Chapter 24 : Sneaking Mission - The Third Rescue.
Seymour was busy trying to make the blue veins in his face less prominent with a highly diverse selection of makeup and skin creams when he was interrupted by the commotion coming from outside of his personal chambers. As the ruckus drew near and the sound of bones being broken increased, Seymour looked to his personal selection of private guards who didn't even bother to nod in acknowledgment. These elites had been completely brainwashed after having undergone a vicious curse that bound them to him closer than Tromell was comfortable with. They were outfitted with the equipment and armor Solidus had an orgasm over. Two black mages and one white mage were also hidden in the shadows. Hiding the white mage in her glorious white robes was quite difficult so Seymour had her stand next to a coat rack so she looked like a cape. They remained motionless and weren't bothered by the threat of impending combat as all of them had been trained to only interfere when their assistance was deemed absolutely necessary by Seymour.
He had enough time to hastily put on some eyeliner and bit of foundation before Solidus ripped the double doors leading into his room off their hinges without using his tentacle arms or artificial muscles. Seymour stood to meet him and made no effort to hide his cosmetics. He was the type of gentlemen who could proudly display such items. Solidus was so mad that parts of his face had begun to turn deep red. He was unarmed, but still a threat in his current state of aggravation. All he needed was some wordplay to calm him down a bit.
"What the hell was that?" Solidus demanded.
"I'm sorry?"
Solidus launched one of his tentacle arms at Seymour's beauty desk. He smashed the mirror and scattered all his carefully arranged cosmetics to the floor.
"Why did you kill mymen so needlessly?" Solidus shouted at the top of his lungs. "They died like dogs! Like dogs! I don't use people like that!"
"Then you will be pleased to know that it was me who gave the order to bomb the establishment after we retrieved those miniature nukes from Home."
"I figured as much! You're acting like them!" Solidus accused.
"Who? Your Patriots?"
Solidus' tentacle arm snaked its way into Seymour's bathroom. He tore his toilet from its hinges, filled it full of shampoo and placed it inside the shower. Seymour would be sure to hunt down the person who had broken the news to him and hurt them.
"Who else?"
"Solidus, if I recall correctly it is your world that you're so worried about. I think you should be more concerned with where you came from and less bothered by the politics I operate by. Even if the mission had gone any better, which I now know for certain that it could not have given the sabotage of our third ship, the Al-Bhed wouldn't have let us have their other technology so easily. I also blew the place up to try and stop Yuna's Guardians from escaping because they were sighted there. I don't know if you've heard this yet, but I'm under the impression that they have been giving us a lot of problems lately."
The sound of running water confirmed that Solidus had opened all the faucets in the bathroom. Seymour sighed and rolled his eyes in disapproval. Solidus retracted his tentacle arm back into his suit since destroying Seymour's room wasn't quite as alleviating as he thought it would be.
"I'm sorry. Would you like a hug?"
"Do not patronize me! I thought I was in charge of that unit. Wasn't that part of our agreement? Never ever supersede my authority like that again! Do you have any idea what this will do to the morale? They won't trust me!"
"Calm down. The units do not know the whole truth about what happened at Home. They are content with what they have been told. I suggest you do not upset that balance." Seymour said. "Besides, we saved as many of them as we could. If we had not fled when we did there is no doubt in my mind that we would be short a ship and two Metal Gear's. Think of those who did not make it as weaker soldiers. If you want more men right this instant, I could always alleviate the difficulty to becoming a Crusader."
"Forget it! That's not the point. If you ever do something behind my back like that again. . ."
"Then you won't be going home." Seymour said icily.
"I don't care! I'll not have you treating soldiers like that under my watch! I told you what I stand for! I'm not your stereotypical terrorist! My ideas aren't clouded by a religious ideology or personal gain and I care about my men."
Seymour raised an eyebrow at him.
"And women." Solidus quickly added. "There are ten of them. I think. Maybe less."
"Can we be hypothetical for just a moment?"
"Sure."
"You're saying that you're going to kill me if I make a decision like that again, right?"
"That's how I read the sub context of what I said! What, do you think I'm going to buy you flowers for being such an asshole?"
"Solidus, how do you feel about death?"
"Are we still being hypothetical or are you threatening me now?"
"We're still being hypothetical. Look, I think we can both agree that death is a release. It is truly a great thing to die. You no longer have to worry or continue working in a lowly position due to factors beyond your control. In death, the fear and suffering the people of Spira experience through Sin is no longer an issue. Is that not grand?"
Solidus gave him a look of shock. Seymour didn't expect he'd understand.
"What's wrong with you? Death is wasted potential when done so prematurely. In death there is no meaning. People should strive to make their lives as meaningful as possible while they are still alive. There's no sense in embracing death as anything but an end. A dead end, if you'll pardon the pun. Why wait to die when you can live?"
"Tell that to those who can never get ahead." Seymour said. "What would you say to them? Should they join the army and make something of themselves?"
Solidus didn't have an answer to that question and found himself looking very stupid. Being strictly a military man his sense of accomplishment was partially influenced by his rank and sense of pride.
"Be happy, Solidus. I have already arranged for your personal departure from this planet. After the wedding, our mage division should be ready. I can't promise that you'll be able to take a Metal Gear with you, but with your own little army you might just be unstoppable, especially since some of the soldiers will be able to use magic. Think of how many public libraries you'll be able to tear up with them in search of records pertaining to your Patriots. They might even be a match for your brother."
"Don't be too sure about that. You could send a whole army after Solid Snake and they still couldn't kill him."
"I suppose we'll just have to wait and see. In any case, please remember that Yuna and I must be present when you finally leave us."
Seymour made no effort to hide how he was buttering up Solidus and he did it in such a way that didn't infuriate the other man. He had managed to steer the conversation into real business, which neither of them could argue about and accomplished more than bickering over something that had already been done. The mages Seymour spoke of were a new breed of soldiers that would use magic in combat. As the type of magic they were trained to use came from the soul as opposed to other external forces they would not lose any of their power. Some were trained to summon and Solidus had expressed interest in what they could conjure forth on Earth. The soldiers received additional training in magic to counter Lulu and Yuna who quickly snubbed any advantage the Tengu's would have in combat because when they weren't getting mowed down by bullets and cut in half with swords there bullets were being blocked or they were dead before they could pull their triggers.
"Don't you wish to consummate your marriage before we go?" Solidus asked haughtily.
"I'm sure it would be more fulfilling if she didn't despise me." Seymour replied. "I think less of it than I do of Sin. Besides, I'm no stranger to women if that's what you're getting at."
"And what of Sin?" Solidus asked. "I don't believe that's ever been a part of our conversation."
"To begin with, how much have you learned about Sin?"
"Everything. I'm not so sure you're fit to be in the drivers seat."
"But I will kill it." Seymour said. "And after I have killed it, I will find my release. It will be more pure than a mere sending. When I come back in ten years as Sin the technology for the Metal Gear's will have advanced enough that they will be able to destroy Sin completely."
"There goes your religion."
"I've planned ahead for that. It is none of your concern. I will be able to die and you will be hailed as a hero for contributing to the machine that killed Sin."
For a moment, the two men remained silent. It wasn't absolutely necessary that Solidus believe the lie Seymour had told him, but it would be inconvenient if he couldn't trick the other man. Much fortune had been bestowed upon him and that wouldn't ruin any of his plans. Seymour had gained great respect from the clergy and the people by bolstering their natural defenses. The fanatics loved him for hurting the Al-Bhed. He wasn't doing badly for someone who had been marked to fail. Their favor helped him get into a position where he could easily achieve his singular lifetime goal, which was to relieve Spira of its pain by destroying it. Seymour had come to have a morbid obsession with death. He saw no other hope for Spira. Even if Sin were to be miraculously exterminated that would not change a thing to him. With that monster out of the way, Spira would inevitably battle with a new crisis. There were more problems in Spira than most people thought because Sin effectively overshadowed them all.
Seymour suspected that Yuna might know of his plan or was at least aware of his morbid inclinations. If she did not consent to him then he would have to change his strategy and do some rather unpleasant things to her. He truly hoped she would be compliant. Those were complications he preferred not to think of. Solidus' mood seemed to have evened out. Seymour predicted that Solidus would now warn him to remain loyal with a subtle unspecific consequence thrown in as a threat.
"I see." Solidus said at last. "Whatever you do, you had better not double cross me!"
"Then I suppose you'll just have to be a little nicer to me from this point forth." Seymour said while gesturing at the destruction Solidus had wrought upon his room.
To Seymour, Solidus was an incredibly irritating individual who looked older than he really was. Denying Solidus of his ride back to Earth and killing him the moment he became Sin was an idea that positively elated him. The Patriots seemed like a necessary evil and eliminating them might cause more problems than Solidus could handle. Total chaos seemed like the inevitable precursor to the end of every society. However, if Solidus were to take them out from the inside rather than bombing the hell out of everything then perhaps he would have an easier time accomplishing his objective. Seymour knew for certain that Solidus was not capable of such logic. He knew that Solidus thought even less of him.
Solidus rarely spoke to Seymour if he could avoid it and Seymour had made no effort to reach out to the other man so he had to always start their conversations. Then again a man like Solidus was pressed to find friends. His personality only allowed him to truly respect those who were even more arrogant than he was. Since the two of them were on the same level they butted heads frequently.
"How could I possibly make this up to you?" Solidus asked sarcastically.
"Yuna's Guardians will undoubtedly try to save her. Oh, how I wish they were nothing but a bunch of bumbling fools who could barely survive one Fiend attack. There are some Guardians who are that incompetent, you know. Don't use the mage unit unless you have to. They're not completely ready yet. Make sure none of your guards sleep tonight. Be ready for anything."
"I still have a few tricks up my sleeve." Solidus declared. "What about Yuna? How's she doing?"
"I haven't checked on her all day." Seymour said regretfully. "I think I'll go do that now. Could you please get someone to clean up this mess?"
"I have the perfect sap for that job." Solidus said as he reached for his radio. "Johnny, if you aren't down here in five minutes I'm going to kick your nuts so hard that. . .well, I don't know what's going to happen and if I were you I wouldn't want to find out!"
"I'm kind of busy right now." Johnny said over the radio.
"Did you take that medicine I gave you?"
"Yes, but it's not working. In fact, I think it's getting worse."
Solidus sighed in frustration.
"Can he go see Yuna?" Solidus asked Seymour.
"After I've finished checking in on her and this mess is cleaned up."
"There, you hear that Johnny? You're going to have your intestinal problem examined by a professional medic, but you had better get your ass down to Seymour's summer home pronto!"
Johnny grunted in pain as a response. Solidus turned off his radio and stormed out of the room.
"Send Yuna my regards." he said. "I'll let those goons at the front door know they should be expecting a maid within the hour."
With Solidus gone, Seymour prettied his face up for five more minutes before heading toward where he was keeping Yuna. She was originally thrown in the Bevelle prison along with the rest of the accused criminals and enemies to the priesthood before Seymour intervened and had her shipped to his summer home. While spending time in the dungeon she had befriended a man by the name of Cloud who had sabotaged one of the clergy's airships while it was en route to Home. He was under the constant care of several black mages who kept casting sleep spells on him whenever he woke up. Yuna would not leave unless Seymour promised to treat him better. This might have allowed him a better chance at escaping since he was quite crafty, but Seymour wanted Yuna happy so he told the mages to hold off and focus their efforts on keeping their fireballs charged in case Cloud tried something funny. Yuna was allowed to see him once a day at any time she chose.
For now she was stuck inside Seymour's basement under the supervision of several guards. Six black mages were stationed outside the door to the stairs. These individuals were of the highest order in the sect, which meant they were allowed to wear the robes associated with that position. Yuna would have to get past them if she wanted to escape. He allowed her plenty of privacy and had only stationed two additional black mages in the room with her to watch over her so she would feel less inclined to stage an escape. The two mages had also cast a barrier spell over the area that made it impossible for her to summon her Aeons. Seymour knocked briefly on the elaborately decorated door and invited himself in. Yuna's accommodations were positively delightful. The entire place had been decorated with furniture and gadgets that the scavengers had salvaged from the Bikanel desert when they thought the Al-Bhed weren't looking.
It resembled an upscale apartment that would cost at least eight hundred dollars a month minus the utilities. Those who spent time down here criticized Seymour for decorating such a fine room with ugly machina junk that didn't work when in fact it did. It came complete with a stove, washing machine, refrigerator, bathtub, separate shower, king sized bed, and a living room filled with couches for lounging about and having a good time. Seymour had ordered his personal chef's to prepare another lavish banquet for his fiancé and they obliged heartily. The kitchen table was filled with food, but not much else. Yuna was sitting on one of the three leather couches in the living room that had been situated to provide optimal viewing of the tastefully arranged novelty lamps. She didn't even acknowledge that he had come in the room and pretended to be fixated on the traffic light in front of her. The two black mages sat to her right. They were real downers on the overall hip vibe of the basement. Seymour strode into the kitchen and ate a few pieces of Solidus' sushi because there would be hell to pay if Solidus suspected that she didn't like sushi as much as he did.
"You haven't even touched any of this." Seymour said with his mouth full.
After snacking on a few more pieces he went back into the living room and sat down in the couch to her left. He couldn't help but smirk as he realized how futile trying to talk to her would be.
"Are you upset?"
"Of course not." Yuna replied sarcastically.
"You really should be thanking me." Seymour said arrogantly.
"Why? What exactly do you want from me?" Yuna demanded.
"Nothing more than to take the burden of the Final Aeon off of your shoulders by volunteering myself for the task. Does that not make things easier? Who would you have chosen without me?"
He had posed a good question. There weren't any among Yuna's group that were completely willing to give up their lives for the cause except for maybe Kimahri. His life had never held any other purpose aside from protecting her. Everyone else had places to return to after the deed was completed. Since Kimahri was an exile he would find himself alone. He was in a better position than anyone else to end his life alongside her. Yuna saw this as partially irrelevant given the subtext of their conversation and sought to turn the argument in her favor.
"That has nothing to do with the point. What do you intend to do as Sin? I can answer that question for you. In the many years that this horrid ritual has been a part of life there has never been a Sin yet that has destroyed as much as it could have. Whoever is the Final Aeon awakens as Sin with the same mentality he or she began with. It is only gradually that they begin to lose control of who they are as they are absorbed into Sin. That's why the clergy's response has always been swift. They deal with the problem before it gets out of hand. But what if someone like you were to become Sin? A murderer? Do you intend to use Sin as a tool for revenge against the people who have despised you because of your race?"
"You're so delightfully creative." Seymour mused. "Do you really think I killed my father without a reason?"
"How could you possibly justify it?"
"He abandoned me and my mother after his plan to unite the Guado and the humans through marriage fell flat on its face. We were shipped away to Baaj Temple and forgotten as my father tried to repair the damage he had done to his political career. While there I was trained to become a summoner and I embarked on a journey to destroy Sin with my mother about twenty years ago. At the time she had a mysterious ailment that could not be cured so she saw it fit to be my Final Aeon. You see, she wanted her son to be recognized for his bravery and accepted because of it. When I lost her to Yunalesca's magic I was unable to continue. I was so weak. It took me a month to recover my constitution. In that time I came to embrace the idea of death, but I was too late. Sin was defeated by a summoner more capable than myself."
Yuna had never heard of any of this and it didn't seem like Seymour was lying. Obviously he had managed to cover up his past quite efficiently.
"I had failed and there was nowhere else I could go. Picture my melancholy as they forced me all the way back to Baaj as an embarrassment. An abomination. A failure. It was not until my eighteenth birthday that my father finally sent for my retrieval. That was ten years later. I do believe your father had just committed himself to the pilgrimage at around the same time I returned to Guadosalam. Why was I suddenly welcomed back with open arms? Because the tensions between the Guado and the Humans had loosened through no effort of my father who I eventually killed so that I could inherit his position. Now look at me. I have exceeded him and I will marry a human woman to solidify how compatible our two races are. In doing so I will destroy his memory."
Seymour's motives were a combination of soiling his father's memory and killing as many people as he possibly could for what he believed was a noble purpose befitting of acceptance. They were rather uninspired and definitely stemmed from the trauma he had endured as a child. For that Yuna could not fault him, but he wasn't coping with his pain in the most efficient way that he could. He had probably reached a point where he wouldn't change his mind and was unstable enough to toast anyone who tried to use even the most remote persuasive psychological on him. These stories were appealing to her womanly weaknesses and beginning to make her feel sorry for him. After all, aside from being a lunatic he did have some good still left in him. If she had allowed that to continue she might have wound up marrying him on that alone and trying to change him. Luckily, Yuna wasn't quite that stupid even if she couldn't help but sympathize with him.
There was still one part of his plot that didn't add up and Yuna sought to clarify it.
"Why are you trying to make Spira a better place when you plan on leveling it in ten years?" Yuna asked.
"Poetic irony." Seymour responded indifferently. "Besides, I couldn't have gotten so popular without doing what the people wanted. Eviscerating the Al-Bhed, solving the water problem, offering rewards for killing bothersome Fiends, promoting equality among nobles and peasants. . .I'm sure you're familiar with all of my policies. I've selected a retainer to carry on my work while I'm away. Spira will be a great place until I return."
"I refuse to be a part of this." Yuna said strongly. "Seymour, I know you've been through a lot, but you can't just blow up the world because of the childhood you had."
"Forgive me for not being clear, but I don't think you fully understand. I'm doing this to relieve Spira of its horrid cycle of death. The process will actually be rather painless. I'm not a monster. Not yet at any rate."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Well, I'm dead." Seymour declared cheerfully. "At first I thought I should be grateful for that, but lately I've been experiencing inexplicable urges in the back of my mind that I keep at bay with my magic."
"You're turning into a Fiend." Yuna said.
"Precisely. Now whose fault do you think that is?" Seymour asked sarcastically.
If not for the presence of the two imposing practitioners of the black arts, Yuna would shoot him dead and then perform the fastest sending in summoner history. She still had Snake's USP securely fastened to her inner hip. There were five additional fully loaded clips in her bag of holding, which was laying innocently on an empty wardrobe in the master bedroom. As she never presented herself to be much of a threat aside from her powerful summoning abilities nobody had thought to search her. Yuna couldn't risk taking advantage of their ignorance quite yet. Seymour stood up and walked over to the door leading upstairs and stopped short of opening it.
"Do not force me to do anything that will be unpleasant for either of us, Yuna. If your Guardians show up to rescue you I will offer them a chance to surrender. If they do they will not be killed so long as you do what you're told. Consider it a wedding gift."
Before he could leave there was a loud, abrupt knock at the door that sounded like someone was trying to force their way in. Seymour tore the door open and came face to face with a Tengu soldier carrying a large cardboard box in both of his hands. He was struggling to keep himself steady in the tiny corridor and breathing heavily underneath his mask. The box was so big that he barely could carry it by himself at all. His arms were noticeably stretched beyond their normal limitations.
"Candygram for Lady Yuna!" he exclaimed heartily.
"A candygram is a delivery of candy, you idiot." Seymour said.
"I know, but that's what I was instructed to refer to it as! Can we not argue? I need to put this in the room now or I'm going to topple over myself!"
The soldier forced his way in and put the heavy box down as quickly as he could. He then leaned over it and sighed in relief. Upon discovering that the correct side wasn't facing up he rolled it until the arrow was no longer disagreeing with the position of the box. When he stood back up Seymour seized his shoulder, which sent a paralyzing burst of energy coursing throughout his body. While he stood frozen in fear Seymour stood in front of him and examined him carefully. Not being one to be stupid he tore the mask off of his face and recognized the timid soldier underneath. It was Johnny Sasaki. His name was synonymous with suspicious behavior and he usually didn't get along well with the other soldiers. At least it wasn't one of Snake's partners. Seymour opened the box to be sure of its contents and sorted through a multitude of gifts from the people. There were several exotic perfumes, a couple of hand knitted blankets, a painting of a horse being attacked by a beaver and other assorted junk that didn't seem like good ideas for wedding presents. Seymour waved his hand in front of Johnny's face to relieve him of the spell.
"Also sir, Tromell has orchestrated a bachelor party." Johnny said.
"At whose house?" Seymour asked as his blood pressure began to rise.
"Yours, sir." Johnny said, feeling very much like a messenger about to be killed by his king. "Surprised?"
"Hardly. Go help handle the guests while I prepare myself."
"But I haven't finished cleaning up the mess in your room!"
"I'll do it." Seymour insisted angrily. "Are Quistis and Logan here?"
"Weren't those the two who made fun of me while I fixed your plumbing?"
"Since your next response will be a yes let's cut to the chase. Make sure that they are given plenty of liquor. If they pass out within the hour I'll make it worth your while."
"Affirmative. Is there anyone else you want me to take care of?"
"Tromell. Tell him you're in charge of this party."
Johnny nodded and put his mask back on as he climbed the steps and made his way towards the living room. It seemed humiliating to give a career soldier such odd jobs, but Johnny was truly a jack of all trades and capable of doing anything with a fair degree of proficiency. It was then that Seymour remembered his promise to the man.
"Yuna, go get Johnny and have a look at his intestinal problem. I will not have this party turn into a disaster. If he has one of those diarrhea attacks again there's nothing to stop Tromell from being an idiot. The man couldn't host a funeral! You're free to do as you please after that. By the way, it would spoil your image if you revealed anything we've discussed to any of the guests."
"Can I at least go over the presents I was given in private?" Yuna asked.
"That's fine, but do be quick about it. I dislike keeping up appearances more than you do."
Seymour looked to his mages.
"Help her carry the box into her room and let her be." Seymour ordered.
The two nodded and used their magic to levitate the box into her room. Seymour rolled his eyes. They could have at least tried to physically carry it as they could really use the exercise. Underneath all those robes they were pasty, skinny, and covered in scars. Yuna entered her bedroom after Seymour left. The black mages didn't follow her around this time like they usually did. Neither of them bothered to move away from the couch. She locked the door behind herself even though it wouldn't do any good if they really wanted to get in. Yuna was overtaken with awe at the amount of gifts the people of Spira had sent to her. Some were even from Mount Gagazet, which was where she should have been. Yuna arranged everything in her room and pocketed some of the smaller items. There was even a beautiful new robe awaiting her approval.
When she reached the bottom of the box she became momentarily perplexed because it had been raised significantly. Judging by the side it should have been much deeper. It was then that the box began to rustle slightly as something moved inside of it.
"Could it be a dog?" Yuna thought aloud.
The fake bottom ejected from the box. Snake popped out over the side with his M4 ready to fire. He examined the room from his cardboard concealment to ensure that they were both alone. Yuna was so shocked that all she could do was blubber incoherently. Too many thoughts were bombarding her at once. Snake was no longer wearing his hip authentic camouflage and instead had reverted back to his basic sneaking suit. He wore enough equipment to take on a small platoon all by himself under favorable conditions. The situation became even more interesting when a black mage dressed in blue suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Yuna gritted her teeth together and pointed fiercely at the new arrival who responded by taking off their hat. Lulu was underneath the conspicuous top.
"All clear." Snake said.
"How did you get here?" Yuna asked immediately.
"Wasn't easy." Lulu said with a heavy sigh. "I'm going to need you to follow me into the bathroom."
"Why?"
"Because there might be a tracker on you. We think that's how they found you." Lulu said.
Snake lowered the thermal goggles around his head and waited while the two women had some naked time in the bathroom together. Since now was as good a time as any he decided to check in with the others over his nanomachines. He opened all the frequencies so that everyone could talk to him at once.
"We've secured Yuna. Report." Snake ordered.
"C4 in place. All the traps are primed. Nobody spotted us, but there are guards everywhere." Otacon said. "Rikku says hi."
"I'm keeping this mage costume." Raiden said. "Cloud Strife has been sprung."
"Thanks, Jacky boy, I'll take it from here. Remind me to thank Lulu in person a little later. The clergy originally planned to attack Home with six Metal Gears. Four were being carried in one airship, which I blew to pieces with a ton of C4 I had to go and grab before I embarked on my mission. If you can get close enough to put ten pounds of C4 on one Metal Gear, then it's dead. But you probably already knew that given your encounter with the TX-55 unit."
"Ten pounds? Are you trying to kill God?" Snake exclaimed. "How big was the explosion?"
"I thought you'd be interested so I filmed it. I'll show it to you later. I know you'll like it. Anyway, I was caught before I could find a place to hide on the second ship. From what I hear they have ten more Metal Gear's." Cloud said. "I have no idea where they're keeping their little nukes. My guess is underground, but I wouldn't even know where to look."
"What about the nukes I gave you?"
"I hid them just in case they might come in handy later on." Cloud explained. "They're safe for the time being. I think I might give them back to the Predators in exchange for them to stop chasing me around."
"And our airship?"
"The regular weapons are at full capacity, but our high powered laser beam is still iffy at this point. We can use it, but I wouldn't recommend it." Cid said. "Is Yuna okay?"
"She's fine." Snake assured him. "Since the operation is going like I expected at this point, proceed to phase B."
Lulu came out with her hat back on, keeping her face hidden just in case something bad were to happen at the last minute. Yuna followed her out confidently, obviously not ashamed that she had been poked and prodded by the other woman. Snake lowered his rifle and crawled out of the box so he wouldn't look stupid while he spoke to her.
"The tracker is on the back of her neck. I had to use magic to find it since it's enchanted."
"What's going on?" Yuna asked patiently. "Are you getting me out of here?"
"We're not here to save you yet." Snake began. "That's tomorrow. We're going to get rid of Seymour and Solidus in one shot if we can help it. All you have to do is stay calm and perform the sending when Seymour dies."
"A summoner's staff has been hidden near the altar. It is invisible so you will need to sense it. Grab it after the explosions start. You may be blinded as the traps go off, but don't worry about anything aside from performing the sending. Call forth an Aeon when you are finished and then look for Tidus. If all else fails, improvise." Lulu explained. "You're a smart girl. You don't need us to tell you exactly what to do."
"So grab the staff, do the sending, call an Aeon, and look for Tidus." Yuna repeated.
"Basically." Snake said. "That's the plan. Leave the technicalities to us, but be prepared to improvise."
"The festivities will begin right before you are pronounced man and wife. You won't have to kiss Seymour." Lulu said.
"I understand, but there's something about Seymour you should know beforehand." Yuna said.
She explained to them why Seymour was such a bastard. They weren't moved by his sad story.
"I'd trade with him in a second." Snake said. "You think that's bad? I've got stories that will make you want to kill yourself."
"I know we've got to get rid of him." Yuna affirmed. "But I thought it would be better if we all knew where he was coming from."
Yuna bowed graciously in front of her two rescuers.
"Thank you so much for coming to save me." Yuna said.
"It's nothing." Lulu assured her.
"Always a pleasure." Snake pitched in. "We'll see you tomorrow morning."
"For now, you'll need to lead us upstairs." Lulu instructed. "I will provide cover for myself and Snake."
Yuna nodded affirmatively. Lulu cast an invincibility spell on herself and then placed one on Snake since they would be traveling together for this phase of the operation. She also put a masking barrier up that made it hard for other mages to detect their presence. While Lulu wasn't arrogant enough to deny that the magicians who served under Seymour were talented they still couldn't match her abilities. Yuna walked out of her bedroom and watched her two malevolent guards carefully as she exited the room. They both stood up and began following her at a distance. She couldn't hear the two companions she was secretly helping and she swallowed hard to squelch the onset of her panic. Since the mages made no effort to attack and didn't bother breaking away from her Yuna figured that they were completely fooled.
A mass of guests had poured into the living room and immediately greeted her with a few jovial whoops and hollers. They were all nobles or held some position that made them better than the common people. Even so, there were still some influential members of the lower class hanging out in the shadows and making crude jokes about being affluent. Tromell must have gathered most of them all at once and then lead them to Seymour's. Booze was being filtered out of the kitchen quite efficiently and Johnny was nowhere to be seen. Tromell had already hooked a small group into listening to him lecture about something. Snake and Lulu couldn't make it through the front door as it was currently staffed by two guards who weren't part of the festivities quite yet since nobody had given them anything to drink so they made their way out of an open window and headed to a designated spot where they would regroup with the others. Yuna was under the impression that they still had a lot to do before the night was over.
She went back to her room so she could fetch her bag and prepare a special potion for Johnny so the party wouldn't be a total disaster. Once the mixture was properly prepared and flavored she located the bathroom where all the screaming was coming from. The door hadn't been locked because the three seconds Johnny could have spent on that needed to be applied elsewhere since he was having quite a personal emergency.
"Johnny?" Yuna called.
"Pain!" Johnny replied.
"I think this might help." she said.
Yuna opened the door slightly and rolled the potion in.
"Not another one of these things! Why don't we throw some chicken bones across my belly while we're at it?"
"Yuna!" Solidus called.
She turned to address him and saw that he was already stumbling. He was holding a full beer in one of his hands and having trouble standing up by himself. In fact, he couldn't even manage to lumber over to her successfully. Instead he leaned up against the wall and motioned for her to come closer. When she did, Solidus took another drink and seized her by the arm and brought her ear right up to his mouth at an angle that hurt her neck. Her fragile cheeks rubbed up against his beard that had the exact same consistency as a sink scour and smelled strongly of wet bread and seasoned meat. His beer was overflowing with head because Solidus inadvertently sucked the top out of habit when he drank from bottles.
"You're not really going to marry that bastard, are you?" he muttered.
"How many drinks have you had?"
"One!" Solidus proclaimed proudly. "Take that, alcoholics! Especially my brother, Solid Snake! While it may only take me one drink to reach a level of euphoria, it takes them around five or six! Now answer my question before I break your neck."
"Am I really going to marry Seymour? It looks like I have to."
Solidus kept his lips in her ear for a moment while he thought over her answer. Yuna sighed and couldn't help but wonder why so many things on her pilgrimage had been derailed by alcohol. There was her initial encounter with Tidus that didn't go so well, Snake's godly liver, and now Seymour's bachelor party. When she thought about it specifically she remembered that alcohol was promoted by the priesthood as a release. Yuna didn't see the point in relying on booze to help her become happy. This was why everyone else usually drank but her.
"Shitty." Solidus said as he pushed her away.
Yuna tried not to eye him curiously and took his interest as flirtatious and concluded he was coming on to her. At least he was a minor improvement over Seymour even if he had tried to kill her. Johnny seemed to be doing a little better since his outcry's had subsided into guttural grunts and prolonged groans. He would be of no help to her. All she had to fall back on in case Solidus got touchy was Seymour, which didn't seem so bad given the alternative. She couldn't let the old man suspect this and stood poised where she was as Solidus put his back to the wall and slid down to the ground.
"I was married once." he began.
She sighed and rolled her eyes. Yuna supposed she could have expected something like this to come about. It was quite odd that he had come to her in his stupor. She couldn't really blame him. Yuna knew she had that aura about her that made it easy for other people to confide in her. Hopefully Solidus wasn't the type of person who forgot everything he did while he was drunk. Perhaps if she was nice to him he might take that into consideration a little later.
"God, she was a bitch. She even slept with a member of the Patriots. . .I think. Have I told you about the Patriots?"
"Snake mentioned. . ." Yuna was cut off.
"Mentioned?" Solidus roared. "That's not good enough!"
Twenty minutes later, Yuna had received an alternate view of the organization. The two of them hung out in the unlit hallway near the water closet together as Johnny slowly recovered. Yuna's two black mages watched from afar and didn't seem too affected by the steady stream of margarita's they were being fed by Seymour's servants. She sat down a comfortable distance away from Solidus, just far enough to let him know she was listening but didn't want to be groped. Solidus' side of the story was quite compelling, but he also wanted to bring destruction to achieve his goals. Surely there had to be a way to slowly take them out from the inside and seize control over the group without so many unnecessary casualties. That was how Snake believed they should be taken care of. The two men essentially saw the Patriots in the same light, but obviously couldn't find enough common ground to work together.
Johnny eventually came lumbering out of the bathroom and quickly rushed into the living room to take control of the party again. He was in such a hurry he didn't stop to thank Yuna or check the back of his pants for the piece of toilet paper still sticking out of his clothes. Solidus used a tentacle arm to snatch it for him and then tossed it into the nearest waste receptacle he could see from where he sat. He then went on to tell Yuna a total of ten separate stories, but he told them in such a way that he accidentally went into one and then had to back up into the other to finish it only to launch into a completely different story instead. Solidus was a man slighted by those who were more powerful than him. All he wanted to do was end the dictatorship imposed by the Patriots and put true democracy back in its place with a few changes, namely his self appointed position as president for life. Elections could start up again after he died. Or something. Apparently Solidus would have made enough changes by then that the next president couldn't possibly mess up his decisions in the next four years.
A servant brought him an entire bottle of banana rum from Besaid that he drank straight.
"Anyway, that's why everyone hates me so damn much." Solidus mumbled.
Yuna stood up and knelt down in front of him.
"You can always change."
Solidus' head wavered for a minute and then slumped to one side. Yuna shook him gently only to discover that he had passed out just when they were getting somewhere. She sighed and hoped that she had at least managed to plant the smallest seed of doubt in him that she could. In the end, he would probably die tomorrow and Yuna couldn't decide if it was for the best or not. Seymour had to be stopped, but Solidus was still at a point where he could be redeemed. While using child soldiers was a little extreme he had still united them to fight for a moral cause and given the situation their presence was necessary. Her reaction wasn't quite so extreme as children in Spira had been known to become warriors at an early age. Apparently Solidus' people weren't quite as lenient.
Yuna felt sick about Solidus' impending doom. It was quite a cruel trick of fate that she found herself sympathizing with him more than Seymour.
"Is he bothering you?" came a voice.
Yuna jerked around and came face to face with Seymour, who was completely sober. He looked incredibly irritated. His nerves had been frayed by the party and he was looking to take out his anger on someone. Why the town insisted on staying up until question marks when half of them had to be up at six in the morning to help out with the wedding was beyond his reasoning.
"No." Yuna said. "He just needed someone to talk to."
Seymour knelt down and picked up the bottle Solidus had been drinking from. The whole thing was empty. Not even a drop remained inside.
"Is he feeling guilty?" Solidus said almost mockingly.
"Yes." Yuna said, trying to hide her empathy. "He's in a lot of pain."
"I'm in a lot of pain." Seymour affirmed with a hint of jealousy in his voice.
"I know." Yuna said. "We all suffer. You, Solidus, me, my friends. . .everyone. That's what you want to end, right?"
He smiled at her approvingly. Yuna silently thanked the instructor who had taught her diplomacy and charisma.
"It's what I will end." Seymour said. "I have no guilt. I'm not weak like him. You must always be sure of yourself. If you live in the past you wind up like some poor fool who can't talk to anyone at a party except for someone's fiancé next to the water closet. It's even worse when the fiancé is a generally accepting individual who doesn't steer anyone away and tries to diffuse hostile situations through her speech."
Yuna bit her bottom lip. Apparently her ploy hadn't gone quite as well as she had thought it would. Then again, this was Seymour. Not only could he suddenly show up behind the person he wanted to talk to without them being aware of his approach, but he also was highly sensitive to flattery.
"But honestly, that's my kind of woman." Seymour admitted. "It's a shame you weren't my mother. We've got a big day ahead of us tomorrow. If you want to rest, then go right ahead. I'll make sure you're not disturbed. I have to play host for as long as these cretins want to mooch off of me. I'd suggest you not stick around for too long. These really aren't the type of people you would get along with."
"I'll rest. For the sake of his dignity, could you have Solidus moved to a room somewhere?"
"As you wish."
She didn't bother thanking him and headed past her two body guards. A sea of people were clogging up the living room, kitchen, upstairs balcony, and the better half of the lounge. The doors were wide open. Anyone could walk right on in. Seymour's security really had their hands full. Yuna didn't bother to be polite as she made her way through the crowd. Before anyone could stop her so they could chat she was already gone. When she shut the door to the basement behind herself a mass of spectators she had attracted slammed themselves up against it with a dull thump. The mages walked through the barrier mystically and trotted down the steps behind her. They occupied their former posts while Yuna entered her bedroom and changed into some lighter clothing so she could sleep easier.
The walls were thick enough so that she couldn't hear what was going on upstairs, but Yuna still couldn't sleep. The finality of tomorrow both exhilarated and frightened her. If they did away with Seymour, that would solve a few problems and create many more. After being sent, Seymour wouldn't have the power to keep everyone at bay like he had been doing. They would be hunted down as assassins. Yuna could lose her right to complete the pilgrimage and be excommunicated from the church. No matter what happened, she would still defeat Sin. The will to do so was firmly in her heart and her friends would definitely support her. There was also the question of whether Solidus should be given a second chance or not. She really wished Snake would come back and go over the situation with her once again, but Yuna knew he was probably busy planting bombs somewhere.
Her memories of her father and the thought of how defeating Sin would redeem her of the crimes she was about to partake in were the only two things that kept her from losing it.