This is my fight song

Take back my life song

This is my fight song

And I don't really care what nobody else believes

Cause I've still got a lotta fight left in me

May 7, 2013

I stood frozen, like a deer in the headlights. I could feel waves of fury coming from Krism across the stage, but I couldn't do anything. That laugh... That laugh seemed to possess me. Liz was strutting across the stage with my mic like she owned it. The audience looked shocked, their eyes on me.

I, of course, stood still, not able to move at all. I felt my hands start to shake as I slowly turned to Liz. "Is this a joke?!" She laughed at... Me. "You people would actually vote for this waste of space? I mean, I could see Marzia winning, or Mary, or even that bitch Krism, but this piece of trash?" She tossed her hair back and laughed... Just laughed.

The entire cast looked shocked, but i focused on Krism. Her eyes were slits as she shook with rage. But when she met my gaze she softened, encouraging me, helping me. Krism was my rock, my strength. I turned to Liz again, who met my eyes with a smirk.

"And you, are you going to say anything? Are you too scared to talk to
Me. Pathetic. Freak. That's what you are. You probably did so many little favors for the producers to get on this show. Oh wait, you're a little gay piece of shit who's so above that. I regret breathing the same air as you, and that bitch you call a girlfriend. I should call and have her deported back to wherever hole she crawled out of."

I heard the audience gasp at those remarks, especially the one about Krism. How could this happen to me? What could make a person hate me so much? How could I have loved such a monster, what was this hold she had over me? I should just snip the thread, and let her go. But why was I rooted to the spot? She was nothing to me, she couldn't hurt me. I just had to fight it.

I glanced at Krism, staring into her rage filled eyes. I have to fight for you!

Krism suddenly stood up, looking ready to throw a table. I coughed softly. "Sit down Krism." She widened her eyes. "But-" I held up a hand. "Sit down." With a regretful glance she slowly lowered back into her seat, with a questioning gaze.

Liz gasped dramatically. "It speaks! What a surprise! Sticking up for yourself finally?" I turned to her, shaking. "Yes. I understand what I need to do. I've realized it. And yeah I'm an idiot. I'm stupid."

Liz smirked. "Glad you realize it, so you have a point?" I nodded. "Yes. Now please let me continue. I just wanted to know how you turned out like this, what happened to you to break you so much? I did nothing to you, and you want to destroy me. What kind of sick person does that?"

Liz grimaced. "I'm not sick. I'm having fun." I stopped her. "I told you to stop talking. Now, I've been wondering these past few months why I let you have this power over me. Why do I freeze whenever you're near? Why can you relapse me? The truth is, well, I don't know. But you know what I do know? As long as I keep believing that you have control over me I'm just going to fade away. But I don't have to believe that.

If I just forget about you I'll be fine. Because what you say doesn't matter, you're lying. And yes, I feel worthless sometimes, and i feel like I want to die, but that's because I have depression. I can't change that. You know that. But you can't hurt me if I don't let you."

I began to smile. "It's actually funny, you try so hard. Almost like you're obsessed with me. You know, I loved you so so much, I would've given you anything you wanted. When you cheated on me it broke my heart, I felt broken. But it was the best thing that ever happened to me. Besides freeing me of you it brought me to LA. And that, Liz, brought me to her."

Liz frowned. "Who? That pathetic girlfriend of yours?" I nodded. "Yeah. and that's not her name. Her name is Krism. And she's better than you'll ever be. She cares about me, she loves me, she makes me want to be a better person. Krism is my rock, my strength. She is the only one who kept me from deteriorating from your bullying. She is my soulmate."

Liz laughed in the midst of my speech. "Enough of this depression lovey dovey crap. Just go kill yourself, we'll all be better off." I laughed. "Honestly, now that I think about it, your insults are pretty pathetic. By the way if I killed myself because of this you would be facing charges of manslaughter, so don't try me."

Liz look shocked at my outburst. I turned to the left. "Krism, come here." She looked shocked as she slowly walked over to me. I turned back to Liz. "Guess what? This is what love is like, this is why I don't need you anymore. You can't hurt me. And this is Krism. I hope you remember her, she did almost break your neck the other day. Now my final thing I have to say to you is that I pity you, you're so full of hate you can't see the beauty in life."

I smiled at Krism. "Any final words?" She smirked. "Yeah, but mine are different than yours." She walked to Liz and smiled sweetly. "Burn in hell bitch." With that she swung at her, smashing her nose. I heard the crack as she went down. Liz yelled in pain and turned to us, blood running down her face.

Suddenly she didn't look so flawless, more broken maybe. She growled. "Guess what Minx, that's not love! I've spent a lot of time and energy researching that freak Krism! She's lying to you! She isn't who she says she is! Ask her how she really got that eye! Ask her about Rachel!"

With that she stood up and walked off of the stage, leaving us all speechless. I heard a single clap in the audience, which multiplied until everyone was on their feet, cheering for us. I turned to Krism, pushing Liz's remarks to the back of my head. I smiled at her, feeling a great weight lifted off of my heart.

"I did this for us, I love you Krism." Krism smiled back at me. "I love you too." But I swear I saw fear in her gaze. I leaned in, kissing her softly as the crowd cheered on. We broke apart and Katherine ran towards us. "Girls I'm so sorry about what happened! You can go back to the house, I called a car. The fans will understand!"

I nodded. "I think that's for the best." With that I turned to the audience. "I love you guys! See you later!" They cheered as Krism and I walked offstage.

I turned to Krism when we reached the backstage area. "I can't believe it! I did it! I stood up to her!" Krism nodded. "I knew you could do it. And I know we should be celebrating but I need to step outside and make a call really quickly. Wait for me and we'll go find the car."

I nodded. "Of course." Krism smiled in relief and walked out the back door, already pressing buttons on her phone. I let Liz's final words seep back into my mind. She's not who you think she is! Ask her about Rachel! Who was Rachel? I assumed Liz was lying but I had my doubts. And Krism suddenly having to make a call was a bit suspicious.

What if she was lying to me? She couldn't! She loved me! I let my curiously get the better of me and I slowly crept out the back. Krism thankfully didn't notice me, and was having a heated conversation on her cell phone. "...Liz hinted at her! She found out! How could she find out Amanda? What do I do? If Minx finds out what happened... What I did... Well, I won't be able to stand it!"

I walked out, grabbing Krism's shoulder. "You're hiding something from me, I can't get my heart broken again! Who. Is. Rachel?!"

Krism stared at me in fear, dropping her phone as her eyes widened in terror.

(A/N: very happy with this chapter. But I know one particular reader, yes Hannah I'm talking about you, who wants to know KRISMS secret. Next chapter reveals all. You'll have to wait)