the appeal.

As Stella waited for Ranger's signal that she had successfully coerced Mathis into participating in the so-called threesome, she and Bruce huddled into a corner of their own. There were whispers, short and quiet and heady and hot. Neither of them had a drink in hand, but they didn't need it. Getting Bruce to come to the party had been a mission itself, and Stella was more than happy to keep him calm in the midst of all the people.

The earpiece in Stella's ear (they had forgone the special equipment for this mission) buzzed with Ranger's idle chatter with Mathis and reports of her progress.

Stella scoped the room, her eyes all but jumping in their sockets. She peeked continually over Bruce's shoulder, which was somewhat difficult, but she wished to stay out of sight as much as possible. They sat at a two-seater table, crammed close together seated in wooden chairs.

Bruce spoke quietly, barely loud enough to be discernable over the music, and sipped his water. "I guess I get to see you in action this time."

Stella kissed his cheek. "Unfortunately for both of us."

Normally, Stella wouldn't have been so public with her affections. She didn't mind it so much; she rarely ever got embarrassed. Bruce wasn't so keen on kissing in public, though, and they were in a rambunctious place already. The hype and fervor of the room around them had to be putting an awful amount of stress on him. In effect, and it was by no means on purpose, she was using him as a distraction.

Bruce's hand rested on her knee. "I don't know, it's kind of exciting to watch you do this. I guess it's the conviction. Or the professionalism. Or it may just be the dress – I'm not sure."

"It's just the hormones talking," Stella said, smirking. She took Bruce's glass and took a sip, for once glad that Tony did not discriminate expenses. She really did hate city water.

"Or because you're beautiful."

Bruce leaned in, kissing her full on the mouth. Her lips were soft, and she tasted like tangerine lip gloss. Her tongue darted out to meet his bottom lip, and for the first time that night, he was blissfully unaware of the crowd surrounding him.

His heart slammed against his chest like prison doors, and sparks fired along his nerves. The anxiety he felt in reference to the crowd was amplified by the rush of adrenaline bursting through his veins, but he forced the other guy back with every once of will he could muster. He concentrated on Stella, and her mouth, and the feel of her thigh under his hand.

She broke away from him, caressing his face gently. She winked at him. "Definitely the hormones."

Bruce responding smile was brilliant, and he leaned in to whisper in her ear – the one without the earpiece in it. "So I was thinking, maybe, if we ever get out of this, we could-

Stella jerked back, smacking Bruce in the head as Ranger squawked loudly into her earpiece. She fumed for a moment, apologizing liberally to Bruce, who smiled and shook his head.

"Would you quit flirting and get over here?" Ranger hissed. Stella could hear chatter in the background and a slight panting noise. "This guy is not playing around. I need some assistance. Why did Fury have to make this part of the plan? I don't even like guys!"

Stella huffed and stood up, leaving Bruce in his seat. "Hold him off for a minute. Are you in position?"

"No! I'm on the couch! Hurry up, please! I need you to help me get him there!"

Stella bent to kiss Bruce quickly before running off to hunt down Ranger and the target. She passed Clint on the way, who was talking with Chandra; he had her cornered against the wall, his hand pressing down on the barrier behind her head. Stella could hear the giggling as she passed, and she would have loved to stop for a moment and appreciate how sharp Clint looked in a suit, but Ranger was making too much of a fuss.

Ranger and Mathis were on the couch, and Mathis was crawling all over her as if he had tentacles and she was a meal.

Stella leaned in and wrapped her hand around Mathis's forearm. "I hope you're not trying to start the party without me."

Her tone was sweet and simpering, everything she had seen Chandra do before. She had always based her seductive performances on Chandra because Chandra had always been the one with experience. Stella had been to enough parties with her sister in high school to know that she was a master of the sexual arts, and she'd unfortunately always had to go and get her from some guy's house early in the morning before the parental units figured out Chandra hadn't been home.

So Stella rescued Ranger in such a way as to mimic how Chandra had always done it. Sweet, simpering, and wholly, obviously easy.

This was how Stella got both Ranger and Mathis into bed.

Neither Ranger nor Mathis needed any tugging, not that Ranger would, obviously. She was in on the plot. Mathis was the one who had been solely persuaded. He trailed behind her, drunk and stupid and lustful. He couldn't decide which woman to keep his eyes on, though he was deviating more towards Ranger, who was thoroughly disgusted.

Stella opened the door for them, ushering them in quickly. Ranger went in first, continuing with her role as the bait. Mathis was next, and he was completely mesmerized by Ranger stalking into the room ahead of him. Stella, of course, was last.

She shut the door behind her and made her move.

Mathis grabbed Ranger in a deep kiss, making tiny moans in the back of his throat. Behind him, Stella wound her hands up from his hips, up his back and shoulders and neck, and gently caressed his skin. Ranger threw her arms around his waist to brace him, and Stella slowly dragged her fingers through his hair.

It was over in one swift move.

The resounding crack came too quick for the drunken Mathis to realize what was happening. Ranger caught him so as not to make such a loud thump, not that anyone would probably be able to hear Mathis fall over the loud music. Stella picked up his feet, and together they carried him over to the bed.

Ranger's pursed lips and hard face didn't make such a pretty picture. "So do we just leave him here?"

"Yeah," Stella replied. "Lock the door. One of the operatives will get him later."

"That seems a little anticlimactic," Ranger mumbled, nudging the target's foot with her hand. "I would have thought we'd at least have to smuggle him out of the building."

"No, that's the corpse corps's job," Stella said, wiping her hands on the bed sheets. She had hair gel underneath her fingernails, and she knew it was going to drive her mad before the end of the night. "I hope you never have to do duty for that. I've seen some nasty ones."

Quickly, they exited, one after the other, and Stella carefully locked the door behind them.

Ranger moved off to one half of the room, doing her best to look as inconspicuous as possible. Stella did the same, but instead of heading back to Bruce, she went to find Clint to make sure his job was going smoothly.

It wasn't. Of course.

Clint's drink was slipping out of his hand, getting ever closer to the floor. He was out cold, passed out in one of the leather armchairs situated in the sitting corner. Stella caught his drink before it fell and broke, and brought the cup up to her nose.

It smelled like regular Chardonnay, but in Stella's line of work, drinks rarely ever turned out to be regular. She dipped her little finger in the liquid and tongued it carefully. She waited. She took a sip, confident that her altered genetics would lessen whatever effects the compound in the drink would have.

The taste was must stronger than normal alcohol. She waited a bit longer.

It wasn't poison. However, her eyelids drooped slightly and disorientation set in. She dropped down next to Clint, the glass finally hitting the floor and shattering. In her short stupor, she reached over and felt Clint's pulse to make sure the sedative hadn't stopped his heart. It was sluggish, but it was there. Her worry didn't dissipate completely, but it was assuaged for the most part.

Now, she had something else to worry about. How did Chandra slip a sedative into his drink, and where was she at now?

Stella took a deep, long breath. The fuzzy feeling in her head hadn't calmed down yet, but she couldn't lie around. Being a little dizzy was nothing compared to carrying on through a mission with broken ribs. Holding on to the top of the chair, she left Clint where he was and hoped that anyone who passed would assume that he'd had too much to drink.

The first place she looked was the most obvious: Tony. Chandra liked to hang around with the big dogs at the party, and in terms of wealth, Tony was by far the mastiff in a room of chihuahuas. She was nowhere around him, in fact, Pepper seemed to be doing a magnificent job of keeping Tony happy and guarded.

Thor was next. He was a force in itself, and Stella's sister had always been incredibly talented at acquainting herself with men of his caliber.

Not there either.

In some awful, rotten twist of fate, Stella's gaze passed over the area where Bruce was.

Bruce looked highly uncomfortable. Chandra, however, did not.

Chandra was awfully close to Bruce, and as Stella watched, Chandra would run her hand up his arm every other sentence or so. Bruce would jerk back, but Chandra would move closer, smiling and twisting her hair.

Stella's face flushed darkly, hot and sour and angry. Something snapped, something deep set and jealous and explosive, and that was the end.

Ranger suddenly appeared at her elbow. The woman grabbed her arm and shook it slightly. She yelled over the pounding music, which somehow seemed louder and more offensive than before, "Something's happened to Agent Barton! He's not responding!"

Stella didn't answer.

Ranger took notice of the thick flush of Stella's face and spun her around. She leaned in close, holing both of Stella's arms down by her side. "What's wrong with you? Say something, damn it, don't get all crazy on me now!"

"She thinks she can get away with this," Stella mumbled. Her voice was nearly drowned out by the music. "She's fucked."

"What are you talking about?" Ranger asked.

Stella nodded in the direction of the offending situation.

Ranger scoped the scene, straightening her back queerly. She nodded. "I'm going to get Thor and we'll get Clint out of here. Be careful."

As Ranger walked away, the whole fucking room seemed to explode.

Bruce could feel the drop in temperature as soon as it happened. He had never experienced anything but Stage One of Stella's altered genetics, and he'd hoped he'd never have to. Stella had figured out Chandra's plot, though, and Stella was about to kill her.

This time, Stella was too busy to help stop the Hulk, too.

Bruce fought it, he really did, but the other guy sensed that he was in danger. There was no stopping the spine-wrenching pain or the fiery ache that seared his nerves or the feeling of falling so deep within himself that he knew he would never come back.

He was only vaguely aware of what was happening, and he felt no pain. He was just slightly alert enough to know that the other guy was taking him away from the danger, crashing through a huge glass window and flying through the air. The crunch of concrete and glass and steel popped under his fingers, more in the way of a ghostly sensation rather than physically ripping something apart.

Breaking Stage Two elicited a strange sensation. It was like being shocked over and over, and Stella's brain felt very far away indeed. On the outside, she wasn't entirely aware of her actions, but the inside of her head was aware that she was doing them.

People were screaming and running, some were bowled over by the ever-increasing strength of the wind, and some were trampled and scrabbling for the exit.

Stella knew that she was going overboard, and she also knew that perhaps she was using too much force. She couldn't be deterred however, and with just a little tiny push, Stage Three was broken.

Every pane of glass in the room exploded outwards. Chairs and tables and food slammed against the wall, along with the remaining few people who hadn't yet made it out. Chandra was flung all the way across the ballroom, and she hit the wall bodily with a sickening thud that couldn't be heard over the hurricane gales.

Stella advanced slowly, and by this time, she had very nearly surrendered to her most basic instincts. She knew enough to advance forward, and she knew enough to know that there was no turning back. She had the contract for her own termination by SHIELD; she might as well finish the last job for them.

She picked Chandra up from the floor, undeterred by the hand that appeared on her shoulder when she stood up. Chandra's eyes snapped open, but before she could say a word, Stella twisted her sister's neck until it cracked. She let the body drop to the floor and turned around, face to face with Thor.

He clapped his hands on both of her shoulders and shook her. "You have to calm down, Agent Storm!"

His booming voice sent a rocking tremble down her spine, jarring her into true consciousness.

She blinked and the wind stopped. The rain that had started to pour stopped abruptly, and she was left in the middle of a sopping, rainy, disgusting mess.

"Stark went after Banner," Thor said. He still did not understand the concept of an inside voice.

Ranger appeared again, agitation and maybe a slight bit of concern drew across her face. "Fury contacted me. He said the Council's ordered for your immediate termination, but he's advocating to arrest you instead. They might try to force you to come back to SHIELD."

Stella shook her head. She wouldn't go back to SHIELD, no way, no how.

"Let's find Bruce first, and then we'll talk about my punishment," Stella said, biting her lip.

Stella was worried. It was almost morning, and there was still no sign of Bruce. The two of them –Ranger and Stella- had been driving around for more than three hours, following the trail of destruction the other guy had left in his wake. They drove around in addition to Tony scanning the city from the air. Thor had taken Clint back to the Helicarrier for medical assistance, and to see if he could dissuade as much of Stella's punishment as possible.

They were past the outskirts of New York before they finally made any headway. It was also nearly seven a.m.

It didn't seem as though the Hulk had injured anyone. Caused some property damage, definitely, but apparently no injuries. Now all that was left was to find Bruce and made sure that he had no injuries.

It turned out that Tony was the one who found him. He'd calibrated one of the scanners in his suit to check for gamma radiation signatures, and the major hotspot ended up in the very fringes of a small suburb outside of the city.

He called them and gave them the address. Ranger was driving because of how completely drained Stella was, and she sped off in the direction of the address.

"Why don't you get some sleep? It'll take an hour to get there," Ranger said, yawning widely herself.

Stella wouldn't be able to sleep, no matter how hard she tried. The worry was overwhelming, and though she understood that the other guy would protect Bruce no matter what, there was no force on earth strong enough to stop her from worrying. She remained oddly silent, even though Ranger, upon seeing that there was no way she was going to sleep, tried to make some semblance of conversation.

As the car edged closer to the destination where Tony had located Bruce, the amount of damage increased tenfold. Old junk cars had been ripped to pieces, and even a few sheds had been torn down. The Hulk had created some sort of nest-area in the place where he had stopped, and in place of an enormous green beast, Tony and Bruce sat.

Tony's helmet was off, and Bruce was completely nude. They were just sort of sitting there quietly, not really uncomfortably, just silent.

Ranger drove up, but she stayed in the car. Stella, on the other hand, got out.

She walked over to the pair of men and sat down next to them. They said nothing, just looked around.

Bruce put an arm over her shoulders and hugged her close. He looked exhausted, beaten, as if he'd just waged a war. He was covered in dust and squinting hard because he couldn't see. Stella wished desperately that she had remembered to bring his glasses.

"So, what's next?" Tony asked them. It wasn't a question of whether they would go home or get a bite to eat. It was more along the lines of whether they would stay at Stark Tower or not.

Stella and Bruce exchanged glances.

"Let me put on some pants," Bruce replied. "Then, we'll start cleaning this mess up."

A/N: This, guys, is the next to last chapter. Yes, it's about to come to an end. I've loved writing for this story, and it has really helped me the past few months to deal with a lot of issues. I'm so glad you all have continued to read and stood by me and this story. But I'll save the farewells for next chapter. I just wanted to warn you all. It won't be very sad, and I plan to leave it open-ended in such a way that perhaps an epilogue will follow. No sequels, I'm not into that, but maybe an epilogue. Anyway, get ready!