It wasn't until three days after his conversation with Jim that Spock got the chance to speak with Sybok again. While his brother left his meager supply of personal belongings on the couch in Spock's apartment, he went out for most of the day everyday, doing something that Spock hadn't quite gotten a clear answer on yet.

It was the weekend, though, which meant that Spock could wake up early enough to catch up with his brother without having to worry about rushing off to school. He made himself some coffee, and then waited patiently for Sybok to rise.

When his brother did get up, he wandered into the kitchen, looking remarkably sleepy, and therefore vulnerable. It was still something Spock was not used to seeing for anyone, but especially not anyone raised Vulcan. Even his mother had stricter control of herself, and Spock couldn't remember her ever looking as… soft as Sybok did in that moment.

He handed his brother a mug of coffee, and Sybok gratefully accepted it, cradling it in his hands like it was something absolutely precious to him. He took a sip, and let out an exaggerated hum of delight. "I don't know where you buy this stuff, but it's definitely the best coffee I've had in years."

Spock shrugged. "It is adequate."

Sybok snorted. "You can't fool me, man. No Vulcan would be able to justify spending more money on something like coffee when cheaper stuff would be just as effective at providing caffeine and the other benefits that coffee brings. You buy it 'cause you love it too much to live without it, huh?"

Spock took another sip from his own mug in lieu of answering. "I was wondering when you planned to reveal to me your reasons for having come to find me. I have been curious about your intentions, but you've yet to actually explain them to me."

Sybok sighed, and chugged down the rest of his drink, and then set the mug down in the sink before beckoning for Spock to follow him into the living room. He moved aside the blanket he'd been using so that they could both settle down on the couch, and after a minute, I-Chaya leapt up and crawled onto Spock's lap. He pet her absent-mindedly as he looked at his brother, waiting for answers.

Sybok leaned back against the arm of the couch. "I guess in a way you should already know what I want. You must know as well as anyone why I was banished from the Vulcan communities."

"Because you attempted to abolish the Vulcan council," Spock answered easily.

Sybok nodded. "Yes. They consider me to be a radical, because I believe that the Vulcan way is wrong. They live for far longer than is natural, and yet do absolutely nothing to try and help any other people around them. They repress emotions to an unhealthy degree, and I think that the only way to live is with emotion. And if one does want to be Vulcan, it should be a choice, not something forced upon them from birth so that they know nothing else."

Spock offered a small smile. "When I spoke to Jim the other day, he told me that he believes Vulcans perhaps feel things even more strongly than non-Vulcans do. His theory is that Vulcans began to be what they are because they were afraid of pain, and that fear is one of the strongest emotions a person can feel."

"Ah, I think I like your Jim, even if I haven't met him yet." Then he let out a soft sigh. "Anyways, the point is that I've basically made it my mission in life to change the Vulcan way. I won't force an integration that they have no interest in, but I will insist on certain things changing. I'm not foolish enough to believe that I could ever accomplish such a great task on my own, but in my time since my exile, I have worked to gain allies and support for my cause. Perhaps it was rather presumptuous of me, but when I learned that you had left the community to take a job in a predominantly non-Vulcan area, I thought that it might be what led you to opening your eyes on certain matters. I had never thought that it would be through such dramatic means, or I promise you I would have come much sooner. I never wanted to see you get so hurt, because you are my brother. Perhaps you'll think me selfish for this, but now that you have been hurt, I want to use that to my advantage. I want to win you over to my side, and earn your support in the fight ahead."

Spock furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "What do you possibly think that I could do to help? I already have a reputation for being 'too Vulcan for the Vulcans', so I doubt that your current supporters would approve of me at all. And if you're hoping for something as drastic as Father's sympathies, I can assure you that you will be unable to gain them through any means, including me."

Sybok shook his head. "Don't misunderstand. You hold no valuable connections that I could utilize. That is not why I want your help. I want you on my side to be you. You are a highly intelligent man, and you have always been good at seeing solutions that I overlooked. And my followers will accept you amongst them because they know how important you are to me, and to our future. If you were 'too Vulcan for the Vulcans', then the fact that you have changed will be seen as solid proof that being Vulcan is not inevitable for anyone, regardless of the circumstances of their birth."

It was strange to think that Sybok would go through so much trouble to seek out Spock because he actually believed that it would be useful to work together for his revolution. "What could I actually do to help though?" he asked doubtfully.

"Well…" Sybok trailed off, and bit his lip nervously. "You'd probably have to leave your job," he admitted. "We're always on the move to find more people, and once others hear of your allegiance with my cause, they might not be as happy about supporting you anymore."

Spock frowned. "Like you said, I work in a predominantly non-Vulcan school. I would think that the people there would be perfectly content with the idea of converting more Vulcans away from what they were raised to know."

"Maybe so, but it's not just your coworkers I'm talking about. I was exiled from the Vulcan community, Spock. Do you realize what that means? I can visit Father on rare occasion, though I basically have to stay in his house the entire time to avoid seeing how much the other Vulcans don't like me. And even after I left home the first time, the unofficial aspects of my punishment weren't over. I was chased and threatened, and attacked in such vicious ways that you wouldn't think any Vulcan would be capable of it. I'm not going to lie to you Spock. Throwing your lot in with me is dangerous. There are a lot of people opposed to my ideas, even among non-Vulcans."

"Why would non-Vulcans disapprove?"

Sybok sighed, and tipped his head back to stare up at the ceiling. "Many of them see Vulcans as a way of making themselves feel better. Knowing that Vulcans exist makes them feel better about their own lives, because they see it as an inferior way of living. They often pity Vulcans for their lack of emotion, and act as though they are lucky to not be Vulcans. Though it is never something that they would admit out loud, and in some cases they probably aren't even consciously aware of it, people feel like they need Vulcans in the world. And there is also the added benefit of giving them the idea that if they ever reach rock bottom, feeling as low down as they could possibly get, they will always have the option of becoming Vulcan and making it all go away."

They were both silent for a minute until Spock thought of something to say. "Did you you ever read that case study about the dying convert?" Sybok shook his head, looking curious, so Spock explained. "There was a non-Vulcan man who found out that he had stage three lung cancer that had somehow not been caught on any tests or scans sooner. The doctors gave him an estimate of a year to live. The man was quite disturbed by the news, understandably, and he went through his treatments with no hope that they would actually help. Eventually, he went to a nearby Vulcan town, and he began the process of converting. Of course, it is typically a long term process, and he was in a particularly emotionally volatile state to begin with.

"Eight months after his diagnosis, one of his lungs collapsed and he was rushed to the hospital. Nobody thought he was going to live for very long after that. The man called his Vulcan contacts to come and spend his final days in the hospital with him. He said that he was tired of feeling afraid, and wanted them to help him stop.

"Two weeks later, the doctors ran some more tests and found that the cancer had stopped spreading. The weaker lung had not magically repaired itself, but had begun to heal, which was already more than anyone expected. The man had been on his deathbed, but he managed to finish becoming a Vulcan."

Sybok laughed. "Become Vulcan for the cool factor, stay for the free health insurance. What better deal are you going to find in America?"

Spock blinked a few times. "Oh. I'm probably going to have to buy some health insurance, now that I think about it."

Sybok shrugged. "Well, you don't have to. I was too big of a face in the news at the time, but I know others who just chose to never report their conversions, and they just do their best to make sure they don't get hurt at all. Though it can be rather difficult sometimes, I suppose, when you're used to being able to handle all kinds of dangerous situations without any risk to your health."

"I wouldn't want to risk it."

Sybok laughed again. "Even now, you're going to play the goodie two shoes?"

Spock shrugged. "Someone in this family has to, and it certainly does not seem as though it will be you."

"Hey, Spock, you should know, even if you decide you don't want to join me, I'm still going to love you. Nothing's going to stop you from being my brother, man. I just don't want you to feel as though it's the only way for us to keep up with this thing where we actually act like siblings. I mean, we'll see each other a lot less, since I have to head back out with the others soon, but we'll make it work, I promise. And you don't have to give me any solid answer right now. I don't need to hit the road for another two weeks or so."

Spock hesitated for a moment, and then reached out to pat his brother's shoulder. "I am sorry, Sybok, but I cannot go with you. I am just beginning to build a life here for myself, and I don't think that I have it in me to abandon it so easily to start over somewhere else. Living on the road is not for me. And besides that, there are people here who need me."

There was an understanding smile on Sybok's face, which almost made Spock feel even more guilty about having to reject his brother. "Jim?"

"Among others," Spock admitted. "I have other students as well, you know. And I-Chaya would not be happy having to be so thoroughly contained in order to keep her from running off in the middle of a caravan." He pet the cat's head, and she flicked her tail out to smack gently against Sybok's arm. "I truly am sorry that I cannot be what you wish of me. If there is anything I can do to help from a distance, know that I will."

Sybok shrugged. "It was always a long shot. To be honest, even if I'd known with one-hundred percent certainty that you would turn me down, I still would have come here. I should not have waited so long to try and find you. You were always so important to me when we were children, and yet I feel as though I abandoned you when I left for the sake of my mission."

"I never felt abandoned," Spock assured him. "I knew that you had more important things that took priority over your younger brother. Family cannot, and should not, always come first."

"Even still, I'm sorry. I should have at least made some attempt to see you sooner. But I was so bitter with Father for not trying to fight in my defense that I did not want to return home, and that's the only place where you could be found until so very recently."

That was surprising. Not that Sybok hadn't wanted to go home, because Spock couldn't blame him for that. Returning to the only Vulcan place he was even still allowed to see his family didn't sound like it would be more interesting than continuing on with the revolution that he was planning. No, there was a different part of that statement that took Spock somewhat by surprise. "Father did fight in your defense."

Sybok shook his head. "No, when I asked, he…" he trailed off, a thoughtful look on his face. "He told me that he could not defend someone and risk losing his position in the community unless he felt that they were committed to their argument with everything that they had in them. He never actually said that didn't think I had that commitment, so I guess he never actually said he wouldn't defend me." Sybok let out a slightly bitter chuckle. "See, this is why Vulcans suck. Nothing can ever just be easy with them, and I don't understand why."

Spock couldn't help it; he found himself laughing out loud at the look on Sybok's face. "So you choose to rebuke Vulcans because they are too clever for you to figure out what they are saying?"

"No!" Sybok protested loudly, but then he started laughing as well. I-Chaya suddenly leapt away from Spock, and landed on his brother's lap instead, where she gently headbutted him in the arm until he began to pet her. "I can see why you'd want to stay here for her. She seems like a good cat."

"She is." Now probably wasn't the right time to try and explain how I-Chaya seemed to be far more than the average cat at times, all things considered. She was the most polite pet he'd ever seen before, for one thing. And there was the fact that the only time she'd ever even tried to run away was when she wound up with Jim and had given Spock a chance to try and help the teen, at least a little bit.

After a few minutes of silence, Sybok's stomach growled loudly, and he shot Spock a sheepish grin. "I don't suppose you're any good at cooking? I was never sure of whether that counted as a passionate skill that requires emotions, or not."

Spock rolled his eyes. "If you're willing to drag your lazy ass into the kitchen, you can watch and learn." It was nice to know that there was at least one thing that he was better at than his brother, especially now that he knew 'being Vulcan' needed to be crossed off of that list.