A/N: Ok.. here it is.. the chapter you have all been waiting for. Grab your kevlar or hunker down behind bulletproof glass cuz the fireworks are gonna fly!
Once again, I still don't own Twilight, I am just pretending to! Longer A/N at the bottom!
Chapter 24
All at once, there were congratulations and smiles. You could almost sense the excitement in the air. Esme rushed to Bella to give her a hug. "Welcome, my daughter." She kissed her gently on the forehead. I watched as Bella melted into Esme's embrace. She has never had a real mother figure in her life; I can see Esme filling that role nicely for her.
Alice bounced with joy and Jasper was just happy that we are happy. It will be nice to have her around, Edward. She will make a fine little sister. I nodded to let him know I appreciated his kind words.
Emmett wanted to be happy, but knew it would set off Rose. I can't wait, Edward. She will be a kick ass newborn. I hold back a laugh as he imagines her wrestling a bear. Somehow, I couldon't see Bella as the bear type of vampire.
Carlisle reached for Bella's hand and gave her an affectionate squeeze. "I am sure that it wasn't an easy choice for you, Bella." Rosalie let out a soft snort at that. Bella visibly tensed as did everyone else.
After a few seconds, her shoulders dropped and she replied to Carlisle."Yes, but it seemed to be the best choice for me and Edward." She gave me a beaming smile.
Again, Rose snorted and let out a mumbled, "Fucking idiot." It was loud enough that even Bella could hear. I watched as Bella curled her hands into fists in her lap, her face set into a grime line.
I wanted to throttle Rose. Her thoughts were swirling, angry and livid. She was barely hanging onto any semblance of control. I knew she was going to blow. My problem was that I had no way to get Bella away from her before it happened. I knew if I did, it wouldn't help. Her anger was directed at Bella and one way or another it was going to come out.
Trying to help, Carlisle continued on. "Have you given any thought to when you would like this take place?"
"Not much," she replied softly. "Edward and I hadn't talked much about it. I only got as far as making the choice. I hoped that you guys would be willing to help with the logistics of it all." Her hand gripped mine tightly. I could almost taste the fear and tension rolling off her.
Oh, shit, Edward! Alice's warning came seconds before Rose exploded.
"Our help?" She pushed away from the table, standing her entire body vibrated with unrestrained fury. "You want our fucking help in ending your life and lying to your father? You want our help in pretending to cry and mourn your loss? That's just classic." Rosalie's eyes were flashing at Bella and her mind was a chaotic swirl of anger and pain.
"Rosalie-" began Esme, but Bella silenced her with a raised hand.
"What the fuck is your problem with my choice Rosalie?" Her hand slammed on the table top. Everyone jumped at the outburst coming from Bella. "I don't remember asking for or needing your opinion." Bella's eyes were blazing with anger. Her entire body was trembling with the fierce emotions she was struggling to control.
Rosalie let out an eerie laugh; a slow calculating smile began to form. "The minute you decided that living your life as one of us, gave me more than enough reason to give you my opinion. When you decided to throw away your life, to carelessly toss away the options your life has to settle for a life with none- that's when my opinion mattered." Her breathing was coming out in tiny pants; she was charged up and itching for a fight.
The entire room froze. No one knew what to do or say. Alice was practically vibrating with giddiness. To her, this was a perfectly acceptable thing to be happening. She saw it as Rosalie finally getting what she was due. All I saw was danger and my need to protect Bella was in full swing.
Jasper was calculating the danger not only to Alice, but to Bella. His concern for my mate was heartwarming and meant so much to me. My parents were very worried about Bella. While they understood where Rose was coming from, they felt there was a better way to discuss this. What they didn't know was that this has been simmering for weeks now, ever since she knew I gave Bella a choice.
I silently begged Bella to step away, that nothing useful would come from this. We all knew Rose's position on this, there was no budging her. But when I saw the indignation flash in Bella's eyes, I knew my silent pleas were moot. To have her choice called into question, when I know she agonized over it, Bella couldn't let that go.
"You know nothing about me and how I struggled over this choice." She seethed at Rosalie. "How dare you question me about it." The room was silent, locked in watching this show down happen, unable to do anything to stop it. Even if we could, we all knew it was just going to happen at another time.
"I'll question any idiotic choice you make. You are a fucking child. You have no idea what you are giving up." Rose was in fine form, her hands were clenching and releasing sporadically. She was pacing in a small area of the dining room. "It's ridiculous to think that a life of endlessly repeating high school and college to be better than a real life of growing up, getting married, raising children, and having a career. You are giving up everything for nothing!"
I wasn't sure if anyone else noticed the tiny little flinch that Emmett gave off when she mentioned children. That was the one sore spot, the pink elephant that always resided in their relationship. It was times like these that made me pity him.
"Idiotic?" Bella's voice was shrill and she forcible pushed away from the table to stand. I automatically stood up next to her. Her fists were clenching and releasing along her sides, she was glaring at Rosalie. "Then why don't you explain something to the lowly human, Rosalie. Because right now, I don't get it, I honestly don't." She was shaking her head from side to side, like she was trying to figure out something complex.
"Explain to me that if you despise this life so much, if you hate what was done to you, why are you still here?" Beside me Alice was excited. Her mind was full of possible outcomes to this show down. She was cycling through them so rapidly, it was hard me to process them all. But it wasn't the visions that I honed in on; it was what she was thinking. She was cheering Bella on.
Bella paused, looking intently at Rosalie, who obviously didn't know what she meant and didn't want to ask. Sensing she may get no response, Bella forged on." Because it would seem to me, that as smart as vampires are, that if you really hated this life so fucking much, the solution would be easy, that even you would've thought of it." There was no doubt that Bella was insinuating that Rose's intellect was being called into question.
"I have no fucking idea what you're babbling about," spat Rose.
A cold smile stretched across Bella's face and it chilled me. "It's quite simple really," her voice was low and menacing, "make yourself a fucking fire and jump into it. Or, if you don't have the guts for that, find some nomadic vampire, pick a fight, don't try so hard and let them destroy you." She let that suggestion just hang there. All of us too shocked that she said it, all except Alice.
I knew that Bella had no idea how strong, how intense a vampire's sense of self preservation was. I doubt that even a depressed vampire could commit suicide by jumping into a fire. But I understood the point that Bella was attempting to make and I admit it was a damn good one.
"But, obviously your still here, maybe you're not that bright after all?" The tone in her voice was so matter of fact; it was eerie and kind of a turn on.
I liked this feisty Bella.
"So, why are you still here making everyone miserable? Is it because you can't find a way to be happy? Is that why you are so against Edward and me? Is it because as long as he was unhappy, there was someone who had it worse than you? But now that he has a chance to be happy, you're fighting tooth and nail against it. Because you'll be the unhappy one, you'll be the one people pity, not him."
Bella grew more impassioned the longer she spoke, her body betraying the calm she was trying to project. Her eyes were full of anger and her body shook with the fury she was trying to tamp down. The way she defended herself made me proud of her, the way she refused to take Rose's shit made me love her all that much more.
Rose stood with such a contemptuous look on her face, it would scare most people, but Bella was beyond any self preservation. I tried to listen in to Rose's thoughts, she was shocked that Bella was standing up to her. Even more surprising was that Rose felt Bella was too close to the truth, that she had thought those things in the beginning.
"I don't need to explain my life to you." Rose snarled the last word, trying to gain the upper hand once more.
But Bella just laughed at her attempt to intimidate which only angered Rosalie even more. By now, Esme and Carlisle had moved from their seats and moved into positions to intercept Rose if things got violent. Even Jasper had taken up a defensive position that guarded Alice and Bella.
"Fine, don't explain anything to me, I could care less." Bella gave a flippant wave of her hand. "But what I do care about is everyone else in this room. I care about the fact that they have tried to love you, give you a family and even help you find your way in this new life. But more than all that, I care about the fact that you are hurting the man you supposedly love and you don't even notice his pain."
There was an audible gasp in the room. "Bella," I implored. Bringing in ones mates is a dangerous thing to do. I watched as Rose's eyes narrowed into tiny slits as she processed Bella's words. I could see the need for Rose to protect what is hers. So concerned about Rose's reaction Jasper stood closer to Bella.
This did not go unnoticed by Rose who growled at Jasper. He let loose a low hiss as a warning. I was surprised that he hadn't stepped in to temper Rose's anger. I was sure that he knew she needed to let this go, she has been simmering with all of this negativity for far too long. I knew without a doubt that if Rose became a danger, Jasper wouldn't hesitate to take action.
"You leave Emmett the fuck out of this," she hissed. Her body was shaking with anger, I watched as she fought the urge to crouch, the instinct to take down a threat. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Emmett's defeated posture. His head was down and he was begging Bella to let it drop.
I stifled a gasp when I realized that Bella's words had cut Em deep, not because she said them, but because at times, he felt they were true and he didn't want Rose to know. He loved her so much; he would never let her see how much he hurt. I never saw it in the decades I lived with him. Yet Bella saw it after months of knowing him.
"Oh, come on. You brought him into all this." Bella gestured wide to encompass the whole family. "You brought him to Carlisle and begged him to change Emmett. Why did you do that if you hated this life? Why is that just perfectly fine for you to choose, but it's not okay for me to choose my mate! At least I know that Edward is mine." She thumped her chest. "But you," she pointed an accusatory finger at Rose, "you had no clue if he would accept you. So tell me why the fuck was it okay for you!"
Bella shouted the last word. She was riled up and furious. Her chest was heaving and her face was flushed.
"Maybe we need to take a step back and calm down," Carlisle broke in. But Rose and Bella never wavered from their staring contest. "We won't accomplish anything by yelling. We understand that emotions are running high."
"With all due respect Carlisle, I'd much rather finish this. It was going to happen one way or another and if it is all the same to you, I want to get it over with. Maybe then she will explain why she is a massive hypocrite." Bella never took her eyes off Rose who was staring at Bella with such utter contempt.
Carlisle took a step back but still remained close in case he was needed to run interference.
Bella took a small step towards Rose and I moved with her, I wanted to stay close, I didn't trust Rose to not lunge at Bella if things got any more heated.
"So come on Rose, enlighten us. How can you stand there railing against my choice when you didn't allow him to have the same choice? Hmm?" Bella's foot tapped impatiently waiting for Rose to say something.
We all knew why she did what she did, but Bella didn't. I only shared the bare minimum of Rose's story with Bella. I knew the rest would have to come from Rose if she wanted to tell it. What I am sure of is that only Jasper and I knew that Rose struggled to come to grips of that decision. She knew she was being hypocritical in doing what she did. Emmett reminded her too much of the child of her closest human friend. It was a child she adored and one that made her long for her own. She lucked out that Emmett never held her choice against her.
"I don't have to explain anything to you?" I could hear the tremor in Rose's voice. Her mind was filled with sadness, anger and desperation. Bella was hitting too close for comfort and Rose wass unsure how to deal with it.
Bella snorted, "Isn't that just fucking perfect. You expect me to explain and defend my choices, but the minute yours are called into question, you clam up. Nice double standard you have going there."
I had to admit, Bella had an extremely valid point.
I watched as Bella tapped one lone finger on her chin, I could tell she was thinking very hard about something.
"You know what, that doesn't matter. What is done is done and there is no need to rehash your hypocritical choice. Instead why don't explain how you can live with yourself because your entire relationship with Emmett is one walking contradiction." Once again that scary smile was back on her face. The urge in me to protect Bella grew.
My fingers twitched with the intense desire to pull Bella back and run.
Don't Edward! She will be fine. This has to be said. It is the only way both of them can get past this.
I didn't want to trust Alice, but I knew she would never place Bella in any danger. She loved her almost as much as I did. Still, I knew it was never a good idea to goad Rose, that was playing with fire and Rose almost always won.
"You know shit about my relationship with Emmett, Bella. If I were you, I would back the fuck off. You are treading on dangerously thin ice. I would hate for you to get hurt."
A low growl rumbled deep within me at Rose's implied threat. She threw me a withering glare. Fuck off, Edward. Your human thinks she can mess with me, well, she will see how wrong she is.
The growl grew in loudness and she just sneered at me.
Please, Bella, just walk away. I am begging you. Emmett's silent plea broke through and I chanced a glance at him. His head was still down, almost resting in his arms; he was looking at no one. His entire posture looked defeated. But it was his thoughts that surprised me the most. He was hurting, so very much.
Bella actually laughed at Rose's attempts to threaten her, she shook her head as she tried to rein in her laughter. "Oh come on, certainly your impressive vampire brain can see that while Emmett has never held your incredibly selfish decision against you, you are punishing him for something he has no control over." There was a hint of amusement in her voice. As if she really was surprised that Rose was clueless.
"What the fuck are you talking about? I'm not punishing him for anything!" Rose's voice was high and almost screeching in indignation at Bella's assumption.
"Really, Rosalie? It's true, you know. You are so wrapped up in your loathing in being a vampire, still bitter about all that you lost, that you can't see its killing Emmett. How do you think it makes him feel when he knows he can't give you what you want and that he will never be enough for you? Instead of trying to find joy, love and purpose in this life, you are hanging on to everything you have lost." Bella's voice went from anger to pity while she talked, then she turned to Emmett, who still refused to look up.
"Instead of reveling in a man who loves you and finding a way to make a life with him, you hold over him the one thing he can't give you. Your bitterness over this is punishing him." She took a deep breath; I could see the fight slowly leak out of her.
"This is where I will be a different vampire than you. I will see in Emmett the big brother I never had and will get for eternity. I'll ask him to teach me how to hunt bears and the art of practical jokes, Cullen style. I'll love him for his heart and the way he will always make me smile." She reached over the table and brushed his arm with her fingers.
"You will be enough for me, brother and I am sorry that you are hurting." For a tense few seconds, no one moved, waiting anxiously to see if he would respond. Then slowly he brushed her hand with his. It was all Bella needed, she smiled at him, even though he didn't see. Slowly she pulled her hand away.
Rose looked on bewildered and finally realizing that her mate hasn't spoken, but that small move of his hand spoke volumes. Finally someone acknowledged the pain he was in.
"It isn't true, is it, Em?" she whispered inching closer and closer to him. Still no response. She looked at Jasper and I, knowing we could confirm or deny Bella's accusations. I looked at Jasper who was looking at Emmett.
"He hid it well," was his only response and Rose crumpled back into her seat, shocked that just maybe Bella was right.
When the fight finally left Bella, she sagged and I caught her and pulled her close to me. I could see the unshed tears in her eyes. She hurt because Emmett hurt. I turned her to face me, putting a finger under her chin looking her in the eyes.
"I love you."
"Love you, too. Eternally yours," she whispered, reminding me of her pledge.
"Forever," was my vow back to her.
A/N: Sooooo what did ya think? Let me know!
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