Harvey Goes Home.
Jim and Harvey's working day was done. Finally. It had felt like a long, long day.
Jim gave a hefty sigh of relief - he was ready for respite. Pity Oswald had said he would probably be back late tonight. He had been looking forward to a Cobblepot cuddle when he got home.
Still, the amorous texts his creative little criminal had sent along with his advanced abject apologies would help keep him going for a while - especially that last one! His little kingpin could be so...well, saucy when he put his mind to it...he would most definitely be filing away that message for a rainy day! And it bode well for what might be in store for him later, depending on how tired - or how frisky - his little Ozzy turned out to be.
If he was exhausted and unable to perform the particular trick he'd promised in his text - well, that would keep, of course, but the least his dapper little dandy could expect was a good therapeutic massage - shoulders, legs, maybe even a full-body, if Jim could stretch to it.
It was therapy for Jim too. Touching and manipulating Oswald's bare body did wonders for his own state of mind. He loved the sensation of his smooth alabaster skin, its pliability beneath his fingers….He delighted in feeling the knots and tensions beneath the flesh physically melting away as he worked.
He also loved the aromatic scent of the essential oils as they warmed up through the gentle friction between his fiance's skin and his own hands. The oils he mostly used were sandalwood and cedarwood which were Oswald's favourites. They smelt warm and woody. But when Oswald was feeling particularly stressed out he changed the blend to a more relaxing combination like camomile and lavender.
The fragrant, soothing smell and Oswald's sighs of appreciation and/or groans of pleasure always added to the enjoyment of the experience.
And….if they were both feeling up to it, the process might serve as an overture to even greater things….
That new super-king-size antique tester-style bed had already seen some pretty vigorous action….the top-of-the-range sprung mattress had been tested to the max! And it had passed with flying colours.
Then again there were very few items of furniture, both soft and hard, that hadn't been 'broken in' by the amorous pair at some time or another. Jim couldn't look at the sheepskin rug in front of the fireplace without picturing his gorgeous little guy lying on his side, his head resting on his propped-up arm, greeting Jim wearing nothing but his wide blue 'come hither' stare. That had been a very pleasant surprise when he'd arrived home late one evening….to put it mildly!
But if they were too tired to show love in the time-honoured fashion, a good rub down would still aid sleep - sweet sleep, in each other's arms. There could be much worse things than holding one another as they fell asleep, then waking together feeling refreshed after a night not fraught and interrupted with anxious or disturbing dreams.
There were still plenty of those occasions too. Then they would need each other's affection and kindness more than ever, and they always gave and received it in abundance.
Meanwhile, Jim would rattle around in that huge penthouse that he and Oswald had just moved into. It seemed that the swish condo by the docks had still not been quite good enough for his fussy little fiance - not private enough or grand enough for the King of Gotham and his future husband.
They could always work on filling up the space. They'd not discussed the possibility of having children. They weren't even married yet, but Jim would love to think that their future might include a family.
Oswald had insisted on taking charge and doing all the planning for their wedding, but he'd not shared any details of them with Jim yet - not even the date. Jim would surely need to know that, in case he had to make preparations - such as, maybe, going on a diet!
Since getting together with Oswald he had never eaten so well, but he was sure his waistline was expanding. His pants felt more than a little tight!
Jim tried not to feel too restlessly eager, and he understood that Oswald had been working long hours - but he was starting to suspect that their marriage plans had been put on the back-burner. It was hard not to feel impatient.
But at least they had a beautiful home to share.
It was a fabulous place and he was proud of it, but the enormity of it also magnified his feelings of loneliness when Oswald wasn't around. It was just too damn big, quiet and empty up there when his lively, sparky little devil was absent. He looked forward to Oswald's bright, cheerful voice calling, "Jim dear, I'm home!" Or even his less-good-humoured rants about something and/or someone who had ticked him off that day….which he always made an effort to keep to a minimum for Jim's sake, and to try to keep to the rules they had set themselves about not bringing their work home at the end of the day.
But whatever mood his little Cobblepot happened to be in - and whatever version of him came in through that entrance hall and into the living room - Jim was always delighted to see him, if only to know that he was still alive.
He would find something to occupy himself until Oswald arrived home - after checking on dinner, which Olga would have left for them to self-serve from the slow-cooker.
Oswald had taken Olga back after her abject apology for deserting him and her heartfelt plea for him to allow her the privilege of serving him again.
"You always gave me warm feeling here," she had grovelled, pouting emphatically and touching her chest with her chubby, oversized fingers. "Mr Nygma, he was bad man, I never liked him, you know - I knew you could do better! And I know he hurt you - nasty man! I had to run away….he FRIGHTENED me…."
"Of course!" Oswald had looked open-mouthed and scandalised and had made appropriately sympathetic noises. "Olga, I completely understand. Think no more about it."
"Oh, thank you so much, Mr Cobblepot! I like that new one, though. That detective man. He's GOOD man. Much better for you."
"Thank you, Olga!" Oswald had said with genuine warmth. "Detective Gordon and I - we're getting married, y'know," he'd added confidentially, with a coy smile.
"Ah, good. So he bought you nice ring too?" She had lowered her mascara-laden lashes and pursed up her scarlet lips lasciviously as she had spied the sparkling sapphire stone on Oswald's finger.
Oswald's smile had relaxed - just a little.
"Yes - yes he did, Olga. It is a lovely piece of jewellery, isn't it?"
He had instinctively put his other hand over his finger, covering the bright blue stone protectively.
"Anyway, Olga - how do you feel about coming to work for me again? After all - we are old friends, right?" He leaned forward and raised his eyebrow meaningfully. "Subject to six months probation, of course."
Jim thought hard about what to do with his own company. He could play some music, have a whisky or two - or a glass or two of wine - take a long soak in the tub, maybe even play chess by himself at the little table set up by the window in the corner. He might even win…..
Or maybe, just go out on the terrace and stare out at the view….and think….and listen out for signs of life…
Sometimes, you could have too much peace and tranquility.
Then something suddenly occurred to him….
Yeah, it was about time. He had left off doing this for long enough.
"Well, see ya tomorrow, Jimbo," Harvey was saying, as he straightened his hat, stretched himself with a groan of relief and prepared to leave. "Have a good evening - erm, what am I saying? Of course you'll have a good one!" He winked mischievously.
"Yeah, yeah, OK, I get it," Jim arched his eyebrows and bared his teeth good humouredly. He scratched behind his ear distractedly and glanced away for a moment.
Harvey wrinkled up his nose and shrugged. "Sorry, couldn't resist!"
"I know. It's ok - anyway you're right, so how can I argue with it? Anyway - Harv - before you go, do you have any plans this evening?"
"Well, let's just check my calendar - hmmm, nope! I don't think the Duchess of Devon-shire requires my company tonight, as it happens! I think her card is full. Ha!" Harvey gave a heavy sigh.
Jim grinned sympathetically. "Poor Harv! Well, do you fancy keeping me company?"
"What, is lover b - erm, Oswald not going to be at home waiting for you?"
"Nah, he texted me to say he'll be back late tonight." Jim couldn't stop his own heavy sigh from following.
"Ah. That's a shame." Harvey cleared his throat and left an awkward silence waiting to be filled.
"Well, he's busy - got important meetings, and stuff….you know the way it is..." Jim looked away and scratched behind his ear again.
"Yeah, sure. Well, in any case Jimbo, I'd love to come and look around your fancy new love nest," Harvey said flippantly.
"There's no need to say it like that, Harvey." Jim put his hands on his hips sternly.
"OK, OK, soldier boy - stand down. Point taken. I was out of order. And I'd love to come back and see your new - place of residence!"
"Well, OK. I'm glad you want to come. Erm - I didn't ask before because I wasn't sure if you were - well, interested."
"Of course I am. I wouldn't miss it for the world, Jimbo. I hope I'll have the grand tour, seeing as I'm a longtime friend of the future husband of the King of Gotham….special privileges, and all that…."
"Oh - yeah, that's right, Harv….you're top of the list - of course!"
"Jesus, Jim. The lobby is bigger than my whole apartment ten times over!"
Jim cleared his throat apologetically. "The penthouse is even bigger," he said in a gruff, hushed voice.
"Rub it in, why don't ya?" huffed Harvey. Jim grinned sheepishly.
"Good evening, gentlemen," the desk clerk greeted politely as they walked towards the penthouse elevator.
"Good evening Sam," Jim returned warmly.
Harvey nodded and touched the brim of his hat. "Evening," he said. Then he thought again and removed his hat completely.
They stepped into the private elevator - which Harvey again semi-joked was still much bigger than his own apartment. The doors closed with a whisper and a soft clang and Jim tapped in the access code on the numbered pad on the wall.
The elevator began to climb, carrying them both swiftly towards their destination with a high-pitched whirring sound.
Jim clasped his hands in front of him tightly. He was looking forward to showing Harvey round but he was apprehensive about the way he might react. He knew what he could be like and he knew also that he was still trying to come to terms with his relationship with - and betrothal to - the Penguin.
He was trying though, bless him….
Harvey stood with folded arms and shuffled awkwardly, whistling occasionally to himself, as he waited for the ride to end. The journey took half a minute max as the elevator was fast and powerful, but it felt like a lot longer than that. They stood in silence the whole way.
This entire experience felt more than a little surreal. Harvey never thought that Jim would end up in a place like this - and especially not with someone like Cobblepot! But he didn't say a word, of course - he didn't want to hurt Jim's feelings any more than he had done already.
The elevator doors finally hissed open. They stepped out into the entrance hall - with further smart jokes from Harvey about its dimensions - and then went through into the living-room.
Harvey's breath was suitably taken away by what met his eyes. For a few moments he was speechless, for a change.
"My God, Jim - you could keep a plane in this place!" he exclaimed, once he'd processed all that was in front of him. He stepped forward slowly, looking around him with wonder and amazement.
"Don't think we didn't consider that," joked Jim, patting him on the shoulder affectionately.
Jim had said that they should have had a helipad on the roof - in case of emergencies, or the need for a quick getaway - but Oswald had had a swimming pool installed instead.
"Jim, Jim - you worry too much! We already have a panic room!" Ozzy had protested impatiently. "And don't you like the idea of having a swim? With me? I bought myself some new shorts - they are very, erm, short, if you get my meaning, Jim! And who knows, we might even dispense with our clothes altogether and have a skinny dip!" He had fluttered his long black lashes suggestively.
Jim had felt himself weaken. A lot. He'd swallowed hard and cleared his throat.
"Sounds great, sweetheart. I was just trying to be cautious, that's all…"
"I know, I know - and I appreciate that, dear - but surely we can also have a little fun?" Oswald had peered up at Jim and smiled sweetly, dimpling cherubically.
"OK, OK...you made your point…yeah, of course we can. So, Mr Cobblepot - about those little shorts you were just describing to me. Do I get to see them on you now?"
Harvey marvelled at the sheer opulence of the surroundings.
"Geez, Jim. You really are living how the other half lives in here! I can't think how long I'd have to work to afford something like this. Like, forever, I think!"
"If you're hinting that I'm a kept man Harv, then the answer's no. I pay my way." Jim's tone was defensive again.
"Hey, Jimbo. You know I didn't mean it like that. I'm just being playful - you know me, buddy!" Harvey cocked his head and smiled sheepishly.
"Yeah, yeah, of course I do. Sorry to get so touchy."
"Don't apologise Jim. I was being a bit on the cheeky side, right? Anyway - I love what you've - erm - both - done with the place."
The light, cavernous open-plan space afforded to the couple by having the entire floor - as well as an upper level and a roof terrace and balcony all round - was counterbalanced by Oswald's fancier tastes in ornate, dark antique style furniture and heavy soft furnishings. Most of the living area was given over to the Regency-style tables and throne-style chairs and dark mahogany wood trim that was Oswald's motif. Rich, heavy purple velvet, gold-satin-lined hangings graced the huge floor to ceiling windows. They had been put there to shield the inhabitants from bright sunlight - but now the sun was low, they were tied back - to reveal an amazing view of the skyline.
Fur throws adorned the purple leather sofas and the chaise-longue, and there was an abundance of animal skin rugs strewn around on the polished walnut floor. So Penguin had put his subtle stamp there too. Fur was definitely his kind of thing - wood flooring and leather, not so much. That had Jim written all over it.
"I'm a bit, well, laid-back - as you know - and he's just so fastidious and neat and tidy," Jim remarked to Harvey with a wistful grin. "But we rub along together just fine."
"Opposites attract, right?" said Harvey.
"I know what you're thinking, Harv - but the two different styles kinda work together, don't they? And anyway, I'd be happy to go along with his opinion if he disagreed. He has more idea about interior decoration and fixtures than I do. He has such a good eye for detail, don't ya think? But I was allowed to supervise when it was all delivered and fitted." Jim chuckled, an uncharacteristic blush of pink appearing on his face. "Oswald was - erm, very impressed by the way I kept all the removals guys in line…" He paused, coughed, and looked away for a second.
"Um - anyway, I can put up with a few antique sofas and chairs if he comes with them. They're only things at the end of the day. I could happily live anywhere and with anything as long as...well, as long as we live in it together." Jim swallowed hard and glanced away again.
Harvey heard the whisper of longing in Jim's tone, and watched the expression on his face. A lump came to his throat.
He reflected that here, in his latter day castle, Cobblepot could look out on, and down at, 'his kingdom' with the man he loved - and the man who loved him - by his side. He must be the happiest man in Gotham - perhaps, even, in the world. If not, he should be.
Harvey tried not to feel too jealous of Jim's new lifestyle. After all, Jim had to sleep with Penguin in order to get all this. He would rather sleep on the street than have to do that!
But Jim didn't have to. He had chosen to. And he seemed more than happy to go on doing it - much more than happy!
Harvey was still trying to come to terms with this concept.
He really wanted to understand why Jim had fallen for Penguin - and learn to comprehend what he saw in him.
"Hey, Harv - come and see my den!" Jim announced brightly. "You're gonna love it!"
The part of the upper floor that housed Jim's 'den' was accessed by a spiral staircase at its corner - literally, a modern but retro twist. "Come on Harv - keep up!" Jim teased, as Harvey, panting a little, had to rest halfway up.
Harvey felt more than a little foolish after Jim told him that although Oswald found the stairs a little bit of a challenge, he could manage the climb.
But he further explained that his fiance had promised not to intrude if Jim wanted to be left alone with his thoughts.
"We agreed that time apart can also be good for a relationship!" Jim explained, "That's why I have my own den and office space up here. It's all my own stuff. You can see how it gets!" He gestured towards the heaps of paper, overturned files and randomly-scattered newspapers. "Oz would hate it in here - as I said, he's so particular about things being in order!"
Harvey laughed appreciatively.
"Although, " Jim continued, "To be honest - I don't really spend that all that much time up here at the moment. I only come here when Oswald's not around. We don't seem to have got to the stage of needing space from each other. We're still...well, y'know, pretty much living in each other's pockets, outside of work."
Harvey resisted the urge to make a badly-timed pun about Jim being very much in Oswald's pocket. This penthouse would have cost an absolute fortune. And he couldn't see Jim being able to pay much towards the price, even though he'd said that he did 'pay his way.'
He also hadn't been able to stop himself from making a quip about the size of the place and the number of bedrooms (three) and the number of bathrooms (four).
"My God, Jim. Your apartment used to be a bedroom! Don't you get erm, lost living here? Rattle around a bit? Agoraphobic, maybe? Do you need a map?"
Jim had just laughed.
But Harvey had to conclude that Jim was in a very good place just at the moment - in every sense.
"Well, James - I have to say, you landed on your feet here! I'm impressed!" Harvey gave a nod of begrudging admiration.
"You haven't seen the best yet Harv - come out onto the terrace. There's a great view from the balcony!"
"Sure! Go on, make me feel even more envious!"
"Sorry!"
So out they went.
"Yeah. You're right, Jim. Great view."
"It's beautiful, huh? We often come out here to look out at the city together." Jim suddenly sounded quiet and reflective. He was staring way out into the distance.
Harvey turned and studied the look on Jim's face. It was very telling.
"You really do love him, don't you Jim?"
Jim turned to Harvey and sighed. "Yep," he rasped. "Of course I do!"
"Jim, I hope you don't mind me asking - but - why? What made you fall for Penguin?" Harvey resisted the urge to add, "of all people".
"I can't quite explain it. I think I always did love him. I just had this...feeling about him. There was...well...something about his eyes. But I didn't want to admit it to myself."
"So you accept him for who - and what - he is?"
"I do. And I'll tell you another thing, Harv - he accepts and loves me for who and what I really am - good and bad, light and dark. He always has. And NO-ONE else has ever felt that way about me."
"Well, Jimbo, I think you just went and answered my question."
They went back indoors. Harvey glanced at his watch.
"Harv - I am sorry - I never offered you a drink! You must think I'm a bad host!" Jim rolled his eyes and face-palmed himself.
"No problemo, Jim. You were busy showing me round and...telling me important stuff. I'll take a rain check on the drink. Tell you what, though, Jim - I wouldn't mind using your guest bathroom before I go. It's a bit of a way across town to mine."
"Sure! I'll just show you the way. Argh, I never showed you the guest quarters or the bedrooms either did I? Maybe next time. Oh, by the way, the real estate agent called the guest cloakroom a 'powder room' when he showed us around!" Jim shrugged as if to say, "Go figure!"
"Ha! Very fancy!" Harvey pulled an amused face and Jim reciprocated. " But please, don't bother escorting me, Jim - just give me directions. I'll find my way! I am a detective - right?""
"Hmmm, OK then. Tell you what Harv - just text me if you get lost! I'll come and find you!"
"Ha ha, Detective Gordon!"
"You think I'm joking?!"
The 'powder room' was located just off the foyer inside the entrance hall.
For all his boasting that he didn't need hand holding, Harvey managed to take a wrong turn and ended up on the wrong side of the penthouse.
Instead of turning right towards the foyer, he turned left, went past the dining room and ended up going through into the master bedroom.
The sight of the huge room with its colossal super king sized antique tester bed told him that he wasn't, in fact, in the 'powder room'.
He knew he should get straight out of there. He was intruding - these were their private quarters. But he couldn't help having a morbid fascination now he was there.
His eyes took in the rich satin purple bedcover. Oswald's signature shade. There were cream satin sheets underneath and there was a cream embroidered runner at the foot. The pillow covers were ivory silk with purple edging.
The carved wood walk-in closets were made from antique mahogany. Again, Oswald's touch.
There were prints of modern cityscapes of Gotham on the wall, and an oil painting of the Van Dahl mansion. But he noticed one hanging that seemed very out of place. He walked over to it and peered closer.
It was a small framed print of two rainbow coloured penguins. There was a slogan around them which said: 'Every love story is beautiful but ours is my favourite'.
He couldn't imagine either of them choosing that - but one, or both of them must have! And they both thought it important enough to display near to their bed.
Then he spied the photo on the right hand bedside table. He couldn't help being compelled to go over and check it out.
He went over to it and picked it up.
It was a 'selfie' of the couple taken at the beach. Harvey didn't recognise Oswald immediately because he was wearing a long sleeved t shirt, Ray Bans, and, of all things, a baseball cap. Hardly his usual style.
He could tell that Jim had his free arm - the one not taking the photo - around Oswald's shoulder.
They were both smiling, and looked relaxed, happy - and very in love.
Harvey replaced the photo carefully and stepped away. Now he really did feel like an invader.
He hurried out, closing the door carefully behind him - not before noticing the 'his 'n' his' robes hanging on the coat hooks on the back of the door. One was made of cotton and the other of heavy embroidered silk.
"Jim - Jim, dear! I'm home!" Oswald limped eagerly into the living room.
"I hope you're ready for this - I'm back early and I'm feeling frisky!"
Harvey found his way back to the hall and went to go into the living room. Then he stopped dead as he saw Cobblepot's coat hanging on the coat rack and his cane stood in the umbrella stand.
He couldn't face them, somehow.
He turned back and walked away towards the elevator, texting a polite excuse to Jim as he went.