Ok, so I'm so sorry for the super long wait. Eek over a week. You must all hate me. Anyway my week was very busy, so I didn't get to start writing until the other day.

Thanks again, so much to the fabulous XEdwardsLilCullenX she is the best beta in the whole word. I'm eternally grateful to her loyalty.

Reviews would be absolutely terrific. Enjoy!

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age. - Jeanne Moreua

Friday 14th January 2005 - 3:00am

Dear Diary,

I think I'm going insane. These dreams, they're getting even clearer, even more vivid. I thought perhaps that this would have been the end to them. I actually went to bed last night, almost, well, happy. Yes, I think happy is the word for it.

This dream was so different, yet exactly the same, as the others. I can't really explain how. It just, well, really…was. Maybe one of the stranger things was that it had nothing to do with me.

It was actually about David. Well, not just David, but Suzie, Melanie, and even Edward Cullen too. But mainly David. Definitely mainly David.

It started as a memory. At least I think it was a memory. I had never remembered it, until tonight. This makes me think, all the more, that it was part of my imagination. It wouldn't have been the first time this week, after all.

He was about six, maybe seven. He and Melanie were up on Pirates Peak . It must have been the early days of their friendship, as he was ultimate shy and reclusive. They were sitting, just sitting and talking, but I couldn't hear the conversation. It was muffled, like when someone tries to speak in water. It was like I didn't want to hear the conversation. Or, something was stopping me from hearing the conversation.

But the body language told enough. I could see them edging nearer and nearer towards each other. Melanie sat fiddling with her hair. I'd never seen her act so feminine and flirtatious before. This makes me think, more that it was a dream. Though, part of me thinks that maybe this was a part of Melanie that I never got to see.

David sat twiddling with his thumbs. That was odd too. David was shy; he always had been, but never, never around Melanie. Like his Mom had always said, she brought out the best in him.

It seemed like this would carry on forever but then at one point, they were so close their noses were actually touching. Melanie blushed and turned away. And David had leaned away from the close proximity. But then something changed in both their minds. As then their lips were pressed together.

The image wasn't quite right. I distinctly remember their first kiss, at least two years after this event. It had been the last day of fourth grade, David was to go away to Soccer camp - his dad had never really comprehended that David was no jock - , for the whole summer. And he and Melanie had been hugging each other at the school gates. Then, Melanie had shifted onto her tip toes and they had kissed, in front of the entire school playground.

Although now that I think of it, they had both been extremely confident, especially being only fourth graders. It could have been possible they had kissed for much longer than that. No, that's silly. Melanie would have told me. And if this was a memory, it wasn't like it had any connection to the accident, so how come I didn't remember this before?

No, the odds were too high against it for this to be real.

The dream changed after that scene, but it was extremely similar. As were many that followed. Little clips. Memories - perhaps. Though they didn't seem to be mine. All of Melanie and David's. It was like their lives were flashing before my eyes. You could tell in each one that they were slowly changing, growing older. Yet, every one of them had these blocked conversations like the first. Some had kissing, some didn't. But in each one, you couldn't deny the love that was growing between them.

Whether they were memories or not, this was certainly true. I never really paid much attention to it. Not really. Just the attention that any friend would. I mean, I had always known that they had loved each other. But seeing it in front of me like that showed me how truly strong their bond was. Possibly stronger than mine and Mellie's was.

Could it be possible that two seven years old could have been in love, not just love each other, but to actually be in love with each other?

Sometimes, Suzie and I or other people would appear in these clips, but we never stayed for long. And the way we were shown made it seem that we were insignificant. What really mattered were the two children, each time falling more and more in love with each other.

I could have stayed and watched these images all night. They made me peaceful, serene even. It gave me more of that jolted feeling than any romantic comedy ever could. It was real.

But it couldn't stay that way of course. This is me, isn't it? I possibly, have the worst luck in the world. So why should I be happy?

It was that day, of course. Yes, of course it was. Only, this time the perspective was entirely different. As if from an on looker. Though the words were still muffled to me. I could see myself, shouting at her and her shouting back. I'd never really paid much attention to David's face before. Despite how many times I'd had this dream. Now, I did. And it was like; somehow, this whole dream had to be based on David.

He was scared. No. More than scared. He was petrified. Mortified. Terrified.

Whatever you want to call it. He looked more scared than I had ever imagined. It even horrified me just to watch him.

Then I saw myself, throwing the rocks, again and again. Even now it made me cringe.

How could I have been like that?

I thought, perhaps, it would have kept on playing. That maybe, this was the time I would remember. But of course, I'm the girl with no luck. Though, perhaps it's for the best. I'm just as scared as I am intrigued by my memories.

It changed then and so did the perspective. It wasn't an on looker anymore, but I was seeing through David's eyes.

He was leaning over Melanie's cold, lifeless body, he was crying, shouting with pain. I couldn't see myself or Suzie, but I knew exactly where David was.

The sound was muted, like it had been the whole way through, but just for one brief second it was as if it had been lifted. And I could hear David's words.

"Don't leave me. I love you."

And then he bent down to move his lips against her cold and lifeless ones, for just a brief moment. I haven't ever remembered this before.

The images continued to flicker, one by one. All muted, like before. Though, these were quicker. They were also more painful and the warmth I had felt had gone with these new images. Every one of them included David, though very few I can actually remember from my real memory.

Some were everyday, him eating his breakfast, him playing his guitar, him doing his homework. Though some were most definitely not. One, quicker than possibly all the rest, lasted merely a second. It was late at night and David was in the cemetery. Of course, that cemetery. He was lying asleep, his arms wrapped around Melanie's grave. Of anything, I think that was one of my more disturbing memories.

Another, I saw him on the beach with his family. He had walked further up than his parents and was drawing in the sand. I don't think he even knew what he was drawing and neither did I at first. But then I saw it clear as day. It was Melanie. He sat there and cried, rocking himself back and forth, staring at it. A little boy then ran over it, without even noticing. David ran after him, slamming him into the ground and pinning his arms back. He didn't let go until the boy's father pulled him off.

All indicated one thing. David missed her, missed her more than anything.

The most vivid of images would have to be the one of the very last. David was the age he is now. Obviously by the stubble starting to form on his chin and the length of his lankier legs. He and Suzie were talking. No, not talking. Arguing. Maybe. I'm not sure. I could only judge by their lips. Suzie seemed to be talking, acting calmly.

Though David could not.

He slammed his fist into Suzie's stomach, leaving her winded on her couch. Then ran back to his house. I saw him take the first box of pills that he could from the cupboard and ran to the bathroom. He raked in his Mom's makeup bag to find some dark red lipstick.

He started to write on the big mirror above the sink. He started to write my name.

Bella I…

But he stopped. Something had changed his mind. He threw the box of pills into the garbage and rubbed off the lipstick with a wet towel.

The image had me all shook up. Had he actually tried to commit suicide? And, what exactly was he trying to tell me? All these questions rolled through my head.

And just as I thought, all my questions were to be answered. The scenery changed once more, for the last time. It was back at Pirates Peak . David and Melanie were sitting together yet again. Only, this time it was different. They weren't scrawny seven year olds. They were practically adults. Teenagers maybe.

Melanie was hardly recognizable; she had become prettier over the years, growing into her large features. David was more so recognizable, but still there were many differences. It was weird, I knew the seventeen year old David, but he was much different to this David. This David's skin was a lovely golden glow, evenly tanned. His hair, still floppy and boy like, was shorter, more styled. And most importantly his sparkling blue eyes glistened with happiness.

I only saw this image for a brief amount of seconds, but it stuck in my head all the same. And then I wasn't an onlooker so much, but a participant. I wasn't seeing through David's eyes though, but through Melanie's.

He was leaning in to kiss her. To kiss me. This shocked me slightly. I started to pull back. He was kissing Melanie, but he was also kissing me, I was seeing through her eyes.

It was only when I started to pull back, did the features in David's face start to change. His skin turned a luminous ivory, his eyes a fluorescent gold, his hair a soft bronze. It was Edward leaning in to kiss me. Not David. I didn't pull back, the shock and even joy of it, had me paralyzed. He got so close.

But of course I had to wake up.

I'm not sure what to think diary. My head feels like it's about to explode. I can't comprehend what this is all supposed to mean.

I'm confused.

Yours,

Bella

Chapters 26 & 27 should be up asap. They've both been written, just waiting to be beta-ered. And knowing XEdwardsLilCullenX's super speed & efficiency that shouldn't be too long, either. Starting chapter 28, tonight as well, so that should be up pretty soon as well. Reviews would be fantastic. Thanks!