Heart Of A Dragon
Author: Nightstar Fury from Nightstar Productions.
Rated:Mfor Mature.
Pairing:[Toothless/Hiccup].
Disclaimer:I do not own Dreamworks Dragons or How To Train Your Dragon.
25; His Choice.
His mouth hung open. His green eyes widened as much as they could. He couldn't even find his words after hearing what Fishlegs had said to him. Toothless the same hadn't said a word, hadn't done anything since hearing what he had. "Um...Hiccup? Did you hear what I said?" Fishlegs asked waving his hand in front of him slowly. At this point he didn't even know where he was. Whatever was wrong with him meant he and Toothless had to have sex to make him better!? What the hell illness involved that! Hiccup blinked a few times coming back to reality.
Outside Gothi's, Stoick and the others were waiting nervously for any kind of update on what was going on with Hiccup. "I wonder what made him so sick?" Snotlout stated finally.
"Don't know. Hopefully its nothing serious..." Astrid sighed softly.
"I'm sure he's fine." Dag stated calmly. Out of nowhere they heard a loud voice yell 'what' at the top of his lungs, all their eyes were on Gothi's hut now.
"Hiccup calm down..." Fishlegs said quickly.
"Calm down?...How the hell do you want me to do that with what you just said to me!" Hiccup asked angrily getting to his feet now.
"Hiccup...its okay...Relax love. Lets just hear them out..." Toothless said softly nuzzling his arm. Hiccup took a few breaths to calm down with his eyes closed before opening them once more to face Fishlegs and Gothi.
"Fine...Just...explain well." Hiccup said sitting back down.
"Hiccup, you're going in to heat because mating season is starting in 5 days. You're body is adjusting itself to go through with a mating. You did say that Night Furies who mate male to male change their organs didn't you?" Fishlegs asked.
"Well yeah but doesn't that happen after the dominance fight?" Hiccup asked looking to Toothless now who transformed.
"No offense love but you being part Night Fury and part human...your body already knows that you're the submissive one of us." Toothless replied calmly.
"Okay I guess that makes sense but...why the pain in my stomach, why the throwing up?" Hiccup asked trying to stay calm about it all.
"I don't know. This has never happened with other couples..." Toothless replied.
"Its because you're human too. Your body is different so it requires more of a change to handle mating and I assume breeding. Gothi says you're dragon features will come through too. The stomach pain is probably to adjust for eggs and the throwing up I assume is due to the warning that your heat is going to be worse if you don't mate this cycle. Being part Night Fury, the urges to mate are stronger. Your body is trying to be ready but you've been so...against it because of all that's been going on that your body and mind are fighting with one another and the effects of that are making you sick." Fishlegs explained.
"So am I going to...stay sick until Toothless and I mate? Hiccup asked.
"No, it should stop after mating season is up but Hiccup...this is going to get worse for you...You're going to stay sick all week in unimaginable pain, you won't be able to keep anything down...while you're night fury side can handle it...your human side won't...like with the eels. Your night fury side couldn't, but your human side could. Hiccup...I don't want to scare you or nothing...but this...has a chance of..." Fishlegs stopped seeing Hiccup's eyes widen.
"You're saying this could...kill me if I don't do it?" Hiccup breathed out. Fishlegs nodded slowly, this was to much for him at once. Hiccup got up and ran out of Gothi's hut and reached the edge, her hut was higher up and off ground level. He narrowed his eyes as he let his Night Fury attributes show and jumped off the ledge landing on the ground in a tuck and roll type move, then back to his feet and running off.
"HICCUP!" Toothless called jumping down and running after him quickly. Fishlegs sighed as he climbed down the stairs with his eyes closed.
"What's wrong, Fishlegs? What happened in there?" Stoick asked quickly.
"It's...not my place to say." Fishlegs said slowly.
"Its his time, isn't it?" Dag said suddenly. Fishlegs looked at him a little shocked. "Night Fury over here. Of course I know..." Dag rolled his eyes.
"What's going on?" Astrid asked now.
"Hiccup is part Night Fury, as such he gets the urges to mate just like the rest of us. His body is trying to adjust to allow it, but his mind isn't in sync. He loves my brother, but he's afraid to mate because of what he thinks of himself. If he doesn't do this...he is going to suffer physically for the next 5 days while his body prepares for mating with being ill and in pain. And it will continue during the week of mating. He is going to suffer for two weeks. His dragon side will handle it like we all do, his human side will not. He won't eat, sleep, move...because his body only wants one thing and if he doesn't give in to it, it may kill him. The human body can only handle so much before it gives out. And you told him that, didn't you Fishlegs?" Dag explained.
"Yeah, as soon as he realized he could die he ran out..." Fishlegs nodded.
"So you're saying that if Hiccup and Toothless don't mate this season...and before the 12 days is up...this could...kill him?" Snotlout asked trying to understand it.
"This is...all my fault...He thinks less of himself because of me...I have to fix this...I need to talk to him..." Astrid said quickly.
"Toothless won't let you near him right now..." Dag stated.
"I have to try..." Astrid said before running off after in the direction they'd gone too.
"Astrid!" Stoick called, to late she was out of earshot.
"I better go to so my brother doesn't fry her..." Dag said as he transformed and took off in the same direction.
(The Cove)
Hiccup was leaning against a rock near the lake with his knees pulled up in deep thought. 'No...No I can't...He won't...want me...' Hiccup told himself over and over again. Meanwhile Toothless was at the entrance of the cove, he saw Astrid and Dag coming, he growled a bit.
"Easy brother...She knows, I told them." Dag began returning to humanoid form.
"He doesn't want to see anyone right now. He even asked me to leave him be so he could think..." Toothless sighed.
"Let me talk to him, Toothless..." Astrid said.
"No chance. He doesn't need it right now." Toothless replied quickly.
"Look...this is my fault he's like this...I can fix this...but you need to give me a chance, Toothless...please?" Astrid begged firmly.
"You don't know you can fix this...you might make it worse. Just let him figure it out..." Toothless stated, they all heard Hiccup yell out in pain again.
"Do you want to listen to that for the next 12 days! Do you want to lose him!" Astrid growled now, it was a bold move but she wasn't backing down this time. She was going to prove to him what he asked her to prove, that she wanted Hiccup's happiness. Toothless looked down now wondering what to do. "I caused this, Toothless. If it weren't because of me...he'd be ready and in the right mind. None of us want to see him in pain or sick, I know you heard Fishlegs...This could kill him, Toothless. Please...I really will throw myself off the cliff if he dies because of what I did...Now I am begging you...give me a chance to talk to him. I did this to him...so I'm the only one that can undo it...Please Toothless...just give me this one chance...you don't want to lose him, none of us do...I can do this..." Astrid pleaded him.
Hearing Hiccup throw up harshly again he sighed heavily he lowered his head. "You have 20 minutes. The first sign I see of him hurt...I'm pulling you out." Toothless said firmly.
"Thank you. You won't regret this." Astrid nodded as she watched Toothless move aside from the entrance and she made her way down and slowly towards Hiccup.
"Trust her, Draken...it's going to be rough, they will argue...but she'll get through to him." Dag said putting a hand on his brother's shoulder.
"I hope you're right, Dag...because Hiccup's life is riding on this." Toothless said with worry looking back in to the cove.
Astrid took a deep breath as she stood 2 feet away from him cautiously. "Hi–Hiccup?" Astrid said, her nerves were out of control but she had to focus.
"Leave me alone, Astrid...I don't need it right now..." Hiccup warned coldly.
"I didn't come to give you trouble...I just want to talk...please?" Astrid asked softly.
"Can't you hear me. I said to leave me alone." Hiccup snarled angrily. Astrid rolled her eyes as she moved beside him now and put a hand on his shoulder gently making him whip around and face her.
"Alright. I asked nicely and now I'm telling you. We need to talk, and I'm not leaving until we do." Astrid said with more force. Toothless wanted to rush in but Dag held him back. Hiccup didn't say anything at first as he looked in her eyes, they weren't angry. They were soft and full of concern. He'd only seen them once before and that was when he first woke up after fighting the red death.
"I don't want to talk, Astrid. I have to much on my mind to just talk." Hiccup sighed.
"Then just listen." Astrid grumbled, "I know what's going on, Hiccup. We all saw you rush out of Gothi's...Dag told us." Astrid began. Hiccup tensed a bit and looked away from her. "We know you're in pain and sick. We know its because of mating season. And we know it won't stop until mating season is over...but the main thing we know is that this could kill you." Astrid said.
"So you see why I don't want to talk then." Hiccup mumbled.
"No, Hiccup. It's why you need to talk...We know you need to mate Toothless, your body is trying to prepare for it...but...your mind isn't in sync and it's making you sick. Hiccup...you know what needs to be done...why are you hesitating? You love Toothless more than anything..." Astrid asked. She knew the answer but she needed him to talk to her so she had to give him something to answer.
"I do love him and I want too I'm just..." Hiccup trailed off.
"Scared?" Astrid asked as he glanced at her a few moment before looking away with his eyes closed. "I know you are. And I know why...Toothless told me, Hiccup. No...he showed me. The first time you two got intimate...and you freaked out in a panic...thinking you weren't good enough for him and that...is because of me." Astrid sighed.
"H–he showed you that?" Hiccup was a little shocked now.
"He did...a week ago after you got hurt by my dagger...Showed me how much damage I did with the things I said to you...And I spent 25 minutes begging Toothless to give me a chance to explain...to give me a chance to talk to you..." Astrid looked away.
"Explain what?...There's nothing...to explain." Hiccup said.
"No Hiccup...there is a lot to explain...and first off...I need you to know...how sorry I am for what I said to you last month when we broke up..." Astrid saw Hiccup turn his head quickly, this was going to get hard. They were in the same spot as they were that day. He didn't want to remember it all again.
"Don't bring it up." Hiccup said coldly.
"I am going to. Because you need to know everything...What I said to Toothless in order to get him to let me talk to you...You are hesitating your mating to Toothless because you can't get what I said to you out of your mind. I didn't just cause you physical pain, I caused emotional damage...you weren't damaged before...you are because of me. So please...let me say what I have to say..." Astrid asked him.
"You have 10 minutes..." Hiccup mumbled still looking away.
"First of all...your soon to be mate is a stubborn asshole...and its incredibly hard to get him to listen to reason." Astrid sighed out.
"Watch it Hofferson!" Toothless growled to her.
"Case and point! Moving on...I can't prove to you that I'm sorry...all I can do is just say it and hope you believe me. I know that I hurt you...and I will live with it for the rest of my life...knowing I lost you...and that it's my fault. I don't blame you for hating me, Hiccup. I never wanted to hurt you and I realized too late that it didn't matter. I was a fool, an idiot." Astrid began softly as Hiccup opened his eyes but didn't look over at her.
"I don't hate you, Astrid...I hate what you did to me...I never did anything but give you my undivided attention and love...and you took my heart and crushed it. I recall hearing it shatter when you told me you wouldn't marry me, and didn't want to be with me anymore..." Hiccup said quietly.
"Let me finish..." Astrid said, he gave a nod. "When I talked to Toothless...I told him these exact words, last week...when you showed me how much damage I did to him...'I realized how wrong I was and all I've wanted is a chance to apologize. I know I can't make it right and I don't expect forgiveness...But I just want to apologize to him, face to face. No fighting, or screaming...I lost Hiccup because of me and I was wrong to take it out on you, and hurt him further. When Hiccup and I broke up...as mad and hurt as he was...he wished me to find happiness and I...wished the same. He found it, in you...and I went back on what I'd hoped for. Truth is...I love Hiccup...and I always will...but there is a difference between loving someone...and being in love with someone. I loved Hiccup...but I wasn't in love with him. If...I was in love with him...I wouldn't of hurt him as badly as I did, I wouldn't of hurt him at all...he's in love with you as you are with him...He's happy and I should of seen sooner and let it go...I'm sorry I pushed the limits. I'm sorry that I tried to kill you and ended up hurting him. I'm sorry for it all Toothless...I really am...I just...want Hiccup to be happy. Its all I've ever wanted for him...whether its with me or you doesn't matter. His happiness does...that's all that matters to me. If he's happy...so am I...'." Astrid recited.
"So its still the same. You didn't love me like I loved you..." Hiccup sighed.
"Hiccup...don't you understand. I did love you, I still do. A part of me always will...but I wasn't in love with you. Just like you weren't in love with me...And before you say anything...think about it...Yes we loved one another...but if we were in love...if we were soul mates...our break up wouldn't of happened. We'd still be together...married by now. But it didn't happen that way. Something my mother always told me...is that everything that happens...happens for a reason. This...us, Hiccup...wasn't meant to be." Astrid said with a soft smile.
"I guess I can't argue with that...but then why Astrid...why did you lie for so long...those leg comments...god they never stop...haunting me." Hiccup asked finally looking at her.
"I'll tell you what I told Toothless when he asked me the same thing before you returned to the village feeling sick..." Hiccup nodded her ready to hear it, "'Honestly...I don't know. I did love him, I still do. I fell in love with him when we took the flight on you...and then the fight with the red death, the thought of losing him scared me. But when it was all over, and he had woken up...I knew I wanted to be with him. And it just went from there...I didn't mean the hurtful things I said to him...I just didn't want him to try and keep getting me back...I–I wanted him to be mad enough not to come back...but I wanted him to know I still loved him and it just...all came off so badly, so wrong and I hurt him a lot...I know I can't take it back...and it makes me a terrible person...I don't think he's less of a man...its just...the leg thing...freaks me out...I wanted to let him down easy...that's why I said I didn't love him...but he kept pushing...and I just...exploded in a fit and said more than I wanted too...I never wanted to bring up the leg thing...it wasn't supposed to come out...and I'm sorry...I'm so sorry Toothless...Please believe I never wanted to hurt him...'." Astrid took a breath to continue.
"When he asked why I lied for so long, this is what I told him. 'Because I didn't want to hurt him...I dealt with the leg thing for a while...but it just...I don't know...I couldn't handle it one day but I saw how happy he was and tried to force myself to deal with for him...and I know that was wrong of me...in the ring...seeing how much I actually hurt him...is when I realized the leg thing didn't matter...because it was just something on the outside...and I'd fallen for Hiccup because of who he was on the inside...and I was an idiot to think differently of him because of his leg...that's why I wanted him back...I knew I made a mistake but the damage had been done...and he didn't want me back anymore...and I'll accept living with that for the rest of my life...but I still...want to apologize to him...and try to do whatever I can to let him know that...I'm happy for him and that's all I've ever wanted whether its with me or you...please Toothless...Please...I'm so sorry...'." By this point, Astrid found herself crying again just like she had when she said to Toothless.
"I know you never wanted to hurt me Astrid, but you did...and now I can't seem forget about it...I don't even...feel like me anymore. Like I don't know who I am..." Hiccup closed his eyes.
"Then let me remind you. If anyone know who you are...its me. Because I loved you for who you are. Hiccup you are a smart, kind, caring, gentle man. You have risked your life...many times for me and this village and all with the help of Toothless. You have the biggest heart, and widest smile that can turn anyone's bad day in to a good day. You're funny too. I love the sarcastic humor you have. You're strong, brave, and courageous. You can come up with a plan on the fly, hell you fly the best. No one else in this village has a Night Fury...and you Hiccup...you and Toothless have a bond stronger than friends, than rider and dragon...you two are lovers. And Toothless loves you with his everything...we all see that. Even me. I'm sorry I didn't see it before. But Hiccup..." She said with her hand on his shoulder so he'd look at her. "I was wrong to say that missing leg made you less of a man because honestly...it makes you a better man than anyone in the tribe. You lost your leg...saving this village, saving our people, and ending a war. You gave the biggest sacrifice for us and we are all eternally grateful to you and I know with all of my being...that you will make the best chief we've ever had." Astrid smiled lightly.
"I don't feel that way..." Hiccup sighed again.
"Hiccup, you've always known when someone is lying by looking in their eyes. So look at me...and listen to me...I mean what I say. I am sorry that I hurt you. They are things I said that I can never take back. But everything I said...was just because I was scared, of the commitment. And I realized that when you were telling our parents that lie about why we broke up. You're right, I was afraid of getting married and having kids, fearing you'd never be around because you were busy with the village...But what I said about your leg...yes...it freaks me out but...it does not...hear me? Does NOT define who you are. And like I said...if we were meant to be, Hiccup...we would be. I am happy for you...I want you to be with Toothless. We both...wished for each other's happiness. You found yours. I'm still looking." Astrid said.
"I–I believe you, Astrid but this feeling..." Hiccup began.
"Sssh. No buts. You love Toothless right?" Hiccup nodded, "And he loves you too. You're not less of a man. You're not incomplete. And you are whole. You are definitely all here, Hiccup. And you know what else...if you were any of those things before...You're not anymore because Toothless completes you, just like you complete him. You two complete each other. We all care about you, so stop fighting what is meant to be. You know Toothless loves you no matter what. Just like me...he loves you for who you are inside, Hiccup. Your leg being gone is the same as Toothless's tail being gone...you took his tail, he took your foot. All by accident and you know what else I think..." Astrid said as she got up and helped him to his feet.
"What?..." Hiccup asked a little surprised at her actions.
"I think...it was supposed to happen. You both losing something to one another. Because look how far its gotten you. You two defeated the red death, Alvin, and Dagur...well Dagur twice now...You guys losing what you did...only make you closer. You and Toothless are meant to be...You know that in your heart, soul, mind, and body. You have nothing to be afraid of. Like you said a week ago...those who truly care will always stand with you. Your father does, the village does, Toothless does...and so do I." Astrid smiled happily now.
"Y–you really mean that?" Hiccup asked her.
"Every word, Hiccup. Now I want you to get up there, kiss Toothless and tell him you want him to ravage your body until neither of you can move. Tell him to mate you. He won't hurt you, believe and trust in that. Because you two don't just love one another...you belong together forever." Astrid gave a firm nod. Hiccup couldn't help it, he felt a smile come to his face as he hugged Astrid tightly taking her by surprise.
"Thank you, Astrid...You don't know how much this means to me..." Hiccup whispers as Astrid smiled and hugged him back. She grinned now as she pulled away and took his hand leading him up the rocks and in front of Toothless who was looking confused and worried. Him and Dag hadn't heard what was said because human form hearing didn't have as good as dragon hearing did. Astrid took Toothless's hand and placed it with Hiccup's as she stepped back. She cleared her throat a bit motioning for Hiccup to say what she'd told him too.
Hiccup blushed as he leaned in and kissed Toothless deeply, they held it a moment before breaking apart. "I–I take you feel better?" Toothless asked.
"I do, Tooth and...I decided that...I want to mate you, tonight. I want you to ravage my body until neither of us can move." Hiccup blushed darkly as Toothless's mouth hung open in shock.
"What did you say to him?" Toothless asked looking at Astrid.
"Only what he needed to hear. Now...off with you two. See you in the morning!" Astrid said as she grabbed Dag's hand and pulled him away from the cove. Toothless looked at Hiccup now who was smiling softly.
"I don't suppose you're going to tell me, are you?" Toothless asked.
"Later...for now...I want you to cure me." Hiccup laughed a little. Toothless grinned as he nodded to Hiccup.
"We'll mate tonight if that is what you want, Hiccup. I don't want you to feel like you have too." Toothless said.
"I want this, Tooth. I want you. Now and forever more." Hiccup smiled.
"Then tonight we'll make that happen. I love you, Hiccup." Toothless leaned in towards him.
"I love you too, Toothless." Hiccup replied as he leaned in and their lips met in a deep, passionate kiss.