Author's Note:
Hooray! This is a lot longer than the last chapter, so that should please you xD But here, have another box of tissues. *gives*. I apologise in advance. There are more feels in this chapter.
But two chapters in the space of two days? I think that makes up for it ;)
Earlier that day…
Rocketing through the air, Tony keeps his eyes on the small white blip on the tiny screen at the top right of his visor. He's clinging onto hope, but a hope that's almost smoke – difficult to catch and keep contained because it's barely there at all, slipping through adamant fingers that refuse to give in. He will remain resolute until the blip turns red, but he's sure that even if it does before he gets there, he'll pursue Loki in ignorance because ignorance is bliss. That's how the old saying goes, right? He just prays that he'll be able to keep all thoughts on the matter at bay until he sees him – Loki – for himself. But no, Loki will be alive when he gets there. Loki will be alive for a long time yet. Tony Stark will make sure of that.
"I hate the Atlantic ocean," Clint grunts, yawning widely. Tasha sighs but responds no further, instead keeping her eyes on the endless blue both below and above. Since the news of Loki's whereabouts, Thor has brightened up significantly; the storm is far behind them, possibly even over in New York City, and the sun is shining. It glints off of Tony who is flying just ahead. "It's stupid."
"Why is it stupid?"
"It's way too big. Like, unnecessarily big."
"…You're bored, aren't you?"
"Really?" Clint drawls, voice dripping with sarcasm. He yawns again. A long silence passes, the only sound audible being the muffled roar of the quinjet's engines outside.
"I actually find it quite small."
Clint tosses a jelly doughnut behind him, hoping it whacks the god on the head and explodes preserves onto his disgustingly luxurious hair. "Shut up, Thor."
A few hours into the flight, Nick Fury's voice exploded into the aircraft.
"I'D LIKE TO KNOW WHERE THE FUCK YOU ARE TAKIN' MY QUINJET AND WHY YOU ARE TAKIN' IT WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND WITHOUT AN OBJECTIVE SET BY ME."
"Oh crap."
"Jarvis, cut communications with our dear Director, would ya?" Tony growls, also a part of the conversation, and Fury is in the process of saying another word when his voice dies out completely.
Tasha chews on her lip. "He's gonna kill us, you know."
"Then we die knowing that we did the right thing. Oh please, come on, he couldn't kill us if he tried."
"He could. Some of us at least."
"Hulk will protect us. Right Brucie?"
Tasha tilts her head around to see Bruce who offers her a small smile and a shrug.
It's evening when they cross the Swedish border, but the long daylight hours mean that it's still light enough to see.
"We're right behind you," Tasha says in Tony's ear. "Just tell us where to go."
"It's not much further. See that open area of land over to the right? Between the trees? Land there. We trek on foot to the shack where Amora's got Loki." Her name is poison on his tongue and he spits it out with repulsion.
After landing, Tony waits (impatiently) on the ground as the quinjet's engines power off and his teammates join him, some shivering a little in the rapidly falling temperature.
"We head north west for about a mile and a half. When we reach the location, Widow and Hawk will take the perimeter – scout it out." Tasha and Clint nod. "When they get back to us and give us the run-down on details, we'll decide who goes with who and where. I'm guessing Skurge will be there somewhere so I suggest we leave him to Hulk. The rest will be arranged later. Got it?" This time, the entire group nods. The white blip on the screen blinks. I'm coming, Loki. Just hang in there, just a little while longer.
"Skurge is guarding the front entrance," Tasha explains breathlessly, placing a hand on Clint's shoulder to steady herself. "There's no back door - just one way in and one way out."
Cap steps forwards. "We need to get Skurge away from the door."
"We need a diversion," Bruce affirms, already quivering. Tony lays a metal hand on Bruce's arm.
"Don't give away our position yet. Okay, so Hulk will lead Skurge away from the door. Cap, Thor and I will head inside and look for Loki and Amora. Let's just hope her magic is having an off day, for all our sakes."
"What about us?" Clint asks.
"You take the roof. Tasha, get behind that small bunker of dirt between the trees so that you can keep your bazooka aimed at the door. If Amora tries to escape, you blast her to smithereens."
"Gotcha."
"Okay Bruce. You're up." Tony turns around and Hulk grins down at him. "Woah, you're already there. Well, go get 'em, tiger." Tony uses his arms to present the direction of Skurge and Hulk roars as he thunders towards him. Skurge is so surprised that he loses himself for a moment – one, fateful moment – and is thrown sidewards by a clobbering green fist. Not knowing how much time they have, the others leave Tasha behind and race towards the shack – Tony, Thor and Cap diving inside and Hawkeye springing up the walls and onto the roof above.
There is a voice talking at the end of the hallway. Light is scarce, only a faint tinge illuminating the hallway which exists solely because of the glow that's flickering around the edges of the closed door straight ahead. As Tony turns, however, his arc reactor lights it up further. The wooden walls are strewn with cobwebs and grime, rotted in more than most places and Tony swears he sees a rat scuttle across the pathway ahead of them. He hates rats. Stealthily, they creep towards the door. The voice gets louder. It's Amora.
"…You hate Thor. Why would you want to see him happy?"
"Because I would rather see him contented than see you ever succeed." Loki. That's Loki. Tony's heart skips a beat from joy because god, is it good to hear him speaking. There's silence for a moment, and the three Avengers reach the door. Thor raises his hammer but Tony shakes his head and puts a metal finger to the mouth of his helmet.
"You may despise me, Liesmith, but not as much as you despise yourself. You have always hated yourself. And you hated yourself for hating your brother. He showed forgiveness and he never stopped caring for you but you – with all your self-loathing – feigned ignorance and pushed him away. You ran, Loki. That's all you ever do. You are a weak, tragic creature with no true place to call home. You are a giant by blood but you are not wanted there. You are an Asgardian by name but you do not belong there. You are nothing but a leech. You latch onto whatever you can for purpose because that is what you crave. Has it not struck you yet? That purpose is what you seek and will always seek for all your days? I am doing everyone a favour by ridding you of what makes you believe you can do more than you are destined to. It is sad watching such a lost individual trapped in an eternal cycle of failure and utter, absolute worthlessness."
When she stops talking, Tony his almost foaming at the mouth. He's quaking with anger and he wants to wrap his hands around Amora's neck just to squeeze the life out of her and watch as he does it. Thor, clearly, didn't want to listen to anymore. With a swing of Mjölnir, the door goes crashing down and they all step through. Amora snaps her head around, staring at them with wide eyes.
"HOW DID YOU FIND THIS PLACE?" she screeches, lunging across the room. Thor throws Mjolnir and she darts out of the way just as it smashes into the wall, shattering wood and opening up a gaping hole to the outside.
"YOU HAVE ANGERED THE MIGHTY THOR!" Thor booms, Mjölnir shooting back into his hand. As he goes to throw it again, Tony puts his hand up to stop him, not taking his eyes off of Amora.
"You pissed off the wrong people," he snarls. Steve nods in agreement, eyebrows low.
"I am going to tear you limb from limb." Thor grinds his teeth so hard that Tony can hear it.
"Easy fella. Let me just interrogate the bitch for a sec before you go all apeshit." He looks back at Amora. "Now I'm guessing you're using a heavy duty spell because otherwise you'd have magicked us outta here or at least tortured us a little. You're weak. I know how magic works. So what shit are you pulling?"
Amora just smirks. "Doesn't matter. It's almost done. The worthless disgrace is soon to get his comeuppance." She casts her eyes to Loki. Tony takes a menacing step forwards and she backs away, looking back at him.
"He isn't worthless. Not to me."
Loki whimpers and Tony just wants to go to him and hold him and save him but he can't right now because of Amora. Fucking Amora.
"I'm only telling him what he already knows about himself!" She trips on a table leg and almost falls as she backs into the corner of the room. "He shouldn't be surprised! All of that is what his mind is made up of. Are you sure you want that, Tony Stark? Something so insecure and wretched?"
Yes. Yes he does want Loki, however insecure he is. He wants to be the one who makes Loki feel secure. He doesn't care how broken he is or how broken he thinks he is. But how dare she call him 'wretched'?"
"You're a bitch, you know that? To use his own inner fears against him? That's wretched. What makes you any different? It's not like you have a purpose." Then it hits him. "You float about fucking shit up and for what purpose? What exactly is your purpose, Amora?"
The expression on her face that follows is priceless. It's exactly what he's needed to see.
"…I…"
"Who's the leech now?" he smirks. Thor flies past him, yelling about injustice, and smacks her in the arm with Mjölnir because she doesn't quite get out of the way fast enough. Tony fires his repulsors at her but together she and Thor fly through the wall and land far outside, right at the place where the forest meets open ground. The second that they touch the floor, a great white light explodes from both Amora and from Tony's left. Loki. Temporarily blinded, Tony bangs into tables and other invisible things as he wades through the light in the direction of the god.
"Loki?" he calls in desperation, ripping off his gauntlets after falling to his knees. He searches with his hands and locates a leg, then a torso, and then a face. "Loki?" Tugging off his helmet, Tony tosses it to the floor, not caring where it rolls off to, and pulls Loki into his arms. "Loki, hey, Loki c'mon. Stay with me."
The light dims. Now that Tony can just about see properly, he notices that Loki looks, well, thriving. Fighting fit. He simply appears asleep. All traces of any torturing of any kind are gone, his hair looks clean and his skin isn't so pale any more. Tony can hardly believe it.
"Guh." The god's head rolls up and he blinks fast, flexing his hands. Tony remembers the chains and shoves the gauntlets on to break them, then breaks the metal clasps and frees Loki from his captivity. Looking up from removing his gauntlets again, vivid green eyes meet his. "Tony." The relief in his voice is gratifying and also a reciprocation of how Tony is feeling.
"And you thought I didn't feel the same way about you. You asshole." Tony chuckles, placing his lips against Loki's forehead enthusiastically. "If I didn't, would I be here right now?"
"You read the note."
"Of course I did." Tony cups Loki's face in his hands. "Why do you have to constantly think everyone's so against you?"
"Because usually they are," the god sighs, going to get up but failing when Tony pushes him back down.
"Not this time." Angling Loki's head, Tony presses his closed mouth against cold, thin lips. Loki pauses for a moment beneath him before grabbing Tony by the back of the neck and pulling him closer. Desperate, needy sounds rise up in his throat and escape as their mouths mould together. But as quickly as it began, it's over.
"No," Loki hisses, pulling himself away suddenly and scrambling to his feet. He looks petrified, and he's thumping his chest with his fists madly, staring down at himself. Jumping up, Tony grabs his wrists, preventing him from causing himself any unnecessary damage.
"What the hell are you doing?" Loki tries to shove him away. "Stop this!"
"No! No no!" Loki's eyes are filling with tears and Tony doesn't know what to do. "No!"
"What's wrong? Loki, what's wrong?"
Beginning to shake, Loki drops to his knees. Tony goes down with him, cautiously letting go of his wrists and instead collecting him up in his arms. Loki buries his face into his hands.
"It's gone," he whispers sorrowfully. "It's gone. It's gone."
Tony pries his hands away from his face and wipes a tear away with his finger. "What's gone?"
Lifting his eyes to Tony's, the pain Tony sees in them is devastating. Loki shakes his head.
"Loki, what's gone?"
A hollow chuckle precedes a shuddering sob. "She destroyed my magic."
"How – what – Amora? – how do you know?"
Loki springs from Tony's hold and glares at him. "Because I'm empty inside! I feel…I feel…nothing! There's nothing inside me…no…no…there's nothing!" Covering his face with his hands again, he turns and bumps into Steve, who unabashedly wraps his arms around him.
"Shhhhhhh," Steve coos. "We'll…we'll fix this."
"NO WE CAN'T!" shrieks Loki, now pushing Steve away. "What's done is done. I am nothing without my magic. Nothing!"
"You don't need your magic to be something," Tony mumbles. You're something to me, with or without it. Loki snaps around.
"Yes, Stark, I do. We can't all get everything we want delivered to us on a bloody silver platter like some."
The hurt that has taken over Loki's features and attitude is turning him vicious. Tony hates it when Loki is vicious.
"Don't take your issues out on me," he snarls. "I came to save you, you ungrateful bastard. You think I wanted you taken away from me?"
"I didn't ask you to come to my rescue."
That hits Tony hard. "Well I'm sorry."
"If you'd read the note, it clearly stated that I didn't want to ruin your life further, so you were just unwise to come all of this way for a failure like me."
"GOD!" Tony yells. "Stop being such a fucking downer! You seriously need to do a reality check, you stupid dick. I came to your damn rescue because I want you in my life. I want you and all the messy, knotted strings that are attached to you. When you want someone enough you take them exactly as they are because that's who you fell in love with and who you want to be with. I will never ask you to change for me."
Tony blurts out the last sentence in a rush because as he begins it he realises what he's admitted in the last. Loki clearly realises too, because the colour of his face transposes to scarlet.
"P-pardon?"
"I said you don't have to change for me. End of story. I didn't say anything else. Nope. Not at all. Fuck." Fuck. Had he meant that? It had just slipped out! Had he meant that? No, of course – of course not.
Stop lying to yourself.
Steve is grinning.
"Friends, the Enchantress has lost her magical powers," Thor announces, striding into the room. "The green one has defeated Skurge and Amora is contained." Thank goodness for Thor and his well-timed arrivals. Awkwardness averted.
For now.
"The end of the spell must have coincided with her breaking the boundaries that the spell reached…It must have both worked and backfired…and also healed me…" Loki muses to himself glumly.
"BROTHER!" Thor exclaims with joy when he notices Loki standing in the centre of the room. "BROTHER, YOU LIVE!"
"Barely," Loki mutters into Thor's shoulder as the God of Thunder encases him in an elaborate hug. But instead of arguing any further, he slinks his arms around Thor's waist and presses his forehead to Thor's neck. It's then that Thor freezes and backs away.
"You seem different," he says warily. "Something about you is changed. You are not…you are not yourself."
Sucking in a breath, Loki hangs his head sadly. "Amora has extinguished my magic."
"She has done what?" Thunder booms overhead.
"Brother, calm yourself. There is nothing to be done."
"I will crush her bones," Thor bellows, brandishing Mjölnir. "I will rip her with my bare hands!"
"Be my guest," Loki chuckles darkly. "But it will not bring my magic back."
"There must be a way," Steve pipes up, after having been silently watching the events from the side lines. "You're gods, for heaven's sake. Aren't there…jeez, there must me something?"
Loki shakes his head as Thor's eyes go wide.
"There is…someone - "
"No, Thor," Loki sighs. "I know who you think of."
"But - "
"She will not heal me. Odin will not allow for it."
"I will talk with father. I will defend you. I will make him listen."
"He won't listen." Loki spits out his words, eyebrows furrowing.
"I will try," Thor says. "I will try my very hardest to make him listen."
"And why would you do that?" Loki shuffles from foot to foot. "Why are you so willing to fight for me?"
Thor tilts his head to the side and smiles. "Because Amora, in her fit of rage outside, told me what you did for Jane. That you protected her." He places a hand on Loki's shoulder. "Thank you, old friend."
And to Tony's surprise, instead of running, or biting back at Thor's words, Loki simply blushes and nods.
"You are my brother, after all."
At this, Thor – mighty god, God of Thunder, enormous giant humanoid creature – begins to cry. Not extremely noticeably; in fact, if you were only to glance at him, you wouldn't see it at all, but his eyes shimmer and he sniffs loudly.
"…Will you…will you allow me to help you, Loki?"
"Please help me," Loki replies, voice all of a sudden small and desperate. Thor's arms catch him as he falls forwards, and both brothers hold the other in such a way that they look like they'll never let go. "Please, please help me."
"Of course I shall help you," Thor whispers, so softly that it's barely audible. "You are my brother, after all."