Author's Note: Well... everyone seemed to like that chapter more than I thought they would... I'm so happy! You all make me feel like... Well... like I'm talented! And once again, I apologize, that chapter was short... but... haven't I proven that I always make up for the things that I feel aren't their best?

And Just letting you all know... I'm not to thrilled with this chapter... I've been trying to get it done for three days now... I had a hard time writing it... I don't think it flows very well... I'm running out of ideas... and I'm getting writer's block every time I sit down to write a chapter...If you would like to see something happen in the future or have any ideas, leave it in a review. Much obliged!

Eternal Luff,

Cat

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Quick Recap:

James watched her fall asleep, continuing to stroke her wrist. As sleep took her, he saw a smile creep over her face, which brought a smile to his own features. He watched her chest rise and fall, and soon found himself kissing her forehead. "Night, love."

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Chapter Twenty Five: Confessions

Lily awoke the following morning, the sunlight streaming in the window. After a moment of laying there, she opened her eyes to see James. Staring at her. In her bed. Apparently noticing the distressed look on her face, he sat up on his elbow, caressing her exposed arm. "Relax, you slept with me last night, remember?"

She instantly relaxed at his touch, and visible calmed as the memory surfaced. "Oh yeah..." She smiled softly, remembering how good it felt to be in his arms. Even after she pushed him away, he still wanted to be with her.

Last night had been so... heated. She wanted it, but she didn't feel like she was ready... James had said that he would wait...but how long? She was scared. She thought about James like this a lot lately... but then... The memory of Lucius was too fresh in her mind... what would have happened if James hadn't shown up?

James, oblivious to her inner turmoil, had leaned in to kiss her. When his lips met hers, she jumped back, the shock of getting ripped from her nightmare memories with a kiss, just as she was remembering how his acid-like lips clamped down over hers in an attempt to silence her and cease her resistance.

They starred at each other for a moment, Lily's hand had flown to her mouth, rubbing her lips as if to rid herself of contamination, and she was breathing heavily. James' eyes showed concern. "Are you alright? I... Didn't mean to startle you..."

Was she alright? It had been a month, if not more since the incident... why was she thinking about it now? It was over... there was no sense living in the past... "I'm... fine. I was just daydreaming..." More like having a nightmare... "I'm going to go get dressed... take a shower... I'll see you at breakfast?" She crawled out of bed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ears as she fled the room, leaving a very confused James all alone.

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"You don't think she's... still thinking about the... incident, do you?" James asked as he sat at breakfast with his friends.

"She very well could be. It was a traumatic event for her. And you and her getting all steamy yesterday night probably didn't help her." Remus said, taking a bite of bacon.

"Thanks Remus. As if I don't feel guilty enough." James sighed and pushed his plate away. "You should have seen her face..."

"Which time?" Sirius asked, which earned himself an elbow in the ribs from Remus.

"Seen who's face?" Lily said from behind James.

He jumped up, making room for her. "Nobody."

Lily eyed him skeptically as she took her seat. Apparently she had recovered from her shock, and with her hair pulled half up, loose strands falling around her face, she looked normal. Lily took a waffle and coated it in syrup, oblivious to the stares of her friends as she cut it apart and took a bite.

"You alright, Lily?" James couldn't help but ask. She gave him a shock this morning. He didn't want her thinking that he was anything like Malfoy. He would never do that to her...

She looked up, mid-waffle, and nodded. "I'm fine, why?" She replied as soon as she swallowed.

James stared at her, wondering if she really needed to be told why. "No reason." He said nonchalantly.

Normal conversation resumed, talking about what the next prank was (at which Lily suddenly became very interested in what was left of her waffle), when the next Hogsmeade trip was (two weekends away), what homework was and was not done, so on and so forth. When Lily had finished eating, James asked to talk to her. Alone.

Lily nodded, saying that she needed to go grab a book from the their rooms anyway, and that he could come with her, if he wanted, and they could talk on the way.

"Lily... I'm really sorry about last night... I... got carried away. I shouldn't have done that." It wasn't exactly what he wanted to say, but it was a good place to start.

Lily looked unfazed. "It's fine. You stopped when I wanted you to. It's not a problem. I'm just..." What was she, exactly?

"Scared?" James ventured. "This morning... you were thinking about... Malfoy. Weren't you?" He didn't need an answer. The red that had crept up Lily's neck was answer enough. "Lily... I don't want you to associate me with...him. I would never... could never do anything like that to you. You mean to much to me." He had stopped walking, and turned her to face him.

Lily's eyes were filled with tears. "James... I... I kept thinking about it..." She broke down into sobs. "All morning... what would have happened if you weren't there." James held her close, rubbing her back as she cried.

"I was there. That's what matters, right?" James attempted to comfort her. "Lucius wouldn't dare touch you now. Dumbledore's still watching him, and so am I. Lily... I wouldn't let anything happen to you."

Lily had stifled her sobs, and was wiping her eyes. "I know..." She sniffed, and rubbed her eyes some more. "It's just that... you scared me... it was so much like..." She couldn't bring herself to finish her sentence. She was comparing James to... him. She shook her head. "I'm sorry. I'm being totally irrational. I know you wouldn't hurt me."

"You're not being irrational. You have every right to be nervous, or scared. Even around me. Especially after..." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "Last night..." The bell sounded, signaling that they should be in class. "Whoops. I guess I made us late."

Lily shook her head. "It's alright. It's partly my fault too... I never had to get a book." She confessed, smiling through her tear-stained cheeks.

"Why don't we just skive off?" Lily looked positively aghast at his suggestion. "We both need some time to cool down." He continued, voicing the reason behind the madness. "We could go back to the dorm, and have some Lily and James time." She stared at him. "Just talking." He clarified.

Lily still looked at him as if he were insane, but she smiled. "Lily and James time?"

He nodded. "Or James and Lily, if you prefer."

She nodded. "Let's go have some James and Lily time."

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Heather sat in Transfiguration, next to Audry. McGonagall was ranting about transfiguring people into objects or animals. Something about it being dangerous to transform into something that doesn't normally breathe unless you learn to circulate something or other. She knew she should have been paying attention to her, but Heather found her focus elsewhere. Mainly the sandy haired boy sitting three rows in front of her and one desk to her left.

At the beginning of class, he had said that he needed to talk to her. But what about? And where was Lily? Madison was sitting alone, furiously scribbling notes as McGonagall talked. James wasn't in class either... though the occasional absence of one of the Marauders was normal. She recalled Remus saying something about the two of them talking... did they skive off together? Lily wouldn't... would she? She had changed a lot since she started dating James. A little more carefree... less of a stickler for the rules. She even became conveniently oblivious when they played pranks.

"Hey. Earth to Wilkisson?" Audry waved her hand in front of Heather's eyes. "I think she died. Or maybe she's sleeping with her eyes open..."

"Huh?" Heather blinked herself out of her reverie. "No. I'm fine. Just daydreaming."

"Oh good then. Would you like to join us here? In class?" McGonagall had apparently called on her, and Audry had spoken when she didn't answer.

Heather nodded nervously and blushed. It wasn't like her to space out, and then get called on. Heck, Heather never even attempted to raise her hand unless she was sure of the answer.

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James and Lily sat together, his arms wrapped tenderly around her waist as they sat on the couch, talking about the issues they refused to voice before. "I feel awkward. All those girls in your fan club hate me. That's half the school, if not more." Lily had rested her head on his chest, and enjoyed feeling his breath on the top of her head. "What if something happens again? Only worse? And you're not there to stop them? I said some pretty awful things to them... awful, but true."

"They wont. And if they do, I'm going to be furious. They know that... I don't think they'd risk it." James answered in a whisper, kissing the top of her head. He had a feeling that this wasn't the only thing she was worried about.

"What about Sirius and Audry? She's getting nervous. It's been a while since they hooked up at Halloween. She claims 'it's only a matter or time before he ditches her, or worse.'. Is Sirius planning anything? You don't have to tell me, but I just want to be able to calm her nerves. She really likes him. I don't want her to get hurt." Lily snuggled closer, thankful that she didn't have to worry about James throwing her away. Not yet, at least.

"Honestly? I don't know. Sirius hasn't mentioned anything about it. And I'd know if he was snogging someone other than Audry. Sirius couldn't keep a secret from me to save his life." Should he ask? It was nagging at him... just a little though. "Lily... what's really bothering you? I want to know what happened this morning. I know you were thinking about Malfoy and what he did to you...but just when I thought you were going to tell me, you turn around and say that you were acting irrational..."

Lily took a sharp breath. "I... don't want to talk about it."

"You've never acted like that, or like this before. Something wrong, and I think that's it."

She shook her head, protesting like a child. "I don't want to talk about it." This time her voice was a little harsher, as if daring him to ask again.

And as we all know, James Potter never steps down from a dare. "Maybe you don't, but I do."

"James... I really don't want to." By now she had sat up and scooted away from him. Even when she tilted her head so her hair fell around her face, he could tell that tears were filling her eyes.

"Lily, love..." He moved towards her, wrapping his arms around her shoulders as she began to shake with her emotions.

"I was fine. All this time... and now I'm scared. Now, after its been over..." She began to cry into his shoulder, her sobs breaking up her words. "I'm terrified to get close to you... when things get... I get so scared. And I feel like screaming."

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Class had finally ended, Double Transfiguration was over. Heather gathered her notes, which was actually a piece of parchment with random doodles around the edges, and the occasional blurb of something McGonagall had said when Audry elbowed her.

Remus waited for her at the door, and together they headed out to the lake. They took up residence underneath the poplar tree, leaning up against it's sturdy trunk. "Are you alright, Heather? You seemed out of it in McGonagall's class."

"Yeah, I was just wondering where Lily and James are... It's normal for one of you guys to miss class, but Lily?" She felt bad not telling him the real reason, but it was part of it. She was still telling the truth, right?

"I need to talk to you about something..." Heather could feel her heart shattering at his words. The 'I have to talk to you' line is never a good sign.

She stood up, aggravated that he would think she would sit here and listen to this. "Forget it Remus. I thought you were different."

"Heather, wait!" She hadn't gone two steps and Remus was already in front of her, stopping her from going any further. "What are you doing?" He was confused, to say the least. The only thing he knew was if he didn't tell her now, he wasn't ever going to do it.

"I'm leaving, Remus. What does it look like I'm doing?" She stared at him scornfully.

"Please, don't. I really need to talk to you." He was practically begging her.

Heather continued to glare, but didn't say anything. He took that as his sign to talk. "Alright. What I'm about to tell you is classified information. I'm actually terrified to tell you, I don't want to loose you over it. But you have a right to know... I already told Lily... and she told me I should tell you." He took a deep breath. "Heather... the reason I was out the other night? I know James told you I was visiting my mother, but... I wasn't out because of her. I was out because of me..."

"Spit it out, Remus!" She was getting tired of listening to him beat around the bush. Was he cheating on her? Is that why it's classified, and Lily said for him to tell her? But he did say that he was scared of losing her...

"Heather... I'm a werewolf. The other night in Hogsmeade, when you and the girls were out? The wolf that tried to attack you all... that was me. That's why I told Lily... because I don't want you guys to get hurt, or worse." Remus was now looking at the grass. How green that grass was... and look, a leaf... and another.

A chilly November breeze took them, as they stood there in silence. Remus had his hands stuffed in his pockets, Heather's hands had flown to her mouth as she stifled a gasp at his news.

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"Lily... I don't know how to prove it to you... I'm not going to hurt you... I don't want to hurt you... ever." James held her close, letting her cry. "I'm not him. I wouldn't do that... I just want you to trust me... If you jump, I'll be there to break your fall. I promise. You took a risk in dating me, and you have no idea what that means to me... I'm happy just being in the same room with you, holding your hand, seeing you smile, even if it's not with me..."

Lily's sobs subsided. She was no longer shaking, and she lifted her head to look at him. Her eyes were red, as was her face, and she was biting her lower lip, as if trying to lock her sobs inside. She hiccuped, and tried to smile. James was so genuine, so sincere, she knew he meant every word of everything he ever told her... even when she thought he was an insufferable prat, he really did like her.

It's more than like... and you feel it too...don't you, dear?

Not you again.

I'll have you know I resent your verbal abuse!

I'll have you know I resent your advice.

I only show up when you need me.

Well, I don't need you.

Yes, you do. James is nothing like Lucius, and you know it. You just have to trust him. You saw proof of that last night. You asked him to stop, and he did. He cares about you.

I know... and... I care about him... a lot...I think I might... love him.

So tell him that.

"James... I'm so sorry... I didn't mean for any of this to happen...I just..." James kissed her hair.

"Lily, it's alright. You don't need to say anything. I already know." She wrapped her arms around his neck and looked up at him. His eyes reflected a warmth, a love she adored. She shook her head.

"No, James. You don't know." James looked taken aback.

He didn't know how the little things he did drove her crazy. When he smiled, winked at her, laughed, ruffled his hair. The sweet things he said, his kisses, his touch. The look in his eyes when he was happy, angry, upset... All of it. She was always thinking about him. But as soon as her thoughts turned toward a more physical relationship, Malfoy popped into her head, and she got scared. "I... I think I'm in love with you. But I'm scared... of getting hurt..."