LEGEND OF ZELDA TIME LOOPS: Crossing Between Worlds
Disclaimer: There is no dimension accessible to me where I own the Legend of Zelda, or any of the worlds shown in this chapter.
25.1 - (Tincanman125)
The Chalice of Zelda
"She's taking too long..." the Caberjack said.
"That's because she's more powerful than the others," the Hunter replied, "I believe she may be one of those 'Anchors' that Lord Belatucadros mentioned."
"I still don't trust him," the Caberjack said, "he could have just reforged us and lied about it, it's happened before."
"To what end?" the Hunter asked. "He has only asked us to continue what we've been doing."
"Look, I just don't trust a self-proclaimed War God," the Caberjack replied, "the suffering of war was what created the Cadence, remember?" She continued, "And these 'loopers' could just be part of whatever he's planning, we've been caught up in more elaborate ruses before right?"
"Quite," the Hunter agreed, "but enough of that, she seems to be Awake now, in both senses of the word; so I do think it is time to welcome our first visiting Anchor."
Princess Zelda had Awoken in an oversized throne surrounded by people staring at her.
She had been about to check her memories when some ridiculously loud horns sounded.
"Right, stop with the Horns of Birth!" A male voice said, seemingly originating from the oversized chalice she somehow hadn't noticed before.
"We don't have much time so I'll be quick," the chalice said, though in a female voice this time, "in a one word response, do you know how the terms looper, anchor, and branch are connected?"
"Yes." Zelda said.
"Good, that'll save us time." The male voice spoke, at which point Zelda noticed that a light emanated from the left side of the chalice, creating a silhouette of a male face. Idly she realized the same had happened for the female voice earlier, though the light had come from the other side of the chalice and the silhouette had been female.
Suddenly the loud horns from before sounded again, much to Zelda's confusion.
"Those were the 'Horns of Battle' this time," the female voice explained, "I promise we'll answer any questions you have later, right now you need to focus as hard as you can on The Chalice."
Though she was horribly confused, Zelda complied, and soon an image of warriors on a battlefield formed in her mind.
"Ok," the female voice said, "now that we're here, time is relative, we could spend hours talking and none of the heroes down there will have even blinked."
"Now then, time for introductions," the male voice said, "though we gave up our names when we became part of the Chalice, visitors such as yourself sometimes need to address us as individual entities; for those purposes I am known as 'The Hunter' and my counterpart is 'The Caberjack.'"
The Caberjack spoke next, "That's what we were when we were human, so you can just call us 'Hunter' and 'Cabe' if you want."
"Now who might you be?" Hunter asked.
"My name is Princess Zelda, Ruler of Hyrule." Zelda said.
"Well now that's out of the way, here's the important bits about our loop: you are linked to us, so as long as we exist you do too," Cabe said, "that being said, being bound to us means you can't leave the throne until the loop ends 300 years from now."
"Fortunately, we finally found a workaround," Hunter said, "we've built the throne into the floor and the back wall, thereby tricking the magic into thinking the the whole room is 'the throne' and have put everything you need in that room, with curtains acting as walls incase you need privacy."
"But why do you need an immortal ruler to begin with?" Zelda asked.
"Because we're at war, and, understandably, our citizens don't feel comfortable being ruled by a giant talking chalice." Cabe said.
"As for why it has to be an immortal, we need someone who can plan things out decades ahead of time, because our enemy, known as the Cadence, only attacks once every few years." Hunter explained. "Now then, we'll continue to explain things as they become relevant, starting on how to command your heroes in battle."
Princess Zelda was a natural at commanding her troops, the loops having enhanced her tactical prowess to unnatural levels, so she was done with the Cadence's Pawns in record time, and none of her troops had taken a single scratch.
She did notice something odd though, she'd been able to tell the ancestry of any of her heroes at a glance, and while not terribly fascinating itself, she'd noticed that three of the "bloodlines" had familiar names:
Hylian (alchemist), Gerudo (caberjack), and Skyloft (hunter).
"Could you tell me more about these 'bloodlines' please?" Zelda requested.
"Of course," Hunter said, "as royalty yourself, I'm sure you're familiar with the concept of arranged marriages and inheritance; as the leader of this nation you are required to assign a Regent to a keep, you will need to arrange a marriage for them with someone from a different bloodline, the couple will have children with random traits from the parents."
"Also, you should choose pairings carefully, encouraging traits like longevity and weeding out things like heart defects, there's going to be a big battle right before the end of the loop and you need the best fighters you can get." Cabe explained. "There's also a chance a looper might pop up now and then, this can be a mixed blessing. They don't have access to their powers, but it seems to translate over to a massive increase in all attributes instead. The downside is that they're infertile by default and their good genes can't be passed down, if they happen to be the last heir in a bloodline, then that line is dead if they don't adopt."
"However they can still train the next generation by becoming the Standard at a region's crucible," Hunter interjected, "or they can speed up research to breakneck speeds as Sagewrights."
"Speaking of bloodlines, yours is really powerful," Cabe said, "Thanks to being here you have heroic bloodlines from all of the families in your original vanguard, but somehow you carried over your baseline royal blood, magnifying your power further, and to top it all off, you're part of a divine bloodline, multiplying your power beyond anything I've ever seen. We had a hell of a time helping you manifest here, but once you did, it took everything you had before coming here and increased it one and a half times!"
"Had you access to your full potential we could wipe out the Cadence right now and stop any chance of them coming back, until the reset that is." Hunter told Zelda.
"I think I got it," Zelda said. "Basically, I have to bring out a bloodline's full potential, and if I see any loopers, use them for battle, then retire them to a crucible or the Sagewrights. And if it weren't for in-universe limits, then I could save this world alone."
Zelda cracked her knuckles.
"The more things change, the more they stay the same." She mused
25.2 - (Crossoverpairinglover)
"Hey look, Danny, a ghost!"
Looking up from the homework he probably should actually do one of these loops, the anchor/protector of Amity Park headed down to his family's basement. Once there, he eyed the almost cartoonish looking blond female ghost who was currently floating in one of his father's traps, unable to escape, illuminated by the Ghost Zone Portal.
As she pounded at the walls, his large, orange jumpsuit wearing father laughed merrily.
"It's cool, isn't it? This ghost says her name is Zelda or something silly like that! I can't wait to get to tear her apart molecule by molecule, dissecting her for all the ghouly goodness she contains!" He laughed as the little ghost's facial features quickly morphed into that of absolute horror "But first, I need to go find your mother. Dissecting ghostly molecules is what married couples do Danny, they don't teach you that in Health Class!"
As the large man bounded away with more energy than one would think, Danny eyed the ghost with a frown "So, are you Awake this loop? You're the pirate one, right?"
The ghost shook her head, looking lost and confused. Apparently, she wasn't awake this loop.
"Oh, what about the masks?" Again she shook her head "Can Link turn into a Wolf?" Another head shake. "A Painting?"
Strike four, he was definitely out.
But if so, what was going...
The sound of a train being very, very close at hand rang out from the Ghost Zone Portal.
25.3 - (Awesomedude17)
Zelda Awoke. She was in a Twilight Princess loop again, though her loop memories showed that Ganondorf was already defeated. This raised the question, 'why so late in the loop?'
Her concentration was interrupted by someone walking towards her.
"State your business."
"The Emperor, Kotal Kahn is here to discuss an alliance to protect each other from Raiden's wrath."
Ah, a Mortal Kombat loop. And one where Raiden's corrupted.
But who's Kotal Kahn?
Zelda nodded.
"Very well. I'll be in the Hall of Converse." Zelda got up and walked to the hall, where she and Hyrule would join forces with Outworld to make sure Earthrealm doesn't do any funny business.
It took her a few minutes to reach the hall, where a teal-skinned man in Aztec armor sat, sickles on back, and strange lines as well on his person.
"Greetings. I'm Queen Zelda of Hyrule."
"Thank you, Your Majesty. I am Emperor Kotal Kahn of Outworld."
"So, your predecessor has made threats of invasion for many years."
"I assure you that I am not Shao Kahn at all. His ambition brought the wrath of the Elder Gods upon him. I took the mantle from a ruinous tyrant."
"Mileena."
"Yes. She is dead."
Zelda nodded, internally worried about his brutal efficiency in keeping absolute power.
"I assume that there's people who have shown ambition against you."
"My former advisor D'Vorah. She betrayed me. The Earthrealmers imprisoned her. Shinnok is a threat no more."
Zelda closed her eyes.
"My ancestors were unsure of joining forces with Earthrealm themselves against Outworld. Why should we do so with Outworld against Earthrealm?"
Kotal Kahn sighed.
"I have seen many outcomes in many alliances, or lack thereof. I have gained foresight in my life, as well as hindsight. My mistakes live with me to my grave. My accomplishments beyond. I have known events that never happened, and yet have."
Zelda came to a realization.
"You're looping, are you?"
"So are you?"
"A pseudo anchor. Let's talk some more," Zelda grasped his hand. "In Outworld."
Kotal Kahn smiled. Another looper made a friend, in spite of his world's reputation.
Perhaps he'd get more answers too.
Like what Nut Kracker is, and why everyone says that it's worse than Eiken, whatever Eiken is.
25.4 - (Awesomedude17)
Phoenix Wright knew that there'd be some loops where he'd have to hurt something. He never liked violence, preferring the legal method better (especially the more fair types). But sometimes legality was a moot point. He would have to fight. It's why he really hated the Marvel vs. Capcom loops (that, and getting punched, shot, and burned a lot.)
This loop, he had replaced the anchor, or rather, a bearer of the anchor, Link.
So with blade and shield in hand, he set off to kill stuff, as he'd put it himself.
Link was always an action person. Sure, the loops where he wouldn't have to fight were always fun, but this time was different.
Lawyers were some of the most boring people he'd ever dealt with. It was a saving grace that he replaced Phoenix Wright, meaning that there'd be at least something interesting in court.
It was also a good thing that Link was good at listening to just the important bits. If there was filler, good, less work.
"Court is now in session for the trial of Larry Butz."
"The prosecution is ready, Your Honor." Winston Payne said.
"The defense is ready, Your Honor."
His first case, and his gut was feeling like a stab wound.
Basically, his natural reaction for this Loop.
25.5 - (ToaMataNui5000)
Link always found this fused variant interesting. Sure, he had no use for either the Soul Edge or Soul Calibur (not that they could be removed from this world in the first place), but competitively facing down opponents of various weapon styles to train off of was a nice change of pace. That was an idea that several loopers, like Kratos, Ezio, and surprisingly Yoda and Anakin, could agree upon. However, it was quite surprising to everyone that this branch seemed to lack its own loopers...
At least until now, that is. How could Link tell? His current opponent, a ninja known as Taki, was actually giving him a challenge. And a very aggressive one at that. He held up his Hylian Shield to block her incoming daggers, which he countered with a jab to the ninja's legs. As she staggered back, Taki threw a smoke bomb, which Link cleared with a burst of Farore's Wind. However, she was nowhere in sight. A roof shingle settling made Link turn, finding Taki diving towards him, an electrical aura surrounding her knives. He pulled out a clawshot, snagged Taki, and slammed her to the ground. He then approached the fallen warrior, and pointed his sword down at her.
"Concede?" The Hero Of Time asked.
"Not until I get answers," she groaned. She climbed to all fours, still gripping her blades. "You're the one causing time to repeat, aren't you?"
"Seriously! You've gone all these loops without even bothering to ask anyone until now?"
"I did! Several times over through various methods; Not all of them pretty."
"Including the ones that weren't here as often, much like me?"
"I attempted killing them all on sight, assuming they were the culprits. The black armored one and the small, green imp I could never even approach. The white one with tattoos always killed me first, and this is the first time you've ever actually spoken."
"Damn," Link was shocked by this turn of events. Going so long without even an admin explaining the situation, and remaining asleep whenever someone else was looping in. No wonder Taki took a turn for the violently desperate. "You need the speech badly."
"Do I look in a talking mood?"
"No, but neither do you seem to be in a fighting one. So I suggest you get comfortable and listen. You won't be a good teacher to Natsu if you can't be a student yourself."
"How do you..."
"I've lived long enough to fight your apprentice sometimes. She's practically a second Naruto. But that's besides the point. You see, it all began with a tree..."
When Link finished, Taki rolled her eyes. "You honestly expect me to believe that a whole multiverse is time-looping just like me, and it's because some tree from Norse mythology is broken?"
"I know it sounds crazy. Almost everyone reacts the same upon finding out. But trust me, it's true."
"Prove it."
Sighing, Link reached into his subspace pocket and pulled out a couple of items. One was a copy of Twilight Sparkle's introductory book, another was a pair of Taki's own blades. She obviously gasped. "What is this sorcery! How do you have copies of Rekkimaru and Mekkimaru!"
"I won them off an unawake version of you. As to how I pulled them out of the blue, I'll only tell you after you read that." He gestured to the book. And on that note, Link rose up to walk away.
"Where do you think you're going?"
"To handled Nightmare, so you have no excuse to not catch up on your research," Link chuckled. "Come find me when you've finished, so I can test and teach you more."
As the Hylian pseudo-anchor left, Taki sighed. "I miss the days where Volgo was the only outlandish thing here..."
25.6 - (wildrook)
"Of all the known Loopers to replace Volvagia," he said, looking at the man in the dragon-esque armor, "it HAD to be the Second Super Pervert."
GREAT WELSH VOLVAGIA
ISSEI HYOUDOU
Indeed, Link had expected something...LESS humanoid than the wielder of the Boosted Gear, who was clad in red armor in a stance similar to Captain Falcon's.
"I won't say it hasn't been an experience working with Gama-Sennin," Issei said, still in the Boosted Gear. "Heck, I wasn't even here to fight, but to talk. Then again, we're in the middle of a volcano, so I think we have to make it quick."
Link nodded as he looked around. "So, what happened to Darunia? I saw him head in to face you due to the whole Goron Crisis."
"If you're wondering if I faced him in combat," Issei replied, "then you'd be right. I Woke up as soon as he stepped into the field." Link cringed. "Yeah, imagine my horror when I found out I was being controlled by the Dark Lord and captured the Rock People, and I had no choice but to defend myself. I have to admit, even without the hammer, the guy packed quite the punch."
"Gorons are known for their physical strength," Link said, contemplating the weapon he was going to use against the holder of Great Red. "You didn't want to kill him, did you?"
"The man was a leader of his people and one of the more noble souls I've encountered," he said. "What convinced me to do so was that you'd be around...his Brother in Arms." Issei groaned. "Guess I've got no choice but to pay the piper, do I?"
"There's a time to mourn and a time to fight," Link said. "And mourning comes AFTER the fight. I know you're a nice guy, but considering what plagues this era, we've no choice. Besides, time can be rewritten...well, in this era."
Issei then gave out a smirk. "Maybe next time we meet, I'll give you a copy of the book Gama-Sennin and I made," he said. "And before you ask, it was approved by Hermoine Granger herself while discussing the philosophy of the Harem."
The urge to face-palm was great, but Link didn't have a moment to spare. "This raises questions I'm not in the mood to answer," he said, raising his sword as Issei took a fighting pose. "All I ask is that you don't hold back."
"If I have to honor the man's wish," Issei replied, "then go all out, explosives included."
Link and Issei then charged each other, knight vs dragon.
25.7 - (wildrook)
Link then smirked as he faced off against the Golden Ego known as Gilgamesh, who was replacing Ganondorf this Loop.
"Your kingdom is in ruins," Gilgamesh replied, "your weapons broken, and your Princess nowhere to be found. I demand to know, Mongrel, why you're still smiling when all hope is lost!?"
Link then slipped on a certain gauntlet-like computer and smirked. "Let's just say that I've learned a few tricks or two," he said.
Before Gilgamesh could reply, Link brought out a ball and chain as his glove turned into gauntlets.
What set the King of Heroes off, however, was the ball on the chain BARKING. Like a mongrel dog.
"What mockery is this?" Gilgamesh yelled, about to strike with Gate of Babylon. "You bring out some common pet to face me, the King of Heroes himself!? I will not tolerate this impu..."
Gilgamesh couldn't exactly finish as Link swung the Chain Chomp towards Gilgamesh. The monster bit into the armor of the King of Heroes, before Link twisted the monstrous chain to smash Gilgamesh into the floor as well as a few walls, the Chain Chomp barking along the way. He then left Gilgamesh on the floor, before bringing the Chain Chomp down in a meteor blow.
When Gilgamesh was confirmed to be in severe pain, Link retracted the Chain Chomp as the gauntlets turned into the unassuming glove.
"I love the Power Glove," Link replied. "It's so bad."
Gilgamesh was too busy wheezing in pain to respond.
25.8 - (Awesomedude17)
"So, I finally meet the infamous Gordon Freeman." Link remarked as he saw theoretical physicist.
"Yep, in the goddamn flesh, and you're Link, or one of those assholes that are just a different blonde guy with the same name."
Link paused, confused, considering that from what he had heard, Gordon was supposed to be mute.
But then again, so was he.
"More talkative than I expected."
"I-"
"Could say the same, I've heard that before."
"Hey, stop interrupting me, you bastard!"
"I'm armed with a sword."
"Well... I'm armed with a crowbar. Bet you didn't think about that, did you?"
"...The businessman that looks off took your guns, didn't he?"
"...Yeah, but he didn't count on the subspace pocket!"
"Okay..."
"Except he just teleports it away, so yeah, I don't even bother anymore and I have no idea who he is at all!"
"Or what he is."
"I'm not making assumptions, but you are."
"Really now?"
Gordon sighed.
"Fine, you're right. Jesus, you've seen what the hell I've seen, right? Holograms, aliens, army dumbasses killing each other, in my world, I'm the smartest. Really, I am!"
"Oh, quit your whining."
"I'm not whining, I'm complaining!"
"Like Rarity."
"Who?"
"Equestrian."
"Another mention of those fucking horses. I swear, if I end up in that horse world..."
"You do realize that you jinxed yourself, did you?"
"..."
"Twilight, there's a new looper swearing up a storm near the Everfree Forest." Rainbow Dash said.
Twilight groaned, and closed her book.
"Lemme talk to them."
25.9 - (Half Baked Cat and Awesomedude17)
Welcome to Night-Vale
In the Night Vale studio, Cecil and Malon sat as Intern Francis turned on the 'On-Air' sign and did a count down. When he reached 0, Cecil smirked as he leaned in and began the show.
"It is not too late to learn how to love and forget how to hate. It is entirely too early to forget how to hate. The veil of hatred protects those we love. Welcome to Night Vale."
With that, Cecil pressed a button to start the short intro music before continuing, "Today, dear listeners, we have a special treat for you. As you should know, if you have been listening to the midnight special previous recorded in another time and place broadcasts, time is looping for some of us. Some of us experience more loops than others. And today, we have one of these loopers in the booth with me. Malon, you know, the rancher. Welcome Malon."
"I'm glad to be here Cecil. You know, you remind me of some of my personal work," Malon pointed out.
"What kind?" Cecil asked, intrigued.
"Well, beside being a rancher at Lon Lon Ranch, I also do biological testing. My personal favorite is the Cucco-Tyranid hybrid I made."
"Tyranids? I don't believe I've ever heard of them. Mind explaining them to me?"
"Those thing basically eat things to assimilate their DNA, so I took one, and tried to make a hybrid between it and the Cuccos I had. The first experiments didn't go well... it ate them."
"Waste of perfectly good bird, I assume?"
"Well, the Tyranid died, after an entire horde tore it apart."
"What a shame. Anyways, I have found that many loopers have been unnerved initially by our fair little town. Normally they cite how we react so calmly to what they call 'disasters' and an 'oppressive, secretive government' . How have you found your stay in Night Vale been so far?"
"At first, I was a bit confused. Not scared, just confused. Hyrule is a world full of monsters so this town's basically that times four."
"If I recall, Hyrule is a large country with a city built around a castle and several small towns, while we are only a small town."
"Concentration of dangers. How neat. Anyway, this place was weird, but I managed to make a new friend already!"
"Yes, Carlos has told me about you and your... common interests."
"Don't worry, I think you're both a cute couple."
"Thank you very much, Malon. Carlos is my beautiful little scientist. Oh, how I love him."
"Cecil, your geekiness is showing!" Malon teased.
"Oh, uh... Well... Ladies and Gentlemen, I apologize for my brief moment of unprofessionalism, but you all know how I am around topics involving that dashing man."
Malon chuckled, right before Cecil continued.
"Anyway, Carlos and I exchanged hot-topic science tips, and gave him a name to remember so he'd find another science buddy."
"May I ask who?"
"Sakura Haruno."
Cecil's eye twitched and he cleared his throat.
"I... heard much about... her."
"Don't worry, she's better now."
"She still can have... moments..."
"...Maybe I should tell him that-"
"No no, I'll tell him, it'll be fine. Anyway, how about another topic?"
Malon cringed. She probably did something wrong here.
"Yes. Well, I have heard that in addition to raising those Cuccos, which, for those who don't follow Ranching Monthly, are a nigh-indestructible and short tempered chicken with the pack instinct of a pack of ravenous wolves, that you also raise horses. In particular, you have raised Epona, the horse many claim is the real hero of your home dimension."
"Of course. Link may be the one who holds the sword and kills the monsters, but how does he get to those places in the first place? Does he walk? No, he uses Epona. She's a strong mare, probably stronger than the Equestrians!"
"Who, if I recall, stopped the oppressive government of the one called Sombra many times thanks to these time loops using nothing more than a heart shaped piece of crystal."
"Well, it was the dragon, but that's besides the point, Epona is the one who brings Link to and from places, and has even kicked in some teeth too."
"Does she bite? Horses have bitten people before."
"Well yeah, she bit off a nose off a monster once. Said monster had information that Ganondorf, Unawake, mind you, was planning to steal the Triforce for his own needs... I don't know all the details really, all I know was that there was a new object called the guillotine, and they put it to use."
"Ah, the guillotine. I visited France once. They were phasing it out while I was visiting there."
"Yeah, I know how it works, but personally, I prefer raising animals. So Epona is the real hero of my world... unless you're talking about my admin, Epona in which she's the real hero of my world simply because she's making sure my world doesn't blow up."
"Admins, for the uninformed, are basically a bunch of gods that fix up the multiverse and are the ones who set up the loops in the first place. Thankfully, none are like the Smiling God of that Desert Otherworld. They tend to be more like the stories we grew up with. You know the ones where the Gods have a tyrannical , iron fisted government over the mortals while they drink wine and generally do as they want."
"Typical fare, really."
"Well, thank you for this interview. Is there any final things you wish to say to the audience before we go to... The Weather," Cecil asked, a finger over a button labeled 'Weather'.
"Yes. I'd like to thank you for this experience, and also, sorry."
"Sorry?"
"Carlos and I... kinda cross-bred the draconic mayoral candidate with a cucco."
A loud roar rang out outside.
"Apology accepted. And now, The Weather."
25.10
Link stretched as he stepped into the town square. "Oi, are you bothering this... butterfly?" He paused, looking rather confused. He had heard a voice shouting, and seen the two rough looking men in front of him responding in the middle of town, but he was somewhat confused by the fact that the one shouting for help was a small yellow butterfly.
The two men made some excuses, denying that they were causing any trouble, then declared their love for Dosh, apparently the local currency, and then left. Link shook his head and exchanged an amused glance with Navi, who he had met at the local Guild Office. Apparently, she was the local librarian, and had tracked him down upon receiving the Ping. Turning back, Link found the little butterfly floating directly in front of his face.
"Thank you for that! They really do mean well, but at this point, they are kind of rough around the edges. Still sweet, especially once we go save Chompy from the Doomstone. But I'm rambling, sorry, I tend to do that sometimes, I just get so excited about things, and I guess I should introduce myself, my name is Yuelia, and since I don't recognize you I'm guessing you are a Looper. Are you?"
Link blinked slowly, parsing through the high-speed wall of words that the butterfly had unleashed on him. Next to him, Navi giggled. "Um, yes. I am a Looper. Are you the local Anchor?"
The butterfly seemed to bob up and down in a parody of a nod. "Yep. That's me. I help the hero to save Reveria, though it seems to always be a different hero each time, and most of the time, they're a Looper! I guess I probably shouldn't assume that at the start, but oh well."
Navi smiled and chimed in. "That's really neat! I'm usually the guide for Link here, helping keep him out of trouble and everything. He certainly needs it." Navi and Yuelia both giggled at the mock offended look on Link's face. "I'm usually a fairy, so most Loops I get stuck being small, but don't worry, you'll figure out how to turn to human-sized in no time."
"Huh?" Yuelia wiggled a bit. "Oh, yeah, I guess I'm still a butterfly. I forgot about that." There was a twinkle of light, and the small yellow butterfly was replaced with a blonde girl dressed in a white dress and veil. "Ta-da! I just chose to go around as a butterfly to be more discrete."
Navi's jaw dropped. "But... wha... took me ages... you get it in Baseline...no fair..." her voice trailed off into depressed mumbles.
Link sighed, patting Navi on the head, while Yuelia looked politely confused.
25.11
"So, we're agreed then? Tomorrow, I'll set out to rescue Peach from wherever Bowser has stashed her, and you'll head out to get the Master Sword and stop Ganondorf."
"It's-a deal!" Mario grinned as he reached out and shook Link's hand. "And whoever manages to-a get back here first, wins!"
Link nodded, then the two headed out to prepare.
Link paused again atop a hill, pulling out a Magic Compass and carefully lining it up with his map. 'Let's see, so Peach is reading as being that was, which, when combined with my other marks... puts her right... there!' Link circled a small dot on the map, which marked the border town of Boom Shroom Town, right on the edge of Goron and Mushroom Kingdom territory. Dusting himself off, Link rolled up the map and started down the hill at a steady pace. 'Look out, Bowser, here I come.'
*Boing* Mario bounced, kicking off of a wall, and flipped up to a higher level. He paused in front of yet another intricately locked door. One good swing of his hammer took care of the lock, and Mario ducked through, racing at top speed along the newly revealed corridor. He had long mastered all of the little tricks for doing speed runs, and he wasn't about to let little things like proper dungeon set-up stand in his way. 'Look out, Ganondorf, here I come!'
"GAH!" Link yelped as he rolled to the side, barely avoiding one of the many energy spheres that were randomly bouncing around the room. Peach was off to one side, peeking out occasionally from behind a thick wooden table, before ducking back when any of the bouncing balls of death came to close.
Link swung his sword, knocking one of the projectiles back, and bashed with his shield at the same time, knocking over one of the robotic troops that was relentlessly marching towards him. However, he then had to block with his shield, when the projectile he knocked away was vacuumed up by the strange hat his foe was wearing, and shot back at him at twice the speed. 'Where the hell is Bowser?!'
Through all the chaos, the strange green man he was fighting just kept screaming. "I HAVE FURY!"
*WHAM WHAM WHAM* Mario frantically smacked around with his hammer, bashing all around him to keep the disgusting tentacles at bay. They kept creeping in from all sides, wriggling and grasping. Pausing just long enough to pull out a Fire Flower, Mario quickly dowsed the tendrils in flames, sweeping it back and forth as he leapt up into the branches of a nearby tree to catch his breath.
"Mama mia. This is nothing like Ganondorf."
In the middle of the clearing he had just vacated, a thin masked figure stood laughing, while tendrils of darkness stretched out around it, glowing yellow eyes burning behind a purple mask. "What's the matter? Don't you want to play with me? HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Ganondorf raised his glass and tapped it against Bowser's large mug. The two of them were seated in one of Bowser's larger flying machines, a crystal ball linked to some scrying spells Ganondorf had tied together projecting on the table in front of them, showing both of their 'heroes' fighting for their lives, or at least, their sanity.
"A toast, to turning tables." Ganondorf stated, grinning, before taking a long sip.
"Yah yah." Bowser took a long swig of his own. "Serves 'em right, thinking they can just swap with no notice. Joke's on them..."
Ganondorf nodded, grinning.
25.1 (cont.)
Princess Zelda had to admit, three centuries passed faster than she thought it would, it seemed as if it was just yesterday that she'd Awoke. She had a little time, so she chose to reflect on the choices she'd made.
To start off, she'd found the Sheikah line around the hundred year mark, and at around that time Ganondorf had been born to the Gerudo line, the first male in a century just like back home. His subsequent death and rebirth a century later confirmed that loopers could be born and Awaken multiple time in the same loop.
Sadly the Hylian line had dovetailed completely into the Skyloft line a few years back, the Hylians were fragile, yet they were too useful to leave off the battlefield, that coupled with an extremely low birth rate had lead to Zelda marrying off the last Hylian into the Skyloft line in a desperate attempt to have them present in the final battle in spirit if nothing else.
The result was a baby boy of the "Trickshot" class with a unique trait called "Divine Mercy," a trait that allowed him to access all of his class talents at the same time, even though most were meant to be mutually exclusive.
That boy also happened to be an Awake Link, who'd hit his prime just before the final battle.
In fact both Impa (a Boomslinger) and Ganondorf (a Boomstriker) were also similarly Awake and in ideal condition for the final battle.
That plus Minda and Navi (a Shadowjack and Enforcer respectively) showing up at the last minute had tipped things in her favor immeasurably.
Honestly, things couldn't have turned out better if she'd planned this whole thing out.
"You've done pretty well here Princess," Hunter said, "though the outer lands have high levels of corruption, none of our lands have fallen."
"And considering that we have five fully trained heroes with artifact weapons, we should be ready." Cabe added.
"Then let's lure the Cadence here and finish this loop!" Zelda ordered as she let her mind drift to the battlefield one last time.
The five champions were a sight to behold.
First was Ganondorf wielding the caber known as "Tyrant's Wrath," it was covered in menacing spikes and whatever it hit would be subject to a localized explosion.
Minda's caber was different, dubbed the "Hour of Twilight," it had a somewhat ethereal look to it, and enemies hit by it seemed to shift into another dimension, one where they could neither cause harm to nor be harmed by anyone but Minda. They'd also take more damage from her attacks in that state, but being attacked brought them back to reality.
Navi was in a human form this time, and had an oversized crossbow called the "Deku Greatbow" it had a long delay between firings, but the arrows were massive; anything in one's flightpath died instantly.
Link's weapon was a crossbow called "Loftwing's Fury," decorated in feathers and having a beak shaped bow, anything hit by its arrows was sent flying backwards until it hit something of greater mass, this ensured that the enemy would be stunned for quite a while, typically long enough for Navi to have reloaded.
Impa's weapon was a flask-thrower/shield called "Protector's Vigil," where normally allies caught in the blast radius of an alchemist's flask would be hurt as if caught by a grenade, Impa's thrower was an exception; allies caught in her blasts would instead be healed and rendered invisible to foes, while the Cadence's pawns would still be blown to bits.
It was five powerful loopers and their overpowered weapons against an endless swarm of the Cadence's most powerful pawns.
To be honest, Zelda thought that the giant talking chalice preparing to wipe out the Cadence with a supercharged spell was overkill.
Then said chalice summoned every hero she'd commanded over the last three hundred years, and a few loopers she hadn't.
"Where did they come from?" Zelda asked.
"Every hero to ever die here has had their ashes poured into The Chalice," Hunter said, "even loopers."
"That means we can summon 'Shades' of past heroes," Cabe explained, "think of them as weaker versions of the real things."
"A normal Shade will retain all the power they had in life," Hunter informed Zelda, "but loopers take their power with them when they leave, so their Shade is no stronger than the average one."
"Still summoning an army on demand is pretty useful." Cabe commented. "But enough talk, it's time to crush the Cadence!"
It had been a slaughter, none of the pawns could touch the chalice. Still, the battle had been a sight to behold, there were quite literally mountains of dead Cadence at the end of it.
"Well Princess it's been fun," Cabe said, "I'll be blunt: You. Kick. Ass."
"Indeed, it has been an enjoyable few centuries," Hunter said, "but now we must part. Do take care of yourself, won't you?"
"This has been fun," Zelda said, "exhausting, but fun. We should do this again sometime, but now I need a nap."
25.9 (cont.)
"We are back and it would seem there is a new pet available at the animal shelter for adoption. It is being called a drucco. It has three heads, scales, and wings that should not allow it to fly, but it is indeed able to fly. And it is adorable. Its little poisonous fangs and the little puffs of flames it sometimes burps up are so charming. If I did not already have Khoshekh, I might adopt one myself. Sadly, I do not earn enough to support a second pet."
"On an unrelated note, to the family of Intern Francis, you have our condolences. He was a fine intern that died bravely corralling the drucco out of the station."
"Anyways, I would like to once again thank Malon for coming on and doing this interview. And stay tuned next for this interview played back in reverse at double speed. Good night, Night Vale. Good night."
25.1 - Zelda loves the chance to use her matchmaking prowess in new ways with the Massive Chalice.
25.2 - The Human Side of the portal was a much bumpier ride than Link was expecting.
25.3 - Politeness goes farther than violence.
25.4 - Job Dissatisfaction
25.5 - Of course she's mistrusting, she's a ninja!
25.6 - Issei's dragon hoard is not quite safe for work.
25.7 - Chain Chomp will eat your humble pie, even as it is delivering it to you.
25.8 - Unsilenced protagonists.
25.9 - Just another day in Night Vale.
25.10 - Yuelia's life is truly Navi's fantasy.
25.11 - The bait and switch got baited and swapped.