LAST X-MAS DRABBLE everybody! But please read the bottom A/N!

Saturday 25 December

Merry Christmas Amirrel!

Well, we'll finish off the Christmas-drabbles with something on the very weird side… -lol- I have a feeling, though, that even if the wisher had known from the start this story would be out on Christmas day, the prompt and pairing still would have been the same… ;)

Universe: 2060 (what if?)

Pairing: You won't believe it until you read it…

Warnings: How to put this? Errr… there's nothing dark here… no icky kinks, depending on what you would have those be, but it's not exactly vanilla…

Genre: fun, and smexy but in a weird way.

(Where the Fuck is the) User's Manual?

Okay, lovely readers, this is 2060, but you have to pretend that Robin never heard what he heard and never actually did escape from Slade. Oh, and also assume that anything involving Duncan has not happened yet. Can you do that for me? Great! I knew you could! You are such good sports… let's begin…

"You said I could work on him!"

"I said you could fix him. As a project, because you claimed you were bored... this, however-"

William listened to the arguing couple, Robin stomping down the hallway towards the reception, with Slade following close behind. He couldn't help but think about them as a couple, even though he knew they both would object, at least Robin. The fact was, however, that it had been over a year since the young man had woken up and, very quickly, wrapped Slade around his little finger. This statement Slade would object to. Possibly with a fatal outcome on Will's part. The assistant, therefore, kept his thoughts to himself, and, in cases like this, his head down.

This wasn't a fight, though. Not a real one. No, those were scary. This was merely a battle of wills, Slade trying to put his foot down, only now realizing that Robin had already cleverly removed the floor.

William knew what this was all about. Rob the robot. The teen had finally managed to get his hands on him, having nurtured a fascination with the thing from the beginning. He had tried to convince the man that the only way he was going to learn about the new developments in technology was by hands on experience, and the man had finally given in. They had started working on the robot together, and the place had been pretty harmonious for a while. Then Slade had been forced to go away on a business trip that lasted for three weeks, and since he deemed it too dangerous for Robin to come, he had allowed him to continue to work on Rob by himself. Robin had gone slightly overboard.

Slade had returned home last night, and Robin had apparently only managed to distract him enough to last until now… it was still impressive, William thought, since it was dinner-time now and no-one walking into that apartment should be able to miss the result of the teen's hard work.

"Rob was mainly a household robot, Robin. I agreed we could change his appearance, but not-" the man now started to say in an overly patient voice. William busied himself with some papers when he heard Robin chuckle.

"Well, he can still do chores…"

"William, help me out here." his boss demanded and Will swore quietly under his breath before looking up with a vague smile.

"Well, Sir, I suppose turning the thing into a more human-like android didn't reduce his usefulness?" he said carefully. "I'm sure Robin has learned a lot from it."

"Yeah, I have. I never knew programming could be that interesting." the teen grinned cheekily.

"William, I want you to arrange for a clean-up crew for the apartment, there are parts everywhere." Slade barked at him in retaliation for not taking his side.

"Yes, Sir." the assistant nodded. "Are you on your way to the afternoon meeting down on tenth?"

"Yes. We'll probably have dinner afterwards. Make sure the place is clean until we come back."

"But don't take Rob away!" Robin cut in and looked up at Slade, a mix between a glare and a pleading look on his face. "I haven't even found out if he works yet."

"Leave the thing, then." the man told Will before turning back to Robin. "And if you think that you are going to test run it yourself, it will be back on the scrap heap just as fast as I will have a collar back around your neck."

"Yes, Sir…" Robin muttered. The teen, William had discovered, usually knew when it was best to back down. Usually.

The elevator closed on the pair and Will took a deep breath before entering the apartment to assess the damage. He sighed. There were spare parts everywhere. Metal, circuits, wiring, plans, notes, tools. Slade should have let Robin use a separate work-room, but William knew the man was skittish about letting the teen loose in the building, especially when he was away.

The blond suddenly froze for a second as he spotted the reason for all this mess standing to the side of the room. Last time he had seen the bot had been about a day ago, and he had assumed it was finished then; a metal body and face, and, as he had told Slade, more human than the old Rob, but he hadn't expected this. Yesterday morning Robin had gotten yet another large parcel delivered, and obviously it had contained… skin.

William walked closer, almost cautiously. The robot, or rather android, was amazingly lifelike. It was somewhat taller than him and had the appearance of some muscles, although the body was still slim, like an athletic mannequin. He saw an instruction on the floor, showing how to pull the skin on, like clothes, and then spotted the heat-gun which had welded the seams together perfectly.

"What kind of upgrades did those two give you? Aside from the obvious..." he whispered to himself.

He reached out and touched the skin, jumping back as a pair of black eyes suddenly snapped open.

"Oh, sorry!" Will squeaked before snorting to himself. It was meant to do that, to show that it was ready to be used.

Used, yes… Androids were not very common, because metal robots could do the chores just as well and were sturdier. Slade supported the research, however, because the techniques developed could be used in many other areas, and, William had recently found out, there was a growing market for them… in a very special field. Since Slade had banned the sexual use of children and young teens, people had found other, legal, ways to compensate. But this couldn't be a…? Could it?

He glanced down and blushed. The android was male, of course, and also anatomically correct. If Robin had built a pleasure-droid, there was no wonder that Slade was upset… actually it was a wonder Robin was even walking, as the man tended to spank him whenever displeased.

"Robin must have done a very good job last night and today, to mellow Slade out like that…" William mumbled to himself and grinned a little. He wasn't jealous of any aspect of their relationship, and had seen more than he ever wanted to of the physical part, but he was, he had to admit, curious. He had had his share of girlfriends, but when Robin had alluded that the board member Duncan was interested in him the other week, he had been… intrigued. Perhaps it was just vanity on his part, or a too-long dry spell since his work with Slade did take a lot of his time, but…

William discovered that he had been staring at the thing's groin all this time. After glancing around the empty room he carefully touched the hip. The skin felt real and warm. It was too flawless to be human, and there were only hair on the android's head; dark green locks and perfectly formed black eyebrows with matching lashes.

Many of the androids had strangely colored hair and eyes, William knew. It was partly a fashion statement, partly a security measure; to easily separate them from humans. The color looked good against the pale skin, however, but the eyes were a little scary, the assistant felt.

His fingers slowly traveled closer to where he really wanted to touch. As his fingers fluttered against the skin of the limp member, a soft voice spoke up.

"Activated. Password?"

"Fuck!" William yelled and jumped back again.

"Password accepted. Please choose a program, Sir."

The man shook his head and looked around. He needed to find a way to deactivate Rob before Robin and his boss returned. He did not want to be accused of playing with a sex-doll, especially not a male one.

He saw a handwritten list on the nearby table which looked promising, and picked it up.

"To-" he started to read out loud, but didn't get any further.

"Program two activated. One moment please."

"What? No, wait!" William objected, but should do nothing but stare at the tall robot, as it closed its eyes, and then, after a moment, opened them again and smiled at him.

"Hello there… I'm Rob. What's your name?"

"W-william…" the blond half whispered nervously. The android might look pretty, but Slade had been one of the programmers, and Will was pretty sure Robin had a dark streak too; it might very well be an assassination-tool.

"William… I like that… You look very sexy, William."

Fucking strange for an assassin… Will thought dryly to himself.

"Thanks. Now, turn off."

"Turn off? I have no turn offs regarding you…" the bot smiled after a second or two of processing. "Anything you're up for, I'm willing to do."

"Stop. Deactivate." The assistant desperately tried every word he could think off. "Fuck." he added, presuming the word that activated it might work as an 'off-button' as well.

"Yes, that is my intention." the bot smirked.

"Damn, that smirk looked real…" William muttered.

"I am real… just for you…" Rob said and took a few steps forwards and caught the blond around the waist.

"Listen, Rob, I-mmpff!" William had never expected the machine to actually kiss him. Or to be good at it. Rob didn't taste like a human, there was no personal smells or tastes at all, but his mouth was wet none the less. When he discovered this he was first afraid of a foul taste, like machine oil or something, but whatever was used in these things had no flavor at all.

"You are beautiful, William…" the thing whispered in his ear a moment later.

"Rob, you… please…"

"No need to beg, my love… I'll take care of your every need… feel me… I'm already hard for you."

William stepped back forcefully and stepped back, staring down and discovering that, yes, things looked all the more threatening now. Rob's cock had grown as it hardened and was now glistening, almost dripping with something that seemed to seep out of the very pores of the fake skin, but especially at the tip.

"Lubricant?" William said dumbly.

"For your pleasure, love."

"Wait, are you going to…? No, no, if anything I'll fuck you!" William almost laughed at the ridiculousness of it all. Sure, he might be curious about sex with a male, but only as a top, and he sure as hell wouldn't let a machine deflower him.

Rob seemed to hesitate, and blinked.

"To switch programs, state reset code and program number."

"Err… fuck?" William tried again.

"Code denied. Current program continues." The bot blinked again and then smiled. "Are you as horny as I am?"

The thing sank to its knees in front of him, holding onto his leg with one hand while the other went directly to the zipper of his pants.

Only now did William remember the paper he was clutching in his hand. He hurriedly tried to straighten it out while Rob was working quickly, and had just read the first line again when the android's hand closed around his member.

"Ah!" William exclaimed. He hadn't been touched down there by anyone but himself for a long time, and was quite sensitive.

"You are so beautiful and big." Rob told him adoringly. The bot, William knew, was lying. He had nothing to be ashamed off, but he was averaged-sized. Still… it was kind of nice to be called- the man's thoughts were interrupted as Rob suddenly took his cock into his mouth and started sucking. How the sucking sensation was created, William didn't know, nor did he care. The mouth was hot, soft and wet, and Rob's throat seemed to be able to swallow him whole.

Of course he can, why the hell would anyone build in a gag-reflex in a droid, and even less a sex-droid? he thought disdainfully. He knew that he should be reading the list, but this just felt soooo good right now.

He dared a glance down and met the black eyes. The expression on the android's face managed to look somewhat smug, but maybe that was his imagination. Suddenly William felt the well known sensation of his toes curling slightly, and he closed his yes, letting his head fall backwards, and- Rob withdrew.

"Hey, no, don't stop!" William whined. He had been too close for it to be pleasant at the moment.

"You want to come while I fuck you." Rob said almost as he was lecturing the human. He then blinked in the way William had now recognized as a move the droid did when it was processing something. Rob was still under construction, William suddenly remembered, and paled. What if the machine had bitten his dick off? Rob was now done with whatever he had done, and had apparently decided on anther path of conversation.

"I'd like to feel your tight ass around my cock. You are so hot. I want you. I will fuck you."

"You need some work on your dialogue skills." William muttered and tried to pull away again. This was apparently not part of the 'program', and Rob wouldn't accept it. Instead Will found his arm caught and he was, gently but firmly, ushered towards the coach. Before he knew it, he had been bent over the arm-rest, and real panic started to set in.

"Oral and digit preparation process engaged." Rob uttered seductively.

"You really need dialogue-work." Will said and desperately looked at the list again. He read it over and cursed. It wasn't helpful, it was just lines of computer-code.

"No! De-activate! Abort! Stop!" he tried again. "Freeze!" he added for good measure. The droid had, now with a grip around his ankle, kneeled behind him, and- "Oh fucking hell!" It had stuck its tongue up his ass. It didn't feel painful, in fact if felt… rather nice, but this was a lot farther than his heterosexuality, however unsteady, was willing to go. Trying to kick the droid away only increased the firm grip, and trying to crawl over the couch, away from the crazy thing, was just as useless. As he collapsed, half defeated, something fell out of his breast pocket. His cell-phone. His beloved, wonderful cell phone! He picked it up and didn't even hesitate before using it.

"We're in a meeting."

"Robin! Don't hang up! For the love of uuuhhh…." Rob had just stuck a finger up his ass.

"Will? What's going on?" the teen sounded half irritated, half concerned.

"I… just… happened… NNNNGH!" the damn finger vibrated.

"Will?"

"Rob… how… oh, hell…" His mechanical lover had added another finger. William felt stretched and full, but at least there was no pain, and as the finger inside him curled… "AAAH! Robin! How… how do you turn him off?"

"What? Who?"

"ROB!"

"You… turned Rob on? No pun intended." the teen on the other side of the line snickered.

"Y… yes… yes… yes…"

"I got you the first time."

"Mmm…"

"What program?"

"T-two. Ooohh…" A third finger was added and the digits twisted inside him, vibrating at varying speeds while, it seemed, leaking that lubricant.

"Oh, that's a good one for a beginner, though maybe a little fast. Glad you didn't pick six." Robin sounded amused, and William cursed him under his breath.

"Didn't… pick… Accident…" he growled, as, suddenly the fingers slipped out. "Good, he sto-" William exhaled explosively as the head of the robot's cock pressed into him, also vibrating. "Tell me the word! Now!"

"You sure? Sounds like you're having fun…" the teen chuckled.

"Now!"

"All right… it's 'rubber duck'… I have to go back to the meeting. Tell me everything later, okay? I want to know how the vibrations felt…" Robin hanged up on him at that moment, but William had barely heard him as he had dropped the phone when Rob had started thrusting into him, slowly at first and then faster and harder.

Rubber duck. He knew he should say it, but it just was so damn hard to coordinate that thought with the actual act of speaking. The fact that it felt so good might also have something to do with it.

"Who was it?" Slade asked as Robin returned to the table. The meeting was in a short recess and the others had left the room to get coffee and snacks.

"Will." the teen said and sat down, checking over his notes.

"Did he have any trouble with the clean-up?" The man had arched an eyebrow, slightly suspicious as his assistant had called his 'trainee' instead of him.

"Hmm? No, not at all." Robin looked at the graphs with unusual interest. "Say, Slade? Let's really celebrate you being back with a long dinner tonight? Maybe a movie if something is showing?"

The man smirked. He had a certain suspicion about what had happened.

"Of course." He nodded benevolently. If his assistant was… busy, he'd rather stay away long enough to let him sort things out… and now he might not hear that soft snort from the man whenever he himself was busy with Robin anymore. "I've been thinking about the Rob-situation… do you think that William might an extra hand?"

Robin grinned at him.

"You know what? I think he does. Let's ask him tomorrow. Oh, and remind me to give him an owner's manual."

"You wrote one?"

"Err… no. Remind me to do that too."

"And maybe," Slade grinned, "we should add some administrating and house-keeping skills to his programming as well."

"Oh, that kind of extra hand…" Robin chuckled. "Well, okay, I guess we can have Rob do well at a desk as well as on it and under it."

"You are not upset at your toy being taken away?" the man asked dryly.

"Rob? Nah, I never wanted him for myself…" Robin glanced over at the man and leered. "He's much too small for me."

The End.

A/N: The wished pairing was, (obviously) Rob/William, and the prompt sentence was: "What kind of upgrades did those two give you? Aside from the obvious..."

Some of you don't like sex-toys (for some strange reason) –cough-yaoigurl12-among-others-cough- and this might have been the ultimate horror-story for them… ;)

I hoped some liked it, and I'd like to wish you all a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!

The Christmas-drabbles are now over, I hope you found something to love among them, and I hope you liked most of them. I'm not upset if you hated a few, some themes were stranger than others, but I actually found myself loving the strangest the best… at least they were interesting to write!

In the mean time, thank you for all the reviews! I'm sorry I haven't been able to answer them all, but, you know… posting every day… I hope this kind of Christmas-present was fun for you. I can't promise that I'll do this next year, but we'll see…

Now, then, we DO need a New-Year-fic, don't we? I've been thinking of contests and other things, but no… what I'll do is a sequel… but you kinda-sorta get to choose of what! Here's the deal; many of the Christmas-drabbles made you wish for me to write more in that universe, so, if that's the case, pick one FREE-STANDING drabble, you want to see continued. If you want to you can tell me why, and even what you would like to see happen in it (although I'm not promising to follow that idea)… I'm not sure what will make me pick the "winning" drabble, but it will probably be the one that has the most votes in about two days or so (I'm giving you some time, since it's Christmas). Below is a list of the freestanding drabbles up for votes… NOTE: "Alien Matchmaker" is NOT available for votes. Why? Because I've already promised kitsunechibiko a sequel as a b-day drabble, so check out "delightful drabbles" on the 16th!

See you soon again, hopefully… ;)

Love

/W

List of free-standing drabbles:

01 Needs and Necessities

06 Growing Closer

07 All I Want for Christmas….

10 Closeted Desires

14 Amusement Park Amusements

15 Dream a Little Dream of Me

16 Cop Killer

18 Two of a Kind

19 I Do

21 Deserving This

22 The Journey

23 Learning Curve

24 Time