Matsuda

It's just you and me now…

I looked at Aizawa, practically feeling my eyes bulging out of my head as he finished telling me about what Yoko had done, including details about her suicide.

"She sold us out." I whispered.

"Yeah." Aizawa muttered as he went through yet another stop light. He'd already run two of them, nearly getting us hit at one intersection. He was really upset—I could tell just by looking at him. Aizawa was pretty good at hiding how he felt, but I'd been able to tell something was wrong immediately. I had expected him to tell me someone was dead, but not Yoko.

Actually, I really wouldn't have been surprised if Yoko had been killed, but I was shocked that she'd killed herself.

She must have felt terrible about what she did.

Somehow this was all my fault. I was the one who had told her about Light being Kira. She'd been hired to get to me, that's what the night at the bar had been all about. She had purposely intended to get me drunk in hopes that I would tell her things no one was supposed to know.

Any other day, I would have felt bitter and angry about that. If Yoko wasn't dead.

Things had been going so, so wrong, for what felt like forever, and they only seemed to be getting worse. I'd failed to find Toyoshi, and he just went right on killing cops; I'd lost Sayu. Probably forever. Now Yoko was dead too, and it was just Aizawa and me.

I slid a glance at my partner out of the corner of my eye. He was preoccupied with driving, so he didn't notice me looking at him.

My life was in shambles, I'd lost just about everything that mattered to me, and if something happened to Ai—if he died because of me—I'd probably do what Yoko had done. I'd just put a gun to my head and pull the trigger. I didn't even give a fuck if that's what the Reaper wanted. I wasn't going to be responsible for the death of my friend, and I wasn't going to go and tell his wife and kids that he was gone. I was too much of a coward.

There had to be some way to fix all of this, kill Toyoshi, and protect Aizawa at the same time.

That seemed pretty much impossible, as long as I had no idea where Toyoshi was, and we were running out of time.

We got to the police station in one piece; it was practically empty, and the few officers that were hanging around stared at us like we had the plague. No one spoke to us, other than a rookie cop whose name I was too distressed to remember. He came and yelled at us and demanded to know why we were there. He said this was all our fault and that everyone was going to get killed just because of us.

We both knew he was right, so we ignored him and went to file the report on Yoko's suicide.

Ai was in his own little world the whole time. He didn't talk at all, and he barely looked at me as he filled out the paperwork. I offered to get him a cup of coffee or a donut, but he didn't answer. I wondered if he was mad at me too, just like everyone else. I couldn't see any reason why he shouldn't be, so I slunk over to a seat on the opposite side of the room and stayed there until he was ready to go.

When the paperwork was finished we went back to the hospital. There was nothing else to do: we were out of leads, out of ideas, emotionally drained, and we had to be there in case Mogi's condition improved.

We were only there about fifteen minutes before Aizawa got up and started to walk away again.

"Where are you going?" I asked softly.

"To get some food. I haven't eaten since this morning."

"Should…shouldn't I come too?"

"No. I want to be alone."

"Kay." I couldn't blame him for that. I needed time to clear my head as well; what could I do to protect him anyway? If I were with him when they attacked, they'd have me exactly where they wanted me, and I'd have to see him die.

I watched him walk away, wishing with everything I had that I could keep him from dying too. "Be careful."

Aizawa didn't reply.

For the next thirty minutes, I sat there all alone. A few times, I almost dozed off—I was exhausted from lack of sleep—but I managed to keep myself awake. I had to be alert in case there was an emergency, which there was sure to be soon.

A couple times, I got up to check on Mogi. His condition didn't seem to be improving at all. They had him all hooked up to a bunch of machines, with wires and tubes and cords stuck in him; there was an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, his skin looked pale and gray, and his bandages were splotched with blood. He looked dead already.

I put a hand on his arm, "I'm so sorry, Mogi. Sorry I got you into this."

Mogi didn't so much as open his eyes. For all I knew, he never would again.

Someone whispered my name.

Expecting to see Aizawa, I turned around.

Momo came in instead. He was wearing a long coat, a hoodie with the hood up, with a beanie underneath it, and he had sunglasses on, but I still recognized him.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed.

He looked around like he expected to see an enemy jump out on him at any given second. "Where's yer partners?"

"Aizawa went to get food. What are you doing here? I thought you left town."

"Was gonna'. I have somethin' to tell you first."

"Oh great." With my luck, it was more bad news—I didn't think I could handle any more of that.

Momo came over and got so close to me I could smell his breath as he murmured, "I know where he is, copper."

I fought the urge to gag. It smelled like he'd been drinking all night and hadn't brushed his teeth in days. "Who?"

"Buddha. Who'dya' think? Toyoshi, dumbass."

"What? I thought you didn't!"

"Sh." He glanced around again, and lowered his voice even more, "I didn't. He called me 'bout an hour ago, told me to meet him at his office building over in Shinjuku."

"But we already checked that place out."

"Not that one. He's got another a few blocks away. Now listen, he wanted me to meet him there in the next thirty minutes, but I ain't goin'."

"You think he knows what you did?"

Momo shook his head, "If he thought I was a mole he wouldn'ta' told me where he's at. I think he wants ta' kill me though. He don't need me anymore. Tyin' up the loose ends. So, I thought I'd come tell ya' before leaving town." He pressed a crumpled piece of paper into my hand. "This's the address."

I looked down at Mom's sloppy handwriting for a while. If Toyoshi was really there, this was my chance to kill him. If he was expecting Momo in the next thirty minutes, something told me he wasn't going to still be there in forty. This could be my one and only chance to finish this.

"You should know, kid." Momo continued, that place's gonna' be crawling with gang members—armed gang members—going there's dangerous. But I wanted ta' tell ya'…because…" he looked around the hospital room, "Looks like you're runnin' out of friends—things are goin' just the way he planned. That means, when he's done with me, he's gonna' come hunt ya' down with a vengeance. He's gonna' kill you. But first he's gonna' kill your partner."

And that was the last straw for me. Right there, right then, when I heard those words, something broke inside of me. I decided I wasn't going to let this happen, not anymore. It had gone on long enough, and whether that was my fault, or if it had nothing to do with me, I wasn't going to let it continue; not now that I knew where Toyoshi was.

"Thanks, Momo." I mumbled, touching his shoulder briefly as I headed for the door.

His wide eyed gaze followed me, "What about your partner?"

I hesitated. What about Aizawa?
No. I couldn't take him with me, for several reasons: first of all, I was going into what was apparently a death trap, to have a showdown with an absolute madman who was bent on destroying not only me, but the NPA as well. If I could protect Aizawa I had to, because he had a family to live for. Secondly, assuming I got through the building, past the gang members, survived the shootouts and the firefights, and got to Toyoshi, and actually outlived Toyoshi, then I was going to give him much more than a piece of my mind. This man was responsible for so much pain in my life, the death of friends, the loss of comrades, and I didn't want Aizawa to be there, because I knew that he would try to stop me, assuming I did something…unorthodox to Toyoshi.

Right now, I was so angry, I really had no idea what I was capable of, and if that anger lasted…

"If you see him, tell him I'll be back soon." I said, and left.

"Matsuda? Matsuda, wait!"

Momo came running after me, just as I was checking to see if my gun was loaded.

"This is crazy, you can't go over there yerself!"

"Why not?" I looked at him.

"Look, I didn't tell ya' this so you'd run over there an' get yourself killed, I thought you'd take a police squad or at least your partner with you."

I didn't answer.

He tried again, "Kid, I'm tellin' ya, if you go over there alone, you're gonna' get killed. This's suicide!"

"This has to be over."

"Yeah but…" Momo stopped himself, staring at me a moment, and then he sighed, "Fine, do whatever you want—it's got nothing to do with me."

I heard his footsteps stop, and I knew he wasn't beside me anymore. "Thanks for all your help, Momo."

"Good luck, kid."

I knew I'd need it. I just didn't know if it would help.

The next twenty minutes was a blur, and my mind became a festering pool of red-hot rage as I played the whole scenario over and over in my head: watching Mogi get shot, watching Sayu run away, barely surviving the driveby shooting, barely surviving as Miyami tried to kill me, facing Anubis in the rain. It all came back to me in a furious tirade, washing over me, making it hard to breathe, and the more I thought about it, the more my mind started screaming, This has to end.

I don't know how I got to Toyoshi's building, I don't remember if I took the train or a bus or got a car somewhere, all I knew was that then I was there, standing on the steps, looking up at the skyscraper as the gray-green clouds of a thunderhead gathered above me. And I felt the cold bite of my gun in my hand. And I felt the rage taking over, swallowing me.

Violent images flashed in my head, and I shot Light over and over, guilt mixing with confidence, pain becoming strength. I was going to do this, or I was going to die trying. I deserved that.

I stormed in, kicking the doors open. The building was ordinary enough, with a brightly lit lobby and a smiling receptionist. I homed in on the front desk and went toward it.

"Good afternoon, sir." She smiled. "How can I help you."

"I need to meet with Toyoshi-San." I said. My voice…it wasn't my own. It was too black, too angry, to be mine.

She didn't seem to notice. "Of course. That'll be the top floor. Just make sure you confirm your appointment with the secretary there."

"Thanks." I started to head for the elevator.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a dark shape move behind a corner, and then I heard the familiar, rough click of a gun.

"Get down!"

I dove over the counter for the front desk, dragging the receptionist to the floor, just as an explosion of bullets flew over my head, barely missing me. The woman screamed and we hit the floor hard; I scrambled immediately to press myself against the hard wood of the desk, indicating with my finger for the receptionist to be quiet.

The lobby was still for a moment, and then I heard the tinkling sound of empty gunshells hitting the marble floor, and the click of shoes as someone approached.

"Oooh, Matsuda-san. C'mon out—I know I missed."

The voice wasn't familiar, but I was sure it was one of the gang members Momo had warned me about. Well, I wasn't expecting a welcome wagon.

"I didn't think you'd come, Matsuda-chan, I had you pegged for a coward, but the Reaper knew."

"What's going on?" The receptionist hissed. I could see the fear in her eyes, and smell it on her breath.

I ignored her and focused on my opponent.

Was he alone? I didn't hear anyone else, but that didn't mean shit at a moment like this. He could be out there by himself, with just his automatic weapon, or he could have ten guys covering his ass. There was no way to tell.

I heard a deep, nearly insane laugh, "You're wasting your time, you know. No matter what you do, no matter where you go, we're going to hunt you down. Death will find you."

Trying to think of what I should do, I held my breath. Here I was now, not even past the lobby of the place, and already I was on the ropes. At the moment, I felt relatively safe, but I remembered how easily the bullets of Anubis' gun had gone through the desk in Toyoshi's Yotsuba office and into Mogi, and I knew that I wasn't safe here at all. Just because the receptionist was back here with me didn't mean this maniac wasn't going to shoot again. There was very little chance he'd miss.

But I refused to sit there being helpless. The last thing I wanted was to get shot here, during the first five minutes of my epic battle, so that Aizawa could come later to identify my mutilated corpse and say 'That's what he gets for going without me.'

The anger was still boiling inside me, saying 'who cares? Take the risk—you're going to die here anyway'.

I shook that thought away and went back to the image of the desk being blown apart for some reason.

"I'm going to count to three, and when I'm done, you'd better be on your feet with your hands above your head. You got that?"

The desk—if his gun could just blow it apart, why hadn't he done it yet? The solution was obvious: he didn't want to kill me, or he'd have done it by now.

Toyoshi must still want me alive.

"One…"

So I went back to that little voice in my head. The one that was saying 'take the risk'.

"Two…"

And I went for it. I rolled to my feet popping up above the desktop, and aimed both guns at the first thing that moved. He tried to lift his weapon to shoot, but it was too late. By the time his gun was aimed, I'd already fired three bullets into his chest.

Movement—to the right. I spun on the balls of my feet, just in time to gun down another man with a sub-machine gun.

A bullet zipped past my ear, just barely nicking it.

Behind.

I rolled over the top of the desk, ducking down on the other side of it, and then bolted for the stairwell, firing at the third gunman as I went. My first shot missed, but the next two found their marks, one in the shoulder, the next in the forehead. He flew back.

More bullets. There were so many, I wasn't sure where they were coming from. I dropped to my knees and slid the last few feet, hiding behind a wall. I waited until the gunfire slowed, and then I poked my head around, trying to find the source of the bullets.

There. By the elevator.

I took careful aim with my gun. The bullets hit the wall beside me, exploding through the plaster and wood, but I stayed focused, squeezing the trigger several times. I saw a spray of blood and heard a cry of pain, and the gunfire stopped.

For several minutes, I stayed crouched there, breathing heavily and listening.

Nothing. No footsteps. No guns being reloaded. No voices.

At last, when I felt fairly confident that there were no more, I got up and ventured cautiously back into the clear, looking around, eyes darting at every imagined movement. But I was alone.

From behind the front desk, I heard a faint whimpering.

Oh yeah. The secretary.

Tucking my guns back into my pocket, I rushed over to her, helping her to her feet, "Are you all right?"

"Wh-who are you? What's going on?"

I looked at her. Her hair was all fallen out of place, her glasses crooked on her face, eyes wide with fear and red lips trembling. Did she know she was working for a crime boss? Maybe she was newly hired and that was why she was so low on the ladder.

Not answering her, I went over to the first man I'd shot and picked up his submachine gun. It had a fresh clip in it. Perfect. Upgrade.

Again, I turned to the secretary, "You'd better get out of here."

"Why? Who in the world are you? What are you doing?"

"I'm with the NPA." No time to show her my badge. I clutched my newly acquired weapon tightly and headed for the stairs. Climbing all those flights would be hard, but it was either that or the elevator. They knew I was here, and they knew I'd be going up. At least in the stairwell I'd have room to maneuver.

Already there were voices coming from down a hall to the left.

"I don't know if you know this." I said to her, "But Toyoshi is a crime boss known as the Reaper."

She looked completely bewildered. Definitely a new employee. "S-so…the NPA sent you to infiltrate all by yourself?"

"It doesn't matter. Just go, before you get hurt."

"There he is!" Three men in dark suits emerged from the hallway, all wielding automatic weapons. They aimed at me, trigger fingers itching. "Hold it right there!"

My reaction was immediate-my adrenaline was really pumping by now-and I sprayed a shower of bullets at them, hitting the man closest to me, and he was torn apart, his flesh becoming pulp, his blood a fine mist. Great. I was dealing with hollowpoint bullets.

It was enough to slow the other two down, since they had to stumble over the body of their comrade, and I ran for the stairs.

"After him!"

I heard them rush in behind me as I was half-way up the second flight. The echo of gunfire screamed around me, and bullets ricchochetted off the walls, lodging in the concrete, tearing through plastic, breaking glass. I kept low, firing behind me arbitrarily, and kept running. Once, I actually hit one of my pursuers, and then the last man was left to chase me alone.

When I got to the sixth floor, there was a group of men waiting for me, all wearing dark suits, all with the red k on their jackets.

"Halt!" Screamed the man in front. But no one fired.

They definitely wanted me alive—that gave me an edge. Good news, right? Here I was, infiltrating the main headquarters for a crime syndicate, going right for the boss who wanted to have me tortured to death for killing Kira, and I thought being wanted alive was an edge.

I ran right for them, screaming and firing, gun blazing, and they dropped left and right like flies. I leapt over the corpeses and looked up the middle of the stairwell. More voices. I could see men a few flights above me, and lost of them. There was still the one guy behind me too.

Nowhere to go but…

Throwing my weight against the door, I exploded out of the stairwell and found myself out in a long corridor, shoes squeaking on the floor as I slid to a halt. I looked right. Looked left. No one. Just the freaks behind me.

I ran right, where I saw the elevators far down the hall.

The men came out of the stairs behind me, hot on my heels, and they were firing. I don't know if they just weren't thinking about it, or if they had different orders, but it didn't matter. All that mattered was that I not let myself get shot.

A bullet grazed my arm, ripping through my clothes and scraping off the first layer of my skin. "Dammit!"

Then, when I was almost to the elevators, the doors opened, and another group of men stepped out, shouting and waving their guns at me.

I screamed and stopped so fast I wound up falling on my butt and accidentally dropped my machine gun.

One of the men stood over me, reaching down to grab my shirt front. "It's all over now, kid."

Panicking, I whipped out my pistol, blowing one perfect shot through his face, brains and blood exploding out the back of his skull, and he slumped to the floor.

I rolled to the side and jumped up, dodging the hands that reached for me as best I could. Someone snagged my sleeve, but I managed to wrench away.

Forget the elevator. Stairs weren't an option at the moment. It seemed like I was just running blindly down the hall, occasionally stopping to shoot at the people behind me, but there were a lot of them, and I was getting nowhere.

Then, ahead of me, a godsend: a large picture window where I saw a fantastic view of the city. And also a glimpse of a fire escape.

I must be out of my mind.

Hell, I'd jumped off a building once to save my life, how was this any different?

Gritting my teeth, I charged right for the window, and sprang at the last minute.

Mistake. Big mistake. The glass was a lot sturdier than it looked, the stunt was a lot harder than it looked in the movies. The glass broke, shattered actually, all around me, but that wasn't the problem. The glass ripped through me, shredding my clothes, ripping my skin, cutting me on the face and limbs and chest, slicing my hands and jabbing into me so that I felt a million jabs of pain in a million different places, all at once.

Somehow through it all, I managed to have the presence of mind to reach out and try to grab the ladder for the fire escape. I groped with my fingers, and hung on tight as soon as I felt the refreshing cold of the steel. Even then, my body kept flying forward, and I almost lost my grip, but I white knuckled it, screaming, eyes squinted shut, slammed back against the building once, fingers quivering, and then I was just hanging there, breathing so hard I thought I was going to throw up my heart.

"Holy shit! The fucker jumped!"

No time to panic. No time to lose my mind with fear. They were all coming to the window now, eager to see what had become of me. I twisted around, still hanging on as tight as I could, and aimed up with my gun, blowing the head off one.

"Fuck!"

"There he is! Get him!"

"How?"

"Reaper wants him alive, dumbass!"

Let them bicker. I had to have something under my feet or I was going to pee myself. With shaking arm muscles, I pulled myself up, kicking until I had the reassuring metal of the fire escape beneath me, and then I was climbing like a madman, one hand over another, going for the top, fully determined to climb a twenty story building if I had to.

I heard them screaming beneath me. "Go after him!"

"I'm not going out there!"

"Then you can explain how we let him get away!"

That was good. They didn't know how to deal with what I'd done—really it was just a matter of going back to the stairs and climbing a few flights. If they got on the fire escape above me, I'd be screwed. I guess they were just stunned by the stunt I'd pulled. I knew that if I stopped to think about it, I would be too.

In that case, I'd better not think about it.

A few times, they did try to come out after me. I'd be climbing past a window and I'd see some hideous face behind the glass, then I'd aim and shoot and it wouldn't be a problem anymore.

I wound up climbing until my arms were tired, about ten stories, and then, when I hadn't seen any gang members for a while, I decided I'd had enough of the monkey bars. I kicked in a window and jumped through, collapsing the moment I was in.

For a while, I just sat there on my hands and knees, panting and bleeding all over. Everything hurt, my wounds were burning, and my heart was racing. Just how stupid was I? How could jumping through a window possibly be a good idea? Ever.

When I'd calmed down a little, I got up again, glanced around to make sure no one was nearby, and started running down the hall. I guess they'd lost track of me somehow. Or they'd given up on the hunt. I didn't care where they were or what they were doing, all I cared about was that they weren't in my face right then. I ran to first elevator I saw and practically slammed against it, jabbing the up button over and over until the doors opened.

Inside, I hunched over, hands on my knees, shaking all over and still trying to get a grip. I had known this wasn't going to be easy, but God, this was too much. When I found Toyoshi, I was going to take it all out of his skin, then I'd feel better. Then maybe the vicious anger would finally go away.

I rode to the top floor, interrupted only once when an unsuspecting gang member tried to get on. From the look on his face, he didn't even know I was in the building; he was really young, and he had a cup of coffee in one hand, so I got the feeling he was an errand boy for someone.

I shot him in the arm and kept going, feeling a little guilty for it even though I probably shouldn't have. If he'd had time to react, he could have captured me.

By the time I reached the top floor, my heart was in my chest and my adrenaline was pulsing wildy. My hands were so sweaty I could barely keep my grip on my gun. I took a deep breath and stepped off.

The top floor was completely dark, not a single light on, but there were plenty of windows, so it didn't matter. My elevator opened up in a large waiting room where there was an empty desk, and beyond it was a huge office, even bigger than the one at the Yotsuba building Mogi and I had gone to. The door was open, so I let myself in.

The entire far wall was made of glass, just one massive window, and the floor was a putting green. Off to the side was a huge, black desk, and the room opened up on both ends into other rooms. It had begun to rain outside, and there was lightning when I stepped in.

Someone was sitting at the desk, cigarette blazing in their mouth, but it was too dark for me to make out who it was.

"Well done, Matsuda. I honestly didn't think you'd make it all the way up here."

That voice was familiar… Could it be Troy?

He stood up, hands in his pockets, body posed cockily. "I guess Akki was right about you—you are unpredictable."

I watched him warily as he came toward me, "Where is he?"

"Where's who?" Troy put his cigarette out on an ashtray.

"You know damn well who."

"Why? Do you think you're going to kill him?"

"I think I'm going to punish him for what he's done."

Troy laughed. "Unpredictable or not, one thing is consistent about you, Matsuda: you are ever playing the fool. You think you can punish him for what he's done? Akki was chosen by Kira himself to free the world from fools like you. There's nothing you can do to stop him—after he kills you and your partner, the NPA will crumble, and over time, all of Tokyo will belong to him, and Lord Kira shall return to take his rightful place as god of this world."

That nonsense again.

"Last chance, Troy." I drew my gun. There were probably only a few rounds left between both of them, but I'd use every last bullet and then tear Toyoshi apart with my bare hands if I had to. "Tell me where Toyoshi is."

"Hm. I think not. I think today will be the day you die, Touta Matsuda." One hand slid out of his pocket, and now I could see he had a gun—a nine millimeter. Black and shiney.

Relying completely on my instincts, I fired. The bullet hissed through the air, and struck Troy right in the chest. Glass cracked and shattered, flying everywhere like shards of crystal, and I was left looking at… a broken mirror?

Laughter.

I spun around. And there he was grinning at me, gun aimed at my head. "Idiot. I didn't think such a simple illusion would work, but again, Reaper knows you all too well. Unpredictable and stupid."

"You…" I growled. My gun hand was shaking, trigger finger itching, and I wanted nothing more than to shoot and kill someone, but now I was facing the complete wrong way. Simple trick my ass. It wasn't something I was expecting at all. Not even Light would have been ready for something like that.

Light. I wish he were here right now.

It was my own fault he wasn't.

"Well, it was fun for a while." Troy said, coming closer, "But in the end, I don't think you were anything special. Just another stupid cop. I can't even imagine someone like you killing Lord Kira. It was just a fluke as far as I'm concerned."

"You son of a bitch."

"I've been looking forward to this a long time, Matsuda, ever since that first time we fought, I've been wanting to kill you, and now I finally get to. Akki wanted to do it himself, but I don't think it matters who kills you, as long as you die." He grinned slowly, white teeth flashing in the lightning, and I felt my very heart shiver.

"Sayanora, Matsuda-san."

A single gunshot rang through the air.

Oh my God, he shot me! I've been shot! I'm going to die!

Part of me was so angry, I was almost relieved that this was over, that the anger could ebb away and become something else, even though I wouldn't exist anymore. And the rest of me felt terrible for everyone I was leaving behind. Then again, maybe I deserved this after what I'd done toLight. Maybe this was divine retribution.

But no…wait. I wasn't bleeding, and I didn't feel any pain. I chanced a look down at myself. Nothing. No bullet holes any way. Plenty of cuts from the glass, but no bullet wounds. I looked up at Troy again. He was standing stark still, a trickle of blood running from his mouth. He dropped his gun, gasping.

He hit the floor at the exact moment Aizawa came into the room.

"A-aizawa?" I stared at him.

My partner looked angrier than I'd seen him in a long time, eyebrows set low over his eyes, mouth curled down in a furious scowl. He was coming forward, gun still at ready, barrel smoking.

"Aizawa, what are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here?" He snapped. "That's a fine thing to say! I just saved your damn life—again!"

I scratched my head, "I know…I just wasn't expecting you."

"You know, I'm getting just a little tired of this saving your ass thing. You could at least say thanks."

"Thanks, Aizawa." I said softly. The anger was dying down a little now, being replaced by a sincere sense of gratitude.

"You owe me big for this."

"Right. How'd you find me anyway?"

"Momo told me where you were going—I was lucky to run into him at the hospital. He was leaving. Anyway, enough about me, where's Toyoshi?"

I looked around, "I dunno'. It doesn't look like he's here."

"Damn. Is this guy hard to nail down or what? I guess we'd better search the place anyway." he gave me a once over. "What the hell happened to you anyway?"

"I…uh, I jumped through a window."

Aizawa shook his head, "I don't even want to know. C'mon, let's look around, but stay close."

He started walking toward one end of the room, heading for one of the other offices, and I almost followed, but stopped. Something wasn't right. I still got the feeling that we weren't alone. "Aizawa, wait…"

My partner turned to give me that familiar, annoyed look, started to ask what I wanted.

Then there was another gunshot, and another spray of blood as a bullet ripped through Aizawa's shoulder.

"Aizawa!" I started to rush toward him.

A gun cocked, and a voice said, "Don't even think about it, Touta Matsuda."

He came in from the office on the right, blowing smoke from the barrel of his pistol, mouth smiling, looking like he didn't have a care in the world. He was dressed from head to toe in white, a wide-brim hat on his head, white with a single, red band around it. His skin was pale, his eyes and hair dark, eyesockets looking like two shadows. He looked like a ghost.

The ghost pointed his gun at me, "I advise you to stay exactly where you are."

I stood and watched as Aizawa gasped in pain. He dropped his gun, blood running down from his shoulder, onto his fingers, and he collapsed, holding the wound and gaping and writhing from the pain.

Just like that, the anger was back, erupting within me like a volcano, coming straight to the surface where it was hardest to control, "Who are you?"

He set his dark-eyed gaze on me, "Now really?"

"Toyoshi." Aizawa spat.

"The same." Toyoshi walked right past me, going right to where Troy was laying. "Well Kage, I tried to warn you, but you were an idiot right to the end."

Troy, who I'd thought was either dead or unconscious, slowly opened his eyes, his lips parted a little and he tried to say something. It sounded a lot like 'nii-san'.

"You poor boy. Someone should have put you out of your misery a long time ago—perhaps I should thank Aizawa-san before I kill him."

"Onii…" Troy lifted his hand, like he was asking for Toyoshi to pull him up, "Onii-san…puh-please…help me." He sobbed a little. "Help me…"

"Don't you worry, Little Brother." Toyoshi's smile was as cold as death itself. "I will." He aimed the gun at Troy's head. He pulled the trigger.

I jumped.

"You-you shot him…" Aizawa stammered. "Your own brother…"

"So did you." Toyoshi turned that spine-melting smile on him.

"You're evil." I accused.

He looked up at me, "My boy, I am all there is. I am good. I am evil. I am justice. Hand-selected by Lord Kira, picked by him to carry on what he started, even after he's gone, to prepare the world for his return, for the Paradise that will follow. So I know better than anyone that not everyone can enjoy the Paradise—none of them were worthy. Miyami, Anubis, Nishi, Troy, none of them deserved to see the second coming of Kira. In many ways, their deaths were necessary, because it was those deaths that finally brought you here, Matsuda. To my clutches. And of course you're more important than any of them—you have the esteemed privelage of being Lord Kira's blood sacrifice, and your death alone shall open the path for him."

"You're outta' your goddamn mind." Aizawa sputtered. He'd gotten to his knees, but he was breathing heavily. I was sure his bone was shattered. "If you think killing Matsuda's going to accomplish anything you're out of your goddamn mind."

Toyoshi sighed, "I suppose it would be hard for a heathen to understand. But, you do have to admit, it was brilliant how I worked this all out, all the little details only an artist could appreciate. It was hard, you know, figuring out who killed Kira. I had to do quite a bit of research. Fortunately, Kira has been on my side this whole time. It was thanks to him I received this position of power, seeing how he eliminated most of my competition back before he was killed. I suppose he knew what was coming all along. Like the Christ.

"I was able to figure it out though. Don't you want to know how I did it?"
We were both silent. I was trying to figure out what to do. I still had my gun, but I didn't know if I was fast enough to kill him, especially not when he was on guard.

"After Lord Kira was killed, I started paying special attention to any news articles or reports about the task force, looking for names or any other useful information, doing surveillance here and there. Of course, a bit of bribery was required, even within the police network itself."

"You sonnova bitch." Aizawa spat.

I knew he was thinking about Yoko. Hell, I was too. She was as much a victim as anyone else.

"It was very difficult to get any real information, but I was able to get a name: Taro Matsui. An alias, obviously, but after I found a business card for the same Taro Matsui in the Yotsuba files-supposedly Misa Amane's manager-I began to realize the information might be more important than I'd initially thought. So I had my dear friend Miyami commission a forger his business partner knew to make a fake ID for that very name. Then I had it strategically placed."

"It was just a test."

"That first job? Yes. Yes it was. In fact, the first few murders were just experiments. I needed to see how the police would react to the names they found, specifially Taro Matsui, as well as to the message, and to the fact that cops were being killed in the first place. In the meantime, I approached Misa Amane, who's previous manager had been the alleged Taro Matsui, and we had lunch together. Sadly, she committed suicide a few days later."

"You!" I growled. "What did you do to her?"

"Nothing. I merely suggested a few things to her—I admit they were rather depressing, but I had no idea how unstable she was. Actually, I had hoped she'd be able to tell me a few things about you, but she was useless. Most pop stars are. However, she did prove helpful in one aspect. That message was brilliant—the perfect way to incite fear and panic among the police."

"How did you find out about it?" I demanded.

"Don't be stupid, Matsuda. I had spies in the press. This whole scheme could not have been accomplished without the help of my spies. Spies told me about the message Amane left. Spies gaged for me the reaction of the police when the Ids were found. Spies kept me updated throughout the whole process."

"Was Yoko one of your spies?"

"Yoko? No. Commissioner Oshima was the biggest spy I had in the NPA. I suppose he hired Yoko, because she's always been renowned for her reconnaissance skills. And she was very useful to my cause, seeing how she was the one who confirmed that it was indeed you who killed Lord Kira.

"Atashi Rei had dual purposes as well. After he found your wallet on his property I was able to eliminate all doubts that Taro Matsui was actually Touta Matsuda. Though, I already suspected that, thanks to my conversation with Misa-Misa." He grinned.

I couldn't believe this. He'd been using everyone around us from the very beginning, picking away at our armor until we couldn't defend ourselves.

"I must say though, even I was surprised by how well everything worked out. I have a large following, but I still wasn't sure that I'd be able to kill multiple police officers every day—it was a pleasant surprise when ordinary citizens began to help me out. Loyal subjects: I'm sure Kira will reward them when he returns."

He was absolutely crazy. How could maniacs like this actually exist?

"You might be surprised to know, you actually helped out quite a bit yourself, Matsuda: you tied up a lot of the loose ends so that I didn't have to. Rei, my forger, wasn't supposed to be a part of this. I hired him indirectly to make the Ids, but you yourself continued to involve him; I would have killed him after the failed drive by shooting anyway. At the time, I thought you were just a nosey cop. Now I'm grateful the shooting was a failure, because it gives me the opportunity to end your life myself.

"Then there was Miyami. Sweet, loyal Miyami, my old friend from university. Once Yoko confirmed that you were Kira's killer, I sent him to retrieve you, but you proved too unpredictable to handle, and he knew that I'd punish him for returning empty handed. Another loose end I didn't have to bloody my fingers with."

My heart was starting to sink. I hadn't known that so much would be my fault… It was starting to look like things would have been much better if I'd just laid low at Light's apartment and let the others handle it all along.

"What about him?" Aizawa demanded, jerking his head in Troy's direction.

"Him? My dear little brother? A pawn, naturally. He was already the leader of a notorious gang, 'The Gods of Death', which he developed back when Kira first emerged. They were non-violent back then, supporters of Kira, but most of them were convicts, using the group as a way to hide their criminal pasts from Kira. I used them, as well as my own followers, to eliminate specific NPA officers, just as I promised I would, but Troy also had a special purpose.

"You see, before I realized Matsuda was Kira's murderer, back when I thought he was just another cop, I thought maybe I could use him in some way, so I was watching him closely-mostly because he was sneaking around, talking to Miyami and Rei-and I wanted to understand what kind of man he is. So I sent my dear little brother to find out. The fight outside of Yemma's? It was staged, of course, all to find out how you would react to such a conflict, and I did learn many interesting things. Such as, for example, the fact that you never once went for your gun, even though you were obviously carrying one. Then I sent Miyami in to rescue you. Yes…the results of that confrontation were very interesting. You're a dangerous man, Matsuda, a bubbling stream one minute, a raging river the moment something angers you. But it's hard to tell what will anger you and what will just bounce off your shining armor. Unpredictable. A loose cannon. Dangerous."

He started to pace around the room, going to stand beside Aizawa, "Not that it matters now. You've come to me, as I knew you would, eventually. Really, you've been walking into a trap this whole time, not even aware that you were dancing to my tune. Now, just as I promised, you will face me alone—I will take the last comrade you have, your very last friend, and make you go against me one on one, just to see if his death will light that violent fire that fascinates me so much."

Deliberately, Toyoshi raised his gun pressing it to Aizawa's head, and my friend shivered. I saw the unadulterated panic on his face and felt my guts heaving. No. No. I couldn't let this happen. I couldn't let him kill Aizawa. I couldn't watch my friend die for me. I couldn't let another friend die just because I was stupid and out of control.

"Stop!" I yelled.

"Or what?" He cocked his gun.

Wildly, I raised mine, aiming at his face, but I was shaking so bad, I wasn't sure I'd be able to make the shot.

He laughed at me. "Oh, another interesting test. I know you can use that gun, Matsuda, I know you're a skilled marksman, but the problem is-just as the problem has always been-do you have it in you? Is the fire burning? Is the water raging? Are you angry enough? Or will you only be angry enough to pull the trigger after I've pulled mine."

"Don't!" I felt like I was begging. "Please don't!" Maybe I was begging. "I'm begging you, don't shoot him!"

"I guess the tigers's not alive today—I get to face the whiny child instead."

"Listen to me!" I sobbed. "He's got a family! A wife, kids, a life! You. Can't. Take. That. From. Him!"

"Spare me. He should be grateful—his children will get to live in Kira's Paradise."

"Please! Kill me if you want, but don't kill Aizawa!"

I couldn't handle that. I couldn't bear dying, knowing he was already dead, because of me.

"Matsuda." Aizawa spoke up, his voice sounding horrifically calm. "Matsuda it's okay. Just remember what you promised me."

"Shut up, Aizawa! Toyoshi you'd better not! You'd better fucking not!"

He just looked at me coldly.

"I-I'm sorry." I could feel tears starting to run down my face now, and my gun hand was shaking worse than ever; I almost dropped the gun. "I'm sorry about Kira! You have no…idea…how much I hate it, how fucking sorry I am for what I did! I wish I had just died that day, that's how much I hate having his blood on my hands—I don't even think I can be forgiven for it! I don't deserve to be! I'm sorry I killed him, more sorry than for anything else I've done in my entire life…but…if you kill Aizawa, I swear to God I'm gonna' kill you, and I won't be sorry for that!"

"Listen to what you're saying!" Aizawa shouted. "Just think about it! This guy's a monster, sure-heartless-but he's nothing compared to Kira. You hear me, Matsuda? Nothing! Kira got what he deserved! And Light was dead before that day—Light was dead a long time before Kira died!"

I stared at him, his face all distored from the tears.

"But none of that even matters, because you did not kill Light, Matsuda! You've got to get a grip!"

"Ai-Aizawa…I-"

"No! You hear me, Toyoshi!" He glared up at Toyoshi, regardless of the gun, "Matsuda had nothing to do with it—you seem to like Gods of Death, well here's the truth: a god of death-a shikigami-brought a notebook to this world, and whoevers name is written in that notebook dies! That's how Kira killed, and that's how Kira died! The Shikigami wrote his name in that book, and he died!"

"Aizawa!" I couldn't believe he'd just told this guy that. If he killed us both and got away, if he got his hands on the notebook…

"I don't want to hear it, Matsuda! You shot Light, all right? We all know, boo-hoo, poor you, poor Matsu—now get the fuck over it! Light's dead because Ryuuk killed him, not you!"

Toyoshi was just looking at us, from one to the other, like he had no idea what to think, a look of intrigue in his sharp eyes.

I lowered my gun a little, another sob shaking my whole body as I looked down at the floor. Light…Light I…

"Matsuda." Aizawa barked. "Matsu, look at me. Dammit, look at me."

I forced myself to look up at my partner.

"Shoot this guy. C'mon, do it."

I looked at Toyoshi. I looked at his gun. He was ready to fire at the drop of a hat, "Aizawa, I can't."

"Yes you can! I know you can—look, don't worry about me, you've got to stop worrying about me. This guy's a menace, and if he gets away, God help us all. I'll die smiling if it means you shot this guy."

"Aizawa…no…I can't do it."

"You promised me!" He screamed, his voice a little hoarse. "You promised me you'd do it!"

"But-"

"You're not a killer, Matsu, but you can kill if you need to—even he knows that. You're a good shot."

"Ai-"

"Don't let your emotions get in the way!"

"I-"

"He's not going to be merciful, so you can't be either!"

I lowered my voice. "All right."

His tone was lower too, ragged, and I could tell he was on the verge of tears as well, "I'm serious, Matsu."

"I know."

"Blow his fucking head off."