Smile, Blink, Frown

The schedule dragged long. It started with the Processional, then the Greetings, Pointless Choir Singing, Principal Speech, Superintendent Address, Honorary Speaker Speech, Salutatorian Speech, then her. Darcy Lewis estimated that it would take at least 36 minutes for the ceremony to reach her part. With that, she would have 36 minutes of nerve-wracking anxiety. The fact that she was about to give her first public speech did not help since she had been living in recluse for most of her life. She may be witty and sarcastic but only when it was needed. The attention she garnered was always unnecessary and she'd rather be with people she was comfortable with… and comfort was out of the question this time. She was by herself as always, seated in the front row of the auditorium, followed by other scholar students and staffs, while the procession was finishing. There were a multitude of noises behind her, from students and mostly parents who were so excited for their children. Mothers were yelling for their sons to turn around and smile for the camera. Fathers cheered for their daughters. Friends and family even held up signs and threw confetti. Good thing her own friends exuded at least an ounce of elegance.

"Darcy! Fix your hair! I can't see it from here!" someone from the back yelled. The people around Darcy were perplexed. Judging from the source of the voice, they were surprised that such a voice can come out of that slender body. "You think people these days would have the decency to move away when someone is trying to take a picture, EXCUSEZ-MOI!"

Darcy grinned. She looked down to see her brown hair set gently over her blue gown. It was beautifully styled into curls especially for that day. Her 'stylist' came to her bright and early the day before and started prepping Darcy for what the stylist called "the most important day of a high school student—second to prom." But to Darcy, today was the day second to nothing… since she didn't go to prom (she forgot about it actually and she couldn't care any less about it). Her stylist was eagerly sure to pamper Darcy more for this day. It was alright. She needed the distraction anyway. She needed to relax somehow. She had spent three months living in her basement in front of her computer screens. Since she wasn't getting any results from all her hard work, she gave in to the efforts of her stylist to get her ready. Her stylist was also her friend, someone really close. She needed the company and that person came with no hesitation. When Darcy called her, she answered so quickly as if she had been waiting for that call forever.

"I got it, Jeanne! It's fixed! How's my face?!" Darcy turned around and yelled back, surprising even more people. The tall blonde in the back held a thumb up and "elegantly" snapped more pictures with her "sophisticated" zoom telephoto lenses. Darcy smiled widely for the camera, and tried holding back laughter. Not only it was already funny enough that someone graceful like Jeanne would act like an over-supportive mother, the two people next to her reacted in a way Darcy has always expected. Flanking the French heiress in the right was Darcy's favorite artsy angel, Ivy Nguyen. She wore a simple yet fashionable dress that Darcy guessed to be something of her own creation. The newly-admitted FIT student sat with a timid smile, waving cutely back at her friend, mouthing words of apologies for causing such a racket. On the left was the ever disdainful Alex Meyer, who was accepted in the Mozart Conservatory in Salzburg, Austria. He sunk in his seat in shame, returning Darcy a grimace. "You owe me," he mouthed. Those three were so different in so many ways but Darcy loved them anyways. All of them had already graduated and she was present in all of them even if she was the only one out of the rest that came. Jeanne was angry that Darcy was the only one that visited her in France for her own graduation, more angry that Alex didn't show up. Alex invited no one to his and actually sent the wrong date to Jeanne. Darcy still came anyway. And Ivy was grateful enough that Darcy came. But that day, all three of them were present. She didn't know the full reason why but she didn't care. She maybe alone in her seat at that moment, but there were people that have her back.

Or was it because Pepper called two days ago and told her she wouldn't be able to come?

It was no big deal, right? People were busy and she knew that there were more dire matters than this stupid two hour long ceremony. She wasn't only missing a father; Stark Industries was missing its biggest shareholder and inventor. It was not only her that wanted her father back but the company wanted its chief back and the United States government wanted its weapon specialist back. She wasn't the center of the world; she never has been and never will be. If she had to rank herself in how important her existence was in society, she wouldn't even see the high pedestal that Tony Stark on top of the pyramid. After all, she wanted this. She wanted less attention. She wanted to be normal. She wanted to blend in with the crowd and be an average girl… the average girl who's only graduating high school. No big deal.

Darcy shook the thoughts out of her head. She shouldn't throw a tantrum. She shouldn't be upset about this. But a part of her was laughing inside her head. It was just funny how she worked so much to be ordinary and she couldn't have the most ordinary thing in the world: have parents come to her graduation. But she wasn't alone, though. Her friends are with her, friends that were there to support her. But shouldn't the mother also come to support her daughter? But then, Pepper didn't actually promise that she would go. But maybe she's coming after the ceremony. A woman like her is very organized and needs every time she can use to do her job. Maybe she was just saving time after the graduation so she and her daughter can celebrate. Yeah, maybe that's it. Maybe.

But she worked so hard on her speech, she pouted. Her nose twitched up. The piece of paper right there on the podium was something she never opened to anyone. It was something that she has always kept as a secret. It was time everyone should know about it. And Pepper was not there to witness it.

The mention of her name snapped her out of her rambling mind. She looked up to see salutatorian up on the stage looking directly at her with worried eyes. She looked around and saw more eyes on her. Everybody was silent.

"Once again, I introduce this class' valedictorian, Darcy Lewis," the salutatorian repeated while gritting his teeth. There was sporadic applause from the audience and she heard a teacher hissing for her to get up. Darcy closed her eyes in shame. She didn't realize the 36 minutes to fly by so quickly. Not to mention, her anxiety was still there. She had no time to mentally prepare herself for the speech. The attention she was getting wasn't helping either.

Great, way to be normal. You're on the right track, Darcy. She sighed.

She attempted to response indifferently by putting her eyeglasses on, taking her time to smooth her gown and go up to the podium. She heard whispers in the back of her head—hackneyed name-calling and unoriginal jokes. Darcy thanked the heavens that this could be the last day she'd hear Sierra's colorful vocabulary. But then, hearing Sierra's voice was kind of calming her somehow. It reminded her of everyday, normal life. That was all she should be: normal, average, and ready to rock this speech. She looked down to the papers and saw the speech. Okay. Deep breaths. Smile. Step one: Greet everyone.

"Good evening, fellow students, dear teachers, friends and family. I want to thank you all for coming tonight," she greeted with a smile as she looked up to see the audience. She didn't expect the spotlight to be so blinding. She couldn't see anyone in the audience which made her even more anxious, so anxious that her knees started shaking. Come on, she rehearsed this for god's sake, why was this happening?

God, Darcy. Don't make a show. Just get through with this. Let's be normal.

"To tell you all the truth," she began, "I wrote this speech like a week ago. The one's I've been rehearsing with the teachers for three weeks now was actually a speech I found on Google." Laughs reverberated from the audience. Darcy also felt glares piercing her from the back. It was probably the principal. But at least the people were laughing and that eased down the shaking. Be normal. That's all I got to be.

"As you can infer, yes, I did have trouble writing this. At first, I was going to write about how dreadful the American education system has been acting so far, no offense to the school," she grinned but she felt more stares coming from the back, "But I realized that would be too controversial because it's true, again, no offense to the school." She could see people laughing and nodding. This is good. Keep going.

"So I confided with a good ol' friend of mine, probably everyone's friend, I mentioned him earlier… Google. And I looked up how to write a good valedictorian speech. Something normal yet that something that would inspire all of you, my dear classmates, to follow your dreams and reach for the stars." The last sentence oozed so much sarcasm that Darcy could probably be tackled by the principal any minute then.

"Then I saw that keyword and realized something. The word, 'normal'. Definition: conforming to a standard, something usual and typical. Regular. Average. Ordinary. I saw that keyword and I realized that there is no normal for me. There will never be any 'normal' in my life. For all my life, I grew up believing that I was different. When I was born, my mother didn't tell even anyone about me but, my legal guardian, her best friend. She didn't even tell my father. Then my mother died, and left me to her best friend's care which also happens to be my father's secretary. So I got pretty abnormal parents." Gasps spread throughout the auditorium. She wondered what Jeanne and the others were thinking.

"Also, I was also homeschooled in California because my Dad can be overprotective. But my new mom thought that I should be out there with the other kids and live a normal life and to not be so… different. So they sent me to boarding school. In New York. " How nostalgic. Darcy remembered scenes back then when Tony and Pepper were arguing whether she should go to school or not. "I know, pretty normal, right?" The audience laughed.

"I was nervous because it was my first contact with other seven year old kids and I wanted to make a good first impression. My mom also thought that I could fit well with the kids there because we all had the same circumstances: overprotective and over-doting parents. But I had some troubles, you know, fitting in. I was quite different." She moved her gaze to where her friends were sitting. It was hard to see because of the spotlight but she looked anyway. "I thought differently. I acted differently. I read different books. I said different words. It was ironic because my purpose there was to be normal and yet…"

"But you know, I had fun. I made some friends. It was hard, at first, but I pulled through and I made some pretty memorable memories. Good and bad. Then I found out that I wasn't being normal enough. Boarding school was not normal, apparently. I wanted to be more ordinary. I needed to be more ordinary. So I went here to this ordinary public high school," she smiled. She was sure the principal was ready to explode any minute. "But guess what? Turns out there is nothing ordinary at all."

"This is one of the most esteemed high schools in New York and I got to meet all this school's esteemed students and after four years, I found that the ordinary and normal that I've been looking for did not exist. One proof of that is this," Darcy took out her phone. "This is my phone. It looks like a normal, ordinary iPhone. But you see, when I press the home button..." The audience watched intently as Darcy pressed the button. The screen flashed a blue orb spinning in the center. The orb rotated and diminished into a single blue line. Darcy pulled the phone near the microphone and smiled, "Hello, ASTRID."

The blue line then distorted into audio waves and a dulcet voice echoed throughout the hall.

Hello, Darcy.

Murmurs followed the simultaneous gasps of breath from the audience. Ivy and Jeanne grinned with pride while Alex just whispered how Darcy being a show-off.

"I'd introduce you ASTRID, but I'm sure the kids here would want to get diplomas already and get this over it so just show them what you can do. " Darcy grinned, feeling satisfied of the people's reaction.

Entering the lighting system. Switching yellow spotlight 2 to yellow spotlight 3.

"Thank you, ASTRID. As you have heard, I now have control of the lighting system in this room and now I'm going to move the spotlight on me…" she tapped the screen of her phone then in that instant, all lights turned off. The entire auditorium drowned in darkness. Students began talking out loud, sending curses to the valedictorian on the stage. Parents started panicking. Teachers yelled. The principal could be having a heart attack. Darcy waited for five seconds to enjoy the noise until tapping her phone a second time.

"This year," she remained in her calm disposition and watched the spotlight flicker on. It wasn't placed on herself but on eleven specific students below her. All attention were focused on the eleven as Darcy said, "These eleven students participated in this National Robotics Competition and won first place after presenting their humanoid creation playing the piano. If you tell me, that's normal then there's something wrong with you." A few students bowed their heads in embarrassment as people began to clap for them. Darcy waited for the applause to die out until she tapped the second time, adding another spotlight on another group of students.

"These are our Mathletes who traveled to Lenana, Kenya to teach other children math. They rose over $5,000 through fundraising and winning math competitions to build a school for these children. That's something you don't see every day."

Another tap.

"There are our art students who painted murals in soup kitchens around the city."

Tap.

"Our cheerleading girls who got the State trophy two years in a row now."

Darcy could've thought that she just saw Sierra smiling at her. The girl actually looked nice for once.

"And our football team, led by Chuck Johnston, won the New York Championships for three years in a row—a victory that this school has not seen in twelve years." Applause and cheers roared through the auditorium as Darcy tapped her phone again to shine the spotlight over the football team. She caught the eyes of the certain jock that tormented her for four years. A wide smile greeted her, blue eyes ajar in shock that asked why she was doing this, why was doing all of this.

"And to save the best for last," she tapped the glass and turned on the lights on the entire student body "…is all of you who made it through these four years thanks to all your great talents, excellent skills, impeccable intelligence, and unparalleled hard work." The whole auditorium roared with cheers and claps. Someone even started throwing confetti. Darcy laughed at the sight. Everything was going well. "Not only that, we are here to not thank ourselves for our awesomeness, but to thank our teachers who did everything in their power to keep us here even though there were times when we didn't want to go." She added another light on the first rows where all teachers and mentors were seated as laughs erupted. "So, yeah, teachers, you get a spotlight, you fantastic beings you."

Then Darcy gulped. Blue eyes blinked as it scrolled down the page of the speech. It was already reaching its end.

"But all amazing things have its amazing roots," she turned her gaze to the back of the room, "Without them, we wouldn't be anywhere near where we are standing now. They taught us how to laugh, how to cry, how to love. Their support is what kept us going. Their company encouraged us to be more than normal. And now, I present the last spotlight to the last group that made all this possible." She stared at only one part of the back. Even though the area was all under shadows, she kept her gaze straight to the two seats where they would have sat. She stared only at the seats unfilled by the two people she cared about. They weren't there and she was aware of that but it wouldn't hurt to imagine that they'd be there in their little blonde wigs, listening the entire time. It wouldn't hurt to make up a fantasy that the two of them would be sitting there with smiles filled with pride for their daughter. It wouldn't hurt to think that they were there to look at her back. She tapped her phone again to turn on the last spotlight and brought out the biggest smile she had made in her life. "To our friends and family, thank you."

Darcy blinked to adjust her eyes to the light. Then she blinked again… just to make sure she wasn't hallucinating or anything. All eyes were placed on her, ovation raised to a higher volume. She smiled when she met their eyes. She smiled, blinked then frowned. Then came another blink and she smiled again. Then a frown again. The cycle repeated with increasing intensity as the crowd filled the hall with applause. Smile. Blink. Frown. Smile. Blink. Frown. Smile. Tears. Blink. Frown. Tears. Blink. Smile.

Somehow she forgot the words written on the paper in front of her. There were more sentences left to be said but there were things that weren't written on the script. Some things were not supposed to happen. She wasn't supposed to kick this speech in the ass. She wasn't supposed to be normal. And certainly, she was not supposed to have the power to make imaginations come true. As she smiled, blinked, and frowned repeatedly, she scanned the audience to see if anyone was seeing the same things she was. She glanced at Jeanne who looked at her with worry as continued to smile, blink and frown. Her eyes began to burn as she returned her gaze back to the two seats she wanted to be filled. Tears threatened to fall as she smiled again. Two people smiled back. She blinked. And they were still there—smiling at her.

They were there. They were there. They were there with her. She was there. He was there.

Darcy's smile flattened to one last frown. This last frown was all of it—all of the emotions she felt for past three months combined. The frown which held all her sadness and worry became the frown that became her release. . Everything that she had been holding back for so long and it all came pouring down. As she let all of her fears away into that one frown, as her worries weighed her tears down from her twinkling blue eyes, comfort and relief resurfaced in her body. Happiness flooded back in her mind while all the doubts rushed out.

He's home. He is home. He is finally home. She repeated that sentence over and over again inside her head as she kept her gaze straight like an arrow while the she whispered, "Thank you."

"Thank you," she said again… and again. She bowed her head to hide tears and continued to whisper, "Thank you." It was only a matter of time that the audience saw their dear valedictorian streaked with tears. He promised me. He promised me that he will come. And he did. He came. He came home. He's finally home.

At that instant, a loud cough from behind broke the silence, distracting Darcy from completely breaking down right on the stage. Blue orbs opened wide and realized that the papers in from of her were wet from her tears. The last paragraphs of her speech was blurred and distorted from the teardrops. She sniffed silently and wiped the tears off her face and paper. The words were already unreadable but that was fine. She already memorized the whole thing anyway.

"There is nothing ordinary, nothing normal about any of us," Darcy breathed out, letting a quiet sob escape along her words. "And we have to remember that every moment we set a foot to the whole new world out there. Stand up tall and look ahead with determined eyes. Months ago, I felt my ground shake as my mind and body could not find any inspiration to write this paper and among other things. All of us encountered one of those days and we will continue to experience them in the future. But don't forget who you are and where you came from. I actually acquired a book from my father…" she coughed. All eyes were on her but her own blue eyes remained steady on one specific person. The man stared back just the same. "He thought that he had given me a book belonging to my mother but actually it was just a random book from his office. He fails on being sentimental but I give him a star for effort. I'd point you all to him but he doesn't like attention," she chuckled, earning smiles from the two people she was staring at. Finally, there were people that shared her inside jokes. "But I read it anyway because you know, I'm a big nerd. And there is one thing that stood out to me… 'Every Stark must always have iron in his backbone'."

The audience gave no reaction but she saw her friends' eyes grow wide. Ivy stifled a gasp and Jeanne slacked her jaw open. The two people who don blonde wigs in the back must have been shocked too.

"It's a big secret that I've been meaning to tell everyone," the valedictorian grinned, "I'm secretly a Stark… wannabe."

Darcy could've thought she heard sighs of relief or… was it failed anticipation?

"I mean, we should all be like that, that is the only message I give to you tonight… Not a wannabe Stark, but a real Stark, or even someone greater than the great Tony Stark. Be someone that stands strong with iron seeping through bone. Be someone that aims high and make the world better. Like a Stark, we will make our marks on our world. Like a Stark, we give a brighter future. Like a Stark, be extraordinary. Thank you and congratulation to the not normal class of 2008."

Silence rang in her ears. She immediately had the inkling that her speech may not have sounded awesome as it did in her head. Maybe the speech was too long, too dramatic, pointless, uninspiring, cliché. Or maybe it was just too awesome they just couldn't handle it. Darcy nodded at herself. Yup, her speech was too awesome.

She scanned the crowd and saw the people were just staring at her. Even the people backstage were just standing there. Okay, maybe it really did suck. But there was no sense of disappointment or anything. People weren't looking at her with sad eyes. There were no awkward glances or disapproving gazes. They were all just looking at her… as if they were waiting for something.

Darcy was done though. She looked down to her paper and saw that there was nothing left to say. She coughed inwardly to pass the awkwardness she was experience and began to gather her papers to exit. A part of her wished that she could just dash out of the auditorium right away but she was still missing a diploma in her hand. A part of her hoped that the ceremony could be over so that she could run to the most important people in the world. A part of her—

"Hey, you forgot one!" The silence broke. All the audience looked to the back for the source.

Darcy whipped her neck up faster than she can process the sentence. Her heart thudded anxiously in her chest. She knew that voice anywhere and anytime. She knew that voice and she missed it. She hasn't heard it in three months.

"W-What?" she stuttered, inching closer to the microphone. Blue eyes blinked nervously and impatiently for the answer. The man was wearing a sloppy blonde wig. A stoic face remained in his features. He did not reply immediately. Did he regret saying anything? He was supposed to be normal, right?

"Forgot what?" Darcy asked again.

"The spotlights," he yelled. Darcy squinted her eyes to see more clearly. The man sat back graciously in his seat, arms crossed between his chest, one arm subtly covering the other wrapped in a sling. He was injured, but he held his chin up confidently. "You forgot one more spotlight."

Darcy couldn't believe she was actually having a conversation with him in opposite ends of a giant concert hall. He must be really enjoying this, she bet. However, she was still confused. She had a list of whom to shine the spotlights on and she got all of them. She scrambled through her papers and everything checked. Nothing and no one was missed. Who else has she forgotten—the principal?

"I-I don't understand," she stammered, "I didn't forget an-

"You, goddamnit," she heard a whisper from behind. She turned around and saw the principal sighing at her, "You forgot yourself."

Darcy's mouth turned to a little "o" as she realized. She debated if she should follow everyone's wishes and shine a light on herself but there was thought to keep her humility strong. Plus, there might be someone in the audience who might be thinking that she was so supercilious that she kept the best for last.

"Meh, whatever," she shrugged as she tapped her phone. The sound of the spotlight flickering on was loud and her eyes flinched at the brightness. But what even surprised her more was the boom of applause that followed. A grin grew on her face as she saw her two most important people stand up, followed by her friends, then everyone. She felt the need to bow her head in thanks, her brown curls covering her eyes, but for once in her life, she felt everyone's eyes on her and she liked it. It wasn't so bad after all. The feeling was exhilarating.

Smile.

Oh god, I'm becoming like Dad.

Blink.

Darcy's head snapped up again.

Oh my god, Dad.

She looked again to where he was sitting.

Frown.

Dad?

The seat was empty. Her grin returned to a frown. The seat next to it was also unfilled.

Has she been hallucinating all this time? Has her fatigue come to the extent where she has mixed fantasy with reality? Of course, he wouldn't be there. It couldn't be possible that he would return the day she was graduating. It's not like he planned to be missing all three months to return the right day. And if he did return, Pepper would be there to tell her. She would get a call or some kind of alert. He couldn't be possibly be back. It was not just logical. It just wouldn't make sense.

"And now, I will give our Superintendent to commence the presentation of diplomas," she spoke stoically and proceeded to walk down the stage. Her legs felt limp as she went back to her seat. Blue eyes monotonously watched the faculty prepare the diplomas. Of course, he wouldn't be back. He wouldn't be back to hear the Principal call her name. He wouldn't return just to see her walk across the stage and receive her diploma. It was a measly thing anyway. It was just a piece of paper. As other students cheerfully hopped down the stage with big smiles, she felt as if she was walking a walk of shame back to her seat. Everything was a blur after that. Students stood up and lined up for the stage. She got her diploma first and she tiredly watched other people jumped for joy as they got their own. Cameras flashed, parents clapped, hats rose high in the air. Maybe Jeanne, Ivy and Alex were there screaming for her like the other families, but she couldn't bring her head up. She was afraid that she'll see the two empty seats again.

"You almost gave me a heart attack right there in the end, you know? Mentioning your grandfather and stuff."

Smile.

"Well, that would've been a really funny joke if you knew my situation right now, right Pep?"

Blink.

"I didn't know if you were gonna turn that light on yourself. I was ready to shine you a blue circle light."

Smile.

"Again, inside joke."

Blink.

Tears.

"Hey, didn't I always tell you to keep you chin up? Straighten your back and look at me, kiddo."

Blink.

"So much for that 'A Stark must always have iron in his backbone' thing. Again, that almost gave me a heart attack."

The other students were busy with their own celebrations. They laughed with their friends, hugged their families. But she sat there with genuine disbelief as if it was the first time she was taken by surprise that day. She counted to five to see if she would be shocked again because they weren't really there. She pinched herself and blinked multiple times. Both of them were grinning at her, blonde wigs shimmering along with the stage lights behind them. Pepper held a sincere smile, proud and happy for her daughter. The other looked at her with a smug grin that held more pride in himself because everything went according his plan. He indifferently inserted one hand into his pocket and held a 'thumbs up' with his injured one. Darcy was ready to jump out of her seat to wrap her arms around them but she controlled herself. If she wasn't careful enough, all her emotions would just overwhelm her and she. Herself, was unsure of what the outcomes would be. Instead, she wiped her tears away and timidly asked, "Can I hug you?"

Tony raised an eyebrow, "Well, this is the first time someone has asked for my permission to touch me." Pepper could only smile back as she was as well trying to contain her feelings. Darcy would've laughed at his retort but she couldn't bring herself to. She had so many questions that swam through her brain as she looked at him broken arm in a sling. One was what could've happened that gave him that injury.

"Don't worry, I'm sure you can't break it any furt—guh bear hug." Tony groaned after Darcy practically sprung off her seat. He could feel her blue satin sleeves winding around his neck, her hair sprawling over her back. He chuckled inwardly and embraced her back with one hand. He forgot what a hug felt like after for long three months in the cave. Instead of smelling the arid sand, he smelled French lavender shampoo. Instead of being mishandled by immoral terrorists, he embraced her little girl again. It was a different feeling than his last hug with her. She was skinnier and somehow taller. Brown eyes softened. He was not the only one who has changed.

She used to be just a baby, someone so small that she couldn't even wrap her hand fully around his thumb. He used to hold her and cradle her to sleep. He held her when she first said her first words—caught her when she stumbled on her first steps. He was there for all her birthdays.

"You're here."

He patted her head when she created her first circuit, her first program.

"I'm here." He started to hear her sniffling.

He carried her while walking on the beach. He was there when she talked about going to school.

"I looked for you."

He was there when she got to her first school, first laboratory.

"And, you found me."

He held her after she got kidnapped. He was there while she recovered. He was there when she got the keys to her house.

"I didn't sleep."

He was there when she won competitions. He was there when she passed her road test.

"Me neither."

He was there when she cried about her first boyfriend, her first heartbreak.

"You remembered to come."

He called everytime he left for trips. He called before leaving for Afghanistan.

"I promised, didn't I?"

Now, look at her. Look at her give an amazing speech. Look at her holding her diploma.

"Welcome back, Dad."

Meredith would've been happy to see all of this. She would've been proud. But now, he was the one happy. He was one that was proud because look at her. Look at her.

"I'm home."

Look at how much his little girl has grown.