LET US PARTY ON!
Also, I recieved word that some people don't know what song I was alluding to last chapter. If you can, youtube 'Batman, Maybe' and listen to the song. It's a Call Me Maybe parody.
There was a scream from the kitchen.
"What is that! Go- find your dearly beloved spiderwoman and get her to deal with your half dressed bum!" Tony yelled, and I could imagine him waving his arms around like a moron as Bruce sat at the table calmly with a cup of coffee and the paper, pretending nothing different was happening. I sighed, and rolled onto my side in my room. Clint was still playing 'Batman, Maybe' while he slept. I loved that song, but hated it at the same time.
"Tony, Spiderwoman is a real superhero. Don't you read comics?" I heard Steve ask. He had told me he only read those comics because they are so different now than when he was young. Being in SHIELD has gotten him many comic books, because they use them raise funds for projects.
Later that day, we had another group work out session. I finally understood why Tony was so upset with Clint. He had decided that today was the greatest day to walk around in nothing but his My Little Pony boxers. We had thought about holding an intervention for him, because this obsession of his had gotten out of hand. For a bit I thought I was a bit of a hypocrite, with a storage unit to hold all my Batman crap, but his ponies were all over the house. This needed to stop, but no one had the heart to do it.
I was convinced this was a way to get attention, and ignored it. This was old news to me. Everyone else was freaking out as if they had never seen what a man looked like. Maybe today was international run around half naked day. Whatever it was, I couldn't be bothered to ask.
Just before supper, when I reported that I had found Clint asleep on the staircase, Steve held a meeting without him. Basically, he wanted Clint to get dressed but wanted to avoid the awkward situation that would make if he had told him. Instead they forced me to talk to him. The entire time they were listing reasons why I should have to do the task, I was thinking of what Coulson had told me on my first day working at SHIELD. He had told me not to talk to the crazy naked guy. At first I had wondered why, but now I understood what he meant.
Thor and Steve had started making supper, by locating the phone and the take out menu, when I decided I needed to act. Out on the staircase, Clint was lying on his back, head going downhill. It looked incredibly uncomfortable.
"Honey, time to wake up." I said, in a sugary voice. Crouching down, I tapped his face repeatedly until he flinched.
"Hey Barton! Get your sorry carcass off the steps." I said a bit louder, stood up, and kicked him in the side. That got him to move.
"Hm-what?" He asked, I think. He seemed a bit dazed.
"Darling, you need to wear clothing. It's important. Because I don't like other people ogling you, and the other's are a bit weirded out."
"But I don't want to." Clint pouted, sitting up. Just as he did that, he slipped down the steps. The floor directly below us though was a busy one, where Pepper and her specially hired minions worked on important things. I'm sure Pepper had explained it to us at one point, but I probably didn't listen.
"Because if you don't wear clothing you embrass yourself with civilians." I said as people came pouring out of their offices to find out what the commotion was.
Thor had accidentally ordered the entire take out menu, and so we all ate as much as we could without feeling horrible about ourselves. Clint had gotten dressed, and now knew the importance of clothing. It was all happy, and we pretended to be a perfect family, instead of the mismatched set of socks we were.