A/N: I now have 25 chapters! Woohoo!

…Yes, I know the word count is more important. I'm just happy. It's always good to stick to something, and 25 is a good milestone.

Zzzp2 is not responsible for any choking, heart attacks, or other laughing-related injuries that may occur as a result of reading this story. Read at your own risk!

Chapter 25: Quartering Clay

I got my dose of Fresh Water, and walked forward onto a lift. There were two buttons, an up, and a down. I pressed A in front of the down, and the lift slid down into a big shaft!

The shaft had several lifts, and girders separating them. It was all dug into the ground, and you could see the sediment going down farther than the eye can see or the screen could display.

'Tranquill: Ooh… scary. It's far down there!'

'Dewott: It is not scary! You're safe balancing on girders a foot wide above a gigantic drop!…Okay, maybe it is.'

The lift I was in was connected to two others, one of them being blocked by a cone. The other was blocked by a trainer. Who had a Palpitoad, a little poliwhirl wannabe with bumps on its head. Big ones. That made Tranquill's Air Cutter not do so much damage. OK, maybe it was the high Special Defense, but it sounds better. Muddy Water took out most of his health, and then the Palpitoad set up an Aqua Ring to heal his HP every turn.

We took turns, Muddy Water, Air Cutter. Uproar, Air Cutter. Muddy Water, faint.

…What? Tranquill fainted? Go, Dewott! Dewott used Razor Shell! It actually fainted the Palpitoad! Go, Drilbur! Go, Pansear! Go, angry mob of Klangs!

Pansear Flame Bursted the Drilbur, a drilling mole with steel claws, and grew to level 29, winning the battle for me. A trip to heal, and I headed down to the second level. That had another lift going up, in the sight line of a worker with a Sandile, Air Cut, and then Tranquill became confused due to Swagger.

'Tranquill: Oh hey! How'd the sandile GET ONTO ME! GET OFF!'

'Tranquill tried to peck the sandile!' read the text box. 'Tranquill hurt itself in confusion!'

'Dewott: Hey! Tranquill! Snap out of it! (and that's almost for sure going to fail)'

'Tranquill snapped out of its confusion! The foe's Sandile fainted!' read the text box.

'Pansear: …No comment.'

'Dewott: O_O'

Next up was a Drilbur. It fainted Tranquill. In came Pansear, with the 1 hit KO Flame Burst!

…make that almost KO, requiring another Crunch to faint.

'Tranquill: …I'm feeling real déjà vu. Did this just happen?'

'Pansear: No, couldn't have been two trainers with the same pokemon and tranquill fainting twice.'

Another trip to heal, and I headed back to where I was. Left from the trainer was some girders, and a lift. But blocking it was a trainer! He had a Krokorok, a brown and black lizard. The evolution of Sandile. The Desert Croc- OK, that's enough, mental pokedex.

The Krokorok led with Swagger, making Tranquill confused.

'Tranquill: What? How do these guys fit on me? This doesn't make any sense! He's way bigger than me! This is totally defying the laws of physics! Someone sue Aperture! And I don't even feel any heavier!'

'Pansear: …Wow. That totally fits the word confusion.'

Tranquill continued on her rant. 'So then WHAT THE *CENSORED* IS GOING ON HERE? …Did I just say censored?'

Tranquill managed to use Air Cutter successfully mid-rant. Twice. Before fainting, putting an end to my laughing.

In came Pansear, who Flame Bursted the Krokorok and brought on a new round of déjà vu.

This lift was connected to two others. I took the top one, bringing me up and facing another trainer with a Drilbur. The Fresh Water got used, to no effect as Pansear fainted. In came Herdier, who fainted.

A trip to heal was intercepted by a Sandile, a Palpitoad and another Sandile, all of which got Razor Shelled, getting to level 31. A random guy also gave me an Expert Belt. After this it was time to… Ugh, I still haven't figured out a good pun for Clay, which is kind of disappointing.

The elevator passed lots of fossils and sediment on the way down, stopping at a gate. The gate opened with some more angry Klangs storming off, leading down to a giant mine. Jewels came on conveyor belts and got carried up, and a couple of cones littered the place. And in the middle of it all:

Were the stairs.

But beyond that was Clay! And I walked up, saved, and pressed A with great aplomb, without considering whether it was possible to push a button with great aplomb.

Let the awesome battle music begin!

Clay sent out a Krokorok, and I sent out Tranquill.

Krokorok started out with the classic swagger, and Tranquill managed to pull off an Air Cutter despite the confusion.

Next up was Torment, which just makes Tranquill unable to use the same move twice in a row. Tranquill still managed to pull off another Air Cutter, getting Krokorok down to under half of HP. Next attack: Detect, avoiding all damage.

And then Air Cutter, but she succumbed to Swagger. Not the confusion, though, pulling off the third confused Air Cutter of the battle, and a Quick Attack finished him off. Or, would have.

DARN YOU HYPER POTIO- Quick Attack critical hit?

Clay used another Hyper Potion, and an Air Cutter and Quick Attack finished him off, getting Tranquill to a well-deserved level 28.

Next up: Excadrill, a giant metal-clawed mole wearing a metal hood. Tranquill never stood a chance against Rock Slide.

In came Dewott, who Razor shelled him once before succumbing to Rock Slides. Pansear came in to Revive Dewott, and Herdier gave him a Moomoo Milk. I also had time to Revive Pansear before Herdier fainted.

Dewott came in, and in one razor-tipped slash fainted the giant metal mole. Pansear also got to level 30. The last pokemon of Clay's?

The ground type emolga, Palpitoad.

'Dewott: …OK, that's ugly.'

It used Bulldoze, a earthquake wannabe, putting Dewott into the red.

'Pansear: You can do it! I know it's cliche but you can do it! Hit him with a Razor Shell!'

Unfortunately, the random number generator (RNG) had other ideas, as Bulldoze got a critical hit.

It was all down to Pansear….

Who revived Dewott and fainted. Dewott used Razor Shell and in one fell swoop- or swing, winning the battle for all of us.

Clay gave me the Quake Badge in that neat animation, but forgot to give me the TM, instead wanting me to head to the cave on route 6. So I headed up, past all the sediment, to find the cone gone.

'Pansear: …Why…couldn't…have…you….have…done…that…earlier?'

'Tranquill: I…could…have…eaten…it…I…was…hungry…'

'Dewott: HUNGRY?'

And that was how I exited the gym, with my pokemon arguing on the edibility of traffic cones.

A/N: Nothing to say or see here. This isn't the author's note you're looking for. Move along, to the review button. Move along!

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