Homecoming and Prank Wars

Chapter 25

"Engaged!" Obito threw an arm around Kidoumaru, unintentionally scratching at him with the bolts holding said arm together, "Sakura is a pretty girl! Obito is very happy for you!"

Kidoumaru smiled, "I was wondering, Sempai, I know it will be a while before the wedding, but I wanted to know, would you be one of my groomsmen?"

Obito smiled, "Yes! Obito would be happy to be a groomsman!"

Kakashi looked up from his book, "Sakura? I thought you only had eyes for Chouji?" Kidoumaru flipped him six birds as Kakashi laughed, "He'll be heart-broken!"

"That was an accident, you perverted prick!"

Kakashi shook his head, "And I thought you had better manners than that!"

Kidoumaru grinned, "You're thinking of Jirobou." He turned back to Obito, "You've helped me a lot since I came back. I really owe you, Sempai, you've been really kind."

Obito ruffled his hair, "And you helped Obito come home. Obito owes you."

...

"Engaged?!" Tsunade shook her head at Sakura, "He's a fifteen-year old former enemy who's been here less than a year and he's already proposed?"

Nawaki grinned, "Way to go, Kidoumaru!"

"This from a kid who's barely out of diapers. You've been spending too much time with that pervert Konohamaru!" Tsunade scoffed, then motioned Sakura closer, "Are you sure about this? I trust him, I like him, but he's just so . . . Young . . ."

Sakura nodded, "I know, that's why we're waiting."

"He's quite the charmer. I just want to make sure you two know exactly what you're doing."

"You're jealous, aren't you, sis? Chasing a kid fifty years younger than you!"

Tsunade shook her fist at Nawaki, "If you want to see the next fifty seconds, you'll get out of here!"

Nawaki fled, laughing. "Nawaki's a cute kid."

Sakura laughed. "Yeah, just don't get any ideas, Cradle Robber!"

Sakura huffed, "You're calling me a 'Cradle Robber'?! I've seen you staring at Kidoumaru's butt! He's fifteen, you're sixty-something! All you Sannin are perverts!"

Tsunade turned bright red, "You . . . That was . . . That wasn't what it looked like!" She sighed and reached for a bottle of sake, "Still, he is a very handsome boy . . ."

"Back off! He's mine!"

...

Kin knocked loudly on the door of Zaku's room, "Zaku!"

"Don't come in, I'm naked!"

Kin grinned and rushed into the room. Zaku was sitting on his bed, fully dressed, reading. He pointed an accusing finger at Kin, "HA! I knew it! You do want to see me naked!" He grinned, "Not that I blame you . . ." He touched a finger to his chest and made a hissing sound.

Kin laughed, "No fair, false advertising!" She threw him a piece of paper, "Guess what? Kidoumaru just proposed to Sakura."

Zaku's eyes widened, "Sakura! The pink-haired girl! Oh crap! And I tried to kill her! He's gonna' kill my #! For sure now!"

Kin smiled, "Don't worry, I'll protect you. Besides, if he was still angry about that, he'd have skinned your hide months ago . . ."

Zaku lay back onto the bed, "Yeah, I guess so. And she doesn't seem to be angry with me. I guess no woman can resist me!"

"Hmph! No woman can help feeling sorry for such a pathetic little Windbag!"

"Hey!" Zaku glanced over the letter, "Oh. They're gonna' wait until he's older . . . His birthday's coming up on the 14th, isn't it?"

Kin nodded, "Yeah."

Zaku sat up and stretched, then pulled off his shirt.

"Trying to make me laugh?" Kin asked.

"You know you like it . . ." Zaku smirked. He stood up and wrapped his arms around her, "You can't resist me either . . ."

"I guess I just have a weakness for idiots . . ."

"Yeah . . . Wait! I'm not an idiot!"

Kin kissed him on the forehead, "No, but I like you anyway . . ."

"You're both too young for this!" Eiji stuck his head in the door.

"Yeah, yeah, Granny . . ." Zaku turned, "Don't get your panties in a bunch."

Eiji shook his head, "Just keep yours on!"

"Hey! I saved the world! Don't I deserve a little fun?!" Zaku shook his fist in mock anger as Eiji walked away.

...

The Kurokage of Otogakure, or the Land of Rice Patties, as it was now known once again, looked in disbelief over the records of the recent deeds of Orochimaru's resurrected former subordinates, particularly one Abumi Zaku. True, he knew the boy was both powerful and dangerous, he'd seen the bloody vengeance he'd wrecked upon his home village, but to kill a 'god' . . .

"It would appear we would run into a great deal of difficulty trying to bring any of these kids to trial," He said softly, "And it probably wouldn't be very just to have the Abumi boy punished for his past crimes after he's already died once and defeated a being who intended to slaughter most of humanity."

An adviser nodded, "And the Oto-Five have become very . . . Popular in Konohagakure, especially Kidoumaru. If we attempted to claim any of them, it could be diplomatic suicide. We don't need another war. It would probably be wise to pardon the lot of them."

"Many of the people are still seeking vengeance for the suffering inflicted by Orochimaru and his servants," The Kurokage mused, "Some of these are small-fry, like the Tsuchi girl, they probably wouldn't even be noticed here, but others, like the Kaguya, are well known and widely feared and hated. Still," He folded his hands under his chin, "Pardons might be seen as a bridge to peace, offering forgiveness to our former tyrant's followers as a gesture of . . ." He struggled for the words.

"The benevolence of your new leadership?" The adviser offered. "Yes, so many people here were pressed into service by that demon, we need to bring them back into society, or risk a civil war between those who support us and those embittered former followers of the Snake." He sighed, "But we would have to be cautious not to bring any rabble rousers or Oto loyalists into the fold, we can't afford to be too generous. And it would be wise, if we are to pardon the Five, to do so quietly and give them a condition that they not return, for all of our sakes."

...

Rin laid a hand on Obito's shoulder, "Obito, can we talk?"

"Sure!" Obito grinned.

Rin led him into the empty kitchen of his home, and they sat at the table, "Obito," She took his hand, "How do you feel about . . . Our relationship?"

"It's nice." She sighed, "I was just . . . You know, you . . . You haven't . . ."

Obito nodded, "Obito hasn't changed. Not up here," He tapped his head, "Obito knows. That . . . Bothers you?"

"It just . . . I do love you, I just feel, it's hard to explain. It's like I'm older than you, and I feel like, like I'm taking advantage of you."

Obito smiled, "Trust me, I know exactly what I'm doing . . ."

To be continued . . .