In response to Frequently Asked Questions in the Reviews Section: Was I high when I wrote this? Never been high in my life, buddy. Was I drunk? Never had alcohol either, my buddy, my man. Do I have ADHD? No fricken idea, angel. Honestly, I have no explanation. For any of this. But anyway.

Guest: UPDATE OR I WILL GET MAH MAFIA DUCKS AND HAVE EM KILL STARK ILL RELEASE HIM FOR 5 CHAPTERS MUHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHA plot update or I will kill stark

In order to save poor Stark from Guest's duck mob, I will consent to updating more. For fun. I don't know. Enjoy, I guess.

Sorry if it sucks.

The Merciless Fox Child

Chapter 24

Chūnin Exams (Part 7) - Team Chili

At some point while Sasuke and Sakura were moping in the corner over their lack of normal teammates, the real Kakashi had arrived, along with an unknown Jōnin.

"Um...guys? Why is there another me?" Kakashi-sensei asked.

Sakura groaned, "Ask Naruto."

Sasuke made a noise of agreement.

Kakashi and the Unknown Jōnin then turned to face Kakashi 2.0, Stark, Kyuubi, and Naruto. "Naruto? Can you please explain why there are suddenly two of me?"

"Hm? Oh, that."

"Ahem," Kakashi 2.0 began, "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Señor Pato Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramírez, Cousin of Victor Ernesto Savannah Sinclair, also known as Stark."

"U-um, nice to meet you? But, may I ask, why are you—"

"Wait, wait—hold up. Stark's real name is Victor Ernesto Savannah Sinclair?" Naruto asked in shock.

"Hai, Aniki—but as soon as you took me in and saved my life, I felt as if I was reborn. And with my life, I was given a new name—by you! Thank you, Sir!"

"No problem, Stark," said Naruto, lightly petting Stark's feathers.

Stark ruffled his feathers and bowed his head. "It is an honor to be petted by you, Aniki."

"But that still doesn't answer my question," Kakashi interjected, "Why exactly does this Señor Pato Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramírez, Cousin of Victor Ernesto Savannah Sinclair, also known as Stark, look exactly like me?"

'Wow, Scarecrow-sensei has a really good memory,' Naruto mentally commented to Kyuu.

'Even I'm impressed.'

"Oh, you wouldn't believe the security around this place! They wouldn't let me in until I thought to disguise myself as Stark's aniki's sensei, from the photographs he so often sends me!"

"Wait a minute," Sasuke said, "you can speak English?"

"Forget that," Sakura interjected, "what photos?!"

"I plan on becoming a professional photographer," Stark said, ruffling his feathers proudly, "I practice all the time; my main talent lies in candid photography."

"Ahem," the Still-Unknown-Jōnin-That-Everyone-Had-Forgotten-About interrupted, coughing, "I believe we're here for a reason?"

Kakashi hit his fist into the palm of his other hand, "Ah, right! Kids—and...various non-human entities—this is Hayate Gekko. He's a Tokubetsu Jōnin, and he's one of the Proctors for the Chūnin Exams."

"Yeah, but why's he here, Kaka-sensei?" Naruto asked, crossing his arms behind his head.

"I was told to retrieve a number of people and lead them back to a room where they'd then speak with the Hokage, who apparently has an...assignment?—an assignment for them."

"Who," Sakura asked warily.

"Ah, let's see"—cough, cough—"it says here," Hayate said, examining a clipboard, "I am to retrieve a Mr. Naruto Uzumaki, a Mr. Kyuubi no—what?"

Kyuubi glared intensely at the proctor, his glowing red eyes flashing, his pupils slitted, and his long, sharp teeth showing while he snarled.

"Something wrong," Naruto asked, smiling innocently.

"A-ah, n-no…" Cough. "As I was, as I was saying…Mr. Kyuubi no Kitsune, a…Señor Pato Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramírez…jesus…and a Mr. Victor 'Stark' Ernesto Savannah Sinclair. That's it, I think—this way, please, if you would follow me…" Hayate coughed as he turned around and began walking down the hall off to the side. Shrugging, Naruto, Kyuu, Stark, and Señor Pato followed obediently. The rest of the Genin-plus-Kakashi were then left to wait in the large room with the creepy Sand shinobi lurking in the corner.

An hour or so later, the group returned sans the potentially sickened proctor.

"So, we've got news," Naruto began, "First of all, I'm not on you team anymore."

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?"

"Geez, calm down, will ya? Let me finish. Ahem, as I was saying," Naruto continued, ignoring his shocked ex-teammates and sensei, "I have been relocated to a newly formed team consisting of me, Stark, Kyuu, and Señor Pato."

"Y-you're joking, right?" Sasuke began, "D-dobe…?"

"Nope," he smiled, "Apparently all of my actions since joining Team 7 has resulted in the Hokage becoming a severe alcoholic, and so one night when he was drunk off his ass, he suddenly decided that the perfect cure was to give me my own team. No worries, though, our teams will still be acting together as a sort of joint-team, and as for the now-vacant spot on Team 7…" Naruto paused to unzip his jacket (it was goddamn cold in the Forest of Death), revealing a large mint-colored bunny. Lifting the floppy ragdoll of a rabbit, Naruto proudly declared "This is Loaf, also known as Bunny X. He's very…lax. He's also your new teammate."

"You're kidding, right? Please, tell me you're joking," Sakura pleaded, almost looking like she was going to faint.

"Nope! Anyway, I've got to go now—me and Hayate are proctoring the next part of the Exam! Laters!" He was about to leave when he suddenly turned around, "Oh yeah, and my new Genin team, Team Chili, will also be competing in the Exam from this point on. Have fun!" Suddenly Naruto turned around and sprinted out of sight, gone before they could even blink. Loaf lied calmly on the ground before them in a heap.

"U-um…" The remaining members of Team 7 all turned and looked at one another, before looking back at their puddle of a teammate on the floor. "Umm…"

Kakashi sighed and kneeled before Loaf, gently lifting the totally pliant bunny off of the ground and turning to place him on Sasuke's duckbutt. "This will be your new home now, Loaf. I hope we make you feel welcome."

"Oi-oi, sensei—"

"Hush, Sasuke. Don't be rude to your new teammate."

"B-but—"

"Shh…Quiet, now. Let's all just take a deep breathe and relax. Soon, the next part of the Chūnin Exams will take place, and you all need to be ready—that includes you two as well, Stark and Señor Pato, I suppose." He sighed, and looked towards the door from which the Genin had came. "And now…we wait."

To be continued...

End of Chapter 24.

Ja ne!

P.S. I don't check my email often, so if you wanna contact me my Tumblr is thatdjinni.

xx BL, out.