Sorry to keep you guys waiting! I had dodgy internet the whole of last week and then I went camping and had to go cold turkey (no internet) for three days, which was a whole battle on its own. But I'm back.

"And which way did the kids go?" Officer Payne asked Dr. Gunther-Hagen, noting down all the details of the unusual hallway explosion. The vice principal had vehemently insisted that the six children who had been in detention at the time in question had somehow been responsible for such extensive damage –flooding the hallways and blowing up the entire corridor.

Officer Payne knelt down and inhaled deeply. Ammonium nitrate. He smiled. Those kids were smarter than the usual bunches of vandals, if this was indeed their doing.

"They must've run out of the front door and made a break for it," Dr. Gunther-Hagen said, running a hand through his thinning hair. "Didn't want to get caught and jailed, probably."

Payne stood up and brushed the dust off of his hands. "You realize that I'll have to hold you and Mr. Batchelder in our custody until we can find those kids."

The vice principal blinked. "What?"

The officer shrugged. "Just a safety precaution."

For a moment it looked like Dr. Gunther-Hagen was resisting the impulse to yell something violent, but then he shrugged. "We'd better find those poor kids immediately, then. You know. For their safety."

…

Jason blew smoke out of his nose and giggled like a five-year-old girl, tickled at the sight. "Lookie here at me… I'm magical!"

Celeste snorted heavily. "You're not magical, dumbass…" Her once-immaculately combed hair was now hanging around her shoulders in a messy, ratty bunch. She caught sight of herself in a mirror hanging on the wall and smirked. "Man, I look like I just hitchhiked across the ghetto."

"You couldn't last a day in the ghetto," Nick remarked from where he was lounging, his head in Max's lap. "You couldn't last five minutes in the ghetto."

"I look like someone decided to take a shit on my head," Celeste said airily. "If only my mother could see me now…"

"Your shoulder okay?" Max asked Nick quietly.

"It feels like someone poured hot lead onto my arm," Nick muttered. "But don't worry about me –I can handle a little pain."

"We're going to get you to a hospital. At some point," Max promised.

"You usually look so perfect," Jason said, trying his best to uncross his eyes. "Like… like… a Barbie or something. Why d'you always have to look so perfect?"

Celeste yawned loudly. "Why do you always have to ask dumb questions?"

"Why do you always have to be so rude?"

"Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too…" Monique sang offkey from the corner, where she and James were so intertwined on the same armchair that it was impossible to tell whose legs were whose.

"This isn't Oprah," Celeste snapped at Jason. "We're in a really bad situation, and we're h –h –high. Also, this room is so gross. Does your grandpa ever clean the dust off of his junk?"

"I like you when you talk dirty –I mean, about dirty things," Jason mumbled, his head resting in the crook of his arm. "I think I gotta throw up."

"Can't hold your weed, can you, Magic?" Max crooned.

Celeste shoved her hair out of her eyes. "I have an autistic sister."

Nick, Max, and Jason stared at her. Even Monique pulled herself away from James for a moment to regard Celeste with renewed interest.

"What?" Jason asked quietly, twiddling his ears as though he hadn't heard properly."

"You asked me why I always had to be so perfect." Celeste said defiantly.

"Younger or older?" Nick asked after a long pause. As if it mattered.

"Older. She's been that way since before I was born. And sometimes I think my mom uses me as… like, a tool. Like, a way to channel my sister's being into me. She wants me to be extra-perfect and extra-popular and extra-smart and the whole shebang to make up for the fact that my sister just can't. And I want to be perfect. I really do. But…" Celeste expelled another cloud of smoke from her mouth. "Y'know, it's hard to be completely perfect. You can't be perfect and be happy. I haven't been happy since the moment I was born."

"Tough," Jason said, bobbing his head up and down.

"Shut up, Magic," Celeste said, throwing her shoe at him. "I'm sure you're completely normal."

"LOL," Jason said, smirking. "Right. Normal. Normal…" He looked at the others, the others who had somehow become his closest confidants within the span of the past few hours. "You know how you say a word over and over until it doesn't even sound like a word anymore; it just sounds like some mad cow disease or something?"

Max hiccupped and everyone else nodded in assent.

"Well… that's how every day of my life feels like. It's always like, 'Get A's, Jason,', or 'Get scholarships, Jason,', or 'Study day and night, Jason,'. It sucks. I've been doing the same thing for so much of my life that it doesn't even feel like I'm living anymore."

"Do you like… I mean, are you…" Celeste trailed off, staring awkwardly at her hands.

"Suicidal? I don't think so... I mean, I get where they're coming from. My dad's a mailman and my mom works at Kroger. They just want the best for me, and they don't want me to end up like them… but I can see how happy they are with each other and their lives while I'm so miserable and I just can't help thinking… is it such a bad thing to end up like that?"

"Not if you're happy," James intoned from the corner.

"Since when did this become a crap version of Oprah?" Celeste demanded.

"Since we all got locked in a room together." James said, grinning.

"Gus, shhhh!" Nick said dramatically, putting a finger to his lips and sitting up. "I hear police sirens outside. Man… we're fucked." And he began to giggle hysterically, something no one had ever seen Nick Walker do before. Something that he would have killed people for seeing if he had been normal and not high in the sky on enough weed to knock out a horse.

They all fell silent, and sure enough, by craning their ears, they could just barely hear the sound of the front door to Alfie's Warlock and Magic Emporium… or something like that, anyway.

"It's the fuzz!" said Jason to no one in particular.

"What if they hear us breathing?" Monique asked worriedly. "They'll find us! We should hold our breath!"

"We can't hold our breath for that long, you dumbass," Celeste snapped.

"Speak for yourself," Monique huffed. "I used to be on the swim team until freshman year. Fastest two-hundred meter butterfly in the Little Sharks League."

"So that's how you got such a hot body, babe…" James muttered.

"You know who else has a hot body?" Nick mumbled, setting his head back in Max's lap. "Erm… whose lap is this?"

"Mine," Max whispered loudly, concealing a wide smile. "I think."

"'Kay, good."

"So, who else has a hot body?"

"Helen Mirren?"

Max giggled and stroked Nick's hair. "So you're into older ladies?"

"Maybe… when's your birthday?"

"I'll be seventeen in June."

Nick grinned. "You're four months older than me. So I am into older ladies."

"You know, if we kissed right now, it'd only be our second kiss ever." Max whispered as Nick sat up and stared into her eyes.

"Your eyes are fucking gorgeous," Nick whispered, and he pressed his lips to hers for the second time. And the third time. And about ten more times… until Celeste literally walked over and pulled them apart.

"Guys… this is not the time to be consummating your five-hour-old relationship," Celeste began, but she was cut off by a shrill giggle. She looked up to see James leading Monique into the back closet, both of them giggling madly. "No, seriously… stop having sex!" she shouted to the closed closet door.

"We're not… we're just making out, honest…" Monique's voice filtered through the closed door.

Celeste gave up and flopped down onto the ground. She smirked when she noticed Jason eyeing her. "I don't mean to be the designated driver… I guess it's just my nature. Guess you'll have to put up with it."

"I was thinking," Jason began.

"What, that we're gonna get arrested and go to juvie. I was thinking the same thing. Hopefully they'll have chocolate there."

In the dark of the room, Celeste could faintly make out Jason's cheeks, which were tinged red. "No… I was thinking about what happened in the girls' locker room."

Celeste threw her other shoe at him. "Perv."

"I'd never dump you," Jason began.

Celeste eyed him. "You high?"

"Yeah, but –"

"Then this doesn't mean shit. But since I'm high too, I'll let you continue." Celeste said.

"Right, so I might not be some sort of hunky football jock that everyone either wants to date or be. I don't spend my Saturday nights going out to parties and getting drunk –I spend them either studying Advanced Calculus or else playing League of Legends with my online friends. We're from two different worlds –but there's no denying that there's something between us. I know you've had a horrible relationship in the past, but I'd never dump you. I'd never leave you. I'd never cheat on you –and you don't ever have to worry about that, because who else could I ever find that was even close to your league?" Jason asked, grinning.

Celeste smiled. "Get to the point, Doctor Who."

Jason went extremely red. "Uh… everyone else is… so do you wanna?"

"Do I wanna what?"

"I dunno… make out, I guess?"

Celeste sighed. "And you were off to such a good start…" She fiddled with her fingers. "I'm sorry, Jason, but I can't."

He nodded, shoulders slumped. "Okay. I get it, I mean, you don't want to be involved romantically with someone like me, and that's okay –"

"No, that's not why I can't," Celeste interrupted. "It has nothing to do with you. You're incredibly sweet, and cute, and you have a surprising set of washboard abs –"

"From playing table tennis."

"I didn't need to know that. But the point is, I can't be with you because I'm just not into you. But it's not just you. I'm not into… well, I'm not into guys… in general…"

Jason frowned. "Huh?"

"In a way, I was relieved that Ari cheated on me. Because…" Celeste turned red herself. "I'm hella gay."*

Jason's mouth fell all the way to the floor. "You like girls? That's like, every man's porn fantasy come to life! I mean… that's a shame. No, wait, that's not what I mean, but you know what I mean –"

"I do. Yeah." Celeste said.

The two of them lapsed into awkward silence, punctuated occasionally by the odd thump against the closet door. Nick and Max were resting, her head on his shoulder and his arms around hers. It was adorable, even if the other couple in the room was being totally disgusting.

Everything that could have been said was said. So, in a way, it came as a relief to the six of them when the inevitable knock came on the back room door.

"Open up, it's the police. Put your hands up and step outside. We don't want any trouble."

*I didn't really want to put Jason and Celeste together, since they're supposed to be siblings in canon, and I'm not really down with incest. So that's my way of avoiding that whole puddle of cringe-worthy substance.

The end is in sight... I only have thirty chapters and maybe an epilogue that I'm toying with. Not sure about that just yet. So, since we're in the homestretch, if anyone has any weird questions to ask me, whether it's about the story or not, fire away! I'll do my best to answer them without giving too much away.

Also, check out my new MR story, You Again. It's super short and I'm already done writing it, so there won't be any long waits for updates. I really have no life. Especially because it's summer vacation. Aaah...