AN: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I can't believe it's been so long and I feel so terribly that I just left you all without any notice or explanation. Without going into too much detail, I found out I was pregnant a few weeks back and while my husband and I are very excited, my pregnancy has been very difficult thus far. I've been in and out of my OBGYN's office every other day and I've just been horribly sick. I'm doing much, much better now and I finally felt like I could sit down and write for you.

I really, truly appreciate all the love and comments! I am so happy so many of you have been checking in and believe me, I will not be abandoning this story. I have so much more to share with you!

Without further adieu, please read and enjoy. If you have a moment, I'd love to hear from you, so leave a comment.

Thank you again, so very much, for your patience. And for anyone curious, I'm having a girl and she's due in March!

"Okay, go over it again."

"Alright. Kate is the oldest. She's married to Dave, the lawyer. They have six kids. In order: Brandon, Caleb, Renee, Sadie, Alice, and Jenny. Nancy is divorced, but her boyfriend Henry is coming. Nancy's kids are Allison, Anna, Anthony, and Abigail. Then there's Lizzie with two and two. Her kids are Jacob, Savannah, Rosalie, and Max. And Lizzie is married to Brian; he's also a doctor. And then Amelia. Single, no kids, so that one should be easy."

I stare at Derek and give him a few long blinks before I lay back onto the mattress and stare at the ceiling. "This is impossible."

He chuckles and sits down beside me. "All you need to remember are my sisters. And my mom. The kids, well, it really is impossible. I think you'll figure out the husbands and boyfriend quickly enough. They all seem to be glued to one another."

"Why do they have to have so many children?"

"They like kids."

For a second I go insane. I know I do because what I ask next is so not me. I'm not the kind of person to rush a relationship, especially a complicated one that has barely touched the three month mark. No, I'm not that person. But for some crazy reason, I hit the gas and ask, "Do you like kids? I mean, do you want any of your own?"

As if the idea of asking Derek about children isn't horrifying enough, I had to ask him as if I was asking if he wanted a piece of pie of his very own.

I sit up quickly. Too quickly. Quickly enough so that Derek doesn't have time to answer.

"Ignore me," I tell him, not even brave enough to look him in the eyes.

Before Derek can say anything, I stand up and walk into the bathroom. I don't shut the door behind me because honestly I think we're both going to try and forget anything just happened, but as I lean into the mirror, trying to pretend to touch up my makeup, I notice Derek leaning against the door in the corner of my eye.

I stand up straight and look at him.

"You're as white as a ghost."

"Yeah. I need sun. Let's go. We should go outside." I walk towards him and try to push past him, but Derek clearly is going to make us have this conversation.

"Why are you freaking out?"

"I'm not. I'm fine."

His eyebrow shoots up.

I sigh and look at my feet. "Don't make me say it."

Derek laughs and runs his one hand down my bare arm. "Meredith, you can ask me anything, you know that." I meet his eyes which are warm and kind. "To answer your question: yes, I want children. I don't want a million like my sisters, but one or two would be nice. And in the vein of honesty, I'm not getting any younger, so I'd want them pretty soon."

"I'm not sure if I want kids," I admit.

Derek nods. "I understand. I'm not asking to impregnate you today," he teases with a slight smile. "Our relationship is new. We don't need to decide today."

"Do you ever feel like we're moving really fast? I mean, I've never met anyone's family before and yeah, I've met them before, but this feels big."

"It is big," Derek says confidently. "And maybe it's fast, but does that make you uncomfortable?"

"No," I say just as confidently.

"Then what's the problem?"

"Nothing, I guess."

Derek flashes me a grin and holds out his hand for me to take. "Come on. Let's get this over with."

We have about a half an hour downstairs with Carolyn before the sisters and their families show up. It's nice to have some quiet time with Carolyn, especially since she genuinely seems to like me. Derek has to make a quick call, so he sneaks off. Carolyn and I sit on the back porch overlooking the ocean.

"Why general surgery?" Carolyn asks.

Everyone always assumes I chose general because of my mother and stepfather, which sure, influenced me, but I never chose general strictly because of them. "I wanted to save people and I know neuro and cardio saves lives. Obviously. But so many neurosurgeons are just looking for the next big inoperable tumor to make news and I've never been inspired by the heart. I wanted to save people with everyday injuries and ailments. I'm not sure if that makes sense."

"It does. Amelia is a neurosurgeon and she's very talented, but she doesn't talk about the day-to-day operations. She's always going on and on about the big stuff."

"Well, to be fair, I think that's all surgeons, but you're right. Neurosurgeons have this air about them. We all think we're gods, but neurosurgeons act like gods."

"God, that's so right," Carolyn says while releasing a deep breath. "I've always tried to pinpoint it, but I never could. You're so right."

I can't help but laugh. "When you spend enough time around neurosurgeons, you learn a thing or two."

"Did you ever want to do anything else? Or was it always going to be surgery?"

"I thought about being a teacher when I was really young."

"Really?" Carolyn asks.

"Yeah. I had this grand plan to have a lot of children and since my mom was never around because surgery can be unpredictable, a teacher's more predictable schedule appealed to me. I wanted to make sure I'd be around early for my kids. But as I got older, I don't know. Suddenly seeing my mom and stepdad so excited about surgery made me excited. I wanted to feel passionate about my job and I wanted to save people."

I glance over at Carolyn and she's staring out at the ocean. "Michael, the kids' father, and I weren't really all that exceptional. He was a woodworker and had a beautiful shop and I was a military nurse for a long time, but both those jobs seemed pretty standard to us."

"Nurses are undervalued," I tell her.

"Yes, they are. But what I'm trying to say is Michael and I were ordinary. Average. But we have these really overachieving, incredible children. I think some people, regardless of their parents, were just meant to be extraordinary. Even with being raised by surgeons, I'm sure you would've found your way into the operating room with a scalpel in hand. It's just who you are."

I give her a warm smile. "You're nice."

She laughs a little. "Did you expect me not to be nice?"

"No. Or maybe. I don't know. I guess I'm just surprised that it seems like you like me. Parents don't usually like me very much."

"You weren't meeting the right parents, then. Plus, you did save my son. I'm predisposed to like you."

I can tell Carolyn is teasing by the way she grins at me. "Well, I sort of had to save him. He is the President, after all."

"Yes, that's true." She pauses for a second and then asks, "How's that going? Dating the President," she clarifies. "I'd imagine it wouldn't be the easiest position for you to be in."

For some reason, I feel like I can be more honest with Carolyn than I am with myself. "It's wonderful because Derek is wonderful, but it's also really uncomfortable. I'm not used to being driven around and living in a home that's not my home. And I don't want to whine or complain because people would kill to be loved by that man and live this life, but it's a hard adjustment." I take a breath and notice Carolyn's face looks a little pinched, like I'm offending her. "And I'm making you mad. I'm sorry. I love Derek and all of this is worth it and—"

"Meredith," she interrupts with a laugh. "Calm down. I was just listening. And I was considering how much harder it probably is than you'd ever admit."

I take a deep breath. "Yeah."

"Well, you're doing beautifully. You're a smart, strong woman. The first few months are probably going to be difficult, but you'll both find your stride eventually."

Derek steps out onto the deck looking as calm and collected as ever. He's wearing a pair of soft jeans and a blue t-shirt and he looks more relaxed than I've ever seen him look. He unhooks a pair of sunglasses from the front of his shirt and slips them on and even behind the dark lenses, I can tell he's looking at me. I can tell from the smile on his lips and the way his shoulders roll back, as if just looking at me gives him a reason to stand taller.

I don't notice Carolyn glancing back at Derek, but then she says quietly, mostly just for me, "I guess you've already found that stride," she says with a laugh and stands. She walks over to Derek and whispers something into his ear before kissing his one cheek. "I'm going to grab a drink. Can I get either of you something?"

"No, thank you," Derek says.

"No thanks."

"You two should get a room," Carolyn says with a laugh before disappearing into the house.

My cheeks turn red. "Stop looking at me."

Derek chuckles. "I'm not looking at you."

"You. You're watching me."

"You're beautiful."

I look up at him as he stands right in front of me. "Fine, watch me. But you better keep your hands to yourself today. There'll be children around."

Derek offers me his hand and he helps me stand. "There aren't children here yet." He leans down to kiss my neck.

I push him away, but if I'm being honest, I don't really try to push him far. "Your mother is right on the other side of this glass wall."

Derek kisses my mouth. "So? We can go upstairs."

"No."

He kisses right beside my lips, just catching the corner of my mouth.

"Derek…" I say with a sigh that should sound exasperated, but it comes out almost like a moan.

"Meredith…" he says in the same tone.

Just as I'm about to give in, I hear brakes screeching from the driveway. And then car doors open and shut. And then lots and lots of voices. Lots of little voices. I push Derek away and he goes willingly. He slides his hands into his pockets and still gives me that look. Our look. But he stays five feet away.

"Let the games begin."

\\\

I am overwhelmed almost instantly. Not by the children though, which is what I had expected. I'm not really a kid person, so I'd imagined they'd all swarm me and ask questions, but they seem to swarm each other instead. The kids range from teenagers all the way down to toddlers and they all pair or group up pretty quickly. Derek hugs them all, even an older teenage boy who looks like he'd like to be far away, and Derek introduces me, but the kids say hi and pass by quickly.

The sisters are the ones to overwhelm me.

It starts with Lizzie, who Derek tells me has always been the pushy one. She wraps me in a hug, which is strange enough, and then begins to talk my ear off. She introduces me to Brian and points out her kids, but I can barely pick an individual out from the mass of screaming kids running around the yard. "How's everything going?" she asks. "I saw a picture of you and Derek in the paper the other day. You have to visit Connecticut. You can leave Derek behind if he's too busy, but you have to come. Especially in the Fall. We have this really amazing—"

"Lizzie," Derek says in a tone that says: stop talking.

She gives him a smile. "You can come, too, you know."

"I was in Connecticut last year," he says and hugs her.

"You were on the campaign trail. That doesn't count."

"Yes it does," Derek says and gives me a smile over his sister's shoulder.

Another pair of arms encircles me and it's Kate. "You look thinner. Are you doing okay?" she asks.

"Kate," Derek sighs.

She pulls away and keeps staring at me like I'm a patient in her office. Like I'm about to spill all my secrets. Kate waves her hand in the air as if she's dismissing his tone. "I'm not prying, I'm just concerned."

"Well don't be. Meredith is fine."

"Yes, I'm fine," I say quickly. "How are you?" I ask, trying to deflect the attention.

"Very well, thank you."

Next is Nancy, who doesn't seem thrilled about hugging me, but she does any way. I can't tell why she doesn't seem to like me, but when I mentioned it to Derek, he said she doesn't seem to like anyone. "This is Henry, my boyfriend, and before you ask, I am divorced."

"I wasn't going to ask," I say.

"Nancy, come on," Derek says with yet a different tone. I'm quickly realizing he has these tones for each of his sisters. I never heard them in the hospital because he was barely himself and I didn't hear them at lunch that one day because it seems like everyone was on their best behavior. Today, everyone is just letting themselves fly.

"Now calm down, my brother. I'm just joking." She hugs him.

"Well, you're not a funny person, then."

Nancy play-slaps his shoulder.

And last, but not least, is Amelia. She looks different from the last time I saw her. Sick, maybe. She does hug me, still, and she smells of cigarettes. "Welcome to Derek's palace."

As I pull back, I give her a smile. "I'd say the White House is really is palace. This place is more like his vacation home."

Amelia doesn't smile and when I glance at Derek, he looks angry. "Ah yes, the good son." She goes to hug Derek and he shakes his head.

"Amy, come here." He takes her by the arm and walks inside with her. The whole thing happens very quickly. Amelia doesn't resist, but goes with Derek. Although she doesn't look necessarily happy.

Kate must see the confusion on my face. She leans in and says quietly. "Amelia has some…issues." It seems like Kate doesn't want to give too much away, so she pauses for a long moment and then finally admits. "She's a junkie."

"What?"

"She and Derek are the closest, so when she's fallen off the wagon, he tends to take it…poorly."

"But, she always seems fine when I see her."

Kate nods. "Well, she must've fallen off the wagon. Again."

I can see Derek and Amelia in the living room through the glass doors and it seems like they're shouting at one another. Carolyn in in there, too, and she's mediating, but it doesn't seem to be working. I feel badly about spying, so I turn my attention back to the other sisters. I give Lizzie a smile, since she's the first to lock eyes with me, and I ask, "What can I get you all to drink?"

\\\

Amelia walks out of the house not long after I've gotten drinks from the cooler for the rest of the family. She goes right down to where the kids are playing in the yard and begins to run around with them, as if nothing has happened at all. Carolyn comes out a few minutes later, squeezes my upper arm as she walks past, and heads down towards Amelia and the kids. Not long later, a whole group of them run onto the beach.

I find Derek inside on the phone. I plan to turn back around and head outside, but he nods at me, crosses the room, and loops his arm around my back. He kisses the top of my head.

"No, the video must remain private," he says into the phone.

I look up at him and he doesn't seem angry. He doesn't seem anything. "Well can't you stop this? We can't just have this video release."

I run my palm up and down his back. "Alan, we're the government. We have the power to stop this. So stop it." Alan, Derek's Chief of Staff, is speaking on the other end of the line. Derek cuts him off, "I don't care. We can't just have a beheading video floating around Facebook and YouTube. Get in contact with the CIA. We need to find the leak. Call me back when you do."

Derek ends the call and sighs.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

He forces a smile. "Yes."

"You don't have to be, you know. That conversation sounded…intense."

Derek lets his guard down. "My job never stops."

I think about not bringing it up, but I want us to have a good day, so I ask, "And Amelia?" I figure if he actually talks about what might be bothering him, then he might feel better.

"Did one of my sisters say anything to you?"

"Maybe," I say sheepishly.

Derek shakes his head. "Let me guess: Kathleen?"

"I won't reveal my sources."

"Yeah, well no one seems to be revealing their sources today."

I believe his phone call has something to do with that comment. "We don't have to talk about it. I just thought, maybe you'd want to."

Derek quiet for a long moment. His hand holds firmly to my hip, not too tight, but tight enough to really feel the pressure. It's almost as if he's using me to stay grounded, which is a new feeling for me. I've never been the one to keep someone else grounded.

"She's sober, or so she says."

I'm not sure if I believe it, based on how she looks, but I don't mention that. I do ask, however, "Do you believe her?"

"I do. I mean, she looks like a mess and she reeks of cigarettes, but that's actually very on brand for newly sober Amelia. She doesn't sleep much when she's coming down and she smokes a lot as a replacement. By the month mark, she should be back to normal. Although for Amelia, I'm not really sure what normal is." He says the last part more for himself, I think.

"How long as this been going on?"

"Since she was a kid. She got sober in college and was clean through med school and her internship, but the last few years have been tough and me getting shot didn't help her sobriety."

"It's not your fault."

"I know." He nods. "But she's struggling."

"So be there for her. Don't yell at her when she's struggling," I give him a look. "Be supportive."

"You make it sound easy," he says.

I can tell it's not easy for him; if it were, Derek would be giving her a break, but since he hasn't I know there's more history then he's letting me in on. "It's not easy, but it's what she needs."

Derek cups my cheek and then leans down to kiss me softly. "I love you."

Before I can say anything he's heading outside and down the long steps towards the beach. I walk back out onto the porch and his other sisters and their significant others watch, just as I do, as Derek heads out to the water where his nieces and nephews play and where his mother and sister watch on. "Come on," Lizzie says to her husband and Nancy, her boyfriend, Kate, and her husband all follow.

"Come on, Meredith," Nancy says over her shoulder and I feel completely accepted.

"I'll be right there," I call after them, wanting just another minute to watch Derek.

He throws his arm around Amelia's shoulder and she leans into him. She closes her eyes and they embrace. For a long time, they just stand in the surf. I can tell Derek's saying something to her and Amelia nods and then brushes away tears.

I find myself forgetting sometimes that Derek isn't just my boyfriend and the President of the United States. He's a brother to his sisters, a son to his mother, and the last Shepherd man in his household. Before I knew Derek, he had this whole life, a life I'm just now seeing. Seeing him with his mom and the rest of the family makes me picture a future with him. Derek rushes towards one of his nieces and throws her into the air, making her scream with glee. After our earlier conversation, I know Derek is the one I want to build a family with.

To myself, I say, "I'm going to marry him."

Thank you, so, so much to the following people who left me the kindest messages: Hasi2012 x2, Pat x2, DrMerder, Hitam1 x2, Guest x6, ScarvesAndCoffee579, gabs, ForeverMerDer x2, Carla, Hope, Beth00011, Patsy x2, We'reNotGonnaPayRent, Gretchen, Jackie, nltpurpolia, Awesome Allison, Harryfan626, two harts, unnamedconspirator, and greyhouses.