A/N: Someone brought it up recently, so fyi, in the HTTYD books Hiccup's birthday is February 29th. I know it's anachronistic, but so are many things about the HTTYD universe, both in the movies and the books. I've continued to use the modern Gregorian calender just for simplicity's sake.

Smut ahead.

Chapter 25: Enough

She followed the clang of metal on metal to the forge, where she found Hiccup standing over the anvil, hammer in hand and pounding away at a thin piece of steel. Toothless was curled around his legs, and he looked up when she entered the room, large green eyes wide and worried. He rumbled softly and stood, ears flat against his skull, and padded over to her. They shared a long look, then Toothless nodded at Hiccup before his nose was at her back and nudging her at his rider.

Your turn, those big green eyes seemed to say, before he slipped quietly into the dark tunnel.

If Hiccup noticed his exit, or her entrance, he didn't acknowledge it.

The sound of clashing metal rang sharp in her ears, and she watched sparks erupt from Hiccup's hammer with every blow.

"Hey," she said. Hiccup didn't answer. "You okay?" she tried again.

The sound grew louder. She wasn't even certain if he was actually trying to shape the metal, or just taking out his frustrations on it.

"Every time," Hiccup growled. "Every damn time, it's the same stupid fight. Every. Single. Fucking. Time." His words fell in time with the fall of his hammer. "She could change everything, and she just won't!" The thin piece of metal cracked, and Hiccup tossed his hammer to the side with angry shout. He pulled off his work gloves and stepped away from the anvil to slouch against his worktable with his head in his hands, his back still to her. "What I wouldn't give right now for a drink," he mumbled.

Astrid approached him carefully and placed her hand on his shoulder. Hiccup raised his head and she could see what might have been tears in the corners of his eyes. "Hiccup," she began, but he interrupted her.

"She's right, though."

Astrid blinked. "What?"

Hiccup turned empty eyes towards her. "She's right. I haven't done much more to change their minds than she ever did. I left and let them all think I'm dead, let Dad think I'm dead." He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. "And even if we defeat the Queen, we still have the Vikings to convince, and that won't be easy, even if the raids have stopped. She's right, we're stuck."

Astrid frowned. "Not about everything," she said, even as she acknowledged the truth of Valka's statements, the truth she and Hiccup had both been wrestling with for weeks; that he had been wrestling with for years: their current solutions were not sustainable, and anything more permanent was nearly impossible.

He groaned. "And I could do it; we would stand a chance if only she would just help me." Astrid stepped closer and let her hand wander up and down his back in a soothing motion. "But of course she won't." Hiccup laughed bitterly. "I don't know why I ever thought she would. Dragons have always meant more to her than people. They meant more to her than me." He took a shaky breath and Astrid rested her head on his shoulder.

"Maybe it wasn't that simple. Maybe she thought she was doing the best thing for everyone," she said quietly, more for the sake of Hiccup's comfort than her own convictions.

Hiccup snorted. "Sure she did." He was quiet for a few moments more before, "After everything that happened with Dad, I was so excited when I found her, and saw everything she was doing with dragons. And she was so proud of me. Her dragon-riding, dragon-loving son…" His voice shook, and Astrid pulled away to see a lost, broken look on his face. His eyes were wild and brimming with tears and his lip was quivering. "But I wasn't enough," he murmured, his voice flickering in and out of a whisper. "I was never enough, not for either one of them, not for anyone-"

"You are enough," Astrid pressed, hands wrapping around his upper arms and shaking him gently. "Maybe they don't see it, but you are enough. You're enough for me, for Toothless, for everyone who matters. It doesn't matter if you're not exactly what they wanted you to be, you've chosen your own path. You've picked dragons and Vikings and there's nothing wrong with that. And if there is any hope for change in this whole mess, it'll be from someone like you, who refuses to choose sides; who refuses to agree that there has to be sides."

Hiccup's eyes rose to meet hers, and he simply looked at her for a long minute, before his hands cupped her cheeks and he pulled her into a hard kiss.

The edge of the wood dug into her back as Hiccup pinned her against the worktable, his mouth moving desperately over hers. His hands traveled down to her waist and crushed her against him while his lips left quick, feverish kisses down her neck before returning to her mouth and swallowing her questions. His hips pressed close to hers, his thigh slotting between her legs, and he started a slow grinding motion, making her whimper. He moaned into her mouth, the growing heat of his groin rubbing against the crease of her hip. His hand slid down her thigh to pull up her skirt, and Astrid pulled away from his kiss.

"Hiccup, what are you—"

"I need you," he panted against her cheek, and when she drew back enough to really look at him, her heart broke at the fragility in his eyes.

She nodded. "Okay," she said breathlessly, before his mouth was on hers again.

Even after their extended session last night her body thrummed under his hands and she shivered as he kissed the sensitive skin behind her ear. He spun her suddenly, bending her over the table and pushing her legs apart as he rucked up her skirt. One of his arms stayed locked around her waist as the other pulled down her leggings and fought one-handed with the ties of his pants. His breath was hot against her ear and his fingers cool between her legs as he stroked her. Astrid's eyes fluttered shut and her heart pounded with anticipation. She was so easily worked up lately. He hardly had to touch her; the thought of it was enough to leave her wet and wanting. She could feel him against her thigh, already hard and so very hot.

Hiccup kissed her temple tenderly, and then slammed into her without warning.

Astrid gasped, her head dropping to press against the table, while Hiccup breathed a shuddering sigh into her hair. He'd hardly given her a minute to adjust before he was moving, quick, hard strokes that left them both panting and whimpering. His lips dropped messy kisses on her neck, and his hand between her legs held her hips tight against him even as he rubbed circles against that sensitive bud.

"I love you," he rasped in her ear, as he so often did when they made love, but especially on his worse days, when the way he took her was rough and edging on selfish. She tried to reply, but the angle had him hitting her deep and rubbing that spot with every sure stroke, and her words were lost to a wanton moan.

The heat of the forge was already sweltering, and it wasn't long before their clothes were sweat-drenched and clinging to their skin. The table edge bit into her hipbones, and the muscles of her legs ached from the strain of holding herself up on her toes for so long, but he felt so good and she felt so full she didn't care.

She doubted she'd ever admit it to him, too many connotations of dominance, but she liked when he took her from behind. She liked the feeling of his hips grinding against her ass; liked how his hands always ended up giving her breasts and her pearl the attention they needed; liked the angle and how she often came more quickly.

Hiccup had started mumbling into her neck, as he was wont to do. Sometimes it was praise and promises and adoration; sometimes it was filth: things he'd like to do to her, what she felt like around him; most often it was a nonsensical litany of broken sentences and half-thought phrases interspersed with her name and murmured into her skin like a prayer.

"Beautiful…gods, Astrid…you're so—fuck—need you, I always need you, I can't—nothing, not without you...Astrid, ah, need you, don't, oh gods, don't leave me. Please don't leave me. I want ah, enough…I want to be enough for you…"

Her hand found his on her breast and intertwined her fingers with his. "I love you," she gasped, and titled her head back enough to kiss his cheek. "I love you, I'm not going anywhere."

Valka was right, Hiccup wasn't always easy to handle; she had seen that side of him already. Valka was right about many things; she was right about almost as many things as she was wrong about. They could not spend the rest of their lives acting as mediators between the Vikings and dragons; the situation could not stay as it was, but on their own, what could they do?

Things used to be simple. Things used to make sense. Astrid had known her place and her side and her mission. Things like loyalty and enemies and honor and what she was supposed to do. Those same things didn't make as much sense anymore.

But this did.

This made sense. Hiccup made sense. Being in his arms, feeling his breath on her neck and his hands on her skin. The way they fit together; the heat and friction melding them together like metal in the forge fire. Hiccup pressed her lower against the table and picked up his pace. Astrid whimpered and her hand found his between her legs, egging him on. She was so close, he was touching her everywhere she needed, everything was tightening, she rocked her hips back against his, chasing the sensation. A particularly hard thrust and she was arching her back and gasping into the tabletop as she seized around him.

Her eyes fluttered open, her breaths coming hard and Hiccup thrusting toward his own end behind her, and suddenly she realized why she'd wanted him so much lately. Hiccup's rhythm turned erratic, and Astrid's eyes widened. "Hiccup, wait—"

Too late. He came with a grunt, still inside her, and Astrid closed her eyes and let her head thud against the table.

"I shouldn't have let you do that," she said once she thought he might be coherent again.

Hiccup pulled away, still panting, and rifled through a drawer to find a clean rag to clean themselves up with. "Normally you want me to."

Astrid straightened and snatched the rag out of his hands. "And you normally remind me that it's safer if you don't." She could feel Hiccup's perplexed stare as she cleaned herself. "I'm so stupid. We shouldn't have been doing this at all lately."

"Uh, explain?"

Astrid huffed, her cheeks growing warm, though she suspected they were likely still pink from exertion as well. "I'm fertile. That's why I've been so damn horny lately."

"Oh." Astrid rolled her eyes and tossed the rag aside and pulled up her leggings.

"I'm usually better at keeping track of these things, but I didn't even think about it until today." She slumped against Hiccup's shoulder and he wrapped an arm around her.

"How worried should we be? I mean, you've still been drinking that tea, right?" Hiccup said, nuzzling his face into her hair and kissing her ear.

Astrid shrugged, fighting a smile at Hiccup's affection. "Well, between last night and today? I don't know. It's not like the tea is a guarantee, but we've cut it close before without anything happening. I guess we just wait and see if I start bleeding in a couple weeks or not." Hiccup hummed into her hair, lips still lazily trailing her skin. Astrid giggled despite herself. "You sound so concerned that I've just told you that there's a chance I might get knocked up."

"We don't know that yet," Hiccup told her, kissing his way around to her cheek. "And we'll figure something out if you do."

Astrid rolled her eyes. "I forgot how mellow you get after sex." She smiled and let Hiccup kiss her, happy to see him looking so relaxed after such a stressful morning. "You feeling better, at least?"

Hiccup nodded and kissed her again, a sweet brush of his lips across hers that was so different from his earlier urgency. "You always know how to make me feel better," he mumbled. "It's hard to worry about anything." He pulled her into a tight embrace and kissed her deeply but softly. When they broke the kiss Astrid settled her chin on his shoulder and carded her fingers through his hair.

"What would we do," she asked," if I did get pregnant? I know I might not be, and I'm probably worrying over nothing, but it's not like it couldn't happen."

Hiccup sighed through his nose, the cool air pleasant against the sweat-damp skin of her neck.

"We'd figure something out. I know people who could help us. Hilde, the woman who owns that tavern, she could help. She'd give us a place to stay when you were close to being due, so we'd have people around to help when you gave birth. And Laleh, she's a…friend of mine, she's a mother, she'd help. And there's always that herb you mentioned, the one for when Moon Tea fails…" Hiccup trailed off, and Astrid's arms tightened around his shoulders subconsciously.

There was always that option, she supposed. Pennyroyal supposedly wasn't pleasant but it was effective. That would be the simplest solution. They weren't exactly in the best position to be parents, after all.

Even so, the thought of a child of hers and Hiccup's, a baby who was part of her and part of him…it seemed such a precious thing she wasn't sure she could ever bring herself to be rid of it…but would Hiccup feel the same?

Astrid pulled back and gave Hiccup a tight smile. "It doesn't matter right now anyway. We've done enough worrying for one day. Tell me about what you're making…"

Xx

"I can't promise to solve your dragon problem, but I can at least promise to improve your chances."

Stoick stroked his beard pensively and frowned at the dark-haired young man across the table. "And what makes you so sure you can help? We need dragon killers more than dragon trappers, eh, Erik, was it?"

The young man gave him a cocky smile. "Eret, actually, sir."

"Don't listen to him, Eret son of Eret, we totally need dragon trappers too." Ruffnut fluttered her eyelashes and gave Eret a suggestive flick of her brows. Beside her, Snotlout scowled and elbowed her gently.

"Ruff, babe!"

Ruffnut rolled her eyes and shifted the infant sleeping in her arms. "What? I'm just kidding around! I can look at the menu, I just can't order anymore."

Snotlout opened his mouth to reply but Stoick cleared his throat loudly and the bickering couple quieted. He nodded to Eret. "Well?"

"The thing is," Eret began, "Dragon trapping is much the same as dragon killing, you just don't get to the actual killing part, which just saves a step, the way I see it. We've got traps and specialized equipment for bringing dragons down. We can help upgrade your defenses and rid you of a few dragons—for a fee, of course."

Stoick hummed. "And this equipment you have, like those nets you showed me on your ship, could they bring down any dragon?"

Eret nodded. "Near enough any dragon, yeah. We coat them in special oils to keep them fireproof, but they're tricky against things like Timberjacks."

"Could you use them to shoot down a Night Fury?"

Eret looked taken aback. "A Night Fury? I don't know that there's anything that could take down a Night Fury. I don't know why you would even want to try." He frowned. "Unless…" His eyebrows shot up. "You want to take down that Dragon Master fellow I've heard about."

Stoick nodded. "If we could, yes. But these nets of yours, if they couldn't take down a Night Fury, do you think they could bring down a dragon with a rider on its back? Without harming the rider?"

Eret looked perplexed. "Well, I couldn't say, really, it's not like we've ever had to try. I suppose it would depend on how low to the ground they were when we shot them down. And if you're aiming for the Dragon Master, it doesn't make much difference either way, because I still don't think it's possible to shoot that dragon of his out of the sky, with or without him on it."

Stoick shook his head. "It's not him we want you to shoot down." He paused, his eyes sweeping over the faces of the few gathered in the room. "There's a girl who flies at the Dragon Master's side."

Eret blinked at him. "A girl? He's got an ally?" Those gathered in the room nodded, most with eyes downturned. It was difficult for all of them to admit their former friend's allegiance. Eret sat back in his chair. "Blimey. How did that happen?"

Stoick cast another glance around the room, finally landing on Gobber, who nodded, eyes narrowed. He sighed. "We tried to win the Dragon Master's favor by gifting him a young woman. Not only did it not work, but she now fights at his side."

Eret's eyes went wide. He looked around the room at the guilty faces all staring at the table tops. Ruffnut's baby started fussing and she held the child closer. "You did what?" No one answered. "Gods above," he breathed. "I'd heard things were desperate in some parts of the Barbaric Archipelago but I hadn't heard things had gotten that bad. I mean, you miss a lot of gossip when you're on the sea for awhile, but I'd have thought I'd have heard about this. When did this happen?"

"Last November," Gobber said quietly.

Eret shook his head, frowning. "Last November? Now I'm really wondering why I didn't hear about this. I'd have thought Astrid at least would have told me when I saw her."

All eyes in the room turned to Eret. "What?" A tall man with a blond beard and striking blue eyes leaned forwards, gaping at Eret. "You—what do you mean—you've spoken to Astrid?"

"Um, yes?" Eret scratched at his chin. "Back towards the end of last year, around your winter holiday. I met her by chance in a tavern in…Ing's Ear, I think."

The blond man was on his feet and had his hands on Eret's shoulders before he realized what was happening. The man's blue eyes were wide and manic as he stared down at the younger man. "You saw her around Snoggletog? At Ing's Ear? What was she doing there? What did she say? How was she?"

"Arvid, calm yourself," Stoick said evenly, and Arvid threw a glare over his shoulder.

"Around Snoggletog, Stoick, do you realize what this means?"

Stoick frowned. "Not yet, but perhaps if you let this young man continue his story we can find out." Arvid's large hands lifted from Eret's shoulders and he reluctantly took his seat. Eret scratched at the brand on his chest nervously. And here he thought this career choice might be the safer one. Stoick turned his attention to Eret. "Tell us, Eretson, when you saw Astrid, what was she doing in Ing's Ear?"

Eret shrugged. "We didn't talk for long, and it's been a while now, I don't remember very well, but I remember she said she had left Berk. Something had happened here and she decided to leave." He watched those seated at the table exchange guilty glances again. "She was trying to find passage on a ship to take her somewhere else. She wanted to go somewhere new, get a fresh start. I offered to let her come with me, but she turned that down. Said she was trying to get away from fighting dragons."

Stoick's bushy red eyebrows drew together. "Did she say how she got to Ing's Ear to begin with? Was she there with someone?"

"Em…" Eret frowned at those assembled in the corner of Berk's Great Hall. "She was there with a friend of hers, some young man."

Everyone was exchanging looks Eret didn't understand again.

"A young man?" Stoick asked, blue-green eyes hard and burning in the low firelight. "What sort of young man?"

"What sort of friend?" Arvid interjected, his curled lip making his true meaning clear.

Eret cleared his throat, feeling awkward and wondering what exactly he had walked into the middle of. "I don't know, really. It seemed kind of complicated. She said she thought there had been something romantic between them, but she'd tried to push him away or something, and he'd gone to the inn upstairs with some other girl, and she was furious about it. In the end she decided that she didn't want to share and went up there after him. Last I saw her, they were leaving together, her and this idiot bloke of hers."

"So you saw him?" Stoick demanded, almost as soon as the words were out of Eret's mouth. "This man she was with, you actually saw him?"

Eret shifted in his chair. "Well, I mean just for a second."

"What did he look like?"

"I—I dunno, I mean, it's been months since that happened, and I only got a brief glimpse of him, and from across a crowded room—"

"You've got to remember something, anything."

"He was, I don't know, he was tall, thin? Brownish hair, I think? Look, why does this all matter so much?"

Stoick ignored him. The large man was looking at Gobber. "Tall and thin with brown hair, same as your friend said in his letter. That's got to be him."

"That's got to be who? Why is this so important? Look, what happened to drive Astrid away, and why does it matter so much that I saw her with some random bloke in a town far away from here?"

Again, no one answered; their eyes were all fixed on the table. Finally Stoick sighed and said, "We have reason to believe that young man you saw…is the Dragon Master himself."

Eret's mouth fell open. His heart dropped into his stomach. But, if that man was the Dragon Master, then Astrid-

"It was her," he said, voice quiet and small in the large room. "The girl you gave to the Dragon Master to appease him, it was Astrid."

No one contradicted him. Eret ran a hand through his hair and exhaled a shaky sigh. "I can't believe it. And now she's…she's fighting with him? I can't—"

"She's been wreaking havoc on the villages," Stoick continued, nonplussed. "We need your assistance to bring her, and if possible, her draconic husband, to justice. Preferably without harming her until we know for certain that her guilt is absolute."

Eret blinked at the table top. "I…I suppose I'll see what I can do to help."

The rest of the meeting was spent discussing the logistics and strategy of battle and what improvements Eret and his men could bring to their defenses, but Gobber found he could not pay attention to any of it. The wheels of his mind were turning, cogs slotting together and thoughts falling into place. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't notice the meeting had ended until he felt Stoick's hand on his shoulder.

"You alright, Gobber?" Gobber gave his friend a long look before nodding and taking a swig from the mug he'd been ignoring.

"Just fine, Stoick. Just…thinkin'." Stoick nodded and left to inspect Eret's traps. Gobber sighed and started the journey back to the forge.

It was a quiet day, not much work to be done and no customers waiting for him at the window. Gobber poked absently at the forge to get it burning, but his mind was still faraway. He stared at the curtain sectioning off the back of the shop. Without really thinking about what he was doing, he pushed the curtain aside and stepped into the tiny workspace and looked around at dusty blueprints for inventions his young apprentice had never realized. All of those dreams, all of those mad ideas, left here to gather dust.

For nearly five years he had wondered, had let it niggle at the back of his mind…

They never had found a body.