Chapter Twenty-Five
Molly was sitting down to a cup of tea. With Ruth out shopping for groceries, she finally had some time to herself. It wasn't that she didn't like Ruth. The woman was growing on her, but there were times when Molly would need a few hours to herself. During those times, she'd plan out her days or think about her own family. She was thinking about her strained relationship with her children when the doorbell chimes interrupted her train of thought.
"Mrs. Brown, there are two young people at the door to see you," Sylvia, a new maid that Molly had hired just last week entered the room, looking rather nervous. She was well aware of her employer's alone time and didn't appreciate being disturbed, but the young man had assured her that Molly wouldn't mind.
"Did you at least get their names?" Molly asked, annoyed at the disturbance. She got up from her chair, wondering who the visitors were. Surely they weren't her own children. They wouldn't just drop in like this. At least not these days anyway.
"A Jack and Rose Dawson, Mrs. They said that you wouldn't mind seeing them," Sylvia explained, nervously wringing her hands. She sure did hope that the young man was right. She needed this job. She couldn't afford to get fired.
"Jack and Rose are here?! Why didn't you say it was them, girl?!" Molly bounced up and down in excitement. She was always pleased to see those two, no doubt about it! "Well don't just stand there like a statue! Invite them in!"
Jack and Rose. She hadn't forgotten about those two at all, and not just because Rose's mother was living with her, but also because of the connection she felt with Jack. She loved the boy as if he was her own. She didn't know why, but he brought out the maternal side in her and made her think of her own boy.
"Hi Molly," Both Jack and Rose greeted as Sylvia led them into the sitting room, where she was waiting.
"Why aren't you two a sight for sore eyes!" Molly greeted, approaching the two with opened arms, ready for a big hug. "Sylvia, go get some tea for our guests."
"Oh Molly, no. We're fine. We've drank so much tea and coffee on the way here, we can't possibly drink anymore," Rose giggled, returning the tight hug that Molly gave her.
Molly stepped away from Rose, giving her a good look. "Rose, darlin', you are a sight for sore eyes and I see that Jack has been taking very good care of you and the baby."
"I try my best," Jack chuckled as he received a hug of his own from the eccentric socialite.
"And Jack Dawson. You get more and more good-looking every time I set eyes on ya. It's a good thing that I am an old woman or I'd have to steal you away from Rose there," Molly winked. She was teasing of course. Jack was a son to her and a friend. She had no romantic inclinations at all.
"There is no danger of that," Rose laughed good-naturely, knowing that Molly was only teasing.
"Oh I don't know, Rose. I always kind of leaned towards older women," Jack joked, wincing when he received a playful punch in the arm from his wife.
Molly laughed, enjoying the playfulness between the young couple, but there was something wrong as well. She could tell. "So what brings you two kids to these parts? Is this about reconciling with Ruth, Rose?"
The amusement in their smiles suddenly turned grim, warning Molly that this was indeed serious. "What's the matter? Why the serious faces?"
Jack sighed, knowing that he would have to make the first step in explaining. "We're here to see a doctor..."
"A doctor? Is it the baby? Is there something wrong?" Molly frowned, preparing herself for the bad news. It'd be a damn shame if something happened to the baby that had brought her favorite couple back together. It'd break her heart.
"Oh no, Molly. It's not the baby, it's fine. It's...it's Rose," Jack sighed, not sure how to explain.
Rose sniffed suddenly and looked down at the floor. Her voice was almost a whisper. "It's me. I'm going crazy."
Jack wrapped an arm around her shoulder, pulling her close to him. "No, Rose. You're not going crazy, you're just having some issues getting over the sinking and just need a little extra help. That's all."
Molly frowned, even more confused now. "Wait a minute you two. I'm not following ya. Rose, darlin', what do you mean that you're going crazy?"
Rose didn't answer. She couldn't. The shame she felt wouldn't let her. She just moved closer to Jack, as if being close to him would protect her from anything in the outside world that could possibly harm her.
Molly turned to Jack for answers once it was obvious that Rose was really in no condition to share information. "Do you want to tell me what's going on?"
Jack nodded, meeting Molly's gaze straight on. "We are going to see a shrink here in town. He was recommended by Rose's doctor back home."
"A shrink? Why are you taking her to see a shrink for?" Molly asked, confused. Rose had seemed perfectly fine when she had seen her last and she looked...well a little worse for wear, but not near needing to go to a loony bin or anything. "She looks pretty sane to me."
"She is sane. She just needs a little help dealing with the sinking. We both do, if I'm being honest here. Maybe this doctor can help. It's worth a try," Jack explained, not revealing everything, because he didn't really know all of it. Rose refused to tell him what she had seen at the lake, why she kept apologizing to him the way she had. It was still a mystery to him.
"I'm a headcase, Molly. That's why I'm going to this Doctor Alman. He will probably put me in an asylum somewhere," Rose began to sob, her fears coming to the surface.
"No Rose," Jack tried to soothe away her fears. "He won't do that. He's going to help you."
"Jack's right, darlin'. I know Doctor Alman personally. He's a good man. The only thing he'll do is listen to you talk about what's happening to you and give you some advice. Maybe even some medicine to help calm your nerves. You'll be fine," Molly placed a comforting hand on Rose's shoulder. Her voice was reassuring. "It's going to be fine."
"See Rose. Molly knows him. She wouldn't let you go to someone that she didn't like or trust now would she?" Jack pulled Rose away from him a little in order to look into her eyes. His gaze was firm and full of confidence and love.
Rose sniffed and shook her head. Jack was right. If Molly liked the doctor, he must be okay. She tried to smile for Jack, knowing that he must be sick of her tears by now. "I'm just so scared of what he might say."
"Don't worry about what he's going to say Rose darlin'. The only thing serious that he'll tell ya is that you need plenty of rest. That's about it," Molly comforted her, her heart breaking at the fear she saw in Rose's eyes. "Besides, you'll have Jack there right beside ya and if you like, I'll go along with you too. I have been through Titanic right along with you two."
"Really?" Jack couldn't help but be hopeful. "I think that would help. At least make her more comfortable."
"Why certainly. When is the appointment?"
"This afternoon at three, if that's okay?"
"That's perfectly fine. In the mean time, you two kids need to rest. I'll have Sylvia fix up your rooms while I fix you a snack. You two look starved," Molly chuckled, leading Jack and Rose into the kitchen.
That was when Ruth returned with two maids trailing behind her, their arms full of groceries.
"Now make sure that you put the flour in the cabinet this time. The last time, you had left it on the counter and it fell on the floor, getting over everything," she lectured, her voice stern and annoyed.
"Yes Mrs," one of the maids looked at the other almost accusingly.
Ruth was about to give another command when she finally noticed Jack and Rose, who were quietly watching her entrance.
"Rose? What are you doing here? I mean, I'm glad to see you…," Ruth stammered, taken off guard. The woman hadn't been expecting contact with her daughter this soon. She thought it'd be a good month or two.
"Hello mother," Rose stood up and greeted her mother with a voice void of emotion. "We had just come by to say hello to Molly and run a few errands. We'll probably be here until morning before heading back home."
"So you are not here to see me?" Ruth's voice was full of hurt. She had hoped that Rose had a break through, that finally she was there to forgive her for the past and finally they could start anew. It hurt to know that wasn't the case for this visit.
Rose looked away, feeling guilty. She hadn't meant to get her mother's hopes up. Really, she didn't even know how she felt about her mother at the moment. "I'm sorry, mother. I know that you are disappointed."
"But that doesn't mean that you two can't talk," Molly stepped in. In her opinion, the two women should take advantage of this opportunity. "In fact, this may be just the time for you two to have a heart to heart talk. Come Jack, let's make sure that my girls are putting away the groceries correctly this time. You will not believe the mess they made last time..."
"Sure Molly," Jack sighed, understanding Molly's reasoning, even though he wasn't sure that he agreed with it, especially now with Rose having issues other than the ones she already had with her mother, but he followed her into the kitchen anyway, leaving Rose alone with her mother.
For a few minutes, Rose and Ruth just stood there, looking at one another. Neither one knew where to start, or even if this was indeed the right time. But finally, Ruth made the first move.
"Rose..."
It was then that Rose shook her head, her mind already feeling heavy with everything else. "Not now, mother. I can't talk about this right now. I can't take your guilt trips," Rose turned her back, not wanting to see the hurt on her mother's face.
"Guilt trips? Rose, I have no intention of laying a guilt trip on you. That's the last thing that I want. I just want us to start a normal mother and daughter relationship with you. Be the mother I should have been from the start. Is that so wrong?"
Rose kept he back turned to Ruth. She didn't answer the question, she just hoped that Jack and Molly would return soon. She did not come here for this. She simply wasn't ready.
But that didn't stop Ruth from talking, hoping to somehow get Rose to see that she was sincere. "I have come to accept Jack, Rose. He's a fine young man and I am glad that you had found each other. I was wrong for trying to keep you two apart on Titanic. I was so wrong about so many things, but I was afraid and desperate at the time. I guess that you already know that."
Rose shook her head, tears swelling up into her eyes at the mention of Titanic. She couldn't do this. She just couldn't and they couldn't make her! Not Molly and definitely not her mother! "Mother stop it! Stop it right now! I don't want to talk about Titanic with you! Not now, not ever!"
"Rose…," Ruth frowned, confused by the outburst, not knowing what she had just said to make Rose so angry.
"Just leave me alone!" Rose cried, running past her mother and into Jack's arms, who was coming out of the kitchen along with Molly when they both heard Rose shouting.
"What is going on in here?" Molly questioned, walking over and placing a supportive hand on Ruth's shoulder.
"I don't know. I don't even know what I had said. I was apologizing for my behavior on Titanic and she began to yell at me," Ruth stammered, pressing a hand to her throat.
"I'll take her outside for some air," Jack lead Rose out the door, giving Molly a look that said that it was okay to tell Ruth what was going on with Rose. He gave a little nod and mouthed, "It's okay."
Molly just nodded in understanding and led Ruth over to a chair in the sitting room. She gave Ruth's hand a squeeze. "We need to talk about Rose, Ruth. Jack said it was okay to tell you what's been happening and why they're really here."
Ruth frowned, not liking the sound of what Molly was saying. "What do you mean? What is going on? What's wrong with my daughter?"
Molly sighed and shook her head, feeling sad for Rose, Jack...for everyone that was involved with the sinking. "She's having a hard time getting over what she had gone through on Titanic."
"What do you mean? We went through it too, but we're perfectly alright."
Molly sighed and resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Indeed, Ruth had come a long way, but at times she was still so stuck on herself that she didn't see the big picture at all and that can be a hindrance where Rose was concerned. "It was worse for Rose and Jack. All that you and I did was get in a lifeboat and watch the ship disappear into the ocean. It was quite different for Jack and Rose. They were right in the heart of the sinking ship. They were on it when it went under and after that they were in the middle of a screaming mass of dying people. They had almost died themselves. Something like that...you just don't get over. It stays with you. It's sticking with Rose like glue."
"I don't understand..."
"Jack had brought Rose here to see a head doctor. To help her finally heal from Titanic and put it in the past. Now I don't know the details of what had happened, but I do know that it was serious enough for her to go talk to this doctor," Molly explained. "I want you to go easy on her, Ruth. Whatever you do, no talking about that ship. Do you hear?"
Ruth quickly nodded. She'd do anything for Rose. Her poor daughter, haunted by such a horrible, senseless tragedy. It broke her heart.
"Is everything okay here?" Jack asked, escorting Rose back into the room. Ruth couldn't help notice that Rose's eyes were red from crying and how tightly she seemed to cling to Jack.
Ruth immediately went over to Rose and gave her a gentle hug. "I am so sorry, Rose. Don't you worry darling, everything will be alright."
To Ruth's surprise, Rose returned the hug. The older woman tried not to read too much into it, but she couldn't help but hope that it as a sign of Rose's forgiveness.
"Jack, why don't you take Rose on up to bed? It's the third room on the left. I'll have Sylvia bring you up some hot tea and sandwiches," Molly smiled, giving the directions to her guest room.
"Sure," Jack nodded, taking Rose's hand and leading her up the stairs.
"You did good, Ruth," Molly smiled, proud of her guest. Maybe there was hope for the Dewitt Bukater women after all. "Just remember to keep taking it slow. Don't push."
…
Up in the guest room, Rose and Jack laid in each others arms. Rose's head was cushioned against his chest as he stroked her hair and sang their song to her, soothing her frazzled nerves. "Come Josephine in my flying machine, and it's up she goes. Up she goes..."
Rose sighed as she felt her eyes become heavy. Sleep was going to be upon her soon and she wasn't sure that she wanted to stop it. "I love you Jack..."
He smiled and kissed her forehead, his heart swelling with the love he had for her. "I love you too, Rosebud. Don't you worry about a think. I'll take care of you. I always will."
"I just don't understand why this is happening. Why I can't just let it go..."
"I don't know, sweetie. But that's why we're going to see this doctor so he can help you let it go and go on with your life," Jack held her tighter, wanting her to know that he was here for her. That she wasn't alone, he was going through it too. "But Rose, one thing I don't get. What happened out there on the lake? What did you see that had scared you so much?"
At first Rose didn't answer. What could she say? It sounded so...crazy. She didn't want Jack to think that she had lost her mind. But the memory of the image wouldn't leave her. She began to sob again and pressed her face against his chest as she again saw Jack's dead body floating in the icy waters of the North Atlantic. She knew that it had been an hallucination, but it had seemed so real to her, even though she knew that Jack was alive. Even when she could feel his strong arms surrounding her.
"I can't Jack. It hurts so much to even think about it..."
"Shhh, it's okay. You don't have to tell me right now. We'll save it for when we're in the doctor's office. He'll be able to help you more there anyway," Jack sighed, stroking her hair. He wanted more than anything for the sadness of Titanic to leave them and never return, but he knew that it would take more than his love and support to make that happen. Rose need professional help and if he was really being honest, so did he. He still thought about Tommy and Fabrizio's deaths more than it was healthy to. He needed to get himself sorted as well. "It'll be okay, Rose. Just get some sleep. All three of us need it."
Rose did just that as she breathed in his scent and kept the feel of his arms in her memory, hoping to take them into the dreams that haunt her when she dared to close her eyes.
...
They were in the Renaulttown car. They had just gotten through making love for the first time. Rose stroked his soft hair, the softest hair that a man should ever have, and stared into the beautiful eyes that she wanted to get lost in. He was so beautiful and she wanted him to be hers. Her mother and Cal were fools if they thought that she was going to give this up for anything that they had to offer. Her beautiful, cold artist...cold? Why was he so cold, freezing really? Sure, it wasn't at all warm in the cargo hold, but their lovemaking had warmed her right up. In fact, she was burning hot. Why wasn't he?
"Jack?" She frowned, furrowing her brow. "You're so cold..."
"Aren't you?" Jack asked, his freezing breath lightly touching her cheek, causing her to shiver.
Rose shook her head. That was when she noticed his hair. A moment ago, it was damp with sweat, but now it was stiff with ice forming in it's strands. "Jack?"
Suddenly, they're not in the cargo hold anymore. They were in the freezing waters of the North Atlantic. Titanic was gone, having sunk into the ocean.
Frightened, Rose clung to Jack, who was shivering violently by this time.
"Rose...I'm so cold..."
"It's okay, Jack. We'll get out of here. I'll save you," She began to shiver herself, looking for some way, any way to keep him warm. "Jack..."
He didn't answer. She couldn't even feel him breathing anymore. "Jack?"
She looked at him and screamed at what she saw. He was now a frozen statue, staring at her with cold, accusing eyes, asking why she couldn't stop this from happening to him. Why she couldn't save him...
"Jack!"
"Jack!" Rose sat up right in bed, her eyes wide open, yet seeing nothing but the ocean that was in her mind.
Woken up by her hysterically screaming his name, Jack sat up and gently shook her awake, calling her name. "Rose! Rose wake up! You're dreaming, Rose, wake up!"
Finally her vision cleared and she sobbed as she found herself back in Molly's guest room with a concerned Jack gripping her shoulders, trying to get her awake. "Jack? Oh god Jack...it was awful..."
"I know sweetie, I know," He pulled her into a warm hug, holding her tight. "It was only a nightmare, sweetness. It wasn't real. You're safe, I promise."
"It was so awful," Rose cried, burying her face against his shoulder. "You were so cold..."
"Rose!" Ruth bounded into the room. Rose's screams had caught her attention and she had come running, certain that she was being murdered. She stared at Jack with wide eyes. "I heard her screaming. What happened?"
"She had a nightmare," Jack simply answered, trying to calm Rose as best as he could.
Ruth quietly walked over to the bed and placed a warm hand on her daughter's head. "Was it about...?"
Jack simply nodded his head.
"Oh my poor dear. It's okay, now Rose. You're safe," Ruth soothingly rubbed her daughter's back. "We won't let anything happen to you."
Rose gave a dry laugh. "I'm always safe. It's Jack who's...," Rose's voice choked off as tears overtook her again. She hadn't meant to let out what her dreams were about. She had never wanted Jack to know that she dreamed that he had died on Titanic. It was bad enough that she had to deal with it.
"What Rose? What happens in your dreams?" Jack asked, squarely looking into her tear-filled eyes, needing to know.
She simply shook her head and reburied her face against his chest. She couldn't tell him. Telling him somehow made it real and she did not want that. It was bad enough that he probably thought her crazy.
"Rose, darlin' it's time for your appointment," Molly cheerfully announced, appearing in the bedroom doorway. "The car's waiting outside now."
"Oh no...Jack, I don't think that I can do this. Not now," Rose sobbed, clinging to him.
"Hey, I'll be right there beside you, Rosie. I promise. I won't leave your side," Jack reassured her, tucking a red curl behind her ear.
"Promise?"
"Of course I promise," Jack smiled with laughing blue eyes, leaning down to give her a quick kiss. "And I always keep my promises. You know that."
"Do you want me to come with you too?" Ruth cautiously asked, not wanting to push her presence on Rose, yet wanting to her daughter to know that she was there if she needed her.
"Why don't you stay here Ruth? Keep the home fires burning. We should be back in an hour or two," Molly interjected, seeing the shock Rose's eyes at her mother's suggestion. Somehow she knew that Rose wouldn't want Ruth there, but didn't know how to say no.
Ruth just nodded, trying not to be jealous of Molly, who was going for moral support. Of course, she couldn't help it. After all, Rose was her daughter, not Molly's. It should be Ruth by Rose's side at this difficult time. But she had herself to blame. Her past behavior had relegated her to the sidelines of her daughter's life.
Pushing the jealousy away, Ruth followed them downstairs and watched them as they got into the car and disappeared down the driveway. Worry over Rose and her welfare swelled up into Rose's chest. She sure did hope that this doctor could help her daughter get past this. She wanted a normal life for Rose so much. She would do anything to make it happen.