Thankfully, Brambleclaw chose to let Lionpaw's punishment be the near death he was about to face. He was going to be suspended to shamefully standing in the middle of the clearing for a day with Hollypaw because of the suicide thing anyway. Stormfur only just built up the courage to drag himself back to the cave with his haunting memories of biscuits, and Squirrelflight- this is the part that made Lionpaw really feel sorry- would be completely nuts until they got back home. Breezepaw would have to bear with his wounds (happiness), Tawnypelt was still flirting with Trash, Hollypaw seemed quiet for some reason, and Crowfeather… he was Crowfeather.

After everyone- at the most- had calmed down, they headed back to the cave. It was a failed mission, basically because Talon's anger issues had to act up because of those stupid biscuits. What was wrong with biscuits? They tasted horrible and were incredibly fattening… but it wasn't something to get mad over or anything.

And that retarded Jaypaw had poofed away in the midst of all the craziness.

Lionpaw growled softly. Once I see that damn cat, I swear, I'm beating the crap out of the lump, he thought darkly. Verbally or physically- whatever. I'm doing it.

Maybe Hollypaw would know where the guy went? He'd remembered her talking to Jaypaw or something. Probably giving him a few words of "wisdom", whatever she thought that was.

"Hey, Hollypaw!" Lionpaw hissed.

Hollypaw, who was walking a few paces ahead of him, didn't turn around. "What?" she asked miserably. Her head was down and her tail dragged along the ground.

Lionpaw hesitated and decided that where Jaypaw went could wait. He sped up his pace to match hers. "Uh, what's with the long face?" He nudged her side with his shoulder. "Come on."

"You can't even see my face," Hollypaw muttered, still not meeting his eyes. She obviously didn't want to talk. Meh.

Lionpaw sighed slowly. Well, she was going to talk because he wanted her to. That was how it had to work sometimes. "Hollypaw, I'm not good at these things, but others seem to do this a lot at times like this… It's fine if I do this in front of other cats, right?"

Hollypaw shrugged moodily.

"Okay… here it goes." Lionpaw paused to add a dramatic effect. "Hollypaw… What has four legs, lots of fur, meows a lot, thinks a lot, looks like a cat, smells like a cat, eats like a cat, acts like a cat, and even is a cat?"

Hollypaw seemed startled. She finally looked up and into his eyes. "Um… a cat?"

Lionpaw then remembered that he was supposed to come up with a cunning answer that everyone could laugh at but couldn't guess. Dang it. "Well… yeah, you're right." His face heated up with embarrassment.

But to his surprise, Hollypaw smiled. No, wait, of course… because apparently being stupid was funny, too. He did that easily for some reason. Well, then there was no harm done. Sort of. "Lionpaw, you idiot," Hollypaw laughed. "You need to grow a brain." She sniffed. "But thanks for trying to cheer me up."

Lionpaw tried to look confused. "Buh… what? Ch-cheer you up?" Yes, he was a horrible actor.
"It was obvious by the looks you were giving me," Hollypaw sighed. "But… it was Jaypaw. I think we were being a little too hard on him."

"What, he go all sad faced on you?" Lionpaw snorted. "He'll make you do anything if he brings out the blind disadvantage thingy and makes you feel all guilty. Or his golden stopwatch." He resisted a shudder. That shiny thing kind of scared him.

"No, he was serious!" Hollypaw insisted. "I know he was. I mean… he's him, right? We shouldn't try to change who he is. No matter how much we want it." She looked down again. "But we should get an apology."

Lionpaw huffed. "I don't care about apologies. I just want to start being treated like family instead of another cat that's fun to tease."

Hollypaw shrugged. "I think that'll come in time. We're still pretty young, you know, we're not all serious about important stuff that should mean a lot to us yet." And we all know how wrong she is. I mean, if you've read the entire Power of Three arc and everything, you'll know, but if you don't- well, just play a-… Um, I'll stop now.

They halted in front of the Tribe's cave.

"OKAY!" Brambleclaw gasped, letting go of Squirrelflight's scruff. He'd been literally dragging her the whole way. "Now… get… IN THE CAVE!" That gave Lionpaw a distinct thought about pedo bear, but he pushed the weird thought away.

Brambleclaw stumbled over to the river to get a drink. The Tribe cats were the only ones that obeyed him, willingly rushing back into their heavenly cave.

Squirrelflight giggled and pawed at the air. "Aw, you pretty, pretty little thing!" she cooed. Then she gasped. "NO DON'T FLY AWAY!" she sobbed. "FOXIE, WHERE'D IT GO?"

For some reason, Squirrelflight had been calling Breezepaw "Foxie". "It died," Breeze- no, haha- Foxie muttered. His fur was clumped together from his dried blood. "It died in a deep, dark, smelly hole, lured by the intoxicating smell of dandelions. A magical stick used its sparkly powers to be incredibly flexible, wrapped itself around its neck, and choked it to death while horrible music by Rebecca Black played in the background. You know what the stick did after it'd killed it?" He sat down and hunched his shoulders. "It ate it."

Squirrelflight gasped. "No…" she whispered.

"Yeah, that's right, the stick ate it," Foxie growled. "When it was finished, all that was left were its bones and fat. The remains were cast in a sparkling green pit of doom where it was reincarnated into the most ugly, scariest thing you've ever dreamed of." He went for the epic-serious look.

"A-a burned marshmallow?" Squirrelflight whimpered fearfully.

Foxie blinked. "Y-yes. A burned marshmallow. And the stick is going to throw it at you one day because it… it didn't like what it ate and wants revenge."

Squirrelflight collapsed to the ground, crying. "NO!" she sobbed. "YOU WERE ALL THAT EVER MEANT ANYTHING TO ME!" She buried her face in the snow, from which huge sniffles were heard.

"Idiot," Foxie muttered, and he slid through the narrow pathway behind the waterfall and into the Tribe's cave.

Brambleclaw came back from getting a drink and had to drag Squirrelflight back into the cave. The rest followed as Stoneteller… yes, called a meeting. Lionpaw settled down next to Hollypaw and the to-bes to listen. Oh, and Breezepaw. Sure.

"EVERYBODY!" Stoneteller screeched. "I CAN'T FIND MY COMPUTER! WHOEVER STOLE IT IS SCREWED!" He looked around. "Cough up, cats! The punishment will be horrible!"

Nobody moved.

"Good, 'cause it's right here." Stoneteller held up his laptop with his tail. "Anyways, Brambleclaw's here, so we'd better listen to him again." He coughed.

Brambleclaw eyed him. "Um… yeah," he muttered. "Okay, well, bad news- Talon's anger issues acted up because of cats drinking tea and eating biscuits, and Squirrelflight's nuts 'cause Lionpaw just had to eat her darn medicine." He glared at Lionpaw. "So we pretty much failed at talking to the intruders. They kinda got scared when Talon started screaming and everything. So in the end, I have resolved to the random conclusion that we have to fight them for your territory. Everybody like war?"

"OOH, OOH, ME! I LIKE WAR! THE BLOOD AND SCREAMING IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND-"

"I'm not talking to you, Squirrelflight," Brambleclaw growled. "Ahem, but I'll let you all decide if you want to have a random war. You can just run away like cowards if you want."

Stoneteller looked around. "I don't know about you guys, but the coward thing sounds pretty heroic to me." He grimaced. "War is weak."

Lionpaw sunk his claws into the ground, even though it should have been near impossible to do that, what with the stone cave and everything, but he did it, so. Yeah. He hoped they chose war. He wanted to totally show off his awesome muscles and youth to everybody and be the heroically heroic hero that saved the day. No doubt that was definitely going to happen.

"We'll have a voting session!" Stoneteller announced. "Everyone who wants to abandon this dump, throw a rock at the cat you hate the most. Everyone who wants to stay and possibly die for a cold and prey-barren mountain, throw a rock at the cat you like or love the most." He seemed to be trying to make leaving sound better.

Nonetheless, Lionpaw pawed a random rock tensely. Nobody had moved yet- probably still taking in the fact that they had to throw a rock to vote- and he had no idea how Stoneteller would keep track of all of this, but he already knew exactly who he would throw the rock at.

But first, he needed a distraction. "Hey, Hollypaw, you know where Jaypaw went?" Lionpaw whispered.

Hollypaw shook her head. "No, but he might be out on a random, reflective, and dangerous walk right now, so I wouldn't bother with- MMFF!" A bird-sized rock (that wasn't Lionpaw's) slammed into her face, and all the cats in the cave turned to look, not having thrown anything yet. Lionpaw joined in and threw his rock at her as well.

Hollypaw staggered backwards as the rock collided with her face, spat out a tooth, and rubbed her muzzle. "Oh, god… Lionpaw, he said only one rock!"

"The first one wasn't me." Lionpaw glanced around and noticed that Breezepaw looked away. He snorted. "You really don't want to stay and fight, coward?"

Breezepaw looked back with a scorn on his face. "What are you talking about?" he growled. "Of course I want to fight! What made you- AHH!" Ten rocks pelted him at once, knocking him over. No doubt because ten smart cats hated him. But that also meant that ten dumb cats wanted to leave, too.

The cave burst into loud wails and caterwauls. Rocks flew everywhere, back and forth, and into walls when cats stupidly missed who they were aiming at. Stoneteller whirled around trying to keep track. Oddly, no cat seemed to want to throw a rock at him.

Squirrelflight fainted, then stood back up again. She then walked around the cave uselessly. I have no idea why I wrote that.

Lionpaw glanced to the side for no reason and spotted Brambleclaw trying to pin Squirrelflight down. "J-just CALM DOWN!" he pleaded. The she-cat growled, slipped from his grasp, and darted behind him. Brambleclaw whirled around to face her. "Can't you stay put long enough for me to throw a freaking rock at you?!"

"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!" Squirrelflight crowed, holding her head up triumphantly.

"Yes I will!" Brambleclaw flicked his tail towards the Tribe's giant gold bank vault that they had drilled into the cave's wall. It was where they kept their stash of money for flash parties. "I know the passcode to that thing," he growled.

Before Lionpaw could see the outcome, a few rocks hit him- for what reason, he didn't know. Then he got distracted by a bloody rage and started clawing at random things. By the time that the rock-throwing had died down, he was mostly uninjured, but he noticed that the Tribe's bank vault was half torn out. It was still closed for some reason.

Stoneteller fell to the ground from dizziness. "I'VE GOT IT, CATS!" he croaked. "THE RESULTS ARE TEN CATS TO LEAVING AND ONE HUNDRED FIFTY-SEVEN CATS TO STAYING!" Man, they had a lot of cats. It was then that Lionpaw noticed that ten rocks had hit Breezepaw. Ten cats. Look back up.

Stoneteller stood again, swaying slightly. "I guess that means you all want to die," he said. "But that's fine, as long as some cat is willing to be used as a shield." He looked around. "Anybody? It's either that or flee."

Squirrelflight piped up with a retarded look in her eyes. "OOH, OOH! ME! ME PLEASE!" She jumped up and down like a kit. "OH, PLEASE PICK ME, I REALLY, REALLY WANNA-!"

"No, Squirrelflight!" Brambleclaw meowed sternly. "You're staying in the cave because of your craziness."

"AW, BUT BRAMBLEYYYYY!" Squirrelflight whined, spinning around like a top. "IT'LL BE FUUUUNNN! DON'T YOU WANNA HAVE FUUUUNNN?"

Meanwhile, two hundred thousand ThunderClan Territory-lengths away, Jaypaw was standing at the VERY edge of a snowy cliff thinking about suicide. And how weird it was. Who would kill themselves on purpose? Forget about pain- what happened to that running away and starting over cliché? Didn't they put that in movies anymore? Great, now he sounded like some old dude that lived under a rock.

He turned and walked away from the cliff, not even realizing it was there. Then he randomly jumped on a big, round piece of bark because he sensed some sort of ancestry to his stick in it and started sliding at a fast speed towards the edge, still not realizing that the cliff was there. Jaypaw uncharacteristically laughed with joy at the thrill, the wind in his fur. Then he shot straight down the edge and died.

Hollypaw whacked Lionpaw in the head for no reason, snapping him out of his *random and *weird (*BEWTEEFULL! ABSOHLUTLEE BEWTEEFULL! [Get off, Lionpaw. -_-]) daydream. "Hollypaw, you're a Mary-Sue," Lionpaw muttered.

"I don't even get why you said that, but I'll take it as an insult and a compliment."

"How about you, eh?" Stoneteller was looking right at him.

Lionpaw was caught off guard. "Huh?" he said in a very unawesome voice.

"You can be my shield!" Stoneteller meowed enthusiastically. "C'mon, it'll be awesome!"

Lionpaw took a step back, even though he was nowhere near the old cat. "No thanks, I've got a life to look forward to…"

"Yeah, well now you don't!"

"Okay, random cats!" Brambleclaw called. "You know the drill!" The half torn out bank vault shuddered. "No, not you, Squirrelflight," he sighed. There was a whimpering noise.

Brambleclaw looked around. "Well… I see that everyone else is too stupid to know exactly what the drill is. So, uh, me, Tawnypelt, Crowfeather, Stormfur, not Squirrelflight, Crap, er, Gay I suppose, Talon, Night, all the apprentices and to-bes because I'm feeling risky, and anyone else that wants to volunteer. Um, talk to me outside if you want to come, and we'll talk it out. We're leaving at nighttime because it's cooler that way." He walked away, the entire Tribe- save the ten cats, Stoneteller, and the ones already chosen- following behind him.

Lionpaw then did some stuff.

…

"Lionpaw, Hollypaw, Puffball"- Brambleclaw snickered-"Foxie, go in there and freak them out with your bratty screaming," he ordered. "I want them to be terrified enough to stumble into our obviously planned trap."

The ground was covered in a thin layer of snow. The mountain was lightly illuminated in the moonlight. That is all I will say.

Puffball looked scared and uneasy for once. "W-wait, wait," she panted, looking around wildly. "Guys, I think I can hear something."

Everyone pricked their ears. Lionpaw heard a bird squawk from nearby, followed by a flapping of wings as it flew away pointlessly. "Yeah… a bird," he clarified. "We eat them."

"We… Yes, we do," Puffball sighed. "Okay, I think I'm ready now." She peeked around the rock that stood in front of the intruders' camp. The place was really just a bunch of rocks, dirt, and a few straggly dens.

Lionpaw flicked his tail and led the way in camp, wanting to get the whole thing over with. "Uh, don't go near the queens or kits or anything like that," he whispered, stopping right inside. The intruders still hadn't noticed them, despite the wind blowing in their direction. Maybe it was the darkness.

"Duh," Foxie snorted. "Let's just start screaming foolishly and get out of here."

Hollypaw shrugged. "I'm all for it, I guess. Okay, when I say go, scream like-… like someone just stole your brownies." She seemed to glance pointedly at Breezepaw, and Lionpaw shifted impatiently. Hollypaw began slowly. "Ready… Set… G-!"

"Wait, wait!" Puffball whispered furiously. "I… I think I can hear some cats talking!"

Lionpaw's sanity snapped. This cat was drawing out the tension too much! "Yeah," he growled, "you wanna know why? THIS WHOLE F*CKING PLACE IS FILLED WITH CATS! STUPID. FILTHY. CATS!"

At this, all the stupid, filthy cats in the clearing turned to stare at them, confusion written all over their stupid little faces. Hah, they were so dumb, they probably didn't realize they were intruding their camp.

At least, that was what Lionpaw thought, until the tortoiseshell she-cat they'd seen earlier leaped forward. "IT'S THEM!" she screeched angrily. "THE CATS WE'RE TRYING TO UNFAIRLY DRIVE OUT! GET THEM!"

The cats in the clearing hesitated. Then realization dawned on their faces as they probably realized that Lionpaw and his group been standing there for a while. They masked their surprise with anger and stopped whatever they were doing, immediately hurtling forward at full-speed, all the while making loud and unnecessary noises. But they kept tripping over one another in the moon's dim lighting and turning back to help each other up while muttering some polite apology.

"Great, look at what you've done," Foxie hissed. "You totally ruined our plan!" He looked like he was going to do one of those last stand thingies.

"No I didn't," Lionpaw replied, backing out of the intruders' camp. His eyes were glued on the approaching cats. "Guys, listen to me, we can make them go faster if we just… RUN!" He tried to make sound like he was scared, and he turned tail and scampered past the tall rock. After a moment's hesitation, the others quickly followed.

Lionpaw and the three made a mad dash for the bend where Brambleclaw and the rest of the group were waiting, their paws kicking up showers of snow. They screeched to a stop at the turn, then regained their footing and stumbled onto the crowd of cats.

"Hey, move it!" came Brambleclaw's muffled mew. "You don't want to get hurt by one of these things!" Oh yeah; they were attacking with cannons and grenade launchers.

Lionpaw rolled off of him and tried to catch his breath. That was awesome. (Whoa, that sounded wrong…)

Brambleclaw shifted the launcher strapped to his back with his shoulder blades. "Get one of these for yourselves you four. The ammo's burning in the fire, just pick them out with the sticks." He peeked out at the approaching cats and raised his voice. "Okay, cats! When I give the signal, jump out and ready your fire! Aim for the closest targets!"

Gay's voice cracked with panic (possibly for the first time in his life), his grenade launcher sagging off his back at an awkward angle. "I don't even know how to work these things!" he whimpered.

"Then throw down your gun and help pull out the cannons!" Brambleclaw meowed. He glanced out one more time. "Okay, go! Move it!"

The cats ran out- each armed with a grenade launcher, some helping to pull along the cannons- and disappeared around the bend. There were some loud fires and screeches as the intruders got hit. Oh yes.

"Here!" Puffball grabbed Gay's fallen grenade launcher in her jaws and tossed it to Lionpaw. It plopped in front of him on the snow. "Use this one. It already has full ammo in it."

"Thanks." Lionpaw slid the gun onto his back and waited as the others pawed the burnt marshmallows from the glowing fire and loaded them into the oiled and greased guns. Burnt marshmallows as ammo. Yup. Even Squirrelflight had expressed some fear towards them, even though she was… mental for the moment. Plus, the things were sticky, and nobody wanted to get that in their pelt. Lionpaw shuddered at the thought. It would take forever to get it out of his fur…

"Crap!" Hollypaw hissed as her gun poked her in the eye. "I'm telling you guys, this isn't the proper way to fight…" She rubbed her eye with her paw, then resumed to struggling in getting the grenade launcher in the right position. Lionpaw made no move to help because that wasn't the plot of the chapter. I'm warning you, Lionpaw.

Puffball reached out a paw. "Let me help!" She slapped the launcher and ended up knocking the gun into Hollypaw's head. "Hmm, you have a weird back," Puffball commented with a frown.

Hollypaw coughed.

Foxie growled impatiently. "Okay, here." He did exactly what Puffball did but somehow managed to get the gun to fit in the right direction. "Um, I think when you bend your front leg in the right position, the launcher comes to your face so you can start shooting…" Yeah, it was called advanced technology. So much better than what the stupid twolegs had.

"Can't believe you actually knew that," Hollypaw muttered.

Foxie pricked his ears. "What?"

"Nothing."

"No, I heard you, I just wanted you to feel ashamed of yourself for saying such a thing to a handsome devil like me." For some reason, Foxie grinned. Oh wait- no, he…Man, that little bitch!

"Let's go," Lionpaw interrupted. "Uh- I wanna use this thing before the battle's over." Then he realized that he could've just walked away without waiting for them. "Actually, I'm just gonna walk away without waiting for you." He walked away without waiting for them.

They were doing good with blinding the enemies with giant bubbly marshmallows, but some cats were dodging and advancing towards the cannons. Bah, of course- because nothing was ever flawless.

Except for me!

Lionpaw bent his front leg, brought the grenade launcher to his face, and noticed that that pointless brown dude, Dick or something, was already tackling Speech nearby the line of cannons. Oh yeah?! Lionpaw crouched. Click-BOOM. He shot that guy off with a black marshmallow to the face. The idiot ran around in a frenzy and plummeted right off the mountain. Served them right for making camp right on the edge of a cliff. He was on battle mode, baby!

Then he suddenly heard Hawkfrost's annoying voice in his ears whining to Tigerstar about one thing or another. Man, that dude had enough hair spray as it was! He heard Tigerstar snap back a biting response, then start talking to him. "Lionpaw, can I borrow fifty bucks?"

Lionpaw snorted, looking around for another enemy. "Since when did you need money? I thought you rented out apartments in the twoleg place. You said you made good cash out of that."

"Yeah, well… the goverment found out I was a cat, and the apartment I bought doesn't allow animals… Something about hypocrisy." There was sudden a high-pitched ringing sound, but it quickly died out.

"Shoot!" came Tigerstar's voice. "We've got crappy connection here, sorry. Anyways, if you've got any money to spare, help me, 'cause Hawkfrost's annoying the heck out of me with his need for hair spray." He huffed. "Now he wants some fancy-shmancy designer edition or something… Hey, no!"

"LIONPAW!" Hawkfrost shouted. The ringing noise came back, and his voice went all fuzzy for a moment. "LIONPAW, LISTEN TO ME. GO TO THE NEAREST HAIR SALON AND-"

"That's it, I'm turning this off!"

"NO, I'M NOT DONE! I-"

There was a clicking noise. Then silence. Lionpaw was left wondering what the hell just happened.

Lionpaw then noticed that Gay and some random black-and-white she-cat were having an intense battle, like, two inches away from him. Hah, easy. He crouched, aimed, and pulled the trigger. Six times. The cat couldn't even move when he was done with her.

Hollypaw walked up to him and held up her tail for a hi-tail. Slap. Oh yeah, that's right. "Breezepaw kept trying to terrorize other cats with his basket-ball, so I decided to ditch him," she muttered, and snorted. "Trying to act all cool…"

Lionpaw rolled his eyes. "Some cats," he agreed. But inside he was like, Oh, so that's how you want to play it, jerk? Bring it on! He was then distracted by another bloody rage. "Give me a second, Hollypaw…"

"Um-" That was all he remembered her saying.

After who knows how long, he felt Brambleclaw whack his head with a paw. "Snap out of it, the fight's over," he hissed. "We won, and we still have some fresh leftover marshmallows we can eat."

At this, Lionpaw halted. "Marshmallows?" he meowed excitedly.

"Yeah, we can have some later, son. Stripper just wants to have a few dramatic last-words to try to freak us out." Brambleclaw shook his head. "Bear with me on this, I have no idea why that guy thinks words would ever work."

"Uh, Stripper?" Lionpaw repeated.

"Oh, sorry, I meant Stripes."

"AHEM," Stripes coughed loudly. Once he had everyone's attention, he began. "I see that you will not willingly surrender," he meowed silkily. "That's fine. We will respect your borders as best we can… as long as you don't randomly attack us again, 'cause damn, I hate random things." He stopped as he realized that he had stepped out of his calm tone. "Er… I mean- oh, whatever." Stripes lashed his tail. "Just don't do anything rash or unexpected like… marshmallows, and-… and we might leave you alone. Got it?"

Crap pricked his ears. "Oh, I'm sorry, but I'm deaf, I couldn't hear a word you said." He looked like he was about to crack up, but he sucked it in. "But, yeah, sure we'll try not to do anything random." His muzzle twisted into a grin. "We'll try," he repeated.

"And you'd better try hard," Stripes growled. He flicked his tail and headed back into his awesomely concealed camp, his straggly group following.

Then Crap whistled in a tone that you would say "Whew," and Lionpaw instantly became horrified. Impossible! "HE WHISTLED!" Lionpaw screeched, scrambling away from him. "GUYS, THE DUDE JUST WHISTLED!"

Realization struck their faces like lightning. "Oh my god," Hollypaw whispered in astonishment.

Brambleclaw grinned. "Nice! Can you teach me?"

"I-it's not natural!" Stormfur whimpered while Brook stroked her tail along his back comfortingly. That guy's mental problems were starting to get on Lionpaw's nerves- he didn't act like that at home. It was like the Tribe triggered some traumatic memory… Oh.

Crap looked confused. "What? Oh." He held up an iPhone with his tail. "I must've gotten a message or something, cats can't whistle."

Stormfur sighed in relief, but Hollypaw blinked in confusion. "I thought that phones exploded if they were brought onto this mountain! How come yours didn't blow up yet?"

Crap frowned. "Exploding? But I've had this for, like, two weeks!" Either one of them must have jinxed it, because just then, his phone exploded in his face. A lesson, kids: don't bring your phone to the Tribe's mountains unless you want an excuse to get a new one.

Crap's jaw dropped. "I need to warn Stoneteller."

Lionpaw looked around. "Speaking of the guy, where'd he go? I thought I was supposed to be his shield or something."

He just shrugged. "Maybe he chickened out."

As the group began to roast and eat the marshmallows, Lionpaw heard the crackling of Tigerstar and Hawkfrost's phone. "HELLO?" Tigerstar yelled. "CAN YOU HEAR- oh, good. Did you totally dominate them?"

"I did," Lionpaw replied smugly. "Marshmallows work better than I thought."

"Okay, good. Uh, Hawkfrost says hi."
"No I didn't, I said for him to-"

"Shut up," Tigerstar snapped. "Okay, so, Hawkfrost said for me to ask you… Is your refrigerator running…? I don't know…"

Lionpaw blinked in confusion. "Um… I don't think we have one."

"Oh, well, you should buy one, then, 'cause I got one off Amazon for, like, twenty dollars."

"NO, NO, NO!" Hawkfrost yelled. "Gimmie that!" There was a static-y whooshing noise as he stole the phone from Tigerstar. "Let me try this again," he sighed. "Lionpaw, uglyguysayswhat?"

"What?"

"YOU'RE UGLY!" he laughed. Click.

Lionpaw frowned. "Huh…"

"Hey who were you talking to?" Hollypaw asked, speeding up her pace to match his.

"Buh…" Lionpaw searched for an excuse. "Thornclaw's friend, Awesomely Invisible Guy Named Bud Who Lives In A Rock That Is Underwater And Eats Pineapples Because He Likes Them, befriended me in the two minutes we were walking," he finally said.

"Oh… that's nice."

"So who were you talking to?" Lionpaw asked randomly.

Hollypaw began a long and unnecessary speech. "Well, I tried talking to Puffball, but she was too happy, so then I tried talking to Speech, but he ranted too much, then I tried talking to Foxie, but he's… you know… him. And then I tried to use my psychic powers to figure out what our immediate future would be." She smirked. "It was pretty funny."

"What did you see?" Lionpaw asked.

Hollypaw continued smirking. "You ran into a rock."

"Oh, that's-" Lionpaw blinked. "Wait, wha-?" SMACK. He felt something hard ram into his face. "Owm… yoo wher 'ight…"

Hollypaw just laughed.

Thank you to those of you that posted reviews! It was happiness. :3 I'm getting the feeling that only two or three people actually read this fanfic, but... whatever. :P It's fun writing. So yeah, have a happy Saturday, people!