The characters belong to DC and Time-Warner, and I in no way own them or plan to make money off of them, but the story belongs to me.

Chapter 25

Second Thoughts

Watch Tower

Starfire felt the passion and emotion burning inside of her, a passion she had not felt in years. Her breathing was heavy and legs were suddenly weak. She sat down to catch her breath; her mind had only one thought, her heart felt only one desire, Richard. It was a good thing that he left when he did because she felt her emotions losing control and she feared that in her desire for him, she may have injured him while quelling her passion. She closed her eyes in attempt to compose her thoughts, it was hard, but she had the discipline to do it.

She focused on her breathing to calm herself and as she did the glow of her skin subdued to its normal shade of orange. She had thoughts of how things would be if Richard's Hoteshna worked. She would be free to do as she pleased, to…

Her thoughts changed, in her joy she remembered what the outcome of the Hoteshna if accepted would mean, she would not be free, instead by Tamaranean law she would become Richard's wife and he her husband. Though at one time this would have been a pleasant outcome to her, it was not now. She wondered if Richard understood this, and she thought that he did not.

Starfire held her bowed head in her hands, tears now falling from her eyes. She would be forced into a marriage of law, not one of love or even state, but of law because of an oversight made by her k'norfka years ago. She held her head up and breathed deeply to gain her composure in case Nightwing returned. She remembered her Kolas tik Nal training and used the discipline it taught her to remove the emotions from her mind, locking them away. She could not allow herself to think of Richard in way other than Nightwing, a hero of Earth and not her former lover and possibly future husband. Now was not the time, now was the time to get through this ordeal and to do so with a warrior's mind and heart. She must talk to Nightwing as soon as possible, but first she had to research what she feared might be true.

Starfire activated the console in the room she was in and accessed the Tamaranean database, the Galactic Legal database and the tenants of Inter-stellar law. It was as she feared, the marriage would be legal and binding not only on Tamaran, but throughout the Galaxy, including Earth. She was sure Nightwing was not aware of this and only though it would release her from her marriage to Ph'yzzon. Instead, per law, her marriage to Ph'yzzon would be made null and the records would indicate that she and Nightwing would be married for the last 14 years.

She did not know how long she had been staring at the viewer when the intercom buzzed shaking her from the trance she was in. Starfire activated the intercom from the console to see who it was.

"Yes, what is the matter?" She asked.

"Starfire, Nightwing is here to see you again."

Starfire took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She quickly checked herself in the provided mirror and wiped away the smudges caused by her tears. She composed her herself and answered Captain Atom back.

"Yes, please Captain Atom send Nightwing in,' Starfire said as she stood up to face Nightwing.

"Yes ma'am," Captain Atom acknowledged then the door slid opened and Nightwing walked in with a satisfied smile on his face.

"Hey Kori, I have some good news. The Hoteshna was accepted and your sister and husband have agreed to come aboard the Watch Tower to go over the particulars. Soon you won't have to worry about them at all and you can do what you want to do."

Starfire looked down and sighed, "I see."

Nightwing looked at her, confusion clearly on his face.

"Kori, what's wrong? You'll be free soon and can go where ever you like. The Justice League will no longer hunt you and you will no longer a fugitive of Tamaranean justice. Isn't that what you wanted?" Nightwing said reaching out to her.

Starfire pulled back, wrapping her arms around herself and shaking her head. "Richard, it is not that simple…"

Nightwing stepped back, a little taken aback at Starfire's current demeanor. "Did I do something wrong? I didn't mean too if I did… I mean you seemed happy about the Hoteshna thing when I told you about it earlier."

Starfire looked up at him, smiling just a little. "I was Richard, when you told me I was ecstatic and remembered why I loved you all those years ago. Then after you left I remembered what the outcome would be."

NIghtwing shrugged and shook his head slightly, holding his hands out to her, "I don't understand Kori."

Starfire could see the confusion on his face and she felt pity for him. She walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Richard, by them accepting the Hoteshna it means that not only will my marriage to Ph'yzzon be dissolved, but it also means the marriage we were to have would be put in force. In other words you and I would be married per Tamaranean law as if we have been for the last fourteen years."

Nightwing scrunched his face, then chuckled, "Well after they leave we can annul it, you'll be free to do what you want if that's the issue."

Starfire narrowed her eyes at Nightwing, "This is not a laughing matter Nightwing," the use of his hero persona and the tone of her voice made him take a step back and raise his hands a little.

Starfire rolled her eyes and humphed, "Of course you do not have the understanding, why would you, you are a human and from a culture that views marriage as a fleeting thing and divorce is a common remedy. This is a Tamaranean marriage and we do not have divorce. The only way to dissolve a marriage is by death or a valid Hotshna, which in turn leads to another marriage. To my people divorce is an unheard of and alien concept."

Nightwing looked away, then back at Starfire, "Do you mind if a take a seat, I'm feeling a little light-headed at the moment. "

She nodded and he sat down in one of the chairs in the room then rested his elbows on his knees and lowered his head and resting it in his hands. He took a deep breath, then took off his mask and looked up at Starfire.

"Are you positively sure about this Starfire? I mean this is Earth after all and like you said things work different here."

"I am positively sure Richard. By the time this is all over, we will be husband and wife until 'death do us part.' This will be a Tamaranean marriage Richard not an Earthly one, based on the original betrothal and because of the Hoteshna. Had I remembered what the implications were, I would have insisted that you not go through with it and let me deal with it. My sister had hinted of another option, one that was risky but may have worked. I did not fully understand myself until a few moments ago, so I do not hold ill will against you. It just makes me sad that it is not what we both want."

Nightwing jerked his head up, "What do you mean it's not what we both want? You don't want to marry me?"

"Richard, no, and neither do you want to marry me at least not now anyway. A marriage between us now would only be one of law and not of love. It would be no different than my marriage to Ph'yzzon only worse, because it is forced upon us after horrible traumas in both our lives. If you still loved me then maybe it would be different, but you just lost the woman you loved in a most horrible way and I am being accused by my current husband of treason and he wishes to see me executed. My heart is broken and I know yours is too, and we are both not ready for this. I wish things were different between us, but they are not and the reality is there is no changing it now."

Nightwing was quiet for what seemed an eternity to Starfire. "What if in my demands, I state that all I want is your freedom and that you do not have to marry me?"

Starfire shook her head, "No, it does not work like that, if you were to reject the marriage, then Ph'yzzon and the Crown have the right to counter your claim and make whatever demands they like. Knowing Ph'yzzon, he would demand your head as a trophy, X'hal only knows what my sister would demand of you, the Titans and the people of Earth. Since the Hoteshna was accepted, we have go through with the marriage, like it or not."

Nightwing clasped his hands together, then pursed his lips. He then sat back in the chair and ran his fingers through his hair. "You're right Star, I'm not ready. I haven't even had time to grieve for Catalina and now I'm going to be married. It's too much.

He stood up and started to pace around the room. "I thought I was doing the right thing by helping you out here. I never realized the commitment I'd have to make too."

He paced around the room more, clearly becoming more agitated as he thought about it. "Dammit Starfire, how in the world did I get myself in this mess? I thought you were gone… out of my life. You return and my life has been a mess ever since, and now you're back in my life until my dying breath. It's all like some bad joke! The gods surely are laughing now!"

Starfire's eyes began to glow and she snarled at Nightwing. "I did not do the asking of what happened to me either Richard! I did not ask to be betrayed by you and I certainly did not ask for the life I lived for the past fourteen years! Nor did I ask for the horrors in my life before I came to Earth all those years ago, but they happened! You did not ask for your parents to die or to become a hero because of it! You did not ask to form the Teen Titans after I came to Earth, you wanted to be alone, but it happened. We do not ask for anything that life hands to us, but it happens! I did not ask you to come to my rescue when the Justice League wanted to arrest me! I did not ask you to hide me or protect me, I could have taken care of myself, but you did! You Richard John Grayson could have left me alone and not be in the "mess" that you are in and live the life you wanted, but you did! IT WAS YOUR CHOICE TO GET INVOLVED WHEN YOU DID NOT HAVE TO AND NOW YOU WANT TO BLAME ME FOR YOUR INTERFERENCE! YOU ARE SELFISH, INCONSIDERATE KLORBAG!"

Nightwing was frozen in shock and Starfire's outburst. He'd never seen her like this and it frightened him. Her tirade woke him up though she was right; in his frustration and arrogance he blamed Starfire for something that was not her fault. Had he let things be and let the Justice League arrest her and let justice be served he wouldn't be here. He realized now it was his impulsive need to protect her, a being far more powerful and wiser than he ever would be, that put him now in a position he didn't want. It was then he realized that he was selfish. His need to protect her was a way to appease his guilt, his need to constantly try to step in and take care of her was a selfish desire to be a hero to her. Now because of this he was responsible for everything that had happened the past few months and he needed to be a man about it. He fell to his knees and whispered something quietly.

Starfire stopped her tirade when she noticed Nightwing was down on his knees, his hands held out and his head bowed. He was saying something, but she could not hear him.

"What? What are you saying to me?"

He looked up at her, the resignation clearly evident on his face, "Forgive me, you're right. I should not have interfered. I always knew you could take care of yourself, but I had to be the hero and protect you. I'm sorry. I'll leave now if you wish."

Starfire stared at him and blinked, not knowing what to say. She stood there just staring at him, so he slowly stood up and turned to head to the door. Before he pushed the button to open it, she flew over to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Of course I forgive you Richard, I always will. I understand what you are going through right now and I should have did more to stop you, but I felt so much joy that you would do whatever it took to prevent my execution that I did not think to review the plan better. Hoteshna's are rare and the laws are somewhat arcane, so I was not fully aware of the ramifications myself. I know it is not what you want, or what I want at this time, but I will not have Ph'yzzon demand your head on a pike for backing out of the Hoteshna. Like you I will fight for your life if I have to."

Nightwing took Starfire's hands in his then turned to face her still holding her hands. "Star, I know you would, you wouldn't be Starfire if you didn't. It's just a lot to deal with now and I wasn't prepared for the whole instant marriage thing."

Nightwing removed his hands from hers and to a step back, feeling a little awkward and blushing slightly. Starfire clasped her hand in front of her and looked away shyly, blushing as well.

Nightwing smiled at her, "Honestly though, had I'd have known, I still would have went through with the whole Hoteshna thing, unless you asked me not to. I couldn't stand to see you be dragged off in chains to meet you doom."

Starfire looked sadly at him, "Richard, had I known the complete ramifications I would have told you no. A forced marriage to you or anyone is not what I want, I would have preferred we only be friends and let our feelings work themselves out, but now what is done is done. I will proudly go through this with you together. Besides, it will be Nightwing I am married to, not Richard Grayson, so as Richard you are free to do as you please, if you wish of course."

Nightwing's jaw dropped, if there was one thing about Starfire he could count on was that she was full of surprises.

"Star, you're a genius! That could work out very well, you'd be married to Nightwing and be a member of 'Clan Titans,' and Dick Grayson can be a single man, unless Kori Anders decides to reunite with her old flame, but that's something we can work out later, only if you wanted too. It would be kind of weird though. Are you fine with that?"

Starfire nodded her head, "Yes, I would be fine with that and we could work things out over time. I will not hold you back as Richard, if you wish to be with someone else, and I would expect likewise from you as well."

Nightwing nodded in agreement, "Ok, that's agreeable; I remember you telling me that Tamaranean marriages were more like treaties and it was common to have many lovers even while married."

"Yes, this is true. Our marriages are not monogamous in the sense that human marriages are. They are not seen as an expression of love, but as a treaty between Houses, Clans and Nations. That is why I wished for a human wedding back when were first engaged to be married. I wanted nothing to do with the Tamaranean marriage tradition, even though Galfore insisted on an official betrothal and a treaty between Tamaran and Earth."

Nightwing nodded. "How about we play it by ear for a while and see how things end up before we decide have a more open marriage. Besides, I need the time to get over Catalina and all that happened those last few days between her and I. I still don't believe that she is dead, and I'll need to attend her funeral as Dick Grayson when that comes around. Later, when the time comes, maybe you can join me on patrols again like the old days. No rush though."

Starfire smiled, "As you say, we shall by the ear, play it for now, and make the best of what has been given us. I will tell you that the marriage ceremony will happen shortly after the reparations are agreed upon and it is considered the seal of the agreement."

Nightwings eyes got big, "We won't have to…, you know, um, consummate or anything will we?"

Starfire put her hands on her hips, narrowing her eyes at Nightwing, "Is that a bad thing? Do you not wish to consummate our marriage?"

Nightwing stepped back a step and waved his hands in front of him, "No, no. I just, um, you know, um… wasn't sure that you'd want to and it does seem a little rushed."

Starfire was enjoying his discomfort of the possibility of having sex with her. It amused her how humans could get so uncomfortable at the thought, like it might bite them if they were not careful, yet at the same time were obsessed with sex. She understood though as it would be uncomfortable for both, especially in light of things. She softened her look, smiled and shook her head.

"No, there are no special consummation rituals where we are watched to make sure we consummate the marriage or anything like that. Sex is not required to complete the marriage, so you do not have to worry about it, though I would not be opposed to a sexual union if you wished it, after the ceremony of course."

Nightwing went a little pale when she said that and he felt his knees weaken.

Starfire giggled at the sight of the mighty Nightwing terrified of the thought of sex, humans were so strange.

"I am just doing the kidding of you Richard. Do not worry, I will not throw you down and ravish you on our wedding day, you are safe."

Nightwing let out a visible sigh of relief. "Ok, enough with the kidding, my nerves are shot as it is. Matter of fact, I think I need to rest for a bit, if only to calm my nerves. I never thought that I'd be getting married before I came here now I just don't know what to think. If you don't mind, I'll take my leave so I can reset and start over. This day is just getting crazier by the moment. I need all my composure before your sister and the general arrive. Let me know if you need anything, ok."

"I will Richard."

"Good," he took on her hands in his, "We'll get through this Kori, we just have to be patient with each other."

"I understand. You need to go rest now as do I. I am presently exhausted and like you need to reset and recharge. Pleasant slorvaks Richard."

"Pleasant dreams to you too Kori," Nightwing said as he cupped her cheek in one of his hands and leaned over and kissed her lightly on the other cheek. He then turned and exited out of the room leaving Starfire standing there, her hand on the cheek he just kissed and a tear rolling out of one her emerald green eyes.

It is still not going where you think it is going, angst is coming, be ready.

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