Stephenie Meyer owns any Twilight characters and Twilight plot lines that may appear in this story. The remainder is my original work. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without my express written authorization. Don't steal, it isn't polite.
Attention: There is bloodplay in this chapter...cuz it's a vampfic, ya know?
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
***EPOV***
I leaned against the windowsill, watching my human girl sleep for what had been the better part of an hour. It was still fascinating to me, how fragile she was, how feeble her bones were and yet she had the power to cripple me with nothing more than her words.
It had been three weeks since we abruptly left Forks, her father, and the wolves that could have possibly been our allies had circumstances been different. There was nothing for us to feel regretful about when it came to Quileutes. They had always deemed themselves our enemies, and even though we tried to remain as neutral as possible in our opinions regarding the shape-shifters, we certainly had no qualms with them continuing to be our enemy.
Bella and I had been well aware that the life we were living in Forks was only temporary. Our passion was wreaking havoc on her body, and her destiny to become a vampire was becoming as much of a need as a want as the days went on. That night, weeks ago when she came to me with her theory, so incredibly convinced that I could be the one to change her…I had never felt more a part of this universe than in that moment.
At first I was disbelieving of the possibility. My mind wandered back to years ago when I had attempted to change Rosalie and failed miserably. But the fact that Bella was being injected with my venom daily was an intriguing thought. If my venom was merely weak as Carlisle and Bella had suspected, then maybe Bella and I could have everything we dreamed of after all.
As much as I wanted to be the one to make her unbreakable, the waiting game was becoming unbearable. If either one of us would have been willing to let Carlisle change her, she could have been a vampire by now. There would be no threat of me ending her life by breaking her bones or taking too much blood; our biggest challenge as a family at this point would have been to support Bella as she endured the hardships of a newborn.
But to know that for the rest of my life, I could gaze upon my mark on her neck and know that she was my mate forever because of my venom…well, we both desperately needed it to happen if it was realistically possible. And judging by Bella's enhancements within the last few weeks, I had more and more hope that it was.
The first development happened about a week after we had first relocated to Wyoming.
We were…vehemently fucking…there's truly no other way to describe it. Something snapped in both of us, and we needed each other so fucking badly we couldn't contain it. I was ready to destroy…and so was Bella. We were growling and desperate and I was barely hanging onto my self-control by a thread. I was plunging inside of her harder than I ever had before, and the taste of what it would be like once I could finally let go had me irresponsibly testing my limits with her body. The ignoble part of me reasoned that even if I took it too far, Carlisle was there to save her.
Thinking back, it was a shameful idea to even entertain, but honestly, we had never been that far gone before.
She screamed uncontrollably and begged me to drink from her; I was more than happy to oblige. I clumsily attacked her, my teeth dragging up the column of her neck and opening her for me wider than ever before…her blood was rushing out of her so fast, so fucking fast and we had never been more self-destructive than in that moment. I took a deep pull from her artery and then gripped her neck as tightly as I safely could, pressing against the wound with my fingers. My mouth was covered in blood as I hungrily attacked hers.
She had always loved tasting her blood, and this time was no different…she tasted it slowly, enjoying the warmth and the pleasure it gave her. I let her take her flavor from me, transferring it to her by our heated kiss and frantic, tangling tongues. I nearly came right then when her eyes met mine.
They were almost foreign to me as she stopped undulating above me, frozen to the spot as I watched her swallow down the warmth of her own blood. She shook, her eyes becoming unfocused and entirely dilated as she began whimpering my name. She crawled up my body and fought desperately to remove my hand from her neck, pleading with me to give her more as her enjoyment quickly turned to obsession.
I was so far gone that my rationality barely fought its way through the monster's red haze. But as she frantically pleaded with me to let her feed on her own blood, I knew there was something more happening in that moment. "I need to fucking drink, Edward! Please let me drink…fuck, please!"
If she had the strength of a newborn, I would have been flung across the room in an instant. The bed would have been destroyed and the sheets nothing more than scraps. It was bloodlust in its purest form, and it was frightening and fascinating all at once. I was too unhinged to try and bring her back, considering it was downright impossible to even bring myself back. Instead I grabbed the back of her neck and let her suck my tongue, giving her remnants of the blood that resided there moments ago.
When that no longer satisfied her, I held her to me until she looked into my eyes, willing myself one more moment of control until I could once again fuck her like the vampire she craved. "Bella, you'll get one more taste and then we're going to figure out what's happening. It feels different, doesn't it?"
She swallowed thickly and nodded, sliding her dripping pussy along my cock with a languid swirl of her hips. God, I needed to get back in. "I need it almost as much as I need you. I have to taste it, you have to give it to me, Edward."
"One taste, beloved," I whispered against her lips, her tongue reaching out to lap my mouth. "One more taste and that's it. Do you understand? One more taste and you get my cock. I'll fuck you so good that blood will be the last thing on your mind, Isabella."
My teeth found Bella's neck one more, and I moaned as her warm succulence filled my mouth. Knowing that it was for her to drink only heightened the experience, making me feel exhilarated and impatient for what was to come in our hopefully immediate future. I fed her more than I ever had before, and she eagerly took her last indulgence from my mouth as I let it pour into hers. Somehow she had managed to suppress her need thereafter, letting our desperation for one another take over her mind and body entirely. Hours later, after we had the will to resurface from the spiral we had surrendered ourselves to, we knew it was something we desperately needed to discuss with Carlisle.
Bella began stirring, breaking me from my memory of that night. As my human girl so loved to put it, we had been getting cockblocked quite regularly over the last few weeks. It was truly no one's fault. I had changed so drastically in a brief amount of time, my family was nothing short of ecstatic that I had found my place in our world. No longer was I the self-deprecating shut-in that rarely said more than one sentence a week to my family - they all wanted to know me, as a man and as a vampire. The people who I had lived day in and day out with didn't really have that option up until this point. I very much wanted to clue them in, because now that I had Bella in my life, I finally realized the blessings I'd had the entire time leading up to my purpose, my light…
I had been waiting so incredibly long to become the person she made me be.
So with our family's excitement over my participation in our close-knit group, mixed in with the joy they found in Bella's companionship, it was difficult to find a moment where we could be alone. Bella and I had no hesitations when it came to making love whenever we desired. She was very rarely embarrassed, and I had been subjected to my obnoxious siblings' carnal sounds for decades. But as much as we let ourselves go, there were times when we just wanted it to belong to us. It wasn't as if our family was sitting around and listening in for fun, but considering how filthy our mouths could get, it was only natural for them to take notice.
We had quickly delved into a relationship so intense it was difficult to comprehend…time spent alone together was imperative, and we simply weren't getting enough of it.
With our family's joy also came their protection. Because of Bella's unorthodox evolution into vampirism, Carlisle felt like it was just too dangerous for them to venture off at such a pivotal time in her journey. As our frustration grew, however, Carlisle was internally conceding that leaving Bella and I alone would be highly beneficial to everyone.
Just don't bite her when I'm not nearby, Edward. His silent and playful chastising had made me smile wider than I was used to and I'd merely ducked my head, nodding in acquiescence.
"What are you thinking about over there, vamp boy?"
And suddenly everything was just fucking perfect again.
I was hovering above her in a flash, my dick hard from reliving the night my human girl was crazed with the taste of her own blood. I wanted her so badly I was shaking, and my control was getting more difficult to sustain with every moment spent with my love.
I felt a warm tingling sensation in my chest as Bella stretched her arms while laying beneath me, smiling so brightly that I couldn't help but smile in return. She bit her lip and lifted her hips, coming into contact with my straining cock. "Good morning to me," she whispered sinfully.
"It's about to get better," I growled, grabbing her by the ass and flipping us over until she was on top of me.
She squealed as her hands came down with a slap against my chest. My girl was horny and in love with me simultaneously, every second of the day. I just couldn't get enough of the feelings she elicited inside me.
I bunched her underwear in my fists on both sides of her hips, growling as she reached behind her to stroke my cock through my boxer-briefs. "Why are you doing this, baby, you know you have to hunt with them this morning. You've ditched them the last five times."
"The last four times…and why would I need to hunt when I can have my fill of you?" I slid my hand up over her breast above her tank top until two of my fingers were massaging her bite mark.
Her eyes rolled back and her nostrils flared at the mention of tasting her blood. She hadn't had as strong of a reaction to it since the night I unintentionally fed her more than she was accustomed to, but now the anticipation nearly destroyed her when it was time to break through her skin. "Jesus, Edward, I want you to fuck me in so many different ways, I don't even know where to start."
I sat up until she was straddling me and we were face to face. I felt my expression shifting from loving mate to depraved vampire. The night before I had made love to her so slowly, telling her how much I loved her and connecting with her on a level that validated my purpose on this Earth. But this morning I needed to own. I needed to hear her scream my name and beg and cry until she was damn near seizuring beneath me.
I licked her bottom lip and pressed my palms against the mattress, lifting my ass up off the bed and grinding my cock firmly into her fabric-covered pussy. My movements made it so all of her weight rested on my dick; she felt hot and soft and perfect pressed so firmly against me. Bella whimpered as she ripped her tank top over her head and prepared to be taken hard and fast by her vampire, just as she fucking liked it.
"My vampire," she whispered with a smirk, burying her fingers in my hair and lifting up on her knees so I could get rid of the last barrier standing between us.
"Edwaaaard…"
Goddamn Motherfucker.
Bella groaned, pressing her forehead firmly against mine as we heard Emmett call up to me from the bottom of the stairs. "I told you," she whimpered in aggravation. "For being such a bad-ass vampire, your listening skills are pretty much equivalent to the typical human male."
I smacked her ass, my eyes involuntarily closing at the sound it made and the way her creamy skin shifted beneath my force. Fuck, it was just so hard not getting wrapped up in her.
"We've given you enough free passes, brother. I'd say we've been more than generous. Cover up, B. I'm coming in whether you're decent or not, and you know that's the truth." Emmett began running up the stairs, sounding like he had ten elephants trailing behind him. Bella haphazardly threw her tank top back on, and I just barely had us tucked beneath the blankets before the door flew open.
"Damn, vamp boy, you were going to do that to me and you didn't even have the door locked?" Bella's voice rose an octave higher as she slapped my chest, making me smile ridiculously.
"I forgot."
"Bullshit, vampires don't forget," Emmett pointed out, tapping the side of his head. "The faster we leave, the sooner you two can finish getting all freaky-deaky. Jasper's outside waiting impatiently."
"Is he still pouting like a five-year-old?" I questioned with a smirk.
We heard Alice reply with a distant "yes," causing us to chuckle.
It was all in good fun, but I knew Jasper's bitterness toward Bella's newfound development had her feeling a bit guilty. I kissed her temple and held her tightly. "He's not really mad, beloved. He just doesn't like not having the upper hand."
She kissed my shoulder and rested her chin against it without saying a word.
One week ago, Alice and Jasper's gifts had very abruptly stopped working on Bella. It made Alice nervous and Jasper aggravated, since he was in the middle of attempting to mess with her when we discovered her immunity to their talents. I was beyond excited to know what this meant for Bella once she was changed…I'd been certain since day one that whatever her talent was, it would be extraordinary.
At first Jasper's irritability was comical to all of us, but I could tell it was starting to upset Bella. Luckily for me, I had a morning-long hunting excursion where I could discuss the matter with Jasper as much as I'd like.
I sure as hell didn't want to leave Bella, though.
She kissed my shoulder once more and wrapped an arm around my waist. Her playful demeanor had disappeared shortly after Emmett had entered our room, and it had me concerned. "I'll be down in a minute," I murmured to Emmett.
"Dude, if you even think about starting that shit up again-"
"Emmett," I interrupted him, shooting him a furtive glance. "Give me five minutes."
He winked at Bella before walking out of the room with his hands on the back of his head, relocating to the kitchen to violate Rosalie as she began making breakfast for Bella.
I was shocked that such an act was taking place, but every part of me was soon focused on Bella and her sudden quietness. I shifted until I was lying on my side facing her, reaching out to wrap my fingers around the curve of her hip as I searched her eyes. "What is it, baby?" I whispered.
She gave me a half-hearted shrug, losing herself in the redness of my eyes like she so often did. "It's stupid."
I tipped her chin with my finger. "Isabella, don't you dare…"
She dragged her fingernails across my chest lazily as she organized her thoughts. "I just…feel disconnected from you. I know that since we've come here we've spent more time together than ever before but…in Forks, it was always about us and what we were and how we were going to get to this point. I'm so happy being here with you and our family, but…we need time when it's just us, too. I wouldn't trade being with the family for the world, but I miss our intimacy, I miss the privacy we used to find because we had to. That probably doesn't even make sense…"
I pulled her against my chest, kissing her hair as my arms wrapped around her waist. "I know exactly what you mean, Bella. When I return from hunting, we can figure out a solution to this. I don't think there's any harm in getting away for awhile, someplace where we can be completely alone. We'll discuss it with Carlisle."
"Well I don't want to be a big baby about it…"
I rolled my eyes. "You aren't being a baby when I need it just as badly. Besides, you won't let me do the really dirty things to you when the family is in listening distance."
She laughed lightly and wrapped her arms around my back. "I know…I need you to do very dirty things to me, baby," she whined quietly.
I kissed her forehead and squeezed her ass, pushing against her with my hips. "I can stay…"
"Mmmm, you can't stay, vamp boy. Get your hungry vampire on and then come back to me. Carlisle wants to go all mad-scientist on me anyway." Bella crawled on top of me and tangled her tongue with mine, the hot wetness of her mouth making me lose control all over again. "Go, I love you," she whispered.
I gathered her hair in my hands and tossed it behind her shoulder, sucking the skin where I typically drank from her into my mouth. "I love you, Bella," I murmured sincerely against her soft flesh, placing gentle kisses there as I crushed her to me once more. "I wish you knew how much."
She pulled back and smiled, cupping my face in her palms. "I do, Edward. Go, before I chase Emmett away with a match so I can keep you longer."
"You can keep me forever," I murmured deeply, letting our noses brush delicately together before I kissed her once more. "And ever, and ever…"
"Please go, it's starting to hurt, baby…"
I sighed despondently, kissing her softly before dressing in a flash and disappearing from our room as quickly as I could. With every step I took away from my Bella, my chest twisted even further in discomfort - I knew she was experiencing the exact same sensation. Even now, with nothing standing in our way, the complexities of our unyielding bond were still a mystery to me.
A mystery I would have an eternity to discover.
-x-x-
***BPOV***
My arms stretched languidly over my head as I yawned, kicking my feet toward the corners of the bed and stretching my legs as well. I could still smell my vamp boy on the sheets, the pillow, my clothes, my skin…I missed him already, but honestly I had no reason to bitch about a single thing. My emotions had been all over the place lately, with leaving my father behind and dealing with the changes my body was going through. Because damn, there were changes.
Every day I felt closer to Edward, but in the same token, I missed him ridiculously. I wanted it to be about us again, and even though everyone was paranoid about leaving us alone, it was something we desperately needed. With a sigh, I breathed through the pain in my chest that Edward's absence caused me, and then I smiled…just like I did every morning I awoke, every night I fell asleep, and all the fuck-awesome space in between.
It had been nearly a month since we had relocated to the snowy seclusion that the cabin in Wyoming offered us. And calling it a cabin was a fucking joke because oh my God, it was gorgeous. Hardwood everything, rustic yet modern, bedrooms the size of Charlie's house, and equipped with everything you'd ever need to hide away from the rest of the world.
My favorite feature was the hot tub. It was surreal to feel Edward as warm as me, but I was thankful that I could still feel the hardness of his skin. I wanted to enjoy the way he felt against me before I changed and we were the same. Don't get me wrong, I'd been nothing short of a petulant toddler when it came to being impatient. But I typically kept that shit to myself because I knew Edward's venom would take effect at the most perfect moment. Not to mention I didn't want to discourage him just because I was being a whine-ass.
Even though I was essentially still human, there weren't capable enough words in the dictionary to explain the transformation I'd already undergone in these weeks I had spent tucked away with my family.
First it was the blood thing…that happened about a week or so after we first arrived. I'd always enjoyed tasting my blood on Edward's tongue, more for the eroticism of the act than anything. It never tasted bad to me, but I wasn't about to run down to Starbucks and order a Grande Type-O Frappacino. Well, that all changed drastically on a typical Saturday evening. Edward and I were going at it - naturally. When he slid his teeth out of my body and connected with my mouth, something snapped inside me. This time, when that first taste of warmth and copper touched my taste buds, absolutely everything began to spiral into a haze of intense need.
I wasn't ready to kill for it or anything, but I wanted it bad enough to grip onto the sides of Edward's head and lap at his mouth like a starving fucking kitten on crack. It was good. Like, chocolate and whipped cream and strawberries kind of good. We were so far lost in our passion, but luckily he talked some sense into me, giving me one more mouth-watering taste before cutting me off. The next day we were seated in Carlisle's study, watching his golden eyes sparkle with wonderment and a deep fascination of what the fuck I was becoming.
I suggested that perhaps I should try munching on some deer blood like the rest of them, but Edward and Carlisle quickly shot that down. Something about it being unsafe for me to digest animal blood in my delicate human form; but honestly, just how delicate could I be at this point?
In the end, they laid down the cockblock on my hunting career until I was all sparkly and hard. I wasn't too distraught about it; I still got to sneak a taste off of Edward's tongue daily, and that was enough for me.
The next oddity occurred about a week ago, and even though I was perplexed as to what the hell was going on inside my body, it was kind of amusing to see my siblings so frustrated and pissy about it.
If Jasper wasn't trying to fuck with my emotions like the douche-nozzle he was, it might not have been discovered so soon. Now that we were mostly sheltered from danger, Alice rarely got all up in my business. But Jasper just had to attempt to make me angry for the sake of his own amusement. Later on he claimed that he had wanted to see if he could get me to bitch-slap Edward. Apparently it would have been some sort of grand feat to get me to smack up the vampire I was head over heels in love with. So when he sent me his rage-vibes and I continued to hug up on my vamp boy while I ate my Lucky Charms, he knew something was up.
But Jasper never took rejection easily, so he'd spent another ten minutes throwing everything he had my way.
"Jasper, what the hell are you doing?" Edward finally questioned him, clearly amused at whatever had been going through his brother's head.
Jasper's nostrils flared as he glared at him. "At what point in time did she learn how to block me out?"
Suddenly Alice was there, as if she had materialized out of thin air. "Jazz," she spoke quietly, walking toward me and running her fingers through my hair. "She's not blocking you, she just can't feel what you're doing to her."
I looked up at my sister and best friend with wide eyes. "What?"
"Bella, let's go talk to Carlisle; I can't see you anymore. And Jasper can't sway your emotions so…" she drifted off, a smile playing on her lips before she met my stare. "You're going to be so amazing, even though this will most certainly drive me insane."
I'd squeezed her hand and turned to meet Edward's eyes; what I saw had taken my breath away. I had never seen them more alight. Pride, adoration, excitement, love…he was finally realizing that his venom and my determination would be the final factors in my transformation. Everything was exhilarating and brand new and kind of scary, but one thing was for certain, I was ready for more. Every morning I wanted to wake up and be one step closer to being his vampire. I wasn't entirely convinced that I'd have a special power like some of the members of my family did, but they had never been more sure of anything in their very long existences. And that made me so incredibly happy.
Carlisle had no medical explanation for my sudden ability to block out their vampiric gifts. All he could chalk it up to was that I was undoubtedly getting closer to my change, and that this new development could very well have something to do with what my future gift might be. I let him do "experiments" on me weekly, but he knew I hated feeling like a lab rat so he never pushed for more, as much as I knew he wanted to. For hours I would rest my head against Edward's chest as he and Carlisle spoke for eons about prokaryotic cells and eukaryote cells and the nuclear material of them and…yeah, eventually I asked them to dumb it down for me. Apparently the cells in my body were morphing, but Carlisle wasn't sure what that meant for me just yet.
I didn't really care, I just wanted to be Edward's vampire.
Nevertheless, I was an anomaly, and as much as I was Carlisle's daughter first and foremost, he couldn't help but view me as a fascinating case-subject as well. I didn't hold it against him, but I wasn't going to let him turn me into some sort of Franken-bitch either. He tried to apologize excessively for his obtrusive interest in my unconventional change, and I did everything in my power to convince him that he had nothing to be sorry for.
Having Carlisle as such an amazing father figure made me miss Charlie very much, and I tried not to think about his life now that he was a grieving parent. Guilt weighed me down constantly, considering I was happier than I had ever been and his world was no doubt falling apart around him. I wanted to be miserable because of what I had done to him, and a significant part of me was. But living with Edward and learning his family and existing in a world I felt so natural in…I couldn't allow myself to feel obligated into depression. So maybe I was a selfish brat for embracing my joy, but I reasoned with myself that Charlie would have wanted nothing less for me.
There wasn't a day that went by where I didn't think about him, or Jacob, or my boys. I expected it to hurt a lot more than it did, but once I absorbed myself in the new life the Cullens and I had created, it was difficult to remember a time before this.
So I laughed with my siblings, loved my adoptive parents, and lived for my mate - all while waiting for my day to come.
I swear to God, I could almost taste it on the tip of my tongue.
"Get out of bed, Bella, I'm slaving over a hot stove for your spoiled ass," Rosalie murmured from the kitchen below me. Oh yeah, apparently my family suspected that my hearing was heightened as well but honestly, I was pretty fucking positive I'd always had stellar hearing. But if they wanted to chalk it up to Bella becoming a vamp, I'd sure as hell take it.
I kicked the covers off my legs and groaned, suddenly popping up from the mattress. "Rose, why the hell are you cooking for me?"
"Don't say thank you or anything, Jesus," she grumbled.
I stumbled over to our closet and threw on some clothes, smirking as I slammed the door shut. "Whatever, Rose. I'm not entirely sure that rat poison would kill me. Aw shit, Carlisle's gonna have to run more tests."
I heard Carlisle chuckle from his study as I bounded down the stairs.
"They're spiked with Pine-Sol, bitch," she smirked, setting my plate of deliciousness on the table as I took a seat. "Now eat before they get cold."
"You'd have to dose me over time in order for that to work, genius," I mumbled through a mouthful of pancakes, suddenly realizing just how famished I was.
Before Rosalie could sneak in another offensive comment, Esme and Carlisle entered the room. "Hey guys, want some pancakes?" I extended my fork to them and they crinkled their noses, shaking their heads. "I don't get how anyone couldn't like pancakes."
Carlisle sat down at the table, pulling Esme into his lap. "I have eaten them in the past actually, although that was long ago. To us, Bella, I would liken them to what pure flour would taste like to you. Not incredibly enjoyable."
"That's tragic," I shook my head, watching the syrup fall from my fork before shoveling it into my mouth. "Although, I would think the worst part would be hacking it back up."
"I don't understand why you're complaining about the food thing. You're the one who wants to become a slaughtering monster, you should probably just get over it."
Oh Rosalie, what a delicate flower she was.
"Pshh, why do you think I'm mowing down on these pancakes? I'm going to enjoy delicious food while I can," I smiled.
"Or you'll just make yourself fat."
I shrugged my shoulders. "More cushion for the pushin', sis. That's what the kids are saying these days, anyway."
Carlisle and Esme laughed, shaking their heads and exchanging an amused look as Rosalie walked out of the room with an eye roll.
"What?" I asked through a mouthful of pancakes.
Carlisle smiled warmly, running a hand across the top of my head. "Nothing at all, sweetheart. Will you be ready to attempt our next so-called experiment after breakfast?"
I groaned, shooting him an exasperated look that caused him to chuckle once more. "I want to test your speed, Bella. That's not so bad, is it?"
I sighed in relief, shaking my head. "No, that's doable. What did you have in mind?"
"Well, basically I'll have you run as quickly as you can and compare it to that of a typical human woman your age."
I stood and took my plate to the sink, rinsing it before placing it in the dishwasher. "I can handle that for sure. Hey, have you guys seen Alice?"
"She went with the boys, sweetheart. Apparently she needed some male-bonding time," Esme smiled wryly. "It's rather mind-boggling that someone so wrapped up in fashion and beauty could be such a tom-boy."
"Alice is one of a kind, there's no denying that," I chuckled. "So what's up Esme, you want a piece of this? Let's race. Winner gets to eat the rest of the pancakes, yeah?" I lifted my hand for a high five but she left me hanging with a disgusted look.
She rose from Carlisle's lap and squeezed my shoulders, kissing the top of my head. "I'll race you, but if pancakes are my prize, I'll most certainly be letting you win. Or I'll just make Carlisle eat them. Come on, darling."
And that was why I loved Carlisle and Esme Cullen.
-x-x-
***EPOV***
I was exercising great strength as my siblings and I walked at a leisurely pace toward home. If I listened closely enough, I could just make out Bella's laughter and the soft thumping against concrete as she and someone else ran along it. I was so anxious to know whether or not Bella's speed had been advanced as well, but I also knew this stroll I was taking with the others was rather important. They needed to feel connected with me individually, not just Bella and I as a couple.
We walked along silently for a moment, Alice on Jasper's back as we traipsed through the snow-covered hills. I began to open my mouth to speak, but Alice, as always, was two steps ahead of me.
"Believe me, Edward, I've tried. I can't see her at all. And this time it's not black clouds covering my visions like it was with the wolves, it's like they're just gone. A white, empty space of nothing. I can't stand not being able to see what's coming for her." Alice sighed before continuing. "But to answer your question, I have no idea what speed she is reaching at this point."
"Do you think she'll be a shield?" Jasper questioned, jumping up onto a tree branch and skipping from tree to tree rather than walking on the ground below.
I shrugged my shoulders. "It's hard to say, Jazz." I hoped for her sake that whatever gift she attained once she was a vampire would be easily manageable. I could remember the first time I'd discovered my talent upon waking up as an entirely different being. It was quite a daunting feeling to not only be bum-rushed with all these new thoughts in your own mind, let alone processing those of others as well. It took me years to properly compartmentalize the thoughts I'd heard around me, and even still, as useful a tool as it sometimes was, it was a burden to constantly have a cacophony of ideas in your head that didn't belong to you.
"It's crazy how she keeps changing little by little, as if she's building up to her transformation. I wonder if it will be the typical three-day pain-fest, or if she'll just wake up one morning and be one of us," Emmett added.
"There's just no way of knowing, especially now, when that infuriating girl has blinded me," Alice grumbled.
Emmett and Jasper chuckled while I smiled softly, looking up to find Alice amongst the trees. "It's not her fault, you know."
"I know," Alice sighed. "Honestly Edward, couldn't you have chosen a more typical human to fall in love with? Instead you pick one who's best friends with shape-shifters, and beholds all these vampire attributes while she's still very much a human girl."
I shook my head and smiled, feeling my legs shaking in the need to run to my not-so-human girl. All this talk of her was making it more unbearable by the minute. "You don't fool me for a second, Alice. You wouldn't trade Bella for the world."
"That's true, but I still wish I could see her," she murmured despondently.
Jasper landed next to me gracefully, twisting his neck until his lips met Alice's. "I think Bella has made it clear that she's more than capable of taking care of herself. I have no doubt it will transfer into her vampirism right along with her."
Emmett wrapped his arms around us and sighed. "Well this has been an enlightening chat, but I'm gonna go race a vampire-human-hybrid-girl. Catch ya later!" He took off through the trees, taking out a few that stood in his way for the fun of it.
I took that as my cue to hurry to Bella's side, but hesitated briefly, meeting Jasper's eyes. "You'll lay off of her about being able to block you out, right?"
He nodded solemnly, golden eyes against bright crimson. "I've only noticed her guilt-ridden emotions the past few times I've made mention of it, and I honestly never meant to make her feel badly about blocking me. At first it made me feel, I don't know, like less of a vampire? But once I realized it was just another step toward what she'll become, I gave her grief about it for pure sport. I realize I've taken it too far, Edward, and I'll definitely apologize to Bella. I never meant any harm."
I clapped his back and started walking backwards ahead of him, smiling crookedly. "I know you didn't, Jasper. I'm going to collect my - what did Emmett call her? Vampire-human-hybrid-girl? Either way, I can't stay away from her anymore…and you two are finally getting your wish, an enormous forest entirely to yourselves."
I turned and began running at full speed, already hearing a large branch crack from something I fought desperately not to envision in my mind. It amazed me how conversations with my family almost always came back to Bella. For the entirety of our hunting trip this morning, we had been discussing things from the past, moments I'd missed out on and all the things we had to look forward to now that I had, in a sense, been given a second chance at immortality. But our discussion ultimately segued to Bella and the mystery of what she was becoming.
Everyone was just so excited about the unknown factors of her new developments. In a never-ending life that tended to get monotonous, someone as refreshing as Bella was a godsend to us. It wasn't just the way in which she was joining our family, it was the dynamic she brought to our group as a whole. Carlisle had never been more right when he said that Bella was our missing piece. It felt so fucking incredible to actually feel like a part of something now; I had battled my own demons for so long to distance myself from them, and only when Bella entered my world did I realize just how preposterous of a notion that was.
With every step I took, Bella's delicious scent became more heavy on my tongue, driving me insane with the need to have her wrapped in my arms. I knew our bond would only strengthen once she was one of us, and while it was slightly unnerving to think of how we could be even more intense than we already were, I was quite anxious to experience it.
When I crested over the top of the hill, I immediately searched the yard for Bella, my eyes finally landing on her sprawled out across the front porch of the ranch. I then pillaged Carlisle's mind for a glimpse of my girl running, to which he readily complied. He showed me a vision of Bella starting at one end of the paved driveway and racing down it until she reached the garage. It was difficult for me to judge her speed from a memory, so as I took a seat next to Bella and pulled her into my lap, I immediately asked her how it went. Her heart was racing frantically as she rested her cheek against my collarbone, panting to catch her breath. "I think I should try out for the Olympics." She looked up at me a long moment, her smile becoming shy as she tightened my shirt in her fist. "Hi," she murmured gently.
I sighed unevenly and pulled her body entirely against mine, placing slow kisses against her neck before finally resting my lips against her ear. "I missed you. Even in that incredibly flimsy amount of time…I could barely stand it."
"Mmmm, me either, vamp boy. Come here, tighter." I wrapped her up and put more force in my embrace than I typically would, letting us surrender to a reunion that was well over due, regardless of the time we spent apart.
I ran my hand from the curve of her hip down the length of her leg as we kissed ardently, breaking apart with a heavy sigh. "I am ridiculously in love with you, Isabella Swan."
"Hmm, you're going to love me even more when I'm running circles around you." She beamed up at me, pressing her lips delicately to mine as her eyes shined in excitement.
I chuckled, adjusting her position in my lap so I could see her properly, and asking for more details.
"I just raced up and down that insanely long driveway and passed out on the steps about five seconds before you got here. Emmett lapped me a few times because he thinks he's cool, but then he took off with Rosalie. I felt like I was flying, though! What's the verdict, Carlisle?"
He came to stand in front of us, his smile wry as he consulted his stopwatch before slipping it in his pocket. "Bella, you have an average speed of 32 miles-per-hour."
She raised her eyebrows in surprise. "How fast can you guys run?"
Carlisle shrugged. "It varies. Edward is the fastest…we've clocked him at just over 100 miles-per-hour. But essentially, the rest of us can run anywhere from 50 to 90 miles-per-hour."
Bella's lips twisted in frustration, but I had no idea why. "Bella, you're running over twice as fast as the average female human, that's certainly an advancement."
"Yeah, but it's nowhere near as fast as you guys," she frowned.
Carlisle crouched in front of us, tucking a strand of hair behind Bella's ear. "You have no reason to feel discouraged, sweetheart. I'm absolutely shocked that you've reached the speeds you did. I'm sure if we give it a try in a couple days, you'll be even faster than before. You're remarkable, Bella, you both are. What you and Edward are giving each other, it's as fascinating as it is beautiful."
Something in Carlisle's quiet words of approval affected me deeply, and when Bella's eyes met mine, I had to choke back the emotion that was building in my chest. She sensed it immediately, sliding her small hand beneath my shirt and rubbing the skin above my still heart soothingly. I sighed and rested my forehead against her temple, closing my eyes and breathing deeply in and out.
I heard Esme come to stand beside Carlisle before he unnecessarily cleared his throat. "Later this evening, we'll be dispersing for a night or two. I think we could all use some time alone with our mates. Do either one of you have any concerns about that?" he asked us.
Bella looked up and shook her head vigorously. "We'll be fine, there's nothing to worry about."
Carlisle smiled at Bella before turning, mentally addressing me. "We won't be incredibly far, son. If anything were to happen, we could be back within the hour. We haven't been intentionally hovering over the two of you, but with the uncertainty of how exactly Bella will transform into one of us, it's been important that we remain nearby."
I nodded, and Bella groaned in frustration. "You're doing it again!" she accused.
Carlisle apologized and reiterated everything he had said to me out loud, grinning sheepishly.
"That wasn't so hard, now was it?" Bella smirked, obviously teasing him.
Carlisle shook his head, pulling Esme closer to his side. "Old habits die hard, sweetheart. I don't intentionally strive to keep you out of the loop, please forgive me."
"It's okay, I'm just nosy," she admitted, kissing me on the lips before standing and taking Esme's hand. "All this running has me famished, should we make some human food and watch a rom-com before we all go into hiding for the weekend?"
Esme nodded, kissing Bella on the cheek before they walked up the front steps of the porch. Bella leaned down and ruffled my hair before kissing it. "Come with us," she whispered softly.
I took her hand, kissing each knuckle before meeting her dark eyes. "I'll be right there, beloved."
She sighed and swept her fingers through my hair once more, turning to look at Carlisle. "32 miles-per-hour, huh?" When he nodded, she continued. "I guess that is kind of fast, I could pretty much outrun my old truck any day of the week."
"It's fast, Bella," I agreed.
As I watched the women walk into the house, talking animatedly to one another, I had never felt so much pride. My Bella was yet again surpassing the capabilities of a typical human, and I just knew that we were getting so close to the moment I had been waiting for since the first day I'd met her.
-x-x-
The sun had just begun to set as the family prepared to leave Bella and I alone for the next two days.
I could focus on nothing but her.
Ever since Carlisle informed us that they would be leaving, Bella played her sexy, coy little game that she continually loved to torture me with. She wouldn't touch me unless it was an innocent and altogether on purpose brush against my body. She fucked me with her eyes from across the table, she'd whisper something delectable and promising in my ear as she walked past me, and she always thought she had the upper hand.
But not this time.
In the background, Emmett was rambling on about the house rules while "Mommy and Daddy" were gone. Alice was practically dragging Jasper out the front door, and everyone else was close behind them. It suddenly occurred to me that maybe Bella and I weren't the only ones desperate for some time alone.
It was amazing how she gazed so deeply into my eyes, making promises with nothing other than the sinister gleam amongst darkened brown. Everything faded away but Bella, her back leaning against the opposite wall and her body shaking for me alone. I knew she was keeping her distance on purpose, tempting me with everything I couldn't yet have while our family remained standing around us.
I hazily heard Carlisle telling us to enjoy our weekend, and I stood from my resting place against the back of the couch, taking one step closer toward Bella. I barely tilted my head, forcing a smile and wishing him the same. I looked at Bella once more, my nostrils flaring as she shifted her position and assaulted me with the agonizingly sweet scent of her arousal. They needed to leave before they got a very real, very detailed show of just how badly I needed to fuck my mate.
I took another step forward and Bella mumbled her goodbyes, her fingernails pushing into the drywall behind her as she took in my heated gaze. The second I heard the front door shut behind my family, I was pouncing, the wall indented with my hand prints as they landed loudly on either side of her head.
"Do you have any idea what I'm going to do to you?" I murmured, watching her pale skin turn a delicate pink as she licked her lips. I pushed my forehead against the wall next to where her head was resting, breathing heavily as I shifted my hips and let her feel just how hard she made me. It was the only part of my body that was touching hers, and I could feel her squirming against the wall in her need for more. "You teased me all day, Bella."
She whimpered deep in her throat, her hands trembling to reach out and touch me before she thought otherwise. "I'm not sorry," she whispered breathlessly. "I wanted my vampire, and I knew exactly what I needed to do to get him."
I snarled beneath my breath, resisting the urge to cover her body with mine. "Oh you've got him, Isabella…you've got him. Down, now. Make it up to me with that little mouth of yours."
She dropped to her knees instantly, meeting my eyes from beneath her lashes as she bit down as hard as she could on my groin, causing me to involuntarily thrust against her mouth. She could be as rough as she wanted to be with my cock thanks to my infallibility, and her increased force only gave me that much more pleasure.
When she released me from the hold she had on me with her teeth, she licked my length through the fabric of my jeans. I moaned loudly and she replaced her lips with her hand, squeezing me viciously in her grip as she knelt up to release the button of my pants with her teeth.
"Fuck…" I cursed as she kneaded me firmly in her grasp, releasing me with one tight squeeze as she dragged my zipper down with her teeth. She pulled at my jeans until they were halfway down my thighs, stopping to stare at the cock that only ever belonged to her. She ran her fingertip across the wetness that had formed against my boxer-briefs before leaning forward to suck it into her mouth. We moaned simultaneously as my fingers dug further into the wall, not giving a shit about the damage I was inflicting.
Once she was done sucking me through my underwear, she pulled them down until they joined my jeans. She began stroking my cock languidly in her fist as she gazed at me as if she were mesmerized. "Shirt off," she whispered, leaning forward and lifting me until her tongue was dragging hotly down the underside of my shaft and across my balls.
I ripped my shirt over my head before reaching down, cupping Bella's jaw in my hand while pushing the hair from her eyes with the other. "Open," I quietly demanded.
I slowly slid my dick into her mouth, carefully letting her adjust to my firmness. I always had to remain in control when she sucked me, conscious of every thrust and movement on my part. I wasn't going to hurt my love, but I needed to feel every inch of me buried inside her soft, wet throat. My fingers drifted up to stroke her cheek, to trace her closed eyelids and then sweep across her bottom lip. She opened wider, her fingers gripping my ass firmly and attempting to push me farther into her mouth. "No, I need it slow, baby. You don't know how far you're going to be taking this cock…we need to take it slow."
She moaned around the head of my cock, releasing my ass with one hand to pull desperately on her nipple that was protruding against her shirt. I lifted her hand and pressed it against my abdomen, my words strained as I pushed a bit farther inside her. "Concentrate, Bella. You worked so diligently on getting me this hard, now it's time for you to fucking do something about it."
She tilted her head back and elongated her throat, making it easier for me to slide down it. I grabbed the base of my erection and squeezed, guiding myself into her mouth until she had nearly all of me inside. I ran my fingers along the back of her throat as she struggled to sustain me, pushing farther and not stopping until every inch of me was deep inside of her.
"Oh fuck, Jesus Christ, Bella…" I groaned breathlessly, slamming my fist into the wall and biting down on my lip as she slowly began bobbing up and down on my cock. I rested my forehead against the arm I had leaning against the wall, staring down at the glorious sight of my girl taking so much of me into her throat. I reached down with my other hand and clumsily tore her shirt from her body, scrap by scrap.
She finally came up for air, taking a few deep breaths before tightening her lips around the head of my cock like a suction and running her tongue forcefully along the bottom ridge. I was going to cum soon, and then I was going to take her to our bedroom and fuck her until she lost her fucking mind.
I ripped her bra off of her body and forcefully palmed one of her breasts, pushing her head back down on my dick with my other hand and setting her pace. I laced my fingers through her hair and held her head against the wall, thrusting inside her mouth frantically as the pressure began building inside my body. I felt her cheeks hollowing around my cock as she sucked me, using her teeth as much as she could to intensify the sensations of pleasure spider-webbing throughout every inch of me. My cock jerked violently and it caused me to thrust hard, too hard, into her throat. She cried out softly around me and I pulled back, looking down to frantically meet her eyes.
"I'm fine, keep going. Please keep going," she whimpered.
I dove right back in, tightening my fingers in her hair as I pulled her mouth up and down my rock hard shaft. I was going to come so fucking hard, every inch of me tensing so rigidly that I was shaking violently. "Drink every drop, beloved, I want to feel you swallow every drop of my cum."
She moaned and pulled me closer, sucking me furiously as I began thrusting unevenly into her mouth. I cried out loudly and stilled as I found my release, my girl swallowing urgently around my cock to take everything I gave her, just like I had demanded. My climax lasted so incredibly long, the jerking pleasure making me spasm repeatedly as I continued to push slowly in and out of her.
I felt the strong urge to collapse, my legs feeling somewhat unstable as I fought to recover from a very intense, all-consuming orgasm. Before I could even contemplate it, however, Bella had jumped into my arms and wrapped her legs around my waist, grabbing my hand and shoving it down her pants.
"Holy fuck," I panted as I came into contact with her hot, completely saturated skin. My girl was gushing for me, and I wasted no time thrusting two fingers inside her pussy and curling them tightly. She pushed against my hand as I carried her up the stairs, my fingers working her so frantically that our combined sounds rang out loudly between us.
Bella grabbed two fistfuls of my hair and pulled violently as she plunged her tongue into my mouth, moaning wildly as I brought her closer to climax with every twist of my fingers. I abruptly tossed her on our bed, grabbing my now hard cock with my fist and stroking myself firmly as I watched her bounce against the mattress. My pants still hung off my hips as I watched her climb backwards on the bed until she was leaning against the headboard and her legs were spread wide.
My mouth instantly filled with venom as she wiggled her perfect ass until her pants came sliding down her legs, along with her lacy panties. Just like that, she was completely naked and dragging her middle finger up and down her gloriously pink pussy. I clenched my fists at my side and closed my eyes, ceasing to breathe as I fought for control. "I'm going to hurt you, Bella. If I get on that bed with you, I'm going to fuck you harder than you can take."
"Edward, take your pants off."
I groaned and pushed a hand through my hair, frustrated at the roadblock that was constantly put between us. Sometimes I felt so out of control that there was no way I could trust myself, or her when she continually egged me on. "Do you think I'm fucking kidding right now?" I growled, shoving the remainder of my clothing off and taking a step closer to the bed. "Do you know how fucking painful it is to need you so fucking badly and yet I constantly have to worry about ending your life? Bella…I have to touch you, but I'll break your fucking bones if I do."
She knelt on the bed and crawled toward me, tentatively reaching her hand out to wrap around my hip and bring me closer. I didn't resist, walking forward until we were chest to chest. Without a word she wrapped her arms around my waist, laying her ear over my heart. "I still feel it beating, you know. Especially at times like this, when you're so far gone that you don't know what to do with yourself. I hate seeing you so upset, but I love seeing you so alive, baby."
I clenched my fists against her back and rested my chin on the top of her head, flexing my jaw and trying like hell not to harm her. "I love you too much," I whispered shakily.
Bella kissed my chest and smiled against my skin. "You're stealing my words now. Come on, Edward. Lay with me, I need to feel you. I need you to love me and ravish me at the same time; I know you can do it. Trust yourself like I trust you."
Maybe it was the fact that we were entirely alone, but I didn't trust myself in that moment. She needed me to love her though, and that was something I would never ever deny her.
I knelt onto the bed and crawled over her until her back was flat against the mattress. I remained there, just hovering above her, staring down and attempting to figure out how anyone as magnificent as her could love someone like me. I studied every inch of her…the curve of her hips, her pink nipples, her plump bottom lip, the sparkling eyes that told me she loved me every second they met mine…I felt so fucking much for this girl that it overtook me completely.
Suddenly I wasn't worried about hurting her any longer - I was worried that I was incapable of showing her just how much I loved her.
I rested my forearms on either side of her head, aligning the rest of my body with hers until we were skin to skin, chest to chest. She kissed me chastely, taking my bottom lip between hers and sucking it slowly, sweetly, sensually. I could taste myself on her and it made me throb in achingly perfect pleasure. Once again we had gone from urgent and rough to slow and loving, in that amazing way we had of combining the two. We always knew exactly what the other needed, and this time was no different.
The room was completely dark apart from the large, bright moon that shined in through the window, casting her creamy skin in the most breathtaking light. "Bella, I don't know…I just don't know how…"
She silenced me with her lips, kissing me deeply before wrapping her arms around my neck and bringing my face to her shoulder. "I feel it too, baby," she whispered, dragging her nails soothingly along my scalp. "My heart feels like it's going to break, it can't hold all of you inside it."
I slid my arm beneath her body and pulled her against me, holding her too tightly, too fucking tightly and yet I couldn't stop. Her breath caught as I crushed her to me but she didn't protest, pulling me against her and hugging me in just the same way. "Sorry it didn't stay dirty," I chuckled hoarsely, releasing her just enough to move up her body and realign us. My eyes fluttered closed as the head of my cock slid against her opening, coating me with her juices and confirming just how ready for me she was.
She laughed softly and rolled her eyes, kissing my lips. "Are you kidding me, vamp boy? I love our intensity…it doesn't matter how we show it, as long as we do. I told you I was feeling disconnected and now, I've never felt more a part of you than I do right now. Don't ever apologize for this, Edward, because this defines every choice I've ever made and every path I've ever taken to get to you."
I felt the ring on her left hand slide along my back, making my dick jerk violently against her soft skin. Her existence overwhelmed me, her love nearly destroyed me. "Put us back together," she begged, not releasing her grip on me for a second.
I ran my hands along her muscles that were shaking with exertion, pressing kisses along her arms, shoulders, chest and neck. I smelled the salt of her tears before they fell, her eyes gazing up at me unblinking as she loved me by sight alone. My hand slid between us, her breathing picking up every-so-slightly as I reached her clit and drew firm passes along it, reveling in the way her blood raced through her veins in exhilaration. As much as I loved hearing the proof of her life and coveted tasting her blood on my tongue, I was so eager to give it up. It was such a small price to pay when the result would be her forever…our forever.
I wrapped my fingers around my erection and dragged the head of my cock up and down her slit, our breathy moans pouring into each other's mouths as we lost ourselves in the sensations of pleasure. Slowly, ever-so-slowly, I carefully pushed inside her, stopping once the head of my cock was nestled just inside. Our foreheads pressed tightly together as I slid both hands behind her back, crushing her to me and leisurely sliding the rest of the way inside her body.
"Edward…every time," she breathed, wrapping her arms tighter around my neck and kissing me with a blinding passion that always seemed to take away the breath I didn't need. I shifted my hips back and slid inside of her once more, memorizing every inch, trembling with every movement we made against one another. I lived for the moments when it was wild and unpredictable, but there was nothing like connecting with my mate. Absolutely fucking nothing.
I felt her pulse thrumming rapidly from where I was buried deep inside her, reluctant to leave her succulent warmth when it was the only time I truly felt complete. I abandoned thrusting in and out of her, and instead swiveled my hips against hers so I'd never have to leave it, I'd never have to leave her as long as we existed on this earth.
Bella grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together, dragging them up her body until they were stroking along her neck. I knew what she wanted, and not because she got off on the pain from my teeth or the taste of her blood. It was because one day soon we'd never have this again, not exactly like this, and being connected by feeding off of her as well as making love to her…it was unlike anything I could possibly describe.
I kissed her passionately, our tongues slowly dancing together and tasting like they'd never have another chance. My lips slid to the corner of her mouth and then along her jaw, panting heavily against her skin as I made my way to her bite mark. "You give me everything, beloved," I whispered heavily, quickening my swiveling hips and moaning as her legs tightened around me.
I kissed her repeatedly against the mark on her neck that fed me, worshipping her and the act that continually brought us closer together. I slid my palms up and down her sides, letting my open hands explore every inch of her I could find. One day she wouldn't be this soft, but she would still be mine. She cried out beneath me and I knew she felt it too, her fingernails attempting to push against my back as she found my mouth.
"I want it so badly, baby," she cried, speaking frantically against my lips between kisses. "I want to be yours, I want you to make me yours."
I sighed, kissing her fervently in return. "Oh Bella, don't you see that you already are? You're mine…and it's going to happen when the time is right. Just give me a little more time, beloved, I promise it will be me turning you into my vampire."
"Hold me tighter," she begged me, her voice suddenly fragile and needy as she clung to my body with every ounce of strength she possessed. I held her too tightly, just as she liked it, and continued to press inside of her, our movements slow but heady and more intense this way. "I don't want this to end," she whimpered.
"Bella, just because our family is here doesn't mean we can't connect like this."
She searched my eyes as the tears rolled down her cheeks. "I know…but I don't want this part of us to belong to anyone but you and me."
"God baby, even if they heard this, even if they had an idea of what was happening right now, they'd never understand it. No one can have this but us, don't you get that? Bella this will only ever be ours…when that bedroom door shuts, everything else in this world ceases to exist. Don't let their proximity stop you from expressing yourself…we can always give ourselves to each other like this, regardless of who's surrounding us."
She nodded against my forehead and moaned breathlessly, pulling me tighter and shivering in my embrace. "I'm sorry I've been holding back, Edward. I'm so sorry…"
I silenced her lips with mine, unable to stomach hearing her beg forgiveness of something that she didn't even need to apologize for. "Don't you dare apologize to me, sweet girl. You've done nothing wrong. You have no idea how amazing you are. You don't know how desperately I strive to be a better man merely because you're mine."
She cried out loudly, struggling to bring our bodies closer together. "Please take it, baby. I need you in both ways. Please..."
I ran my thumb along her bottom lip and searched her eyes, stilling myself inside her body as I gazed at her. "Bella, I'm so in love with you…tell me you understand, because I can't find any other way to show you and this isn't enough…I love you, fuck, I love you…"
I felt us approaching that fine line as my words made her tremble so violently it began to alarm me; our descent into loving each other so much it was terrifying was well on its way. I hadn't felt exactly like this since we'd left Forks, but then again, my love had just admitted to holding herself back all this time. As much as I regretted that, maybe it was a good thing…this was the kind of love that had the power to destroy us both.
She repeated her love for me in slurred declarations, becoming fatigued from the heavy emotion mixed in with the overwhelming pleasure. "I'll bring us back, beloved," I whispered, kissing her bite mark once more before gently scraping my teeth back and forth along it.
It wasn't enough to break her skin, but as soon as I started she began clenching around me, her orgasm seconds away from unleashing on both of us. I could smell her thick, warm blood just beneath the surface, begging for me to indulge. In truth, it was calling for both of us, because it sustained Bella just as much now. And I was sharing her perfect blood with her tonight. With a heavy inhale I broke through her skin, her rich liquid coating my tongue in warm spurts. I drank from her incredibly slow, savoring the moment and letting the venom that was filling my mouth surge into her bloodstream. Everything about us was give and take; I loved knowing that while her blood was infiltrating my body, my venom was coating every inch of hers. Give and take…that's all we ever were.
I let the venom pour from my mouth, intermingling with her blood just like it was always meant to, as destined a pairing as we were. I could have gone on like that forever, putting my life into her body and vice versa, until she called out a silent plea from beneath me. "Let me taste it, Edward," she cried ever-so-softly.
I pulled her blood from her body until my mouth was full, covering her wound with my palm and leaning down until we were mouth to mouth. I breathed raggedly as I let her blood slide from my mouth to hers, feeding my human girl and gaining just as much pleasure as she from this indescribably intimate act. She swallowed and groaned in hunger and indulgence, seeking my tongue again and pulling more of her flavor off my skin. "I feel your venom in me, Edward. It's like lightning…it always makes me feel so fucking alive. God, I love you."
I groaned and quickened my thrusts as we moved together, my orgasm quickly approaching with her words and her blood and the irrevocable way that she trusted me with her body. Once she licked my mouth clean I went back for more, knowing that I would take from her until the last possible moment, because I would never fucking threaten the safety of my purpose, my light…
I gave her more of my venom because I wanted to claim her, I wanted her to feel me in her body like I always felt her. I took one more mouthful of blood and gave it to my love, pushing steadily in and out of her body as she undulated beneath me. She swallowed down her blood hungrily, gasping for air and shivering on account of her impending climax. "So close…so close, harder please, go harder…Edward, I need more!"
I growled desperately as I began thrusting in and out of her at vampire speed, diving my teeth into her neck once more even though I knew I was getting too close to a very dangerous point. I held the blood inside her body but let it sit against my tongue. I was so painfully aroused and fervently hungry for her that my venom was sliding down her neck, past her collarbone. I couldn't stop. I was lost, I fucking needed this girl more than anything else in this world and I just couldn't. Fucking. Stop.
And then she came suddenly, violently. She tore my orgasm from my body, her pussy clamping down on me and her body flailing as she clawed at me desperately. I groaned viciously against her bite mark, continuing to thrust fervently into her even after my climax had passed. I needed more, and so did she, begging for more blood, for one more taste, just one more taste…
And then she stopped moving.
Fear like I had never known before rippled throughout my body and I quickly sealed her wound, frantically looking into her wide, shocked eyes the second I was through. She was frozen in place, silent tears sliding past her eyelids as she stared up at me in a mixture of fear and excitement. "I don't feel right. Edward, I don't feel right," she murmured through barely-moving lips.
A dry sob tore from my lips and I began to panic, not knowing if I had hurt her, killed her…or if I had finally managed to begin her transformation. "I have to call Carlisle, Beloved," I choked out, running my hands along her sticky skin and praying to God I wasn't selfish enough to end my human girl's life. Not like this…I vowed from the beginning that our love wouldn't kill her, and I was so fucking frightened that it had done exactly that.
Her arms were weak as they wrapped around my neck, her expression suddenly terrified as she searched my eyes. "Don't leave me," she cried. "Please don't leave me, baby, I think…I don't know, I'm scared but it feels…wrong. It hurts so bad. Shit Edward, don't leave me."
Going against every bone in my body, I tore myself out of her embrace, ripping my jeans apart at the seams until my phone came flying out of them. I dropped it twice in my haste and shaking fingers, frantically dialing Carlisle's number before covering her body with mine once more. "I'm right here, Bella. I'm right here, baby. This has to be it…you're going to be my vampire now. This has to be it." My voice wavered as I begged for it to be true, that this was just the beginning of her transformation, and not the end of life for both of us.
Carlisle picked up immediately and I completely lost it, dry-sobbing into the phone like I didn't have a prayer on this earth. "Please come back," I choked, pressing my face into her neck to muffle my cries. You have to come back, Carlisle, I don't know what I've done…"
In mere seconds our call was disconnected and my human girl's future was flashing before my eyes. "Bella…" I whispered brokenly, pushing her hair out of her eyes and desperately trying to get her to look at me.
Her eyes bounced around a bit until they found mine, her bottom lip trembling as her hand reached out to stroke my cheek. "It's like a fire. I love you, Edward. Just hold me, okay? Don't let me go, I need you…"
Her heart began racing fast, too fast, and as I crushed her to my chest and sobbed desperately in the dark of night, I knew that this moment would either be the beginning or the end of our existence.
-x-
-x-
-x-x-x-x-x-
Hopefully the length and content of this chapter made up for the lack of a timely update. :)
I'd like to thank everyone who PM'd me, checking on the status of LB. I had a big month last month, good things and bad things happened. It's nice to know that you all still care so much about this story. Please believe me when I say that I will never give up on one of my stories. Never, ever!
Thanks to Isabel for being an amazing beta and friend! She always knows exactly what my stories need! :)
Feel free to follow me on Twitter, Brits23, and if you really want to be in for a treat, check out the blog that Lazykate and I have created! If you love yourself a little PFach now and then, you'll definitely want to check it out! Here's the linkie: http:/pfachwatchalong(dot)wordpress(dot)com/
Don't forget to follow PFachWatchalong on twitter as well! We'd really appreciate it!
If you have a moment, please send me a review? Big things are on the horizon for our Bitey and his beloved. I'm excited to hear what you think! Thanks again!