Blossoming Burnt Petals

By Ayesha Raees

Chapter twenty five

Alibi

I am not lying

Because it's wrong to do so

So please understand

That beneath this demeanor

Really lives a caring heart

His embrace was just perfect; warm and soft, full of feelings and gentleness that seemed to seep into my soul and my body. If I had the choice, I would have stayed like that forever; warm in his gentle embrace.

But the reality hit me hard and, sadly, too early for me to fully enjoy the moment. Even though I pushed him gently away and he flinched at my sudden resistance, he didn't let go of me, openly choosing ignorance over my meaningful gestures. Maybe, deep down, he too knew that such an offer was impossible for me to accept.

So I, too, played ignorant and asked questions that I knew I had to in order to open up his eyes and close my eager heart.

"Wh-what do you mean?"

"I want you to stay with me from now on,"

His answer was so in the clouds. As though clinging to me and saying such sweet words would make me stay with him. It was like he was the child and wanted his way even though I knew that he had probably experienced horrible things to be not one. It was like a whine of a child in need. A thought of a child who assumed that his wish will always be granted because he loved his mother and vice versa too much.

But for me, life wasn't like that. For me, love and protection were things of fantasy and wishes to be daydreamed of. For me, reality was much more real. For me, the responsibility of family was so much more than a wish of a boy who wanted to protect me.

"I-I can't,"

I am sorry Sasuke.

His body went stiff and he looked at me with the saddest expression that I have ever seen on his face. My heart fluttered and I wanted to cry out but right now, I was not in the position to do so.

"Why? Didn't you say that you would be happy if I protected you?"

I felt a lump in my throat.

But that was because I thought it was someone else and not me. Someone like Sakura. Someone you love.

"Th-that was different,"

"No it's not! It's simple. I want to protect you and in order to do so; you don't go back to your house!"

He seemed pissed off. Angry. Venomous.

"I c-can't run away Sasuke!"

He was probably taken aback at the power of what I had said coupled up with his name and he remained silent suddenly as though waiting for me to say more… to startle him more… to break his childish thinking.

"I appreciate what you are trying to do, but… but I can't accept it. Even though my father abuses me an-and hits me… he is still my father!"

He frowned deeply, anger radiating from him in such waves that I felt scared of being beneath him. He was staring at me down when he perched himself on top of me, putting me in such a weak position to stand up to myself and yet I knew, my head was right and my heart needed to be silent.

"What kind of reasoning is that! That man doesn't love you! He hits you and abuses you! And you rather be with him than with me?"

"Please don't compare yourself with him! He is my father!"

"Than what am I to you?"

Why Sasuke… are you trying to make this so difficult for me?

I was looking at me with hurtful tearful eyes and yet, he still held me back, wanting to know an answer to such a question. A question that I wasn't able to answer in such a moment. Such a complicated question.

"Answer me!" He pressed me, wanting to know.

"Y-you are the same to me that I am to you,"

What do you consider me as Sasuke? A friend? A savior? Or really nothing. We just met at a church and we hardly talk in school. Really… who are we to each other?

"What kind of an answer is that you moron," he growled under his breath and I stared as he impatiently grinded his teeth in frustration. A feeling of uneasy enveloped me.

For a minute, I was scared to hear what he was going to say next. What he was going to reveal from his heart. It truly was fright. I didn't want to hear it. Not in this situation.

Not like this.

"Sasuke,"

My voice was stable and I was determined to silence him by changing the topic. Even though it meant trouble for me.

"I am sorry. I can't stay,"

His bangs hid half of his face and all I could see was the grind of his teeth. His pale face was twisted into an expression of fury and irritation. As though things weren't going the way he wanted.

If the situation was different, I would have enjoyed knowing more about him and seeing his different expressions. Yet… his silence was eating me alive now and my chest was screaming in pain.

"I have a family. I-I need to be there. E-Even though they d-don't treat me r-right… i-it's ok. It's ok," I whispered, my voice failing me, "It's ok,"

It was like I was reassuring myself more than solving the situation. Like those words were giving me strength to face the darkness of a home rather than giving strength to Sasuke whose face looked more and more painful every passing second.

"It's ok Sasuke… I will be fine. S-So please don't worry about me any longer,"

He snapped.

It was the first time I had seen him like that. His head jerked straight and his bangs fell back. His eyes were hard and cold but boiling with such anger that a red tint came up into his black orbs. His hands, which were gently grasping mine a few moments ago, tightened roughly, his nails digging into my skin without a second though and pain shot through my body, making me close my eyes shut and gasp a little. Tears threatened to come but I tried to fight them back.

I thought that this might have been punishment but what came next truly broke me inside out.

"I hate you. I fucking hate you,"

The words were not loud but they were not gentle either. They cut through me like daggers cutting through water and I felt my body go stiff as my shoulders contracted as my scared broken eyes stared back at him. Inside me, there was a war going on and my heart seemed to be ripped apart.

"People like you… who don't care if other people are worrying about you… want to help you… put all their fucking efforts of fucking care… they make me sick,"

The way he said that, it really made me sick of myself too.

"I-,"

"You are a coward!"

I know…

"You are apathetic!"

I know…

"You are the WORST KIND OF HUMAN BEING EVER!"

SLAP!

Blurred eyes and the stinging feeling of pain as it contacted with his face made me feel like drowning me into a world of pain that I had become so accustomed to. The impact silenced and froze him stiff and my vision became even more blurred.

I had pushed him from above me and I was already at the door. I didn't even feel the supposed coldness of the door's knob on my hand as I touched to get out. It was even a surprise when a voice came out of my mouth as though nothing had happened before. The voice, for a minute, I couldn't understand.

"You are just like my father, Uchiha-san. Why would I be with you when you are not even my blood? We have no ties whatsoever,"

As I walked blindly towards my house, the wounds on my wrists and the clotted blood in the cuts glistened venomously under the stars.

For a moment, through my crying eyes, I saw a golden streak crease across the sky and I knew it at once that it was a shooting star… but I didn't eve bother to make a wish. What can a fantastical virtual wish can do when real humans and destiny was not able to?

Save me… my ass.

Definitely the ass. :p :p

yeah for complicated relationships and lover quarrels. :p. This story will now be updated more quickly and thus finished soon. Than i shall concentrate on my other stories. lol. :p