Chapter Twenty-Five
There was one major flaw in SHIELD's security: if you wore a suit, no one questioned whether or not you were supposed to be there. While Erik missed his trench coat and fedora, it was a small price to pay. A grin played at his lips as he passed yet another agent that paid him no mind.
Another flaw SHIELD had was their fondness for making everything out of metal. Erik's sense were going haywire, and a strength that he had not felt in years coursed through him as he walked through the steal tunnels, descending down into the bowels of the agency.
With a swipe of his hand, Erik slid the high-tech door in front of him open soundlessly. Hand still outstretched, he cautiously entered the observing room only to find that it was empty. In fact, all of SHIELD had been oddly empty. Erik shrugged. Wherever they were, he hoped they were having a good time, because there was going to be hell to pay when they got back.
Erik crossed over to the window and stared through it at Mary MacPherran. Or should he call her Titania? Chained to a chair, she didn't really look like the magnificent Titans she was named for. In fact, she didn't resemble a super-villain at all. Young villains these days had no clue how important it was to keep up appearances.
No matter. Erik wasn't here to give her advice, he was here to free her. With a wave of his hand, her chains were broken and the door to her cell flew open. Wide-eyed, Titania jerked up out of her chair, looking around like a wild animal and rubbing her wrists. When it finally dawned on her that she was free, a crazy light filled her eyes.
She grinned wickedly and punched a hole through the wall, making her way to the city above them.
Erik just smiled. His work here was done.
AVENGERS ASSEMBLE
Carter smiled as her dad spun her around. For all the fuss he'd made about having to slow dance with her in front of a bunch of people, he was actually pretty light on his feet. He drew her back in and sighed. "I should probably hand you over to your husband now, huh?"
"That is kind of what this dance is about," she reasoned, trying to laugh at his expression. He looked like a kicked puppy. "You giving me away."
"I thought that was what me walking you down the aisle was about. I didn't know I'd have to give you away twice. Seems a bit redundant to me. I'd make more sense if I just got to keep you," her dad grumbled. Still, he waved Bruce over and let her go. "Don't think that you can keep her, Banner. My feet just hurt and I'm going to take a break."
Bruce grinned. "Of course, sir."
Her dad jokingly did the I got my eyes on you gesture before going to stand off the side with the rest of the crowd.
Still grinning, Bruce offered Carter his hand, pulling her in close. She inhaled deeply and suppressed a laugh. Despite the shower, he still smelled like saltwater. And she didn't really have a problem with that.
"Hi," he whispered in her ear. "How are you?"
"I'm doing OK. But the guy I'm dancing with keeps stepping on my feet."
Bruce's face grew red, and he quickly widened the distance between them. "Sorry!"
"I think it's cute," Carter replied, pressing against him again. This was pretty much her happy place. Here, with him, and no one else. Yes, there were people watching (and she didn't know most of them), but that didn't matter. To her they were nonexistent. They revolved slowly on the spot.
As the band finished up the song, Tony took the stage. Carter was fairly impressed; the bar had been open for about ten minutes and the best man was already pretty drunk. "Alright everybody! Let's give it up for the happy couple!
"Now," Tony said, giving them all that signature smirk of his, "as the best man, it's my job to give these guys a toast. Apparently. I thought Pepper said toaster when she was explaining it to me, so they'll be getting one of those, too, but here's the speech that I'm supposed to give. Give me a minute to write it in my head."
The crowd laughed.
"Oh! OK, I got it! I'll tell their story!" Tony looked extremely pleased with himself. "So, you see these two people here? The first time they met, Carter almost killed Bruce. Not like, 'Die, you bastard!', but in the sense that she almost gave him a heart-attack. Which would have made him Hulk out and kill the rest of us, turning this into more of a slasher story than a romance one, but thankfully, I'm awesome and I stopped that from happening.
"Anyways, after some force-fields and cars being thrown, the two of them got trapped under a bunch of rocks together. That's pretty much when their love began to blossom. Now, I'm not saying anything happened, but I guarantee you that Bruce wasn't wearing a shirt of pants."
"I was wearing pants!" Bruce objected, making everyone laugh again.
Tony rolled his eyes. "OK, fine, he had pants, but he had a hard time keeping them up. Let's see, what happened after that... Oh! Then Loki threw me out the window! And I'll have you know that it hurt like hell. Seriously, I haven't been able to walk right since. Um, after that... right! So, Carter was about to get eaten alive by this giant-ass magic wolf, when all of a sudden, Hulk swoops in and saves her like a knight in torn purple pants. Then, being the rational person that she is, Carter jump's on the wolf's back, starts falling to her doom, and Hulk catches her. Again. Clearly, both of them are the damsels in distress in this relationship."
"After that, Hulk, Carter, and giant-ass wolf go running off into the sunset. No one knows for sure what happened while they were gone, but when they got back? We all started choking on the sexual tension in the air. Really, those two just needed to be locked in a closet until they just went ahead and fu - "
"Thank you, Tony!" Pepper shouted quickly, running up on stage and snatching the mike from her drunk husband. She looked horribly embarrassed and apologetic. "Isn't he a wonderful best man? Anyways, on behalf of the Banners, I'd just like to thank everyone for coming. It means a lot to them, I'm sure."
Tony grabbed the mike back, a crazy grin on his face. "Thanks, Pep, but this getting kinda boring. Let's get this party started! DJ, give me a fat beat to steal my friend's new wife to!"
AVENGERS ASSEMBLE
Logan leaned back against the bar, beer in hand, watching the dance floor warily. Ever since Stark had taken Carter from Banner, the new bride had been passed around to every man there. Except for Logan. And that was not going to happen. Logan just didn't dance.
"Dude, what's up your ass?"
Turning, Logan saw that intern girl looking up at him with huge brown eyes. Huh. Didn't she normally wear glasses? And baggy sweatshirts? Now that he'd noticed the form-fitting dress, Logan was having a bit of a hard time not staring. It was just... they were so big.
She rolled her eyes. "Geesh, man. Lighten up. Here, have a dri - oh, you've got one, never mind. Seriously, we're at a party. Why the angry face?"
"I don't do parties," Logan replied gruffly, crossing his arms and turning away slightly so that he wasn't tempted to keep looking at her... chest.
"Oh, yeah, me neither." The intern hopped up onto the bar and slid closer to Logan, making him jump back in surprise. "But a couple of vodka martinis later and I'm the life of the party. I'm, like, totally wasted right now."
Logan just raised an eyebrow and eyed her suspiciously. "Why are you telling me this?"
"Because," she said like it was obvious. "I'm drunk. Duh. After that second drink, my filter went right out the window along with my dignity. Not like I had much of a filter in the first place, but you guys scare me less now. Three cheers for liquid courage!"
When he kept staring at her like she was crazy, she continued. "I'm taking this moment of fearlessness to tell you that I'm actually, like, a huge fan. You're a total badass. I mean, claws? That's some serious shit right there. Plus, your hair is cool. How do you get it to stay up like that? Hairspray? Volumizing moose?"
"Why does everyone keep assuming that I put products in my hair?" Logan snapped. "Do I look like I give a shit about my hair? Do I?"
"Chill, man." The girl tossed her curly dark hair over her shoulder. "I just wanted to know your secret. Some of the new recruits think you spend so much time on your hair because you're compensating, but I was like, 'Nah, I bet that guy is huge' and they were like, 'Prove it', so now I'm asking you."
Logan had never really been intimated before, but this drunk intern was starting to scare him. No one just struck up a conversation with him because he was too intimidating. The fact that this girl had not only done that, but was now asking... things? He was both impressed and terrified. "Are you asking me about my size?" he asked, still not believing it.
She looked horrified. "Oh, God, no. I was asking about your hair. Wow, and I thought I was a pervert - oh, shit. There's my boss. Gotta run. Catch ya later, claws. Not like I'll remember this in the morning, but still. Later." With that, she took off, moving pretty damn fast for a drunk girl in high heels.
There was an exasperated sigh from behind Logan, and the mutant turned to see Coulson coming up behind him with a look of seriousness and annoyance on his face.
"Howlett," he greeted tightly. "Round up the other Avengers. We have to get back to New York."
"Oh, no you don't!" Both men turned to see and angry Pepper stalking towards them. Or rather, stalking towards Coulson. She came right up to the SHIELD agent and started poling him in the chest. "You are not going to break up this wedding, do you hear me Coulson? Tony ruined the ceremony, and I am not about to let you mess up the reception. I don't care if a giant sea monster has come up out of the ocean and is eating the Statue of liberty! No one is leaving!"
Coulson blinked. "Mrs. Stark, a dangerous and, in my opinion at least, insane criminal named Titania has escaped and is tearing the city apart."
"I told you, I don't care! Call someone else!" Pepper glared at Coulson so hard that the SHIELD agent actually flinched.
"There is no one else."
"Yeah there is," Logan said suddenly. When the two of them turned to look at him, he shrugged. "Well, she might be able to help."
Pepper thew her hands up in the air. "Call her, then. Make her go do it - because no one is leaving this party except for you, Coulson." She stomped away.
Coulson ran a hand through his thinning hair. "This had better be good, Howlett. Who am I looking for?"
"Name's Veronica Parker, works at a bar on the lower east side..."