Chapter 25: Trust is More than an Emotion

Ever since their conversation about surviving a few days ago, Ellie had seemed to clam up. He didn't know if it was because of the cold or what, but it was starting to somewhat bother him.

Joel had to admit that Ellie was starting to become more than just a travelling companion to him, almost like family when he thought about it sometimes.

She kept glancing at him several times a day, and with nothing hostile interrupting their journey for the past few days, there was only talking that could pass the time; problem was that neither of them seemed to want to talk much.

So that only left Joel with planning out more of their trip. He was starting to realize a flaw in his original plan: heading through Nebraska and then towards California.

With the time of year that they were going to be getting to Nebraska in, the weather would most likely be winter, changing drastically from what both of them were prepared for.

He originally thought of steering clear of Nebraska and changing their course to Oklahoma, where the weather wouldn't be quite as hostile, but then he remembered hearing rumors of the state being overrun by hunters.

So it's either choose between hostile nature or hostile men, Joel thought with a sigh, both can kill just as easily.

He decided to stick with their original plan; there was always a possibility that they would avoid the nasty winter storms after all.

But that's the problem with it drastically changing…

Joel remembered before the outbreak that he had visited Nebraska once; he couldn't remember what it was for, but the weather hadn't been too friendly.

His gaze traveled to Ellie and he observed that she was staring at the ground as she walked. He sometimes found himself wondering what went through her mind; after all, they both had completely different experiences.

He sighed, figuring he should at least say something to pass the time.

"Would you rather go through hostile weather, or hostile people?" he asked, his question completely surprising her. She let out a small laugh, smiling a bit.

"What kind of question is that?" she asked, and then continued as she stared up at the sky, "I don't know. You're the one with more experience."

Ellie didn't say anything for the rest of the day after that, making him realize his attempt had failed horribly.

He stopped their traveling a bit early for the day as they came to a ruined hut; the sky had just started to darken.

Joel sat his backpack down, leaning it against a crumbled wall. Ellie sat down a few feet away without saying anything.

He sighed, seeing the same unreadable expression on her face.

"What's bothering you so much?" he asked as he sat down.

Her face was surprised for a moment, and he could tell she hadn't been expecting him to talk.

"Nothing much, just thinking," her gaze traveled to the ground again.

He sighed, and then laughed a bit.

"Well, that's been your excuse every time I've asked, so you need to find a new one," he stated, watching as she frowned slightly.

"Just something more personal," she answered as she looked up at the sky.

Dread somewhat filled him at the first thing that popped into his mind.

"You don't mean-" he started, but Ellie caught on, her eyes widening.

"No!" she retaliated quickly, then calming down a bit, "Something else that's been on my mind for a while."

"I can tell," he said, lying on his back and staring up at the sky. Ellie did the same, taking her backpack off and laying it next to her.

She sighed and he glanced over at her.

"You're still avoiding answering my question," he saw her glance over at him, and then sit up, reaching for her backpack.

He sat up as well, watching as she pulled something rectangular and dirty from her backpack.

She handed it to him, and he saw it was a letter. Strange thing was that the letter was unopened.

He frowned slightly, seeing only that 'Ellie' was written on the front.

"Why haven't you opened it?" he questioned, motioning towards the letter.

Ellie sighed, lying back down with a frown. She didn't answer for a moment, and he could tell that she was thinking.

"I don't know. Some part is out of fear, I guess," her answer made him somewhat confused.

Joel lied back down, looking up at the sky.

"What are you scared about?" he asked, hearing her take a deep breath.

"The unknown?" she answered uncertainly, "I guess I'm just afraid to know what's inside."

Joel listened intently as she continued.

"That letter just appeared on my doorstep one day, back in Boston. I have no idea who sent it. I guess that some part of me is afraid to find out."

He let out a deep breath, contemplating what she had told him. Something was stirring in his memory as he looked over at her.

"You have some idea?" he questioned, and she nodded.

"Maybe it's just a random person who sent it. Maybe I got someone else's letter, I don't know," Ellie stopped for a moment, and Joel saw her close her eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath, "Sometimes I think it might be my parents."

Her gaze drifted towards the sky again, and Joel was really hoping she wouldn't cry.

"I guess I never really know where my opinion lies with that subject. I've never really had parents; none of the other kids at the boarding school did anyways, so I guess that's why we were there. I just don't know what to think."

They sat in silence for a few moments; he didn't really know how to comfort her. Of course, he had parents at one time, but he couldn't really remember much about them considering he hadn't seen them since before the pandemic.

"Anyone else?" he asked, motioning towards the letter again. She took another deep breath, nodding.

"Yeah. Sometimes I think it might be Riley."

"You keep mentioning that name."

He glanced over at her, and she caught his gaze for a moment before it flitted to the sky again.

"She was another kid at one of the boarding schools."

Joel shook his head, smiling a bit.

"There's something else," a confused look appeared on her face at his statement, and he continued, "You remember her name for a reason. It's not like you could tell me the names of every other kid there."

Ellie laughed a bit, and he felt somewhat relieved.

"You're right; I couldn't tell you the names of every other kid, but…" her voice trailed off and she shook her head, "I don't think I'm ready to talk about her yet. Sorry."

Joel nodded, his gaze drifting.

"Don't worry. I understand what you mean," he sighed, shaking his head, "some memories of people are more complicated."

Ellie stayed quiet, not commenting on his statement. It was then that Joel realized she hadn't asked for the letter back.

"Here," he tried to give it back to her, but she shook her head.

"Keep it," she stated, making him sit up a bit.

"Trying to lighten your load?" His question made her laugh a bit.

"No, but I'd feel more comfortable if you have it," she explained, not making him understand any more.

"How come?" he asked, watching her sit up as well. Ellie thought for a moment, sitting in silence.

"I don't think I'm ready for whatever's in that letter," she stated, and then pointed to him, "but I'd feel better if you read it first."

Joel felt surprise run through him as he stared down at the letter.

"I'm thinking it might be more of a personal letter," he wanted to make sure she was thinking correctly.

"Yeah, but I trust you more than most people," she answered, repeating what he had said to her a few days ago.

He briefly smiled, reaching for his backpack. Ellie saw this and looked confused.

"Aren't you going to read it?" she asked, tilting her head to the side a bit as she stared at him. Joel shook his head.

"Not now. Maybe when the time is right," he answered, opening his backpack as she lied back down.

"Alright then," she fell silent after that.

Joel slipped his fingers between the lining of his backpack pocket, opening the part where the vaccines were hidden. He glanced down at the letter, placing it with the vaccines and replacing the lining.

Joel turned around, opening his mouth to say something, but stopped when he saw that Ellie was already fast asleep.

The corners of his mouth twitched into a smile; she never really did tell him when she was exhausted.

Because she doesn't need babysitting, he reminded himself, trying not to laugh for fear of waking her up.

He glanced at his backpack as he positioned himself on the ground, and then stared up at the stars, staying up long into the night.

So, this chapter was in Joel's POV (personally, I did not originally plan to write his POV this often, but I'm starting to like it a bit). The past two chapters have mentioned the letter that Ellie grabbed in Chapter 1, but we won't see the contents for a few more chapters. Sorry, but that contains some spoilers (and I don't want to spoil anything too early in the story). Only a few more weeks until the game comes out, and hopefully this with be done by then (so that all of you readers can enjoy playing the game without getting a notice that I updated every five minutes :) ). Also, I was wondering what your opinion would be on something; do you want the epilogue of this fanfiction on June 13th or 14th (this also depends on how fast I get the chapters done, but I would like to know your opinion). Either way, please tell me what you thought in a review!

-AnimeWolfGirl9