Chapter Twenty Five

Jasper

I watched Bella go and knew she was upset by something, she was feeling jealous! I didn't understand, there was nothing to be jealous of, Rose and Emmett were mates and I would never make a move on her, besides I was in love with Bella. I called and went to follow her but Charlotte shook her head,

"Give her time. She'll realize there's nothing to be jealous about, she's just feeling insecure. I don't think she has any experience being around couples, or at least not couples like us."

I laughed at that

"Very few people have. We are kind of unique"

A few times I shot a look at the door expecting her to come back in smiling, comfortable in her knowledge I loved, her but she didn't. I felt the hurt but I wasn't sure what to do about it, I could apologise but I hadn't done anything, I could ask Rose or Char to talk to her but that seemed stupid. Maybe she was just tired, I'd give it a while then go in to say goodnight properly. In the meantime we sat chatting about old times, post Maria but before I met up with Alice. Emmett was interested in my wanderings and I told him a story of when I met up with another nomad Amber. She had been travelling alone for a while and we teamed up although she was nervous, she, like everyone else in our world, had heard of me. We were only together a few weeks before I couldn't stand her constant watching. She was drawn to me and we had sex a few times but it meant nothing to either of us, just a release of tension. When I next checked the time it was almost morning so Emmett and I went out quickly to hunt leaving the girls and Peter to pack up and let Bella know we would be leaving late afternoon. I'd wanted to get away earlier but hunting was difficult here and I knew Em and I would have to travel a way before we found anything worth catching.

Bella

When I got up I felt like crap, I hadn't slept properly expecting Jasper to make an entrance, to kiss me goodnight, but all I heard were voices and quiet laughter and I lay seething with jealousy. If love meant so little in this world I wasn't sure I wanted to get involved. Deciding to try to act normally I got up and showered before going through to make breakfast. From the hall I heard Peter and Char talking,

"Did he ever mention Amber to you before?"

"No, sly dog. He plays things close to his chest our Major. I wonder if he knows where she is now?"

Amber? Who was she and why would he want to know where she was now? I put a smile on my face and walked in with a cheery "Morning"

Rose looked over and I thought I detected guilt on her face.

"Hi Bella. Sleep well?"

"Not bad thanks Rose. Where are the others?"

"Jazz and Em went to hunt. He said to tell you we're moving out mid afternoon if you can be ready"

"That's if they don't run into Amber"

Rose hissed at Peter who grinned,

"What? I was just saying"

I got some cereal and a bowl and opened the fridge with shaking hands. Rose and Char went out of the room leaving me with Peter and sitting at the table I started to eat.

"That smells disgusting Bella."

"It tastes OK"

"Oh I'll take your word for it. You OK? You seem a bit tense."

"Who is Amber?"

"Amber? Oh you heard, sorry about that. Just teasing."

"So, who is she?"

"Just a nomad The Major ran into a long time ago. I don't know her personally."

"Not like he did then?"

"I think I'll go see what the girls are doing. Enjoy your breakfast."

He almost ran from the room looking awkward, so there was a story between Jasper and this Amber. Why couldn't I get a simple man, a man with no secrets, no strange history, or hang ups? Was I getting in too deep with another complicated man? Edward had driven me to depression and I wouldn't go there again. I was very grateful for all that these people had done for me and I was sure of my feelings for Jasper but after yesterday I wasn't so sure of his for me. This casual attitude to each others partners didn't sit right with me. Edward had said mates were in it for the duration and fiercely devoted to each other but I'd seen different to that and I had no intention in getting caught up in some kind of free for all.

Rose

Peter came in looking guilty,

"What's the matter? Have you upset Bella?"

"Me? No. She heard Ambers name mentioned and asked me about her."

"What did you say Peter?"

"Nothing honest. For fuck sake it's all in the past. Can't the girl take a joke?"

"Having been dumped by Edward, almost killed by a drug dealer, betrayed by the authorities, lost her father, what do you think?"

"None of that was our fault, well maybe Charlies death but it wasn't planned and we're trying to help with the rest. You go talk to her Rose, maybe she'll open up with you"

"I think maybe I should go. She got upset with Rose and The Major flirting last night"

"Is that why she was short with me this morning? I never gave it a thought. I'll talk to her Char"

I went back into the kitchen where Bella's bowl and mug were draining but she wasn't there so I went through to see her packing her things into a bag.

"Bella if I upset you last night flirting with Jazz I'm sorry. It was only in fun, it didn't mean anything, you're the one he's in love with"

She didn't answer but I saw tears running down her cheeks.

"Please believe me Bella, it was only fun."

"And Amber?"

"Bella you're blowing this up all out of proportion. Amber was a nomad Jazz met years ago before we knew him. They had a fling, a couple of weeks that was all. A comfort thing probably"

"Rose I can't be a comfort thing, I need someone who is serious about me"

"Jazz is"

"No, or he wouldn't have played along with you, he must have felt how much it hurt me but he never said a word. He never came to see me"

"That wasn't his fault. He was coming but Char put him off."

"Easily it seems, and now he's gone without even a goodbye. That's not the way it happens Rose or if it is in your world then Edward was right all along, I don't belong in it."