Chapter Twenty-Five:

Home

"Where we love is home, home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts." –Oliver Wendell

Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar.

Everything was white and crystalline around me till I realized I was standing outside of the village. The sky above was a blue orb of perfection. Then…Enlai was standing a distance away from me with a hand reached towards me. I took a step towards him, but every time I did he somehow became farther away. Eventually I was running.

I had my hand out and my fingers became only inches from his own. His dark eyes were pleading with me. But I could not reach him! "Enlai!" I shouted but he did not say a word. It was all in the depths of his eyes. All of his hurt, laughter, and love for…me.

I awoke with a sigh, wondering what this had meant. Ever since I had left the Southern Pole, my dreams had been a combination of the nightmares from before and now these dreams. I rose from the bed I had slept in and stretched out my arms. This inn had not been half bad at all and worth the price. It had beaten sleeping off of the roadside as I had done for the last two nights. I was on the island that had been my home once. The place where I had been born and where the home of the noble Suzuki family was located. Today was the day I would return at long last.

Many thoughts had gone through my mind over the last few days. I would go to see my mother and Narimi…but I had not yet decided what to do when I saw them. I….I did not know…

But I did know that it was something I had to do. There was no going back or running away from this. It was something had to be done for my own sake of mind.

It had been pathetically easy to slip into my childhood home later that day unnoticed. The house had not been one of much largeness or wealth for my family was only minor nobility. Somehow I found myself gravitating towards the inner courtyard. I crept underneath the eaves, silently stalking the pillars. The floor was of cool wood, a kind of dark redwood that seemed like the intense redness that one sees in fire. The shadows from the narrow pillars across the walk reminded me of bars. A prison…

It was the singing that startled me. The instant I heard her voice, I knew it to be her. The soft singing was one of heartbreaking lament. I recognized the sad melody, but could not place it. "Leaves through the vine, falling so slow. Like fragile, tiny shells, drifting in the foam…"

The courtyard's red bricks were alive in the sunlight. The fountain trickled tranquilly in front of the tree. It had been not but a sapling in my memory, but now it was much higher than myself. A crying wind picked the pale, pink blossoms from its wavering branches, showering them into the air. It was on the ornate stone bench that she sat.

She was not as I remembered her. This woman was dressed in pure white robes…the color of mourning. Her midnight hair was unbound, falling past her shoulders, shifting slightly with the wind. Pale hands clasped a stringed instrument on her lap as she finished her song. "Little soldier boy, come marching home. Brave soldier boy, comes marching home."

My throat hardened at her words while the hollow in my chest pounded with my heart. Her words wafted into the condemning air. It was a child's song, one sung at the hearth-side. A song of the mother's who lost their sons to the war. Always it was the war…I had walked quietly into the courtyard till I stood only feet away from her. I still felt small compared to her for she was of elegant height. I had inherited my grandmother's and aunt's small frame. Cherry blossoms sprinkled onto me like fresh morning rain.

She lifted her head and her face became even whiter as if she had seen a spirit. Her hands clenched her instrument. "Rana…?" She gasped at last. "But…they took you." Suddenly her eyes were shining with joyous sunlight. "Am I dead then?"

"No," was my brisk reply, "You are alive as I am."

"But this is impossible…"

"I left the Society," I answered her, or at least I had already, but they thought me to be dead as well. Mari's face trembled.

"You have come home then?" She asked, her words burdened with hope.

"I came to say goodbye."

Mari's face fell back into the one I had seen upon first entering the courtyard. "All gone….just like Ebisu…Koun," She whispered. She lifted her eyes back at me. "Do you hate me?" She asked as if she were a child who was in trouble.

"I did not to begin with," I responded in a guarded tone. This woman was only a shadow of what I remembered. Father and Koun's deaths had destroyed her. Why crush what was left? I did not hate her, not anymore. It had only been a child's hate born of confusion and resentment. I had thought that she had abandoned me. Who would give their child willingly away?

Mari hugged her instrument to her chest. She began to hum the song from before. The tune cried quietly. "Mother?" I called out firmly. I waved my hand in front of her unblinking, golden gaze. She did not flinch. Only a shell…I took her head between my hands and kissed her on the forehead. It burned as if on fire. Her face was hollow, to thin…

She was ill….dying…

Does love always do that? I walked out of the courtyard with her humming ringing in my ears.

I snuck down the lighted hallway. Golden light streamed through the large paned windows that stood on one said of the hall. Dark wood doors lined the other side, while golden wood served as the flooring. Narimi and I used to slide down this hall in our socks…this hall is where the nursery and my bedroom had been. I had only seen several servants in the passing. The household had not been large in numbers to begin with. I paused when I saw a small shadow in the hallway. A toddler crept around the corner and halted a few feet away from me. He was two to three years tops. There was the baby roundness to his limbs and face, but he had a potential for a sharper angles. There was the promise of good looks there. His hair was a dark brown with a curl to it that stuck out at all ends around by his ears. His hair I did not recognize. He had the usual pale skin of the Fire Nation and light golden eyes, but their angle was more wide and full. Like Water Tribe eyes…

It was the eyes I recognized for they were the same shape and shade as mother's…and Narimi's…her son! I lowered myself down to a crouch and beckoned the child with my hand. He looked at me curiously and then toddled over. I held his soft chin in my hand hesitantly as I examined him. Her son…She was married? Narimi was only over two years older than me, meaning she has him when she was around my age. So young…

The boy's eyes looked past me. A smile grew on his small lips. "Mama!" He cried. I was suddenly very aware of an intense heat by my head behind me.

"Let go of my son," A woman ordered dangerously. I did exactly that. "Come behind me, Koun." The woman said next. The anxiety was high in her voice. The child, Koun, looked up behind me with confused eyes, but plodded on past me. She had named him after our brother? "Now stand up slowly and remove your hood. Make any threatening move and it will be your last!"

I turned and pulled my hood back. Wide golden eyes in her face looked at me with no spark of recognition. Her face was now that of a beautiful woman, but it was the face of my sister. She stood in a stance ready to attack with fire burning in one hand. My throat clogged for she looked much like Mari had once. Beautiful, strong, and elegant. Koun's small form was attached to one of her legs. She wore a simple pair of golden-tan leggings with a long-sleeved red tunic. Her stomach protruded against her shirt…she was pregnant? "Who are you and what are you doing in my home?" She asked heatedly.

"Have I changed that much, Nari?" I replied in turn. She did not recognize me and I should not have expected her to, but somehow it still stung.

Narimi's golden eyes narrowed. "Who are you to call me that?" She said in a tight voice.

"I am your sister Rana."

First her face turned sheet-white as she looked at me more closely. I pulled out the necklace Mari had given me long ago. Narimi would know it. And she did. It was a good thing when I saw her legs begin to buckle underneath her as she fainted.

It took me some effort for she was bigger than me, but I managed to take her into the nursery. Little Koun followed me while sucking his thumb. It did not take him long to be distracted by the toys while I set Narimi on a chair. It would not take her long to wake, but while I waited I watched her son with fascination. He is my nephew. I could see her in him and there were things I did not recognize. I wondered who his father is. I looked over at her eventually to see her golden eyes watching me critically. "He has your eyes," I noted, "But his hair must be from his father I presume."

"You're dead," She said in a blank voice, "I was there for the funeral!"

I laughed darkly. "That is what they wanted everyone to think." Narimi started to sit up in her seat. Her eyes darted between me and her son. She was on the alert. "Have you heard of the Society?"

There was a flicker in her eyes.

She did.

"They took me," I continued, unable to hide the bitterness in my words. "How do you know of them?"

"Mother told me after I had Koun….but she said they might never take mine," She looked at her son with worry, "Will they?"

"Not until…" I paused and stopped my words. She did not need to know. It was better that way. "The chances are highly unlikely," I said instead.

Relief swept her eyes. "You're not the sister I remember," Narimi said quietly. "What happened to you? And why…why did you come back?"

"It is a long story and one I cannot tell."

Narimi's beautiful face scowled. "I have something to tell you…about father and Koun."

"I already know."

"Oh," She said with relief, "Why have you come here?"

I could not help the anger in my eyes. "I am leaving the Fire Nation behind. This was one of the places I had to say goodbye to." I stood up from my chair. It was time for me to go. I had seen her and Mari. That should be enough.

"Are you leaving?"

"Yes." I started for the doorway.

"Don't go!" I halted and turned to look back. Narimi sat in the chair while Koun played. The image pinpricked the hollow in my chest. "I just found out you're alive," She explained with pained eyes, "Stay, even if only for awhile. I would like the chance to get to know you."

I held my breath. I had time and part of me… "Alright," I replied. "Only for awhile though."

A day turned into one. Than one into two. For the sake of their safety, Narimi agreed with me that I was her old friend from childhood visiting. It was strange to be given one of the few guest rooms to sleep in and Narimi had several clothes that had belonged to other females in the family given to me. They were meant for one small in build and I knew them to have belonged to my aunt instantly. I did not visit Mari again for she was weak in the mind already. She did not need to be haunted by old memories and feelings. Narimi had told me tearfully that she had slowly crumbled since the deaths of her husband and son. She was dying as I had thought her to be. Interestingly, I did not seem to feel much in those days concerning her.

At first I was distant, not wanting to get to close. I was only to leave again so what was the point? Our conversations were brief and never too much detail was given. Narimi was horrified when she noticed my hand. I had shrugged it off and did not reveal how it had happened. It would not be wise for her to call me Rana, so I told her to call me…

"Sayuri?" She repeated with a wrinkled brow. Even when frowning, she still looked beautiful. "What kind of name is that? It's not Fire Nation…"

"A …friend called me that," I said with a shrug.

"If that's what you want…Sayuri," She said back with wondering eyes.

People here would remember her little sister who had died with that name. Somehow it did not feel right for her to call me that and then again it did. I did not think about it. I soon learned that she had been wed in an arranged marriage to another Fire Nation noble. The man was only a second son in a low house but had shown promise of rising in the ranks. He was away at war in the Earth Kingdom…

"So that is where Koun gets his hair," I stated. It felt…unusual to address her child by that name. The toddler was at play before us in the nursery. "What is the man's name?"

"Chen," She answered with a wistful look.

Did…she love him?

"It was arranged but it was not hard to fall in love with him," She declared with a wondrous smile. Narimi had always loved and trusted easily when we were children. She was that kind of woman, but also fiercely loyal and intelligent like a dragon. Her golden eyes looked at me with open curiosity. She did not mask her emotions well. "Have you ever loved someone?"

The hollow in my chest quaked. "No," I said quickly, "I could not for what I am."

"For what you were," Narimi said warmly, "You're not one of them anymore."

I turned away from her caring gaze.

She wondered of course as to what had happened to me throughout all of these longs years. It was something I should not discuss with her…or because I did not want to. Narimi knew that the Society was an association of bodyguards, but nothing beyond that. How foolish I was to destroy that worthwhile innocence in the following three weeks. For her and for myself, everything would be changed once more…

A/N: At long last, she has met her mother and sister again! Well, thanks for reading and please review!