Chapter 25
The rain was pouring as she ran through the jungle. She had to get to the beach. She wasn't sure why except that she had to. It was a fierce sense of urgency and if she didn't, it might be too late. She had to get there.
She came to the beach and saw the clear ocean. Stars were falling into the water even though it was daylight. It looked like something out of a dream. She wasn't paying attention to that though. Her focus was on the beach and what she saw.
The white sand was painted red. There were two bodies lying very still but they were alive. That much she could see and then she saw him. It was Rorke, smiling and taunting her. He was telling her to come and get him. She obeyed and ran towards him.
She tackled the man and they both fell into a pit. The rain was pouring and she could see the wet earth and the water running off the plants. There was mud on her face and it was smeared like paint. Rorke was standing across from her. His face was painted like hers but he looked more menacing about it.
He pulled a gun out and aimed it at her. She stood there. She wasn't afraid to die. Lakota were not afraid of death. They knew it was a part of life. They greeted it when they went on the warpath or the hunt. She stood there looking defiantly at Rorke, waiting for death.
Rorke though grinned at her and said, "You wanna know why I'm better than you little Charlie?"
He moved the gun and pointed it at a body that was tied up. The head was covered in a head bag. Rorke pulled the trigger and the shot rang out. It hit the body in the abdomen and she heard the grunt. The head bag was removed and she could see Hesh in pain. Logan was tied and forced to watch. He was begging her not to let Rorke hurt Hesh.
She moved to get to Hesh but felt something burn in her side after a bang. She fell and saw a shadow with a smoking barrel. Rorke was grinning as he walked over to where Hesh was tied up. The shadow was still there with the smoking barrel. He said, "Little Charlie let this be your most difficult lesson and one Charlie didn't get. You can't save everyone."
The shadow wasn't moving but she heard words, "Pain is in the mind. Reach past it. Become what…"
"Oh little Charlie," Rorke taunted.
She turned her head and saw Rorke. He had the gun pressed against Hesh's temple. Hesh was looking at her with an apologetic look. He wasn't angry with her but… Then the trigger was pulled and the bang along with screaming…
Sequoia's eye shot open and she sat up in a fluid motion. She was in their room on the carrier. It had been three days since Elias died. It had been a time for healing both in the physical and emotional capacity. She looked at her hands no longer covered with strapping since regular gauze seemed to find a way to be shredded or she simply took it off when they annoyed her which was often. Looking at her hands helped calm her a little so she put them in her lap and just breathed.
A hand touched her back and she could feel the gentle strokes through her t-shirt. It was followed by the sleepy query, "Hawk?"
Sequoia sighed. She hadn't wanted to wake him up. It had been hard since he had nightmares about his father and brother dying and he was unable to stop it. His brother had nightmares of witnessing Elias' death and that he had shot him. She forced herself to push her own feelings aside to help them. She looked at the owner of the hand who was looking at her with a frown even though his expression was sleepy and replied, "I'm okay Shappa. Go back to sleep."
Hesh continued to frown at Sequoia as he looked up at her while he stroked her back like one did a child when they were sick. Any vestiges of sleep were starting to make the idea of sleep a mere afterthought. Something was up and he could tell she was going to be a stubborn ass about it. He slowly sat up to look at her. He figured it was bad when she leaned against him so he wrapped his arm around her and held her close.
Technically they were sleeping together and had been since the night before. That first night they were willing to admit that it was nothing more than falling asleep and being practical. As much as they both enjoyed it, it was Sequoia that was hesitant to go further and not because she didn't like him, but because of her values and sensibilities. It took a bit to pull it out of her and Hesh got the sense that she was nervous about how he would receive that since it was obvious she was familiar with male libido and alluded that she had received wolf whistles before. That set his teeth on edge and it occurred long before he met her. It only proved that he was whipped as Logan would put it and that he really had feelings for her.
They started sleeping together because of Logan. The night his brother had a nightmare and ended up waking Hesh with his thrashing about, it was coincidental and later Hesh put it together that Logan may have overemphasized what he was feeling. True Logan woke up freaked out about replaying Rorke killing their dad and Hesh did his best to calm him down. He didn't think twice when Logan asked for Sequoia; he just went and nearly got a punch in the face when he woke her up and asked her to talk to Logan.
The little pain in the ass had calmed down when he brought her back. Immediately she began murmuring soothingly in Sioux. Hesh had no clue what she was saying and neither did Logan but she soothed him back to sleep. She was going back when Hesh asked her to stay and offered his bunk even though she pointed out that he was the one that needed sleep. She gave him a kiss good night on the cheek and left their room.
Hesh was never able to explain it but that night he was having a rough time. His stitches were pulling and itchy and he was awake to see if Logan needed him. Suddenly she was there like she knew. That time she stayed and soothed him to sleep. She stayed and woke up with him in his bunk with a pensive smile and teasing him that there were worse ways to gain access to her company. He then tentatively asked if she didn't mind staying and he was quick to reassure her that it was just sleeping and nothing else. It was important at least to him that she didn't feel ashamed for it.
It surprised him when she agreed and that was after a period of thought. He saw she was weighing her options as she always did when considering something. It felt like an agreement but it worked out. She actually snuck into their room when it was lights out and crawled in to her place between Hesh and the wall. He would have moved but she was quick and silent even in her sleepwear and he could just imagine what she was like when actually on the hunt in terms of training. She would kick his and Logan's ass together.
Logan was chuckling and Hesh ended up punching the bottom of his bed for that. They both settled down when Sequoia barked for them in a soft but firm tone to settle down. And she said it in Sioux. They were quick to obey though Hesh was certain to hear it in the morning from Logan that he was whipped. He didn't care then when she settled by his side and certainly didn't care now though his concern was over the fact that she was awake and something was bothering her. He started stroking her hair with his other hand and noted how smooth it was even though it looked frazzled. He asked softly, "What is it?"
Sequoia knew that she wasn't going to get out of not answering. Part of her wanted to say something and another didn't and she was scared. She was scared because she loved Hesh and had a strong affection for Logan and Rorke was a looming shadow now. She hadn't had any concerns about it until after Elias died since… She was quiet as she thought about it and leaned against Hesh to draw comfort and some sort of answer. She felt the soothing gesture of Hesh stroking her hair while he waited. Finally she said, "A bad dream."
It sounded like a child's answer but Hesh understood there was more to it. He didn't want to pry because he knew how proud she was but if he could alleviate the tinniest worry, he would jump on it; she would do the same for any of the others in a heartbeat. He asked, "Do you want to talk about it?"
"You need sleep Shappa. Otherwise…"
Hesh knew the implication. He also recognized it as a diversion tactic. "Talk to me. Please, Sequoia."
Sequoia knew that he was concerned. He only used her name when he was attempting affection or a situation like this. Most of the time it was 'Hawk' but with a special warmth in his tone. It was her problem and she didn't want him to worry. What could she say? That it was dream she had previously but now different and playing on her worst fears? She had to think about and the obvious solution was to hunt down Rorke but… like other things she had to look at what her dreams said. It was shrink work but she had been taught that even dreams held knowledge.
It felt bad that she wasn't going to tell the whole truth but she needed time to think. She was quiet as she thought about what to say and allowed herself to be pulled back down on the bed. She rested her head on Hesh's chest and wrapped her arm around his abdomen and breathed a comfortable sigh. Finally she said, "It was about Rorke and… what happened in Vegas. When he taunted me… implied his threats… everything. Mostly what he wanted."
Hesh had been staring up at Logan's bunk listening while stroking her hair. The gesture seemed to calm her and she was already comfortable in what was her favorite position and one he was most comfortable with too. He hated that she was tormented by Rorke and he knew partially why. He had been looking up her father since he was technically on restricted duty to heal up a bit along with Logan. He only knew what was perceived as a legend in terms of small talk between soldiers and the stories that went long in memories. There were some things that he couldn't get past though since there was the clearance issue and it seemed that Charles Williams was good at keeping his family out of military business since Sequoia only knew what she knew.
He wasn't wrong in that she was special and it wasn't because she was good at interrogation. He took time to look her up and apart from her ability to 'hunt' her targets she was skilled at interrogation and withstanding it. The latter had him surprised, but then again he shouldn't have been. The thing with Ramos should have been a clue but it didn't register. If Charles had been the same or more than that when he was active and alive… Hesh didn't doubt he would have taught his daughter. It was no wonder Rorke wanted her.
He hadn't forgotten about what the Fed said about her either. While they wanted Logan, and that was another story altogether, they had specific orders to make sure she wasn't harmed. It had him wonder why and the more perverted reasons came to mind. That was enough to boil his blood.
"Do you ever feel that things happen because the world is trying to tell you something important?"
Hesh was drawn from his thoughts and he looked down to see Sequoia looking at him with her bright brown eyes. She had a tired expression and it looked like she was going to sleep. She was expecting an answer and he thought about it for a moment and replied, "I don't know… maybe. I know it was telling me I am stupid when it comes to talking to you. I get on your bad side to stick my foot in my mouth."
Sequoia felt her lip twitch in a smile as she looked at Hesh. "Not stupid. Just… behind."
"Now I feel stupid," Hesh teased.
"It is endearing," Sequoia offered with a smile and a slight shrug of her shoulders. She leaned forward and gave Hesh a kiss on his cheek. "It's why I like you."
"Now you tell me," Hesh replied with a grin. With his free hand he caressed her cheek gently letting his thumb rub and feel the softness of her skin. He knew that this wasn't completely finished since he did have an answer for her. He added softly, "I honestly don't know except what people leave behind. We only choose what to read into and what not to."
Sequoia looked at Hesh and placed her hand over the one caressing her cheek to hold it there and gave a smile. "I suppose."
"Why do you ask?"
"Just because…" Sequoia shrugged her shoulders and blinked. She could tell that he wasn't convinced. She continued, "Just the things that Rorke and I… discussed." She couldn't tell him that she had felt like she was back in her training in interrogation. She couldn't tell him the things that he wanted her to do and how she felt powerless sitting in there even though she was in survival mode. "Some things are meant to scare and other things are meant to leave you wondering; the best kind since you don't know up from down," she said softly as she glanced off into the darkness as she laid back down and rested her head on Hesh's chest. She frowned as she realized she had repeated something her father once said.
Hesh didn't press since he felt the change in her body. She was drowsy again and he continued to stroke her hair. He did think about what she said and suspected that there was more to what her nightmare was about than she was letting on. He wasn't going to pry though since he didn't want to get into a fight with her. He didn't like that she felt that she had to suffer alone but then again he and Logan were the same way.
He kept up what he was doing until he was sure she was asleep. He felt her wrap her arm around his abdomen and he couldn't help but smile at that. He pressed a kiss to her head and looked up. He heard rustling in the bunk above and frowned slightly. He reached up with his leg and gave a kick right where he knew where Logan would feel it.
The response was Logan swinging his pillow underneath. Hesh was ready for it and grabbed it. It was a wonder Sequoia hadn't woken up from that; she must have been exhausted from the whole thing. Hesh glanced at her and then at Logan who stuck his head down when he couldn't get his pillow back. He locked his gaze onto his brother and signaled they needed to talk.
Now? Logan mouthed the question. He had been woken up when he heard Hesh and Sequoia. It was a murmur and he was going back to sleep when he felt Hesh's kick right on his rear. His brother put the meaning into putting a boot up the ass with his kicks. He used to do it all the time when they were kids and had a bunk bed. It was also how they would let each other know when it was something important that needed to be talked about.
Hesh shook his head in the negative. He then gave the sign that he and Logan developed when they were kids to indicate later. He waited until Logan gave his nod in the affirmative and gave a nod back. He narrowed his eyes when Logan whispered, "You really know how to put a boot up my ass and it's a wonder I'm not a prick."
"Shut up."
"Night big brother." Logan grinned as he flopped back on his bed. He felt Hesh's kick on this legs this time. He knew that Hesh deliberately missed as a warning.
"Pain in my ass."
"Somehow I get the suspicion that you are following me." Sequoia smiled in a teasing manner when she turned to look directly at Keegan even though there was nothing there. "I know you're there, Ohanzee."
"What the fuck does that mean?" Keegan stepped out of the shadows where he had been following Sequoia while she went about doing whatever to keep her busy. She was also on restricted duty and there was nothing for her to do so she gave herself something to do when she saw it.
Sequoia raised her brow at the man. He was obviously frustrated that he had been found out. She gave a grin and replied, "Just something I came up with." She said it in a tone that begged to inquire more.
Keegan sighed and shook his head. "You just want me to ask don't you Hawk?"
"You wanted to know, Ohanzee," Sequoia replied with a shrug. "You just have to ask."
"Now you're being a pain in the ass."
"No I'm not." Sequoia took a few steps closer until she was almost toe to toe with Keegan. She looked him in the eye and asked, "Is there a reason why you are tailing me and have been tailing me since the night after we arrived?"
Keegan knew he was about to be busted but he didn't want to give up just yet. He was more curious how she knew that she was being followed since he had been careful to just follow her around. He was a damn sniper after all. He replied, "What do you mean by that? What makes you think that I am following you?"
Sequoia narrowed her eyes at Keegan. The man was older and a superior but she didn't tolerate being made a fool of. She liked him but she didn't like the bullshit. She said, "I am not stupid Keegan. I am a hunter/warrior by the nature of my people. I was taught those things."
"I was taught something similar."
"Pff," Sequoia retorted with a noise. "It is commendable as a sniper but not like our ways."
Keegan was well aware that he riled her temper. She was looking at him with a narrowed look. He was impressed with her ability to maintain her temper. He realized though that she was like a fuse that didn't give any indication it was lit until it was too late. He pitied the one who got to witness that though he wouldn't mind if it was Rorke but… He knew he was going to have to smolder the fuse before there was something to worry about. He raised his hands in a placating gesture, "Maybe you're right on that account."
Sequoia calmed down when she saw the placating gesture. She looked at Keegan and asked, "Then why are you following me around?"
"Because of what happened to you Hawk," Keegan replied with a blunt answer. "You never spoke of what happened when you were with Rorke and the moment you saw your letter you just seemed to have lost it."
"Can a person be angry when a person they care about leaves them?" Sequoia had asked it like someone asking a question in a class. She had put her hands behind her and clasped them together. She looked at Keegan and added, "There are many ways of expressing grief. I believe there is something about stages of grief and anger being one of them."
"You certainly have a way of showing it," Keegan replied as he shuffled uneasily. It was getting uncomfortable just standing there. "Can we walk and discuss this?"
"Of course."
Keegan led the way and they made it out on the deck. There they could talk without the fear of being overheard. Keegan cleared his throat and said, "I'm sorry Hawk but Merrick and I were concerned… Mostly me."
"I am fine. I am serious Keegan."
"I believe you but… after what you did that night, I was more concerned about you hurting yourself."
Sequoia pursed her lips at that. She wondered if Keegan would understand certain things about her people. Then again how was a person to understand if they didn't learn what it was? If it was an unexplained action then it would be perceived as strange and unusual. She finally said, "You wouldn't have needed to be concerned."
"Why?"
"Because any self-harm would have been in sorrow," she replied quietly. She turned to see the look Keegan was shooting her and explained, "A Sioux practice of mourning, particularly for women, is the infliction of pain." She pressed her fingers together and turned them over so Keegan could see the forming scars on her fingers and hands. "Normally I would think it barbaric but…"
"That was a means of escape Hawk."
"Still the same and you know I was a pain in the ass with the gauze," Sequoia replied with a slight shrug. "I don't go for it but I understand it. And you really don't have anything to worry about Keegan. You and Merrick both."
Keegan looked at her as she lowered her hands. She still rubbed them together, feeling the healing scars. He wasn't completely sure but he did notice that she was thoughtful. He wondered what she was thinking of and she appeared to be somewhat happier. He had noticed how she and the Walker boys interacted.
Sequoia sighed as she looked at the landscape. She could hear the sea as the carrier chopped through the waves. It was almost like hearing the wind through the grasses back on the prairies. She thought that maybe she should go home when this was over and wander the land that she had been born on and lived on most of her life. It would restore much and perhaps it would restore much for Hesh and Logan. It was a thought. She said, "It will be okay."
Keegan blinked and studied her. "You are sure?"
"Nothing in life is certain," she said as she looked at Keegan. "We just do what we can. Make the choices we make and… go with it." She noticed the look he was giving her and frowned, "You don't think I'm nuts do you?"
"No but it seems that you learned quite a bit from…"
"My father taught me a lot about hunting but my mother was the one who more or less directed that," Sequoia replied with a knowing grin. "Just don't tell anyone. I don't want to spoil their image of my father."
"Nah, they'd think it like a couple of stories I heard about you that seem ridiculous," Keegan replied. He sighed in relief to know that his concerns were addressed. He believed her and he knew she would do what she had to do.
"Badass Echo Three," she murmured in agreement and sighed. She grinned, "So you want to know what I called you?"
"As long as it doesn't mean anything I would kick your ass over," Keegan replied with a chuckle.
"Trust me you might like it and consider it an honor Keegan."
"What do you mean?"
"I gave you your Sioux name," she replied. She then explained, "Ohanzee means 'shadow'. And I don't mean by what you've been doing."
"I figured. Just don't call me that when we're on an op."
"Solid copy."
A/N: More moments between Sequoia and Hesh and it looks like the Walker boys may be up to something. Keegan and Sequoia also have a talk. More to come on There Are No Coincidences...
A/N2: All the Sioux names mentioned are approximations.