Red Lightning
S4E1: I'm Back Baby, I'm Back

It was noon in Hadley Wood, and a small boy, no older than 11, was surrounded by small woodland creatures. A small rabbit was snuggled in his lap, and a small bat with a yellow stripe was perched on his shoulder.

The boy, who's name was Lucas, was reading from a book made of bark and leaves. Evident by his bohemian apparel, he had been living in the woods for a while.

"Hey friends, I'm gonna tell to a story that Dimita here wrote." Lucas said, pointing to the bat.

"Long ago, before humans were born, three legends walked the planet. One, the blue legend, was a preserver, protecting the creations of the yellow legend, the creator, from the red legend. the destroyer."

"One day, the blue being and the red being had a battle. The red wanted to destroy the humans, and the blue tried to stop him. The yellow being tried to stop them, and they all fell down. A piece of one of the legends fell to earth, and with, a lightning storm happened, and imbued humanity with all the wonders of The Three Legends."

It was early in the morning, and Peach Creek Community Centre, and Sally was sitting outside it in a home made Lemonade Booth with the words "Luv Poshun" scribbled above it in crayon.

A tall, dark haired man pulled up the kiddie stool and squatted in front of the booth.

"Hey kid." The guy said. "You got a fresh batch?"

"Sure thing sir!" Sally beamed, as she bent over and a tray of small, purple bottles, filled with fruit juice mixed in with her "Love Spores" to make a love potion.

Well, it wasn't really a love potion in the traditional sense. It was more of "Sexual-Magnetism-In-A-Bottle" type deals. If you drank a bottle of the stuff, then the opposite gender would find themselves unable to resist the drinker.

"So, this is the good stuff, huh?" The man asked, inspecting a bottle.

"Oh yes Mister. It contains Super-Psycho powers. It'll work like charm!" Sally said, eagerly.

The man smiled. He took a bottle and places it in his pocket. "How much?"

"One DollarPound please!" Sally said with a smile.

The man smiled and gave Sally a DollarPound coin. "Deal." He said. And with that he walked away.

This man is named Marv Aul. He is thirty six years old, of Cuban decent, and works as a teacher of Journalism at Peach Creek highschool. With this love potion, he is potentially the most attractive man on the planet, and he has a taste for school girls, and he has malevolent intentions.

Double-D had spent a good deal of time in is room that week.

Since his adventure with Jimmy and Ace, he had a lot to catch up on. His friends at filled him in. Turns out Eddy & Finn were as out of the loop as he was, having been "Time Coma'd" by his initial leap through time.

He had been effectively dead to the world for about a month. His parents didn't even know he was gone. His dad was away in a military, and his mother ran a huge corporation in the American side of the U.K.A.

However, he was only concerned with one person. The girl he left behind without even saying goodbye.

Marie.

He looked at his watch, then at his clock. All that time travel had rendered his watch so out of sync it was worthless, so he just looked at the clock. School started in 30 minutes. Marie's trailer was 40 minutes away, and school was at hour away on foot. He smiled.

Bags of time.

Ed, Eddy & Finn were sitting at the bar, the two Ed's ready to go back to school, but all three were shocked by the sudden gust of wind inside the Bounce.

Marie pulled herself out of bunk when she heard the doorbell to her trailer. She went downstairs and, being sure she had a dressing gown on, opened the door.

It was Double-D.

Marie was stunned, briefly blinded and deafened by the shock she was experiencing.

"Marie…" Double-D started, but was stopped when Marie shoved her palm in front of his face, and looked the other way.

"Save it." She said, tears trickling out of her eyes. "Save it because I just got over this bull! OK!" Marie snapped.

She turned her head to look at him. "Look, if you're a ghost, or robot, or a clone who thinks he's the original, fine, I can deal. But if you're some kind of Shapeshifter, or some sick memory illusion thingy, then that is NOT COOL!" She shouted, and slammed the door. However, Double-D was already inside before the door slammed.

"Marie, I'm the real-deal." Double-D said. Marie's face lit up with a glimmer of hope, but she quickly beat that emotion backwards.

"But you can't be!" Marie said, trying not to sound furious. "You were vaporised!"

"I wasn't!" Double-D explained. "I was sent back in time. I spend weeks bouncing from Timezone to Timezone, and the only thing that kept me working faster than ever, it wasn't Super Speed. It was the idea that you're still waiting for me."

Marie looked Double-D in the eye, and looked into his soul the way only two people who were very much in love can. And she knew he was telling the truth.

"Marie, I missed you s.." Double-D began, but was interupted by Marie pressing her lips against his.

Marie used her superior strength to move her taller boyfriend to the sofa, where she forced him down by leaning her bulk into him. The two never broke the kiss for that.

Ten minutes past and Double-D finally broke the lip-lock.

"Y'know, I've been all over the world from start to finish, and nothing ever compared to you." Double-D said as he caressed her blue fringe. Marie gasped slightly as Double-D blurred out and appear behind her. They rolled slightly until Marie was now sitting on Double-D's lap.

"And one other thing," Double-D said, as he placed his left hand on her belly. He planted a kiss on her neck, before moving his mouth to her ear.

"We call him Ace." He whispered.

Marie looked down at the spot on her belly Double-D was rubbing, and instantly knew what he meant. She blushed, but then replaced it with a coy smile.

Marie rolled over and now she and Double-D were facing each-other. She placed her hands underneath his t-shirt, and began to rub his chest.

Marie gave him a cat-smile as she moved one hand towards the downstairs area.

"Hmm, is that a sonic screwdriver in you're pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" Marie said.

Double-D looked at Marie's clock. School started in ten minutes. It could take him seconds to make it, but…

"F ck it. I've been dead to the world for a month, one more day won't hurt." Double-D said to himself as he resumed his kiss with Marie.

Eddy & Ed had arrived at school, Eddy had been dropped off in Hector's Car. Ed & Pinkie Pie had ridden in on Ed's motorcycle.

Ed & Eddy were wearing their casual get-up, while Pinkie Pie was on Ed's shoulder, wearing a sailor suit.

"Oh my gob! My first day of school!" Pinkie Pie gasped. "I'm so nervou-cited!"

"I hope you know that's not a real word, right?" Eddy said to Pinkie Pie. He then turned to his taller companion. "And anyway, are you sure is allowed to go to school?"

Ed grinned. "Oh sure. They made it mandatory for schools to accept Super-Psychos as well."

"But she ain't a Super-Psycho." Eddy pointed out.

"Yeah, but who's to know." Ed grinned. He liked acting shifty, having put great amounts of time into learning how to do it right.

"Whatever." Eddy sighed. The three began to walk to the entrance, only to stop and stare at the source of a very loud voice.

"DAMN YOU CONNER!"

It was Sadie, who had evidently been dressed up nicely for her first day of school, but in all likelihood it was probably that Conner & Cameron had dressed up Sadie in her sleep. She had been dressed in a sailor suit and had an enormous pink bow at the back of her neck. She looked positively adorable! And incredibly angry.

"Now now," Conner said, trying to keep the smirk off his face. "You'd want to be pretty on your first day of middle school."

"Yeah," Cameron chuckled. "Don't you wanna kiss us goodbye!"

As the two idiots broke down in laughter, Sadie's eyes began to glow indigo.

"CAMERON! GET CONNER!" Sadie commanded. Cameron's owlly expression changed so it resembled a vacant, gormless idiot.

He squawked loudly and dove underground. Conner knew he was in trouble and ran for the hills, a trail of overturned earth following him.

Sadie chuckled sadistically, and then shot a deathly glare at anybody who was staring.

"Good morning class, welcome to Media; Journalism. My name is Mr. Aul, and I will be your teacher for the year."

Mr. Aul looked at his class. About 20 students. Five human boys, four human girls. Two Super-Psycho girls, seven Super-Psycho boys, two Gargoyle boys.

He smiled, as he took the small bottle out of his pocket, and poured it in his mug of coffee.

"Shall we begin then?" He smiled as he downed the mug. He pointed to a girl. Her name was Lucy, and she looked like an anthropomorphic Triceratops. "Lucy, can you tell me two social and legal responsibilities a reporter has?"

Lucy looked like she was about to answer, but was stopped dead in her tracks. As she looked at Mr. Aul's face, cartoonish hearts replaced her eyes.

"Uh…um…I don't know sir." Lucy said.

"Right, see me during break." Mr. Aul said, as he sat down. Lucy nodded furiously with a weird smile on her face.

Eddy leaned over to Ed. "Yikes, he's strict." Eddy said. Ed nodded.

"Monica, can you tell me the answer?" Mr. Aul asked, facing the other Super-Psycho girl who had prehensile hair. Just like Lucy before her, Monica was overcome by Mr. Aul.

"Um, I don't know either, sir." Monica said, blushing.

"During break, then." Mr. Aul said, not even looking up from his textbook.

He asked all of the girls, and some of the boys. All the girls ended up seeing him during break.

Eddy met Jamie in the canteen. As usual, shedder using her big fat paycheck from Building 7 to stuff her face.

"Hey Jamie," Eddy said as he pulled up a chair in front of her.

Jamie mumbled something incoherently, her mouth still full, but then she swallowed, and was allowed to speak more clearly.

"Oh, Hi Eddie, how are ya doin'?" Jamie asked.

"Fine, you?" Eddy asked.

"Ah'm fine, thanks fer askin'" Jamie replied. "So, how's yer first day?"

"Well, it's really weird. My Journalism Teacher is, like, insanely hot, and he looks at the girls like a hobo looks at a freshly baked cookie. He's keeping them back at break time right now in fact."

"Wow, an' here Ah thought sitting next to a giant cockroach was interesting." Jamie said.

"Oh wow, Kafka goes here?" Eddy said, his ears perking up.

"Eddie, focus!" Jamie said, snapping her fingers in front of his face. "I was thinkin' 'bout that teacher ya mentioned. Ah think he's a wrong 'un!"

"Come off it Jamie, he'd never get past school security if he was a Pedo!" Eddy said. He fumbled about inside his pocket, before grunting and slamming his fist on the table.

"Darn, I left my mobile phone in class." Eddy said. He got up to walk back to class, while Jamie turned to the camera.

"Ah hope yer payin' attention. Eddy's conveniently fergotton his mohbile phone. This means he's gonna see somethin' he shouldn't!" Jamie explained, and then resumed eating.

Pinkie Pie skipped merrily down the corridor. Her catering teacher was impressed by baking prowess, and predicted "a great year" for her.

Ed wasn't kidding when he said School was fun. She had already made tons of friends. There was even this really moody giant cockroach boy who said she was his friend now, and apparently he didn't make friends with anyone.

Pinkie Pie was so lost in thought that she wasn't looking where she was going and *WHAM* trotted right into another student, causing Pinkie Pie to fall on her rump.

"OW!" The other voice said. "Hey watch it!"

"Sorry." Pinkie Pie said, rubbing her eyes.

"Yeah, whatever." The other one said, she rubbing her eyes also.

The eye rubbing ceased and the two finally got a good look at eachother.

"Oh my glob! You're a pony!" Pinkie Pie said.

"Um, yeah," The Pony said. She stuck her hoof out to shake Pinkie Pie's. "I'm Vinyl, Vinyl Scratch."

Pinkie Pie quickly took Vinyl into a hug, much to the new pony's surprise.

"Oh this is just great! I knew there were others like me! Where did you come from?" Pinkie asked as she released Vinyl from her grip.

"That guy drew me." Vinyl explained, as she pointed to the same guy who brought Pinkie into existence. He gave them both a brief smile before he resumed shaking his sketch pad, resulting in several grocery items to fall out.

Pinkie Pie looked at her animator, gave him a wave, and turned back to Vinyl.

"So, you wanna be best friends forever now?" She asked in a typical Pinkie Pie manner.

"Sure," Vinyl said with a smile. The two bumped rumps and trotted to next class. Music.

Eddy was walking towards his journalism class, only to be stopped at the door. Eddy could see quite clearly through the little window, and inside the room was Mr. Aul, doing things he probably shouldn't be doing with girl he kept back at break.

"Oh man! This is just like Debra Lafave!" Eddy gasped. (Look her up people! Women mustn't get away with sexual crimes because they're women!) This sudden outburst alerted Mr. Aul and the girls, who all looked at him at the same time, turning their heads in synchronisation, creating a really eerie effect.

"Get him." Mr. Aul said calm. Monica grunted loudly as her hair whipped forward, forming a large hand and forcing Eddy up against the wall.

"Oh poopy." Eddy moaned.

Meanwhile, outside the Peach Creak community centre, Conner having a nice morning stroll. In one hand he had a bottle of diet coke and in the other he had half a Curly Wurly.

"Hiya Mister!" Sally yelled as she waved at Conner.

Conner, friendly as ever, waved back. He walked over to Sally's stall and bent over to look her in the face. She didn't sound human, so Conner warmed up to her quickly.

"Well hello there little girl," Conner cooed, fawning over Sally's adorableness. "Are you selling lemonade today?"

"Nope." Sally replied. "I'm selling Love Potions!"

Sally bent over and produced a bottle of liquid. "If you drink it, girls will be overcome with lust for you. So much that you can cause multiple orgasms by sitting on the same sofa as a woman."

"Soooo, it's a date rape drug?" Conner questioned. "And any, how do you know what an orgasm is? You 9!"

"Yeah…" Sally drew out, not really comfortable with the conversation now.

Conner stood up and walked away. He was no longer associating with her.

Ed was walking down the hallway to his next class. He was lost in thought. With all the Super-Psycho's about, Ed was finding it even harder to not be jealous.

"Face it Ed," Ed muttered to himself. "You lucked out. Double-D & Eddy are big time superheroes now. And I'm just the Fanboy they can't seem to shake."

All Ed's life he wanted to superpowers, and he missed the golden opportunity. Ed sighed. It wasn't worth complaining about now.

"Hey big guy,"

Ed turned to see two people lurking in the corridor. They were both Super-Psychos, obviously. The girl had four arms, and the forearms of her first pair were massively inflated. Matter of fact, she looked like a Generator Rex character that Ed can't remember.

The bloke was taller, and his main feature was a scarf that was tightly wrapped around his neck and mouth, presumably to hide some deformity.

Ed looked around to see if they might have been addressing somebody else. With nobody around, Ed pointed to himself and watched as the boy nodded, and walked over.

"What do you want?" He asked, confused.

"Are you jealous of Super-Psychos?" The boy asked, his eyebrow raised.

Ed looked a bit dumbstruck. How did this guy know? "Uh…"

"Sonika, hand me the goods." The boy said, holding out his hand.

"Here's you goes Mike," Sonika said, in a really thick Spanish accent, and a little bit of broken English.

"Indubitably," Mike said, using the word well out of context, as if he didn't know what it actually meant.

Mike dangled a small orb in front of Ed's face. It looked like a gobstopper, only it was luminous.

"This is SPB." Mike explained. "Just one of these suckers is enough to give the powers you would've gotten from the storm for, what, a day maybe. Two if you really take to it. You can be a Super-Psycho just like the rest of us."

Ed looked hesitant as he stared at the pill. Superpowers. What he always wanted. He could be a hero and get his two best friends back! But…Ed knew if he took the SPB it would all end in tears.

Ed was snapped out of his thoughts when Sonika pulled his hand out and Mike placed the pill inside his hand, then scrunched his hand up tight.

"First sample's free. If you like what you get, I'm always here." Mike smiled as he turned Ed around and patted his back, motioning him to be on his way.

Ed walked off, staring intently at the pill.

"COME HERE!" Lucy screamed, as she charged at Eddy, head first. Eddy dodged it, and the Triceratops Girl broke the wall down as she ploughed through it.

Eddy ran towards the boys toilet, desperate for a place to "Iron Up". Unfortunately, a tentacle of hair wrapped around his legs, and pulled him back towards Monica.

Monica threw Eddy into the air and her hair morphed into an axe, ready to slice the midget. Eddy screwed his eyes shut, ready for the blow.

Eddy opened his eyes to see Ed standing in front of him. With a forcefield!

"Ed?" Eddy gasped in disbelief.

"Not now Eddy," Ed said as he disabled the Force Field. He picked up Eddy and tucked him under his arm. Ed then jumped in the air, and began to fly out of the Media Studies Department.

"Ed, you can fly?!" Eddy asked in astonishment.

"Less talking!" Ed yelled as he flew to the boys toilets, and tossed Eddy inside. "You need to Iron Up, I'll hold them off."

Ed flew back into the fray. Lucy attempted to ram him with her horns, only for Ed to conjure his force field, and knocking her backwards.

Quarterback broke through the wall behind Lucy, and grabbed both her arms. He hoisted the pheromone crazed girlie above his head, and hurled her into the wall in front of him.

"That seems a bit excessive." Ed said.

"That was for not going to the prom with me in year nine." Eddy grunted.

Suddenly, hairy black tentacles wrapped themselves around Quarterback's wrists, and yanked him onto the ground. Ed took off and followed the hair back to it's source. Monica. Monica saw him coming and sent several strands of hair towards him, probably with the intent of skewering him.

Ed conjured a force field, and rammed into Monica, forcing her into a wall and creating an audible crunch as Monica left a human shaped imprint in the wall. Monica's hair followed her, and with it, Quarterback was pulled in through the wall, still tangled in a mess of hair.

All the human girls in the room quickly cowered behind Mr. Aul. Ed helped Eddy up, and the two Super Humans moved forward ominously.

Mr. Aul grabbed Julie, the smallest girl, out of the ground and pulled her into his grip. He then pulled a knife from his pocket, and held it to Julie's face.

"Take a step and I'll blind her." Mr. Aul said. Julie was so entranced by Mr. Aul that she failed to realise the situation.

"Woah," Ed said. "That doesn't look too friendly. Why don't you give that to me." Ed took a step forward, causing Mr. Aul to flinch.

"I WILL STAB HER IN THE EYE!" Mr. Aul screamed. The girls began to look frightened, clearly the potion was wearing off. Little Julie was actually trying to get away from her teacher.

Ed backed off, but Eddy stood his ground. He turned to Ed.

"Ed, when I give the signal, I want you to fly over to those girls and force field them, oh, and we are still gonna talk about how you can do that!"

Ed's raised his fist, spooking Mr. Aul. Eddy roared and slammed his fist into the floor, creating a small tremor.

"NOW ED!"

The rooms integrity gave out and began to collapse. Ed flew past Mr. Aul, grabbed Julie, and shielded the other girls.

However, Mr. Aul was not given this protection, and falling rubble ploughed him into the ground, knocking him unconscious. Ed looked at Eddy.

"Come on, we gotta go!" Ed yelled.

"Well what are we waiting for?" Eddy said as he plucked Mr. Aul out of the rubbish, and ran through a wall, creating a hole for Ed and the girls to escape through.

Mr. Aul had been stripped naked, placed in The Parks football stadium (Yeah, that's still there). He had been held on the ground with tent pegs, gagged, and had "I drug & rape girls" scribbled on his chest in felt tip pens.

Ed sighed as he looked at his handiwork from the cheap-seats. He sighed, and fished something out of his pockets. It was the SPB wrapper. He swallowed an amount of spit.

"What have I done?"

[Next Time on Red Lightning]

The newscaster looked very excited. "I present to you, all the way from Japan, Miku Hatsune!"

"Y'know, you ponies look awfully…tasty."

Yumi smiled. "You know what Conner, chocolate sounds really good right about now."