Chapter 25

Seven weeks later, Jack found himself following Ed Felder, his attorney, into a conference room on his old floor. He tugged at the collar of his shirt, grateful to be wearing his own clothes and not prison garb. The US Attorney's office had contacted Ed and set up this meeting just two days prior. The trial was set to begin next week, and for the life of him, he couldn't understand why they wanted a meeting now. The gentle whirl of Ed's wheelchair stopped and Jack realized they had arrived. He looked up and saw the two prosecuting attorneys seated at the table, a stenographer tucked into the corner…and Martin, his arm around Samantha's shoulder, seated on the couch behind the attorneys. The two FBI police who had escorted them took their stations just outside the door.

Martin watched his former boss as he came into the conference room with a cool eye. There was just a little left of the powerful man who had taught him so much about finding missing people. His cheeks were hollow and his shoulders stooped. It seemed to Martin that Jack had lost several pounds in the past seven weeks.

Alexa Tafoya stood and shook Ed Felder's hand, "Thank you for coming this afternoon. Please note all parties present and accounted for," she directed the last to the stenographer who had her fingers poised over her special keyboard.

"Anything we can do for the US Attorney's Office," Ed replied, tugging Jack into the seat next to the open space left for his wheelchair. "Although I am surprised to be called to a meeting this close to the trial date."

"No more than I was to ask for the meeting," Alexa responded honestly.

Ed frowned, "I don't get it. Who called for the meeting then?"

"I did," Samantha said quietly. "I need some answers so I can sleep at night. Answers only your client can answer." She refused to even look in Jack's direction. She kept her entire focus on the mildly amused face of his attorney. Lisa's directed dreaming only worked for so long. Samantha found herself able to maintain the direction as long as it took to fall asleep, but once she was asleep, her subconscious didn't want to take any direction other than its own.

"And if he chooses to answer Ms. Spade's questions?" Ed directed his question to the attorney, but kept his gaze on the object of his client's obsession. He could see she wasn't lying when she said she couldn't sleep; the dark circles under her eyes were prominent despite her attempts to use make-up and the bruise on her left cheek had faded to an ugly green and yellow. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail, but it hung limply and was dull in color. To make matters worse, he could see the brace still on her left wrist peeking from her jacket sleeve and her black suit hung on her frame, emphasizing the quantity of weight she had lost. He really hoped there was a good deal about to be put on the table because if Samantha Spade took the stand in her current condition, any jury in the world would throw the book at Jack.

Alexa moved a piece of paper, stalling for time as she took in Ed Felder's scrutiny of Samantha. "Well, if Mr. Malone chooses to answer the questions and accept the following terms, he'll serve his sentence in the Federal Correctional Institution Pekin, in Illinois."

Ed swung his gaze to the younger attorney, "What terms?"

Meagan opened a folder, "Mr. Malone will agree to serve the minimums for each count consecutively. That's 5 years for the aggravated sexual assault and 2 more for the stalking. And no parole, with sentences to begin immediately following Judge Lowder's approval."

"Wait a minute," Felder pulled open his own folder. "The stalking is a Class D, non-violent felony. Jack has no prior record; he shouldn't have to serve any time on that."

"Alternatively," Tafoya interjected, "we could go to trial next week and push for the maximums. That's twenty-five years alone for the sexual assault." She looked to the man who had put this entire chain of events into motion, "What do you say, Mr. Malone?"

"Illinois?" Jack wasn't sure why they'd agree to send him there.

Samantha kept her eyes trained on the lawyer, "I called Maria. She said you were in Chicago the weekend you…that weekend. She said she noticed something was wrong, but saw how much the girls seemed to help you. I wanted her to know what happened in case she wanted to…to…I don't know, move or something," she shrugged and wiped under her eyes. "Maria said if you were nearby, she wouldn't keep the girls from you."

Ed leaned forward, "Maria said that?" Before Jack went off the deep end, Ed had been helping him prepare to battle for custody of his daughters. After all the run-a-rounds and hassles Maria and her lawyer had been throwing at them, he was completely surprised that she would capitulate.

"I spoke with her myself yesterday," Alexa interjected. "She stands by what she told Agent Spade." She looked down at her notes and coughed lightly, "There is one more condition Mr. Malone would have to agree to—he is to have no further contact with Agents Spade or Fitzgerald and maintain a minimum ten mile distance at all times."

"What about Agents Taylor and Johnson?" Felder asked.

Meagan answered quietly, "That is up to them. At this time, neither has expressed a desire to sever communication completely."

"I'll need a min—," Felder started to say.

"No," Jack interrupted, "It's a fair deal. What do you want to know?" He looked at Martin's cool gaze and tried to catch Samantha's eye.

Up to this point, she had avoided making any eye contact with Jack. Hell, seven weeks later, she still couldn't get his name out of her mouth without stuttering. But now, now that she had the opportunity to ask him once and for all and then to never have to see or hear from him again, she managed to swing her gaze his direction. Samantha saw true regret in his eyes. Whatever had possessed him to stalk her now haunted him. 'Good,' she thought, 'serves him right.'

Martin grew concerned as the silence stretched from several seconds to almost a full minute. He moved his hand to Sam's back, rubbing gently. His other hand found its way to hers, clenched tightly in her lap. He'd give her a couple more seconds before dragging her out of the room.

With his hand on her back, she found the strength to ask the question that had been plaguing her ever since that fateful night, "Why, J—jack? Why did you do it?" her voice barely a whisper, teary and perplexed.

Once he understood the purpose of the meeting, Jack knew what her question would be. He only hoped his answer would be sufficient enough for her to move past the horrors he had inflicted upon her and that maybe, some day, she might even forgive him. "The month before you got the first box of flowers, Maria, Maria asked me not to come to Chicago for the first time. I had already bought the flowers for you, but then she said hateful things about you and I don't know what happened, but I intercepted them and let them die in my apartment.

"A month later, you said something to me—for the life of me I don't remember what—but I was so angry with you, I decided to send you the dead roses. It kind of snowballed from there. Every time someone higher up criticized me, I took it out on you. Every time Maria denied me time with the girls, I took it out on you. Every time I saw you with Martin, it twisted the knife a little more and I retaliated," he reached for a bottle of water and took a swallow.

Jack took a deep breath and prepared to tell the worst, "That night…when I took you home…just the day before, Maria filed for sole custody of the girls. I was hurt and angry and I wanted to feel like I did when we were together. I wanted to be with you because you made me feel happy. And with Maria, I hadn't felt happy in a long time." He dropped his gaze to the marred surface of the table, no longer able to look at Samantha. He had hurt her too much, "I know it isn't an excuse, Sam—antha, but I will take full responsibility for my actions. And, after today, neither you nor Martin will ever hear from me again." He swallowed hard, his gaze still on the table, "I know this won't mean much now, but I am sorry. Martin, Samantha, I am truly sorry."

Alexa Tafoya turned to ask quietly, "Is that enough Samantha? Martin?"

They both nodded and feeling Sam beginning to shake, Martin led her from the room. He took her quietly to Vivian's new office and closed the door behind them. It had taken the better part of a week, but the entire MPU had been redecorated. The faux wood paneling and black surfaces had been replaced with brushed nickel and real oak. Vivian herself had decorated the SAC's office, and the results were still completely professional, full of FBI personality but with a decided feminine touch.

Taking advantage of that feminine touch, Martin sank into the beige leather couch and pulled Sam onto his lap. "You're the bravest woman I know," he whispered. "I'm so proud of you!"

The past seven weeks hadn't been easy. Danny, Vivian and Martin took full advantage of their week off to see Dr. Harris and try to reconcile the man they knew as their team leader, mentor and friend with the person he had become. It hadn't been effortless.

For Martin, the decision to never have any further contact with Jack Malone was the only decision he could make in good conscious. Jack had turned the woman he loved into someone who still cried in her sleep and was fearful to be left alone.

Danny and Vivian returned from their week off determined to change their environment. They spearheaded the campaign to redecorate, and once approved, followed through on every detail. Paula Van Doren and Victor Fitzgerald held a public ceremony to promote Vivian to head the department once the remodel was done and both Marcus and Reggie stood proudly behind her that day, just three weeks after Sam's attack. Sam had been at the ceremony. "Wouldn't miss it for the world," she said. It was her first day back as a working agent and Vivian toasted her after the ceremony.

For Samantha, coming back into the building was a necessary part of her routine. For the first week after her attack, she bypassed the MPU floor completely, only going to Lisa's. A couple of times the following week she stopped by the floor to check on remodeling, but never managed to stay very long. Until the old look was completely gone, it was difficult to be there.

As for her apartment, she chalked up the deposit of her last month's rent as a total loss when she reneged on the lease she signed. During the week they all were off, Danny, Martin and Viv, along with Marcus, helped her move into Martin's. Someone, she never did find out who, had gone in before her and erased any trace of the attack. The bed was stripped bare, the spilt wine cleaned from the carpet and the broken picture had been removed as well. Even with that, Samantha found it exceedingly difficult to be in the same place where she had been attacked. She felt a surge of pity for women who had no choice but to live in the same place after being raped.

Samantha continued to shake in Martin's arms. Confronting her attacker, her former boss, friend and lover had been one of the most difficult things she had ever done in her life. It had been harder than fighting with her mother, leaving Kenosha and divorcing her husband. Slowly the shakes gave way to the tears and the tears became full blown sobs. She wanted to tell Martin how much she loved him, how much she appreciated his steady presence and how much she never wanted him out of her life.

When she started to shake, Martin knew the tears weren't far behind. He, too, wanted to weep for the nightmare Jack had made their lives. For the nightmares Samantha still suffered. Sure, they weren't as frequent or as strong as they had been, but she still had them nonetheless. Martin held her tight and let her soak his shoulder. He whispered that he loved her and how brave she was and how proud he and Danny and Vivian were. Martin wasn't even sure she heard him until she pulled in one last shuddering breath before speaking.

"I love you," she whispered, her breath tickling his neck. "I love you so much and I'm so grateful you've been with me!"

Martin pulled her back, taking her face into his hands, "I love you too, Sam."

She mirrored his posture, taking his face in her hands and leaned forward, kissing him lightly. It was the first time Samantha had initiated anything intimate since her attack. "I meant everything I wrote and more," she said, pulling back from the kiss. "I would have curled into a little ball and died if it weren't for you, Martin!" She kissed him again, deeper, this time.

When she pulled back he shook his head, "No, you wouldn't have died, Sam. You're stronger than that."

Samantha would have continued to argue, but a knock at the door interrupted them. "Sorry guys," Danny poked his head in, "Viv says she needs her office to interview newbies, but you two are free to go for the day."

"Take me home?" Sam asked with a glint in her eye Martin hadn't seen in a long time.

Hey, thanks to all my loyal readers and reviewers!! This is the penultimate chapter, so thanks for reading all this time! And I hope you've enjoyed!