Quick note, my beta did her magic, but I made some adjustments afterwards so any mistakes are probably from there.
IIIII
Chapter 25
Time and Kisses
Harry's polite smile was charming, his voice even as he talked to Fleur's dad through her, his posture perfect, his manners impeccable and his eyes warm. He kept an eye on Luna, who performed marvelously. Her job at the moment was focused on keeping Tom too busy to direct Grindelwald to his weak points. He was confident Kurt and Blaine wouldn't form a scene in public, especially next to the principal of the school. He just needed to make sure they didn't catch him alone tonight.
"So Harry, I heard you had to make a last minute trip to London recently" said Grindelwald with a polite, but curious tone.
Harry didn't tense, but his eyes darkened. "Personal affairs, so I hope you forgive me if I am unwilling to share the details" he knew it had been a lazy attack, intended to put him on defense or anger him. He wasn't naïve enough to fall for that.
"Of course, forgive my intrusion" he said with an apologetic inclination of his head. "I do have to ask, where you able to catch up with the school work afterwards?"
"Certainty" said Harry taking a careful bite of his food and smiled to the rest of the table. "He is curious, because something like that would be impossible at Hogwarts. I will always be thankful for the foundation it gave me in regards to scholar pursuits. However, I am more comfortable at Dalton."
"Really Harry?" asked Grindelwald faking surprise. "I would have expected you to choose the most challenging institution."
Harry smiled. "Hogwarts is far from perfect Professor and while teachers like yourself, Professor McGonagall, Dumbledore, Snape and the rest of the house heads are fountains of knowledge and at the top of your field, you can't deny there have been a few decisively questionable choices."
"Oh" said Grindelwald intrigued and there was a lull signaling the not so discreet eavesdropping from the rest of the table. "Do tell Potter…"
"Lockhart for example" said Harry rising an eyebrow challenging and unwilling to back down. "That man was useless" the whole table stopped, some of the guests completely shocked by his audacity. "His teachings were outdated and invalid; he was a simpleton and a charlatan to put it lightly. The only possible uses I could find for his book were to fix my nightstand, be recycled and for the fireplace during winter. After his first class I was asked to leave and report to Professor McGonagall for insubordination… it's hardly my fault he was unable to receive constructive criticism."
Nobody dared to move except Harry and Luna, who carried on eating like nothing had been said. Grindelwald finally cracked a smile.
"Oh, I am sure Minerva was delighted to hear that come from a 12 year old" he said with a deep laugh.
"She did give me a biscuit and tea during my detention while she gratuitously pretended I had any hope of arguing with her about the Shakespeare debacle" said Harry with a playful smirk. "I think the conversation was painfully dull and redundant for her, but she pointed me in the right direction."
"I'm confident she was entertained by your attempts" said Grindelwald. "Minerva can be quite a force to reckon with, she argued vehemently about her displeasure when Lockhart was added to the staff."
Harry smirked playfully. "Looking back on it, I'm pretty sure she was either blatantly encouraging my rebellious ways or grooming me to be her right hand when she decided to take over Hogwarts."
"You would have gone against Albus?" asked Grindelwald with both amusement and surprise in his tone.
"For McGonagall? In a heartbeat; but only because Professor Dumbledore wouldn't really have minded as long as I did it in the name of a life-time supply of biscuits."
The table laughed at his playful tone, Grindelwald shook his head, knowing it wasn't really a joke. "How about you Mr. Riddle? Any interesting teachers?"
Damn him.
"Some more than others, but I am afraid I don't have Potter's knack for… unruliness" he said with a slight accusing look his way.
"It flatters me you have noticed" he said with fake coyness. Riddle scowled at him.
"Undermine their pompous authority, reject their moral standards, make anarchy and disorder your trademarks. Cause as much chaos and disruption as possible, but don't let them take you alive" recited Luna with a spark in her eyes.
Harry's smile turned into something different, warm and welcoming, but full of mischief. "Sid Vicious" he said with ease.
"I don't believe I am familiar with his work" said Grindelwald with a frown.
"He's a musician" explained Harry with a teasing grin. "Bassist for the Sex Pistols…"
Riddle made a face. "Of course he is."
"Harry here has an interesting theory about musicians" said Grindelwald. "Maybe you can convince him to share it; I'm always entertained by it."
"We are intrigued" said Fleur smoothly and giving him a charming smile. Harry almost laughed at her desperate attempt to insert herself in the conversation.
"He believes, and correct me if I am wrong, that musicians are the philosophers of our times" said Grindelwald lazily swirling his drink.
"And it's true" said Harry with a simple shrug. "Not every musician and band, but you can't deny the influence of some. Take the Sex Pistols for example. They had a very short career, only produced 4 singles and one album; still they practically started a movement and are considered one of the most influential acts in the history of music."
Grindelwald sighed with a fond exasperation. "I've had this discussion with you so many times, that I can't possibly find it in me to subject myself to the same torture again."
"Very well" said Harry with a smirk and turned to Fleur and her father.
God, he needed this to be over immediately because he could tell something was going to go awfully wrong. He turned when he felt Luna's change of mood. She had stopped talking to Tom in favor of tensely looking at the man to her left; next to her Kurt seemed to have been affected by whatever he was saying.
"What do you think sweetheart?" asked the man patronizingly.
Luna smiled chillingly. "Of course I would love to be a stay home mom, but I think I would have to wait before getting married."
"See? There's a girl with a good head on her shoulders" said the man satisfied. "I'm guessing you will wait until you finish college?"
"Oh no, I wouldn't mind getting married younger, but I think I'll want it to be legal in all states first" said Luna calmly. "I don't really need a piece of paper to tell me my relationship with my partner is solid, but it would make the adoption process so much easier you know?" her voice dropped a little, to a more childish tone. "For my wedding, I want to be free of any gender-stereotyping. I want to get married in Scotland and have all the men wearing quilts and the girl's black suits, except me and my girlfriend, we'll be wearing white."
"If you do get married in Scotland, maybe you should consider Hogwarts as a location" said Harry. "They rent the Great Hall for events during certain dates and the outside is gorgeous."
"It might be too soon to be thinking location" giggled Luna bashfully. "But I'll keep it in mind."
The man's face was priceless. Grindelwald didn't bother to point out you could only rent the place as an ex-alumni or a faculty member, which was enough for Harry to feel fondness for his mentor. Their eyes met and while his remained challenging, instead of the spark of excitement that he usually got, Harry found himself bored.
He glanced at Kurt and Blaine, both clearly uncomfortable, but having their own conversation with subtle looks and half smiles.
And there went whatever he could have managed to salvage of the evening. He didn't like feeling like an outsider, the evening was tedious and stifling. Fleur's hand resting possessively over his arm was the only thing keeping him in place. With practiced ease he shrugged off or redirected Grindelwald's digs. Even if the game was in place, nobody could force him to throw the dice.
He not so subtly shrugged Fleur's hand off. He didn't like the way she was attempting to stake a claim on him. He needed to get out, he was restless and irritated. It was only a matter of time before he did something stupid. Luna was giving him pointed looks, trying to figure out what the game plan was.
He needed an out, any excuse at this point would do.
"…and don't even let me get started with the spectacle of repealing Don't Ask, Don't Tell is turning our forces into" said the same annoying man from before.
"Then don't" Harry said glaring at him. The man gaped at being rudely interrupted. Painfully aware he couldn't out himself while Fleur was depending on him, he stood up. "I think, it's time for us to take our leave" said Harry coldly, giving the Dean a false look. "In the future Sir, I would recommend you think more carefully of sitting arrangements. Do also refrain from inviting me to events where the Dalton policy will be mocked by the people who are meant to support it in the first place."
He turned to Fleur and kissed her cheek, whispering against her ear. "Your dad is a well-educated man, who dabbles in international politics. I find it hard to believe he doesn't speak English; might want to take that into consideration dear."
Without sparing a look at anybody, he walked away from the table. Luna's arm smoothly linked with his on the way.
IIIII
"It was a satisfactory fireworks display" said Luna once they had collected their coats.
"Even if yours didn't ignite?" asked Harry giving her a look.
"The fuse was longer than I expected" said Luna shrugging. "Or maybe they have just exploded one too many times in your presence."
"If you want, you can go say goodbye to Sophie" said Harry. Luna smiled and winked at him.
"I do have your best interest at heart Harry" said Grindelwald coming to stand next to him and wearing a sincere look. Since Harry had refused to play the game by the rules, honesty was the only thing he had left.
"I know" said Harry tiredly. "But the life you want for me is not the life I want."
"You can't blame me for trying" he said guiltlessly. "You have so much potential that it'd be a shame for me not to fight for it."
Harry snorted. "I'll die before I'm 25, and when I do I'll have lived the way I wanted to" he said. "Also Sid Vicious, he was 22 when he died, heroin."
"Shining example of morality" said Grindelwald disdainfully.
"He might not have been a shining example of morality, but he lived what he preached and I respect that" he replied. "And you know what? Between living a long life your way or a short one my way, I would always pick my way."
"Alright, alright, I don't promise to stop trying" Grindelwald replied. His car pulled in front of them and they embraced. "I feel you should know Harry, that even if coming back to Hogwarts is not what you want, that's not your only option. Consider it at least, you owe yourself that much" he handed him an envelope. He looked at him uncomfortably before he said. "I never wanted kids, I still hate them in fact… but you are the only tolerable substitute I have found."
Harry looked at him with genuine affection. "Love you too G-man."
"Bloody brat" said Grindelwald with a sneer, he slammed the car door closed and Harry laughed.
"So, are we going to go pick you up someone tonight or what?" asked Luna joining him once she saw that the coast clear. "I have a very revealing back up dress that would fit the occasion."
"Nah, not tonight" decided Harry, passing an arm around her shoulders. "You know, there should be more girls like you for guys like me…"
Luna laughed. "In another life we are passionate lovers and soul mates."
"Hopefully" said Harry. "On this life, I guess I'll have to be satisfied with keeping you as my commander in chief."
"Uh" she said excitedly clapping her hands. "Do I get to dress up my own army? Can the uniforms be an expression of our decadent nature? I should start designing, if we try to take over the world before we are fashionably well dressed I'm going rouge on you. If I am the commander in chief what are you?"
"A faceless being, hiding in the shadows… probably too busy having sex to even notice what you're doing" said Harry smirking. "I'll take over the world, but I'm dropping it on somebody's lap as soon as everybody bows to my superiority. You're my first option so far, unless I manage to get rid of Hermione's conscience. I still think we'll need her on board to take care of the paperwork."
"What an interesting turn of events" said Luna amused. "The wicked guarding a conscience."
"Go to your girlfriend" said Harry messing her hair and quickly stepping away. He laughed at her enraged yell and rushed to his car. He was exhausted and really wanted to disconnect himself from everything.
He pulled his phone out, ignored the texts from the twins, Ron and Hermione, he opened Riddle's. It only had one word.
Even
He couldn't help but tease. You were a fabulous queen, we should play more often.
Unsurprisingly, he didn't get a reply.
IIIII
He parked and looked at the building in front of him. When was the last time he had been here? He couldn't remember and didn't try very hard either way. He fetched his keys from his pocked and took the elevator.
Once inside he gave a quick once over to the little studio.
It wasn't much and the rent was cheap. He could have gone for something a lot better with the kind of money he had, but it served its purpose. After all, the only reason he kept this place was to have somewhere to crash during breaks, holidays or break up funks.
He threw keys, wallet and everything in his pockets at the coffee table; he reached inside his suit and pulled the envelope, twirling it in his hands before breaking the seal. He sat at the sofa and started to read.
His phone woke him up the next morning and without answering he could tell it wouldn't be good.
IIIII
"Fleur, what the hell made you think it was a good idea to crash here?" asked Harry wide eyed. "And you three! Seriously? Couldn't figure out a better solution than sneaking her in?"
"Yes, yes" said Ron frantically. "This is all bad and you will kill us for not thinking ahead, but we need to get her out. If the teachers find her here we are dead."
"That bad?" asked Fleur looking at their grim faces.
"The people we went to dinner last night? Most of them are on the school board and well, you were there when I antagonized one of them. I'm already on rocky ground with him, the others might have been sympathetic, but if they see me blatantly breaking a rule about having girls in the dorms, when we are both wearing our clothes from last night… I can't say it'll be pretty" said Harry quickly typing in his phone.
"But they could…" started to say Fleur.
"Scholarship" replied the three redheads.
"We can't be caught breaking any rules…"
"Immediate grounds for expulsion…"
Harry gave the Weasleys a hard look. "If the teachers catch us, you hand me over."
"Harry!" protested the twins wide eyed.
"I'm serious" Harry said giving them a look. "You three stay here and if they catch us, you pretend you suspected something, that you were going to go to administration as soon as it opened or say whatever you want, but don't try to deny it ok? It'll get you expelled."
"We are not going to hand you over!" said Ron angrily.
"Yes you fucking will" snapped Harry as he typed on his phone. "Worst case scenario for you is getting spelled, losing your scholarship, getting a mark on your permanent record and being skinned alive by your mother. Me? Rich kid. One generous donation and I won't be expelled. I will politely be 'asked' to leave; they'll even give me a blinding recommendation letter for my troubles. Promise me you will or I will simply escort Fleur straight towards the board."
He didn't move until the three had nodded their consent, he threw each of them a tablet. "You know what to do. I already called a Swam Code, you'll do the monitoring from here, report to Luna, she'll direct me. She's already on line 2, Hermione is line 1" he grinned cockily. "If all goes well I'll see you at breakfast."
"And what if it goes wrong?" asked Ron resentfully, while the twins snapped into action.
"Then I'll be early for dinner" said Harry over his shoulder grabbing Fleur's hand. "We're going to be running, so you better know how to move on those things or get them off" he commented as he directed her down the portrait of the fat lady. Fleur looked at him challengingly, not moving to take her shoes off. Harry shrugged and focused on activating his ear piece.
"1, 2, 3, Leo here taking possession of line 3. Hare are you there?"
"Present and mad as ever" came the cheery reply. "The map is up and running, ready when you are oh fearless leader."
"I'm in your hands" said Harry ignoring Fleur poking him and demanding an explanation. He was mad at her already, first dragging him into her lie and then coming to crash at his dorm in Dalton. He reminded himself that being angry wouldn't solve anything and would make him sloppy. Taking deep calming breaths, he let himself focus on the situation, considering every angle. He smirked to himself unable to completely stop the giddiness and thrill from showing.
"It's been a while since we last danced" said Luna with a giggle. He wasn't the only one looking forwards to this then.
"Let's hope you haven't forgotten the steps"
"Hermes" acknowledged Harry.
"Take the west corridor and turn right at the end. We got eyes on the Red Road, negative on the Yellow. You'll have to go blind if you find invisibles on your way. We are aiming for an exit through the Chemistry department" came Hermione's sharp reply.
"Copied" said Harry and pulled Fleur. "Come on Odette, we're breaking you out."
"Vous êtes tous fous" muttered Fleur rushing after him.
IIIII
"Shit" hissed Jeff jumping to his feet and rushing out of the practice room, almost barreling Blaine and Kurt in his haste.
"What's up with him?" asked Blaine to Nick who shrugged.
Not raising his eyes from his phone, he added in a flat tone. "He's weird like that sometimes, I worry, I really do…"
IIIII
Harry entered the cafeteria as casually as he could. He ignored the way the other students were looking at him. He took his seat next to Ron and in front of the twins and sighed. They looked at him, he looked at them and Ron was the first to break eye contact. Grabbing a knife he started to lightly tap it against his glass, the twins quickly following his example.
It wasn't long before all those in the know joined in.
Harry tried to keep a straight face, but finally he sighed grabbed his glass and raised it in a mock toast, giving a nod to nobody in particular.
"So, does this one make it on the book?" asked Ron with a whisper.
"Definitely" said Harry giving him a tired smile.
"Hermione will be here to yell at us at some point today" said Ron, so used to his girlfriend's temper this didn't even make it into his radar.
"Well, if we are fighting against Hermes, then I say every man for himself" said Fred immediately.
"Eat fast and enough to last a few days if it comes to that" added George.
"I just want to go to bed…" moaned Harry in despair.
IIIII
"You are considering moving away!?" yelled Hermione staring at Harry incredulously and waving the open envelope in front of his face.
Harry groaned, covering his head with a pillow. "Ron sold me out didn't he?"
"He mentioned you crashed here last night" said Hermione. "Don't change the subject!"
"What are you doing here?" asked Harry instead, plotting ways to get back at his friend. No wonder he had looked so relaxed at breakfast.
"I was coming to see if you wanted to grab coffee or make plans for next week, then imagine my surprise when I found this!" she grabbed the pillow and yanked it away from him. "Are you going to be here next week? I mean, I'd like to know if one of my best friends is going to relocate to the other side of the world!"
"I'm not moving" said Harry frustrated. "It's just an abstract concept. It was tempting and I considered it for like a second, but I am not moving Hermione."
"So you keep a brochure of a foreign school and their letter of acceptance because…?" she asked stretching the last word.
"First of all, I only got that yesterday so it's not like I've been holding on to that for months. I'm just…it feels good to imagine myself away from all this. It helps knowing that if I wanted, I could leave" he explained while rolling out of bed and going to the kitchen, getting himself a drink. She frowned but didn't comment on that.
"I hate seeing you doing this again, it's barely lunch time" she said sadly. "You're far too young to become an alcoholic."
"It's butterbeer" he said with confusion. Her face remained blank. "Bloody American" he mumbled fondly and grabbed another bottle. "Here, try it…"
He dropped on his sofa carelessly, smirking at the pondering face Hermione had. "Alright, maybe just one" she said after tasting it.
IIIII
"Your so stupid" said Hermione giggling.
Harry chocked on his drink. "Your Hermione? Don't you mean you are?"
"I'm what?" asked Hermione trying to raise herself from her position on the floor.
He snorted again. "You are drunk. How many did you drink?"
"This many!" she said raising one hand with her palm extended, she stared at it and frowned. "But more…"
"Ok, I'm going to make you some coffee and put you to bed" said Harry carefully. He stood up and went inside the small kitchen.
Getting Hermione to sober up a little was challenging, but eventually she started to become more coherent. She hummed cradling her cup of coffee and looked at him. "It's your fault you know?"
"What's my fault?" asked Harry in the middle of texting Luna to insure Hermione had an alibi for tonight.
"They all cheated on you" she said resting her head against the wall. "But it's partly your fault, cause you started dating them…" Harry tensed, but remained quiet. "You make terrible choices, I mean, like, that guy from England. He was in denial about being in the closet and it was going to end badly, I knew it and I wasn't even aware you existed… then Ginny… you guys were terrible together…like really, really bad."
"Thank you Hermione" said Harry sarcastically.
"But like so bad" she carried on. "You are both like, what's that thing? The greenish rock-ish thing that hurts Superman?"
"Kryptonite?"
"Yes!" she yelled. "Your so smart" she declared and nodded. "That's what you guys were. Don't get me wrong, you had your moments, but it wasn't meant to last. You are both stubborn and hate being told what to do and love being in control… you weren't going to last and I knew, but I was afraid of losing you and Ron, you know? 'Cause if I said something you were going to take her side 'cause you liked her and Ron 'cause it was his sister and you're so stubborn Harry, so you weren't even going to listen so I just let things happen and I'm sorry 'cause it hurt you and I should have done something."
"It's ok Hermione" said Harry sitting on the floor next to her and bumping shoulders. "For the record, I would have listened, ignored you too probably, but I wouldn't turn my back on you, never. That's why I'm staying. For you, Ron and Luna."
"And the twins?" she mumbled.
"Nah" said Harry with a smirk. "They are good on their own. They don't really need me."
"I need you" she said quietly.
"I need you too" he said and she beamed at his words. "How about Kurt?" he asked after a long period of silence.
"His heart was already set on Blaine, and you knew Harry, you've known for a while but you figured if you loved him twice as much, it would be enough" she sighed. "You fall in love with the wrong people."
"No" said Harry softly. "There's no right or wrong when you fall in love 'Mione… with Cedric, it wasn't meant to be love. It was sex and attraction. Stupid, but exciting and it was what I wanted then. The thrill of sneaking around and everything was new and so good… like really good… and I was a lot more flexible back then…" he mused staring at the floor.
"Spare me the details" she said rolling her eyes. "And then?"
He smiled nostalgically. "Then it was more. Lines started to get blurred and I know he felt the same way about me, but he wasn't ready to be true to himself and I can't blame him for that. I do blame him for stringing Cho along. That wasn't right."
"But you're ok with him never committing to you?" she asked gently.
"It wasn't quite love, it could have been if we had been more honest with each other. But really, I wasn't exactly gushing over wedding magazines and dreamily imagining our lives together" he said amused. "I never got to process it anyways; I mean… Sirius died 'Mione. What the hell did I care about some high school break up? I didn't have the energy to feel hurt about him when my life was falling apart on a bigger level."
Hermione nodded understandingly. "Then you moved."
"Then I moved" he repeated. "And you're wrong about Ginny too you know, we weren't terrible together… she was exactly what I needed to get out of my funk. She was so passionate Hermione. It's like she was made of fire and I loved so much about her" he smiled. "She, she just made me feel alive and God, it was so easy to forget about Sirius and Hogwarts and everything when we were screaming at each other because we couldn't decide what stupid movie to see."
"By the time you agreed on something, it was too late to see anything" she recalled, remembering how her arguments with Ron seemed so small compared to them.
"I don't know what went wrong with us" said Harry shrugging. "I never bother to hear why she cheated on me. It was hard to stay away, especially knowing she wanted me back and I almost gave in so many times."
"Why didn't you?"
"It wouldn't have been fair to her. She didn't love me as much as she thought she did… and I didn't love her as much as I thought I did. I loved the idea of her, I love how she made me feel, I loved her family… and I loved her, but not as much as I loved those other things" Harry reached out for the half empty bottle of Butterbeer Hermione had abandoned early and started to peel the label.
"You wanted Cedric and in some level you came to need Ginny" said Hermione with a sudden understanding. "How about…"
"I love Kurt" said Harry with a clear sure voice. "He is interesting. I'm stubborn so I went after him without thinking too much about it and I ended up liking him a lot. But I don't need him and sure, I want him, but not like I wanted Cedric. Then I fell in love with him, and because I love him I want and need him… and because I'm an idiot I fell for Blaine too. I'm in love with them, and they are with me… but I can't seem to be able to go for it or let go, because…"
"You're stuck" she said resting her head on his shoulder.
"Because I am stuck" agreed Harry finishing the beer. "Come on; time for bed you drunken ho."
"Your the only ho around" she said with a gentle push.
IIIII
With how hard it had been to give the first steps to moving on, Harry wondered why he was here rubbing salt on his wounds voluntarily. He had purposely arrived early, his seat carefully selected to be on the second floor and towards the back where nobody would be able to see him from the stage. Luna sat next to him, staring at the ceiling in contemplation.
"Why don't you forgive them? And don't feed me the 'they betrayed me, woe is me' crap, you have a severe case of Loser's Lurgy and we need to treat it immediately before it infects the Robins."
Harry stayed silent for a long time, staring at his shoes.
"Remus... might not make it this time Luna" he whispered, grateful that they were the only people to have arrived so far. "Besides the fact that I still have trouble looking at them without getting overwhelmed, I can't help but think... what if Remus dies? I would have to go back to England to be there for Tonks and Teddy. I would probably have to end whatever we had managed to save from this whole wreck, and what would be the point? It isn't worth it, not when I am still feeling so hurt and… it's exhausting Luna, I am just too exhausted to put any effort into making things work."
She stared at him and raised an eyebrow. "You've never been a quitter... not when it counts."
Harry shrugged. "Teddy will always come first for me and the kind of relationship they want is not something that will work. It's naïve to think otherwise, especially with how things ended."
"Don't build things over collapsed foundations" she advised. "That's where Umgubular Slashkilter are born. You are hurting them and yourself" replied Luna grabbing her bag. "If you do forgive them, the Nargles keeping you up at night will turn into sparkling dust. We need more sparkling dust in the world Harry."
"I'll keep it in mind... don't tell Hermione I was here, or anybody for that matter, please?" he asked with a small smile her way. Luna was in many ways the friend he would always depend on when things became too much. She never judged and probably understood him the best and if she didn't, she tried.
"You are not really here anyways" said Luna while moving towards the stairs. She turned around and studied him. "You do look an awful lot like my friend Harry thought. He hasn't been around for a while, we do miss him. I believe he has a Gulping Plimpy in his mouth and hasn't quite figured how to swallow it yet."
"I'll keep it in mind" he repeated with a laugh.
"I reserve the right to have a private talk with both of them on behalf of all of us if…" she started to say sweetly and with an innocent smile.
"I don't know if there's an if to be worried about" said Harry tiredly.
"Maybe you should, it's hard being happy when you're so settled in making yourself miserable" she gave him a pointed look and walked away.
He remained uninterested in the first group, the song selection sucked. He didn't have anything against the song in particular, but well... they sucked. Their dancing left them out of breath and the group could barely keep up the vocals to match their fast paced routine.
He hunched over in his seat slightly when the Warblers were announced. He saw Kurt and Blaine scanning the faces in the crowd hopefully, but they didn't think to look up. The song started and Harry's breath was taken away. He had spent so much time being angry and resentful that he hadn't really stopped to look at them in a while.
They sounded broken, their cover of 'Candles' striking everybody by the pain they were projecting to the audience. The two of them exchanged a few meaningful glances, but Harry could see they were trying not to break down in front of everybody. He was grateful their second number was cheerful or he might have done something stupid. When everybody stood up to clap, he walked outside.
Watching Kurt and Blaine sing a duet should had made him angrier; instead it shifted something inside of him. Harry's anger was suddenly too heavy and suffocating. He was tired of pushing them away. He was tired of playing the victim.
He needed to think.
He walked two blocks to get his bike. He drove deep in thought and was grateful that he had the room for himself. He had some serious reflecting to do.
He had a rehearsal on Monday with the girls and he wanted to be well rested.
IIII
"Great work girls!" Harry said happy with their progress. "Remember to arrive earlier tomorrow so that you can try on your costumes. Ginny! Can I speak with you?" They waited while the room emptied and turned awkwardly to each other for a second. "Your solo needs more work" said Harry finally.
"What do you mean?" asked Ginny turning defensive.
"Look Ginny, you have a great voice and the dance is perfect, but you need to put a lot more emotion behind it to make it work" said Harry patiently. "Most of Vocal Adrenaline's performances don't have the kind of passion that I know you can put into it" Ginny looked away. "You open the show Ginny, you are going to set the mood and I know you can do it..."
"I know how to express myself dancing, singing is just... not me" mumbled Ginny.
Harry snorted. "Ginny, you can do it, just connect with the music. Figure a way to make it real to you."
Ginny stared at Harry and nodded, leaving the room in a hurry.
They practiced it again the next day and Harry could tell Ginny now found what she needed to make the song work for them as it was meant to. He and Allison, whose vendetta against Dakota Stanley had inspired her to create a truly terrifying dance routine, drilled the girls relentlessly for the rest of the week. They had their competition that weekend and they needed to be as prepared as possible.
IIIII
Vocal Adrenaline was good.
They had a great singer, amazing costumes and great song selection; however Harry felt it was lacking a certain spark. They had forgone their complex choreographies too, which was slightly disappointing. He wanted to win against them properly. Their performance had been nothing like the Bohemian Rhapsody number they did last year. He felt their main singer was not confident enough to carry the whole performance on her own. They had gotten confident and underestimated their competition.
Still, the public loved it and he assumed that the judges had a similar reaction. All in all, things could go either way. The school for the deaf did a cute version of Imagine, which touched the audience, but was unlikely to win.
He took his seat moments before the girls were meant to start. The Weasleys, Katie and Angelina sat with him in the same row.
"Good luck" whispered Ron to him. Harry rolled his eyes and suddenly the lights went off, except for a single spot light where Ginny stood, staring painfully at the audience.
She started moving softly.
"I... I am a dancer. That's who I am, what I do" she swayed as she carried on with the lyric, her face full of longing. "I...I am a dancer, give me the steps, I'll come through"
She smiled and the music picked up, she started a series of complex steps while she carried on with the lyric perfectly, making the audience lean forwards and suddenly she stopped. Her eyes found Harry and locked there.
"Let me dance for you" she sang fiercely, with a begging quality to it, she moved to the edge of the stage. "Let me try. Let me dance for you!" her voice was full of passion and emotion, it almost broke towards the end, but it made the performance more believable. "We made a lot of music dancing you and I..."
Ginny had managed to add the necessary emotions to her voice to make the act captivating. Her dancing skills were as amazing as ever and Harry got goose bumps and suspected he was not the only one. Ginny started a seemingly never ending pirouette as the music changed drastically. The girls appeared from the sides, dancing perfectly in sync. The song mixed with The Killers 'Human' with Hermione and Laura sharing the lyrics.
"We made a lot of music dancing you and I..." sang Ginny with bright eyes and still staring at Harry.
"Are we human..." sang Laura with a sort of angry quality in her voice.
"Or are we dancers..." left Hermione open in a more wondering tone.
Harry smirked. They were good. They were really, really good and the best part was about to start.
Luna grabbed his hand and squeezed before standing up on her seat.
"I'm leaving tonight. Going somewhere deep inside my mind" she sang with a lot of emotion. She related to the lyrics well. She was already moving to the stage, the girls harmonizing in the background in true acapella style, but without forgoing the instruments completely.
Luna seemed to pierce straight to Harry when she practically belted the chorus in anger, the girls backing her up.
"What I'm gonna live for. What I'm gonna die for. Who you gonna fight for. I can't answer that..."
IIIII
"Nice trophy" said Harry leaning against the doorway of the greenroom.
"Harry!" yelled a few of the girls at the same times. He laughed and entered, he got several hugs on the way and congratulations.
Hermione clapped her hands and the rest of the girls followed, making Harry duck his head in embarrassment and rub his neck awkwardly.
"I would like to have a thank you dinner for you tomorrow at Vienna" said Hermione softly, to make sure none of the other girls heard. "Just the gang"
"Sounds good" said Harry smiling, knowing Hermione needed to do something to show her appreciation or it would drive her crazy.
"I'll make the reservation" agreed Hermione smiling.
"You... you should invite Ginny" said Harry, making Hermione turn to him surprised.
"You two aren't..."
"No, of course not" denied Harry. "But she used to be part of the gang and we are both over what happened between us."
"That's very mature of you" said Hermione nodding. "Now go back to where you were sitting, we have to change and it'll be easier to find you all there."
"We could also…" started to say Harry but then he heard somebody zip down their dress and he left without further arguments.
IIIII
There was almost nobody left in the auditorium. Harry leaned against the chair, with his arms crossed and a resigned expression, while watching Fred and George recite poetry to each other; Ron rolled his eyes at them embarrassed.
The speakers came to live and he turned in surprise when the spotlight focused on him.
"I'm nothing special; in fact I'm a bit of a bore. If I tell a joke, you've probably heard it before. But I have a talent, a wonderful thing. 'Cause everyone listens when I start to sing, I'm so grateful and proud, all I want is to sing it out loud"
Harry stared at Hermione confused for a second. She was on the stage singing directly to him and a slow feeling of dread filled him. They wouldn't? Would they…
"So I say, thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing. Thanks for all the joy they're bringing. Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty. What would life be? Without a song or a dance what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me."
The Robins' started to approach him from in between the empty seats, singing in perfect harmony. They were out of their uniforms and in normal clothes, looking relaxed and happy. It was hard to feel anything but overwhelmed when they all seemed honestly thankful.
"Mother says I was a dancer before I could walk. She says I began to sing long before I could talk, and I've often wondered, how did it all start? Who found out that nothing can capture a heart. Like a melody can? Well, whoever it was, I'm a fan."
Sang Ginny from the public entrance; making Harry turn around to see her. They all smiled and sang sweetly together.
"So I say, thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing. Thanks for all the joy they're bringing. Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty. What would life be? Without a song or a dance what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me."
Luna sang the next part from the hallway, already close to him and he couldn't help but pass an arm around her shoulders when she was close enough.
"I've been so lucky, I am the girl with golden hair. I wanna sing it out to everybody. What a joy, what a life, what a chance!"
He laughed, kissed Luna's temple affectionately. On the final chorus, all of them, including Ron, the twins, Angelina and Katie joined them at the top of their lungs.
"So I say, thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing. Thanks for all the joy they're bringing. Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty. What would life be? Without a song or a dance what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me."
The girls smiled brightly at him before with a mischievous spark started chorusing.
"We are not worthy! We are not worthy!" they say bowing to him with their hands extended several times.
"Ha, ha" said Harry rolling his eyes affectionately. "Very funny…"
IIIII
On the second floor, Rachel watched Kurt close his eyes pained. She didn't say anything when the grip he had on her hand turned painful.
IIIII
Finn cursed and pulled over to the side. His mom's car had started doing weird noises for a while. They had sent him to pick up Kurt, while his stepbrother's car was ironically being giving a check-up. It was 7 already and he knew someone was going to kill him, possibly Burt or Kurt or his mom. They should be back already.
It wasn't his fault that Quinn found out he had the car for the day and sent him to pick up her backup prom dress. Or that he got lost and now the car was dying on him. He pulled over as close as he could to a restaurant. Hopefully with so many people around nobody would try to rob him. He pulled his phone and called Burt resigned to get an earful.
"Finn? Finn where are you? Kurt called to say you haven't picked him up yet, did you forget?" the voice clearly said there would be consequences if he had.
"No! Mom's car started making noises and there's a lot of smoke, like when I put my homework in the oven to dry the ink faster. It's too dark to check out the engine, so I don't know what to do."
Burt sighed on the other side of the line. "Where are you?"
"I am not sure... I pulled over in front of a restaurant."
"Ok Finn, I'll go to the shop and get the truck to tow you over."
"Oh... why isn't it at home?" asked Finn curiously.
"Because I drove Kurt's car here" replied Burt with an exasperated sigh. "While I do that, go inside the restaurant and ask them for the address, and call your brother and see if his boyfriend can give him a lift to where you are or to Lima..."
"Who?" asked Finn confused; Kurt had to have told Burt about the break up... It had been almost two months after all or a month and a half like Kurt snapped each time somebody mentioned it. Except he never heard Burt or his mom saying anything about it so they probably didn't know.
"Harry" replied Burt with grunt. "Finn that memory of yours is really starting to get worrisome. Tell Kurt that if Harry drives him to Lima he can stay over, that should get them here without complains."
Burt hung up and Finn quickly called Kurt. "About time, are you outside?" answered Kurt in his bitchy tone.
"Uh, not really, mom's car died, Burt is on its way to get me and he told me to tell you to tell 'your boyfriend' to drive you to where I am or to Lima... I didn't say anything, but dude! What the hell? Burt doesn't know?"
Kurt was silent, as in dead silent. "How can I tell my dad that I cheated on my boyfriend?"
Finn felt a little guilty, if he hadn't seen Kurt arriving in tears, sobbing desperately, he would have probably been less willing to cover for Kurt. "I get it ok? But dude, heads up next time. I can't cover for you if I don't know what I am supposed to cover for!"
"Thanks Finn... Where are you? I'll ask somebody to drive me."
"In front of a restaurant, it says Vienna on the outside. Burt told me to go inside to ask for directions."
"Don't bother" muttered Kurt sadly. "I know where it is, I'll call dad and explain how to get there."
IIIII
Finn stayed inside the car waiting for Burt to pick him up. He was starting to get hungry and considered entering the restaurant, however it looked kind of expensive and he was saving all his money to rent a nice tux.
He watched as a group of pretty girls arrived and wait at the entrance of the restaurant. They were all dressed up and looked kind of familiar. It wasn't long before a group of guys arrived. The red heads made Finn realize why they looked familiar. They were all Harry's friends. He frantically tried to spot him unsuccessfully. They disappeared inside the restaurant, leaving Finn unsure what to do and with an uneasy feeling in his stomach.
IIIII
"Hi Ginny" answered Harry, not sure what to expect from the call.
"Hey Harry" she said unsurely. "Uh... how are you?"
"Good, you?"
"Good, good..." her voice sounded strained. "Look, I am not good for this small talk stuff. I want to talk to you, and I was wondering if you could pick me up after rehearsal and drive me to Vienna? I'll ask Hermione to drive me back."
Harry paused and considered the request. "Alright, what time do you finish?"
"Six" she said. "See you soon."
IIIII
"Hey" said Harry from inside his car.
"Hey" repeated Ginny. They stood there for a few seconds. "This is not awkward at all."
"I've experience worse" shrugged Harry with a smile. She smiled back and entered the car. "So, what did you wanted to talk about?"
Ginny tensed. "I wanted to thank you" she said. "I've been missing everybody... I feel like I haven't seen them in ages. I share some classes with Luna and sometimes I eat with Hermione, Angelina and Katie, and obviously I always see my brothers, but... I feel things are different and I miss it. I miss hanging out with everybody, especially you, because unlike with everybody else we never see each other."
"Ginny..."
"No let me finish" she said and took a big breath. "I've never got to apologize, not properly. I did it because it was the right thing to do and because I was trying to win you back, but I haven't honestly apologized to you, so I am sorry Harry. I am really sorry for hurting you, and I am especially sorry for not coming clean about it from the start and letting people believe our break up was your fault for a while. I know we are never going to get back together and I've come to accept that. I hope we can be friends again."
Harry stayed quiet for a while, mulling over what Ginny had said.
"Why did you do it?" he finally asked, it was a question that had driven him crazy for a while and that still bugged him occasionally.
"He treated me differently" said Ginny. "Dean didn't see me as Ron's sister. He just saw me. For all your good qualities Harry, it annoyed me how protective you were of me and I think deep down, I would always be your friend's sister... I did love you and the thing with Dean was a spur of the moment decision the first time. I was mad at you for something, hell I think we were always mad at each other for one reason or another. I don't even remember, but Dean was there this time and he took my side. Everybody always took your side and he was the first guy that talked to me without making me feel young. After that it became a copping mechanism and I was never able to let go. It's not a good excuse or an excuse at all..."
"But it's what happened" finished Harry for her. "Thanks for being honest."
"I'm sorry" said Ginny a final time. "I feel horrible because I never really loved Dean, not like I loved you, but things were easy with him."
"I forgive you ok? We both moved on from each other and that's ok" responded Harry, looking straight ahead. They rode silently for a while. "Ginny?"
"Yes?"
"This is going to sound really weird, but... I think I know somebody you would like."
"It is weird" admitted Ginny with a nervous laugh.
"You brothers would hate it if you date him" added Harry.
"Mmmm... that would be a nice change. You came with way too many stamps of approval for me to enjoy sneaking around with you. Tell me more."
The rest of the ride was a lot more pleasant, both trying to figure out what pieces remaining intact from their broken friendship. It felt good to talk to Ginny again as a friend; he hadn't realized he had missed her so much.
He let her out before getting inside the parking lot, so she could get inside straight away.
He was making his way to the entrance when somebody called out to him.
IIIII
"Harry!" said Burt cheerfully. Kurt saw Blaine whiten and slowly turned around, knowing this was not going to be good. "There's no need to dress up to come for dinner, although I'm sure Carole and Kurt appreciate it."
Harry was sort of frozen, he glanced at Kurt, Blaine and Finn panicking and awkward faces and realized immediately that Burt Hummel didn't know. His expression tightened for a second, before smiling politely and shaking his hand in greeting.
"I am actually here to meet some friends" he explained pointing to the restaurant. "I don't mean to be rude, but I am running late already and it's..."
"Harry! There you are!" said Ron walking hurriedly to him from the entrance. He passed a friendly arm around his shoulders. "Common Harry, we cannot start the party without the guest of honor!"
Harry smiled apologetically to Burt, as Ron dragged him away. "It was nice seeing you again!" he said over his shoulder before muttering something to his friend.
"Oh alright, make sure you come visit soon! We haven't seen you in a while" said Burt. Harry awkwardly waved and Burt wondered why he was acting strangely, he finished hooking the car to the truck and distractedly saw through the window, at the end of the restaurant, Harry and several other people had small party hats and everybody was giving him hugs, patting his back or kissing his cheek in what he assumed was a congratulatory manner. "You didn't tell me it was his birthday" he said to Kurt. "Is that why you fought against coming home so much?"
Kurt stuttered. "I..."
"You know I like the kid Kurt, he's good for you" said Burt calmly. "You didn't need to make up excuses if you wanted to celebrate your boyfriend's birthday with him."
"Eh... sorry I guess" said Kurt awkwardly. His dad misinterpreted the tone of his voice for an apology, and assumed Harry's cold treatment was because he had forced Kurt to come back home instead of letting him celebrate with him.
"Well, the drive won't be too comfortable with three people in the truck and since this is a special occasion, you might as well stay" said Burt with a smile. "You can come home tomorrow before lunch."
"Uh... thanks dad" said Kurt with a strained smile. "I'll see you tomorrow then."
He hugged his dad and waved at Finn, who was nice enough to rush Burt for him. Once they were out of site, Kurt shoulders dropped.
"Let's go back" said Blaine patting his back. "We can put some movies and eat ice cream."
"Blaine" said Kurt as they started walking. "I... I don't think Harry will forgive us."
"No" said Blaine swallowing. "I don't think so."
They entered Blaine's car and they were soon on their way back to Dalton.
"I miss you" said Kurt in a soft voice. "I know we've been keeping some distance between us and hoping everything sorted itself out, but... I miss you, and the distance? It's not helping. I still love Harry and I still love you, and I miss you both."
"I miss you too" admitted Blaine. "And I miss our Harry"
"Our Harry?"
"Yeah... the Harry I see in the hallways, that's not our Harry" said Blaine more firmly. "That's the Harry Potter I was worried about when you started dating him. He drinks, he sleeps around and apparently he is smoking now. That's... that's not the Harry I fell in love with."
Kurt sighed. "Me neither... I think we might have lost that Harry."
IIIII
Having seen Kurt and Blaine had made Harry's evening slightly less enjoyable. A part of him had rejoiced in the fact that Burt didn't know, because it meant Kurt was still not over him. His head hurt from trying to figure out what to do.
He kept trying to put distance between them and every time he looked up, they were there. They had respected his wishes and had given him as much space as they could within Dalton, which made him feel like the universe was mocking him by shoving them in his face when he least expected. It also confused him a lot because he hated it. He hated this more than he hated having them following him around trying to talk to him.
On Monday he moved aimlessly from class to class. At lunch time he retreated to his, it still felt wrong to call it that, room. However his peace didn't last long.
"We have pizza" announced the twins and barged into the room, they were quickly followed by Ron, Oliver, Tom, Chad, Chris, Tyler, Seth and Jason. Harry couldn't help but smile at the odd mixture of friends.
"And beer" added Ron while opening the mini fridge to reveal it full of cans.
They didn't talk.
They ditched afternoon classes and miraculously, nobody came looking for them.
They watched movies (full of explosions, violence and body parts), played video games (full of explosions, violence and more body parts); they drank beer and got stuffed with junk food. Harry smiled at Ron and raised his beer in gratitude. The red head nodded and blew Harry's character head in response.
Nobody returned to their dorms, they found comfortable spots for the night or simply passed out where they were like Oliver. Harry stared at the ceiling, having lost his bed to somebody else and not caring enough to get it back.
It wasn't his bed anyways. It didn't feel right. He wanted to sleep in his bed again. He missed his bed, their bed.
He wanted to go home.
He stood up and silently made his way towards the fat lady exit.
"Harry?" he turned to see Ron watching him half asleep from his top bunk. "Where are you going?"
"My room..."
Ron woke up at those words. They stared at each other and finally Ron nodded, changing his side and yawning. "Good, sharing a room with you sucks."
Harry smiled in the dark. "See you tomorrow."
IIIII
He entered the hallway silently and was surprised to see Wes pacing the corridor.
"Harry" he said politely, he seemed uncomfortable and licked his lips nervously before seemingly coming to a decision and approaching him. "I know that what they did was wrong, and I know you are hurt and mad, but you need to talk to them. Blaine is barely sleeping; Kurt stopped caring what he eats weeks ago and is surviving on cheesecake. Now that the competition is over they lost all interest in rehearsal. David and I have been trying, but we aren't what they need. I know I am overstepping the line here, but can you talk to them? That's all, just…"
"Is Blaine in your room?" asked Harry impatiently.
"Yes" answered Wes. "David is with Kurt in your... his room."
"They aren't together?"
"They feel guilty rooming together" Harry nodded and walked towards Wes' room, the door was wide open and Blaine was curled up in one bed. He was drawing patterns on the sheets and seemed completely disconnected to the world.
"Blaine" called out Harry from the doorway and extended his hand. "Let's go to our room."
Blaine stared at him in confusion, before slowly moving towards him, afraid he would disappear and this was another nightmare. Harry rolled his eyes at the dramatics and pulled the other boy towards him. Blaine tensed for a second before melting in the embrace.
"I am..." he started, his voice breaking. He clutched to Harry's shirt and tried not to break down.
"Let's go to bed" ordered Harry. "We can talk later, with Kurt."
Too tired to argue, he nodded in acceptance. Harry kept a firm and reassuring arm around Blaine's back and directed him towards the end of the hallway. It was a little awkward because Blaine refused to leave any space in between them. Wes had already ushered David out. They were both staring at Harry relief evident on their faces.
Blaine moved like a zombie towards the bed, but didn't immediately get in. Instead he watched Harry with hopeful eyes. Kurt was sleeping in one of the bunk beds; he was hugging his favorite pillow and kept making distressed noises.
David and Wes closed the door silently behind them.
"Move the duvet" whispered Harry while taking off his clothes until he was only in his boxers, too tired to care that Blaine was there. He opened his closet, full of stuff he never bothered to collect and grabbed a pair of sweat pants.
He made his way towards Kurt and lifted him up easily. Blaine had the bed ready for them. Careful as to not wake him up, Harry put Kurt on his preferred spot against the wall. He slid next to him and the smaller boy immediately curled up to his side, letting out a content sigh.
Harry moved a lock of hair out of place and stared at Kurt's face. He was overwhelmed by how much things he was feeling at the same time. Something settled inside him, it was the first time he wasn't feeling restless, but there was still something missing from the picture.
"Come here Blaine and don't try to argue. You are in no state to do anything but sleep."
"I don't..."
"Blaine, get in bed" ordered Harry with a tone that left no space for arguments. Blaine felt a shiver down his spine and obeyed, resting his head against Harry's chest unsurely.
Harry embraced him and started to draw a pattern on his back. The same pattern he always drew on Kurt's hip bone. The same pattern Blaine had been trying to imitate on the bed sheets. Blaine closed his eyes and went boneless, all the tension gone from his body. Harry had never drawn that pattern on him before. He fell asleep instantly. Making a note to ask what it meant the next morning.
Harry stared at Kurt's vanity, more precisely at the mirror reflecting the three of them. Kurt and Blaine looked so peaceful. He could do this.
He could let things go and give it a chance. If he could start to feel whole again, he could do it. He wasn't ready to let them close enough to hurt him again, but he was pretty sure it was only a matter of time… and kisses.
But time first, before the kisses.
Fuck, he really needed to sleep.
IIIII
I'm sooooo sorry for the huge delay, but real life has been getting on my way. The next 2 chapters are already done, so I won't take so long to update.
Thank you, thank you, thank you to all the wonderful people that left me amazing, heartfelt reviews while I was on this unexpected hiatus. I feel awful that I didn't reply to all of you, but I promise I read everything and will try to be better.
See you next week!
SweetCaroline91
PS: About the ending/cliff hanger? I can only say finally.