Over the lunch hour, she turned on the news on the laptop. The Middle East war, terrorist attacks in Europe, the U.S. President going to China... Terrorist attacks. SEALS might be sent in for that. It would be high security but not exactly out of danger.
The front doorbell rang. Trudy's footsteps clicked across the foyer to the front door.
But the terrorist attacks hadn't been on the news before this when Jason had said to watch.
The cell phone rang. Blocked number. She snatched it up. "Jay?"
"Hello, sweetheart." He spoke very quiet, probably to not wake everyone else sleeping. "I only have until I get caught, but I wanted to make sure you're doing better after last night."
Trudy walked in with a huge bouquet of white roses. "These arrived for you, don'tcha know. I wonder who they're from." The woman winked and set the case on the desk.
A smile bloomed so wide that it hurt. Her heart melted as she stood and dug out the card. Leave it to Jason to figure out a way to be romantic and do something to make things feel a little less sad. "Ohhh, Jay, you sent roses?"
"What?" His dry retort didn't sound pleased.
Opening the card, the smile slipped away.
Consider it an olive branch for a second chance.
David Henry
"I have no way of sending you flowers. Who sent you roses?" The man sounded ready to punch someone.
"David Henry. A peace offering."
"Roses?!" Then he lowered his voice. "Damn son of a bitch sends my wife roses," he muttered in a deep growl.
A soft smile tugged. "They're just white."
"I don't care if they're weeds, he has no business sending you anything!"
"You have no reason to be jealous."
"Jealous? I'm not jealous - that'd mean punching him. I'll rip his damn head off," he grumbled. "If I was there, I'd carry you into the bedroom and... He can shove his roses where the sun don't shine."
A laugh burst out. "Jay, you know I love you."
He cleared his throat, his tone taking on a sad note. "And would you still love a soldier who, for the foreseeable future, is more likely than not to fall from your graces?"
"I wrote that email when I was upset, Jay. I'm not proud of it - "
"Neither should you be ashamed of it. It was written in a moment of truth, which needed to be released lest it fester. I ask that you remember we made a vow to always be honest with each other, no matter how painful."
"Jay? What's wrong?"
He released a deep breath. "Emma, I fear I won't be home as soon as I was promised."
"You're not in the hospital, are you?"
"No." He spoke so very quietly and seemed to hesitate.
"Will you still be home by then?" By the birth?
"I don't count on anything anymore." His voice cracked. "I can't do this. Not knowing when I'll talk to you next or when I'm coming home..." The words quivered like he might cry.
Tears burned. Now it was her turn to be strong. "Honey, it's alright. You'll be home by then. What if I record audios of my letters and send them to you each day? Then it's like we're talking."
"I won't be home for that thing coming up soon." He fell apart into quiet tears. He must mean her birthday and probably their anniversary too. "I'm missing everything."
"Hey now, we can do those when you get home." God, it was so hard to hear him this sad and homesick.
"But there is no repeat for missing more ultrasounds," he croaked.
Her heart stopped. The next beat hurt. He meant he wouldn't be home for the five-month ultrasound of the baby. He'd be gone through February yet. Even though tears fell, he needed her to be strong - he needed to be the one to fall apart right now. Brushing at her eyes, she swallowed hard. "Jay, we'll record it if you can't video chat - "
"I'm missing everything." His voice cracked.
"No, you're not. You'll be home sooner than you think. I'll keep a pregnancy video diary and send it to you every other day."
He sniffled. "Are you getting better?"
"I was able to keep a few spoonfuls of soup down at lunch. Nana makes a ginger tea that I'm able to sip. The doctor said if I'm able to keep down four cups a day, she'll stop IV fluids."
"Em," he gulped in a sob, "you can't lose the baby. I don't think they'll let me leave to be there with you."
"Oh my goodness, Jay, what happened? You're so sad."
"I thought I'd be half way done by now. It's not even close."
So he'd be gone at least through March. "Jay, listen to me. I'll send you videos every day, and I'll make OB appointments for in the mornings so maybe you can call in. The doctor wants me in every week until I'm able to eat more. I have an appointment the day after New Years at nine."
"I'll try." He sounded so devastated. A deep voice filled the background. "Em, I have to go. I love you."
"I love you. Don't be sad, Jay. We'll figure this out so its like you're here. Bye."
"Bye." He released a shakey breath and hung up.
She had to get this stress under control because it took a toll on Jason and now he was terrified of her losing the babe. The doctor said the babe was doing alright, but still...it was time to suck it up and be a soldier's wife.
She turned on the news. More wars, a bombing in the Middle East said to be done by a terrorist group, the Prime Ministers in Europe to meet, the U.S. President coming back home, the Queen of England on tour and a failed secret mission to catch an ISIS leader. Sending up a silent prayer did little to ease the fear that perhaps Jason was part of the ISIS mission.
An email came a little after midnight that evening.
My dearest love,
Forgive me for distressing you earlier. It was night here, and that's when I struggle with missing you most. Less than an hour before, I'd learned of not returning home soon and had a hard time accepting the news.
With New Years Eve just days away, the homesickness is even worse, if possible. I'd planned on taking you to a flat we own over Times Square. Yes, I just realized I've never mentioned that. That first New Years we texted, I knew I wanted to take you sometime to see the ball drop in person, and I purchased a flat as an investment, if nothing else. Do you remember when you said you were a homebody? I fell a little more in love with you while texting - it was you I meant when I said I'd prefer to spend New Year's with cuddled in bed and watch the view.
I have no signal or I would've called. Have to go. I love you.
Your loving husband,
Jay
New Years Eve morning dragged past. After his romantic email about New York, it made missing him worse than ever. But no more tears. No matter how much it hurt. No matter how much fear that he'd never come home. It took three tries to get cereal down. Sheer will power finally kept down a half cup of oatmeal.
Henrietta had fun smashing frosting on cookies in her highchair to decorate the batch that Pete had made. Trudy laughed across the kitchen table and worked on frosting some herself. Nana tried to figure out how to take pictures with her smartphone.
"Nana, let me show you." She leaned over.
"No! When I'm old you can show me. I can keep up with you whippersnappers." Then she mumbled to herself and continued to fumble through screens.
So she went back to helping Henrietta.
"Ah!"
Everyone jumped and looked at Nana.
"Got it! See, I'm a technology geek." Nana grinned and snapped a photo. "Gonna send this to JJ. How do you email it...?" Then she buried her face in the phone again.
Pete stepped in the kitchen, his face serious. He held her coat and overnight bag. "I received an email from Jason."
Shooting up so fast that the chair toppled over, she grabbed the table to steady her trembling knees. "What happened to him?"
"I don't know if anything happened to him. He only said you're to go to New York and not be worried."
"What?"
"He was specific that I'm to put you on the jet. A taxi will be waiting for you." Distress filled his eyes.
"Why?" Her hand flew to rest on the little bump. A specialist. He might've set up an appointment to see a specialist for the baby but didn't want to say yet so she wouldn't stress on the way there. "Is something wrong with the baby?"
Pete stared at the floor for a moment. "I don't know. If I didn't trust that he must have good reason, I'd be furious over him sending you alone to New York of all places."
The air crackled with tension on the ride to the airport. Her stomach twisted as she stroked the baby and stared out the window at the snow-covered mountains. "Do you think they need to run special tests to make sure the baby's alright being I can't eat much?"
"I don't know, but I don't think it's right he doesn't even tell you what's going on." Pete growled and his knuckles whitened as he gripped the steeringwheel so hard the leather creaked.
"Maybe it's really bad and he thinks it best to not tell me." She glanced at him.
His jaw muscles flexed as he ground his teeth but offered no words. This was a first seeing him angry with Jason.
"It's alright, Emmie. JJ wouldn't send you to something bad alone," Nana said from the backseat. "Don't drop me in Chicago - I'll go with you to New York."
She looked at Nana. "Thank you, but that's an awful lot of traveling. Plus, I don't know that you should be walking around New York."
Nana gave a fierce look and held up her cane. "Any dumbass punk tries to hurt my Emmie, I'll beat his ass. I'm the perfect bodyguard, Emmie - they don't expect my ninja moves. I beat up Monkeyshit, didn't I?"
Smothering a smile, she nodded. "Yes, you did."
On the plane before takeoff, Pete jerked her close and gave a bear hug. "I have half a mind to go with you, but I have to trust that he knows what he's doing. If things aren't good, you call, you hear? We'll get on the jet and shoot over. We can pick up your mother on the way."
"Okay." She gave a tight hug, needing any extra strength he could give to calm the nerves.
Then he said goodbye to Nana and got off the plane.
She sat beside Nana and typed an email.
Jay,
Why am I going to New York? Are you hurt? Is there something wrong with the baby? Nana's on the jet and said she's coming with. Pete wanted to also, but he said he'll trust that you know what you're doing.
Em
No reply for an hour - an hour of misery that led to vomiting from stress.
"Emmie, you have to stop this for the baby," Nana snapped and held her hair back in the washroom. "This is all from your head."
"What if the baby - "
"'What if' nothing! I'm asking the stewardess for a can of soup or something. I don't care if you have to tape your mouth shut, it will stay down."
It took a great deal of effort, but almost half a can of chicken noodle soup stayed down. When she sank into the seat next to Nana after another false alarm run to the bathroom, she held her head.
"She just came back from the washroom. You talk to her because she's going to throw that baby right up soon." Nana shoved the cell phone at her. "It's JJ."
She snatched the phone. "Jay? What's wrong?"
"Come alone. T - " Then the line cut off with static from a lost connection.
If New York was always busy, it was insane New Year's Eve afternoon. The taxi sat and sat and sat in traffic. A good thing Nana returned to Chicago - she'd probably insist on walking at this pace.
The taxi driver turned around in his seat after crawling another two blocks. "Here's your stop."
She blinked. "My stop? You said you had instructions to take me - "
"Lady, I was told when we got to here to kick you out of the car. Thirty bucks."
Raising her eyebrows, she gave him the money and got out in the middle of the street. The crowd on the sidewalks was so heavy that it even overflowed into the streets. She pulled out the phone to email Jason. A text message waited from a blocked number.
Walk north fifty paces when the taxi driver tells you to get out. Keep your purse inside your coat.
And then it dawned - Jason was sending her to the flat to watch the ball drop, and he'd probably call in for video chat over his lunch break to watch the ball at midnight with her. But it didn't seem like him to send her all alone to New York. Swallowing down the homesickness for him, she tucked her purse in her coat and started walking. The crowds jostled and pushed, making it hard to do anything but keep pace. And then there it was - Jason's scent. In a blink, it was gone. Turning and raising onto her toes, she scanned the heads as the crowd kept pushing her along.
A chill skittered up her back. Two words on the phone hadn't been distinct enough to know for certain it was Jason. With Nana's hearing going, it could've been any man who had called. This didn't make sense. Jason wouldn't send her alone to New York and to get out in a busy crowd like this. The phone vibrated with another text.
Go inside.
Someone watched. Looking up at the building, it was an abandoned theatre house. This definitely wasn't Jason. Panic set in. Pulling out her phone, she moved to the edge of the crowd and dialed Pete, letting them sweep her past the theatre.
"Emma?" Pete sounded stressed.
"Pete, I don't think it's Jason. I ended up at an abandoned theatre and got an anonymous text saying to go inside. Jason wouldn't do this."
"No. Stay in the crowds and keep walking. I'm picking up your cell GPS. You're a block from a police station."
"Okay." Her voice shook and she picked up speed, stepping around a dumpster sticking out of an alley. "Can - " A black figure stepped out from the corner of her eye, clamped a hand over her mouth and yanked her into the alley so fast that no one even stopped to look.
Nostrils flared with pants of panic and she struggled against the rock-hard grip locked around her arms. The twisted pervert leaned his head down near her ear and instinct took hold. A deep voice mumbled in her ear, but the panic made the words indecipherable. No, no, no. Shit. He could kill the baby. Then Jason's words came slamming back. Fight, Emma! The paralyzing fear fled, replaced with rage. Her feet scrambled to keep up with being dragged backwards and find balance to fight, so she chomped down on the glove as hard as possible. The split instant that the monster yelped in pain was all it took for him to let go, and she flung her head back into his sternum.
"Ow! God bless it, stop!"
She whirled around to knee him where it counts, but something about his voice finally registered.
He grabbed her wrists and pinned her up against the brick wall, jerking the sweatshirt hood off to leave only a ski mask. "For god's sake, I beg you, don't knee me. I was really counting on making love to you."
"Jason?" THe shock didn't really sink in.
A smile blossomed. "I'm on twenty-four hour leave. I didn't mean to frighten you. I - "
She jerked him down and crushed his mouth with a kiss.
When she came up for air, she searched his eye. "Why the secrecy?"
"We're back for just a couple days. We're allowed to go but not travel far. I can't tell you more."
Her eyes widened. "You're guarding the President on his travels, aren't you?" She kept her voice low to avoid being overheard.
"I can't tell you anything." But his eye lit up like he was relieved she finally knew.
"How long do we have?"
"Until tomorrow afternoon." He pressed a kiss to her lips and then grabbed her hand. "Come." He turned and opened a locked door of the building next to the old theatre.
She followed him up a back staircase and down a very fine hallway with thick red carpet and expensive looking lights hanging on the walls.
He stopped at a door and unlocked it. "This, my dear, is our flat to watch the ball drop tonight." He opened the door, and she stepped inside.
Large windows lined the far wall and faced Time Square. Plush ivory carpet spread across the wide floor. Beautiful, puffy red furniture adorned the living room area and opened to a kitchen with the latest appliances. The sparse furnishings left ample room for a toddler to run around. When he pulled her into the bedroom, her mouth fell open.
A large white bed sat in the middle of the room with an electric fireplace along one wall and a long antique dresser lining the other wall. The bed faced a wall of windows - perfectly romantic for New Year's Eve The view was breathtaking.
"Jay, it's beautiful." Her heart sank a little and she turned to him. "Why didn't you want to see Henrietta, though?"
He smiled. "Trudy and Pete are going to bring her this evening. I wasn't sure how fast everyone could get ready at the last minute." He slid her coat down and then shrugged off his own. "Plus," he added in a husky voice, "I needed to properly greet my wife after a month." He pulled off the ski mask and leaned down to kiss.
She caught his face in her hands and tears welled. "Just let me touch, to feel that you're really here."
Jason held tight for a few moments, the beating of his heart so gentle and comforting. After a minute, he let go and closed the drapes. "Let me see the baby." So much hope and excitement filled his eyes. When she lifted her sweater with hot cheeks to reveal the small swell, he sank to his knees and cupped her belly in his hands. "You're so beautiful, Emma," he whispered and set his lips to the babe. He stood and caught her sweater when she let it down. "I have almost five weeks to make up for. Let me see the babe awhile longer." He stepped behind and cupped her bare belly while pressing a kiss to her neck. "Are you able to eat more?"
"I kept a half can of chicken noodle soup and a half cup of oatmeal down today."
"Good girl," he purred and nibbled just below her ear. He pulled her closer against his hips.
"You're terrible, Jay." But she let him pull off the sweater and he stopped in surprise. She curled her hand up under her chin to cover up in embarrassment. "I forgot you haven't seen since the hormones really kicked in."
"You're beautiful." He shed his own shirt and wrapped his arms around, pulling her against his bare chest. "It feels like a hundred years, Em," he sighed and his eyes drifted shut, as if he missed the simple touch of her skin. His head bowed and he kissed, slowly backing up to the bed. "I love you, Emma," he whispered. "I've missed you every moment of every day. Tonight is not enough, my Emma."